[Classic FR] Literal

>Day Literal Meanings in Equestria.
>Wake up.
>You are Anon, apprentice witchdoctor and potential Scooby Doo villain.
>A beautiful black and white horse yawns and stretches next to you in bed.
>Also, you're sleeping with Zecora.
>Not just sexually.
>Like, as in, you live in her hut.
>The townspeople didn't take kindly to strange creatures roaming about in their midst.
>So they did what they do with every weird thing they find.
>They chased you into the Everfree Forest.
>Eh, it could be worse.
>You lean over and kiss Zecora on the forehead.
"Morning, babe."
>Zecora coos. "Every morning with you is a good one./ But let's get moving and get some work done."
>You flick her on the snout.
"Zecora, you know you don't have to pull the whole rhyming thing with me, right? I won't let anyone in on your secret."
>She breathes a relaxed sigh and smiles. "Tah mate, it's dead 'ard 'avin' te be some other pleb tweeny fore seven, ya know?"
>You scratch her behind the ears and get up to start your morning ritual.
>Walking over to the large cauldron in the other room, you grab some chicken feathers, a bag of non descript seeds, and some zinc.
>Throwing them into the boiling pot, you slowly stir the mixture and chant softly.
"Half Life 3. Portal 3. Left4Dead3. Team Fortress 3."
>"Can ya calm down wiv that paki speak, mate?"
"But broken dreams are the best fuel for incantations. You taught me that."
>The container before you erupts in a plume of smoke.
>Once it clears, you are clean and hairless.
>Morning ritual complete, it's time to-
>A knock at the door interrupts you.

>Zecora immediately takes on her alternate ponysona. "Anon, would you please go get the door?/"
>You walk over and open it.
>In front of you stands Butterthighs with a fresh blush on her face.
>Zecora peeks around to get a look at her visitor. "Oh, it's just the yellow whore..."
>She turns around to carry on her business inside. "Hurry and send her on her way./ We have aphrodisiacs with which to play."
>Fluttershy's back legs twitch at the mention of sexual intercourse with you.
>She looks up at you and awkwardly smiles. "Oh h-hi Anon. Fancy m-meeting you here..."
"Fluttershy. I live here. You know that. It's the only structure in the Everfree Forest."
>She looks away and stammers, "I know, b-but-"
"And you also know that I'm with Zecora. And we're very happy, thank you."
>You're about to close the door when she quickly digs into her saddlebag and produces a small human-like figure bound in and made of straw.
>"I just wanted to know if... i-if this was your fetish."
>You take the figure in your hands and examine it thoroughly.
>Cloth scrawled over with ornate drawings cover its head and a few limbs.
>Its mystical power surges through your body.
>The gods would be upset if you were to lose this again.
"Yes, this is my fetish. Thank you for bringing it back."
>You look down to Fluttershy who beams back up at you.
"You can go now."
>She looks away but then back to you. "H-How about a reward rut?"
>You channel the power of the doll in your hand to punt Fluttershy into the distance and slam the door of the hut.
>Fucking Fluttershy.