Spirit Eyes - Progress?

[21:17] Lemuria Augustus says, "So. Could you explain to me what your issue was last time? If you care to share."
[21:17] Lavinia scratches her cheek with her drakan claws. Grindy grind.
(Lavinia Walters)
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[21:18] Lavinia Walters says, "S'pose I just wanted to take 'em memories and get angry when it didn't work as intended."
[21:18] Lavinia Walters says, "It's how people 'round me work most of the time."
[21:18] Lavinia Walters says, "Kinda just take 'cause they can."
[21:25] Anger. Frustration. The bane of all things spiritual. Anger causes thoughts to circle through one's mind at a pace too fast to truly keep up with, and leads to immense difficulty in clearing one's mind.

So, if nothing else, it made sense that she struggled so much.

"Well, as I laid out for you yesterday, that is in fact a valid method to attain this."

Her eyes shone blue, as she gazed upon the ruins to see the spirits around the two of them.

"Would you prefer that method, or my method?"
(Lemuria Augustus)
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[21:30] The non-verbal on this dark drakan was that of a nervous child's. She was an adult, sure, but a young one that hadn't exactly been in the healthiest of relationships. Hands rubbed against one another, her gaze somewhat avoidant as she recalled the last time she was here. Lavinia was ashamed.

"I- . . . "

Lips pursed, she crossed her arms and took a moment to think. Nervous ticks such as cheek scratching and little 'tsk' sounds were frequent. A good minute passed until she'd give an answer.

"I wanna try your way, Teach. I think I gotta try a better way. Can you please show me again? I wanna do this right."
(Lavinia Walters)
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[21:37] Lemuria nodded in response.

"There are three major types of spirits, all of which exist within these ruins: Nature spirits, human spirits, and dark spirits. Each one communicates in their own specific ways, too, until you can see them clearly. Nature spirits alter your emotions, human spirits often alter your thoughts, and dark spirits do both with a decidedly negative bend."

"The difficulty in understanding spirits comes from the fact that you must have the self awareness necessary to discern which thoughts are truly your own. Then, you must pinpoint which thoughts and feelings are anomalous to discern whether or not spirits are trying to speak to you."

"Any questions? Or shall I explain the exercise?"
(Lemuria Augustus)
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[21:41] Arms crossed, she managed to pose her posture adamantly and reduce her ticks for now. Listening attentively, the confident Lavinia that had first walked here the other day was exchanged for a more disciplined one. It seemed that failure had humbled her, along with maybe a few other things.

"I understand, yes. I think I'm ready to hear the exercise. And maybe guidance on how Heidi did it so well. She saw somethin' interestin'."

She nodded, her tail swaying from left to right in a calm, rhythmic manner.
(Lavinia Walters)
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[21:48] "The exercise is to sit down, allow yourself to meditate, and, effectively, observe your thoughts and feelings."

"Heidi did it so well because I instructed her on how to notice the manner in which each individual type of spirit attempts to speak to you. She had to discern the stories the spirits were trying to tell, utilizing the symbols that human spirits gave her, the feelings that nature spirits gave, and the regrets that the dark spirits gave her."

"...I do not know how exactly she discerned so much information, per se, but her being able to discern something comes with knowing how spirits speak to you."

"But- back to the exercise itself, you must discern the aforementioned story through listening to each individual kind of spirit and find the patterns amongst the white noise that arrange themselves into a narrative."

"Does that make sense?"

Her brain was a bit frazzledgiven her earlier training session with Heidi... or, well, the ritual they did, so she wasn't sure if she was explaining things well.
(Lemuria Augustus)
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[22:00] First, one had to sit down. Lavinia made herself comfortable on a patch of grass, legs crossed and arms sagging over her calves. Her wings were retracted and black tail wrapped around her frame as it remained calm on the grassy floor.

The aroma of the grass meshing with the old, dusty air of the ruins made for a strangely bucolic experience. So different from the Tower of demons, where it mostly reeked of metal and death. It was therapeutic, almost.

"Mmm. I'm startin' to understand a bit better. How y'commune with 'em. I don't wanna /take/, but instead hear."

A peculiar prospect, given how Lavinia was essentially brought up to take from others and be taken from. Not that she was a sort of sociopath, but when it came to the occult, the approach was usually quite linear.

Black wings stretched out as her draconian eyes were slowly sealed. The goal was to enter a mindset that contradicted her instinct. One that would seekto reap what was precious to others. She wasn't here to rip off a piece of the spirits, but to merely hear and observe.

Strange, miasma-like clouds seemed to wheeze out of the girl's dark scales, and sought to coat the room with this odd gas. It wasn't harmful. No, it was a means for Lavinia to 'spread' herself throughout the stony room, and sniff out the spirits that resided.

"Not all spirits tell the same story, huh? I may see somethin' completely different the, yes?"
(Lavinia Walters)
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[22:06] "Spirits will often congregate together in order to share a story. They like arranging themselves into patterns, after all."

Or at least the autistic ones do.

"But it is true that you hear a different story than another person would. All of the stories they tell are true- although in the case of dark spirits, they are often only technically or metaphorically true- but they also tell stories based on the person listening. In a way, they tailor their stories to the ones they are most likely to get across to you."

"Once more, though, the exception to this is dark spirits, as they may try to trick you. However, in the presence of other spirits, they are vastly more likely to conform."
(Lemuria Augustus)
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[22:19] "Hmmm."

The story was subject to some changes then. More subtle than drastic. Interesting. A shame Lavinia hadn't fully listened Heidi, otherwise she could've cheated! But, the chance that the same visions would come to be would be very small.

Clearing her throat, Lavinia prepared for her first attempt. Voiding out distraction and allowing her little cloud of the dark to permeate the air, the drakanite was giving it a new attempt to commune with those from the realm beyond.

Visualizing was another difficult step, and the distractions were still an issue. Annoyed and somewhat desperate, she sought to wrap her wings around her being, essentially forming a dark-purple cone-like cocoon for her to hide behind as she'd first try to zone out the outside world.

It did take some time. A lot of time, actually. A mix of frustration and worry were shaking Lavinia's mindset beyond what was optimal for her to actually /listen/. But it wouldn't be a sound or even a vision that would get her to respond for the first time, but a smell.

The odour of Poppylus, actually. Far stronger than normal. Perhaps there was one growing nearby? And yet she could smell it as if she were holding it right before her face. A strange phenomenon, but an odd switch that'd get her to see something.

That something was amorphous to her, for she still hid behind her wings, and could only see brief shadows project themselves through her scales. And so, she'd allow the to retreat as she'd peer over at what she thought she had seen.

"It . . . Smells good. And yet, it feels so dreadful. I'm actually . . ."

Biting her lower lip, she'd just fixate a piece of stone not too far before her.

"Scared."
(Lavinia Walters)
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[22:28] Lemuria gazed upon the stone under Lavinia's feet for any oddities and, lo and behold, there was in fact something off about it. Normally, she'd allow her students to figure most of it out on their own, but Lavinia wasn't here for Lemuria's other lessons, so the woman figured she'd give her student a bit more of a helping hand than usual, if only to help quell her fear. She reached towards the stone Lavinia was looking at, and began scanning it.

"This piece of stone... You are gazing upon it for a reason; there is likely to be something about it that these spirits are trying to draw attention to."

Eventually, she came upon something that did, in fact, catch her attention. She turned the piece of stone towards Lavinia, drawing attention to a small red mark on the opposite side.

"See? Blood. Perhaps it is a part of the story, either used as a murder weapon, or maybe... maybe an escape from a worse fate."

"Think about it."
(Lemuria Augustus)
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[22:41] Green optics snapped out of their daze as they followed the teacher's guidance. Indeed, the was something about that stone, and the trace of blood made the peculiar smell get even stronger. It was no longer poppylus, an aroma Lavinia was quite fond of, but vanilla, something she loved even more! It felt as though the blood had that smell.

"I see. Yes, I see, teach. I- . . ."

Fixation returned, but this time, it seemed like she was undergoing a sort of absence. Mouth somewhat agape but posture straight. The smell was getting even strong, and with that, the story that was about to be told became clearer.

There was a plague. There were many dead. But not everyone had died. No, there'd always be survivors and naturally asymptomatics. This was when things had already been devastated. So little life left, only this overly alluring odour Lavinia couldn't rid herself of.

And that rock, what was that rock doing in this equation? Vertigo would seem to take over as she'd nearly tip forward only to have her body jerk itself back to a normal posture. Her 'eyes' were moving but her body stayed put. Her eyes didn't actually move but it seemed she was adopting another perspective. One the Spirits wanted her to see.

Her vision was blurred, however. Sight was oddly difficult. But the smells were strong, as well as some of the sounds. It was silent, but the dragging of palms and knees through the grass and stone were easily recognizable.

The smell was still overpowering, more and more as she got closer to /something/. It seemed she'd be crawling to the edge of the room, and with that her actual head would turn to the direction of that corner.

"It smells good, so good. I'm so hungry. I need this good smell."

She said, as if reciting something. Perhaps a specific mindset? A mix of her own vision and that of the projection? Her breathing suddenly started to accelerate as it seemed something had happened in what she was seeing. Something that'd make Lavinia panic. She remained seated, pinned as if she couldn't actually move, but swift breathing was bordering hyperventilation.
(Lavinia Walters)
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[22:52] Lemuria knew what was going on here, but calming Lavinia down took priority over anything else. After all, if she was panicking, what hope did she have to actually discern what message was being given?

"Control your breathing, Lavinia. Breathe in for four seconds, hold it for four seconds, breathe out for four seconds, hold it for four seconds, and repeat."

The fourfold breathing technique was a classic, although it wasn't exactly the kind of thing one would associate with a witch.

"Calm your thoughts the best you can. Then, observe them. Do not draw conclusions on your own thoughts until you can clearly see what those thoughts are."
(Lemuria Augustus)
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[23:05] She had to pause, even if she didn't have much of a choice to the little adventure she was having. Her teacher's voice was somewhat diluted by the strange focus she had on odours. Some of it was captured and she tried to apply the instructions given by the older woman.

Breathing remained uneven, but it wasn't anything too out of control. Now, Lavinia could more properly asses what she was shown by the spirits. It was a conclusion to a story, similar to what Heidi had seen. But a farewell letter was not the trinket she'd be blessed with to read out loud.

The rock made sense here, for it was suddenly in her hand. A reminder that the real Lavinia remained seated, barely moving beyond her breaths. Her hand was almost skeletal, as well as her wrist and arm. The skin didn't seem old though, this person was likely around Lemuria's age.

"She just smells so good."

Lavinia simply said before her body would begin to jump once, twice, three times. Each time, her ephemeral hand had utilized the stone to hit something. She knew what it was, but it was something she was trying to deny her brain to process.

"She was so perfect. And now . . . She's with me."

The plague had taken many, and even after surviving these horrors, the end didn't come so swiftly. It was uncertain if the person she saw through was one of the protagonists of Heidi's own vision. There was a male and a female. One the receiver returned? Did the writer recognize her by her scent and do the impossible?

"My stomach feels so full, Lady Lamuria. So full. So delicious. The smell, it was so good."

"But I feel so empty. I wanna die. I wanna leave this world. I wanna cease to exist. But I can't! I can't and I want her smell!"
(Lavinia Walters)
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[23:16] To say that Lemuria wasn't at least the slightest bit confused would be a complete lie, but this abject confusion was also punctuated by curiosity. The results of this looked more like a hex than anything...

She was only caught so off guard by the fact that she was somewhat tired, though. Were her presence of mind better, she'd be able to offer better guidance. But, perhaps, that lack of guidance would help more than it'd harm.

"Lavinia, is this you speaking, or spirits speaking through you? Are you absolutely certain that these thoughts and feelings are your own?"

Lemuria was relatively sure that she knew the answer to this, but a bit of questioning to draw awareness to it could only help the situation, really.
(Lemuria Augustus)
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[23:26] "Both."

Her gaze was no longer transfixed at that corner and could orient itself freely toward Lemuria.

"It was all in his head, these words. But I could feel all of it. His pain. His love. His desperation . . ."

It clearly wasn't a possession of some kind nor did she truly live the experience of this supposed man. And yet what she had seen was a particularly real perspective of something.

"That rock. He used it to put this thin woman to sleep. Forever. It was hard, because he loved her smell. But he was so hungry. So her smell, made the rest easier after killin' her."

To take from one, no matter how well-meaning or merciful it could be, was never a truly pleasant thing. It seems the spirits were indeed showing a story tailored to Lavinia's experiences. The tragic conclusion of a survivor, doing what had to be done to live, and it required the life of another to be taken.

"I could see clearly, after the first taste. The smell wasn't as strong. Wasn't as alluring."
(Lavinia Walters)
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[23:31] Lemuria Augustus says, "Well-"
[23:32] Lemuria Augustus says, "When you understand the story fully, what you need to do is to sublimate your knowledge into an understanding of spirits in a general sense."
[23:32] Lemuria Augustus says, "So it can be utilized."
[23:32] Lemuria Augustus says, "When that happens, it is likely that you will manifest the eyes."
[23:33] Lemuria Augustus says, "For once you understand it, your own spirit will respond in turn."
[23:33] Lavinia Walters asks, "Sublimate the knowledge in an understan'in of spirits in a general sense?"
[23:34] Lemuria Augustus says, "Yes. Find what is common among all spirits and how they communicate."
[23:45] The spirits clearly wanted to show Lavinia something. But, this overwhelming experience wasn't for nothing either.

"They gave me more than a story."

She peered down, tired eyes wide open as she'd fixate the flattened grass below her feet.

"They taught me a lesson. I tried to take from them, and now, they show me what it's brought this world to. To take. Always takin' everythin' y'can. Y'end up devourin' what y'love the most."

She spoke as though this had been obvious to her for a while and what she had seen merely allowed Lavinia to put it to words.

"I'm gonna eat everythin', or she'll eat me. It's a warnin'."

It seems there was more than one allegory here. One Lavinia wasn't keen on unveiling just like that.

"I can still smell the Poppylus . . ."
(Lavinia Walters)
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[23:49] Lemuria Augustus exclaims, "A good a lesson as any, I suppose!"
[23:50] * You have been awarded 1 Roleplay Points! *
[23:51] Lemuria Augustus says, "But-"
[23:51] Lemuria Augustus says, "I am exhausted."
[23:51] Lavinia Walters says, "Perhaps you need sleep, Teach."
[23:52] Lemuria Augustus exclaims, "Indeed I do!"
[23:52] Lemuria Augustus says, "My brain feels like jelly."
[23:52] Lavinia Walters says, "There is perfectly good grass, right here~"
[23:52] Lemuria Augustus says, "Yes, but-"
[23:52] Lemuria Augustus says, "I am a human."
[23:52] Lemuria Augustus says, "I am not a cow."
[23:53] Lemuria Augustus says, "I am also not hungry."
[23:53] Lavinia Walters exclaims, "But you can sleep on the grass!"
[23:53] Lavinia Walters says, "Lemuria."
[23:54] Lemuria Augustus asks, "Yes?"
[23:56] Lavinia Walters says, "Why am I not thriving at this like I should be? I'm supposed to, t'make Daemia happy."
[23:56] Lavinia Walters says, "Why am I not thriving at this like I should be? I'm supposed to, t'make Daemia happy"
[23:59] Lemuria Augustus says, "Maybe you just need to find that one method of doing this that resonates with you, deeply."
[00:00] Lavinia Walters says, "Wanted to try you way. Feelin' like I don't have all the figures to approach it right."