Pranks (AiE)

>Pranks in Equestria.
>As you sit on the couch just loving the fact that you don't have to work to live here, you feel the need to piss.
>You get up and walk over to the bathroom.
>Then pull your pants all the way down.
>This is your house and you can do whatever the fuck you want.
>So FUCK ZIPPERS.
>When you start going you don't hear the rainbow maned pegasus sneak in behind you.
>Suddenly your pants are pulled up and your dick continues pissing, completely soaking the pants and underwear in urine.
>When you turn around screaming, you see Rainbow Dash.
"YOU FUCKING BITCH!"
>She falls on her back in laughter and points at your ruined clothing.
>"BAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"YOU DUMB CUNT, GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!"
>She gets up still giggling and flies out the window.
>You take off your pants and underwear in rage.
>This.
>Means.
>War.
>...
>You are now at the market where Rainbow is buying some groceries.
>It's taken almost all day of following her but you finally have the opportunity to launch your prank.
>Some would call this stalking but you're on a mission.
>To get that bitch back.
>You put on the mask and sneak up to her.
>She turns and you jump behind the huge white stallion there.
>He pays no mind as you use him as cover.
>When she turns her back again to go to another stand, you jump over the stallion and creep up to her.
>She picks up a bag of tomatoes in her mouth and is about to fly off.
>You grab her by the sides.
>She turns and sees the werewolf mask you have on.
>Then you scream as loud as you can and she screams too, dropping the tomatoes.
>"DAMN IT ANON!"
>You throw the mask off and run away laughing.

>This is great.
>You are laying on the front lawn in a chair just smiling to yourself.
>Totally got that bitch back.
>Oh god the look on her face when she saw the mask.
>You're still smiling.
>It makes you giggle.
>Then chuckle.
>And burst into laughter once again.
"Hahahaha! What a dumb cunt!"
>Suddenly water dumps down on you.
>You look up to see Rainbow on a cloud.
>She smirks.
"FUCK YOU!"
>She giggles a little.
"DON'T YOU FUCKING LAUGH AT ME!"
>She pushes the cloud away screaming with laughter.
>Fine.
>This bitch wants to play?
>It's time to play.

>It is ready.
>The third most awful prank you can think of.
>You hold the chocolate egg in your hand.
>It's an egg you put under Pinkie's chocolate fountain.
>She helped you wrap it in a blue tin foil to make it look like the candy.
>But she told you to come by later to do some work as payment for pulling a prank this mean.
>It's whatever though.
>The chocolate has hardened now and you're on your way to "apologize" to Rainbow.
>Her house comes into view.
>When you get under it you look up and cup your hands around your mouth.
"HEY RAINBOW!"
>Her head pokes off the side and she peers down at you.
>"Oh hey Anon. All dried off now?"
>She smirks.
"Oh ha ha. Look I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for scaring you and I hope that we can end this on a good note."
>Her expression changes to a more serious one as she flies down.
>"You mean it?"
>A warm smile comes from your face.
"Of course."
>She folds her forlegs and furrows her brow.
>"I don't believe you."
>You hold out the chocolate egg.
"Look, I got this for you."
>Her eyes widen and she takes it in her hooves.
>"You got me a chocolate egg? How did you know they were my favorite?"
>She bites down on it.
>A look of horror and disgust is on her face as the egg cracks in her mouth.
>She turns to the side and vomits chocolate and egg shells.
>May the afterlife have mercy on your sides.
>"FUCK YOU ANON I KNEW YOU WERE BULLSHITTING!"
>She flies back up to her house and the door slams shut, leaving you there giggling to yourself.
"Haha..."
>Well, you should probably go help Pinkie with whatever it is she wants you to do.

>You arrive at Sugarcube Corner and push the door open.
>Pinkie comes bouncing in from the kitchen and stops floating in the air.
>"Oh, hi Anon! Come on back!"
>She turns around while still floating and bounces back into the kitchen.
>Fucking Pinkie.
>How does she work?
>Fuck thinking.
>You follow her into the kitchen and she pulls up a seat.
>"Sit."
"Why?"
>"Just do it."
"Alright."
>You sit down.
>"Time for a... CUPCAKE TASTE TEST!"
"Sweet!"
>She goes to the right and wheels a cart of cupcakes over.
>"Okie dokie! Let's get started!"
>She gives you a cupcake.
>You take a bite of it.
"Tastes pretty good. Nice classic mix of Vanilla cake and Chocolate icing."
>She nods and gives you another while taking the one you just bit.
>You take a bite of this one.
>Chocolate cake, chocolate icing.
"Some might like it, but I personally think it's too much chocolate."
>"Okay, now this one!"
>She gives you another and takes the other one.
>Smells minty.
>Hm.
>You take a bite.
>A gross taste enters your mouth.
>Turn to the side to spit it out.
"WHAT THE FUCK?! WAS THAT TOOTHPASTE?!"
>Rainbow comes around the corner smirking with a bottle of toothpaste in her mouth.
>She drops it and flies out giggling.
"GOD FUUUCKING DAAAMN IIIIT!"

>Fucking Rainbow Dash.
>You'll show her she can't fuck with you.
>That's why you sent her an invitation pretending to be Fluttershy.
>You hide in Fluttershy's bushes waiting for the victim to come up the hill.
>Soon enough, she lands at the door and bangs a hoof on it a couple times.
>"Fluttershy? Ya told me to meet you here?"
>When she looks through the window, you jump out of the bush and tackle her.
>"Anon! Get off me!"
>She struggles against you as you bring the dog collar up to her neck.
>"What are you-"
>You snap it in place and stand.
>She tries looking down at it but cannot.
>Then she digs her hooves at it but nothing happens.
>"Anon get this off me!"
"Oh alright..."
>You walk over to her and pull out a strip of meat.
>Then you tie it to the collar and run away.
>When you look back over your shoulder you see her being attacked by Fluttershy's animals.
>They form a pile on her and the bear divebombs in the middle.
>That's not really what you expected to happen, but it'll teach a cunt.
>When you turn around to leave, an explosion noise is heard.
>You turn back to see animals that shouldn't be flying now soaring through the air.
>Rainbow is coming straight at you.
>She headbutts you the chest and you are knocked onto your ass.
>"YOU THINK THAT'S A PRANK?! THEN FINE, LET'S PRANK LIKE THAT!"
>She pulls a box of matches from behind her wing and lights one across the dirt path.
>Then she puts it on your shirt.
>It catches fire and she flies off.
"AHHH WHAT THE FUCK?!"
>You manage to tear it off you before you get any serious injuries.
>Rainbow just makes it out of view when you stand.
>That's it.
>It's time to end this.

>You're outside of her house now.
>Before you can call her name, you feel a tap on your side.
>When you turn she is standing there with rage in her eyes.
"Rainbow I'm sorry!"
>"I DON'T BELIEVE YOU!"
"I didn't think it would get that serious! I really am sorry!"
>She cocks back her hoof to strike you.
>You put the heart shaped candy box out in front of you to absorb the blow.
>"H-Huh?"
>When you open your eyes you see that no damage has happened to you or the box.
>She stares at it and lowers her hoof.
"Look, I'm sorry. I want you to take this as a hope that we can one day go back to just being regular friends."
>Her angry face slowly begins to go back to normal with each word you speak.
>Then from normal into happy.
>A sincere happy.
>"Anon... This is so nice of you. That's the prank huh? TO PRETEND TO BE NICE TO ME AND THEN-"
>You silence her with a hug.
>She continues to stare forward for a second before hugging back.
"I'm sorry."
>"...me too. I shouldn't have set your shirt on fire."
>You break the hug and look down to your bare chest.
"It's okay. Here, I want you to have this."
>"This is really sweet of you but I-"
"Please?"
>She smiles at you and then looks to the box.
>With a light blush she holds out her hooves to accept it, "Oh alright..."
>You give it to her.
>She opens it.
>Cockroaches swarm out of it and spread over her body.
>She flies up and into town screaming your name as cockroaches crawl all over her.
>Best.
>Prank.
>Ever.