Last Single Man in Town Shorts

Meow Mall
Mrs. Richardson, an elderly woman who had regained her youth by becoming a succubus with magenta wings and strawberry blonde hair, entered the local mall with her small army of cait sith.
Mrs. Richardson: Alright, now where should we go first? *the cait sith step in front of her*
Mittens: Doan worry mommy!
Lunette: You can leave the shopping to us!
Boots: Vous pouvez vous détendre tout en obtenant tout sur la liste! Troupes! S'aligner! *the rest of the cait sith line up in three separate platoons* Le groupe numéro un viendra avec moi à la pharmacie pour réapprovisionner la trousse de premiers secours!
M: Group 2 will come wif us 2 the electronic store 2 look 4 fone chargers!
L: And Group 3 will come with me to pick up the groceries. Let’s move out! *the cait siths salute before following Mittens, Lunette, or Boots to their respective destinations* We’ll meet back here in ten minutes!
MR: Oh… I guess I’ll just stay here then… *Mrs. Richardson finds a bench nearby, and sits down with a sigh* Those silly kitties. I know they just want to help, but they really know how to take the fun out of shopping…
???: Gertrude?
MR: Yes? Who might you- *Mrs. Richardson looks over to see two werecats, one adult and one child* Lucia! Fancy meeting you here! How are you doing?
Lucia: W-we’re doing pretty good. You?
MR: I’m not doing too badly myself, although I guess you could say I’m a little bored though. So who’s this little cutie? Is she your sister?
Lu: No. She’s my little cousin Gina. Say hello Gina.
Gina: You’ve got big boobies…
Lu: G-Gina! *Mrs. Richardson laughs*
MR: It’s fine dearie. That’s just how kids are. And are you going after Chance too?
G: No. I already have a boyfriend.
Lu: W-what?! Already?
G: Of course. You’re just slow Lucia.
Lu: Guh! *Mrs. Richardson giggles*
MR: So what brings you two to the mall?
G: Lucia wants to pick up a game.
MR: A game?
Lu: Yeah! It’s called Mass Effect Andromeda! I’ve been looking forward to playing it for a while now, but it always so hard getting this kind of stuff since “the Opening”. It came in today, so I brought Gina since I was babysitting her.
MR: I see! Then I’ll leave you two alone so you can get your shopping done. *Mrs. Richardson pets Lucia’s and Gina’s head*
G: Ah!
Lu: Muh…
MR: Hm?
Lu+G: MOMMY~! *Lucia and Gina knock Mrs. Richardson over, and begin to nuzzle against her breasts*
MR: O-oh my~!
G: Mommy~!
Lu: I’m hungry~! *the werecats manage to rip Mrs. Richardson’s shirt, and they begin sucking her nipples*
MR: N-no~! S-stop~! Y-you’re not g-going to g-get any miiiiiilk~! AH~!*After ten minutes, the cait sith army arrive to find a crowd gathered around a half-naked Mrs. Richardson getting her breasts sucked by Lucia and Gina, who are equally near naked*
L: What’s going on?
Lu: Mommy~!
G: I’m still hungry mommy! Give me milk~!
MR: N-No more… Please… No moooore! *Mrs. Richardson arches her back as she cums once again* NooOoOOO~!
M: Wuts goin on?
B: Qu'est-ce que ces deux font à maman?
MR: Mittens? Boots! Lunette! Heeelp meeeee~!
L: It looks like mommy needs help! Let’s go!
Cait Sith Army: YEAH! *The cait sith army charges, but they start licking her instead of freeing her*
MR: NoooOoOoOO~! You’re supposed to help meeEEEeEeEe~! *Mrs. Richardson cums again, and this continues until everyone calms down an hour later. Lucia tries her new game once she gets home, and cries herself to sleep*

Delicious
Chance is showing Mrs. Richardson how to use her phone in his kitchen.
Chance: And that’s how you send pictures.
Mrs. Richardson: Wow! Thanks Chance! I hope I can remember how to do this later.
C: I’m sure you will Mrs. Richardson. *Mrs. Richardson looks at the clock on the wall*
MR: Oh dear! Is that the time? I’ve got to get back to finish lunch!
C: Really? Sorry for holding you up.
MR: Oh don’t worry about it dearie. You were helping me after all.
C: So what are you going to make?
MR: Well I need to make a lot of food quickly… I’ll probably be making some fried egg sandwiches.
C: Sounds good.
MR: So what are you going to eat dearie?
C: I don’t know… I don’t really feel like making anything, so maybe I’ll go for some takeout?
MR: Again..?
C: What do you mean again?
MR: I noticed that there are a lot of takeout boxes in your garbage bin.
C: Guh!
MR: That’s not healthy Chance! You’re a grown man, and you need to take responsibility for your health!
C: Y-yes ma’am…
MR: Now wait here Chance. I’ll come back after I’m done at home to make you some lunch!
C: O-ok… *Mrs. Richardson storms out of Chance’s house, leaving him stunned* What’s going on? *Mrs. Richardson comes back a little while later carrying a carton of eggs, some bread, a block of cheddar cheese, and some butter* That didn’t take too long.
MR: There may be a lot of cait sith, but they don’t eat that much for lunch since I put out some cat food as well. I hope you don’t mind the fact that I brought my own ingredients.
C: That’s fine.
MR: Great! Now just sit down while I get to work! *Chance sits down at the kitchen table, and watches Mrs. Richardson cook for him*
C: You make it look so easy.
MR: I make what look easy dearie?
C: Cooking. You look like a pro.
MR: W-well frying eggs isn’t that hard, and I do have years of practice.
C: That’s true.
MR: Although I do have to admit it is fun to be cooking for someone again.
C: Don’t you cook for all those cait sith?
MR: Yes, but… This might sound odd Chance, but cooking for you feels like I’m cooking for my Byron again.
C: OH?
MR: I don’t mind cooking for everyone. It’s a lot like back when my kids were home, but this. I missed this. Just talking to each other as I got dinner ready. It’s nice.
C: I’m happy you’re enjoying it. I know I’m enjoying having someone cook for me. *Mrs. Richardson places a plate with a couple fired egg sandwiches in front of Chance*
MR: If you’re enjoying having me cook for you, you could marry me. Then I could cook for you every day.
C: O-Oh that’s… I-I-I couldn’t but… I-it’s not that I don’t l-like the idea, b-but I…
MR: It’s fine Chance. I’m only teasing.
C: Y-you are?
MR: Or am I?
C: U-uh… *Chance starts eating the sandwiches* Oh these are delicious! *Mrs. Richardson giggles*
MR: I’m glad you’re enjoying it. Say… Can I head to the bathroom real quick? I need to powder my nose.
C: Hm? Ah! Sure. Go ahead.
MR: Thanks. *Mrs. Richardson watches Chance eat for a moment before heading upstairs. However she slips into Chance’s bedroom instead to entering the bathroom* Let’s see… Mittens said that I should hide the camera somewhere that he can’t find it, but where it has a clear view of the bed… Hm? *Mrs. Richardson notices that one of the nightstand’s drawers was ajar, and a familiar looking envelope was poking out of it* That looks like… *She picks up the envelope, and opens it to find a series of photographs that feature her in the kitchen getting molested by her cait sith* He couldn’t be? He’s actually..! O-oh my~! *Mrs. Richardson blushes giddily, and quickly puts the envelope back before heading back downstairs*
C: Find the bathroom ok?
MR: Yes. Actually do you mind if I head home Chance? I’m not feeling too good.
C: Really? You do look a little flushed. Did you need some help?
MR: No that’s fine. Thanks anyway dearie.
C: Alright. Thanks for sandwiches!
MR: You’re welcome. *Mrs. Richardson heads home, and spends the next two hours masturbating to the thought of Chance masturbating to pictures of her*

Best Girl Awards
Yuuka is watching the sunset through her office window when she hears someone snoring softly behind her.
Yuuka: Even I can sit back and smell the roses sometimes Gale. *Gale the dormouse snorts in her sleep* What do you mean “that’s why I’m not in any more chapters”?! That fool only wrote five! If anything, it’s his fault. *Gale snores again* Urg… Don’t remind me. The next thing you know that hack will make some sort of crossover with some other goofball series, or something. Anyway, let’s get back to business. What’s so important that you had to come bother me? *Gale mumbles something in her sleep* Really? And the odds of me winning are..? *Gale coos in her sleep* Excellent. Now Gale, be a good little minion and get a hold of Chance for me. I want him to be my date for tonight. And if everything goes according to plan… *Yuuka begins to chuckle to herself, but stops when Gale snores* If that’s the case, then I guess you can say goodbye to your rare cheese bonus this month. *Yuuka waits for a response, only to find out that Gale had already left* Funny how easy that was. I’ll have to remember to use that threat again.
That night at an awards ceremony, Blindeyes walks up to the podium.
Blindeyes: All right everyone! I hope you’re still enjoying tonight’s festivities! So let’s move onto our next category: The Best Girl Award! So let’s open this envelope, and find out who won! *Blindeyes pulls out an envelope, and quickly reads its contents* Now in third place was the youthful, but dead Verena! *the camera points to an empty seat* Huh… And in second place, our great and powerful queen: Aleena! *the camera pans to a second empty seat* Another no show? Then let’s go to the crème de la crème, the foxy boss who’ll have you begging to work overtime! Yuuka! *the camera pans to a third empty seat* You there Yuuka? Yuuka Hisakawa, come on down! *Blindeyes waits awkwardly on stage for a few minutes* You know what? Fine! I don’t have to be here! This isn’t even canon anyway! I’m going to talk to my agent!
Wendy: You don’t have an agent!
BE: Then I’m going to hire one, then fire them for not being there to stop this travesty! *Blindeyes storms off the stage. Meanwhile, somewhere where the light never reaches, Yuuka and Gale are cuffed to the floor on all fours. Verena and a teenaged Aleena look down on them in disdain*
Aleena: Like, to think you’d try something like this again Foxy. I thought I totally showed you, like, your place last time.
Verena: Disgusting…
Y: I keep telling you I won that award fair and square! *Gale snores in agreement*
A: Like whatever. I don’t care about some award. I care about you, like, trying to brainwash my pet into loving you. Again. Talk about dirty. *Gale snores*
Y: Traitor! You’re not supposed to be agreeing with them!
A: It just goes to show that your actions were like totally inexcusable!
V: … Lady Aleena..?
A: Like, what is it Sunshine?
V: Why are you talking like that? And why do you look so young?
A: Well I knew that we were going to be punishing Foxy together, and I was like “OMG! Verena looks like a teen, and people totes loved me like this, so why not teen tag team this bitch?” Isn’t this just awesome~!
V: No… This feels forced…
Y: I agree. You sound like you’re going to say, “How do you do fellow kids?”
A: Like, everyone’s a critic… Anyway, let’s get this show on. The. Road! *a panel on the wall behind Aleena opens up to reveal an arsenal of exotic sex toys* So Sunshine. What should we, like, start with?
Y: Wait! Gale is innocent in all of this! Please let her go!
V: The dormouse requested that we tie her up.
Y: What?
V: The dormouse requ-
Y: I know what you said! How could you do this to me Gale?! You were supposed to go for help! *Gale snorts* Because of the cheese?!?! Why you li- *Aleena shoves a large purple dildo in Yuuka’s mouth while Verena uses her magic to create a dildo golem. And thus began another long night for Yuuka*

Ladies Guild
Brook, Chance’s orc mother, walks into a meeting room at the local community center. It is filled with other orcs. A couple of the orcs spot Brook, and they approach her.
Brook: Tina! Jane! It’s good to see you again!
Jane: It’s been way too long!
Tina: You make it sound like she’s been gone for months. It’s only been a week.
J: It certainly felt like forever. You never get the real juicy gossip.
T: Well sorry if I’m not glued to the grapevine.
B: I don’t really have any good gossip this week either though. I’ve been too busy.
J: Really?
T: I bet it’s the goblins. I hear that they’re supposed to be really childish.
B: They can be, but they help me out quite a bit too.
J: Like in the bedroom?
B: J-Jane!
J: You don’t have to be so embarrassed. You’re sharing your husband with a couple monsters who look like kids. I bet you just love having them suck on your breasts while Dylan goes to town on you. Especially now that you’ve gotten so big. *Jane motions to Brooks breasts*
B: T-they didn’t get that much bigger… Oink…
T: Don’t take it personally Brook. Jane’s still a little sore about the gal she’s sharing her husband with. Turns out she’s his secretary, and they’ve been together since before the “Opening”.
B: Oh dear…
J: Oink… Why’d you have to remind me..?
T:  Why do you keep picking on Brook? Actually… Speaking of lovers, how’s Chance doing?
B: What about Chance?
T: Is he still singl-
???: ATTEEEEEEEENTION! *the orcs all look to the other end of the room to find a high orc dressed in a dirty pair of shorts and a t-shirt that barely covers her nipples* I’d like to call this week’s Ladies Guild meeting to ORDER!
Orcs: YES MA’AM! *the orcs quickly take their seats at the large table. The high orc waits for everyone to be seated before sitting down herself*
High Orc: We will begin with the minutes from the last meeting. Secretary!
J: Yes ma’am! *Jane looks at her papers* After reviewing the previous meeting we read a thank you letter from the Thompsons for catering their wedding. We then decided that Maude will be the one to be in charge for this year’s BBQ. After that we taste tested the beer that boss made in her basement.
HO: Oh yeah. That was pretty fun.
J: We all got drunk, and boss spent most of the rest of the meeting complaining about how she’s still single.
HO: Wait…
J: She then had loud, passionate sex with treasurer Tina on the table, and the meeting was adjourned after she fell asleep in a drunken stupor.
HO: I want that all stricken from the records, and none of you are to speak of it ever again!
Orcs: YES MA’AM!
HO: Now before we go any further there are a few announcements to make. First of all I’d like to congratulate Nicole for becoming a grandmother. *the orcs begin to congratulate an older orc*
Nicole: Thank you! Marcy finally gave birth this morning to a beautiful baby yu-… yuki-… yuki-washing… Hold on. *Nicole pulls out a little note* Yuki-warashi. She’s a little cold to the touch, but cute as a button~!
HO: Excellent. Now moving on to the next topic. *this continues for a couple of hours* AND WE WILL MAKE SURE THAT PEOPLE WILL BE TALKING ABOUT THAT WEDDING DINNER FOR GENERATIONS!
Frenzied Orcs: YEAH!
HO: FOR THE GLORY OF ORC-KIND!
Frenzied Orcs: FOR THE GLORY OF ORC-KIND!
HO: AND WITH THAT YOU ARE ALL DISMISSED! I’LL SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!
Frenzied Orcs: SEE YOU NEXT WEEK BOSS! *the frenzied orcs then rush out of the room to head home. Later that night at Brook’s house, her husband Dylan was talking to Chance on the phone*
Dylan: Sounds like you had quite the day there Chance. *Brook suddenly breaks down the door* It’s your mom. She’s back from her meeting.
B: BREED ME! *Brook rips off her clothes, tackles Dylan to the ground, and mounts him*
D: C-can you let me say goodbye to Chance first? *Brook grabs the phone from Dylan, and puts it to her ear*
B: Hi Sweetie. I’d love to talk, but I really need to make you a little sister. Ok. Ok. Don’t forget to brush your teeth. Ok. Talk to you later. *Brook hangs up before smashing the phone against the wall* IMPREGNATE ME NOW WORM! *the next morning finds Brook and Dylan cuddling naked on the floor. They both wake up when they hear a knock*
D: Can you get that sugar buns? I don’t think I’ll be able to move for a while.
B: Alright honey… *Brook gets up and stretches as she heads to the front door, which was now missing. There she finds the high orc from last night* Boss! What are you doing here?
HO: I was just in the neighborhood, and thought I’d stop by and see how things were going. I wasn’t interrupting anything was I?
B: Oh no. We were just waking up. Want to come in?
HO: I would, but I can’t stay for too long. Actually…
B: Yes?
HO: I heard some of the girls talking, and they were saying that you had a son.
B: Yeah. His name’s Chance.
HO: Chance… That a nice name. He wouldn’t happen to be single?
B: Uh well…
HO: Because I’ve been so lonely since I came over from the other world, and I’d love to have someone of my own…
B: If you put it that way…
HO: To make him squeal as I rape him into submission night after night. *the high orc sighs dreamily* I can hardly remember the last time I pegged a man… So is he available? *Brook pinches herself hard*
B: S-sorry boss. C-Chance already h-has someone.
HO: Really? Do they mind sharing?
B: W-when I said someone, I-I meant he had multiple someones!
HO: Ah… That’s too bad. I guess it was too good to be true.
B: That’s just how it goes sometimes.
HO: By the way, is there any reason you’re pinching yourself?
B: Oink? Arm’s numb from sleeping on the floor.
HO: Alright. Well… I’ll see you later. *the high orc leaves, and Brook rushes back to Dylan*
D: Hey there honey buns. *Brook bursts into tears* W-what’s wrong?!
B: I just lied to boss to keep her from Chance! I’m such a bad orc! Punish me please!
D: Just give me a minute to rest first please.