A horse out of heck

>You are Noschtiana Cloud
>Noscht for short
>Noschty for friends
>Your entire life you've spent in Hollow Shades
>As most batponies do
>You are currently residing in a second level apartment on main street
>For a couple of days now you've been seeing ponies going in and out the empty space directly beneath you
>One night, as you walk on main street, you see that the space has been converted into a tiny bookshop
>A bookshop! Just beneath your home!
>How exciting!
>You could make friends with the shopkeeper and he might sell you books cheaper
>You run to the market and buy a couple of mangos, a pineapple and a few bananas
>You get back home, chop them up and put them in a nice looking dish
>You go in front of the bookshop
>The sign says "closed"
>You never let such a thing as signs stop you
>Sure, that life philosophy had you arrested a few times
>But you are a free spirit
>You can not be so easily deterred
"Ith anypony in there!?"
>You yell out, lisping through out
>You start banging on the door
"Hello!?"
>You bang and you bang
>"ALRIGHT ALREADY!"
>You hear the footsteps and lowercase swearing
>The key is put into the lock
>It turns
>You put on a big smile and close your eyes
"Hello neigh-bour! I live jutht above your shop and dethided to drop by! My name ith Noschtiana, but you can call me Noo---"


>You open your eyes
>It's a unicorn
>You've never seen a unicorn before
>Just heard about them from ponies who've been around
>You can't help but stare at his horn
>"Can I help you?"
"Huh?"
>He looks cross
>And unsavory
>And he smells a bit
"I...um...I am Noschtiana, but you...you..."
>You drift off again towards his horn
>No!
>He's new here!
>You have to be friendly!
>You mustn't bat an eye
>You look back at him
>His expression hasn't changed
>Seems like a patient fellow
"You can call me Noscht! I brought you a plate of fruit ath a thign of neighbourly appreciation!"
>You hand him the plate
>He takes it
>Looks at it with the same expression
>
>
>
>He takes his time
>
>


>"Can't you read?"
>Now he seems more annoyed than angry
>You are warming up to him
"Yeth"
>There are a few moments of silence
>"It says the shop is closed"
"But you are here"
>"Yes"
>"It's my home"
"OOOohh...you live in your shop? Mutht thave money on commuting. kekeke..."
>He looks at you
>You can read mild discomfort in his saggy eyes
>
>"Yes."
>"It does."
"kekek..."
>There is a long silence
>Ordinary ponies would find it very uncomfortable
>He doesn't seem to mind it
>You consider yourself a patient mare
>
>


>You can't help yourself but to drift towards his horn
>A real unicorn
>Can he do magic?
>Can he feel it, when someone touches it?
>Is it like a nail?
>You just keep gazing at it
>
>
>Any bystander that could have seen you now, might think that they were having a stroke
>You - staring at the unicorn's horn with a friendly smile
>He - looking at you with half closed eyes, holding a plate of fruit
>
>
>"Well"
>"Pleasure to meet you...Noschtiana was it?"
"Aha...wait! What'th your name?"
>"Huh...oh...it's Nebulous. Nebulous Haze"
"Thats a long name. Can I call you Nebi?"
>"Why not"
"Alrightie then. I will thee you tomorrow, neighbour"
>He closes the door
>You hop back towards your apartment





>You are Nebulous Haze
>It's the crack of dawn
>
>
>Dusk
>You slowly get up from your bed
>You look around
>Everything is where it was last night
>
>
>Last day
>It's everywhere
>You aren't a very tidy homeowner
>If you can call it a home
>As you get up, you step on something
>You look down and see it's a silver plate
>You don't own plates
>Let alone silver plates
>Where did it come from
>You try to remember
>You can't recall anything
>But as you stare at the plate more and more you start to remember something
>A lisp
>That's right
>It belonged to that girl you met yesterday
>
>
>Yesternight
>You can't seem to get the hang of this
>It's going to take you some time to get accustomed to this new way of life
>Might as well get up
>You've been staring at the plate for ten minutes
>You are losing daylight
>
>
>Nightlight
>You get up
>A door seperates your humble abode and your place of buisiness
>You walk into the shop
>You slowly walk towards the front door and turn the sign
>You walk back to you desk and sit
>You pour yourself a glass and open a book
>"27 000 knock-knock jokes revolving around the themes of glass and lead"
>You admit that you sell very...niche literature



>As you read through your book, you notice, with the corner of your eye, somepony walk in
>They are standing by your desk
>You have been ignoring them for 15 minutes now
>"Ahem"
>They crack first
>You give yourself a mental point
>You look up and see it's the bat pony from ealrier
>Grinning like a schoolfilly
>You just notice that she is missing one of her fangs
>Maybe that is why she lisps so much
>She seems full of excitment
>Why is she so excited?
>There's nothing to be excited about here
>The shop is a mess
>It sells low-rate books
>Why is she so excited?
>Maybe it's because of the plate
>You take a drink and stand up
>You go to your room and retrieve the plate
>When you come back she's still standing there
>Grinning with excitment
>You hand the plate
"Here"
"Thanks for the fruit"
>She takes it
>"You are welcome"
>You sit back down and continue reading
>
>
>
>She's still there


>You look back at her
"Can I help you in anyway mizz Cloud?"
>"Yeth, I am looking for a book"
>You gaze at her for a moment
>You have such a great amount of dearth of enthusiasm that it could kill a man
>You spread your forelegs
"We have many"
>"Yeth, but I am looking for a thpethific book"
"Oh. I doubt you will find it here"
>"Why?"
>Her expression changes from one of excitment to one of disappointed questioning
"What book are you looking for?"
>"It'th a love thtory. "The wingth on which you carry me". It'th about a lonely bat mare that..."
>You've stopped listening and gotten up

>You search through your shelves
>The bat follows you
>Probably hoping that you'd have that book
>You take out a huge tome
>You can barely lift it
>You smash it on your desk
>The bat just looks at it
>""Erocrathy: thexthual pthychology and how it affectth the life, thothial thtructure and political order of bat-pony thothiety"?"
"It's more or less the same, minus the purple prose"
>"A-are you sure about that?"
"Positvie"
>You've never read "The wings on which you carry me"
>Nor "Erocracy"
>But you figure it's all the same really
"That will be 25 canadian deutschmarken"
>"What?"
"I mean bits"
>"Um...ok...thinthe you don't have my book, I'll trutht you that thith ith a good thubthtitute...neighbour"
>She takes out her purse and gives you the money
>You give her the book and sit back at your desk
>"Nebi"
>You look at her
>"Thinthe we are neighbourth and all that, would you like to come for dinner tonight? We can get to know eachother"
>You stare at her
>Dinner
>You've heared a lot about bat-ponies and their ungodly libido
>There is a great chance you go up there and you'll get chloroform to the face
>Or you get served sleeping potion instead of fruit soup
>And then you wake up with a ball-gag in your mouth, hanging from the ceiling, hooks piercing your skin, a kidney lighter and you are somewhere in Whitetown
>2 or 3 minutes of staring you answer
"No, thank you"
>She seems disappointed
>Her ears fall back
>"Oh...ok...another time then"
"For sure"
>Those last two words kind of perk her up
>"Well, I'll thee you around"
"See you"
>She walks out of the door
>You take a drink and continue reading your book
"Heh. Didn't see that punchline coming"


>You are Noschtiana Cloud
>Noscht for shrot
>Noschty for friends
>After a long nihgt going around town and checking your to-do list, you decide to visit your newest friend's bookshop
>You enter the bookshop and notice it's quite lively
>A lot of ponies browsing and reading
>Nebi is sitting at his desk, reading
>You go to him
>Not wanting to disturb him, you stand by his desk until he notices you
>
>
>
>Fifteen minutes later you decide you clear your throat, to get his attention
"Ahem"
>For a brief second, a small smile appears on his face
>It's the first time you've seen him smile
>Maybe he's happy to see you
>That thought alone makes you giddy

>"Mizz Cloud."
"You don't have to call me that"
>"Alright, Noschtiana"
"You can jutht call me Noscht"
>"I can, can I, Noschtiana"
>He finally turns away from his book, towards you
>"To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"Well, I dethided to vithit you, thee how the shop ith going..."
>"It's a disaster!"
>Your ears fall back a bit
"H-how tho? There are a lot of ponieth here"
>"And all of them are complaining. "Do you have this book", "Do you have that book" "It isn't well ogranized", "It's a mess", "Why is there a pile of rotten meat in the corner", "You shouldn't drink on the job", "I think I saw a raccoon". These ponies can't be satisfied"
>As he is rambling on in his monotone voice, cracking on certain occaisions, a mare walks to the desk
>Yellow eyes, light-blue coat, greyish mane
>She walks slowly, hips swaying, powered by sexappeal
>"Excuse me, how much for this book?"
>You don't think you've ever heard somepony wishing to engage in a trade with such sexual power in her voice
>Nebulous takes the book
>""Pictorial guide to moss; 73rd eddition." That will be 30 bits"
>You don't think you've ever heard somepony engaging in a trade with such apathy towards existence in their voice
>"30 bits? Isn't that a bit too high?"
>"It does sound high for a book about pictures of moss."
>He stares at the book with an expression of false concentration
>
>
>
>"29 bits. I'll even give you a gift bag for 1 bit"

>"Come now, dear. I'm sure we can work on a way to lower the price..."
>The sparkle in her eyes
>The tone of her voice
>The way she plays with her mane
>The way she's spread her wings just a bit, so as to give you a taste, but not the full package
>Even you are barely holding yourself from jumping on the mare
>Nebi, on the other hand, looks at her the same way one would look at a bowl of moldy musly and expired milk ordered from a 5-star restaurant
>Not too impressed
>At the very least they could have cleaned the silverware
>
>
>"28 bits + a one bit gift bag + a one bit page divider"

>She seems a little taken aback
>'Is he slow?' is probably what the mare would be thinking right now
>"I'm trying to offer you sex here"
>Nebi's eyes widen and his jaw drops
>All in a sarcastic way
>"OOoohh...Why didn't you say so..."
>"That'll be 28 bits for the book, 1 bit for the bag, 1 bit for the divider and 35 bits for sex"
>She looks even more taken aback
>"No, I mean I want to pay you with sex. For the book"
>"Well, that's fine and dandy, but sex doesn't have very good monetary value, now does it? I can't pay my bills with sex. I can't pay my taxes with sex. I can't eat with sex. What am I going to do with sex?"
>"Umm...yes you can. Except for the bills. The bureaubats don't accept it. But all the other things you can do. Hollow Shades has a very sex based economy. I can see you are not from around here. You might not know these things."
>"Ah, well now madame. Thank you for enlightening me on your debaucherous way of life. 30 bits"
>The mare looks contempt
>"Meh...it's been a while since I treated myself to a good book"
>She pays the owener and exits
>All the while being stared at by all of the customers
>"Fifth bat that tried that."
>You snap out of your daze
>That mare sure can move


>"Is it so hard to pay for a book. Who would want to be paid with sex? Is doesn't last as long and how will that look on the accounting sheet?"
"Yeah, crathy thing thexth. Thpeaking of which, I really enjoyed that book you gave me"
>He looks at you questioningly
>
>"Did you?"
"Mhm!"
>He just looks at you
>
>
>
>This conversation isn't going anywhere


"Tho what are you doing later on. After you clothe the shop"
>"Reading knock-knock jokes and getting hammered on cheap moonshine."
"kekeke..."
>He raises one of his eyebrows
>He wasn't joking
"Well, *ahem* thinthe you aren't doing anything important, maybe you would like to have dinner with me?"
>He stares at you
>As if trying to remember something
>
>
>
>"Didn't we have this conversation already?"
"Yeth, we did."
>
>
>"No, thank you"
"A-are you sure?"
>"I don't want to leave my shop. I think I have a raccoon infestation and don't trust those pesky buggers. They might eat everything in my shop and defecate everywhere. Just torn books and coon shit all around."
>He takes a moment to observe his shop
>He reminds you of one of those war veterans that sometimes just slip out-of reality
>But you aren't going to let him ruin your mood with his lack of healthcare procedures
"We can eat here"
>"I'm a bit short on cash. New business and all"
"Don't worry. It's on me"
>"Oh, terrific. Come around at about 3"
>You smile and turn towards the door
>"And bring plates"
>You turn and nod
>"And utensils."
>Alright
>"And a mallet. For the coons"
>There is a posiblity you might regret this

>3 o'clock approaches
>You have everything needed
>A nice salad
>Plates
>Utensils
>A mallet
>And mango-ice cream
>Everything is in order
>You go down stares and knock on the shop
>It doesn't open
"Neeeebi! Open up! It'th me!"
>Still nothing
>Did he forget?
"Nebulouth, are you in there? Come on! Open the door!"
>You continue to bang
>"ALRIGHT ALREADY!"
>You hear the sound of hoofs
>Paper being crumbled
>Raccoons chirping
>The door opens
>"Yes?"
>He stares at you
>
>
>
"The dinner?"
>"Oh, right, come on in."
>He walks back into his shop and you follow him
>"Have a seat"
>There is an old chair situated infront of the desk
>You place the dinner on the desk, while Nebi goes to his back room
>He walks out, holding a bottle of red wine and two plastic cups
>He sits down and opens the bottle
>He pours the wine in the cups and gives you one of them
"To new friendth!"
>"Sure, let's go with that"
>The bottle looked very fancy
>The label was written in calligraphy
>It had grapes on it, from which sunlight irradiated
>The colour of the wine was a deep shade of red
>Almost black
>Too bad it tasted like vinegar, mixed with rubbing alchohol with a handfull of sugar thrown into it
>You barely swallowed
>Nebi on the other hand is pouring his second glass
>This will be a long night

>It's been half an hour and nobody has said anything
>The only noise is that of raccoons running around from time to time
"Nebi, do you think that if you get rid of that pile of meat in the corner, the raccoonth will go away?"
>Nebi looks at his meat pile
>It's elegantly placed besides a books shelf, close to the desk
>By his expression, you can tell that this time he really is trying to think of an answer
>"Maybe"
>He continues eating
>
>
>
>

>You admit that you are a patient mare
>But this is getting absurd
"Tho...Nebi. Where do you come from?"
>He stops eating and looks at you
>"The mountains"
>He continues eating
>Slowly, but surely, you are getting somewhere
"Which mountainth"
>He continues eating
>"I don't know"
>
>
>"I was young when I came to the city. Don't have many memories from then"
"Tho you've lived in the thity?"
>"Aha"
"Canterlot?"
>"The very same"
"What did you do there?"
>"I studied. Space/Time magic"
"That thoundth interethting."
>"It wasn't. It's a very dry subject. Many numbers and theorems"
>
>
>
"I've thpent my whole life in thith town"
>"Have you now?"
"Mhm. I went to thchool here. I work here. All my friendth are here"
>You see that he is a very voracious eater
>Very agressive with his food and drink
"My family liveth here altho. I really like it. It'th a nithe and cothy little town"
>"If you say so"
>
>
>
>

>You have moved on to desert
>It's a really hard thing to keep a conversation with this guy
>But he doesn't seem annoyed
>And he isn't asking much of you
>You do enjoy a peaceful meal at times
>But you want to learn things about your new friend
>That's how it works
"What made you thtart a bookshop here in Hollow Shadeth?"
>"The low taxes and how easy it is to start a buisiness venture"
>This catches you off guard
>It sounds less like an answer and more like a promotional slogan
"Why didn't you get a job in your field?"
>"Turns out space/time magic isn't that sought after in the job market. So I settled for the next best thing. Shopowner"
"Theemth kinda weird to me"
>"I'm a weird guy"
>
>
>
>Silence is a strong motif in your conversations

>Some time later, after you are finished with dessert, you decide to head home
>Nebi decides to walk you out
"It wath a lovely night."
>"Indeed, it was. We should do it again sometime."
>With that he closes the door
>The sun is rising
>You feel tired
>Your eyes start to hurt
>But you can't help but smile
>You had the feeling that tonight was going to be bad
>But all it needed was a few nice words to cheer you up
>You walk to your apartment to get some shut eye
>Tonight was a nice night

>Be Noschtiana Cloud
>Noscht for short
>Noschty for friends
>It's been about a week since you visited your newest friend
>Tonight that changes
>You are standing in front of his bookshop
>"Closed"
>At this time?
>Not on your watch
>You start banging on the door
"Nebi! Are you in there? Nebi!"
>The door opens
>It wasn't even locked
>You gently push it
>It's dark and quiet
>You slowly walk in
"N-Nebi?"
>"Shhh..."
>You turn towards the desk
>Nebulous is sitting there
>Holding a giant mallet
>You gulp
>You stay still
>He raises his mallet
>BAM!
>"SQUEE-SQUEE-SQUEE"
>"Hehe-got em"
>Nebulous lifts what looks like a rodent with a squished tail, squirming in pain
>He puts it in a sack
>He turns to you
>"Can't you read mizz Cloud?"
>You are stunned by the amount of barbarism you just witnessed
>It takes you a few moments to collect yourself
>
>
>


>"Apparently deaf as well"
"I'm thorry, what are you doing exthactly"
>You are still shaken up
>You are not sure how exactly to interpret what you saw
>"Pest controlling"
>Pest controlling?
>With a mallet?
"With a mallet?"
>"Mmmhmm..."
>His answers are as emotionless as his views on animal cruelty
"Did you conthider an exthterminator?"
>His expression changes
>For the first time
>As far as you can tell
>Sadly, it's one of annoyance
>"I don't need no exterminator. Do you now how much one costs? 140 bits! And it took me 3 days to find one that accepts bits as payment."
>He lifts up his mallet
>"This baby on the other hand. I got it for 12 bits at the flea market."
>He strokes the head gently
>You can tell that he's whispering something to it
"Couldn't you find a...lethth exthtreme way to deal with your problem?"
>"What's wrong with this one?"
"It'th gruethome! You shouldn't treat animalth like that!"
>"Pff"
>Did he just 'pff' at you?
>The nerve of him
>"I'm not killing them. I plan to sell them on the market. They'll find a good home. You know how sappy ponies get for injured animals?"
>
>
>Obviously, he has a point


>But it's still a deplorable way to make money
>"Besides, didn't batponies have a festival where the hunt down mothponies, cook them up in the town square and eat them? All the while wearing masks and throwing beads around"
"What? NO! That'th jutht a falthe rumour that wath thtarted by thome green mon..."
>"I don't care."
>You are silent
>You don't think anypony has managed to silence you so quickly
>And so efficiently
>He has a way with words
>He puts his mallet away and starts tightening the sack
>"Why are you here? Don't you have a job?"
"I do."
>Eyes closed
>Chin held high
>Hoof to the heart
>Proud smile on your face
"I"
"am a writer"
>"What do you write?"
"Love and adventure thtorieth"
>
>
>
>You open one of your eyes
>He's looking at you, unimpressed
"Paperback"
>"So, literary garbage?"
>You crack a smile
"Pretty much"
>You don't consider your writings a form of art
>One dimensional, archetypical characters
>Standard tropes
>Cliched scenarios
>Lonely, philistine demographic
>But the pay is decent
>And it takes you less than a week to write a book
>But someday soon, you will write a real work of art


>""The wings on which you carry me". Was that your book?"
"Keke...No. A friend wrote it. It ithn't any better than the usual schlock, but she doeth try."
>The room is silent
>But not in the usual way your conversations went
>It's a warmer type of silent
>A friendlier
>You can really feel that you are creating a bond with Ne-
>"Good evening, I'd like to buy a book"
>"Jesus Pony Christ! Can't anypony in this town read?!"
>"W-what?"
>You turn around and see a scared stallion at the door
>You have never lain your eyes on a more magnificent pony before
>He is beauty incarnate
>He is what philosophers of Neighlada meant by true beauty
>"We are clossed. I doubt this is the only shop in Hollow Shades. Bugger off."
>The colt runs out
>You are almost sure you heard him crying
"Why did you go and do that for?"
>"What? The store is closed!"
"You shouldn't treat your clientth like that"
>He puffs
>"It's my store"
"Forget it. Nextht time around, I exthpect you to act maturely"
>"What?"
>You don't give him and answer
>You've already ran off through the door
>In search for that godsent angel


>You are Nebulous Haze
>You are returning to your shop after a long day around the market
>You see a familiar sight
>It's that mare
>With the lisp
>Noschtiana Cloud
>She's banging at the door, yelling your name
>The sign says "Closed"
>No pony can read
>You walk towads her and position yourself right behind her
>She doesn't notice you
>She's just banging away
>Yelling
>"Nebi! Open up!"
>Barbarian
>She's just wailing away
>This goes on for about five minutes

>She sure has a lot of energy
>She finally stops and turns
>Your visage takes her aback
>She even jumps a little
>"H-hi..."
>You don't answer
>You push her lightly to the side and unlock your door
>You enter your shop
>Unorganized
>Messy
>Complete fire hazard
>It's exactly as you left it
>You should do something about that soon
>
>
>
>Soon
>You walk up to your desk and sit
>You place the bag you were holding on the floor
>You pour yourself a drink
>You take a sip and stare into your desk
>"Th-tho...how wath your day?"
>Without moving your head, you shift your eyes towards her
"Pff"
>She seems a bit nervous
>You take another sip
>And finally you turn your head towards her

"Well...have you been recently to the pet vendors?"
>"N-no"
>She still looks nervous
>Her ears are flattened
>She's bitting her lower lip
"It's horrid"
>You take another sip
"This whole day I've been trying to sell these damn raccoons"
>
>
"Night."
"And you know what my best offer was?"
>"N-no..."
"A blowjob and two lefties!"
>"Oh..."
"It's like the residents here have stopped believing in money all together"
>You kick the bag
>Noschtiana jumps a bit
>She still seems a bit under the weather
>She doesn't even comment on your cruelty
>Something isn't right with her today
>
>
>Tonight
"Anyway, what do you want?"
>You take a drink
>"C-can't I just vithit a friend?"
>You lean forward
>You look her straight in the eyes
>From underneath your eyebrows
"What do you want?"
>She gulps
>"Do you have any bookth on dating"
>Her entire face turns red the moment she utters those words
>
>
"No."
>"A-are you sure?"
>She seems desperate
"Yes."
>She looks at the ground
>Her spirit completly crushed
>You take a sip
"Why do you need a book on dating? Aren't batponies complete and utter sexual deviants, just waiting for the opportunity to desecrate any piece of flesh they see?"
>"N-no! We are nothing of the thort! Yeth, we are more thethxually liberated, but we thtill believe in love and thoul mateth a-and... "
"I'm sure you do."
>Your attitude doesn't seem to make her feel any better
>Big surprise
>
>
>
"Who's the lucky stallion?"
>Your inquiry seems to lift her spirits a bit
>Just a bit
>"Hith name ith Emerald Thky, we met latht week when you threw him out of your shop. I caught up with him and we thtarted talking and..."
"Enough! What's so special about him that you want to impress him so much?"
>"W-well, he'th really funny and thmart, and cute, and we have a lot of thingth in common and he invited me to a date and I don't want to methth thith up..."
>You look in her eyes
>
>
"Does impressing him mean all that much to you?"
>"Yeth."
>This is the most confident thing she has said all night
>You sigh
>You take a sip
>You get out of your chair and walk to a nearby box of books and start rummaging
>She follows you with a questioning expression
"I can't give you anything that will help you impress him"
>You found it
"But I can give you this."
>You take out an old, dusty book
>It's practically falling apart
>You hand it to her
>
>
>Hoof it to her
"This will help you...in a sense"
>She takes the book
>The cover is completly beige
>She opens it and reads the introductory page
>"Necronomicon: the motht advanthed teachingth in the field of black magic"
>She is shocked
>"Black magic?!"
"Don't worry. Most of the things in there don't even work."
>"But it'th black magic! Thith ith illegal! How can you have thith?!"
>She freezes
>She looks directly at you
>"A-are you a w-witch?"
"Pff...I prefer the term "Scholar of forbiden arcana""
>She still looks shocked
"It's not what you think! I work mostly in the field of theory. I barely partake in any sort of rituals."
>"B-b-but"
"But nothing! Do you want to impress that stallion or not?!"
>
>
>"...yeth"
"Alright. Turn to page 73"
>"Hypnothith: the benefitth of thrallth"
"This will help you. You won't be summmoning demons. You wont be sacrificing virgins...heh...as if there are any in this town."
>"But ithn't thith immoral. Illegal even?"
"Hypnosis is more or less convincing someone to do something for you. It's actually harder than convincing them with words, but in the long run, it's more effective. Besides, you wanted a book to help you out on your date. I gave you a book."
>She still looks nervous
>You sigh yet again
"Is it all that different than asking the right questions and wearing the right clothes? It's basically looking in his eyes and hoping that he does what you want. How is that so different?"
>"I-i don't think thith ith right"
>She's hard to convince
"Look. You are my only friend here. It looked like you really wanted to impress that guy. I just thought I should help you anyway I can."
>Those words seem to move her
>Her eyes widen and her mouth is slightly open
"I can see you think this is dangerous in some way and you may consider what I do in my free time immoral but I have good reasons for all of it"
>She's silent
>She's probably waiting for you to tell her more
"In my college days, one of my teachers saw some sort of potential in me. He introduced me to a small group consisting of a 4 other students and two other professors. We were called the bastard sons of Ar. We studied black magic and how it really worked. Why you'd need a sacrifice for a certain spell. Why is virgin blood more potent that other forms of blood. We debunked most rituals and incantations that we found. Most documented results were situational only. I'm sharing all of this with you because I consider you a friend and I hope you won't turn me to the authorities. It is my belief that something unknown shouldn't be feared, but studied."
>She slowly nods her head
"As I said, this will help you on your date. I promise it won't have any repercussions."
>"T-thank you..."
"Will you take the book?"
>
>
>"...yeth"
"Alright. 30 bits."
>"Wait, what?!"
"30 bits."
>"But that whole thpeech about your youth and exthperientheth, and friendship"
"I've got to eat, don't I?"
>
>
>"kekeke...Alright, alright."
>She gives you thirty bits
>As you take it from her, she swoops in and kisses you on the cheek
>"Thank you, Nebi. I won't tell anypony about thith"
>She walks out of the shop
>You are still standing there, motionless, blushing
>You rub your cheek
>You sit behind your desk
>You drink the remaining half of your glass in one swoop
"This will end badly"