Spongebob Gaiden: Memetic Mutation

Spongebob Gaiden: Memetic Mutation

It only took one needle.
One used needle shoved in the dumpster behind the Krusty Krab. Looks like someone doesn’t know hazardous waste protocols, even though it wasn’t the blood that caused the epidemic.
It was a tiny bit of snail shit. Almost microscopic, even to sea life. And of course, with needles, there’s always someone looking to get their fix.
And Spongebob was the one that day. Spongebob had recently gotten into both Breaking Bad and the drugs it showed. And today, he NEEDED it.
Digging through the dumpster cautiously, a glint of something shiny caught his eye. His heart beat wildly in his chest. Yes, that’s the glimmer of a needle alright.
He wasted no time pulling down his pants and shoving the needle, which he had filled with the crystal blue, into his spongy buttocks.
Yeah, he’s into meth ass. Tell your friends.
And thus began Patient 0 of the Krussy Epidemic.
“Listen, I just made a few memes! I knew nothing of this epidemic…thing!” a mousy girl struggled against restraints, as two women looked at her.
“But what about those stories?” one of the women, tall with long brown hair, inquired, adjusting the tie on her suit.
“We have evidence of what we have named the SpongeQuads and the Spongebob Gaiden coming from your area of residence.” the other woman, a slightly shorter woman with dark purple hair, scoffed.
“Wait…stories?” the mousy girl said, confusedly. “Dude, I haven’t written anything for ages, especially not fanfic. And especially especially not Spongebob smut fic. The only remotely smutty thing I’ve written was Deidre the Sexually Active Baker.”
“Ah yes, the classic.” the purple-haired woman deadpanned.
“Don’t be rude, Nikki.” her co-interrogator whispered sharply.
“Please, Crystal, do you seriously think that Ms. Flareth here didn’t write these fics. We’ve gotten brainscans, chatlogs, everything!” Nikki yelled, as Flareth began crying softly. “It’s obvious she’s the cause of Bikini Bottom’s rapid decline!”
“Normally, I’d agree with you but this girl doesn’t look like the one who’d go destroying universes willy-nilly.” Crystal pondered to herself. “Plus she wasn’t the one who created the Krussy.
And I relished the fear on her face as she finally realized that Little Miss Nobody didn’t write the “fanfics”. Didn’t make that “Plankton is one thicc bih” meme. I never expected them to find me in this little meat suit. Would’ve thought they’d still be looking at that Tortellini fellow I inhabited for most of my life.
Nah man, I have bigger fish to fry. Bigger targets to hit. I set the prompt,  I implanted the idea, and I made her do it.
It’s kinda hilarious how WELL I pulled it off too. Apparently my little fanfics and memes were just her style. She should be glad that, besides that, I let her keep her lucidity.
Now, let’s go back to ol’ Mr. Krabs here. Normally this would be the place where that fleshbag would say something like “Mr. Krabs hadn’t always been that thicc” and then keep on sticking references to “Shiny” from the Disney film Moana. But I’m not that villain song guzzling fangirl.
I’m Kyabetsu, baby.
But right now, he’s all holed up in his house crying as everyone is trying to get in to see his…”krussy”. I admit I was having an off day when I brought the virus into being, but I’m glad it penetrated the humans as well.
How’s that for Memetic Mutation?
A brick flies through his window, and several fish pile in, ravenous for the Krussy. They can only think of the Krussy. See it. Smell it. Feel it. Nothing matters except for the Krussy.
Having a zombie army is cool, right?
Parting is such sweet sorrow though because I just heard gunshots and I’m pretty sure it’s not from the zombies. Someone escaped the thrall and…oh, it’s that squirrel girl. She took the crab and ran. Ah well, c'est la vie, I suppose. Wait, crap, guess I was in that meat suit longer than I thought.
Guess I better manipulate things some more. Au revoir!