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Karpy & Johz

Johz
Jan 24th, 2013
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  1. [14:48:31] <@Karp> wait a second.. when the hell did johz get here? :P
  2. [14:48:36] <@Wop> every channel you are in you need to say hi
  3. [14:48:41] <@Wop> wait Johz is here
  4. [14:48:47] <@Wop> when did that happen
  5. [14:48:56] <@Karp> [Jan:23::13:35:58] * Johz (kvirc@owp188a.halls.manchester.ac.uk) has joined #mordor
  6. [14:49:00] <@Karp> hes at university!
  7. [14:49:06] <@Wop> in Manchester!
  8. [14:49:09] <@Karp> near me!
  9. [14:49:22] <+DYP> run Johz!!!!
  10. [14:49:24] <@Wop> i'm going to manchester soon....
  11. [14:49:30] <@Karp> how soon?
  12. [14:49:43] <@Wop> month
  13. [14:49:48] <@Karp> why?
  14. [14:49:54] <+DYP> see Johz
  15. [14:50:00] <@Wop> see Johz
  16. [14:50:01] <@Wop> :P
  17. [14:50:06] <@Wop> and Madjack
  18. [14:50:14] <@Karp> oh cool
  19. [14:50:19] <@Karp> i didnt want to come anyway
  20. [14:50:21] <madjack> i'm not in manchester
  21. [14:50:23] <@Wop> good
  22. [14:50:41] <+Joshua> Lol
  23. [14:51:13] <@Karp> i think we scared johz
  24. [14:51:39] <Johz> Wait, sorry.
  25. [14:52:01] <+DYP> sush your scared
  26. [14:52:43] <Johz> Yes.
  27. [14:52:44] <Johz> No.
  28. [14:52:48] <Johz> Why am I scared?
  29. [14:52:53] <Johz> Because I'm near Karp?
  30. [14:52:54] <Johz> Shit.
  31. [14:53:01] <@Karp> ;_;
  32. [14:53:01] Johz is now very scared.
  33. [14:53:17] <Johz> Sorry, Karp...  :P
  34. [14:53:20] Johz hugs Karp
  35. [14:53:23] <@Karp> too late
  36. [14:53:33] <@Karp> can i kick him now? :P
  37. [14:53:40] <Johz> It's never too late to keep our relationship alive, Karp.
  38. [14:53:44] <Johz> For the kids, at least.
  39. [14:53:46] <+Joshua> I am scared of Johz... =(
  40. [14:54:01] <@Karp> the civil union is off!
  41. [14:54:07] <@Karp> luna will be thrilled
  42. [14:54:16] <Johz> Hush, Joshy.  You're only scared of me because you know I'll menace you if you touch WZE.
  43. [14:54:27] <Johz> You mean, you don't want me any more?
  44. [14:54:34] <Johz> The times we shared together, man!
  45. [14:54:54] <Johz> I thought, you know, that you really wanted it.  That you were trying to make it work.
  46. [14:54:57] <Johz> And then this happens?
  47. [14:55:01] <Johz> You bastard.
  48. [14:55:02] Johz cries
  49. [14:55:13] <@Karp> its not my fault!
  50. [14:55:19] <@Karp> you had to go and ruin it
  51. [14:55:20] <Johz> Then who's fault is it?
  52. [14:55:26] <@Karp> errm
  53. [14:55:27] <Johz> You're seeing someone, aren't you.
  54. [14:55:29] <Johz> You are.
  55. [14:55:34] <@Karp> no im not!
  56. [14:55:41] <Johz> Admit it, Karp.  Admit it before I find out and hate you even more.
  57. [14:55:46] <+DYP> and then you go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like....
  58. [14:55:50] <Johz> And think of the kids, man!
  59. [14:55:52] <@Karp> youve been canoodling with luna all this time and i knew it
  60. [14:55:59] <@Karp> and i didnt do anything
  61. [14:56:01] <Johz> It was not like that, and you know it.
  62. [14:56:06] <Johz> We're friends, man.
  63. [14:56:09] <Johz> We're friends.
  64. [14:56:10] <@Karp> those party rings you shared!?
  65. [14:56:13] <@Karp> that was nothing?
  66. [14:56:26] <@Karp> dont lie to me, i deserve better.
  67. [14:56:27] <Johz> It was nothing like the party rings we shared.
  68. [14:56:36] <Johz> We shared party rings and it meant stuff.
  69. [14:56:52] <Johz> Come back, Karpy.  Let me give you a second chance.
  70. [14:56:57] <Johz> I've got party rings...
  71. [14:57:03] <@Karp> no, its too late.
  72. [14:57:07] <@Karp> youve broken my heart
  73. [14:57:09] <Johz> Fine then.
  74. [14:57:13] <@Karp> and i cant trust you any more.
  75. [14:57:13] <Johz> Be like that.
  76. [14:57:22] <Johz> But I'm taking the kids, and I'm taking the dog.
  77. [14:57:26] <Johz> And the house.
  78. [14:57:28] <+Joshua> Karp left you for DYP...
  79. [14:57:30] <Johz> We did have a house, didn't we?
  80. [14:57:33] <Johz> For DYP!?
  81. [14:57:36] <Johz> You fool!
  82. [14:57:41] <@Karp> if you count that shed we hide in
  83. [14:57:42] <Johz> Me, for /that/?
  84. [14:57:55] <@Karp> he understands me
  85. [14:58:00] <+DYP> you can have him back, he snores
  86. [14:58:01] <+jahmurai> As long as its not joshua, be glad.
  87. [14:58:02] <Johz> I understand you, Karpy.
  88. [14:58:26] <@Karp> but i cant do that to myself
  89. [14:58:27] <Johz> <+jahmurai> As long as its not joshua, be glad.  <--  Pfft.  I'm safe from Joshua, don't worry.  :P
  90. [14:58:33] <@Karp> i cant put myself through that again
  91. [14:58:45] <Johz> You can.
  92. [14:58:49] <Johz> You can, if I help you.
  93. [14:59:00] <Johz> We can put ourselves through it together, and come out stronger on the other side.
  94. [14:59:11] <+Joshua> LOL
  95. [14:59:13] <@Karp> how do i know youre not gonna be eating other assorted snacks with luna when i turn my back!?
  96. [14:59:23] <Johz> You don't.
  97. [14:59:29] <Johz> You're just going to have to trust me.
  98. [14:59:39] <Johz> Do you remember what we said when we had that Civil Partnership?
  99. [14:59:52] <Johz> How we would trust each other through thick and thin?
  100. [14:59:54] <@Karp> 'Wtf?'
  101. [15:00:00] <Johz> That as well, but...
  102. [15:00:19] <@Karp> i... just dont know anymore
  103. [15:00:30] <Johz> I want to trust you, Karpy.  I really want to.  Will you just let me?
  104. [15:00:55] <@Karp> you still think this is my fault!?
  105. [15:01:00] Karp throws a chair at Johz
  106. [15:01:06] <@Karp> get out!
  107. [15:01:13] <Johz> Fine then.
  108. [15:01:14] <+jahmurai> I think joshua is atm holding a tissue and enjoys this docu soap
  109. [15:01:20] <Johz> No, properly, fine then.
  110. [15:01:22] <Johz> I'll leave.
  111. [15:01:27] <@Karp> good riddance
  112. [15:01:31] <Johz> Just like how you've left me in the lurch all those times.
  113. [15:01:32] <@Karp> this is the best decision ive made
  114. [15:01:37] <@Karp> ive been holding on for too long
  115. [15:01:47] <@Karp> trying to convince myself you loved me
  116. [15:01:48] <Johz> You know, Karpy, I'm glad we're apart, because it makes everything so much simpler.
  117. [15:01:50] <@Karp> but you never did
  118. [15:01:52] <+Joshua> Id leave karp for luna....
  119. [15:02:01] <@Karp> fuck you joshua
  120. [15:02:03] <Johz> You're a bastard and we both know it, but I didn't want to believe it.
  121. [15:02:05] <+Joshua> Lol
  122. [15:02:07] <+jahmurai> would YOU? :O
  123. [15:02:11] Karp throws a pan at Johz
  124. [15:02:14] <Johz> Ow!
  125. [15:02:17] <+Joshua> Karp you are not my type
  126. [15:02:20] <@Karp> GET OUT
  127. [15:02:26] <Johz> Alright, one more thing, and I'm calling the police.
  128. [15:02:26] <@Karp> YOURE NEVER HURTING ME AGAIN
  129. [15:02:29] <+jahmurai> you know you can kick karp
  130. [15:02:34] <Johz> This is still domestic abuse.
  131. [15:02:44] <@Karp> ill give you domestic abusse
  132. [15:02:50] Karp throws the TV at Johz
  133. [15:02:51] <+Joshua> Lol
  134. [15:03:06] You have left channel #mordor: I'm quitting before he dares kick me, low-life son of a...
  135. ### Log session terminated at Wed Jan 23 15:03:37 2013 ###
  136. ### Log session started at Wed Jan 23 15:03:37 2013 ###
  137. [15:03:37] Johz [kvirc@owp188a.halls.manchester.ac.uk] has joined #mordor
  138. [15:03:41] jahmurai throws joshua to Karp
  139. [15:03:44] <Johz> I've left my stuff.
  140. [15:03:46] <Johz> Dammit.
  141. [15:03:46] Joshua punches Karp
  142. [15:03:50] jahmurai takes a picture of joshua and karp
  143. [15:03:59] jahmurai shows the icture to johz
  144. [15:04:00] Karp avoids Johz
  145. [15:04:05] <Johz> They look good together.
  146. [15:04:09] Joshua stabs Jah
  147. [15:04:11] <Johz> They suit each other.  >.>
  148. [15:04:11] <@Karp> better than we ever did
  149. [15:04:11] <+DYP> This week on Mordor Street. Will Johz and Karp fix their relationship or will is it the end for our handsome couple? And Wop opens up a new cafe in direct competition with Jah's restaurant.
  150. [15:04:20] <+jahmurai> i know you do joshua, its not the first time
  151. [15:04:39] jahmurai bakes a pizza
  152. [15:04:44] jahmurai throws an egg to wop
  153. [15:04:46] <Johz> Bom, bom, bom, bombombombom (doo doo doo doo dooo, dooo, doooo...)
  154. [15:04:58] Karp throws Johz's socks on the fire
  155. [15:05:06] <Johz> Keep them.
  156. [15:05:14] <Johz> I always hated the socks you bought me.
  157. [15:05:29] <+jahmurai> I think he sewed them
  158. [15:05:31] Karp in a blind rage runs at Johz with a knife
  159. [15:05:46] <Johz> You had a civil partnership, but you've got no sense of colour coordination, what kind of person are you?
  160. [15:05:48] jahmurai holds karp
  161. [15:05:48] Johz ducks
  162. [15:05:59] jahmurai throws karp to joshua
  163. [15:05:59] <@Karp> you bastard!
  164. [15:06:04] <Johz> I'm calling the police, man.
  165. [15:06:10] <Johz> This has gone on long enough.
  166. [15:06:12] <@Karp> do whatever youd like
  167. [15:06:16] <Johz> This abuse I recieve from you.
  168. [15:06:31] <Johz> It hurts.  There's no other word for it.
  169. [15:06:31] <@Karp> you made me do it
  170. [15:06:35] <+jahmurai> Dyp can do the voice over
  171. [15:06:37] <@Karp> you and your selfish actions
  172. [15:06:41] <Johz> I made you do it?  /I/ did?
  173. [15:06:48] <Johz> You cheated on me with Joshua!
  174. [15:06:52] <Johz> With /Joshua/!
  175. [15:06:52] <@Karp> you DROVE me to it
  176. [15:06:59] <Johz> How do you think I feel when you do that?
  177. [15:07:00] <+Joshua> Fuck that
  178. [15:07:03] <@Karp> the abuse... i couldnt stand it
  179. [15:07:16] <Johz> And then you have the audacity to abuse me because of something you've done?
  180. [15:07:18] <@Karp> i needed someone who would liste, understand and heal me
  181. [15:07:22] <+Joshua> If I were gay Id not shack up with Karp
  182. [15:07:27] <Johz> And you chose Josh?
  183. [15:07:31] <+Joshua> No
  184. [15:07:31] <@Karp> dont kid yourself johz
  185. [15:07:39] <@Karp> you were an awful husband
  186. [15:07:39] <Johz> Well at least I know that I'm better than that.
  187. [15:07:42] <@Karp> and you know it
  188. [15:07:49] <+Joshua> Karps mom is a delight
  189. [15:08:08] <Johz> Well there are others who don't seem to think so, so I'm guessing the problem is more down to you.
  190. [15:08:09] <@Karp> joshua also gets on with my parents, unlike you.
  191. [15:08:21] <@Karp> there are plenty of people who agree with me
  192. [15:08:23] <+Joshua> Especoally his mother
  193. [15:08:26] <+Joshua> Rawr
  194. [15:08:30] <+Joshua>  ;-)
  195. [15:08:34] <+jahmurai> Johz, werent you kissin with wop last month?
  196. [15:08:35] <Johz> You know exactly why I don't get on with your mother, after that meal we had.
  197. [15:08:41] <+Joshua> Dont tell karp that
  198. [15:08:50] Joshua [[email protected]] has quit IRC: Quit: Bye
  199. [15:08:52] <@Karp> what do you expect her to do after you made that joke?
  200. [15:08:59] <Johz> I know exactly what she thinks of me, and so do you.
  201. [15:09:01] <@Karp> and you kissed WOP?
  202. [15:09:04] Joshua [[email protected]] has joined #mordor
  203. [15:09:05] ChanServ [[email protected]] has set mode +v Joshua
  204. [15:09:08] <Johz> I would never kiss Wop.
  205. [15:09:09] jahmurai shows the picture
  206. [15:09:12] <@Karp> omg
  207. [15:09:16] <@Karp> what is wrong with you!>
  208. [15:09:21] <@Karp> was luna not enough?
  209. [15:09:22] <Johz> Photoshop!
  210. [15:09:26] <+Joshua> Lol
  211. [15:09:30] <Johz> You were enough, Karp/
  212. [15:09:32] <@Wop> i never kissed Johz
  213. [15:09:33] jahmurai shows the picture on the camera
  214. [15:09:38] <Johz> And then you did this to me.
  215. [15:09:41] <@Karp> the evidence is here wop
  216. [15:09:42] <Johz> And now I don't know where I am.
  217. [15:09:46] <@Karp> dont lie to me
  218. [15:09:54] <@Karp> its all your own doing johz
  219. [15:09:56] <@Wop> I'd get UDL cooties
  220. [15:09:56] <@Wop> :P
  221. [15:09:58] <Johz> I have never kissed Wop in my life.
  222. [15:10:06] <Johz> I wouldn't want to, to be honest.
  223. [15:10:08] <@Karp> then how do you explain this?
  224. [15:10:12] <Johz> You were the only man in my life.
  225. [15:10:12] <@Wop> and Johz would get FRA cooties
  226. [15:10:17] <Johz> I don't know.  I was drunk, alright?
  227. [15:10:20] <Johz> Stuff happens.
  228. [15:10:24] <@Karp> there
  229. [15:10:25] <@Karp> you admit it
  230. [15:10:28] jahmurai points wops panty in johz pants
  231. [15:10:30] <Johz> I don't remember it, it probably meant nothing, but it might have happened.
  232. [15:10:41] <@Karp> dont be so pathetic
  233. [15:10:43] <@Karp> be a man and admit it
  234. [15:10:45] <Johz> Don't tell me you've never done the same.
  235. [15:10:53] <@Karp> i have never cheated on you!
  236. [15:11:00] <@Karp> except with josh
  237. [15:11:01] jahmurai shows johz the picture of karp and madjack
  238. [15:11:05] <Johz> Because I know you have, and I've never cared, because I know that really, you and me are together.
  239. [15:11:05] <@Karp> but that was different!
  240. [15:11:20] <Johz> Eh, I know I'm beat if it was madjack you got.
  241. [15:11:25] <@Karp> you mean that, johz?
  242. [15:11:31] <+Joshua> Karp i cheated on you
  243. [15:11:43] <Johz> Of course I mean that, Karpy.
  244. [15:11:44] <+Joshua> But I kept it in your family
  245. [15:11:52] <@Karp> ... i dont know what to say.
  246. [15:12:14] <Johz> There's only one thing we can say, isn't there?
  247. [15:12:15] jahmurai shows the same ring both joshua and meeko are wearing
  248. [15:12:17] <Johz> I'm sorry.
  249. [15:12:25] <Johz> I'm sorry for the abuse, and I want you back.
  250. [15:12:29] <@Karp> I'm.. sorry.
  251. [15:12:35] <Johz> Karpy, will you have me back, please?
  252. [15:12:36] DYP [[email protected]] has quit IRC: Quit: http://www.mibbit.com ajax IRC Client
  253. [15:12:38] <+Joshua> You can have him johz
  254. [15:12:43] <@Karp> yes!
  255. [15:12:50] Karp runs in slow-mo at Johz
  256. [15:12:52] <+Joshua> Hell ill sell him to you jphz
  257. [15:13:00] Johz runs in slow-mo at Karp
  258. [15:13:05] <Johz> Together, again!
  259. [15:13:10] <+jahmurai> *karp trips
  260. [15:13:18] Johz helps Karp up.
  261. [15:13:29] Karp hugs Johz
  262. [15:13:34] Johz hugs Kar
  263. [15:13:36] <Johz> **Karp
  264. [15:13:42] <+jahmurai> whos kar?
  265. [15:13:44] <+jahmurai> Another one?
  266. [15:13:46] <@Karp> WHO THE FUCKS KAR?
  267. [15:13:49] <+jahmurai> Even when you are making up?
  268. [15:13:59] <+jahmurai> Djeez johz :p
  269. [15:14:00] <Johz> You know I meant you.
  270. [15:14:03] <Johz> I just got confused.
  271. [15:14:07] <@Karp> im just kidding ;)
  272. [15:14:08] <+Joshua> Lies
  273. [15:14:11] <+Joshua> Lies
  274. [15:14:11] jahmurai points to kar
  275. [15:14:15] <Johz> It was a long time ago, man, way before you.
  276. [15:14:16] <+Joshua> Lok
  277. [15:14:21] <Johz> You're the only one for me now.
  278. [15:14:24] <+Joshua> Lies
  279. [15:14:26] Joshua [~Joshua@75-141-132-88.dhcp.mdfd.or.charter.com] has been kicked from #mordor by Karp [Karpy@85.211.41.62]: I'm done with you
  280. [15:14:31] Joshua [[email protected]] has joined #mordor
  281. [15:14:32] ChanServ [[email protected]] has set mode +v Joshua
  282. [15:14:37] <+Joshua> Lol
  283. [15:14:54] Joshua kicks karp in the groin
  284. [15:14:57] <@Karp> now why don't we get that gash bandaged up? that pan must have been heavy
  285. [15:16:14] <Johz> It was.
  286. [15:16:20] <Johz> And, hang on a second.
  287. [15:16:25] Johz roots through a cupboard.
  288. [15:16:35] <Johz> I think I've found some party rings.  Do you want some?
  289. [15:16:48] <+jahmurai> erm
  290. [15:16:55] <@Karp> That is the most romantic thing anyone's ever said to me.
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