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- >”Sawah, who dis?”
- >There's a weird-ass looking fluffy pony in the front passenger seat of your cousin's car.
- >Why's it got wings and a horn?
- >”This is Tiffany. She's going to be your new mommy.”
- >Big smile from the fluffy freak.
- >”Hi Tiffn'y! Fwuffy name Auwa!”
- >”That's Aura...” Sarah translates.
- >”Dat wha' Auwa say!”
- >Sarah opens the door, and the fluffy hops down and waddles over to you.
- >Aura is a rich golden color, with a purple mane and tail and silvery eyes.
- >She hugs your black boot.
- >”Tiffn'y...no talkies?” she asks, looking up and batting her long eyelashes.
- “In a minute, kid. I need to talk to Sarah first.”
- >Aura lets go of your leg and waddles away a few feet. “Okay! Auwa wai' hewe!”
- >You look over at Sarah.
- “She's pretty obedient.”
- >Sarah shrugs, leaning against her Porsche.
- >”She's an alicorn. They're a lot smarter than the regular fluffy.
- >”Auwa am smawty! Am goo' fwuffy!”
- “What do I owe ya?”
- >”Six hundred even.”
- “Just take it out of my paycheck for the next few weeks.”
- >She nods, her eyes darting skyward as she calculates a payment plan.
- >A few seconds later, she motions for you to get in the car.
- >”Whewe Tiffn'y an' Sawah go?” Aura asks.
- >”We're just getting in the car. We're not leaving.”
- >”Okay! Auwa wai' fo' hoomans!”
- >Once you've gotten in and shut the door, Aura waves at you from outside.
- >She remains seated, however.
- “What d'ya want me to do, exactly?”
- >Sarah idly checks her fingernail polish. “I want you to find out what this thing is capable of.”
- >You tilt your head.
- “Is this a fluffy that can fight back?”
- >She laughs briefly and smirks. “Of course not. I mean emotionally. An alicorn is supposed to be a lot deeper than a regular fluffy.”
- >So your cousin wants you to experiment with this thing. Sweet.
- “Why ask me?”
- >She rolls her eyes and looks over at you.
- >”Because you're the only one willing to do this kind of thing.”
- >You can't help but smirk.
- “Hey, you and Luce are almost as messed up as me.”
- >Sarah folds her arms. “Our mother never hit us with a shovel.”
- “At least I got attention from mine. How long d'ya want this to take?”
- >”Lucy's just gotten a breeding pair, so you've got some time.”
- “Sure ya don't wanna have this one screw? She's a nice color.”
- >”She's also barren. Trust me, if I could get foals out of her, I would.”
- “Fine. What am I lookin' for, exactly?”
- >”Lucy's handling the pregnancy part, but I want to know how they act under...less than positive circumstances before her pair bears foals.”
- “You want me to fuck with her. 'Kay, I'm game.”
- >”Of course you are. I'll drop by tomorrow and see how our guinea pig is doing.”
- >You nod, getting back out as Sarah does. You both walk back over to Aura.
- >”Auwa goo' fwuffy!” she chirps.
- >”You certainly were. Well...you two have fun,” Sarah grins, before getting back in her car and leaving.
- >Aura follows you to the porch, her shimmering fluff waving in the hot breeze.
- >”Tiffn'y, Auwa hung'y, can haf nummies pwease?” she asks as you both walk into the house.
- >How polite.
- “Sure, I guess can we can eat before we get started.”
- >It's very quiet in the house this weekend.
- >Usually, you'd have a few fluffy ponies, a pool of the condemned waiting to die for the sins of the fluffies at the shop.
- >Aura waddles around, examining her surroundings curiously.
- >”Fwoow sof'! Auwa hoofies feew goo'!” she chirps happily. “Whewe nummies, pwease?”
- “Wait right here.”
- >You wander into the kitchen, open the fridge, and get the first thing that you see.
- >Pimento cheese.
- “Hey, Aura, come in here.”
- >”Auwa do wha' say!” she confirms, waddling into the kitchen with a big smile.
- >You scoop out a little of the cheese onto a plate and set it down.
- “Try that.”
- >Aura sniffs at it before taking a small bite.
- >”No wike dis...Tiffn'y pwease gif new nummies?”
- >She's sitting on her haunches, looking up at you. Even in the kitchen light, her fluff is shiny.
- >You say nothing, instead folding your arms and glaring.
- >Surprisingly, Aura cowers and frowns. “No mean wook, pwease, Auwa jus' wan' new nummies...”
- >Interesting. Your regular fluffies would just keep asking for new food.
- >You'll be nice for now.
- “All right. Since ya asked nicely, I'll let ya try something else.”
- >There's a box of leftover pizza from last night. Since you were going to eat it for lunch anyway, you heat it all up in the oven.
- >Aura gets a small slice with the pepperoni removed; that meat would make her shit smell even worse than usual.
- >Again, she sniffs at it and takes a bite.
- >”Wike dis nummie! Fank yoo, Tiffn'y!”
- >She chows down, asking for another piece when she's done.
- >You deny her. She frowns and waddles over to where you're sitting, pawing on your boot.
- >”Pwease? Stiww hung'y...”
- >Suddenly, her stomach gurgles. “Uh oh! Poopie feww! Whewe make goo' poopies?”
- >You smirk and remain silent.
- >”Pwease teww! No wan' make bad poppies!”
- >She hops around on her hooves in a circle, her face panicked. She even holds her tail down over her rear end.
- >After a few more seconds, she can hold it no more and drops a pile on your kitchen floor.
- >”Nuuuu! No mean make poopies hewe! Auwa vewy sowwy, no mean be bad! No mean make bad poopies!”
- >You watch her as she tries to nose the logs away, crying. “Make betta! Auwa make poopies go 'way! Vewy sowwy!”
- >She's awfully penitent – and coherent – for a fluffy pony.
- >”No can make betta!” she whines, after a few moments of pushing the shit. “No smeww pwetty!”
- >She looks back up at you, her golden snout smeared with brown. “Am vewy sowwy!”
- >It looks like she honestly means it, too.
- >Too bad. You stand up and look down at her.
- “This isn't where you're supposed to shit.”
- >”Auwa sowwy! No say whewe go! Poopies no stay in!”
- >You slam your fist into your open palm.
- >Aura drops to her stomach and trembles, but she doesn't try to 'hide'.
- >”No say whewe go, Auwa no bad fwuffy, Auwa twy be goo'...”
- >Usually, you'd just get a stream of 'fwuffy sowwy'.
- “Tried to be good...but didn't.”
- >”Am sowwy! Am sowwy!” she cries. A yellow puddle appears under her back half.
- >”Nuuuuuu! Peepeee no hewe! Why peepee?! Sowwy! Auwa sowwy!”
- “You ain't bein' a very good fluffy, Aura.”
- >”Auwa am goo' fwuffy! Auwa no mean dis!” she replies, standing up again.
- >You pound your fist again.
- >”Nuuuu!” she cries, waddling around in a terrified circle, dripping piss as she goes.
- “Now you're makin' a bigger mess!”
- >”Sowwy! Auwa no mean make bad peepee!”
- >She stops running around and stares dumbly at the puddle, then the trail of drops she left.
- >”How make betta?! Auwa wan' make bad poopies and peepee go 'way!” she suddenly blurts out.
- >She stares at them again for a brief time before wailing.
- >”Auwa no can make betta...pwease no owwies...sowwy, sowwy,” she sniffles, dropping to her stomach again and staring up, pleading with her eyes.
- >Alicorns sure seem to have a deeper grasp of consequences.
- >You've not laid a hand on her and she's already terrified.
- >Your regular fluffies, after not being punished immediately, would just think everything was fine and go play.
- >Aura, however, is waiting for resolution.
- >You point to the living room.
- “Go back in there and wait for me.”
- >She nods furiously and shuffles, in reverse, toward the doorway, only looking back periodically.
- >”Auwa go, Auwa wai', be goo' fwuffy, be goo', no mo' do bad tingy...”
- >Her eyes shine with fear you've not seen before in a fluffy pony.
- >This is going to be a fun weekend.
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