Tugging at My Heartstrings 4

>Canterlot was just as you remembered it.
>A majestic castle as the centerpiece of a large city on the cliff face.
>You smile to yourself and wonder if all the specifics of the castle are the same across dimensions.
>>”Anon, we’ll be there soon now!”
>You didn’t know why she preferred to take the train over a teleport,
>Well, it’s just so easy, why waste bits?”
 >>Neat.
>>”Oh don’t be such a spoil-sport. This is practically NECESSARY. I haven’t been here since…”
>”The public outing…”
>Oh great, she made herself sad.
 >>Hey, cheer up Lyra. I’m sure whatever happened is in the past.
>>”Yeah, you’re right.”
>She seems to have regained some of her childlike enthusiasm to make her reports to the science club…
>Or whatever they were.
>Blah blah Canterlot blah blah school blah blah blah prestigious blah.
>You weren’t mean-spirited, it’s just hard to get excited over stuff like this.
>And you were the smartest human on Earth there, for a little.
>Last human, smartest.
>Same difference.
>>”Alright, we’re here. Let’s leave calmly and collectedly.”
>You straighten up, adjusting cuff lengths on your suit.
>You cast a glance over your shoulder to Lyra when you see it.
>Her.
>A splotch of purple dives for cover behind a large suitcase.
>You walk towards it, but there is nothing beyond the box.
>>”What’s wrong?”
 >>Thought I saw somep0ny.
>>”Well I don’t think whoever it is could possibly be any more important than our first impression, so let’s go go go!”
>She is smiling.
>You hold onto the railing as the train slides to a stop on the inside of the city walls.
>Surprisingly there is no crowd at the stop.
 >>Uh, this was the place, right?
>>”Yeah…”
>You are the first out of the door as it slides open, and you extend a hand back towards Lyra in a gentlemanly fashion.
>She takes the offered arm with a hoof and steps out onto the train station.
>You check again for the purple mystery p0ny…though you’re pretty sure you know who it is.
>>”This…I…”
>She’s disappointed.
 >>So you expected a big crowd…it’s ok. Maybe they’re preparing your place for the speech and lecture at the institute…or my…” you gulp for effect “…examination.”
>She chuckles at your expense and bumps into you, taking her hoof back to walk freely about.
 >>So is there time to get a tour, or head directly to go and collect 200 bits?
>She rolls her eyes.
>>”We’ll just go straight there. The sooner the better, and we can see what we’re gonna do afterwards.”
>Fine by you.
>Canterlot’s streets are thankfully less active than usual.
>Not only does this allow you to pass by with a lot less blanching and retching upper-crust ponies than usual, but you can clearly tell you’re being tailed by purplesmart.
>There’s a reason she was purplesmart and not purplestealth.
>You sigh to yourself.
>While you were always looking forward to meeting Lyra…THIS Lyra, you had gotten sick of running into all the off-the-wall element bearers along the way.
>Kind of hoping that maybe yours would be NORMAL.
>And they were, you supposed. Each element bearer was rational in their actions.
>Except for Twili-no, actually she had an excuse.
>First human ever with a language barrier. Spells to understand not only fail but Discord’s voice appears, and you can UNDERSTAND what he says.
>After dealing with all that Discord and changeling nonsense, she had every right to overreact, you suppose.
>Once she stops stalking you, you’ll tell her she’s forgiven.

>Here you are, Canterlot Science something something.
>No t being able to read was going to make things very boring in your future.
>A team of ponies in labcoats come up to you and Lyra, but don’t even turn towards you.
>”Greetings, Heartstrings. Your discovery will come with us for examination and testing. Somep0ny will be with you shortly.”
>”Oh…alright…”
>You cross your arms and wait for a translation.
>>”They’re here for you.”
>They are still only facing Lyra.
 >>Pfft. I’m sure.
>She gives you an annoyed look and you walk to the white-coated herd.
>Without a word they turn back towards the institute.
“Least you could do is act like I’m here.”
>No response.
“Or like, I don’t know, an adult? A living being? Man, what IS it you mooks are treating me like? I know it it’s on the tip of my tongue…”
>You pause to see if they have noticed you talk.
>Apparently not.
>You continue the one-sided conversation.
“So I said to her:oatmeal are you crazy!? How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck had a boner? Is a zombie’s fetish oral sex or vore?”
>You consider getting more vulgar, but not a single reaction is to be had.
>And it pisses you off
“Hey! You could at least LOOK AT ME, jackasses!”
>”Hello professors.”
>”Ah, Twilight Sparkle, what are you doing here?”
>Twilight Sneakle steps from behind a door, with a horrible look of false surprise on her face.
>”And what’s this? Anonymous? What ever could you be doing here?”
“Do you expect me to answer or what? Tell me. Oh wait, no comprende whateverthehell I speak.”
>”I assume none of you can understand him.”
>”He won’t shut up.”
>So he can talk to anyp0ny else, but won’t even look at you?
>What a dick.
>”Well he understands tonal and musical cues, if communication is a must.”
>”Tell him to shut up.”
>She recoils, but regains her composure.
>”I’m afraid I don’t know which is which, but he also understands pantomime.”
>”I’m waiting.”
>”Aheh-heh-heh…”
>After clearing her throat, Twilight waves to you, then motions a hoof across her face with a zipping sound effect.
>Oh, they want you to be quiet.
>You nod and repeat the zip motion.
>She smiles.
>”All there was to it.”
>”Fascinating, now go away.”
>She looks emotionally struck.
>”I am here on behalf of Princess Celestia to oversee Anonymous’ reports.”
>”No you aren’t, you pulled that line before years ago. We won’t fall for it again. If you really want to see what it can do, just wait until Miss Heartstrings has finished her evaluation and presentation. After that we will make known to p0nykind what this human monster is capable of.”
>”Well firstly, he’s capable of advanced technology that runs off of electricity. He can even teleport. Secondly, Anonymous is his name, and he’s a male.”
>”IT is the only representation of its kind. Its civilization and technology are not to be evaluated at this time. Good day, miss Sparkle.”
>”Bu-“
>”I said Good DAY.”
>Getting snubbed by the scientists, Twilight frowns and starts heading to another area of the institute, presumably Lyra’s presentation hall.
>You wave goodbye.
>She halfheartedly returns it in time to see you make faces at the silent group.
>Suppressing a giggle she heads off.
>You dunno what they said, but they were quite monotone. It definitely did not help your opinion of them.

>Inside the building you see various hospital and science lab-type objects. Wires, boxes, computers and monitors adorn the walls and various tables.
"It's a regular hospital in here, ain't it? I knew there was tech in this Equestria, but this is a LOT of tech."
>One of the stallions of the group facehooves.
>"I thought miss Sparkle told him to shut up. Now it seems she is even a failure there as well."
>"Relax, the beast is obviously too stupid to keep ahold of a concept for long. It probably stole the technology as well."
>They lead you into a room with loads of standard doctor's checkup lists.
>Charts for ponies, minotaurs, even a basilisk chart hang on the walls.
>You walk over and pop a squat onto the medical table and swing your legs back and forth.
"So, what's up doc? Give it to me straight, how long do I have to live?"
>"Somp0ny shut it up!"
>One finally faces you.
"About damn time."
>You glare into their beady little eyes with a thirst for vengeance.
>Well, his eyes are large, but whatever.
>As he meets your glare, his eyes shrink to pinpricks, and his face turns to fear.
"Do you fear, kid?"
>"S-sir, he...i don't like the look he's giving me..."
>As another finally faces you you make the most cheesy grin with your eyes closed.
>"He looks like an idiot."
>"Colts, stop referring to the subject as male. We will know for ourselves upon examination!"
>That one has a mad look in his eyes.
"Somehow, I don't think I'm going to like this..."
>>2937144
>The ponies end up motioning for you to remove your suit.
"Cheeky, huh? I bet you're just getting off to this somehow."
>You slip out of the shirt portion and they attack various arcano-tech monitors to you.
"Nnnneat."
>Various tests involve running, jogging in place, punching a bag, lifting things, pushing large objects and benchpressing.
>You weren't the most active man on Earth...oh wait, technically you were.
>Your laughter at your internal joke causes you to slip a bit with the large weighted bar.
>Your "spotter" yelps and jumps back.
>You just teleport out of the way like nothing's wrong.
"Yeah, thanks for the help, four-hooves."
>They never meet your gaze again, or speak to you, always just pointing to the various tests and machines.
>Finally, after a half an hour, your little suction cups with wires on them are removed from your chest.
>You replace the shirt.
"Hey, was it good for you too?"
>Man, being able to get away with saying this stuff was a riot.
>"Alright, so his physical testing is done, let's see what we can do about the psychological...after this blood test."
>One pony quickly jabs you with a needle, and takes it back out before you can say:
"Ouch! What the fuck, man?"
>He places the needle within a small tube and seals it.
>"And this hair sample."
"Ow."
>"And a skin sample."
>A scalpel is lifted into the air and pointed at you.
"Hey! Don't you go pointing knives boy. Violence is a two way street."
>While the knife has your attention, a pony behind you scratches you head and takes the dandruff.
>Uhhh...maybe you should get that fixed some time.
>Levitating that away, the dudes bring you to a restroom and hoof you a cup.
>You blink.
"I swear officer, I was just holding that weed for a friend."
>They, like always, don't react, so you do your business and return the piss-filled cup.
"Drink up, buttercup."
>Okay, even if they can't understand you, maybe you should tone down the witty one-liners.
>This ain't your daddy's superhero comic book.
>...oh dammit, there you go again.
>With a sigh, you follow the doctors to yet another room.
"At least Lyra is enjoying herself..."

>Lyra, is in fact, not enjoying herself.
>The crowd of scientists and xenoenthusiasts are all…awkwardly quiet.
>”Uhh…well that concludes my report on Humans as a society and behavioral activities…are there any questions?”
>A cough echoes in the hall.
>10 seconds pass.
>”…anyp0ny?”
>Deafening silence fills the room, and Lyra steps down from the podium and begins to trot away, head held low.

>Your psychological evaluation ends on an expected note.
>”He’s of average IQ, no antisocial tendencies, no violent actions, and learns rapidly, even without use of language.”
>”Not bad. Bring IT back to the front of the building to return to ITS owner.”
>You’re led back through the halls and ejected into the now-dark Canterlot.
“Hey, watch the cotton, ya swab.”
>You shove your hands in your pockets, and stand around, waiting for Lyra to get back.
>Minutes later, the mint unicorn comes out from another door…and she doesn’t look well.
 >>Hey Lyra…you ok?
>>”No, Anon…I’m…I just want to go home…”
>You pop a squat to be eye level with her and run your hand down her back.
>>”This was supposed to be the happiest day of my life…it’s not fair…”
 >>Hey now, you’re not married yet.
>She gives you a deadpan glare.
>>”I’m serious, Anonymous…I even had the princess’ support! If this is how my life is going, I won’t get my job back and all I’ll have to show for it is an interdimensional bunk buddy!”
“…”
>>”It’s just not fair, Anon…and I’m sorry.”
 >>The hay are you sorry for? You’re a brilliant mare and my friend.
>As much as you’d like to be more…
>She sniffles and presses into your hand as you stroke her back.
>>”Well thank you, Anon. Let’s just go home now.”

>The day is brought to a close as you heft the sleeping unicorn from the train station, teleporting directly into the living room, startling Bon Bon.
>You forgot you could have teleported in the first place, but now that she’s asleep, you weren’t going to wake her up.
>She looks so calm now…nothing like how she was after that presentation.
>”Anonymous…how did it go?”
“Still can’t understand you, kiddo.”
>Bon Bon scrunches her face.
>”Fffffff…that look on your face does not inspire confidence.”
>She motions with a hoof and you follow her to Lyra’s room and place her in the bed.
>”No…”
>She grasps your arm with her hooves (what the actual fuck) and prevents you from leaving…unless you Jump, teleporting out of her grasp.
>But…why would you do a dumb thing like that?