Dib approached his locker to see that once again it had been defaced. Someone had stuffed their cafeteria gruel into the holes and written “FAGGOT” in sharpie across the front of it. A year ago this would have pissed Dib off but he couldn’t be bothered to be angry at his classmates plebeian shenanigans anymore. He grabbed his books and made his way towards his next class.

Torque and Zita were making out in the hall in some grand gesture of affection. How simple. He couldn’t help but smirk at how average the two of them were. A dull human relationship locked within the bounds of a dull sex life and a dull marriage someday. And the saddest thing about it all was they would never know what they were missing.

Playing the of the good student, the uninspiring human, Dib sat through all his classes listening to lectures about facts he already knew. Finally the bell rang releasing him from his prison and he practically ran home.

He entered his house and waved to Gaz who didn’t return the motion. Getting some soda from the fridge he started up the staircase to his room. While he was ascending he was surprised to hear Gaz call up to him and acknowledge his presence for once.

“You know I don’t care enough to do anything... but you’re sick in the head, Dib.”

He stopped climbing for a second.

“Gaz, I’m sure from a outside view it seems-”

“I said I don’t care moron!”

Realizing he wouldn’t get any more conversation out of her Dib continued to his room. He slammed the door shut and took a deep breath. Right, he had a date to get ready for.

Before he could shower he needed to make sure the Swollen Eyeballs hadn’t shared any important cases with him. With Zim’s disappearance he had been able to focus on other paranormal incidents and gain a bit more respect from them. While going through his computer he noticed an icon that had long been left untouched in the corner of the screen. He had enjoyed his cryptid dating sims when he was younger but he now knew they would never compare to the real thing.

Dib showered quickly and went back to the kitchen to grab something. He pulled a water bottle out of the bottom and rack and stuffed it in his coat pocket. He hadn’t needed it in over a month but it was always better to be safe.

With that he took a deep breath and headed outside towards the shed outback. He wasn’t even aware the shed had an old unused lab basement until two years prior. He was pretty fortunate his dad said he had no use for it and let him take it as his own. He was even more fortunate his dad was too busy to investigate what he might be doing in there. Dib was sure eventually he would come around to seeing that helping an alien who was stranded on earth was a good scientific endeavor. But he wasn’t ready to approach him with the whole “aliens exist” deal anytime soon.

He pressed a code into the keypad locking the semi hidden door in the shed and began his descent into the basement. He tried to keep his lab fairly clean but had a tendency to leave things chaotic enough that he felt comfortable. He preferred to work down here instead of up in his room. Dib’s eyes lit up as he saw the bed with a blanket fort lovingly made around it in the corner of the room.

There she was.

Tenn’s makeup was smudged a bit and one of her antennas was losing its curl but she would always look cute to Dib. While she had quite a few outfits she wore for him, she was wearing her invader uniform today. It gave Dib a sense of pride to know that he was the only human that would ever be intimate with an advanced species.

He hated that he had to chain her up but it was at her own request. After all she was prone to nervous spasms that would destroy nearly half his lab if not kept in check. She let out a muffled choking sound as he approached her. It really was tragic she had her voicebox torn out and lost her ability to speak.

“Torque and Zita were slobbering on each other in the hall today. I told you about them before- big brainhead football player and conformist bitch.”

Tenn was trying desperately to say something but like always it came out as unintelligible choking. Dib raised his hand to stroke her antenna. She stopped in her attempt to speak and snapped her mouth close. It was adorable how resistant she was to showing any signs of enjoying his affection. Yet no matter how she tried her antennas were so sensitive that she couldn’t stop the little sounds she would eventually make.

Dib began to move his face closer to her before holding up the water bottle and shaking it to show her.

“If you bite me you know what happens...”

He pressed his lips against hers and was met with a familiar cold smoothness. Picking up momentum he forced his tongue into her mouth. She was unresponsive as he deeply kissed. She never responded. Always just sat there and let him work his work into her mouth. While continuing to kiss her he reached down to put his hand into her black tights.

Dib squeezed her red slender cock and she hissed. He had never had any sort of homosexual urges before he met Tenn but after some searches on the internet he came to think dick wasn’t so bad as long as it was attached to a pretty girl.

He glanced up to smile at her. Oh he remembered the pure revulsion in those eyes. Zim used to look at him like that whenever Dib messed with his plans or tried to expose him. But Zim was dead now.

Dib didn’t have to worry about him trying to destroy humanity ever again.