shining armor shits him self (oneshot)

Anon and Twi have been dating for awhile and are both happy. Word gets to Shining, who feels the need to give Anon the 'I'm the big brother' talk.
Catch is, Shining doesn't know that Anon is a human, AKA a carnivore who's twice his size and probably three times his weight.
When Shining shows up, he quickly finds himself scared shitless of Anon, but Shining is still determined to try and assert himself as the 'tough older brother'
It's a nerve-wracking affair for him.
Bonus points if this is post Wedding, with Cadence being perfectly comfortable around Anon as well.

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"What do you mean your brother wants to meet me? I was at his wedding..."
>"He was brain washed remember? He has a hard time remembering things around that time."
>you shake your head, pretty shabby excuse but what ever.
>"He said he really wanted to speak with you, and that its important seeing as how you're dating his sister."
"He has a sister?" you say jokingly.
>"Yes!" Twilight clearly not catching your joke and beginning to get irritated.
>Silence.
"Is she hot?" you decide to push the joke farther.
>Twilight glares at you before cracking a small smile as she begins to understand.
>She shakes her head before leading you around a corner.
"Love butt is gonna be there right?"
>"Do you have to call her that?" she groans.
"Well she touched my butt so yes."
>She glares at you again before shaking her head.
>"Too far Anon." is her only comment.
"Alright, sorry, is she going to be there?"
>"I think so, I wouldn't mind seeing Cadance."
"I know specially after that threesome-"
>"ANONYMOUS!" Twilight screams.
>You just crack up laughing
"I'm done I'm done." you throw your arms up to protect your head from what ever object Twilight has armed herself with.
>Another groan and said object is dropped with thunk.
>"Almost there, can you please behave."
"Of course of course, just getting it out of my system."
>Twilight shakes her head but has a rather large grin on her face.
"your mom-"
>"Finish that sentence and I will destroy you." Twilight clearly not accepting your bullshit anymore.
"...Is a very nice lady." you squeak out.
>Deciding you have pushed enough buttons you enjoy the rest of the walk Twilight
>Reaching Twilight's parents house you roll around with the idea of just kicking the door down and diving in saying Twilight threw you in.
>Her mom may believe you but her dad would have you pay for the door.
>Joking aside you knock on the door three times.

>"They're here!" your mother sings.
>You are shining armor, and your little sister has gotten her self a boyfriend.
>This is fine and dandy but this colt needs to understand exactly who hes dealing with!
>Shining armor, Captain of the guard.
>"Coming Shining?" Your wife Cadance trots past you.
>Twilight's first boyfriends... at least that shes openly told you...
>You would like to think she doesn't hide anything
>Shaking thoughts aside you trot out of your room as you hear everyone greeting Twilight and this mystery stallion.
>Turning the corner your heart stops.
>Your happy to see Twilight, but what shes leaning agianst, is giant!
>Like how did he get through the door?
>And why is your mom giving him a kiss on the cheek "saying its great to see you again"?!
>Your wife Cadance is even giving him a hug...
>The creature takes its attention off of your mother and wife to focus on you.
>"Hey Shining, remember me?"
>Slight pain rolls through your head as you try to search for a name.
>Strangely nothing comes up.
"I can't say that I do..."
>your confidence is shot as this strange creature grows to an even bigger size as it stands up fully.
>"His memory is a bit foggy when it comes to things that happened around the wedding."
>"Yeah, Twilight mentioned something like that, anyway I'm Anonymous, you can call me Anon for short or if you wish you can call me the sexy-" Hes cut off as a purple glow holds his lips shut.
>"You said you were done!" hisses Twilight.
>Anon takes one of his claw like fingers and scratches the inside of Twilight's ear causing her magic to let up as she releases a coo.
>Cadance and Mom giggle at this as they move the little gathering to the living room.

>"So Anonymous what have you been up to?" Cadance starts immediately
>"Eh, bit of this bit of that. Lounging around the house doing nothing."
>Twilight nudging him in the side causing him to jump.
>"Ow, Twilight pays for everything." he blurts out.
>She nudges him harder again
>"Pick up various odd jobs, helping Applejack with apples or derpy with the mail."
>The girls all giggle, you attempt to laugh them but only to find it awkward.
>The day goes on till Father comes home.
>He doesn't seem as interested in Anonymous as he locks him self in his office.
>Eventually dinner time comes around, everyone moves to the table where various plates of very delicious looking food is waiting.
>an odd looking dish catches your eye.
"Whats this?" you gesture at it with a hoof."
>"Hm?" Mother takes a bit to notice. "Oh! Fish, Anonymous-" You don't hear the rest of her sentence as you stare at the dish.
>You've tried meat, something you hated.
>And this creature your sister is dating eats it?!
>Dinner went by rather quickly, not quietly but you couldn't focus.
>Glancing at him you just started shivering.
>The way he ate and how much it was disgusting, how can Twilight find this creature attractive?!
>Dinner ends and Twilight and Anon get ready to head back home.
>"Oh shining! didn't you-" Twilight starts.
>You begin shaking your head violently
>"Want to talk-"
>FOR THE LOVE OF CELESTIA TWILLY NO
>"Anonymous?" twilight finishes her sentence, your body feels like its going to fall over.
>You can feel your heart rate racing as you glance at Anonymous.
>"Oh that's right, do you have a place we can speak in private? unless you want to talk here."
>You can't respond.

>Cadance seems to pick up on you freezing.
>"Uh you guy's can use the kitchen."
>Your wife has abandoned you, shes tossed you to the wolves.
>Nodding your head slowly you try to work yourself up.
>Its alright, your captain of the guard.
>Following Anonymous into the kitchen.
>Captain of the guard, you have lead men on missions and returned with everyone alive!
>You go over various things slowly regaining your confidence.
>Then Anonymous turns around.
>"So you wanted to talk to me?"
>You can feel your body begin to fail as a rather loud 'plop' is heard behind you.
>Both of you sit there in silence for a rather large amount of time till he tilts to the side looking passed you.
>"Alright well, this has been the most enlightening conversation of my life. It was good chatting with your Shiny and I hope to see you next what ever pony holiday.
>Anonymous holds his breath as he walks around you and out the door.
>You don't hear the good byes being said but you hear the door open and close.
-
>"so what did my brother want to talk to you about?"
"Shit."
>"Anonymous!" Twilight is never happy with your swearing.
"Poop."
>"Anon..." She growls.
"He pulled me aside to go silent and shit on the floor Twilight, what else do you want from me? I just watched your brother shit on your parents floor, fuck."
>Twilight has stopped walking entirely.
>Stopping you turn around waiting for her.
>Eventually she adopts a smile and forces a laugh thinking your joking.