On “The baddest baddie in La La Land”

Nina Sokolovic is a 27-year-old Uber driver. On March 1, 2022, Nina Sokolovic murders a Yale-educated Rhodes Scholar named Connor Fisk and then disappears. (This is a parody of America’s obsession with true crime.)

Here are the headlines that tumble out as a result:

March 2, 2022: “Killing of Rhodes Scholar Not a ‘Random Act,’ Police Say”
March 3, 2022: “Motive in Rhodes Scholar Slaying May Never Be Known”
March 4, 2022: “Nina Sokolovic, 27-Year-Old Uber Driver, Named Primary Suspect in Fisk Slaying”
March 5, 2022: “Suspect in Fisk Slaying Left Behind Purse, Phone, and Note: ‘I Did It For the Universe’”
March 9, 2022: “Sokolovic Troubled for Many Years By Mother’s Notoriety”
March 16, 2022: “Sokolovic Hid an Affair With Mother’s Ex-Boyfriend, Says Former Admissions Officer”
March 21, 2022: “‘You Don’t Know Who I Am’: A Timeline of Nina Sokolovic’s Path From the Regency Arms to Enid, Oklahoma”
March 23, 2022: “F.B.I. Can’t Confirm Nina Sokolovic Wrote Viral Instagram Post”
March 25, 2022: “Officials from Idaho to Virginia Raise Concern About #TeamNina, More Viral Copycat Attacks Feared”
March 29, 2022: “Colleges Take Aggressive Action Against #TeamNina, Some Republicans Raise Concerns”
April 14, 2022: “Hollywood Is Watching the Sokolovic Saga, But from a Wary Distance”

On March 21, 2022, Nina starts posting memes to Instagram. (The first meme: “Sometimes I think I’m the only woman in America who still takes eating the rich seriously.”) An E! Online poll gives birth to an ironic hashtag, #TeamNina, which Nina skillfully uses to lead what The New York Times eventually calls “a campaign of viral anti-capitalist domestic terrorism.”

Nina Sokolovic has a Hegelian interpretation of good and evil. Good is “Humility” and Evil is “Power.” God is Good and Satan is Evil. White Haze is Woman and Red Haze is Man.

(“God isn’t dead. Nina resurrects Her.”)

Nina uses her disappearance and platform in front of the American public to tell America a story: Ever since the Enlightenment, America has been “cradled by the Church of Satan.” (Satan is a metonym for Power.) “Purchasing power. Reputational power. Social power. (Look: there’s a power for every letter of the alphabet.) Telepathic power.” —Nina

The stick of dynamite is this:

(1) Americans still pretend to fear Satan. (Rosemary’s Baby, The Exorcist)
(2) Americans love capitalism.

Why not let the two ideas converge?

The stick of dynamite is also: a realistic look at what a left-wing revolution might look in America in the 21st century. (NPR’s Fresh Air is parodied at length.)

The final stick of dynamite: Revolution will come eventually, just like Marx said it would (every generation plays Musical Chairs), and in the 21st century, the stakes have never been higher: we have all the technology for left-wing political violence to tumble us straight into 1984.

“If you see me, don’t run, it’s too late: 1984 is already here.
1984 runs through all our True intensions like one chaotic little girl.
Some call her Nina.
Some call her Justice.
But you—you can call me Revolution.”

I feel like American democracy’s cultural/emotional/psychosocial “temperament” has produced a lot of oopses lately ever since the internet reshuffled information channels. The instability is vibrating us.

Nina would be a big oops.