Anon Quest: 5.1 The Lovely Mistress of Crystal

Mission #5.1 The Lovely Mistress of Crystal


As the poor Crimson Soldier slowly bleeds out on the ground, his eyes stare at the crystal embedded cavern ceiling; dazzling like a night sky, and almost comforting for a moment. This feeling is quickly broken  however, as he feels the cold hoof of Miss Pó-Serève push against his exposed chainmail. He begins to slowly fade away, as she softly whispers to him, “We could have been so much together.” He feels a pair of cold lips on his cheek, as his heart finally comes to a stop.
>Red Anon’s gazing at the ceiling, disappointed and incredibly frustrated.
“Maybe /I/ should start leading your team again,” you mockingly say to your little brother, “You started out strong, but right now the DM side is tied 3-3.
>Unable to defend himself, Anon gives a long and depressed groan, still staring at the ceiling. Twilight however, does jumps in to defend him.
>“Stop picking on Red. My older brother would never act that way towards me. He’s kind, and constructive. I didn’t even know what an “Indian Burn” was until you did it to him.”
Well, excuuuse me, /Princess/ Sparkle.
>“I told you, you don’t have to call me that,” she says slightly flustered. “The point is, Anon’s a great leader-”
That’s only won twice, and hardly makes plays for his party. If you call THAT good leadership, I might as well be the one wearing the tiara in this library.
>Applejack points across the table, at retaliates.
>“Ya know, you are getting more and more obnoxious every week! I still like ya Anon, I really do, but you’re getting as bad as Dash when she wins.”
>“Heeey!” says Dash offended.
Dash acts like a winner, and I can respect that! You ponies could learn a thing or two from her.
>She smiles at the statement, turning her gaze from you as the room becomes incredibly tense.
>Fluttershy, fearful that relationships may be damaged rises from the table and announces, “Well, this has been a very fun Friday, but I think we should maaaybe call it a night.”
>Anon yells out, “No!” surprising everyone as his head drops back to you. “Game night is supposed to end with good feels and positive vibes. I refuse to let it end like this. Rematch.”
>Dash wraps a hoof around Anon’s shoulder, pulling him to her as she yells out, “Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about!”
>As you swirl your black dice in your hand and stare at your watch, you ponder the request.
It’s already 8:56...Rarity, do you think your “beauty sleep” can wait another hour?
>“Well, I suppose so, but a minute more and I’m leaving.”
Fair enough. OKAY GANG, LISTEN UP. We’re going with the exact same mission, and the exact same classes as before, except Anon. You’re now an Undead.
>“But...I’m always a soldier. It’s my signature class.”
Deal with it. You wanted a rematch, so you're playing on my terms. You guys have until 10 to beat this mission. If you die before completing it, or your party’s total health is below the boss and her party’s, you lose. Set up your new class while I start the narration. AHEM.

---

>It is an especially cloudy and foggy day in the town of Neighagra.
>With the expectation of an eventual downpour, the streets are fairly barren, and business is low across all shops with the exception of a small tavern called the "Sweet Sarsaparelli".There, you see today’s party at a table, being served by a voluptuously plump lavender, pink maned unicorn waitress.
>Twilight the Corruptionist is having her mug of nectar refilled, with it quickly fermenting into an even more potent drink before she can even drink it. She of course is sporting her signature black Edgemaster's cloak and cursed horseshoes.
>By her left is the quick and stealthy Rainbow the Thief, wearing her green “vest of too many belts” with a mouth-dagger hanging around her neck. Having carelessly guzzled down her drink, she quickly demands another round before the waitress can leave.
>Next to her is the Floratic Rarity, wearing a simple yellow dress, and a blue ribboned hat, with holes for her rabbit like ears to pop out of. She slowly sips her drink, careful not to stain the tuft of fur around her neck.
>Then there's Applejack, the team's Guardian. Clad in a shining gray armor, she finishes her seventh drink, matching Rainbow's, and demands another round.
>Lastly, is Fluttershy the Beastmaster; dressed in her ice resistant "White Rabbit Hood". She refuses to have any drinks, fearing what may happen if her mind is compromised while using her abilities.
>Spike, being both a minor and technical pet, is forced to wait outside, leashed onto a nearby tree, hoping the rain doesn’t come early.
>"Goodness," says Fluttershy. "Pinkie sure has been gone for a while. Do you think she's found Anon yet?"
>Rarity tells her, "Don't worry, darling. It's not like Anon goes anywhere when we don't have a mission. I don't even think he leaves his home unless there's trouble."
>Twilight adds, "I can't imagine how he spends his time in that empty little house of his. We should really visit him more."
>The notion causes Dash to scoff.
>"Yeah right! Anon can barely hold a conversation, let alone hang out. I don't get how Pinkie can spend so much time with him. Nother’ refill dollface." She says shaking her mug to the waitress who takes her and AJ’s mug for a refill.
>“There’s no way Pinkie couldn’t find him. We just have to wait.”
>Eventually, after a few more minutes chatting it up, their missing partners finally appear.
>Pinkie; their bipedal, accordion playing, lederhosen wearing bard, kicks the door open, announcing to the party, "HEEERE'S ANON!"
>Anon then slowly trudges in behind her, sporting his rusted and corroded blood armor, and carrying his resharpened "Axe of Retribution". His face remains mostly hidden under his helmet, but his pale blue skin can still be seen through the openings.
"Hello, my friends," he says in his cold, dead voice as he sees their table.
>The others greet him, happy that he arrived, but with very little enthusiasm.
>"Sorry we took so long girls. I got a little distracted by Anon's new pets!"
The rats in my wall had children.
>"They were so CUTE!"
>There's a noticeable cringe from everyone aside from Fluttershy, who claims, "That's wonderful Anon."
>"I know right?! So Twilight. What's this new mission you got us together for?"
>Twilight pulls a large scroll from her satchel, unrolling it on the table, and reading it aloud.
>"WANTED: Mysterious mare seen luring foals into the greater parts of the Crystal Caverns during late nights. Over one dozen members of the Crystal Kingdom are already lost. BOUNTY: 40,000 BITS. Rewards shall be issued by Glitter Gold: Class Three Financial Consultant/Representative of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza."
>She rolls it back up, and places it in her bag.
>"Not bad," says Applejack.
>Twilight tells her, "That's around 5, 714 bits for each of us. Sounds like a fair deal if you ask me."
I will get a ride.
>Dash inquires, "Don't you at least want a drink first? The wallet I got was loaded with bits."
No.
>Anon exits without another word, petting Spike’s head with his filthy gloved hand before leaving.
>As Anon walks to Quick Finish’s  store, the ‘Rent-a-Horse’, he couldn’t help but ponder what Dash asked.
>“What IS being drunk?” he thought to himself as continued through the streets. He feels like he should know this, as if it were a thing he used to do, and used to be able to feel.
>Why, the whole thing was so perplexing, it left him wondering until finally reaching the large stables where he could make his purchase.
>As he walked through the open doors he was greeted by the owner Quick Finish; an orange earth stallion with a thick red mustache and a ten gallon hat of yellow, to hide his balding mane.
>“Well howdy Anon! Glad to see ya back at this here Rent-A-Horse. Got another one of your adventures?”
>Anon didn’t notice his welcoming comments, walking past him to the fifth stable on the right, where the team’s go to pony awaits, sitting in a wooden stool, reading a newspaper.
Hello Junebug.
>“Wha?” she says lowering the paper. “Ohhh no. Not /you/ again!”
We are going to the Crystal Empire.
>“Last time I took you and your little friends somewhere, I was almost swallowed by a mud snake.”
...I don’t recall those events happening.
>“Of course you don’t. Don’t you think one of the stronger ponies like Big Macintosh, or Berry Punch in the stable next to mine would be a better option?”
“I like you most,” he says with no change in tone.
>She gives a loud sigh, folding the newspaper neatly with her hooves, and tossing it aside.
>“I’m gonna need a cup of coffee.”

~NOON~

>Anon’s party seemed fairly ready. Due to the healing capabilities in the party, their group investment seems to be in high defense versus Red’s preferred offensive play style. Anon even chipped in a good amount of starting money on some “Capiter” based armor, capping all damage at 45 as opposed to the standard 70. Damage higher than 50 is already pretty rare, but the real Red Anon’s being extra precautious due to the destructive nature of your based black dice.
>With supplies and a reluctant pony to get them where they need, the party waits in their little caravan, as Spike guides Junebug down the dangerously steep hill the town is built on, out of town.
>It’s then that Pinkie begins softly playing her music. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3MtoLr6EQY0
>June is still very nervous about what might happen, but she is attempting to be optimistic. At least she won't have to be bothered with the scheduled downpour in Neighagra. The town is always so foggy and wet that entire days can go by without seeing the sun, so it feels kind of good to be bathed in it’s warm glow. She’d probably even prefer it if she lived in a sunny town. You notice a bit of a trot in her step as she continues walking.
>Suddenly, she begins hearing a strange noise by her sides, as if the dirt next to her is being ploughed aside.
>Having her vision obscured with blinders, Junebug turns her head to both sides, and begins to panic as she sees something slowly tunneling towards her from the top of the ground.
>The others are quick to notice Junebug picking up pace.
Hmm?
>Curious, Fluttershy looks out the left window, spotting the trail.
>“Looks like some Colony Moles heard us pass by.”
>The caravan picks up acceleration even more as Junebug begins sprinting outside.
>“Anon! Something’s chasing me! Do something!”
>“Stop running!” yells Twilight.
>“ARE YOU INSANE!” she responses. A sharp scream is then heard as a dirty claw runs across her right hind leg.
>Anon sighs, slightly frustrated.
Twilight, stop the caravan.
>Twilight’s horn gleams brilliantly, as she envelopes Junebug and the caravan in her purple aura. Her aura then turns into a pure white, the caravan takes an immediate stops, and everyone but Twilight fly forward, crashing into each other.
“...Good job,” says Anon, buried under Pinkie and Rarity.
>Spike, riding front outside, flies forward, tumbling into the grass.
>“Aaauh! Maybe a guy can get a warning next time,” he says to himself as he slowly gets back on his feet.
>He then takes a look back at the caravan, and is stupefied to see that Junebug is stunned mid run, with tears and snot frozen on her awkwardly posed face. Three giant moles in construction helmets are seen as well, turning blindly, unable to find their target in the brightness of the sun.
>One is able to slightly make out a large black figure a few feet ahead of him, but before he can figure out that’s the caravan, he’s distracted by a whooshing noise approaching him. Before he can fully duck into his hole, a dagger clangs against his helmet, cracking his neck from pure recoil.
>With a 30 defense cap on these moles, the dagger between Dash’s teeth dealt a massive sum of damage in a swift high roll.
>Mole #1 gives a loud squeakish screech, alerting moles 2 and 3 of some kind of apparent danger. Mole #2 is then attacked by a magical beam from Rarity, literally burning his soul.
>“This isn’t right. Where’s the tremor?!” thought #3 as her friend begin tunneling away. Thankfully, all three of them begin to hear some kind of ground activity, as a pair of hooves tapping at the dirt in a dance-like fashion.
>“YES!” thought #3. “Your hooligan tactics shall not deceive me.”
>The three of them eagerly rush the figure, and jump out at once, all eager to rend it apart with their claws.
>Now...Anon’s definitely put some thought into how the team’s going to work this time around. Pinkie’s ‘Chaos Accordion’ is much weaker than a ‘Battler’s Balalaika’. It can’t produce damage greater than 60, meaning that critical strikes are basically impossible. It’s a pathetic fighting tool in singular battles, but whatever damage it does produce can target up to three targets at once.
>As the three moles close in on all sides, Pinkie gives a powerful squeeze of her accordion, producing a blast of sound with a roll of 65 capping at 60. Colonist Mole #1 and 2 are quickly knocked unconscious but #3 stays conscious with her remaining 20 HP.
>“Okay. We may be a little bit outmatched. I should probably escape while I-wait, WHO’S HOOVES ARE THESE?”
>“Shhh sh-shh. It’s okay little girl,” says a soft and inviting voice as she feels her body slipping away.
>Mole #3 claws Fluttershy producing 23 damage, before her soul is slowly sucked out of her body, leaving her as an immediate corpse.
>Through 'unify', Fluttershy has successfully learned "Tremor".
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNnPooHsaOI
>If something is on the ground, changes in accuracy or evasiveness will not apply. Not the most useful ability, but Colonist Moles aren’t the most useful baddies.
>Anon looks at the scene in disappointment, clutching at his ax with nothing to chop.
>Spike then applauds the party from the sidelines.
>“Fantastic job,” says Spike.
Disappointing.
>“You said it,” says Applejack as she turns back to the caravan.
>Spike then asks as he climbs onto Junebug to hop to his seat, “Hey AJ,  what happened with Twilight?”
>“She’s using her magic to keep the caravan from moving.”
>Rarity adds, “The magic that girl can maintain is astounding.”
We’ve much ground to cover. Back to the caravan.
>With their first battle a rousing success, the party loads back into the caravan, taking note of how casual Twilight looks right now in her seat at the right middle cushion. One weeks ago, her face would’ve probably been strained red at this point.
>“Oh. You guys are back already?” she says with a smile.
I did nothing.
>Anon plops with a slouch into his spot on the back of the left side, in due time being joined by the others.
Okay, let’s go.
>Twilight’s aura dissolves and in an instant, the caravan goes back to full speed, as if it never stopped in the first place. Spike flies into the caravan, and the others topple back into each other.
>From the inside of Dash’s wing pit, Twilight yells out, “Junebug! For the love of Celestia, SLOW DOWN!”
>“NO!”
>She continues at full sprint, leaving the party to clunkily work themselves out of their pile.
>They almost manage to all get up, until a powerful force knocks against the back of the caravan, rolling them about.
>Frustrated, Dash yells out, “What now?!”
Spike, stop Junebug. Twilight, teleport!
>Spike leaps up to try and get control of Junebug, as the party is teleported out of the caravan, back to the grassy plains, to see the vehicle being pulled away in the distance, chased by another tunneling trail.
>Fluttershy tells them, “It’s probably just another mole.”
>Pinkie then extends her accordion, and yells out, “Let’s get it’s attention then!”
>She gives a powerful B-flat, loud enough to be heard a mile away, causing the trail to stop.
>There’s a brief pause, as Dash brings the dagger around her neck to her mouth, and the location of that sound is being pinpointed.
>A shockwave then occurs, as a giant mole, almost as large as the caravan the party’s riding it, pops out of the dirt, releasing a vicious roar. It’s also sporting a pair of tinted goggles, granting it vision in daylight.
>“That’s one nasty varmint,” says AJ as she digs her hooves to the ground ready to charge.
Stay back, and no one attack until my call.
>“What do ya mean don’t attack?!” she responds.
>The mole begins digging towards them as Anon calmly begins instructing.
Pinkie, buff me.
>Pinkie uses her ability, “Anthem of Virtue” to boost Anon’s next attack by 25, but with only a few seconds left before the Megaton Mole arrives, she plays it at a ludicrous speed that is hardly understandable.
>Knowing this mole won’t last an entire round against them, you activate his only ability, ‘Megaton Strike’ increasing his attack by 40, at the cost of decreasing it by 20 for the next two turns.
>You then direct his attack to Rarity, expecting Applejack to try and use ‘cover’ to take her place to try and compensate with her +10 defense.
MIRAGE.
>You didn’t expect that.
>The hairs in Rarity’s truff and tail rise as the mole’s giant claws come swinging down to her skull, but as Anon commanded, she uses her ability ‘mirage’ to quickly switch places with Anon in a fadey explosion of mist.
>You rolled an 83 to 123 attack versus Anon’s 54 defense roll, but thanks to that capital armor, the damage is only 45/100 HP. Very clever play.
>Anon’s crushed into the dirt causing everyone to be pushed back by the dirt and debris.
>Applejack quickly recovers, rolling to her feet, and ready to charge him, but before she can even get close, Anon screams out with his head barely peeking out between the claws, “WAIT FOR CALL!”
>AJ slides to a halt, as your monster continues crushing Anon.
>It’s then that Anon barely get his right hand onto the paw’s edge, and activates his undead specie’s signature ability, “Wither n’ Drain” to steal any damage he can produce.
>With a 67 to 92 attack, versus your 81 capped to 40 defense, you he steals away 52/100 HP from you, effectively recovering the damage as if nothing happened. Once again, very clever play; especially since he wasn’t going to use this class to begin with.
>As your monster becomes pale and weak, Anon announces in his victoriously bland tone.
Okay, you all can attack now.
>Applejack leaps into the air, headbutting your mole, and Dash quickly swoops in, stabbing his paw and freeing Anon. Being a thief that has to steal buffs every match, it only does a mild 12 damage, but it’s still enough to make his arm recoil in pain.
>Just like last time Fluttershy gently floats down to the beast, and with a hoof on his nose, and her stare sucking away his spirit, she tells him, “No tears now, only rest.”
>He struggles the best he can, but it’s useless by the end.
>With another successful unity, Fluttershy has learned the very destructive “Megaton Strike.”

---

>You get up from the table as you wrap up the first part of the narration
With quick planning and some ridiculous accordion playing. Anon and friends successfully defeated the great Megaton relatively unscathed. Though hidden by his helmet, a small grin is on Anons face as he rises out of his ditch. He remembers very little of his past life, but it seems as though this is what he exists for...I’m gonna get some more cucumber sandwiches, treat this break as how long it took for Junebug to get back, then we’ll continue.
>Dash tells you to, “Toss me an orange soda while you’re up.”
Whatever.