Cory/Mila: Mancrabs

-- manufacturedInformation [MI] began pestering keenPropriety [KP] at [REDACTED] --
MI: 7he snark has 1ef7 7he coop
KP: Cory, dear, you know it's me.
KP: I really see no need for this little password system =|
MI: who's 7h1s cory fe11a?
MI: never heard of h1m
KP: You really should stop fooling around! I am speaking to you, Mister Cory, aren't I?
MI: 1'm no7 go1ng 7o deny or conf1rm 7ha7 1ove
MI: 1 mean, 1s 17 so hard 7o g1ve back a s1mp1e password?
KP: I find it all quite ridiculous!
KP: You should have some trust in us, sweetie.
MI: of course 1 wou1d 7rus7 you
MI: 1f 1 knew you were you!
KP: Sigh.
KP: Forget it, it's a boojum.
MI: cheers!
MI: so, a1r1gh7? hows 17 hang1ng?
KP: Ohohoho! Just the usual chaos, as you know.
KP: Cleaning after poor Mother, sewing clothes for dear Drew. You know how it is!
MI: we11 on accou7 of no7 hav1ng 7o guard my guard1an un11ke some peop1e around, no7 par71cu1ar1y
KP: It was merely a figure of speech, dearie!
KP: I suppose you are still hiding out? How has that been for you, sweetie?
MI: oh, 7hey s7111 haven7 found my 1a1r undernea7h a red ma11box ou7s1de 7he houses of par11men7
KP: Ohoho! An underground base, then? How romantic! Just like James Bond!
MI: exac71y 11ke 7ha7
MI: on accou7 of 17 be1ng a work of f1c71on
KP: Cory McGuire: Teenage Spy! It certainly has a ring to it.
MI: now come now, 1 ac7ua11y am on a goddamn ac7ua1 no-f1y 11s7
MI: 7hey can7 hand1e me
KP: Ohohoho my!
KP: Dare I ask what you did to land on that no-fly list?
MI: c1ass1f1es of course
MI: 1e7s jus7 say 17 1nvo1ves japan
MI: *c1ass1f1ed
KP: Japan, hmm?
KP: Would it happen to involve any... conventions of sorts?
MI: no7 b1oody 11ke1y
MI: keep 7h1s on 7he 1ow down, bu7 7h1nk c1oser 7o ac7ua1 fuck1ng proof of ac7ua1 fuck1ng a11ens
KP: Really, now~?
MI: we11 1 can7 ac7ua11y show you you know?
KP: Oh no, I completely understand, dear!
MI: 1m g1ad you 7h1nk so 1ove
KP: A spy must keep his secrets, no~? Ohoho!
MI: bu7 of course dar11ng
MI: ba1anced on1y w17h 7he du7y 7o ge7 7he 7ru7h ou7 7here 7o 7he s1eep1ng sheep1e
KP: The truth about the oh-so-sinister companies and their brainwashing agenda?
MI: bra1nwash1ng? who sa1d any7h1ng abou7 bra1nwash1ng?
MI: ser1ous1y, 1f you know 7he answer p1ease 7e11 me
KP: Cory, dear, relax! I was merely joshing you.
MI: r1gh7, hav1ng a 1augh are you?
MI: 7ha7's perfec71y f1ne
MI: 1f youve go7 any o7her grea7 crackers abou7 b1gfee7 and f1y1ng 7eacups 1e7s hear 7hem
KP: Sweetie, you are taking all this hooplah quite too seriously.
MI: maybe 7ha7s jus7 wha7 1 wan7 you 7o 7h1nk?
KP: Perhaps! But knowing you, you tend to believe in quite perculiar oddities!
MI: oh, qu17e
MI: 7he rea1 ques71on 1s wh1ch par71cu1ar absurd 7heor1es 1 be11eve 1n
KP: Ohohoho! So you do draw a line at mancrabs and extraterrestrials?
MI: everyone knows we are be1ng v1s17ed by E7s, 7he on1y ques71on 1s wha7 form 7hey 7ake
MI: ac7ua11y 7hey cou1d be descr1bed as wh17e mancrabs
KP: Ohohoho!
KP: Dear Cory, you are slaying me.
MI: 1m no7 k1dd1ng, hard crus7ean 11ke carapace w17h b1g round heads
KP: Cory, really, I brought up the mancrabs as a silly joke. There's no need to build upon it!
MI: 1m we11 aware
MI: 1m jus7 say1ng you happen 7o exac71y r1gh7
MI: are you sure your no7 jus7 repress1ng any memor1es of 7h1rd k1nd encoun7er?
KP: ... no, I am fairly certain, dearie.
KP: Though there was one incident where I remember some oddly bright lights!
MI: go on, en11gh7en me
KP: Oh... I don't know. When I think about it it's all just so fuzzy =(
MI: okay okay, 1 ge7 7ha7 17 m1gh7 be a wee b17 hard bu7 7ake your swee7 71me
KP: I think... oh... there were probably mancrabs. Yes, I recall them now! Mancrabs, everywhere. Scuttling about!
MI: how 7err1b1e for you
MI: wou1d you 11ke 7o 7a1k abou7 7he emo71ona1 scars 17 1ef7 you
MI: (warn1ng 1m no7 a proffes1ona1 and ma1ns7ream psycho1ogy ex1s7s on1y 7o push drugs anyway)
KP: I think they are the reason why I can't stand shellfish anymore.
MI: 7ha7 mus7 be we11 7err1b1e for you
KP: Sigh! It is a tremendous tragedy! =(
MI: 7rue
MI: 1 don7 know wha7 1d do w17hou7 any shr1mp
MI: jus7 7o be c1ear, 7h1s you 7ry1ng 7o pu11 me 1eg aga1n r1gh7?
KP: ... perhaps.
MI: we11 bugger 7ha7, 1 wou1d cou1d have done w17h some f1rs7 hand accoun7s
KP: Ohoho! I'm sorry, dear, but you are much too easy to tease.
MI: we11 of course
MI: 17s no co1nc1dence 7ha7 peop1e who be1e1ve 1n consp1racy 7heor1es are por7rayed as we1rdos and 1nsane 1n 7he med1a
KP: It's probably because most conspiracists do happen to be weird and insane, dear.
MI: no, 17s so 1f anyone ever d1d f1nd ou7 7he 7ru7h nobody wou1d be1e1ve 7hem
MI: a1so, 1m no7 7ha7 we1rd
KP: Of course not, sweetheart.
MI: 7h1nk abou7 17 7h1s way:
MI: do you be1e1ve me?
KP: Well, no!
MI: 7hen 17s obv1ous1y work1ng!
KP: Cory, sweet, I would believe you if you had something more substantial than theories about shadowy corporations to throw at me
KP: !
MI: someday
MI: perhaps soon
KP: That seems to be your usual response, dear.
MI: jus7 keep wa171ng 1ove
KP: Ohohoho! And how long I will wait!
MI: when 7he go1den c17y marches 7o war / w17h 7he rea1m of 7he queen of purp1e
MI: 7ha7s nos7radamus by 7he way
KP: Quoting superstitious prophets won't exactly help me believe, dear!
KP: But I'll trust you to bring the evidence, oho! If there is any to be had, that is.
MI: we11 1m g1ad you a7 1eas7 keep an open m1nd
MI: r1gh7 1 need 7o cu7 7h1s shor7, usua1 reasons
MI: nex7 password se7
MI: Q: 7he mancrabs are back A: on 7he menu
KP: Sniff!
KP: I see what you did there, Mister Cory. I approve of it.
KP: >=)
MI: 1m g1ad you approve
MI: see you around
KP: Ta-ta!
-- manufacturedInformation [MI] ceased pestering keenPropriety [KP] at [REDACTED] --