Thread 94: Stories 1-15

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

NC
>Chrysalis
"???"
~~~

SPLAT!

>SON OF A BITCH, WHY!?

"S-sorry."

>WHY, FLUTTERSHY!?

"The voices told me to."

>BUT WHY ME!?

"They... they like it best when you get hurt, you're the funniest."

>...I thought Pinkie was the funniest?

"Not for this one, so, um..."

SPLAT!

>GAH!

"I'm sorry."

SPLAT!

>FUCK!

"So sorry..."

SPLAT!

>RIGHT IN MY EYE!

"I'm not enjoying this, really."

SPLAT!

>HOW MANY OF THESE DO YOU HAVE!?

"...Maybe a little bit."

SPLATSPLATSPLATSPLATSPLATSPLATSPLAT

"Hee hee."

>FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Chrysalis
"Pommel"
~~~~

>Swear, I'm going to set fire to this place before I leave... every time I come over here, every single time...

"Please don't do that, I've had enough fires for today."

Her eyes never even cut back behind her, yet even he could tell she knew where he was. Likely had known since the second he arrived. She was scary like that.

>There is exactly one white unicorn I like, pony, and you are not him. So kindly fuck off before I'm forced to vent my frustration at you. It involves fire.

"Lots of stuff with you does, I noticed."

Slowly, she turned to him, fires in her eyes as hot as any she could conjure.

"Like that for instance."

>What. Do. You. Want.

"...look, I know we got off on the wrong hoof- hey!"

She didn't pause for a second, already walking off.

"Hey, listen, I just want to say thanks."

>I didn't do shit.

"No, but your guys did, and they didn't have to. Look... I know how they felt, and trust me, I get that there's still some... issues with the guard and your guys-"

>HAH!

"...Fine, understatement, but regardless, we wouldn't have been as effective without them, and I really do appreciate it."

She never stopped, and he struggled to keep up with her long strides.

>What a surprise, you were more effective with the superior military who easily thrashed you on your side, whatever are the odds?

"Hey! We've become a lot stronger since that day."

That is what finally made her slow, and look back.

>...so have we.

Just long enough to say that, and then continue walking.

"What's your problem? I'm trying to thank you here."

>I didn't do shit.

"I'm thanking them, then."

>They don't need your thanks.

"Why, because you said so?"

She slowed once more, but did not look back.

>...Is there an issue you have with my leadership?

"...No, it's not like that, it's-"

>Good.

Again, she continued on. Again, he struggled to follow.

"Come on, we both know this situation was awful for everyone, do you really want it to not get better? Don't you just want things to get better... a little?"

>Things have gotten better for me, immensely better. I'm more powerful than I've ever been, and when it's finished my hive's HOME is going to be nice and shiny... unrelated to the actual Shiny, of course.

"I meant here in Canterlot, do you always want to be our enemies?"

That was it. She stopped. At last, she finally, completely, stopped, and looked back to him. Turned to face him, completely.

"I get it, this wasn't... good. You think that we planned this, that we were trying to hurt you, and it's all our fault and we endangered your guys. Well, we weren't. Next to none of my guys liked yours before today, but you know what? Fighting together like that is something soldiers understood, and in both those fights they worked together. Now, you can lock them up, run off, call us assholes and never think about this again, that's your choice. I'm not 32, I'm not here to kick you out, I'm not here to get your army, I'm here to say thanks to a bunch of guys who had every reason not to fight, and stuck by those who couldn't protect themselves. I want this to get better.... don't you?"

>...it's been a long time since I thought this could get 'better', pony. I have found something that works, and I am sticking to it.

"...Have you?"

>Yes.

No hesitation, not a second.

"...I just want to say thanks, that's not too much, right? Even your guys appreciate a pat on the back every now and again."

She stared at him with a glare, boring right into his very soul with her eyes. She stared, and stared.

>...Fine, tell Forty Two, "Your Queen commands, five minutes, then drag my stupid ass out if I try to stay in there a second longer and beat my fucking skull in if I say something stupid."

"...Can I just say five minutes?"

>No.

"...Meh..."

As she walked away, all he could do was shrug.

"It's a start."

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 >AJ
"Coltsy"

>Soooo, those robots

"I know, I know, was quite odd, and destructive and all, but, we always guarantee a proper safety disclosure"

>Listen y'all got some serious safety flaws in those bots, ah'm trying to give them th benefit of the doubt btut all that happened were some jumped up HyperSpace HyperWars models hijakced them and took control. WHY DIN'T Y'ALL THINK OF THAT?!

"Sorry but our manufacturing standards didn't include that as a hazard, but we WILL be informing central of this bug, and we've already got a cram-fix working here."

>...Well, guess y'all sorted it out

"And the Guard and Changelings of course"

>Oh sure, y'see, ah' told y'al them bugs themselves ain't a problem

"....Actually you never told me that"

>....Well now ah' did!

"Well, you should've seen it in person, but where were you? I did hear some...let's say "dissatisfied customers" mention a lack of higher authority figures during the mini crisis"

>...

"...Is there no air conditioning in here? You seem to be sweating bullets

>...wasbusyhavin'funwithallmahfriendsinagiantmagicthingmagicroomwhereweplayedOnOandkindagotaheadofourselves

"I beg your pardon?"

>Gotta go!

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 >Luna
"Applejack"
[Spooks]

>Ah, good Applejack!

"Luna, didya really have to burst into mah office?"

>Of course! We must! You aren't in any other place most of the time!

"....ow"

>But we are at an impasse, we thought thou would be inspired by our tactical reset of occupations in the simulator, and take up magic for good!

"...Yeeaaaahhh, no thanks? Like Ah'..."appreciated" it, in the same way ah' appreciate somepony yellin' at me t' do somethin' ah ain't got any interest in"

>Well that is quite unfortuneate that somepony would ask thou of that

"...rightoveryerhead"

>But thou must learn thine magicks! Did it not feel good when thou had that power within thee? To bend the world to thine whim?

"Kinda...it was, well, when it worked an' all"

>Oh perfection takes practice, but did thou not feel the potential?

"..Mmmm...."

>Well?

"nnnn...NNNNNN...IT WAS ONLY WHEN AH' WAS PLAYIN'!

>Eep!

"Yeah!..Yeah...jus' foolin' around an' all ah' was, all dat magic-shamgic was weird an' wacky cos we were...heh...we were all actin' up"

>Applejack, thou seems a tad... unnerved.

"Oh pshaaaw, besides, ah' had mah funky horn jigglewatsits, buuut, ah' prefer to do mah life's work a' all the good ol' natural way."

>Hmph, does thou mut feel so reductive to your own magic?

"Oh quit grumpin' ya' hussy, so did y'all come to yell at me for somethin' pie rleated or what?

>Well. We WERE going to see if thou wished to just have a stroll outside for once? We swear thou hast gathered dust from sitting there over time. The gardens perhaps? At least?

"...Alright, fine, ya' win, ah'll strethc mah legs some, promise this ain't some kinda trick."

>No. there is no such contraptions or happenstance

Applejack left, silently infuriating Luna with how she trotted by and picked her hat up with her hooves instead of through magic

>.... Are the slingshots and redoubts ready?

From a silent shadow came a silent voice

[Yes, Majesty]

>Verry well, this shall be fun

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 >Rarity
"Cadence"
~~~~

>Cadence? Darling? A guard said they saw you run off into the magic room, is everything alri-GOOD HEAVENS! Get down from there!

"Can't talk, Rarity, Sciencing!"

>...Is that what that is? It looks to me like you're upside down on the ceiling and staring really hard at a burn mark. Hence the, 'get down from there' statement, those things are probably still live!

"Isn't it obvious? My horn's glowing! Science!"

>...Sure, that all adds up. And what, deary, are you... 'sciencing'?

"I'm rating the residual Sparklejoule energy of this burn mark, trying to ascertain if it's higher than a light blue to forest green, and if it is the fade off would be high enough to mean that the initial wave was... and I can't believe I'm even saying this... maybe even a lime green! Or, dare I say it, LIGHT LIME GREEN!"

>...A-ahhhh? Oh... oh noooo?

"..."

>...I mean, yay?

"..."

>...Help me, darling, I'm totally lost here.

"It means that... uh... I don't know what it means but I need to know that it's what it is!"

>...This isn't just an excuse to get out of doing your work again, is it?

"Hey! I'll have you know I did TEN whole forms by myself, no helpsies, yesterday!"

>...Doesn't she normally have hundreds?

"You don't run a mile in a day, Rarity!"

>...You actually do in much less time, longer than that would be rather unfortunate.

"Look, just hush and let me see if these residual Sparklejoules match up the the numberation of my colors to make this not a something instead of a nothing which might mean a something but I don't know what and if it's good or bad or nothing!"

>...Okay.

"..."

>...You need to concentrate, or you're going to-

"WAH!"

CRASH!

>...Do that. You okay?

"MY WINGS!"

>Just checking.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Spike
"42"
'DT'
[SS]
{PJ}
~???~
~~~~

In a room, dimly lit, barely used anymore these days, a makeshift gavel banged down, and called the attention of the various group members who were already clearly paying attention.

So, it did nothing, but Spike liked banging it so it there.

>Alright, emergency gun club meeting has been called to order!

"I don't know it counts as an emergency meeting, more like an emergency stopping Diamond Tiara from firing off anymore rockets into the sky."

'Got your attention, didn't it!?'

[It also almost got us arrested, a lot.]

'They can't take me!'

{It also almost exploded me, a lot.}

'...I didn't see you.'

{Oh? I guess you suck at not detecting stealth.}

'URGE TO KILL RISING!'

>DT? Save it... no, really, save your ammo, that's got to be expensive.

'AHAHHAHAHAAHHAAHH!'

>Point taken.

"What did you want, exactly?"

'What did I want!? WHAT DID I WANT!? What the fuck happened up here!?'

>Dunno, wasn't present.

"We were having fun in a game."

{I apparently got REALLY hammered and drove my gear headfirst into a potato field... like, really hammered.... "I need to go make sure there isn't a sex tape out there with me in it" hammered... it was bad.}

"What about you two?"

'HRMPH! Not that you CARE, but we-'

[We went to an amusement park... it was fun.]

'Because SOMEBODY didn't invite us to come have fun in their game!'

>Be fair to me. Part of that was because neither of you play OnO, part of that was because I expected Shiny to just get swarmed with mares trying to have sex with him.

{WHOA WHAT!? Hold up, I didn't know you guys partied hard! Forty Two you DOG! I knew you weren't as stiff as a brick!}

"..."

>...They didn't.

{I dared to dream.}

[...Where's Seventy Seven?]

'In Ponyville.'

>...

"...How could you know that?"

'I'm rich.'

"That doesn't... there's nothing..."

'...'

>...Huh.

'Well, next time invite me!'

>Why, so you can miss it all too with us? We MISSED IT. All of it.
'W-well... still!'

{Kid, there is a lot of stuff I want to do with you. Get hammered and go on a flying bender is not one of them.}

'...I could've taken her!'

[Or you could have blasted an already wrongfully blasted mare in a small enclosed space and caught everyone on fire while you brought down the castle from the inside.]

'I have freezing stuff!'

[...That's not... that's... it's not any...]

>That it? We good?

'HRMPH!'

>Good! So... anyone just wanna... kinda hang out?

"I should really get back, I don't know how long it'll last."

>How long what'll last?

"...."

~~~~~

Tentatively, the door to the ballroom cracked open a hairs width, just enough that a single eye could look through it. Sure enough, they saw a body out there.

A body made of black straw with a cardboard helmet on top of it, as fake looking as can be.

~.... It's clearly a trap!~

~Seriously, I bet she's IN the damn scarecrow!~

~I DON'T WANNA DIE!~

~I JUST WANT TO GET A SMOOTTHIIEEEEE!~

The scarecrow just stared.

~~~~~

"...It'll probably be fine. So... what did everyone get up to?"

{Well, I'll have to check with Blueblood and Haymaker first, but with how sore my back legs, lower back and head are, there's a really scary chance I got spi-}

"NOT! YOU!"

{... Just a little innocence ruining?}

"NO!"

{Plplplplp.}

'Well, since you all CLEARLY want to know.... get some snacks, this is a big one.'

>...

[She isn't joking.]

"I feed off love."

'Well then, sounds like you're set!'

>What about me-

'IT ALL STARTED WHEN...'

>...Sad part is I kinda missed this...

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Pommel
"Scarecrow"

>...

"..."

>...uhhh...so do I wait for her to come back to tell her I got clearance or...

"..."

>I feel like that's the safe option.

"..."

>...yeaaaah, definitely the safe op-

~Dude why are you talking to it!?~

>I'm talking to myself with it in front of me! There's a difference!

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Celestia
"SA"
~~~~~

Inside, Princess Celestia always wondered if other countries rulers acted like she did to their former guards, or if she was just crazy.

>Walking out of your room with another mare? Oh, Shiny, you're just incorrigible. I'll have to get the ice bucket on standby at this rate!

Probably the latter.

He gave a chuckle, playfully shoving the mare on the shoulder and edging her just slightly off balance, but of course not enough to knock her over.

"Upset I didn't invite you?"

>Oh, of course! Really Shining, you could've at least offered to let me watch.

"And have you critiquing my form the whole way? Never, stuff like this is unnerving enough as it is."

>Practice makes perfect, after all, I'd only give good advice.

"Heh... well, I think I managed okay. Left with a smile on her face after all."

>Oh, well, so long as everything ended up okay...

"..."

>...Do you want to talk about it?

There it was, the sigh. The sigh that said "I've had a rough time, and it's going to get rougher, and no, playful double entendre's are not going to help."

Was going to be one of those days.

"...Soooo, Spitfire has noticed some... things, regarding certain alicorns of pink and unbeatable hotness, and her seemingly impossible ability to be one place and be doing paperwork in another."

She shouldn't have laughed, but at least she felt sort of bad about it.

>Really? She just caught on now?

"It's not something we openly discuss."

>I suppose not... and?

"And, well... Sunset got a hold of this information, and that's where she's been today, and well.."

>...Go on.

Her phrasing said she wanted him to continue. It couldn't have been further from the truth.

Still, go on he did. He told her exactly what Spitfire apparently had, left out no details he could recall.

And her heart sank more and more with every single word by the end.

>...I see.

"Me and Spitfire are okay now, but well..."

>...Well what?


He cocked an eyebrow, fur bristling in a way that would be unnoticable to any but those who knew him as intimately as she did.

"Well, your ex-student, who you promised me you were going to work on, just shoved my friend into a wall because said friend was trying to prevent her from exposing my wife's flaw to the world. Now, I'm annoyed enough she managed to trick Spitfire to get into Eighteen's office, but-"

>She did not trick Spitfire.

He paused, and there went that bristling again.

"...Oh?"

>Shining, I cannot say for sure I understand that mare completely, I doubt any do... including herself, but one thing I can tell you with one hundred percent certainty is that, at the start at least, she was one hundred percent sincere. Everything she said at the start is what she meant, even if it... changed, with certain revelations.

He cleared his throat, shifting from hoof to hoof ever so slightly to offset the uneasiness of her steely words.

"It sure didn't look that way to me."

>That's because you're reacting as Cadence's Husband, not as you normally would. And, to be blunt Shining, you always see the... darker side of ponies when they threaten your wife. You forgave Spitfire right away because she jumped to Cadence's defense, but because Sunset had to be forced...

He snapped up to her, unable to deny the accusations, but unable to roll over either.

"Regardless of those factors, what she did was completely unacceptable, and something needs to be done. Now, normally, I would handle this myself, but because Spitfire had to admit her guilt over here, it's technically in your jurisdiction, so... it will have to be you who handles this."

>Oh, I agree, but do you want me to react as Celestia... or as a Princess would? Because there are two ways to react to this, Shining, and most royals do not tolerate it when others infiltrate allied lands and attempt to destabilize friendly monarchy. So... are you asking, as a Prince of the Empire, for me as a Princess to take the appropriate action against her? Because we both know what that entails.

She knew, at least part of her did, that she was going a bit low with that one. Very low, if she was being perfectly honest with herself. But desperate times called for desperate measures, and there were very few things in this world that might make the one she trusted implicitly to act against his better judgement.

One of those things was, unquestionably, someone going after one he loved. It could have been Cadence, Two, Eighteen, Forty Two or even Chrysalis or Herself, if Sunset had tried these same measures with any his response would have been the same.

It warmed her heart to know this, but it chilled her to imagine that drive focused on someone she knew. They would not come out unscathed.

Unless...

"...No, of course I don't want you to... come on, Celly, I know how much her being forced to leave hurt you, I'd never put you through that again if I could stop it. I just don't want to risk Cadence being publicly shamed like that, it's not like I want her burned at the stake... come on, she's still your student, even if she isn't anymore."

Unless that.

His drive against those he hates is strong... but she knew his love would always be stronger.

>I'm sorry for doing that, but you were getting... like you get sometimes. Even if you don't mean it.

He sighed, obvious to the world that he understood.

"Yeah... I do. But Celestia-"

>I agree, and we both know that I'm not going to let her do what she wanted to do. Politics is a very unsteady game, and the just answer doesn't always have the best results. I will speak to her.

"Good. I trust you."

And she knew he did, without fail or hesitation. For his love was not the only one with unmatched strength, she knew... No. They both knew, quite well.

>I'll handle it.

"...So, you really think that she was... you know, being honest? So then, why snap like that?"

This part was going to be harder to explain.

>Shining... Sunset has always been a very... let's say, rash mare. Making decisions based on the information in front of her and very little else. When I denied her certain magics, she snapped and tried to take them anyway. When I banished her from the castle, she snapped and tried to take even more. She snapped and snapped and snapped, every time. So... for this, I do not expect you to condone or be okay with what she did, but... I think, at least partially, I understand it.

Her hooves became light as she began to pace, memories she had kept hidden away coming back to her once more. Never once did he speak, for he knew she needed this.

He always knew.

>She has always put the rank of Princess on a pedestal, seen it as some kind of ultimate culmination of the greatest that Equestria has ever offered. To be anything less is to damage that ideal of what a princess is, and should be. To find out that Cadence has been... slacking, it sparked something, I fear. Her intentions were not to sell this information or to blackmail her, but to tell the world. Her first wish, and I doubt she realizes it, was to tell me and them that this princess was a sham, to reveal her and validate herself against all who said she didn't have what it took to be a princess. She wasn't looking to destroy Cadence, I doubt that she even feels the same now that time has passed, and she realizes the damage. She just reacted as she always did. Rashly, without thinking, and she wished to feel validation at last. She wanted them all to hear it, from her... the princess is a mare behind a curtain, and you've all been duped, and she was right all along...


It felt so good to get it off her chest, even better to watch him drink it all in, understanding it as only someone who knew how she spoke could. He shifted, from the guard ready to protect his princess..

To the stallion, realizing an animal had been hiding it's wound, and he hadn't even noticed the limp.

>...It's still unacceptable, she should know better than this, should know the risks of exposing information like this on a worldwide scale, and I will have words with her... but I understand why she did it. She didn't wish to see Cadence bleed, Shining... she wanted to show the world a princess could. It's not acceptable, but this... I can deal with, and fix.

"...I trust you."

Of course he did. He always did.

...and she wouldn't let him down this time.

>...Well! Thank you for telling me first, I shudder to think what might've happened if she had done this to some other royal.

"Could you imagine what Chrysalis would have done?"

Involuntarily, they both shuddered. They didn't believe her evil or monstrous as some did...

But there was a fairly sizable gap between the two and 'nice', and she was nowhere near the latter on the scale.

"...Change the topic."

>Very well! For future record, I'm not moving from my spot on the Bed, that is prime Two snuggling spot and it is the only reason I sleep over there those days.

"Gasp!'

>Indeed, Shining, it pains me to admit, I'm not there to sleep with you, I just like hugging your daughter. She is the cuddle buggy teddy bear that makes all the bad thoughts go away, I never had any intention of sleeping with you.

"Betrayal! Betrayal of my heart! Like a knife, Celly! Like a knife!"

>I'm sorry... but I'm still not moving. She can schooch in between Forty Two and Eighteen.

"Poetic!"

>Did you want me to offer Sunset a chance for the bed too, or are you satisfied with one yellow mare of exceptional talent?

"Hold on, let me check the paper... it says here I'm an unstoppable fuck machine that goes after everything that moves in a never ending explosion of a harem, so see if she can squeeze in between Chrysalis and Eighteen."

>And you said you were terrible at poetry!

"No no, pottery, can't sculpt to save my life."

>Much like a good 'private session', it's all in the ankles... as I'm sure you know.

"Ouch! OUCH! That was low. Got me right here. Right in my stallion pride."

>Ohhh, sorry. Want me to kiss it and make it better?

"I'm not falling for that one, I've seen how you get with frosting."

>Guilty!

"Ha!... Ohhh, you know, Celly? That sun could not be a more perfect cutie mark, you always light up my life.'

>Oh, you cheesy sod... so, shall we be off to hear Sunset's no doubt horrid reaction to learning that Applejack was in on it the whole time?

"Think it'll be better or worse when she knows you were too?"

>...Let's just go.

"If you say so. HIYA!"

>EEP!

He playfully gave her a firm smack on the rump, shuffling her forwards just a bit.

>Unfair! Foul play, Shining!

She tried to run out of the way, sure her long legs would allow her easy escape.

She did not count on him summoning a shield in the shape of a hoof.

"This is revenge for the towel. HIYA!"

Smack!

>EEP! Not so hard!

"You know you love it. HIYA!"

SMACK!

>Ooooh~ right there... momma likes.

"Okay."

SMACK SMACK!

>EEEEP! Blast, saw through that one!"

"Run sunhorse, run!"

>Curse you, Bubblehorse!

SMACKSMACKSMACK!

And they were off, all the dignity of two teenagers running down the halls...and all the kinship only two like them could ever have.

>EEP!

Two white ponies of royalty, trying to get it right after failing for so long.

...And always having the other to count on.

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Guard
"Changeling"
~~~~~

>ANNNNDD COMIN' AT YA' LIVE! It's Fuzzy and the Buzz!

~Fuzzy and Buzz in the morning, 97.1!~
~LUUUCY! I'm hooooome!~

"Our top story today, Centitrain on the move!"

>That's right my buzzy bro, Centitrain has been moved back to her room after a nasty run in with the Titan of Stompy Stomp herself, and she's gonna be okay!

~*APPLAUDS!*~

"Ooof, poor girl, took it pretty hard, but Fluttershy has assured us she's 100 percent fine!"

>Laying it on thick, Buzzy, trying to go for a new kinda bug already?

"OHHHHH!"

~*WHISTLES!*~
~GOT LEGS FOR DAYS!~

"You're damn right she does! But come on Fuzzy, I'd never step on your game like that. Finally! When she says it's like a hotdog down a hallway, you can just be like 'DUH!'"

>OHHHHHHH

~YODLEEHHEEHOOOO!~

>One more quick update, the Gunclub have reassembled!

"Yes, that is in fact what all those bombs in the air about, they were not celebrations that Fuzzy has managed to touch a mare and she didn't call the guards."

>OHHH!

~Don't touch MMEEEEEEEEEEE!~

"That's all the show we have for you today, but we'll keep you posted as it happens! Till next time-"

>-I'm still Fuzzy-

"-And I've always got THE BUZZ! GOODNIGHT!"

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>42
"Spike"
~~~

>...

"...Soooo.."

>...

"...now that the others are goooonnneeee..."

>...

"....you wanna tallllk about iiiitttt?"

>No.

"You suuuuuure?"

>Yes.

"...Suuuuurrreeeee-"

>It was to break a spell.

"And you didn't enjoy it at alllllll?"

>...

"...Ehhhhhhh?"

>I do believe I only told you that so you'd trust me.

"And yet, here we aaaaarrreeeee... and you kissed my sister in laawwwwwwwww..."

>Stop that.

"Stop whaaatttttt?"

>Talking like you are on medication. Stop it.

"...Forty Twooooo?"

>NO!

"..."

>How much, or how little, I enjoyed the NECESSARY and PROFESSIONAL act is irrelevant. It is in my best interest if none know of my stance on the matter, and I would like it kept that way. Clear?

"...I'm a dude, and I can tell you, you are just the WORST with maretalk."

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Applejack
“Luna”

The Castle gardens had a gentle mountain top breeze blowing through it as the two Princesses strolled along an often trotted path, the Moon Princess admiring certain canopies with interest, head snapping back and forth, wiggling her eyebrows…appreciatively at them.

The Apple Princess looked more amazed that the “disaster of the week” had left the shrubbery and such unspoilt, stopping often to prod at the earth with her hoof, mumbling to herself. Giving Luna the chance to reach up and whisper into the leaves.

“So, Princess, how did our fair Applejack find her magical adventures? We believe there was good ground to start with, in fact, let us say there is a LOT thou needs improving on”

Applejack snorted derisively her hoof trailing the bed of some flowers that had a long old name to Luna, but only AJ knew them as “hornet swogglers”, patting the earth firmly against their base.

>Yeah yeah, it was reeeeal nice havin’ mah control taken away from me an’ all. Y’know somethin’?

“Yes?”

>The only time mah magic REALLY worked? It was when ah’ cast that magic missle and ensnared Chrysalis and her friends, that was… that was pretty darn funny

“Yes, we saw, quite the comeuppance”

>Well… ah’ dunno if y’all were payin’ much attention aside from that, but all th’ other times ah’ tried to use magic? Din’t work, jus’ went and bit me inna flank each time

Luna rolled her eyes quickly, this was going to be quite the stretch

“Well, Applejack, walk with me some more”

She did, unbeknownst to the orange mare, towards a planned point where shadowy figures hid amongst the tree canopies, their skilled magic hushing the creek of ropes on logs around them as they groaned under the weight of the tension.

“Now, what thou seem to not understand about magicks, is that they are not a mere tool, not something to be played with, used and forgotten, they are… let us say a form of control, a means to understand oneself greater, and bring unto themselves autonomy of the mind, and strength of will, it is… let us say… to function above one’s own instincts”

>…Luna? All Ah’m sayin’ is that there is a right load of hokum to mah ears
Luna really rolled her eyes at that one

>It’s just… ah can do things jess’ fine without all the… uhh. Autonomymuhjigger, Ah’ got a decent head on my shoulders, Ah’ can figure things out mahself! It’s mah choice how ah’ do things, so Ah’ll do ‘em as ‘ah see fit

{She’s adamant, do you think she’ll learn from all of this}

[Luna said so herself, we must see to it that she figures these things out the hard way]

Above them, in the “lead” canopy, the two nightguards held onto their log swing, they knew, planned and co ordinated how this would unfold,
their other 3 compatriots sat in cross position, waiting for the signal

The two hushed voices were unheard of down below, as Luna proudly unfolded her wings.

“Applejack, we do not believe you quite understand, fundamentally, there isn’t much thoucan do “choice” wise, it will..welll…”
Deftly, her wing tucked into Applejack, yanking her side by side to the Lunar Princess.

“It’s… balance, balance of the mind, understanding ones own strengths and weaknesses, and being able to think, not just rationally, but magically; deftly and quickly. To think beyond your own hooves, to take control of your power and being resolute in your actions.”
Applejack squirmed at Luna’s odd embrace, pondering what she was saying; balance of the mind? Thinking magically? Resolute? Was that one a bill?

>Listen, Luna girl, ah’…really appreciate this, ah’ mean ah REALLY a-PPRECIATE IT…

“Don’t grind your teeth, young one, it’s bad for you”

>Mssfrmwmfm….Buuut, Ah’ve been doin’ all this here Princess stuff just fine…okay? Celly told me the whole Princess gig was somethin’ to do with a beat cop or whatever. Luna? Ah’ grew up tryna learn how t’ solve things properly,an’ ah’ did, cos Ah’ was taught well how t’… fix things, y’know?

She broke away from her wing and turned to face her, a look of both pride and indignation on her face.

>Every…everythin’ Ah’ learnt was to figure thing’s out for mahself, not use some… weird glowly stuff, ya’ gotta jess’ use your head, and yer heart. An’… sometimes, heh, ya gotta just kick right through yer problems. It’s intuition, that’s what we called it, an’ Ah’ got plenty of that to go around.

“…Hmmm, so you say you feel… confident in solving problems the old…Earth Pony way?”

>Well, o’ course! Ah’ grew up like that an’ all, so why not? You got any other ideas?

“It’s simple, your own heritage as an Earth pony must be complimented with the wit of a Unicorns magic, it is only to find a balance within you, the knowledge to solve a problem in more than one direct route out.”

>Yeah well, that “direct route” is the steady one, ifin it fixes it, no matter how much ah’m gonna work, then so be it, Ah’ll get it done.

A small smirk came across Luna’s face, her eyes lit up, wings perking back to their regal stance again.

“Oh yes, it may work, but if you used your magic as well, you may find things…much QUICKER!”

With a yell, she shot into the air, above the trees.

Before Applejack could react to her flight, a flurry of swishes and leaves crackling caught her ear, the rustling of the tree right in front of her suddenly became a large log, suspended horizontally by two thick vines, and swinging straight towards her.

>GAH!
Was all she yelled as on instinct, she whirled around and lifted herhind legs up to full bucking bronco position, the brief glimpse of the log showed an abundance of moss, and brittle cracks on where it ended, she could shatter the thing with a yell placed kick. Her eys closed as she whipped around, baring her teeth for the impact, and throwing her legs out in a kick-

Thump

She quickly lost balance as her legs met only air, and she toppled backwards, landing flat on her belly with an “Oomph!”

>Aww, the hay?-

She looked up, and to her left, and then to her right.

Unbeknownst to her, were three more logs, caught in mid swing, perilously close to her.

And held in place by a familiar blue aura of magic

Then came the booming voice she should’ve expected to come sooner. She span around and saw

“APPLEJACK! THINE SKILLS IN MAGIC CANNOT BEGIN TO GROW, IF THOU DOES NOT SENSE IT’S CALL TO THEE! THOU MUST FEEL IT ALWAYS WITHIN THEE! BECOME ONE WITH IT’S POWERS! FOR NOW! THOU ART BLIND! ONLY STRIKING OUT AT WHAT THOU CAN SEE!”

>Y’ALL DANG INTERFERING FATASS! THAT COULDA HURT!

“Oh…My dear Apple Princess, don’t you see? All you sensed was what you saw in front of you, with magic you would FEEL the movement around you, and act deftly, with grace, you would easily stop all movement, not just what was coming at you. You will learn the very basics of understanding your magic, even basic telekinesis must be taught the hard way!”

>THE HARD WAY?!- AH’LL SHOW YOU AH’ CAN USE THIS STUPID HORN!

Furiously, she focused her mind on the log that came at her, getting a good look at it, grunting, her horn ignited in a red aura, that jerkily surrounded the log, and with a burst and exclamation-

>nnYAH! AHA!

The log flew right back into the trees and above the leaves

Was all she yelled as on instinct, she whirled around and lifted herhind legs up to full bucking bronco position, the brief glimpse of the log showed an abundance of moss, and brittle cracks on where it ended, she could shatter the thing with a yell placed kick. Her eys closed as she whipped around, baring her teeth for the impact, and throwing her legs out in a kick-

Thump

She quickly lost balance as her legs met only air, and she toppled backwards, landing flat on her belly with an “Oomph!”

>Aww, the hay?-

She looked up, and to her left, and then to her right.

Unbeknownst to her, were three more logs, caught in mid swing, perilously close to her.

And held in place by a familiar blue aura of magic

Then came the booming voice she should’ve expected to come sooner. She span around and saw

“APPLEJACK! THINE SKILLS IN MAGIC CANNOT BEGIN TO GROW, IF THOU DOES NOT SENSE IT’S CALL TO THEE! THOU MUST FEEL IT ALWAYS WITHIN THEE! BECOME ONE WITH IT’S POWERS! FOR NOW! THOU ART BLIND! ONLY STRIKING OUT AT WHAT THOU CAN SEE!”

>Y’ALL DANG INTERFERING FATASS! THAT COULDA HURT!

“Oh…My dear Apple Princess, don’t you see? All you sensed was what you saw in front of you, with magic you would FEEL the movement around you, and act deftly, with grace, you would easily stop all movement, not just what was coming at you. You will learn the very basics of understanding your magic, even basic telekinesis must be taught the hard way!”

>THE HARD WAY?!- AH’LL SHOW YOU AH’ CAN USE THIS STUPID HORN!

Furiously, she focused her mind on the log that came at her, getting a good look at it, grunting, her horn ignited in a red aura, that jerkily surrounded the log, and with a burst and exclamation-

>nnYAH! AHA!

The log flew right back into the trees and above the leaves

>Y’SEE THAT Y’ALL DUNDERHEADED HOG LICKER! THAT IS HOW AH USE MAH MAGIC! IFFIN SOMETHING SWINGS AT ME AH’LL SWING RIGHT BAC-

Her comeback would’ve been very fitting, seeing as the log she had propelled had already begun it’s descent back to earth, and guided by the centripetal acceleration og the ropes, making it path directly into the exposed rear of Applejack

>-OW!

“Pffft…I mean AHAHAHAHAHAH! APPLEJACK! THERE IS MUCH YOU SHALL LEARN! WITHIN THIS GARDEN THOU WILL FIND MANY CHALLENGES! AND THOU SHALL HAVE THINE MAGICAL CAKE AND EAT IT!”

>Oh…now come on!

“I SHALL SEE TO IT THAT THOU HAVE THE GREATER UNDERSTANDING OF YOUR MAGICS ONCE THY LEAVE OF THIS GARDEN IS TAKEN!”

>…An’ Ah’ just wanted to go for a walk…

"THAT TOO SHALL HAPPEN....after we are done with lessons, NOW GO!

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Sweet note
"13"
'???'
~~~

>ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?

"I don't want to say I told you so, because that would be mean... however, I'm really good at thinking things."

>Wha-who-how-IT AIN'T POSSIBLE!

"Iiiit is."

>It's bits! IT'S BITS! Easy super easy bits! Even bumped it up ta' twenty five percent of the winnings! This has got to be the easiest way to purchase a fricken airship for your kids birthday with money to spare! This don't make no sense!

"Greed Versus Fear."

>HOW!? Greed always wins! Always! Every time!

"Unless they feel like they'll never get work again, and... well, would YOU hire the guy who got the thing that smashed your city a million bits? I think I'd kick in the nuts, and I'm her daughter."

>...THIS IS BULLSHIT!

"Sorry, just how it is."

>...w-well... well then we'll do it! How hard can it be!?

"..."

>...No, really, I'm asking. How hard can this possibly be? I think I just need to go up to them and be like... you're being sued! And then they throw money at you. That rich pony threw money at Slippy when he ran her over with a cart, that seemed to work.

"...Huh... I mean, how hard could it-"

'I will handle it.'

>GAH!
"HOLY SHIT!... Don't be silent for hours on end and then just talk out of nowhere, mom!"

'...'

"Don't you dare-"

'Stay here.'

"GAH!... FUCK Y- where are you going!?"

>Chitty? Chitty, you sure you don't want us to come with? Chitty?.... Chitty?... crap. ...She's probably not going to do anything rash, right?

"...have... have you met her?"

>I don't know why everyone says she's mean, she's really not.

"...So that's a no?"

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Luna"
'Cadence'
[DT]
{Discord}
+???+
~~~~
>Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your host Pinkie Pie! It's during this time that content does matter, but my story's almost done!

The beam dissipate and nothing is there.
"Huzzah! The creature is dead!"

Cadence claps her hooves.
'We did it!'

DT hugs cadence from behind.
[We did it!]

{Yay...aaaand now I'm bored. Looks like my job is done. Mission accomplish. What do I get?}

>An achievement trophy!
She hands Discord a trophy.

{*Gasp* Just what I always wanted.}
Canned Applause
{You like me. You really really like me!}
Roses are thrown.

[Don't mind if I do.]
Eats some roses.

'I can't wait to talk to Rarity about this on our next spa trip.'

>...*GAAAASP* NOOOO I FORGOT ABOUT RARITY! HOW ARE WE GOING TO FIND HER NOW!?

"Rarity?"
Luna's horn glows for a moment.
"She's at your bar."

>To the bar to save Rarity!

~Bar~
As the group enters, they find pieces of cardboard everywhere. Cardboard Fluttershy is seen slashed, Twilight is missing a head, RD is burnt, and AJ has holes punched into her. Rarity sits on a stool, legs crossed, and drinking wine. She's covered in cuts, mane a mess, and her eye is swollen.
+Hello darlings.+

>Whoa Rarity. Are you all right?

+I'll be fine. I can take care of myself. Let's just say, they shouldn't have played with scissors. I hope you don't mine me helping myself to your bar. I really needed it.
Takes a sip of wine.

>No go right ahead. You look like you need it.

+Thank you. Can you leave me alone for a bit. I'm trying to collect myself.+

>Oh, okay. I need to sell my loot anyway. I'll be back so we can share what happened on the show.
They turn to leave.

+Take your time.+
For a brief moment her eyes turn cat-like and her coat turns black, but turns back again.
+I have all I need.+

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

NC
>Dash
"LD"

>Lightning Dust, for your hard work in revealing this conspiracy, I hereby demote you to janitor.

"WHAT!? WHY!?"

>I dunno, something something friendship or whatever. Get scrubbing.

"...anyone know if Fawntaine's hiring?"

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 NC
 >RD
‘Soarin’
“Fleetfoot”

Soarin stood in the office of his captain in full dress uniform. Still and silent as the fuming mare paced back and forth in front of him, her barely controlled rage rolling off of her in waves.

He had been surprised when she called him in separately. More so because she called him first. He hadn’t expected that, figured her first target would be fleetfoot. Then again, today was not exactly going as expected.

Suddenly she stopped and whirled on him, eyes blazing. She started speaking, low and dangerous.

>I have only one question for you and please, speak freely. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!?

He jerked back.

>WHY SOARIN!? WHY!? I THOUGHT I COULD TRUST YOU! DIDN’T WE BOND WHEN YOU GOT HURT!? WHEN I STARTED HERE YOU HAD MY BACK! YOU! WHILE THE OTHERS WERE ALL TRYING TO GET RID OF ME AS FAST AS POSSIBLE YOU ACTUALLY GOT WITH THE PROGRAM!

She stopped, looked down and took a breath.

>I won’t ask what you were doing. The reports are pretty clear on both your actions and objective. But I have to ask…why?

At the last she looked him in the eye, and he saw something unexpected in her eyes. Betrayal.

‘…Ma’am no excuse ma’am’

The way her eyes widened hurt replaced by rage he suddenly realized this was the wrong answer.

>Oh HELL no! You are not some damn rookie who can get away with hiding behind ‘Oh gosh I dun fucked up’! You are a SENIOR wonderbolt and you are going to answer me properly dammit or I swear I will put you in Twilight’s Tube for Medical Experimentation! Now answer my question! WHY DID YOU TRY TO FUCK ME!?

Well…she had given permission to speak freely…

Soarin steeled himself

‘Because you’re a terrible Capitan.’

>EXCUSE ME!?

‘You’re bad at your job. You’re never around anymore, you need help just to get the paperwork done, the team was down to a handful before APPLEJACK inspired a lot of ponies to join and you basically got handed the job because you’re friends with the princesses. Spitfire for all her faults was HERE. She did training, knew her people, paid attention….we never could have pulled this on her.’

>She ALSO completely ignored her administrative duties to the point I am STILL one year later, finding old forms she just didn’t bother to do, KNOWINGLY IGNORED a rampant drug problem in her ranks, and allowed this MILITARY UNIT to become little more than a group of CELEBRITY ATHLETES! And before you say ‘at least we had a high performing team’ you didn’t. Because the bolts aren’t here just to fly fast and look good. We are Equestria’s air force. We are here to hurt ponies and break stuff and you weren’t doing that.

‘Ok, so…maybe we had some problems! There were still tons of better qualified ponies than deserved that seat more! Plenty of bolts could have come in and done better than you have!’

>Really? Because I have, in less than a year, cleaned up the drug problem, gotten us armed, got us back to flying actual combat formations, and made several efforts into recruitment, all while working on the Gordian Charlie Foxtrot that is the red tape this team goes through! You’re upset I’m never around? Never train? Never lead? SOMEONE has to administrate and it sure as hell isn’t any of you right now! Can you say any of the previous bolts were ever going to do even half of that if they got this chair?

‘…’

>That’s what I thought.

‘At least they would actually be HERE. Instead of just an absentee Captain who treats this job like a trophy or a toy she can pick up and put down whenever she wants!

>Absentee? What because I took a day to go play a computer game!?

‘You’re always running off! You’re almost never around for training anymore, you barely pay attention, you weren’t with us during cordyceps…we are clearly you’re second priority!

>Oh! Right! Because it makes no sense for me to link up with the other ‘ELEMENTS OF HARMONY’ who have saved this country on multiple occasions and instead stay with my team which has failed to do much of anything of use the past several major deployments including against Chitania and at Party Land when I was very much leading this team! Many of whom actively RAN AWAY despite being in a military unit!
‘I didn’t run.’

>No, but it’s pretty clear which team is more effective, and if you didn’t know, all SIX of us need to be together for it to work! It would be negligent to my duties as the element of loyalty NOT to go join them!

‘A good point…except the elements are back in the tree now aren’t they? Even all together, you’re just the sum of your parts. The others have mostly moved in to their other duties like law, science, or whatever rarity is in charge of, but you’re more concerned with having fun than being a commander!’

>Fun! Ha! Yes, what’s more fun than trying to wade through the massive pile of negligently ignored administrative bullshit that, from what I can tell was not merely considered a nonpriority for Spits, but the last THREE CAPTAINS before me! Fun, fun fun!

‘Don’t you get a lot of help with that now though?’

>You know what? You try it for a day! See how far you get solo or even with help! I’m trying dammit!

‘Oh, well if you’re trying…’

>WATCH IT! You’re in deep enough already mister!

‘Yeah, fine hide behind the position your BEST FRIEND gave you over ponies who had been working on this team FOR YEARS. Go ahead! Use your power! Throw me off the team!

>I DON’T WANT TO THROW YOU OFF THE TEAM YOU DOLT! YOU’RE THE LAST VETERAN I’VE GOT WHO’S REMOTELY USEFUL! OR SO I THOUGHT!

They both paused winded from their shouting match.

>…dammit. This isn’t what I called you in here for.

‘Why did you call me in here? I mean we both know how this ends, what’s the point of dragging it out like this by talking about it? By meeting separately? Both me and Fleets are clearly gone…are you just getting off on savoring the final destruction of the old ‘bolts? Is this catharsis for how we disappointed you? Didn’t live up to your vaunted childhood dreams?’

There was a lot of bitterness in his voice.

>I JUST said I didn’t want to fire you.

‘What choice do you have? Its’ hit the papers by now. You can’t just ‘let it slide, do better next time’.’

>Oh believe me, this is not going to ‘slide’ there will be consequences.

‘So what is it you’re trying to accomplish then, because besides annihilating my old team, I just don’t see it.’

Dash sighed and wandered over to her desk where there was a small picture frame.

>Catch.

She tossed it to him.

It was an autographed photo of the top of the previous wonderbolts ‘class’. Some of them he had the pleasure of serving with when he was just a rookie, some of the best and most inspiring flyers he’d ever met. They’d taught him the most important things he knew.

>Soarin. Being a bolt has been my dream since I was just a filly. I finally get here, and it is an unmitigated nightmare.

She shook her head.

>Being captain of this team was my dream….resurrecting it is my reality. I’m doing my best, but it’s not enough and now with 18 and AJ helping I’m starting to learn…I can’t do it alone.

He looked up at her.

>You’re the only one of the old guard left who really knew what it was to be a bolt. What this team can be. Should be. My goal is to build the bolts back to what they once were…and more. I think you share that goal. Am I wrong?

He looked away.

‘My team is gone.’

>…Yeah. Yeah they are, and they’re not coming back. But most are gone because they shouldn’t have been here in the first place.

That hurt to hear. It was technically true, but they had still been friends. He missed them.

>Others…I drove away through my own mistakes. I’ll own that.

She looked over to a maid uniform, crumpled in the corner, and idly wondered why she hadn’t burned the damn thing yet.

>But I still believe in this team. In what it can stand for, if we can just get it right this time.

‘We?’

>Yes we. From what I’ve seen before all this mess, you and spits were the only ones who really got it. She’s gone now, but you’re still here and I need you to help train all these rookies we just got. To show them what we can be. Not just a Unit. A family. Not just an Air Force. A force for good. I need someone to hammer that into them. I think you’re the best one to do it.

Soarin looked at the picture again. Then walked over and set it back in its’ place on the desk.

‘The ones who left…if they cleaned up their act, came back, worked for it…

>…I have no problem with that. But they haven’t. It’s been a year now. I don’t think they’re coming back.

He nodded.

‘And what about fleetoot?’

>What ABOUT fleetfoot? She’s gone. Full stop.

‘Ah.’

>You have a problem with this? Seriously? She was one the biggest reasons the bolts were brought down in the first place!

‘Maybe. But she’s also the only other veteran left aside from me.’

>And if she was useful and not a massive pain in my ass and hadn’t orchestrated this whole thing I might care. I don’t.

‘But I do. You said you wanted this team to be what it could be. Not just a unit but a family. Do you really expect me to just ignore it when a member of my family is in trouble? You want me? I want her.’

Dash huffed in response.

>What makes you think you’re in any position to bargain here!?

‘You got a line of veteran bolts who understand what this team could be just lying around somewhere I missed?’

>NO! But I also don’t exactly get a lot of opportunities to get rid of that pain in the ass! You’re asking a hell of a lot here! You have a record in good standing, she doesn’t! What message will it send to the rookies if I just let her keep going!?

‘I’m not saying you let her off free and clear. There have to be consequences, I get that. But the bolts…to me, to her, they’re everything. Our whole lives, our identities.’

>Healthy.

‘Heh, yeah. I’m just saying, if you want me, you can do whatever you want to us, but you keep both of us.’

>You realize if your positions were reversed she would throw you under the bus in a heartbeat right? Then hop in the cab and run you over herself? Then throw it in reverse and back over you with both axles?

‘…Yeah. Yeah I do.’

Dash began pacing back and forth in front of him again thinking it over.

>…What if she quits? Will you stay on?

‘…Yes. If it’s her choice, I won’t leave you high and dry like that.’

>And if she quits because she can’t endure the punishment?

‘…Still. I’ll stick by the team.’

She sighed in frustration.

>Dammit Soarin. You see this? This right here? What you’re doing? This is what I want you to teach them! This is what I want on my team! But why can’t you just leave her behind!?

‘Would you if she were your friend, element of loyalty?’

>GAH!

She resumed pacing.

>…
‘…’

>Promise me. Promise me that if she can’t take it, if she quits on her own, you stay. Promise me.

He paused for a moment. Chewing it over. He loved this team, but ff she could punish them any way she wanted, they’d be left wide open…

‘Will you only punish us as the regs allow?’

>You asking if I’m going to shove you in a maid outfit? I don’t like repeating past mistakes.

He nodded.

‘…Ok. I promise.’

>Then I suggest you prepare your anus, because this will be going in dry.

Soaring swallowed.

‘Ummm….Metaphorically right? …Right?’

Dash grinned silently in response as the color left his face.
***
Fleetfoot entered the office when called in her best dress uniform. And locked it up at attention in the middle of the room.

She was prepared to beg. She was prepared to grovel. Heck she was even prepared to actually fall in line after all this, just so long as she could keep being a bolt.

…She wondered what dash’s thongs tasted like. Spicy? Rainbows were supposed to be spicy she recalled.

>Hello Fleetfoot.

“Ma’am, I would just like to say-“

>REST!

Her ass clapped shut.

>You know. You’ve been a pain in my ass all year. But I’ve finally got you. I’ve got you and there isn’t anything you can do about it. You’re mine.
“Ma’am please-“

>I SAID REST! I’ve been waiting for this for some time y’know. I want to…savor, this moment.

Fleetfoot began to tear up. Anger welling up within her. She knew what was coming.

>Sadly, this isn’t quite the moment I wanted.

…What?

>You see, this guy…

She gestured to Saorin…who looked oddly pale.

>Is actually useful, and astonishingly loyal to your worthless hide.

Hope welled up.

“You mean…?”

>Were I you I’d get on my knees and thank him however he asks.

“I’m still a bolt? I’m still a…YEEAHHHHH!”

(yeah!) They heard faintly through the wall

Fleetfoot jumped into the air for joy, landing she looked over to Soarin with a massive grin on her face.

>Yes PRIVATE. You’re still a bolt.

Her smile fell.

“P-Private?”

The grin on dash’s face made her blood run cold.

>Yes. You see, You’re still getting punished, however I see fit, and I’ll even keep it within regulations this time. No reason to repeat old mistakes is there?

The blue mare said wandering over to her desk and withdrawing from it a massive tome which landed with a mighty boom on the desk as it rattled under the weight.

>And under the regs, the punishment for conspiracy to remove your commanding officer is…oh my, anything up to life in prison. Execution is wartime, guess you’re lucky this exercise in stupidity didn’t kick one off eh?

Fleetfoot swallowed and locked it up at attention. She had a feeling this was going to hurt.

>So basically, I can’t fire you if I want to keep him, but otherwise your ass is mine. However, want it, whenever I want it, for as long as I want it. Do you understand?

“Ma’am yes ma’am!”

>Good.

She purred.

>To begin with you will be reduced in rank to private, your years of service reset to zero and your pay adjusted to match.

Fleet balked.

>But wait! There’s more! Due to your insubordination I’m going to be slashing your pay in half!

Half a buck private’s pay!? You couldn’t rent a room in your parent’s house on that!

>Hm…I guess this means you’ll need to move out of your expensive Canterlot apartment then won’t it? Don’t worry, I’ve got a fabulous closet on base all picked out for you! It even comes with a lumpy mattress and single footlocker to store everything you’ll need to do your job. Probably not much for personal effects though. Oh well.

Fleetfoot stared straight ahead, remaining at attention.

>Also, meals will of course be provided at the dining hall on base. You remember where that is right?

Fleetfoot whimpered. No one ate at the chow hall after training. Everything there was basically inedible. There were rumors that it was used as a secret training measure to wash out those rookies with weak constitutions.

>Also, you are going to be suspended without pay and placed on restriction for the next month, confined to in barracks quarters or the bathing facility. Bad news, the hot water pipe burst unexpectedly so it only has cold for the moment.

>Furthermore, your duties will need to be…adjusted slightly. You will no longer be in any kind of command or in any position considered ‘Senior’. You are grounded from any combat flying except in cases of absolute emergency. You are not allowed to participate in any public facing activites. No PR, no races, no official functions, nothing. You are also not allowed to have any contact with the rookies more than is absolutely necessary, I don’t want you influencing them.

Fleetfoot swallowed hard. But maintained her bearing.

>Last, I’d feel just awful if I didn’t provide you with something to pass your free time so I’ll make sure you get a complimentary copy of the only boardgame I know

“no…”

Dash’s grin grew wider.

>Monopony.

“You monster!”

>That’s not how you spell Commanding Officer.

“I won’t stand for this! I’m leaving! Come on soarin”

Fleet foot spun on her hoof and walked for the door.

But didn’t hear steps behind her.

She turned and saw him unmoved. Dahs smiling even wider than before somehow.

“Soarin?”

>Please go through that door. Please oh please oh please go through that door.

‘Don’t do it.’

>Quiet you! Please…keep walking.

“…What’s going on?”

‘If you quit of your own accord…I stay. I’m sorry, I promised.’
>Thought I told you to button it!

“I see…well why not? Why shouldn’t I leave?”

>Oh yeah, I see this going great for you. Lots of job opportunities on the market for someone with your skills. Will you be needing an honest reference?
The rainbow maned mare smiled predatorily.

“…I have reconsidered”

>Damn!

Dash’s face fell. She had almost had it all.

“May we be dismissed?”

Dash snorted.

>You are. I still need to speak with Soarin

Fleetfoot nodded and left
***
‘So…what now?’

>Well for starters, you are getting the same she is except you’re only being busted down to Sergeant and you’ll be in charge of training the rookies. So sergeant’s half-pay, nothing public facing, no combat, and for the next month you live here with cold showers and no pay at all.

‘I see.’

>You will of course, have the opportunity to have these conditions lifted as you prove to me I can trust you.

‘And if I can’t?

>Then I suggest you get comfortable.

He nodded.

‘What about her? Can she prove herself?’

Dash sighed.

>Soarin? Seriously? It would take a miracle for me to ever, EVER, want to give her another chance. She made this bed, she can sleep in it.

He clenched his jaw.

‘Understood. Permission to leave?’
>Not quite yet. There’s one last thing I need from you.

‘Ma’am?’

>I’m…not perfect in this job yet. That thing I asked you to hammer into the rookies? Sometimes, I may need you to hammer it into me too. This job isn’t a secondary priority to me.

‘Ma’am….’

She cocked an eyebrow at his trailing off.

>Something on your mind? Because if so, out with it. I’d rather you actually use that pair I see dangling back there and talk to me instead of running around behind my back and nearly starting a war.

‘I won’t ask you to ease up on fleetfoot much. But a private’s half pay? With no improvement ever? You’re basically forcing her out just through pay.’
>GAH! This again!? Look, you already saved her job, what exactly do you want from me!?

‘Just lifting it to full pay if she can keep on track. Nothing else. Just a living wage.’

 Dash sighed tiredly. This whole day had been exhausting. The game had been enough in and of itself but this frackas on top of it? She just wanted it over with.

>Fine. If she can keep out of trouble for…I dunno 6 months? I’ll grant her full pay. But that’s it. Her getting to keep calling herself a bolt is a travesty already. She’s not getting more than that! And I swear if she gives me a reason, just one reason, ANY reason, her ass is gone. No more games! Anything else!?

‘…No ma’am’

>Dismissed!

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________