To the town of Redwood Run rode a stranger one fine day
Offered her services to a fellow who was having a bad day,
used her powers of repair, for the fellow’s car had made a slip
Then stranger went on her way with Real Ass Sword on her hip,
Real Ass Sword on her hip,

It was early in the morning when she strode into the town
She took down a couple of crooks, before heading to the Sheriff’s
She ended up teaming up with a convict, With the face of a gerbil
Cause she was here to do some business with the Real Ass Sword on her hip,
Real Ass Sword on her hip,

In this town there lurked an outlaw by the name of Zora Salazar
She had taken up many bounties and those many bounties were claimed
She was vicious and a killer, though she only stood six foot three
And the notches on her pistols were handcrafted and custom made,
handcrafted and custom made,

Now the stranger started talkin' made it plain to folks around
Was an Officer of the law, wouldn't be too long in town
She was here to take down an outlaw or maybe even some more
Ands most importantly she was after Arsene Amulet,
After Arsene Amulet,

Wasn't long before this amulet end up in the hands of Salazar
And with hunt being completed she set her eyes upon the convict
Many times she’d had tried to catch him, Many times he had escaped,
But this time she was gonna catch him with he’s epithet of goldbrick,
epithet of goldbrick,

Now the morning passed so quickly and it was time for them to meet
It was twenty past eleven when they rode out into the forest
with Zora’s epithet being so broken, the Officer struck a deal,
that no epithets were allowed in this duel to the death,
duel to the death,

There were  more then twenty  bullets unfrozen
When the duel had begun
And the wit of the convict is still talked about today
When he smashed Zora’s gun, it threw her into a fit
And She ended up using her epithet trying to cut them down,
trying to cut them down,

It was only through trickery that the two managed survive
only then did Zora admit that she had  been fairly beat
Oh, she might have won duel if she hadn’t let her temper slip
When she tried to match the officer with a Real Ass Sword on her hip,
Real Ass Sword on her hip

Real Ass Sword, Real Ass  Goddamn Sword,
Oh she tried to match the officer with a Real Ass Sword on her hip,
Real Ass Sword on her hip