Alleged different versions of Johnny (with commentary)

Source: https://deppdive.net/exhibits/Plt371A%201.01%20to%202.29-CL20192911-051622.M4A

AH: I see somebody who is changing, always, into different versions of a person that I recognize for a brief moment, and then he slips away and he disappears. And then I get a different version of him. I get the insecure scared version of him that lashes out in a different medium every time. So if it’s Adderall j*nkie Johnny, then he’s abusive and he’s a bully and he’s a tyrant and he’s mean and he’s reactionary and he’s incendiary, and anything I do and say is calls for violence or anger. If I speak to him honestly and bluntly from the heart, I’m yelling at him. If I argue back with him, then I’m abusive. If I don’t say anything, then I am dismissive or absent or “what’s wrong” or somewhere else. If I engage with him, I’m part of the problem, I’m yelling, I’m mean. If I don’t engage with him, then I’m part of the problem. No matter what I do, I’m f**ked. Because if I look at him the wrong way, he’s the problem. If I say the wrong thing, God knows what it is, I’m the problem. I’m the problem, really?

[COMMENTARY: Notice that JD doesn't get a chance to respond before the clip cuts off. AH was merely describing her claims or perceptions about JD shifting personalities. Although drugs of course would alter his mood in some ways, this audio doesn't prove that drugs turned him into a monster. It's more likely that he turned to drugs whenever he was trying to escape AH's abuse, and AH incorrectly blamed his escaping on the drugs rather than the other way around.]

AH: That's the guy who’s on a bunch of f**king speed.

[COMMENTARY: I think it's also worth noting what she *didn't* say here. She doesn't say "Johnny, when you're on speed you bash my head against the wall and I'm terrified you could kill me." Instead she seemed to be accusing him of primarily psychological abuse.]



Full list of transcripts: https://pastebin.com/3zdSHmet