"I fucking did it ok I shot all of them, they deserved it the libtard pussies, there good for nothing with there 'safe spaces' I did what was better for Australia" I pounded My chest and stood up proudly. "what do you mean better for Australia you went on a fucking killing spree, have you lost your mind" I ignored him, he didn't understand. he wasn't like me he had moved on, I couldn't do that. "so what are you gonna do?", "ill hide just out of town and come back in a few weeks, it will blow over like nothing happened". I saw the look on his face, I could tell he wanted to hug me and kill me at the same time, I crossed my fingers and hugged him hoping it wasn't the latter. "so when are you leaving" Chris pulled his arms around me and squeezed tears coming out his eyes. A tear fell from my eye, I managed to mutter out "midnight" I knew if I left then they wouldn't have a good perimeter set out and I could escape unnoticed " I'm sorry" Chris muttered now crying just as much as me. "for what idiot, it was me that killed them you shouldn't be sorry for anything" I quickly snarked back. "no...  I said I would look after you and that I'd make sure your on the right path when mum die-" "DON'T" I was getting aggravated now. "I should have got you help it affected you too much"
"it just opened my eyes to right and wrong and those libtards are fucking wrong... they fucking killed her"
"it was the left you idiot it was some extremist" I didn't want to believe him not now not after what it just did, I stood up hugged him and went to leave, Just as I stepped out of our shitty apartment I heard Chris "you will come back right" I went to leave "right lew" he sobbed I hated that nickname but I nodded, I ran out the door as I broke into full-on tears again. I went down to the gas station to grab some rolling papers there was no way I was dealing with this sober. I rang ash to get some dope "hey its ash" he sounded worried. "yeah I need some dope man can we meet at Petersham Park" it was a kids park, one I visited a lot as a kid but not so much since mum died. "yeah is 10:45 fine?"
"yeah, ill be there"
"oi did you hear about the shooting"
"yeah" I wanted the conversation to end "cya then"
10:45 soon rolled around and I met him at the park and bought a 50 it was gonna get me through this "oi before you go wanna try one of these it's on the house" ash held up a small red tablet with what looked like the MasterChef logo on it,
"what is it" I queried
"you gotta try it man its the best"
fuck it I thought, I either get arrested or die in the end.
"yeah give it here" I hastily threw it in my mouth and started walking to the old river. when I arrived it was eerie it was always peaceful there but tonight it felt cold and depressed, I lay there and just looked at the stars they started to spin when I awoke on the river bank where I layed down, to begin with. "what happened" I quivered audibly, thats when I remembered the fucking pill ash sold me the cheap dog probably laced it, 'thats it hes dea-' as I went to finish my sentance I remmeberd the events of yesterday and what I did and why I baught the pill. it was sunny "damn," I thought as I remembered I was supposed to leave at midnight I wandered to a gas station behind the desk was an astonishingly fat, disgustingly ugly and extremely old man. "what do you want" he snarked "ugh.. what time is it?" sounding obviously on a come down
"oh about 6:37am, got somewhere you need to be on a Wednesday?"
"Wednesday? its Saturday" I shouted, shocked.
"I'll think you'll find its Wednesday, look here it's on the paper"
shit... he was right how am I gonna get out unnoticed now the perimeter is gonna be crawling with cops.
I saw a car down the street and decided that I was just gonna have to be confident, I still have my fake id for when I go out 'stupid Australia with there stupid being 18 to drink I've been drinking since I was 12 so what like 4 years and I'm fine' to be fair in this case it might have saved me I ran over to the car and smashed the window, luckily dad taught me a few tricks before he left and hot wiring a car was one I got it running in 3 minutes tops and pulled onto the road that leaves town. I hit the checkpoint at roughly midday. "ID please" I could tell he was tired
I handed him my fake,
"yeah that's fine can I just check the boot of your car?"
"Yeah mate, go ahead" i opened my boot and he made sure there was no fake walls or anything inside it I just stayed calm and casual and when he gave me the thumbs up to leave I was a go, I suddenly remembered the dope I bought from ash and decided to roll up a doobie and smoke it, I was free. I decided to drive to port McQuarrie it was quite a posh area and I don't think they would come looking there. I arrived just before dawn and decide to pitch a tent in a little bit of bush I awoke to a bright light in my eyes "COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP, YOU'RE SURROUNDED WE HAVE RIFLES ON THE TENT" I lifted my hands up astonished I blurted out "YOU GOT ME MY HANDS ARE UP DON'T SHOOT" they cuffed me and took me into custody and booked me, "how the fuck did they know it was me?' "I want a lawyer" I protested. I sat there in that holding cell sulking I didn't eat or sleep I just sat there. My court date came around and that's, then it all added up Chris, was sat at the fucking podium, head in hands. did lewis Thomas commit the serial murder of the 7 people at the invasion day rally 26th of January 2018? chris muttered out "yes your honour" How could he do this to me? "you are hereby sentenced to life imprisonment" the judge shouted but he was silent to me I just heard my brother's words "yes" I couldn't get it out of my head all I heard was "YES YES YES " it was driving me crazy all I remember is getting thrown into that cell and realising I'm never seeing the outside world again all the things I can never do. legally drink, have kids get married I was fucking crushed.
it wasn't until a few weeks later that I realized that my brother gave me till the Monday to get the hell out before he reported me he thought I would be long gone. Then when I hit the checkpoint on the Wednesday the cop took down my license plate and recorded which way I was going they tracked me down in a few hours.

what is my life now what can I do sit in a cell all my life... FUCK that. I don't blame you. you had too.
I love you I always will. I forgive you for snitching on me it was the right thing to do I can't believe what I've done I took all those peoples lives away from all 7. I was sat on a rooftop with my stolen rifle, and I killed that little girl and her mum and those 5 other people why couldn't I just forgive the people that killed mum. I was blinded by rage.
I cant live with the guilt... I'm sorry