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- It seems today that all you see Is violence in movies and sex on TV But where are those good old-fashioned values On which we used to rely? Lucky there's a family guy Lucky there's a man who positively can do all the things that make us Laugh and cry He's a family guy (TV) That concludes our special half-hour salute to the past 1,000 years.
- We leave you with a look back at some of those we've lost this millennium.
- Kevin asked me to Quagmire's millennium party.
- I am so psyched.
- There's nothing like someone else's party.
- You never have to clean up the mess.
- Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun, hey! Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun, hey! Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun, hey! Well, looks like someone's going to a big party tonight.
- You should pick up a chicken-strip party pack for all your friends.
- Here's a coupon.
- Look, pal, I don't take coupons from giant chickens.
- Not after last time.
- Oh, yeah, and that nice chicken outside gave me this coupon.
- I'm sorry.
- This has expired.
- You son of a - I'm gonna need these by Friday.
- - Will that give us enough time to? Chicken gave me a bad coupon.
- - Some other time, pal.
- - There won't be any other time.
- The world is gonna end at midnight.
- - Y2K.
- - Are you sellin' chicken or sex jelly? Haven't you heard? At midnight, every computer in the world is gonna fail.
- Planes will fall out of the sky and all the world's nuclear weapons will explode, - Annihilating the entire planet.
- - No! Silly rabbit.
- Trix are for kids.
- Damned long ears, tryin' to take Easter away from Jesus.
- What were you sayin'? Hey, Peter, in case you didn't know, a balloon tied to a mailbox is the international symbol for "party over here!" Forget the party.
- The world's gonna end.
- Y2K.
- I heard it from a chicken-man.
- Oh, Peter, you are the height of just-too-muchery.
- Laugh, but when you die, you'll have to go to heaven.
- And you know what? I bet you run into those two dead bailiff ladies from Night Court.
- And you won't know which one is which.
- And it'll be really awkward.
- So bite me.
- - Can you help me with these damned studs? - Aren't you a little overdressed? Oh, actually, I'm just stopping off at Quagmire's.
- There's a benefit gala at the Boston Pops tonight, and well, I'm trying to nail the flautist.
- Oh, Stewie, you're adorable.
- Yes, yes, I rather like the sash.
- But do the Huggies make my ass look big? Peter, come on.
- You've had 1,000 years to get ready for this party.
- It always takes him so long to get dressed.
- Peter, we're gonna be late for my cousin's wedding.
- Read more: https://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/view_episode_scripts.php?tv-show=family-guy&episode=s02e03
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