Cold opening

"What... what are you guys waiting for? Some kind of light show, gigantic monster, or a chiming sound?"
"Something like that." Blake answered, "It's been kind of tradition for every major change to be accompanied by-" In the far off distance, a noise silenced Blake.
Morgan became excited.
Barney face palmed.
Antimo and Tefadron raised opposite eyebrows.
Somewhere, off in the distance, the wailing of a thousand year old electric guitar sounded, a piercing, screaming sound, cut rough, ripped from the faces of only the steepest of cliffs.
Torn from the souls of only the most demented demons.
Summoned from the blackest pits of Antimatter, and forced into being by an unwilling universe.
A stage appeared, fog flowing over it, lasers blasting outwards, pyrotechnics going off the size of geysers, and slowly a hatch opened. A beam of light rained down heavenly, beautiful, cursed. And a solitary man rose from the depths of the many Dimensional locks that had kept him so very far away from his true calling. "Hello America, you sexy bitch. I'm Stephen Colbert, the new Core of Existence. Are you ready to FUCK!?"