- At the EVO 2019 afterparty, I was in the VIP area upstairs with drink tickets. As I had either used most of mine or given them out to friends, I had none left. When my homegirl showed up to the party a bit late, I was sad to inform her that I no longer had tickets. I regret the what I said next because I should have known better, but I want to express the event as I remember it. I jokingly said “you see that guy over there”, pointing to Miguel, “he’ll definitely buy you a drink”. I expected them to meet, hopefully get along, and if he bought her a drink, cool. No harm done. I stood nearby and kept an eye on them.
- At a certain point I see quite a few drinks being drunk, so I realize I need to slow her down because I wasn’t sure if she could handle that much alcohol. As a side note, I think giving this much alcohol this quickly to a girl is a predatory practice on its own. It doesn’t matter if someone says they are down to keep drinking. If you’re the one buying, use your brain to figure out if she can handle it, or even better, just know what a normal human amount looks like in that short period of time. Anyway...
- Around this point in time, I’m hanging with a good friend who wishes to remain anonymous. We approach her to make sure everything is cool, and she tells my friend and I “no matter what happens, do not let me go home with Miguel tonight”. I agreed, and then said “I’ll literally talk to him right now so he gets it too while he’s sober”
- So I walk up to him and say something along the lines of “Hey man, you haven’t done anything wrong so don’t worry, but right now, while she’s coherent, she’s telling me that she doesn’t want to go home with you tonight. So I’m letting you know that no matter what happens, even if SHE starts flirting with you while she’s drunk, nothing is going down tonight.”
- He immediately puts up an “OK” sign with his hand and says “no worries, I got it. I got it.” I say “cool”, and continue on with my night.
- As the night progresses, the alcohol starts hitting the both of them. Keep in mind, she is probably 4’11”, so I wasn’t surprised to find that the alcohol she drank was hitting her way harder than she had prepared for. While Miguel was also drunk, he was way more aware of what was going on than she was.
- My friend and I remained vigilant. At a certain point, she’s really gone and starts being flirty, like with arm touching and body language, but nothing overt. It was distinctly different from how she was acting when she was sober. I know how people can get when they drink way too much, so I knew it was possible that she could find him uninteresting while sober, but start flirting while blackout drunk. Meanwhile, Miguel becomes aggressively flirty and sloppy throughout the night in response. Multiple times throughout the night we had to get involved and get in between him and her, reminding him often about what I told him when he was sober. He would respond every time as if he got it, or at times as a victim as if he wasn’t doing anything wrong. My friend and I definitely saw him up close, flirty, and physical with her. Once again, he was hearing everything we were saying and was aware of the environment while drinking. I promise you he remembers what was happening. I have confirmation of it, but that’s not something I have the right to share here.
- While the physical actions I WITNESSED were not necessarily inappropriate on their own, what was inappropriate was that she literally expressed her wishes while sober, he claimed to understand, then proceeded to be physical and in her space, all while it was EXCEEDINGLY clear how absolutely wasted she was.
- Fast forward to the end of the night, my friend and I are absolutely tired of his behavior and annoyed at him forcing us to intervene throughout the night because he wouldn’t control himself around a very drunk girl. As we walk out of the party venue, I attempt to get her address to get her home. Meanwhile, Miguel continues to act as if he’s victimized for the way we were treating the situation.
- Just to get an indication of how gone she was, when I tried getting her address, she starts by giving me the street number “86444444444444444” all while being completely unable to pay attention to me or look me in the eye for more than 3 seconds at a time. Her inebriation isn’t the issue though, I’m only expressing this because Miguel could also plainly see her state too, and yet continued to be physical with her throughout the night.
- We finally got an address out of her, but my friend and I realized that we couldn’t let her go home alone in an uber because we couldn’t leave her alone with a random driver, and because we couldn’t verify that her address was accurate unless we went with her. It’s at this moment when Miguel began exchanging numbers with her, or trying to, and I was furious. He could damn well see that she was in no position to consent to exchanging numbers. Side bar, I fucking hate it when men do this because just like they need consent for anything physical, they need consent for other things, including getting a number. I also feared that he would maintain contact with her once my friend and I were gone in order to reconnect with her during the night. He was consistently acting like my friend and I were “blocking” him from succeeding throughout the night by making him out to be a bad guy. It pissed me off like you have no idea.
- My friend and I paid a $50 uber to her place, verified it was her home, and paid a $50 uber ride back.
- After the event, he proceeded to contact her for many months after in ways that made her uncomfortable, but she can speak to that better than I can. I witnessed many of the texts and I hated how he consistently painted himself as a good guy and a victim of people simply hating him for no reason. She also revealed to me later that he had touched her inappropriately around her crotch area that night while she was still coherent enough to remember, and I 100% believe her.
- What makes me so upset about this night is that she was LUCKY that she had us watching her that night. What if we weren’t there? This man could see her state throughout the night and refused to maintain distance and stop his aggressive actions. What would have stopped him without two men watching over her?
- And while I won’t get into this because it involves another victim, he exhibited this same exact behavior 2 weeks later at SmashCon. So this exact thing was a pattern. He cannot understand consent and cannot control himself while intoxicated, and it took me and my friend being there on TWO separate occasions to stop him from physically pursuing two different women that were visibly blackout intoxicated. On both occasions, the women contacted me the next day bed-ridden about how they don’t remember much and had to stay in their room to recover the whole day. These are the women he was aggressively pursuing both times. If you don’t think this sounds that terrible, please consider that this is only because we were there to watch these women and stop his advances. What happened on those two nights was the better scenario.
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