Basement chat #1 (Firepanda)

[5:22 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: so I'm gonna ask, is there a particular real-life reason driving this fixation on preventing a suicide attempt to a fictional character that ultimately failed.
[5:24 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: because that's the only reason I can fathom for continuing to argue the point after Noval and I said clearly, the event is final and we're not interested in continuing it, and especially Kyofan doesn't really care.
[5:31 PM] Firepanda: I can specifically say that untill a few years ago (I luckily changed the school once again) that I was bullied very strongly, and personally even thought about suicide. I was in something like a psychiatry for this and extreme anger caused by the bullying.
It is also ridiculous that i got thrown out of that one idiot school because "There is no bullying at our school".  Because this anger lead to outbursts. I got to be a temporary myth at the schools i left.
I put that mostly into my past now, 5 years have passed and I hoped I didn't need to be reminded of this to explain myself.

Still When everyone is against me I still get really tensed up because of that and feel the need to defend myself till I win. Even if the try is futile.
[5:32 PM] Firepanda: I specifically don't want this info spread somewhere. It lies in my past and noone needs to know it.
[5:35 PM] Jake, Quinn, Lumi, Sei [GV 🖖]: I'm sorry you went through that. I don't have a problem with any IC results, but you really shouldn't let fiction affect you like that. I also think that your passion in the matter is wasted on Jose.(edited)
[5:37 PM] Firepanda: May I ask on what it wouldn't be wasted?
[5:39 PM] Jake, Quinn, Lumi, Sei [GV 🖖]: Real life activism and support, or helping real life people with real depression/bullying through RP
[5:41 PM] Jake, Quinn, Lumi, Sei [GV 🖖]: just some ideas, not an exhaustive list
[5:42 PM] Firepanda: i didnt expct a list
[5:51 PM] Jake, Quinn, Lumi, Sei [GV 🖖]: Well, that's my answer. You went ahead to the restaurant instead of intervening, so you can't really do anything else. And unless you had an IC reason to be concerned, there's no reason for you to have done otherwise.
[5:52 PM] Jake, Quinn, Lumi, Sei [GV 🖖]: If you wanted to ask him to change it OOC, right after he posted it was the time.
[5:52 PM] Firepanda: we did debate it right after he posted it though.
[5:53 PM] Firepanda: and i thought the general consensus was remove it
[5:54 PM] Jake, Quinn, Lumi, Sei [GV 🖖]: We thought it was dumb, but allowed him to keep it. So you would have had to convince Jose.
[5:57 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: ah, so I was right, real life influences reactions to fiction, I really couldn't visualize any other reason this was your hill to die on
[5:59 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: let me tell you about the time I was bulled in elementary from second to 5th grade, and withdrew from everyone in junior high up until I realized it was entirely my fault and it was too late to fix it
[5:59 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: I'm not, actually, would take too long and this adequately sums it up.
[6:00 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: I have not much else to add cause caleb said the majority of it
[6:03 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: and frankly 'dark secret past' continues to be a dumb reaction to fiction, there is such a thing as empathizing so much with fiction that it starts negatively affecting you irl, and you are entirely in control of how you react to things.
[6:12 PM] Firepanda: You would happen to agree that I wouldn't like to reveal far too much private informations, right?
[6:13 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: wasn't asking for more elaboration.
[6:13 PM] Firepanda: Seemed like you wanted(edited)
[6:15 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: not particularly, I got the gist and I highly doubt more details are going to change anything
[6:15 PM] Firepanda: Understood
[6:17 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: so, are we cool, do we understand that final means final and we don't want to do this again
[6:17 PM] Firepanda: yes. I am stupidly stubborn sometimes
[6:19 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: ok
[6:20 PM] Roland, Orrin, Samui [Kain]: think it's been long enough.