I tried to keep it cool for a while, but I failed. Edited for typos (and removed her blasphemous—or, in her parlance, 'dirtt'—name) because I actually took the time to type it all out.



Me: You cut the group, I cut you lol



SWMNBM: Lolokay. Not like youre ever on anyway



Me: Yeah, I got a life. Oops



SWMNBM: First, i didnt say that was a bad th...ing. Second, i didnt cut the group. They cut me. And kicked me from the call and convo. Third, theyre all ugly and stalkers anyway.



Me: Oicicic. Why so defensive? :< Internet is srs bsns



SWMNBM: Im not defensive. Ive been leaving that convo for weeks. They just kept adding me back. Its nbd to me... But cleary its a big deal to them if they went as far as to tell someone not even in the convo. But w/e. Haters gonna hate.



Me: ;-; internet so mean



SWMNBM: Not mean. I just want nothing to do with them. Plus, i like associating with pretty people. Not lacy and calyssa and mango



Me: Oh, good point. I like associating with pretty people, too. I won't be texting you anymore, sorry lol



SWMNBM: Youll fit right in with them <3. I kinda feel bad for you guys... Being not cute and playing games about cheese



Me: All lies. Since when am I not cute, and since when do I play mice game?



SWMNBM: Umm since you grew facial hair. Not cute



Me: Lol, it's mostly gone for now. But you need to get over the fact that men have facial hair. Only kids and cancer patients don't. I take it you have a chemo fetish?



SWMNBM: No. If a guy doesnt want a girl with facial hair, we dont want it either.its dirty



Me: Lol that's like saying it a guy doesn't want a girl with a penis, you don't want a guy with one. Are penises dirty? What you want in a guy is actually a girl.



SWMNBM: Uncut penises are dirtt, yea. And body hair isnt sexy, man or woman



Me: Lol, you go live in your fantasy world where everyone looks identical. I'll be having sex with someone that actually finds human beings attractive



SWMNBM: The girl you have sex with will not shave. I do not expect everyone to look the same. I value so many different styles. I even find gangsters and scene kids attractive if they do it the right way. The guy im seeing now even has a chinstrap... But hes one of the few people it works on



Me: Oh god, chinstrap? Those haven't looked good on anyone since 1885. What do I care if people I sleep with shave? How fucking shallow are you? I don't find either shaven or unshaven more attractive than the other. Gangsters? Scene kids? So they dress differently, but they're still stuck in a high school clique mentality, desperate for attention and completely ignoring the capabilities of their brains. Their one-dimensional attempts at nonconformism result in a pitiful level of homogeneity. I'm glad they have like-minded, non-thinking people like you to fuck. At least our little online community is based on real friendship, not the superficial, stuck-in-their-time standards of 'quality' that you cherish. Enjoy your life.