i'm leaving

so i'm officially leaving PSR after the marathon in august, but i'm basically leaving now.  i have zero interest in speedrunning pokemon anymore. i'll stay around because i'm obligated to do my race in the marathon, but i probably won't be that into it and likely won't practice much for it.  there was a reason i said i probably wouldn't submit anything for the marathon and this is exactly why.  the submission period was way too far in advance and i just can't keep interest in anything for long periods of time.

there are two major reasons for me leaving.  the first one is that speedrunning isn't fun for me anymore, and i don't enjoy pokemon, or streaming in general.  the second reason, one that i've not actually gone public with until now, is exarion's attitude, and the attitude of some other people who aren't worth mentioning because they aren't important.  every time i see exarion do anything anywhere, it honestly just sickens me and takes away any interest i had in possibly continuing.

he has done nothing wrong, the only reason i said his name is because i want to give people an actual reason that isn't super vague.  i respect him as a speedrunner still but i can't stand anything he does or how he does it.  add in the fact that he's literally everywhere in the community right now, and because i choose to avoid him as much as possible, i have to stay away from places where i would like to be more involved.  for that reason, i will be leaving the community instead of staying around a member who just doesn't run any games anymore.

i feel like i've accomplished enough in pokemon speedrunning.  i didn't meet any of my goal times, but an important piece of advice is that what time you have in an RNG-heavy game doesn't really matter.  for example, my goal time in crystal was a 3:18, and i know from some runs that didn't finish that i was skilled enough to get that time.  grinding for 3:18 just wasn't worth it.  the same goes for yellow.  while my time is easily improvable with any finished run, it's just not worth it to grind for the necessary RNG.  it's obvious from watching my runs that i am one of the top 3 yellow runners ever in terms of execution, and i have a top 3 time.  i don't need to get a 1:54 or 1:55 to make me feel like i was any better at running the game.

it was a good run for a long time, but i have no regrets on leaving and i won't be coming back to the community, even if i decide to do more runs again in the future.