Random Derp

Brainless:

>Day 666 in Equestria.
>You have been trying to get a big achievement ever scene you came here.
> You finally got one.
>You made a jet.
>Took a lot of time and bit's to do so.
>But you made it.
>You walk out side and see rainbow dash
>"Hey, what's up?"
"Just the biggest achievement in my life."
>"Really? What's that?"
>You show her the jet.
>"That's... What IS that?"
"Its a thing that allows me to fly. Built her from scratch."
>"Wow. But.. It could be about 20% cooler..."
"Hey. It's my biggest achievement ever. So shut it. Do you see me mocking yours? No... Wait... What IS your biggest achievement?"
>"Mine? Well..."
>She raised a hoof to ponder.
>"Oh! One time, I flew so fast, that i gave all my friends puberty."
>wat.
>Gave her friends... Puberty?
>Brain?
>Yea anon?
>Can we ever beat that?
>I don't think so...
>Shit.
"Well.. Uh.. Wanna see if i can beat you in a race with my jet?"
>"YOUR ON!"
>You walk back inside and get in your jet.
>You get in and check all the controls.
>Everything's Okay.
>You get on the runway you made.
"ON THE GREEN LIGHT. WE GO."
>She nods.
>The light turns green, and you take off.
>You suddenly realize you don't know how to fly a jet.
>Brain, you there buddy?
>FUCK YOU ANON, I'M OUT.
>Your head opened up and your brain jumps out with a briefcase and hat on.
>It takes the only parachute.
>It jumps out.
>Well, shit, heart, can you help?
>HURRRRRRRRRR
>Uhh, heart? Why aren't you beating?
>Shit. I'm fucked.