It is one thing to be open-minded.  If I weren't, I would condemn you for doing what I personally feel is unnatural.

However, it is another to silence criticism.  Xif, although the best I can do is imagine the pain you have experienced, the way you have responded to criticism in the early months of your change created an impregnable wall, an unspeakable topic on IRC for which we all had to pay you deference.  (I have no doubt given your mental state then, such deference may have been necessary.)  However, this legacy still remains.  Just as you were put in a position of overall distrust by your family, in FFH's extended "family", I didn't feel like I could publicly reveal my concerns without being shot down as an insensitive bigot or an incorrigible paternalist who had neither the right (nor experience) to lecture someone else on their life.

I've read the posts by the old Zodiac in Spam and I recall him vividly on IRC.  In Spam, he was every bit as bad as Archael: he harassed many newcomers so often, and for so little reason, that it became part of his mythos.  His public hypocrisy about the nature of his emotions was also quite disturbing: I recall him very impatiently telling me that he was perfectly patient and never emotional when I was making a really dumb ASM error.  I commend you, Xifanie, for having the compassion to see that was wrong and having the courage to do something about it.
However, I feel in the process of finding yourself, you've swung too much in the opposite direction.  If Zodiac's insistence on "emotionless" logic (and the anti-social, elitist, and selfish hypocrisy needed to maintain it) was wrong, is what you have alternatively embraced (the primacy of emotion and happiness, and the resultant anxieties and breakdowns) so much better?  Yes, you are undoubtedly happier (and for someone who never had much positive emotion before, it's like a beggar discovering a gold mine), but is your happiness the only thing that matters?  Maybe this is just me (who grew up with parents who emphasized duty before personal satisfaction), but I think your refusal to consider anything "logical" because of its association with what you once hated is an unhealed wound.  Your mind is may have been rewired by estrogen so you are less inclined to focus for 8 hours straight, but you are still the same person who built this site, built so many of our collective tools, taught me and so many others the basics of MIPS assembly, and led us through so much toil.  I have no doubt you still have these capacities and it saddens me with regret that you wish to throw such gifts away.  No matter how diminished you think they are, no matter how out of practice of an ASMer you think you are compared to me, or SA, or Glain, you will always have a place in the history of FFH's great hackers.  I only hope that can continue.

FDC