Planescape: Equestria 16

>And so you find yourself finishing up the night’s entertainments by splashing around in the clear, cold waters of a fountain in the lovely gardens of Canterlot.
>You stand beneath the icy cascade, letting it sluice over you and cleanse the sweat and grime and sticky fluids from your skin whilst you examine the marble statue that forms the fountain’s centrepiece.
>It depicts a flight of pegasi, sculpted with impressive skill to give an impression of grace and dynamism as they swoop about in battle with a giant winged monster - apparently some description of dragon.
>The dragon is swatting and snatching at the pegasi tormenting it, but its claws have found only empty air and its head is thrown back in a bellow of fiery rage.
>From that upturned head comes the spout of water which is raining down on you, making you shiver in the cool night air.
>You step back out of the torrent so that you are only wading in the surrounding pool, rubbing yourself vigorously all over both to finish the cleaning process and in an effort to warm yourself up a bit.
>You’ve only just succeeded in the latter when you hear a tremendous splash close by and find yourself gasping in momentary shock as you are suddenly drenched anew in freezing water.
>You look up to see Rarity giggling at you, looking so adorable with her mane hanging drenched and dripping around her face that you almost can’t be mad at her.

>Almost.
>You launch yourself with a battle cry and duck her under the water, holding her there for several seconds in sweet vengeance.
>You’re just letting her up, giving a shit-eating grin as she coughs and splutters, when a sudden impact from behind sends you and Rarity both back under water with Fleur’s spindly form perched triumphantly atop you.
>Some time later the three of you finally climb from the fountain, none of you – this time – taking the opportunity to shove anybody else back into the water at the risk of having a leg grabbed and being taken tumbling along with them.
>You’re all panting and giggling happily, shivering with the cold a little at first as you make your way back across the lawns to reclaim your discarded clothing.
>It must be well past midnight when you eventually approach Swan Dive’s back door again, clean and re-clothed. A spell from Rarity has dried off your hair too and put it back in a respectable style, and with a little cooperation the two mares have been able to make each other’s manes and tails look presentable.
>Rarity signals to you and Fleur to wait behind a bush as she gingerly approaches the French windows to Swan Dive’s dining room, peering inside.
>She gives you the all clear and the three of you make your way swiftly through the still lit but now deserted house, only running into Woodhouse – or whatever the butler’s name actually is – who gives you a thoroughly contemptuous ‘hmph’ but otherwise stays out of your way.
>Swan Dive must be the bearer of the Element of Discretion, you decide; not as glamorous as the Elements of Harmony, maybe, but a quality much to be respected nonetheless.

>You part ways with Fleur a ways down the street as she reaches the turnoff for her home.
>The pink-and-white unicorn scrapes awkwardly at the floor with a hoof, her embarrassment obviously returning in full force as you say your goodbyes.
>You kneel down and give her a big hug, leaning back in as you disengage to kiss her swiftly on the lips and make her blush fiercely.
>Rarity follows suit exactly, and Fleur gives a pleased sigh that turns quickly into an awkward cough.
“It was simply lovely to catch up, darling,” Rarity says with perfect social grace. “We must do this again sometime. Oh, and I’m so glad that you and Anonymous were able to work through your differences.”
>She pauses for a moment to give Fleur a chance to reply, but she still seems off-balance so Rarity continues.
“Well then – goodbye for now, darling. Goodnight, and sweet dreams.”
“…yeah. Goodnight Rarity. And Anonymous. Um, nice to meet you.”
>She subtly changes her stance to a more studiedly elegant pose; you take that to mean she’s more or less herself again.
>Rarity gives Fleur another brief hug and then walks away as you fall into step.

“She’s going to be okay to get home, right?” you ask with a trace of worry once you and Rarity are some distance away.
“Oh, such a gentleman,” Rarity says, looking over with a smile.  “But don’t worry a bit. This isn’t Sigil – the streets of Canterlot are awfully safe. She’ll be absolutely fine.”
“Good.”
>There are several questions you could be asking Rarity now – questions addressing issues like what the fuck just happened, whether you should expect it to happen again, how you are supposed to act around the other ponies, and so on and so forth.
>Walking back towards the palace alongside her, though, your head still buzzing and your body aching pleasantly, none of those questions seem very germane or urgent.
>It is what it is, you guess.
>Her hoofsteps echo down the tree-lined midnight streets as you make your way back to the palace, the two of you drawing curious glances from the odd couple or group of pony revellers who go by.
>You pass by a late-opening café where ponies sit out on the terrace sipping drinks and strains of jazz music drift out into the streets from the open windows.
>She seems content to walk close by your side in companionable silence, presumably wrapped up in her own thoughts.

>Arriving back in your suite at the palace you find Twilight asleep on the sofa, a blanket draped over her.
>On the coffee table in front of her is an empty bottle of wine, two glasses – one of them half full – and a chess board with the game still in progress.
>You pause a moment to take in the state of the pieces. They’re not the designs that you’re most familiar with, but once you realise that what look like knights are actually pawns, you realise it must be the same rules after all.
>The knights, in turn, look to be stylised pegasi with lances, whilst the bishops are robed unicorns and the king and queen look to have been replaced, predictably, by two princesses.
>You conclude that they’re in a complex deadlock: still anybody’s game.
>As for her opponent, you guess he must have taken his leave after tucking her in.
>You and Rarity share a smile at the adorable picture.
>She motions you down to one knee with a gentle hoof on your waist, and leans in to whisper in your ear.
“Thank you for a delightful evening, darling. Goodnight.”
“And thank you. Goodnight, Rarity.”
>She kisses you lightly on the lips and then makes for her room, hips swaying alluringly as always.
>She turns to give you a smile from the doorway before entering and closing the door behind her, leaving you to find your own bed and sink into a deep, contented slumber.
>You are woken briefly a few hours later by a crash of something in the living room and a fit of giggling which you take to mean that Pinkie has just got in, but you soon drop back to sleep and don’t wake again until mid-morning.

>There is a faint tinkling of breakfast china and quiet female voices in conversation from the living room.
>You lie dozing, listening to the hum of their voices contentedly for some time without picking up any actual words, but soon the smell of fried eggs and mushrooms is making your stomach rumble so you quit the luxurious comfort of your bed to jump under the shower and make yourself presentable enough to join the ponies for breakfast.
>You find Twilight Sparkle and Rarity on the balcony seated around a table laid with a linen cloth, silver cutlery and tea-things sparkling in the morning sun.
“Good morning, Anonymous!” Twilight calls out as you make your appearance.
“Morning,” you return cheerfully as Rarity turns around to give you a friendly smile.
“Good morning, Anonymous,” she says in cordially polite tones.
>You take one of the two empty seats and Rarity magically lifts the teapot to pour you a cup.
“Rarity has been telling me about last night,” Twilight says, her tone bright but neutral.
“Oh, really?” you ask, your face a polite blank.
“Yes! She said you made quite an impression on some of Canterlot’s social elite.”
“Oh, well, I don’t know,” you say with a smile. “Maybe one or two of them.”
“At any rate, it sounds as if you two had a pleasant evening.”
“Yeah – well, I enjoyed myself.”

“Great! I don’t really have much of a head for that sort of thing myself, but I’m glad Rarity was able to show you a good time.”
>You keep your voice breezy and resist the urge to give Rarity a look or charge your tone with innuendo: that would be distinctly un-classy.
>You can’t resist a puerile inner snicker, though.
“Yeah, she certainly did. How was your evening?”
“Oh, it was just lovely, thank you. We caught up over dinner and then came back here for a few games of chess. I finally won a game against Shining Armor! But he won the next one, and then I… might have drifted off a little bit before we finished the decider.”
“Oh well,” you smile. “Should be time to settle the grudge match before we leave Canterlot, right?”
“I hope so! He’s captain of the royal guard, so his duties do keep him busy. But he said something about inviting us all round for dinner with him and Cadence – er, Princess Cadence, that is – tomorrow, if we can manage it. I’d really like to go.”
“Of course we’ll go, darling,” Rarity puts in. “We could hardly turn down such a flattering invitation. Your brother is royalty, now, you know.  By the way, Anonymous, help yourself to the toast and some mushrooms and scrambled eggs, if you like – there’s plenty to go around and these dishes do a marvellous job of keeping them hot.”
“Oh, thanks.” You start loading your plate. “But, hang on a moment. Your brother is married to a princess, Twilight?”

“Yes! Cadence, proper title Princess Cadenza mi’Amore. Foal-sitter extraordinaire.”
“Hmm. So if she’s a princess... she’s Celestia and Luna’s sister, too?”
“No, no. She’s… some sort of cousin, I think, lots of times removed. She calls them auntie, but her mother isn’t their sister either. The royal family tree is pretty convoluted, and there are big gaps where we don’t have the history for one reason or another.”
“…seriously? Why wouldn’t somep0ny have written that stuff down?”
“I know! Tell me about it,” Twilight says heatedly. “Ponies have been SO BAD in the past at keeping all kinds of history. Only a few scholars even bothered to try, and then their books ended up dusty and unread in the corner of a library somewhere while most ponies pass down myths and legends instead. You wouldn’t believe how hard it can be to work out what actually happened.”
 “So how do you even keep track of who’s royalty? I mean, wouldn’t it be easy for anyp0ny to fabricate a claim?”
“Not really,” Rarity puts in. “Real breeding always shines through, you know – and anyway, the Princesses would never allow an impostor. In Princess Cadence’s case it would be somewhat hard to dispute, since she’s a pure bred alicorn – there aren’t any of those outside of royalty, you know.”
“Ah. But there are some royals who aren’t alicorns?”
“Oh, yes.”
“Like Prince Blueblood,” Twilight chips in.
“Yes,” Rarity says in a suddenly very cold tone as Twilight blushes, apparently just realising that she put her hoof in her mouth. “Like… him.”

“So Princess Celestia and Princess Luna are the only ones of their generation?”
“That’s right,” Twilight nods.
“What about their direct descendants? Any of their children about?”
“I don’t know of any,” Twilight says pensively.
“Nor I,” Rarity adds.
“Any records of any?”
“…no.”
“Hmm.”
>You rub a hand on your stubbly chin, considering that. Something to ask one of the Princesses about if you get the chance, maybe – although you wonder if enquiring into mysteries like that is really a smart manoeuvre in your position.
>Of course you’re going to do it anyway, asking you not to enquire into mysteries is like asking a dog not to lick its own balls.
>Always nice to be aware of when you’re doing something stupid, though.
>Any idiot can do stupid stuff without realising it.

>A few minutes later and you’re replete, sipping your second cup of tea in the sunshine while the conversation has turned to plans for the day – some sightseeing seems to be in order, and Twilight and Rarity are brainstorming about the various locales they need to take you on your tour of Canterlot.
>Pinkie Pie appears in a flash of bouncy pink poofiness, rapidly collecting all the remaining food onto her plate in a big pile even as she is greeting you all.
“Good morning!” she sings out. “Did everyp0ny have a good night? I had the BEST night! Vinyl’s set was -amazing-, and there were so many cool ponies there, I made like a MILLION new friends, and everyp0ny kept handing me jell-o shots, and you KNOW how I feel about jell-o, and Vinyl had some candy that made everything go, like, WHOOOOOOSH and hehehehe it was so much fun!”
>The thought of Pinkie on stimulants causes a momentary shiver of terror to run down your spine.
“Sorry about waking you up Twi,” she goes on. “I thought you’d be in bed so the couch would be free for jumping on, but it turns out it wasn’t so I jumped on you instead. My bad!”
“That’s okay,” Twilight says, smiling weakly. “At least you woke me up so I could get to bed instead of sleeping on the couch all night, I'd probably be all stiff this morning if that had happened. Of course, I'm kind of stiff anyway from when you jumped on me...”

“So anyway!” Pinkie says through a mouth full of toast and mushrooms, “Vinyl can DJ for a party at the palace tonight, isn’t that great? And she’s going to bring Octavia, too, they’ve been working on some kind of collaboration and it sounds suuuper amazing. I’ve already asked a royal guard to ask Princess Celestia to send a note to Spike so he can let Rainbow know. Oh, and like a hundred ponies or something said they’d come and bring everyone they know. You’re going to make so many new pony friends, Anon!”
“Sounds like it’s going to be quite something,” you say cheerfully, casting glances at Twilight and Rarity in the hopes of getting some clue on what to expect.
 “Well, that sounds excellent,” Twilight says. “I’ve been studying so hard recently, and then this special mission from the Princess - it’ll be great to unwind and let my mane down, although it’s really too bad that Fluttershy and Applejack won’t be there.”
“Yes, it sounds lovely, Pinkie darling,” Rarity smiles. “I’m sure Anonymous will appreciate the chance to see the livelier side of Canterlot’s nightlife, too.”
>From what you’ve see of her so far the idea of a Pinkie-planned event had filled you with a certain amount of trepidation, giving you unpleasant flashbacks to Xaositect raves (concerning which: NEVER AGAIN), but the other ponies’ responses help to put you at ease.
>Maybe she really is capable of forethought and impulse control, if only when it comes to planning parties.
>The evening’s prospects are looking up.