Light Years

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Subtitles by explosiveskull

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<i>♪ Yeah, it's so catastrophic ♪</i>

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<i>♪ It's so catastrophic ♪</i>

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<i>♪ It's a catastrophe ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Yeah, it's so catastrophic ♪</i>

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00:00:14,724 --> 00:00:16,391
<i>♪ It's so catastrophic ♪</i>

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<i>♪ It's a catastrophe ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Well, sometimes
I get to thinking ♪</i>

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<i>♪ And my thinking
turns to drinking ♪</i>

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<i>♪ And then I am
a desperate man ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Well,
I wish it were more groovy ♪</i>

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<i>♪ But this
ain't no Disney movie ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Yes, I'm doing
the best that I can ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Yeah, it's so catastrophic ♪</i>

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<i>♪ It's so catastrophic ♪</i>

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<i>♪ It's a catastrophe ♪</i>

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- <i>Hey.</i>
- Yo.

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- <i>What's up?</i>
- Not bad, you?

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Dude, you're not going to
believe what I just saw.

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<i>I believe it.</i>

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Little gingerbread
baby walking out

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of the brick store,

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<i>can of Schweppes,
bag of Reese's,</i>

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<i>bag of Munchos, wearing
a strange broccoli tee.</i>

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- What the hell is that?
- Schweppes.

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Well, I can see that.

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<i>Shut up.</i>

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Right, well, he didn't
have any Munchos, but you...

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Reese's, and a Schweppes,
and a t-shirt.

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- Where'd you get that t-shirt?
- Be nice.

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<i>I'm guessing you
ate the mushrooms,</i>

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<i>but why would you call me then?</i>

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Why would I call
you if I was tripping?

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<i>That's what I'm saying,
okay, good.</i>

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I'm super.

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<i>I know, this day
still always jams me up.</i>

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- No, I mean I'm hungover.
- <i>Cute.</i>

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Okay, and now what are those?

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No, not your giblets,
the Reese's.

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Dude, it's 2017, and it's,
like, ten in the morning,

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would you go get
a seltzer, or kombucha?

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<i>So what are
you going to do today?</i>

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What do you mean? It's his
death day, what do I always do?

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I'm going to spike my brain with
mushrooms, you know, remember the...

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- listen to, and smell the earth.
- <i>Oh, man.</i>

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Give me a break, it's...
this is my therapy, okay?

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I don't need some
knucklehead, you know,

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- recycling who I was, and all the things I can't change.
- <i>Okay, okay, relax.</i>

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Pretty much count that
out for the next four hours.

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- Okay, Em.
- <i>That's nice.</i>

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Life is for living...

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even if we're killing the earth.

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<i>Yeah, well, if you
see him in the cosmos,</i>

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- <i>give him a kiss.</i>
- Will do.

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This is Apollo 34,
signing off, bye-bye.

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<i>Wait, hey...</i>

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You look like somebody I know,
you know, you look like somebody.

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Get out of here. Good day, sir.

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- Right?
- Right.

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Oh, fuck it.

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<i>♪ I dreamt of a fever ♪</i>

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<i>♪ One that would cure me
of this cold, winter set heart ♪</i>

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<i>♪ With heat to melt
these frozen tears ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Burned with reasons
as to carry on ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Into these twisted months ♪</i>

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<i>♪ I plunge without
a light to follow ♪</i>

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<i>♪ But I swear that
I would follow anything ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Just get me out of here ♪</i>

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<i>♪ But you get
six months to adapt ♪</i>

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<i>♪ And you get
two more to leave town ♪</i>

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<i>♪ And in the event
that you do adapt ♪</i>

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<i>♪ We still might not
want you around ♪</i>

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<i>♪ But I fell for the promise ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Of a life with a purpose ♪</i>

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<i>♪ But I know that
that's impossible now ♪</i>

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<i>♪ I give myself
three days to feel better ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Or else I swear, I'll
drive it off a fucking cliff ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Because if I can't learn
to make myself feel better ♪</i>

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<i>♪ How I can expect
anyone else to give a shit ♪</i>

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Too sanctimonious, come on.

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Yeah, no, it's super sancti...

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Dude, you cannot tell your
sister you got these from me,

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she will shit,
she will literally kill me.

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- I'm not going to tell her.
- I know.

85
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- So, like, what do I owe?
- We'll worry about that later,

86
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I don't want to, like, arm it
with some, like, transactional,

87
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- monetary construct.
- Yeah.

88
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So, why are you doing this?

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I don't know, it's
something to do, I guess.

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It's a trick question anyway,
you don't need a reason,

91
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- neither do they.
- Who?

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"Something to do," I like it.

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Okay, uh, yeah, but, like, um...

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what else?

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Just be...

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accepting.

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Get the hell out of here.

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That album's actually,
fucking, really good.

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<i>♪ She's just one of the girls ♪</i>

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<i>♪ She's not one of those ♪</i>

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<i>♪ One in a million ♪</i>

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<i>♪ As if two halves and
a whole was holding me down ♪</i>

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<i>♪ It's love and addiction ♪</i>

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<i>♪ So my heart is a loaded gun ♪</i>

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<i>♪ I thought she was
the one, brave one ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Always a step ahead ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Turning back to
watch me tripping us all up ♪</i>

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<i>♪ I stumble cover... ♪</i>

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So sick!

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<i>♪ She's not one in a million ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Having fun ♪</i>

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<i>♪ She's not one in a million ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Having fun ♪</i>

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<i>♪ So my heart is a... ♪</i>

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Yeah, Briggs,
you get first pick.

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- Why?
- Because that's how drafts work.

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- How's that?
- You're super dubs,

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like The Bangles,
the dubsiest team

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- gets the first pick.
- Yeah, you're dubs.

120
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- You don't get to say dubs.
- Why?

121
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Canadian exchange rate cheapens

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the currency of our humor.

123
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Ah! That's, well,
case and point.

124
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Anyway, come on.

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With the first pick in
the '99 Captain Stem Draft,

126
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the Dublin brings his select.

127
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A questionable pick, at best,

128
00:09:12,895 --> 00:09:14,330
it is as if the front
office gets off

129
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- on being gross, and terrible.
- I get next pick.

130
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Well, the second pick,
the Montreal Queensland.

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- Randy Moss.
- Nothing funny about a great athlete.

132
00:09:22,371 --> 00:09:26,075
And with the third pick
in the '99 Captain Stem Draft,

133
00:09:26,108 --> 00:09:28,510
the...

134
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I don't know what to call you.

135
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Me neither.

136
00:09:36,252 --> 00:09:37,152
Well...

137
00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:42,324
who...

138
00:09:42,358 --> 00:09:44,560
do you pick with a third pick?

139
00:09:44,593 --> 00:09:47,263
- With a third pick?
- With a third pick,

140
00:09:47,296 --> 00:09:50,566
- who do you pick with a third pick?
- With a third pick?

141
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Oh, my God.

142
00:09:55,037 --> 00:09:57,006
Fucking... Terry Guard!

143
00:09:57,039 --> 00:10:01,844
Whoa, like Jordan falling
in the third slot in '84!

144
00:10:01,877 --> 00:10:04,313
- This could go down in history.
- Fellas, ready to eat?

145
00:10:04,346 --> 00:10:06,382
Gordon Sumner,
a good day to you, sir.

146
00:10:06,415 --> 00:10:09,118
You said Bangels,
I thought it had to be football.

147
00:10:09,151 --> 00:10:11,020
- Brett Favre.
- Gotcha, God, we bid you a goodnight.

148
00:10:11,053 --> 00:10:12,988
Damn, God, with the

149
00:10:13,022 --> 00:10:15,291
- Oh, Gregory Peck, you're disgusting.
- Who is that?

150
00:10:15,324 --> 00:10:17,159
- I actually don't even know.
- Atticus Finch,

151
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double mint twins.

152
00:10:22,898 --> 00:10:24,933
Shouldn't we wait
until after dinner?

153
00:10:24,967 --> 00:10:27,069
No, this way it'll kick
in when we get to the party.

154
00:10:31,173 --> 00:10:32,241
Yeah, but...

155
00:10:35,577 --> 00:10:36,912
Fuck you guys!

156
00:10:42,318 --> 00:10:45,888
Yes, a perfectly
sane food to eat.

157
00:10:47,556 --> 00:10:50,259
All right, Briggs,
can you grab a chair?

158
00:10:50,292 --> 00:10:52,628
Sebba, put the plates,
silverware on the table.

159
00:10:52,661 --> 00:10:55,564
And Kev, pick me
out a winner Bobby.

160
00:11:00,936 --> 00:11:01,970
So sick!

161
00:11:03,072 --> 00:11:05,140
Oh, American Treasure, Larry,

162
00:11:05,174 --> 00:11:06,542
John Heiden, five words or less.

163
00:11:07,643 --> 00:11:11,080
"He is the best," four,
and I liked you a lot better

164
00:11:11,113 --> 00:11:12,381
when you called me Mr. Woodman.

165
00:11:12,414 --> 00:11:14,116
That was like ten years ago,

166
00:11:14,149 --> 00:11:16,418
I consider us friends now,
more than acquaintances...

167
00:11:16,452 --> 00:11:18,354
- I don't.
- Okay.

168
00:11:21,290 --> 00:11:22,324
- Dude.
- What?

169
00:11:22,358 --> 00:11:23,425
- Why did we?
- Dawg,

170
00:11:23,459 --> 00:11:25,027
- you're tripping.
- Right.

171
00:11:25,060 --> 00:11:26,428
No, you're tripping,
you're not tripping yet.

172
00:11:28,063 --> 00:11:28,964
Okay.

173
00:11:30,032 --> 00:11:31,500
I am kind of bubsed though.

174
00:11:31,533 --> 00:11:33,936
I am kind of bubsed though.

175
00:11:34,670 --> 00:11:37,539
Kev, get what you guys
want to drink, please.

176
00:11:37,573 --> 00:11:39,141
- Lar, let me have a Sierra?
- Nope.

177
00:11:39,174 --> 00:11:40,609
But it's springtime,
new beginnings?

178
00:11:40,642 --> 00:11:42,478
Don't care if it's doomsday.

179
00:11:42,511 --> 00:11:43,680
Doomsday's not a season.

180
00:11:43,713 --> 00:11:45,914
Agreed, I suppose
it's an eternity,

181
00:11:45,948 --> 00:11:46,648
let's eat.

182
00:11:49,251 --> 00:11:50,953
Sebba, have as much
as you want, buddy.

183
00:11:52,421 --> 00:11:53,655
What the hell's
wrong with you two?

184
00:11:58,994 --> 00:12:02,297
<i>♪ You were born to blunder ♪</i>

185
00:12:02,331 --> 00:12:06,135
<i>♪ Born to launder
born to wander ♪</i>

186
00:12:06,168 --> 00:12:10,372
<i>♪ Even when
you're six feet under ♪</i>

187
00:12:10,406 --> 00:12:12,174
<i>♪ There's a place ♪</i>

188
00:12:14,376 --> 00:12:18,647
<i>♪ You must go ♪</i>

189
00:12:18,681 --> 00:12:26,021
<i>♪ There's a place you must go ♪</i>

190
00:12:26,054 --> 00:12:27,356
I got to... dubs.

191
00:12:27,389 --> 00:12:28,590
What the hell's dubs again?

192
00:12:29,525 --> 00:12:32,394
Worthless, W, dubs.

193
00:12:32,428 --> 00:12:34,062
Yeah, that's a stretch.

194
00:12:34,096 --> 00:12:35,431
- That's stupid.
- Then you're dubs.

195
00:12:48,477 --> 00:12:50,479
What are you doing in here?

196
00:12:50,512 --> 00:12:52,514
You're not
supposed to be in this.

197
00:13:16,538 --> 00:13:17,740
Fourth rat.

198
00:13:56,679 --> 00:13:58,514
You are so bizarre.

199
00:14:05,722 --> 00:14:07,389
What the hell?

200
00:14:07,422 --> 00:14:08,323
Hey, you all right?

201
00:14:11,393 --> 00:14:12,494
It's a filet, man.

202
00:14:12,528 --> 00:14:14,363
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm eating it.

203
00:14:14,396 --> 00:14:17,232
It's just I wanted
meat and milk and meat...

204
00:14:18,735 --> 00:14:20,636
Where the hell's
this party again?

205
00:14:20,669 --> 00:14:21,738
Mikey OC's.

206
00:14:25,407 --> 00:14:27,476
That's an older crowd, man.

207
00:14:27,509 --> 00:14:29,111
Em will be there.

208
00:14:29,144 --> 00:14:30,445
- That's right.
- Yeah, but...

209
00:14:31,681 --> 00:14:33,683
- does she really want you guys hanging out?
- She loves us.

210
00:14:33,716 --> 00:14:35,217
- God, you love her.
- Grow up.

211
00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:37,319
All right, she
can get you guys home?

212
00:14:37,352 --> 00:14:38,287
Yeah.

213
00:14:40,389 --> 00:14:42,591
Look what you've done.

214
00:14:42,624 --> 00:14:44,226
Kev?

215
00:14:45,494 --> 00:14:46,395
Yeah?

216
00:14:47,697 --> 00:14:49,498
Great, that is great.

217
00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:53,736
- You two knuckleheads are just sleeping here?
- Yeah.

218
00:14:53,770 --> 00:14:55,705
- And your parents know?
- Oh, yeah.

219
00:14:57,573 --> 00:14:58,574
All right.

220
00:14:58,607 --> 00:14:59,842
- Dad?
- Yeah, bud?

221
00:15:05,380 --> 00:15:09,084
Wait, what are you going to, uh,
what are you going to do tonight?

222
00:15:09,919 --> 00:15:11,553
We can just hang here
with you, if you want,

223
00:15:11,587 --> 00:15:13,589
- we don't have to...
- We can go to that party.

224
00:15:13,622 --> 00:15:15,858
The Knicks are on
in about 45 minutes.

225
00:15:17,492 --> 00:15:20,629
What... sorry, they suck
for the next 20 years.

226
00:15:22,899 --> 00:15:24,333
You talk to your mom?

227
00:15:27,269 --> 00:15:29,706
- Sebba, you drive, buddy.
- Oh, sweet.

228
00:15:49,625 --> 00:15:50,927
<i>♪ Take your time
make your time ♪</i>

229
00:15:50,960 --> 00:15:52,294
<i>♪ I don't care ♪</i>

230
00:15:52,327 --> 00:15:54,496
<i>♪ Because I'm fine without you ♪</i>

231
00:15:55,664 --> 00:15:57,332
<i>♪ Would you mind it ♪</i>

232
00:16:00,837 --> 00:16:02,504
<i>♪ Making a visit to ♪</i>

233
00:16:02,537 --> 00:16:05,708
<i>♪ I'm okay
when I move within you ♪</i>

234
00:16:06,809 --> 00:16:08,945
<i>♪ Every light land ♪</i>

235
00:16:08,978 --> 00:16:10,947
<i>♪ Yeah ♪</i>

236
00:16:10,980 --> 00:16:15,183
<i>♪ I could be lying ♪</i>

237
00:16:15,217 --> 00:16:18,755
<i>♪ Following in my smooth ♪</i>

238
00:16:22,224 --> 00:16:26,194
<i>♪ Still I keep trying ♪</i>

239
00:16:26,228 --> 00:16:31,600
<i>♪ Telling myself
that I'm over you ♪</i>

240
00:16:34,503 --> 00:16:36,839
<i>♪ Little devil wise ♪</i>

241
00:16:36,873 --> 00:16:39,307
<i>♪ Will find the right place ♪</i>

242
00:16:40,542 --> 00:16:42,310
<i>♪ Will it get worse ♪</i>

243
00:16:45,447 --> 00:16:47,784
<i>♪ Try to keep my mind ♪</i>

244
00:16:47,817 --> 00:16:50,552
<i>♪ Off the same old ways ♪</i>

245
00:16:51,486 --> 00:16:54,656
<i>♪ Sticking to the one, girl ♪</i>

246
00:16:56,391 --> 00:16:57,794
Where's this
goddamn house again?

247
00:16:57,827 --> 00:16:59,561
- We can walk.
- What?

248
00:16:59,594 --> 00:17:00,863
I want to walk.

249
00:17:00,897 --> 00:17:04,332
- Why?
- Look at that fucking light.

250
00:17:04,366 --> 00:17:05,768
Would you stop swearing?

251
00:17:05,802 --> 00:17:07,770
- Where's the house?
- It's close, walkable.

252
00:17:08,871 --> 00:17:09,939
All right.

253
00:17:11,406 --> 00:17:14,711
All right, boys, you know, have fun,
be safe, don't eat the brown acid.

254
00:17:20,382 --> 00:17:23,552
- Dad.
- Yeah, bucko?

255
00:17:23,585 --> 00:17:25,320
You good?

256
00:17:25,353 --> 00:17:27,322
Yeah, I'm good.

257
00:17:28,958 --> 00:17:31,226
- You good?
- Yeah, yeah, I'm good.

258
00:17:33,730 --> 00:17:37,033
- Yeah?
- Yeah, why, no, yes, please.

259
00:17:37,066 --> 00:17:38,000
Shall we?

260
00:17:39,869 --> 00:17:40,770
Hey!

261
00:17:45,875 --> 00:17:46,776
Be good.

262
00:17:49,511 --> 00:17:50,412
Andrew.

263
00:17:51,848 --> 00:17:52,949
We got this, Mr. Woodman.

264
00:18:16,005 --> 00:18:17,940
Holy fuck!

265
00:18:17,974 --> 00:18:19,842
- Driving was wicked fun.
- How the hell?

266
00:18:19,876 --> 00:18:21,409
- He knows.
- No, he doesn't.

267
00:18:21,443 --> 00:18:22,845
Larry always makes
the brown acid joke.

268
00:18:22,879 --> 00:18:24,847
But, look at this,
I mean, it's unsavory,

269
00:18:24,881 --> 00:18:26,414
to say the least.

270
00:18:26,448 --> 00:18:28,316
- I mean, I mean look at him.
- Fuck you.

271
00:18:28,350 --> 00:18:30,019
No, no, man,
that's not what I'm saying,

272
00:18:30,052 --> 00:18:31,520
I'm acting like I'm acting...

273
00:18:31,553 --> 00:18:33,022
...and you're
acting like he's acting,

274
00:18:33,055 --> 00:18:35,091
and it's just, it's not good.

275
00:18:35,124 --> 00:18:36,826
I'm chill.

276
00:18:36,859 --> 00:18:39,461
Fine, then I'm
acting like I'm acting,

277
00:18:39,494 --> 00:18:41,964
it's become abundantly clear
that I'm wildly self-obsessed,

278
00:18:41,998 --> 00:18:43,632
and I'll be
the first to admit it.

279
00:18:43,665 --> 00:18:46,368
I feel all right,
mine haven't really kicked in.

280
00:18:50,106 --> 00:18:51,007
It's about to be a lot.

281
00:18:52,942 --> 00:18:54,609
Oh, hits, please.

282
00:18:57,379 --> 00:18:58,815
What is happening...

283
00:19:01,083 --> 00:19:02,384
in my belly brain?

284
00:19:03,085 --> 00:19:05,620
Well, son...

285
00:19:05,654 --> 00:19:07,957
the psilocybin you ate
is being metabolized

286
00:19:07,990 --> 00:19:10,827
into psilocin, activating
a cavalcade of serotonin,

287
00:19:10,860 --> 00:19:13,095
thus granting you
access to the wardrobe portal

288
00:19:13,129 --> 00:19:14,964
that leads to Narnia...

289
00:19:16,531 --> 00:19:17,432
give or take.

290
00:19:18,768 --> 00:19:22,637
Yes, yes, I think
I'm beginning to remember.

291
00:19:22,671 --> 00:19:23,873
Why do you have
to make everything so...

292
00:19:25,041 --> 00:19:27,877
- What, so what?
- Why can't you just chill?

293
00:19:27,910 --> 00:19:29,611
Like, let it all happen.

294
00:19:32,715 --> 00:19:35,650
Because that's what he does,
and that's the point.

295
00:19:35,685 --> 00:19:37,053
It doesn't even mean anything.

296
00:19:40,022 --> 00:19:42,424
Fuck you! And now my pants
are going to be all

297
00:19:42,457 --> 00:19:43,926
- messed up, this is bullshit!
- Hey!

298
00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:22,098
<i>♪ My old boyfriend called me
just to tell me I'm crazy ♪</i>

299
00:20:22,131 --> 00:20:25,634
- Hey, what is this, gay tag?
- <i>♪ Tell me that I'm the one who ♪</i>

300
00:20:25,667 --> 00:20:29,038
Fuck you,
Briggs wasn't frozen.

301
00:20:30,039 --> 00:20:32,540
- Ah!
- Stop, Briggs wasn't frozen,

302
00:20:32,574 --> 00:20:34,677
- because the chicken in the tree, and the egg in the woods.
- Egg tree!

303
00:20:34,710 --> 00:20:36,611
- What?
- Whistle!

304
00:20:36,645 --> 00:20:38,580
- Unfrozen.
- Fuck, now I'm it?

305
00:20:38,613 --> 00:20:39,849
- Frozen!
- Oh, shit, I get it!

306
00:20:39,882 --> 00:20:41,984
<i>♪ My old boyfriend writes me ♪</i>

307
00:20:42,018 --> 00:20:44,820
<i>♪ Because he thinks
that I'm the one to ♪</i>

308
00:20:44,854 --> 00:20:46,554
<i>♪ Embarrass me in public ♪</i>

309
00:20:46,588 --> 00:20:48,057
Frozen!

310
00:20:51,260 --> 00:20:55,765
<i>♪ The one he's sleeping with ♪</i>

311
00:21:00,036 --> 00:21:03,471
<i>♪ Old lovers come
like tax collectors ♪</i>

312
00:21:03,505 --> 00:21:06,574
<i>♪ Asking for the money
you know you've paid ♪</i>

313
00:21:06,608 --> 00:21:08,911
<i>♪ But old lovers
they are the great... ♪</i>

314
00:21:08,945 --> 00:21:10,980
Don't throw up.

315
00:21:15,851 --> 00:21:18,054
- What time is it?
- 8:50.

316
00:21:18,087 --> 00:21:19,521
Canadian time?

317
00:21:19,554 --> 00:21:20,790
We left the house at 8:30.

318
00:21:20,823 --> 00:21:22,624
Feels like a lifetime ago.

319
00:21:33,002 --> 00:21:35,204
What is wrong with Larry?

320
00:21:35,237 --> 00:21:36,872
Do you think
it's weird that, like...

321
00:21:38,074 --> 00:21:39,976
your parents have been
divorced for, like, a year,

322
00:21:40,009 --> 00:21:42,912
and your dad still
has stuff in boxes?

323
00:21:42,945 --> 00:21:46,248
What the fuck? In what
time space continuum would...

324
00:21:47,183 --> 00:21:50,686
If I remember correctly,
it hasn't been a year,

325
00:21:50,720 --> 00:21:52,188
and I think a lot
of things are weird.

326
00:21:52,221 --> 00:21:53,956
I think Ostertag
just fucked around,

327
00:21:53,990 --> 00:21:55,291
and got a triple-double.

328
00:21:55,324 --> 00:21:57,525
Ostertag's never
had a triple-double.

329
00:21:57,559 --> 00:22:00,196
Who the... fuck is this?

330
00:22:03,899 --> 00:22:05,801
Oh, motherfucker.

331
00:22:05,835 --> 00:22:07,203
Zabbadoo.

332
00:22:11,774 --> 00:22:12,708
What's up, Kev?

333
00:22:13,776 --> 00:22:14,844
Briggs, fucking sketch ball.

334
00:22:18,280 --> 00:22:22,918
- Hop in.
- Oh, Jesus, that's... selfish.

335
00:22:25,821 --> 00:22:26,989
Don't look at me like that.

336
00:22:27,023 --> 00:22:28,791
Yeah, what's funny?

337
00:22:28,824 --> 00:22:29,725
I'm getting a ride.

338
00:22:30,960 --> 00:22:32,161
See you there.

339
00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:45,708
Man...

340
00:22:45,741 --> 00:22:48,277
it is crazy
you used to date her.

341
00:22:49,779 --> 00:22:50,513
Yeah, dude...

342
00:22:51,847 --> 00:22:53,849
I used to
do a lot of crazy things,

343
00:22:53,883 --> 00:22:56,651
when I wasn't tripping
my balls off.

344
00:22:57,353 --> 00:23:02,691
Ridiculous,
when I wasn't, so good.

345
00:23:02,725 --> 00:23:05,361
I always seem to space when we
have to go to this fucking party.

346
00:23:05,394 --> 00:23:08,697
Yeah, seems highly questionable.

347
00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:15,271
Sir, I just don't see
the point in omission.

348
00:23:15,304 --> 00:23:19,708
Sir, if I may speak
freely, we are outmanned,

349
00:23:19,742 --> 00:23:22,344
roughly 102 and a half.

350
00:23:22,378 --> 00:23:25,281
- Sir, it's a numbers game.
- Sir, I just want to know,

351
00:23:25,314 --> 00:23:27,850
yes, sir, I quite
understand the stakes.

352
00:23:27,883 --> 00:23:30,319
Sir, it just seems
really poorly planned.

353
00:23:30,352 --> 00:23:32,922
Sir, he's not telling
you how to do your job,

354
00:23:32,955 --> 00:23:36,725
- it's, it's, it's...
- Sir, it's a suicide mission, and you know it!

355
00:23:36,759 --> 00:23:41,097
Sir, I'm begging you,
look at me, look at me.

356
00:23:41,130 --> 00:23:43,132
- Sir, look at me.
- Look at me, sir.

357
00:23:43,165 --> 00:23:44,300
- Sir, look at me.
- Look at me!

358
00:23:44,333 --> 00:23:45,935
- Sir, look at me.
- Look at me.

359
00:23:45,968 --> 00:23:47,736
- Sir, look at me.
- Sir.

360
00:23:47,770 --> 00:23:49,604
- Look at him!
- Sir, I'll suck your dick.

361
00:24:08,958 --> 00:24:10,359
What's up, Neil?

362
00:24:18,234 --> 00:24:19,268
Did he just rip a davy?

363
00:24:20,870 --> 00:24:21,770
Sir.

364
00:24:23,739 --> 00:24:24,840
Look at me.

365
00:24:28,344 --> 00:24:31,280
- Chill.
- You fucking chill, I'm not chill.

366
00:24:31,313 --> 00:24:33,182
Is that
little Kevin Woodman?

367
00:24:33,215 --> 00:24:34,783
- That hurts.
- Bounce.

368
00:24:38,053 --> 00:24:38,954
Hi.

369
00:24:41,824 --> 00:24:43,726
I haven't seen
your sister yet, but...

370
00:24:43,759 --> 00:24:45,928
She'll be here, or...
I will burn this.

371
00:24:45,961 --> 00:24:47,196
You two are just the cutest,

372
00:24:47,229 --> 00:24:48,797
and now you're grown up,

373
00:24:48,831 --> 00:24:51,033
and it's just not right.

374
00:24:54,970 --> 00:24:58,440
- How is everything?
- I mean, pants got a little wet playing freeze tag,

375
00:24:58,474 --> 00:25:00,809
but you know how that goes.

376
00:25:00,843 --> 00:25:03,212
Come with me,
we'll get you out of those.

377
00:25:03,245 --> 00:25:05,147
Mikey has a dry pair
you can wear,

378
00:25:05,181 --> 00:25:07,082
- we'll get those in the drier.
- Please, no,

379
00:25:07,116 --> 00:25:09,118
because it's just pants,
and a pokey

380
00:25:09,151 --> 00:25:10,986
jumped over the spoon tonight.

381
00:25:11,020 --> 00:25:12,855
They might be a little big...

382
00:25:13,889 --> 00:25:14,790
but they're dry.

383
00:25:21,931 --> 00:25:23,332
How are you though, sweetie?

384
00:25:23,365 --> 00:25:25,034
Fucking boxers,
fucking ridiculous.

385
00:25:28,938 --> 00:25:31,307
Divorce can be so hard on you kids.

386
00:25:31,340 --> 00:25:32,474
No, that's...

387
00:25:33,809 --> 00:25:36,412
Um, no, I think, uh...

388
00:25:37,780 --> 00:25:39,014
that everybody
should get divorced.

389
00:25:40,216 --> 00:25:42,885
No, I mean, I got
a couple things going on,

390
00:25:42,918 --> 00:25:44,119
but I'm all right.

391
00:25:45,921 --> 00:25:46,822
No.

392
00:25:48,524 --> 00:25:49,425
No?

393
00:25:56,966 --> 00:25:57,967
Come here.

394
00:26:03,405 --> 00:26:04,773
Mom, what the fuck?

395
00:26:12,514 --> 00:26:13,916
Nice mouth, Mikey.

396
00:26:14,850 --> 00:26:16,785
I was getting
Kevin some dry pants.

397
00:26:19,121 --> 00:26:20,155
Here you are, sweetie.

398
00:26:21,357 --> 00:26:25,294
I didn't... do, I didn't want
pants, I mean, your pants,

399
00:26:25,327 --> 00:26:27,162
I mean, my pants were
the ones that were wanted.

400
00:26:31,834 --> 00:26:33,135
Please...

401
00:26:34,336 --> 00:26:35,371
you're sleeping with his sister.

402
00:26:36,505 --> 00:26:39,908
The least you can do is
let him wear your dry pants.

403
00:26:44,113 --> 00:26:45,014
Be sweet.

404
00:26:54,523 --> 00:26:55,958
You going to put on
those fucking pants, or what?

405
00:27:19,048 --> 00:27:21,950
<i>♪ Out of my mind ♪</i>

406
00:27:37,900 --> 00:27:39,935
<i>I'm guessing
you ate the mushrooms.</i>

407
00:27:39,968 --> 00:27:41,070
Hey, baby boy.

408
00:27:46,508 --> 00:27:50,245
Oh, no.

409
00:27:50,279 --> 00:27:52,181
No, no, no, no, no...

410
00:27:52,214 --> 00:27:54,016
- Wait, quit it.
- Please, come on. You just texted me,

411
00:27:54,049 --> 00:27:55,250
let's just hang
out for a second, please,

412
00:27:55,284 --> 00:27:56,385
let's hang out for a second.

413
00:27:58,487 --> 00:28:02,157
Oh, oh, ah, yes,

414
00:28:02,191 --> 00:28:04,159
fuck yeah, I love you.

415
00:28:04,193 --> 00:28:05,527
Kev.

416
00:28:05,561 --> 00:28:06,462
What?

417
00:28:08,497 --> 00:28:09,431
I love you too.

418
00:28:10,399 --> 00:28:11,300
Let's get a beer.

419
00:28:18,574 --> 00:28:21,143
- Hey.
- What?

420
00:28:21,176 --> 00:28:23,946
Can you just,
just call mom, please?

421
00:28:23,979 --> 00:28:27,349
I don't think
now is the best time.

422
00:28:28,384 --> 00:28:29,686
I mean, like, soon.

423
00:28:29,719 --> 00:28:32,321
- Yeah, I know what you meant.
- Okay.

424
00:28:32,354 --> 00:28:35,224
Maybe it just doesn't
have anything to do with you.

425
00:28:35,257 --> 00:28:39,561
Nothing to do with me,
that's rich, I wish.

426
00:28:39,595 --> 00:28:41,597
Well, how are we talking
about this right now?

427
00:28:41,630 --> 00:28:43,932
- Because maybe it doesn't have anything to do with me.
- What?

428
00:28:43,966 --> 00:28:44,900
What?

429
00:28:46,168 --> 00:28:47,102
Okay.

430
00:28:53,275 --> 00:28:55,144
Listen, you got to
understand that life's...

431
00:28:55,177 --> 00:28:57,246
- <i>I mean, who cares.</i>
- ...so short.

432
00:29:01,417 --> 00:29:03,218
Oh, mama.

433
00:29:05,354 --> 00:29:06,689
All right.

434
00:29:06,723 --> 00:29:07,656
Life's so short?

435
00:29:09,191 --> 00:29:12,661
- You're a dude, and a child.
- Perhaps.

436
00:29:12,695 --> 00:29:15,497
There's an accumulation,
and a lifetime of s...

437
00:29:18,300 --> 00:29:19,201
I'll call her.

438
00:29:29,746 --> 00:29:32,047
- I get it.
- I'm sure you do.

439
00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:33,482
- No, I do.
- Yeah? Lay it on me.

440
00:29:33,515 --> 00:29:34,416
No, not like...

441
00:29:36,318 --> 00:29:39,689
it's, uh, it's
the beer thing, oh, my God.

442
00:29:43,459 --> 00:29:45,060
There's mercy in a cold beer.

443
00:29:45,093 --> 00:29:48,363
That's a slippery slope,
but preach, baby boy.

444
00:29:52,301 --> 00:29:54,470
I want it colder though, it
should be colder, shouldn't it?

445
00:29:55,437 --> 00:29:57,172
You know who takes
temperature seriously?

446
00:29:57,206 --> 00:29:59,308
Dad does, big temperature guy.

447
00:30:00,275 --> 00:30:02,712
He'll put ice in his beer,
I've only ever seen him do that.

448
00:30:06,582 --> 00:30:07,516
I'm going to do it.

449
00:30:12,621 --> 00:30:15,390
- What?
- Nothing.

450
00:30:15,424 --> 00:30:18,293
- You think it's sketch?
- No.

451
00:30:18,327 --> 00:30:20,028
Think I should do it?

452
00:30:20,062 --> 00:30:21,029
I do.

453
00:30:27,669 --> 00:30:30,172
- What's up, baby?
- Hi.

454
00:30:31,573 --> 00:30:33,141
Yo, you seen your brother
here? He's, like,

455
00:30:33,175 --> 00:30:35,310
wearing my pants and shit.

456
00:30:35,344 --> 00:30:38,247
- Yeah, they did seem a little militant for him.
- What's up?

457
00:30:39,281 --> 00:30:40,649
Is that ice in your beer?

458
00:30:40,683 --> 00:30:42,518
The fuck is that shit?

459
00:30:42,551 --> 00:30:44,586
Did I see you
put ice in your beer?

460
00:30:44,620 --> 00:30:48,490
That is so steely Dan,
Larry puts ice in his beer,

461
00:30:48,524 --> 00:30:50,025
he's so bizarre.

462
00:30:51,460 --> 00:30:53,830
I'm doing it, where's the ice?

463
00:30:53,863 --> 00:30:56,398
What on earth is the military...

464
00:30:56,431 --> 00:30:58,066
Hey, no, no, no.

465
00:31:08,277 --> 00:31:09,511
What?

466
00:31:09,545 --> 00:31:12,214
What the fuck?

467
00:31:12,247 --> 00:31:13,482
Where's the ice,
where's the beer?

468
00:31:14,817 --> 00:31:17,252
You can't leave him
over there, you insane?

469
00:31:20,188 --> 00:31:22,457
Oh, look at this.

470
00:31:28,130 --> 00:31:28,865
The sound of my own voice.

471
00:31:31,901 --> 00:31:33,770
Gross, why'd you bounce on me?

472
00:31:33,803 --> 00:31:36,672
Uh, I didn't bounce on you,
I bounced on Mrs. Glovel.

473
00:31:36,706 --> 00:31:37,639
What happened?

474
00:31:38,640 --> 00:31:43,612
Oh, uh, good try,
good try to articulate that,

475
00:31:43,645 --> 00:31:45,647
that's a dog chasing its tail,

476
00:31:45,682 --> 00:31:48,317
infinite Russian dolls
in the house.

477
00:31:52,154 --> 00:31:53,690
What shit is that?

478
00:31:53,723 --> 00:31:54,623
Shit...

479
00:31:55,557 --> 00:31:57,225
pills, I don't know, contraband.

480
00:31:57,259 --> 00:31:58,460
Yeah, I know what it is.

481
00:32:01,597 --> 00:32:02,497
Hey!

482
00:32:04,834 --> 00:32:06,134
What am I supposed to do?

483
00:32:08,370 --> 00:32:09,371
Not sure.

484
00:32:19,448 --> 00:32:20,415
Got a lot.

485
00:32:25,955 --> 00:32:27,222
I'll tell you what though.

486
00:32:29,224 --> 00:32:30,258
Tell me.

487
00:32:31,560 --> 00:32:32,461
Tell me.

488
00:32:49,344 --> 00:32:52,180
- There's mercy in that cup.
- There's mercy in that cup.

489
00:32:52,214 --> 00:32:55,317
Fun, there's mercy in this cup.

490
00:32:55,350 --> 00:32:56,786
Mercy in the cup.

491
00:32:56,819 --> 00:33:00,522
There's mercy in the cup.

492
00:33:00,555 --> 00:33:03,325
There's mercy in the cup!

493
00:33:03,358 --> 00:33:06,929
<i>♪ In the cup
cup, cup, mercy ♪</i>

494
00:33:06,963 --> 00:33:09,231
<i>♪ There's mercy
in the cup, cup, cup ♪</i>

495
00:33:09,264 --> 00:33:10,867
<i>♪ In the cup there's mercy ♪</i>

496
00:33:10,900 --> 00:33:12,902
<i>♪ Mercy, mercy, mercy
mercy in the cup ♪</i>

497
00:33:12,935 --> 00:33:15,203
<i>♪ There's mercy in the cup ♪</i>

498
00:33:15,237 --> 00:33:18,674
- Mercy in the cup!
- Okay.

499
00:33:26,448 --> 00:33:27,549
Fuck is that?

500
00:33:27,582 --> 00:33:29,251
Ladies and gentlemen,

501
00:33:29,284 --> 00:33:30,887
ladies and gentlemen,

502
00:33:30,920 --> 00:33:33,990
please, keep laughing,
kissing, drinking,

503
00:33:34,023 --> 00:33:36,324
and drinking,
this is only a sound check,

504
00:33:36,358 --> 00:33:38,193
this is only a sound check.

505
00:33:48,270 --> 00:33:49,939
For my first trick,
I will pull a rabbit

506
00:33:49,972 --> 00:33:53,009
out of my...

507
00:34:18,701 --> 00:34:20,268
I love you guys.

508
00:34:21,003 --> 00:34:23,005
I'm going to go try to get
somebody to touch my penis.

509
00:34:36,085 --> 00:34:38,988
- You guys lost your shit in there.
- What, when?

510
00:34:39,021 --> 00:34:42,390
I don't know, you were just screaming
about something in your cups.

511
00:34:42,424 --> 00:34:44,861
Well, it was for a good cause.

512
00:34:44,894 --> 00:34:46,461
Do mushrooms make you horny?

513
00:34:47,930 --> 00:34:49,531
I'm so horny.

514
00:34:49,564 --> 00:34:51,433
Are you guys horny?

515
00:34:51,466 --> 00:34:55,470
Why do you have to say horny
like that, and so many times?

516
00:34:55,504 --> 00:34:57,539
- Horny and mushrooms don't rhyme.
- I would have sex with

517
00:34:57,572 --> 00:34:59,942
anybody on any substance,
but you do not have

518
00:34:59,976 --> 00:35:02,310
to say horny like that.

519
00:35:02,344 --> 00:35:04,546
- You guys are gay.
- Us, gay?

520
00:35:04,579 --> 00:35:07,984
- No.
- Everybody's a little gay.

521
00:35:08,017 --> 00:35:09,952
Biologically speaking.

522
00:35:09,986 --> 00:35:11,653
You just got to shove it down.

523
00:35:13,455 --> 00:35:14,991
I'm definitely zero gay.

524
00:35:15,024 --> 00:35:16,692
Which thus, makes
you gayer than Christmas.

525
00:35:18,795 --> 00:35:21,496
Whatever, there's, like,
so many chicks in there,

526
00:35:21,530 --> 00:35:24,399
and you guys are in the corner
like jerking each other off.

527
00:35:24,432 --> 00:35:27,335
Did...
we jerk each other off?

528
00:35:27,369 --> 00:35:30,472
I mean, I don't... think so,

529
00:35:30,505 --> 00:35:31,841
but I'm not really
in charge at the moment.

530
00:35:31,874 --> 00:35:33,943
Am I interrupting something?

531
00:35:35,978 --> 00:35:38,915
No, this is, uh,
this is stupid, we were just...

532
00:35:38,948 --> 00:35:40,683
- I am going to...
- Get a beer?

533
00:35:40,716 --> 00:35:41,616
Yup.

534
00:35:50,492 --> 00:35:52,128
Sorry.

535
00:35:52,161 --> 00:35:53,062
For what?

536
00:35:54,263 --> 00:35:57,599
I wasn't... for the hugging,
I was not hugging you on...

537
00:35:58,835 --> 00:35:59,969
purpose.

538
00:36:00,002 --> 00:36:01,103
We hugged.

539
00:36:02,504 --> 00:36:03,306
We certainly did.

540
00:36:07,176 --> 00:36:08,343
How you doing?

541
00:36:11,013 --> 00:36:12,882
Good, pretty good.

542
00:36:12,915 --> 00:36:14,717
- I'm sorry if this is...
- I'm on mushrooms.

543
00:36:16,484 --> 00:36:18,553
- What?
- What?

544
00:36:18,587 --> 00:36:20,522
No. Is this weird?

545
00:36:20,555 --> 00:36:22,992
It, I mean, is it...

546
00:36:24,426 --> 00:36:27,897
it's all relative I guess.

547
00:36:27,930 --> 00:36:29,966
I mean, on a scale
of weird to...

548
00:36:32,567 --> 00:36:33,635
What are we talking about?

549
00:36:34,837 --> 00:36:37,740
- Kevin, you don't have to try and be cool.
- I'm not cool.

550
00:36:38,875 --> 00:36:40,076
- Whatever.
- I'm on mushrooms.

551
00:36:42,945 --> 00:36:46,581
I mean, it's all pretty weird.

552
00:36:46,615 --> 00:36:47,817
I guess it's not that weird.

553
00:36:50,019 --> 00:36:52,520
I'd like to have
kids at some point,

554
00:36:52,554 --> 00:36:54,724
but now that
seems irresponsible.

555
00:37:00,997 --> 00:37:02,497
What were we talking about?

556
00:37:02,530 --> 00:37:04,666
Am I having this trip?

557
00:37:04,700 --> 00:37:06,468
What'd you guys eat?

558
00:37:06,501 --> 00:37:08,738
- Mushrooms.
- And you just left him out there?

559
00:37:10,239 --> 00:37:11,140
It was scary.

560
00:37:13,743 --> 00:37:14,911
My hands were tied.

561
00:37:16,045 --> 00:37:20,149
I don't know why
I even asked, or... cared.

562
00:37:23,485 --> 00:37:25,988
Oh, right.

563
00:37:26,022 --> 00:37:30,159
Is it because
you're here with...

564
00:37:35,131 --> 00:37:39,802
Well, fuck, so many
weird things in the world,

565
00:37:40,736 --> 00:37:43,706
but what I think
you're asking is not weird,

566
00:37:43,739 --> 00:37:44,807
it's just funny.

567
00:37:47,176 --> 00:37:48,110
Why?

568
00:37:50,578 --> 00:37:52,514
Because he's a fucking loser.

569
00:37:58,154 --> 00:37:59,055
What?

570
00:38:03,993 --> 00:38:05,194
You broke up with me.

571
00:38:08,530 --> 00:38:09,832
You think you're
better than everybody.

572
00:38:16,571 --> 00:38:18,908
You guys must
be getting eaten up.

573
00:38:18,941 --> 00:38:20,743
Kev, could I?

574
00:38:31,153 --> 00:38:33,155
Why'd she have
to say that so hurt?

575
00:38:33,189 --> 00:38:34,991
Because you broke up
with her for the...

576
00:38:35,024 --> 00:38:36,826
because she had bigger breasts.

577
00:38:38,728 --> 00:38:39,627
That's...

578
00:38:41,629 --> 00:38:42,898
so fucked up.

579
00:38:44,599 --> 00:38:49,705
And such a weird,
and scary way to behave.

580
00:38:54,076 --> 00:38:55,945
Being a dude is so hard.

581
00:38:55,978 --> 00:38:58,948
Oh,
that one wins the night.

582
00:39:01,717 --> 00:39:03,618
Do you think I think
I'm better than everybody?

583
00:39:03,651 --> 00:39:05,187
Big time.

584
00:39:05,221 --> 00:39:07,923
I don't think that, especially...

585
00:39:07,957 --> 00:39:08,991
You don't think what?

586
00:39:12,862 --> 00:39:16,232
- That I think I'm better than everybody. Shh!
- Oh, absolutely.

587
00:39:16,265 --> 00:39:17,133
I don't.

588
00:39:21,370 --> 00:39:23,105
Like he's ordering poutine.

589
00:39:23,139 --> 00:39:26,075
Oh, he's going to give
her the Aberdool snow plow.

590
00:39:26,108 --> 00:39:29,145
He'll
give her the Sherbrick Zamboni.

591
00:39:29,178 --> 00:39:33,149
- Yuck, he'll probably go with the Mont Tremblant Super G.
- You don't even ski.

592
00:39:33,182 --> 00:39:35,317
- He will, however, give her the.
- Enough!

593
00:39:37,319 --> 00:39:39,188
I have to get
you guys out of here.

594
00:39:41,023 --> 00:39:44,626
Keep playing this game,
I'll be back, don't go anywhere!

595
00:39:47,063 --> 00:39:48,663
The Shambley snow shoe.

596
00:40:11,720 --> 00:40:16,192
That brother of yours,
I just want to eat him up.

597
00:40:16,225 --> 00:40:18,626
- He's edible.
- I'll say.

598
00:40:22,965 --> 00:40:27,770
I am so happy that you
and Michael are together.

599
00:40:29,671 --> 00:40:30,372
Together?

600
00:40:32,708 --> 00:40:34,777
- In the sense that...
- You're perfect for each other.

601
00:40:40,116 --> 00:40:41,016
I know you.

602
00:40:43,119 --> 00:40:43,986
Oh, honey.

603
00:40:46,155 --> 00:40:48,124
Do me a favor,
don't be in such a rush...

604
00:40:50,359 --> 00:40:51,293
because...

605
00:40:53,162 --> 00:40:55,731
like it or not,
and sooner than later...

606
00:40:57,766 --> 00:40:58,767
the brakes
are going to go out...

607
00:40:59,969 --> 00:41:04,106
and by the time
you regain any control, well...

608
00:41:06,876 --> 00:41:08,110
nobody gives a shit.

609
00:41:11,046 --> 00:41:12,148
Jell-o shot?

610
00:41:23,993 --> 00:41:25,828
Psst,
are you going to change it?

611
00:41:25,861 --> 00:41:28,164
- Not a chance.
- Come on.

612
00:41:29,265 --> 00:41:32,101
Are you kidding me? They got a pretention
that I'm productive right now, besides,

613
00:41:32,134 --> 00:41:33,269
there's nothing
good here anyway.

614
00:41:40,109 --> 00:41:42,444
Oh, sick.

615
00:41:42,478 --> 00:41:44,013
Nope.

616
00:41:44,046 --> 00:41:46,749
He's banging your sister
with his pinky...-

617
00:41:46,782 --> 00:41:49,385
Chill, chill, chill, chill.

618
00:41:51,754 --> 00:41:53,322
You're so fucking
violent sometimes.

619
00:41:54,890 --> 00:41:55,958
Should I do it?

620
00:42:09,772 --> 00:42:12,341
<i>♪ Well, once upon a time a ♪</i>

621
00:42:12,374 --> 00:42:16,812
<i>♪ Penis and a vagina
made a baby ♪</i>

622
00:42:18,214 --> 00:42:20,382
<i>♪ Well, there must
have been a demon ♪</i>

623
00:42:20,416 --> 00:42:25,187
<i>♪ Somewhere in that egg
or semen, it was crazy ♪</i>

624
00:42:26,822 --> 00:42:29,258
<i>♪ The baby wasn't on the level ♪</i>

625
00:42:29,291 --> 00:42:31,193
<i>♪ The offspring of the devil ♪</i>

626
00:42:31,227 --> 00:42:35,130
<i>♪ And an evil flower bloomed ♪</i>

627
00:42:35,164 --> 00:42:37,433
<i>♪ Well, it grew into a man ♪</i>

628
00:42:37,466 --> 00:42:39,768
<i>♪ Spreading evil
across the land ♪</i>

629
00:42:39,802 --> 00:42:43,339
<i>♪ And the human race
was doomed ♪</i>

630
00:42:43,372 --> 00:42:47,409
<i>♪ Yeah, it's so catastrophic
it's so catastrophic ♪</i>

631
00:42:47,443 --> 00:42:50,846
<i>♪ It's a catastrophe ♪</i>

632
00:42:52,348 --> 00:42:56,318
<i>♪ Yeah, it's so catastrophic
it's so catastrophic ♪</i>

633
00:42:56,352 --> 00:42:59,054
<i>♪ It's a catastrophe ♪</i>

634
00:43:01,457 --> 00:43:05,027
<i>♪ It's so catastrophic
it's so catastrophic ♪</i>

635
00:43:05,060 --> 00:43:07,763
<i>♪ It's a catastrophe ♪</i>

636
00:43:09,331 --> 00:43:13,135
<i>♪ Yeah, it's catastrophic
it's catastrophic ♪</i>

637
00:43:22,411 --> 00:43:24,947
Shit, sophomore, man?

638
00:43:24,980 --> 00:43:27,082
Sophomore? Exactly.

639
00:43:27,116 --> 00:43:30,419
Changing my music,
wearing my pants,

640
00:43:30,452 --> 00:43:33,822
hugging my moms, bag of pennies,

641
00:43:33,856 --> 00:43:35,257
the fuck is that weird ass shit?

642
00:43:37,860 --> 00:43:39,495
Do you want to do this
publicly or privately?

643
00:43:40,596 --> 00:43:44,066
- Do what?
- I'm just saying, there's some disrespect here

644
00:43:44,099 --> 00:43:45,200
that needs to be dealt with.

645
00:43:46,368 --> 00:43:51,206
- I should, private, privately?
- I don't even hug my mom.

646
00:43:51,240 --> 00:43:53,342
- Am I going to get beat up?
- No,

647
00:43:53,375 --> 00:43:56,445
nobody's getting beat,
we're leaving.

648
00:43:57,613 --> 00:44:01,450
And in case I don't see you, good
afternoon, good evening, and good night.

649
00:44:05,287 --> 00:44:10,125
Listen, your choice,
anywhere in the world,

650
00:44:10,159 --> 00:44:12,261
I mean, anywhere within
a reasonable driving distance,

651
00:44:12,294 --> 00:44:16,832
but anywhere,
where do you want to go?

652
00:44:18,267 --> 00:44:21,003
- It's your funeral, baby boy.
- Why are we leaving?

653
00:44:21,036 --> 00:44:23,205
You said anywhere,
and that's what I want to do,

654
00:44:23,238 --> 00:44:24,973
it'll take 20 minutes.

655
00:44:25,007 --> 00:44:27,409
Oh, I'm not sticking around
to see how long it takes.

656
00:44:29,078 --> 00:44:30,979
- Did you?
- No, she just jerked me off.

657
00:44:33,282 --> 00:44:34,650
With your penis?

658
00:44:34,684 --> 00:44:36,652
Uh, yeah.

659
00:44:36,686 --> 00:44:38,387
Where do you even start?

660
00:44:38,420 --> 00:44:40,155
- What do you mean?
- Have you looked at it?

661
00:44:40,189 --> 00:44:41,990
- At what?
- Your johnson!

662
00:44:42,024 --> 00:44:44,226
Yeah, guys, I'm uncircumcised,
that joke's super old...

663
00:44:44,259 --> 00:44:47,496
- It's not that.
- But that does make it exponentially weirder.

664
00:44:47,529 --> 00:44:49,298
It's just, it's dicks,
man, dicks in general,

665
00:44:49,331 --> 00:44:51,400
my dick had a moment tonight,

666
00:44:51,433 --> 00:44:53,502
and let's call it a lesson
learned, do not look

667
00:44:53,535 --> 00:44:56,071
at your dick on mushrooms.

668
00:44:56,105 --> 00:44:57,606
That's not what she said.

669
00:44:57,639 --> 00:44:59,208
Enough dicks.

670
00:45:00,476 --> 00:45:03,045
It just beggars the question...

671
00:45:06,515 --> 00:45:08,283
what even is it?

672
00:45:08,317 --> 00:45:10,619
Seriously, what even is it?

673
00:45:10,652 --> 00:45:13,322
Seriously, what even is it?

674
00:45:13,355 --> 00:45:16,458
- Aw, here we go.
- What even is it?

675
00:45:16,492 --> 00:45:18,460
What... even is it?

676
00:45:18,494 --> 00:45:20,295
- What even is it?
- What even is it?

677
00:45:21,698 --> 00:45:25,200
- What even is it?
- What even is it?

678
00:45:26,301 --> 00:45:27,636
What even is it?

679
00:45:27,669 --> 00:45:29,304
Enough, guys!

680
00:45:31,273 --> 00:45:34,943
Just because you
repeat and squeal things,

681
00:45:34,977 --> 00:45:39,181
it doesn't make, like,
the source material funnier.

682
00:45:39,214 --> 00:45:40,182
Yeah!

683
00:45:43,686 --> 00:45:45,521
Em, can I ask you a serious
question though, seriously?

684
00:45:45,554 --> 00:45:47,589
- It's a penis, Briggs.
- Damnit.

685
00:45:47,623 --> 00:45:51,560
Please, just shut up
for one minute.

686
00:47:47,276 --> 00:47:48,410
Perfect.

687
00:47:49,746 --> 00:47:51,346
What?

688
00:47:51,380 --> 00:47:52,682
Nothing.

689
00:47:54,650 --> 00:47:56,351
- What's perfect?
- Nothing.

690
00:47:57,352 --> 00:47:58,755
It's, uh...

691
00:48:00,455 --> 00:48:03,091
fuck, Mikey's mom...

692
00:48:03,125 --> 00:48:06,161
- Yeah, she's a handful.
- ...said, and we're

693
00:48:06,194 --> 00:48:08,597
hardly going out...

694
00:48:10,499 --> 00:48:15,738
she said that we
were perfect together...

695
00:48:17,306 --> 00:48:19,474
him and me.

696
00:48:20,877 --> 00:48:24,179
I mean, granted,
she's the Jell-O shot queen

697
00:48:24,212 --> 00:48:26,381
of Chittaning County, said
to be taken with a whole salt

698
00:48:26,415 --> 00:48:28,383
lake or a mine but...

699
00:48:31,320 --> 00:48:32,454
perfect.

700
00:48:33,622 --> 00:48:36,458
Oh, shit, you're tripping,
you don't want to hear this.

701
00:48:38,193 --> 00:48:40,295
- No.
- Anyway.

702
00:48:41,764 --> 00:48:43,565
- No.
- What?

703
00:48:47,837 --> 00:48:49,706
You think you're
better than everybody.

704
00:48:49,739 --> 00:48:50,672
What?

705
00:48:51,908 --> 00:48:53,375
No.

706
00:48:53,408 --> 00:48:55,143
- Yeah, dude.
- No,

707
00:48:55,177 --> 00:48:56,511
I definitely do not.

708
00:48:56,545 --> 00:49:00,148
I am better than him,
that's for sure.

709
00:49:04,821 --> 00:49:05,788
Fuck you.

710
00:49:07,957 --> 00:49:09,926
I am, you're not.

711
00:49:09,959 --> 00:49:11,794
Oh, I'm definitely not.

712
00:49:11,828 --> 00:49:15,197
Oh, my God, that just
screams that you think you are,

713
00:49:15,230 --> 00:49:16,632
at least I can admit it.

714
00:49:16,665 --> 00:49:18,266
No, no, no, see...

715
00:49:19,468 --> 00:49:21,436
I'm not, I promise you I'm not,

716
00:49:21,470 --> 00:49:24,606
factually, and in my brain,
I am for sure not.

717
00:49:24,640 --> 00:49:27,777
I am, in my brain, and on paper.

718
00:49:31,346 --> 00:49:34,249
Yeah, well, most of the time
I think you are too.

719
00:49:36,251 --> 00:49:38,286
You don't have to be
all nice and sincere about it.

720
00:49:41,623 --> 00:49:43,425
Buzzkill.

721
00:49:43,458 --> 00:49:47,429
Yeah, well,
I'm getting old.

722
00:49:54,837 --> 00:49:57,707
Schweppes, Munchos, repeat.

723
00:50:00,242 --> 00:50:01,878
Take care of him.

724
00:50:05,280 --> 00:50:07,784
Man, don't say that now.

725
00:50:09,819 --> 00:50:11,553
- Oh, my God!
- What?

726
00:50:11,586 --> 00:50:13,690
What do you mean what?
I had to navigate a transaction,

727
00:50:13,723 --> 00:50:15,357
currency, goods and barter.

728
00:50:15,390 --> 00:50:16,926
I might as well
have had a young girl,

729
00:50:16,959 --> 00:50:18,995
- and a sack of beef or...
- How much for the little girl?

730
00:50:19,028 --> 00:50:21,931
Well, as you can see, she's got
strong haunches, and she comes

731
00:50:21,964 --> 00:50:23,900
from a long line
of very dedicated...

732
00:50:23,933 --> 00:50:26,334
But she's burned,
see, she's burned,

733
00:50:26,368 --> 00:50:27,804
she's burned here,
she's burned here,

734
00:50:27,837 --> 00:50:29,538
by golly, she's burned all over.

735
00:50:29,571 --> 00:50:31,841
She is quite burned.

736
00:50:33,743 --> 00:50:35,812
Bag of Munchos,
can of Schweppes, and...

737
00:50:37,046 --> 00:50:38,715
a Yoo-Hoo for my weary friend.

738
00:50:47,289 --> 00:50:48,356
Deal.

739
00:50:48,390 --> 00:50:49,692
Good day, sir.

740
00:50:51,894 --> 00:50:54,563
- Good day, sir.
- Great, and we're good, good job, guys.

741
00:51:14,483 --> 00:51:16,819
Oh, mother of pearl.

742
00:51:16,853 --> 00:51:18,487
What the fuck are we doing here?

743
00:51:18,520 --> 00:51:19,588
It was his idea.

744
00:51:20,690 --> 00:51:23,726
- Hey, maybe if you just want to come in...
- Nope.

745
00:51:23,760 --> 00:51:26,328
- Alright, will somebody please tell me...
- Sebba,

746
00:51:26,361 --> 00:51:27,662
we're going
to chop some wood, okay?

747
00:51:27,697 --> 00:51:29,598
- You don't have to help.
- Chopping wood?

748
00:51:29,631 --> 00:51:32,567
We were at a banging party,
I was getting a hand job.

749
00:51:32,601 --> 00:51:33,936
So this should be a breeze.

750
00:51:35,437 --> 00:51:36,671
Are you going back to the party?

751
00:51:37,572 --> 00:51:39,809
I don't know, I just
know I'm not staying here.

752
00:51:39,842 --> 00:51:41,276
Well, I want to go.

753
00:51:44,747 --> 00:51:45,647
Fuck!

754
00:51:49,651 --> 00:51:51,419
God speed, love you.

755
00:51:58,795 --> 00:51:59,829
Hi, honey.

756
00:52:00,763 --> 00:52:01,898
Hi, Mom.

757
00:52:03,065 --> 00:52:05,433
- Hey, boys.
- Hi, Mrs. Woodman.

758
00:52:08,938 --> 00:52:11,473
- Is it still Mrs. Woodman?
- Well, it is tonight.

759
00:52:11,506 --> 00:52:13,009
Okay.

760
00:52:16,545 --> 00:52:17,445
Ow.

761
00:52:20,549 --> 00:52:22,651
- Whose pants are those?
- I don't know.

762
00:52:23,920 --> 00:52:27,522
Hey, please,
I am totally spaced to chop that wood,

763
00:52:27,556 --> 00:52:28,691
so we're going to.

764
00:52:28,724 --> 00:52:30,425
A month ago?

765
00:52:30,458 --> 00:52:32,494
- That was in winter.
- I know.

766
00:52:34,130 --> 00:52:36,598
- I was such a shit head.
- You guys can come in.

767
00:52:37,767 --> 00:52:40,937
No, we're going
to chop that wood,

768
00:52:40,970 --> 00:52:43,405
- and then be on our way.
- You guys are, you know,

769
00:52:43,438 --> 00:52:45,407
more than welcome to stay here.

770
00:52:45,440 --> 00:52:48,711
- Um, we're going to...
- Obviously, always.

771
00:52:48,744 --> 00:52:51,714
Chop the wood, and then
probably walk back to dad's.

772
00:52:53,082 --> 00:52:53,983
Kevin?

773
00:52:54,884 --> 00:52:55,785
Yes?

774
00:52:57,687 --> 00:52:58,688
Kevin?

775
00:52:59,922 --> 00:53:00,823
What?

776
00:53:13,668 --> 00:53:14,804
Oh, sick.

777
00:53:16,038 --> 00:53:18,473
- She knows.
- No, she doesn't, chill.

778
00:53:18,506 --> 00:53:19,942
- I'm not chill.
- I'm chill.

779
00:53:19,976 --> 00:53:21,110
Well, that doesn't help
my being not chill.

780
00:53:21,143 --> 00:53:22,644
You're chill.

781
00:53:22,677 --> 00:53:23,846
Oh, fuck.

782
00:54:18,533 --> 00:54:20,836
- Hello? Hey.
- Hi.

783
00:54:20,870 --> 00:54:24,006
So, the boys are here.

784
00:54:24,040 --> 00:54:27,910
- Oh, oh.
- They wanted to chop wood, which Kevin forgot to do...

785
00:54:27,944 --> 00:54:29,845
- That's great.
- ...a month ago.

786
00:54:30,913 --> 00:54:33,548
Yeah, well, they were
at your place earlier,

787
00:54:33,581 --> 00:54:35,517
- and, you know...
- I dropped them at Michael...

788
00:54:35,550 --> 00:54:37,086
Kontz's senior party.

789
00:54:37,119 --> 00:54:39,155
- Yes.
- Whatever they're doing at your condo...

790
00:54:39,188 --> 00:54:41,556
Condo, what? Why do you
have to say condo like that?

791
00:54:41,589 --> 00:54:43,693
- I don't appreciate...
- You're living in the goddamn house.

792
00:54:45,094 --> 00:54:47,029
Well, whatever they're doing,
whatever they've been doing...

793
00:54:47,063 --> 00:54:49,265
Why are you talking like that?

794
00:54:49,298 --> 00:54:51,566
- But I know they're not just...
- Like it's goddamn Fast Times over here.

795
00:54:51,599 --> 00:54:53,703
Because last time I checked,
pot and manual labor...

796
00:54:53,736 --> 00:54:55,004
I don't know what else
they could've been doing,

797
00:54:55,037 --> 00:54:56,538
maybe they're
on those Red Bulls,

798
00:54:56,571 --> 00:54:57,807
- I don't know.
- They're on something.

799
00:54:57,840 --> 00:54:58,774
Well, they weren't
doing it here.

800
00:54:58,808 --> 00:55:00,642
Fine, I'll call Cindy.

801
00:55:00,675 --> 00:55:03,279
Charlie Warner, he's the best
quarterback in New York.

802
00:55:03,312 --> 00:55:05,547
Well, we're not leaving
until Briggs chops one.

803
00:55:05,580 --> 00:55:07,683
- Fuck that!
- Don't be a pussy.

804
00:55:07,717 --> 00:55:10,552
- But I am, why are you being a jerk?
- Just chop one!

805
00:55:10,585 --> 00:55:12,888
- No, seriously, dude, you're being a dick.
- I just want to see.

806
00:55:12,922 --> 00:55:13,990
- Fuck you!
- Hey.

807
00:55:30,773 --> 00:55:32,842
Fuck, he's just bad,
he's just bad.

808
00:55:33,876 --> 00:55:34,877
All right.

809
00:55:47,990 --> 00:55:49,657
Hello.

810
00:55:50,793 --> 00:55:52,627
I think they're on mushrooms.

811
00:55:52,660 --> 00:55:53,896
Mushrooms?

812
00:55:53,929 --> 00:55:55,297
- Yes.
- <i>Mushrooms? You think?</i>

813
00:55:55,331 --> 00:55:56,732
- What?
- They're on...

814
00:55:56,766 --> 00:55:57,665
- <i>No, I know.</i>
- ...mushrooms?

815
00:55:57,700 --> 00:55:58,734
I don't know, dumb-asses

816
00:55:58,768 --> 00:56:00,136
left one behind in Kevin's room.

817
00:56:00,169 --> 00:56:02,670
How did they get? They're 16.

818
00:56:02,705 --> 00:56:04,606
What do you just have mushrooms
lying around the condo?

819
00:56:04,639 --> 00:56:05,908
Would you shut up, please?

820
00:56:10,913 --> 00:56:14,582
I don't know, when I dropped
them off, it... something was...

821
00:56:15,785 --> 00:56:18,653
So I came back, and poked around
Kevin's room, and found it,

822
00:56:18,687 --> 00:56:20,356
I mean, I don't even know,
I haven't seen these things

823
00:56:20,389 --> 00:56:21,724
- in 20 years.
- Oh, please.

824
00:56:24,960 --> 00:56:27,229
Uh, I'm upset too.

825
00:56:27,263 --> 00:56:28,164
<i>It's...</i>

826
00:56:30,299 --> 00:56:32,001
I'm upset.

827
00:56:32,034 --> 00:56:33,035
I'm going to strangle them.

828
00:56:34,737 --> 00:56:38,741
One hundred and ten percent, but before we
strangle, let's just maybe take a breath.

829
00:56:38,774 --> 00:56:40,810
- Take a breath?
- <i>Yeah.</i>

830
00:56:40,843 --> 00:56:41,877
They're safe.

831
00:56:42,978 --> 00:56:44,313
Are they really chopping?

832
00:56:46,315 --> 00:56:48,150
It's just...

833
00:56:49,118 --> 00:56:52,221
they are safe,
let's let them ride this out,

834
00:56:52,254 --> 00:56:53,856
<i>and we'll drop
the gauntlet tomorrow.</i>

835
00:56:53,889 --> 00:56:55,791
Oh, of course,
you want to be the cool dad.

836
00:56:55,825 --> 00:56:57,760
No, they're just tripping,
and I don't see

837
00:56:57,793 --> 00:56:59,095
- <i>anything...</i>
- You want to be buddies with them.

838
00:57:04,066 --> 00:57:05,734
Do you remember the last
time you ate mushrooms?

839
00:57:05,768 --> 00:57:07,403
- No!
- I do.

840
00:57:07,436 --> 00:57:09,205
- And what does that have to do with...
- My mom was

841
00:57:09,238 --> 00:57:10,940
watching Em for the first time,

842
00:57:10,973 --> 00:57:12,141
and we went up
to the North East...

843
00:57:24,286 --> 00:57:28,023
Yeah, so, what
do you propose, Lar?

844
00:57:28,057 --> 00:57:30,625
I don't know,
now I feel like I'm tripping.

845
00:57:33,195 --> 00:57:34,330
Okay.

846
00:57:36,365 --> 00:57:38,868
Well, should I
make them some food?

847
00:57:38,901 --> 00:57:40,903
- Do they get hungry?
- <i>I don't know, you know, maybe</i>

848
00:57:40,936 --> 00:57:42,171
give them some fruit,

849
00:57:42,204 --> 00:57:44,206
and put on <i>Europe '72,</i>

850
00:57:44,240 --> 00:57:46,142
- you have all my records, so.
- Don't.

851
00:57:48,811 --> 00:57:50,446
- Axe!
- Yeah, I was going to say.

852
00:57:50,479 --> 00:57:52,114
- Say what?
- The axe thing.

853
00:57:52,148 --> 00:57:54,416
- Well, why didn't you?
- I was scared.

854
00:57:54,450 --> 00:57:57,686
Shit, they're gone.

855
00:58:01,824 --> 00:58:02,958
I got to piss.

856
00:58:09,298 --> 00:58:10,199
So sick!

857
00:58:11,300 --> 00:58:13,035
Man, Hartford '96?

858
00:58:14,236 --> 00:58:17,439
- Good ear.
- God, that was my first show.

859
00:58:21,877 --> 00:58:24,346
The first time they
ever encored with Monkey

860
00:58:24,380 --> 00:58:25,881
- and the Merry Go Round.
- You're kidding me.

861
00:58:25,915 --> 00:58:27,883
But it was Monkey
on a Merry Go Round

862
00:58:27,917 --> 00:58:29,418
into Spaghetti Spaghetti.

863
00:58:29,451 --> 00:58:32,021
Shoot me in the dick.

864
00:58:41,530 --> 00:58:44,433
Eyes of the world,
put those away, kid.

865
00:58:47,536 --> 00:58:48,470
I'm kidding.

866
00:58:56,011 --> 00:58:57,012
What are you going to do?

867
00:58:58,147 --> 00:58:59,048
I don't know.

868
00:59:01,984 --> 00:59:03,319
Get a Gatorade.

869
00:59:03,352 --> 00:59:04,253
Really?

870
00:59:05,888 --> 00:59:07,423
Yeah.

871
00:59:07,456 --> 00:59:09,458
Well, what flavor?

872
00:59:09,491 --> 00:59:12,995
I'd stay away from the Frosts,
you know, the blends.

873
00:59:13,028 --> 00:59:14,730
Uh, how about just red?

874
00:59:22,204 --> 00:59:24,373
- What are you going to do?
- Green bottles.

875
00:59:29,912 --> 00:59:31,080
It's going to be all right.

876
00:59:32,114 --> 00:59:33,048
Really?

877
00:59:36,085 --> 00:59:39,421
No, but, you know,
it's too late to stop now.

878
01:00:01,410 --> 01:00:04,046
- What the hell are you knocking for?
- What?

879
01:00:06,181 --> 01:00:07,483
The cops knock.

880
01:00:07,516 --> 01:00:09,285
- The cops called?
- No, I'm just saying.

881
01:00:09,318 --> 01:00:11,387
- Well, I couldn't find them.
- They'll be here.

882
01:00:11,420 --> 01:00:13,122
What makes you so sure?

883
01:00:13,155 --> 01:00:14,556
They could
be driving to Timbuktu,

884
01:00:14,590 --> 01:00:16,458
or, you know, God forbid,
playing with an axe.

885
01:00:16,492 --> 01:00:18,394
Timbuktu?

886
01:00:18,427 --> 01:00:21,897
Listen, I think the axe
portion of the evening is over,

887
01:00:21,930 --> 01:00:23,899
for whatever reason,
I think hallucinogens

888
01:00:23,932 --> 01:00:25,801
may bring Briggs
closer to normal.

889
01:00:26,568 --> 01:00:27,803
They'll come home.

890
01:00:29,471 --> 01:00:31,473
- Is this loud enough?
- What?

891
01:00:36,645 --> 01:00:39,348
Do you want a beer?
I don't think I have any wine.

892
01:00:39,381 --> 01:00:41,216
- Great.
- What?

893
01:00:41,250 --> 01:00:43,052
Sure, I'll have whatever.

894
01:00:43,085 --> 01:00:44,953
Let's see.

895
01:00:44,987 --> 01:00:46,355
All this goddamn champagne.

896
01:01:05,140 --> 01:01:07,109
I have this champagne, actually.

897
01:01:08,210 --> 01:01:09,945
For what?

898
01:01:09,978 --> 01:01:12,247
I don't know, it's just here.

899
01:01:12,281 --> 01:01:13,982
Were you expecting company?

900
01:01:15,384 --> 01:01:17,119
Do you want some champagne, Liz?

901
01:01:17,152 --> 01:01:20,322
Sure, might as well toast
our kid to the psych ward.

902
01:01:20,356 --> 01:01:21,557
- What?
- Sure!

903
01:01:22,692 --> 01:01:26,195
Probably the greatest
song of all time.

904
01:01:27,930 --> 01:01:30,165
Such a weird night.

905
01:01:30,199 --> 01:01:33,202
What a weird life.

906
01:01:35,537 --> 01:01:37,339
Hey, Briggs,
when's the last time

907
01:01:37,373 --> 01:01:38,974
you even hooked up with a girl?

908
01:01:41,477 --> 01:01:43,045
Guess that's a sore subject.

909
01:01:44,446 --> 01:01:46,348
- Briggs!
- He's fine.

910
01:01:53,021 --> 01:01:53,922
Fuck me.

911
01:02:00,562 --> 01:02:02,064
Man.

912
01:02:02,097 --> 01:02:04,099
Jesus fuck.

913
01:02:04,133 --> 01:02:06,602
What the... every fucking time.

914
01:02:09,338 --> 01:02:10,239
Whoa.

915
01:02:13,743 --> 01:02:15,511
I haven't had a glass
of water in, like...

916
01:02:16,746 --> 01:02:17,913
two weeks.

917
01:02:22,317 --> 01:02:24,486
That was not chill.

918
01:02:26,723 --> 01:02:28,290
I'm chill.

919
01:02:38,367 --> 01:02:40,102
Lar, the bathroom is disgusting.

920
01:02:40,135 --> 01:02:41,470
Excuse me?

921
01:02:41,503 --> 01:02:43,405
- It is.
- Oh, go jump. The bathroom's...

922
01:02:43,439 --> 01:02:44,741
If you're going to
have our daughter living...

923
01:02:44,774 --> 01:02:46,108
- Did I leave the toilet seat up?
- It is.

924
01:02:46,141 --> 01:02:47,176
Sorry.

925
01:02:47,209 --> 01:02:48,444
But I cleaned it yesterday,

926
01:02:48,477 --> 01:02:49,611
and I don't have to
explain myself...

927
01:02:51,113 --> 01:02:54,283
Have her living here... you guys have
your own thing to figure out, okay?

928
01:02:56,686 --> 01:03:00,088
I mean, maybe for just once,
you could be on my team.

929
01:03:02,491 --> 01:03:04,159
You kind of broke
up the team, Liz.

930
01:03:06,395 --> 01:03:07,362
Don't make it simple.

931
01:03:36,058 --> 01:03:37,092
What a great year.

932
01:03:47,336 --> 01:03:48,237
That's nice.

933
01:03:52,474 --> 01:03:54,109
This part's weird.

934
01:03:54,142 --> 01:03:56,512
This part of the mushroom?

935
01:03:57,579 --> 01:04:00,349
No, this part of being a parent.

936
01:04:00,382 --> 01:04:01,250
Yeah.

937
01:04:02,685 --> 01:04:04,620
It's not like you
can just march him back

938
01:04:04,653 --> 01:04:07,155
to the hardware store,
and make him return it,

939
01:04:07,189 --> 01:04:08,725
and apologize.

940
01:04:10,292 --> 01:04:12,060
What he... what did
he steal again?

941
01:04:12,094 --> 01:04:16,398
It was a magnet that was
shaped like a cartoon corn.

942
01:04:16,431 --> 01:04:18,100
Right.

943
01:04:18,133 --> 01:04:20,302
That's why he's
so afraid of cartoon corn.

944
01:04:23,238 --> 01:04:26,341
In the heart of the belly of the
lion's den, and you just bounced.

945
01:04:26,375 --> 01:04:28,377
And I would do it again.

946
01:04:28,410 --> 01:04:30,245
- You'd be terrible in war.
- Yeah,

947
01:04:30,279 --> 01:04:31,547
I'd like to think
I'd be the worst.

948
01:04:31,580 --> 01:04:32,849
There should be
a medal for that.

949
01:04:32,882 --> 01:04:34,349
Pussy heart.

950
01:04:35,718 --> 01:04:38,721
Sir, I mean, it's right
there on his uniform,

951
01:04:38,755 --> 01:04:40,757
four pussy hearts,
and his two...

952
01:04:42,624 --> 01:04:46,295
what do you, what do you call
a soldier's time at war?

953
01:04:47,629 --> 01:04:48,765
- Tour.
- Tour.

954
01:04:53,402 --> 01:04:55,404
- Sir.
- Sir.

955
01:04:57,205 --> 01:04:58,173
Look at me.

956
01:04:59,441 --> 01:05:00,342
Guys.

957
01:05:05,447 --> 01:05:06,381
Give me some.

958
01:05:17,259 --> 01:05:20,462
So shy, it's a good deed,
in a weird world.

959
01:05:26,335 --> 01:05:28,403
You forget to
taste things sometimes...

960
01:05:30,439 --> 01:05:31,473
or something.

961
01:05:33,743 --> 01:05:35,544
What?

962
01:05:35,577 --> 01:05:37,379
You guys fucking
making fun of me again?

963
01:05:41,784 --> 01:05:42,685
No.

964
01:05:52,929 --> 01:05:53,863
Kev?

965
01:06:00,569 --> 01:06:01,637
Did we screw up?

966
01:06:04,707 --> 01:06:05,775
I mean...

967
01:06:08,310 --> 01:06:10,445
on paper? I don't know.

968
01:06:11,681 --> 01:06:16,251
Having three 16-year-olds
on hallucinogens in the basement

969
01:06:16,284 --> 01:06:18,955
of a divorced condo
with unsanitary bathrooms.

970
01:06:18,988 --> 01:06:20,622
I never said unsanitary.

971
01:06:20,656 --> 01:06:23,425
Disgusting is much prettier.

972
01:06:30,632 --> 01:06:31,566
Did we?

973
01:06:34,269 --> 01:06:35,170
Elizabeth.

974
01:06:37,774 --> 01:06:42,210
I... I'm, you know, so...

975
01:06:43,578 --> 01:06:44,947
confused, and...

976
01:06:47,416 --> 01:06:48,951
sad,

977
01:06:48,985 --> 01:06:54,623
about us, about... I,
I don't know how anything works.

978
01:06:57,559 --> 01:06:58,460
Did we screw up?

979
01:07:00,529 --> 01:07:02,364
Yeah, probably.

980
01:07:04,633 --> 01:07:05,634
But...

981
01:07:08,004 --> 01:07:10,305
we made two of my top ten
favorite people in the world.

982
01:07:20,983 --> 01:07:21,784
I love her.

983
01:07:22,952 --> 01:07:24,854
Dude, you're, like,
in love with her.

984
01:07:24,887 --> 01:07:26,455
Yeah, that's what I just said,

985
01:07:26,488 --> 01:07:28,423
and I will scream
it from the rooftops.

986
01:07:28,457 --> 01:07:29,391
Dude, that's your sister.

987
01:07:30,559 --> 01:07:32,294
The heart wants
what the heart wants.

988
01:07:36,465 --> 01:07:37,365
I don't know.

989
01:07:42,304 --> 01:07:43,005
My mom's here though.

990
01:07:43,940 --> 01:07:46,608
- What?
- Don't be sketch.

991
01:07:46,641 --> 01:07:49,912
I'm not,
it's just I know it,

992
01:07:49,946 --> 01:07:51,781
because this is how it goes.

993
01:07:51,814 --> 01:07:53,615
What do, what do...
are we going to be in trouble?

994
01:07:54,684 --> 01:07:56,886
What, wait, how is she here?

995
01:07:56,919 --> 01:07:58,386
This is Larry's house,
why is she here?

996
01:07:58,420 --> 01:07:59,689
I don't know, Sebba.

997
01:08:00,622 --> 01:08:02,725
- What can you do though?
- Fucking bounce.

998
01:08:04,026 --> 01:08:05,695
Are we, are we fucked?

999
01:08:05,728 --> 01:08:07,295
No, we're not...

1000
01:08:08,396 --> 01:08:10,499
- we're not fucked.
- But what are we going to do?

1001
01:08:12,501 --> 01:08:14,536
There's nothing much
we can do...

1002
01:08:15,670 --> 01:08:16,906
time's almost up...

1003
01:08:19,909 --> 01:08:21,343
best we try to enjoy it.

1004
01:08:25,014 --> 01:08:28,383
<i>♪ So much here
has happened to me ♪</i>

1005
01:08:29,719 --> 01:08:32,054
<i>♪ And I don't understand ♪</i>

1006
01:10:00,843 --> 01:10:05,081
<i>♪ I can't sing
the blues anymore ♪</i>

1007
01:10:05,114 --> 01:10:07,917
<i>♪ But I can sing this song ♪</i>

1008
01:10:07,950 --> 01:10:12,654
<i>♪ And you can sing
this song when I'm gone ♪</i>

1009
01:10:13,723 --> 01:10:14,623
<i>Look at me.</i>

1010
01:10:15,624 --> 01:10:17,827
Oh, my God!

1011
01:10:19,594 --> 01:10:21,764
Wait, what are you crying for?

1012
01:10:21,797 --> 01:10:25,533
Keep your shit together,
that's like the biggest party foul ever.

1013
01:10:28,237 --> 01:10:29,604
Well, this can't be good.

1014
01:10:31,974 --> 01:10:33,809
The boys are in trouble.

1015
01:10:33,843 --> 01:10:35,211
This doesn't feel like trouble.

1016
01:10:35,244 --> 01:10:36,645
It will tomorrow.

1017
01:10:40,149 --> 01:10:41,183
Hi, Mom.

1018
01:10:48,623 --> 01:10:49,658
Hi.

1019
01:10:50,592 --> 01:10:52,460
Okay, okay.

1020
01:10:53,696 --> 01:10:59,501
<i>♪ Sometimes it's bombs
between daughters and moms ♪</i>

1021
01:11:00,903 --> 01:11:04,140
What? It's Thick
and Thin, it's happy.

1022
01:11:45,848 --> 01:11:48,516
Oh, fuck, I'm going
to get a cold sore.

1023
01:11:48,550 --> 01:11:50,252
Briggs, get up here!

1024
01:11:52,755 --> 01:11:54,056
Now!

1025
01:11:54,090 --> 01:11:55,925
Fuck that.

1026
01:11:55,958 --> 01:11:57,559
- Fuck.
- I don't know.

1027
01:11:57,592 --> 01:11:58,961
- Why me?
- Go see.

1028
01:11:58,995 --> 01:12:00,963
- Come with me.
- He said Briggs.

1029
01:12:00,997 --> 01:12:03,132
- He's your dad!
- But he didn't say me.

1030
01:12:04,300 --> 01:12:05,533
Fuck!

1031
01:12:06,302 --> 01:12:07,502
Lar?

1032
01:12:11,240 --> 01:12:13,075
Andrew, hi.

1033
01:12:13,109 --> 01:12:16,245
Liz, hi.

1034
01:12:16,278 --> 01:12:19,614
You still like
Schweppes, right, honey?

1035
01:12:20,716 --> 01:12:21,784
Yes.

1036
01:12:29,091 --> 01:12:30,993
Mm.

1037
01:12:31,027 --> 01:12:33,262
So what are you guys doing down there?

1038
01:12:33,295 --> 01:12:34,263
Um.

1039
01:12:36,899 --> 01:12:40,002
Sebba left, it's just Kev and I.

1040
01:12:40,036 --> 01:12:41,971
You guys want to
come up and join us?

1041
01:12:46,142 --> 01:12:47,777
- Yeah.
- Mm-hmm.

1042
01:12:51,013 --> 01:12:52,748
- I'll get him.
- Okay.

1043
01:13:01,223 --> 01:13:02,691
What the hell is that?

1044
01:13:04,293 --> 01:13:05,327
Schweppes.

1045
01:13:05,361 --> 01:13:07,063
Yeah, I can see that.

1046
01:13:07,096 --> 01:13:08,731
- And your mom's here.
- What?

1047
01:13:08,764 --> 01:13:10,099
And there's an Atticus Finch
on the counter.

1048
01:13:10,132 --> 01:13:12,600
Oh, fuck me. Also, fuck you!

1049
01:13:12,634 --> 01:13:15,271
- What?
- I know who Gregory Beck is, fucking Dobleman twins,

1050
01:13:15,304 --> 01:13:17,373
- don't compare me to Baby Ty Donie.
- Not the time,

1051
01:13:17,406 --> 01:13:19,241
how could you be
thinking about that right now?

1052
01:13:19,275 --> 01:13:20,943
- You are so bizarre.
- Fuck!

1053
01:13:20,976 --> 01:13:22,378
- We're had.
- They're going to send me to rehab

1054
01:13:22,411 --> 01:13:24,046
- in New Hampshire.
- No, they're not, wait,

1055
01:13:24,080 --> 01:13:24,980
why New Hampshire?

1056
01:13:26,949 --> 01:13:28,616
Em's up there,
we got to go deal.

1057
01:13:30,386 --> 01:13:32,788
Oh, dude.

1058
01:13:32,822 --> 01:13:33,856
We got to deal!

1059
01:13:35,825 --> 01:13:37,960
Whatever you do,
avoid the counter.

1060
01:13:37,993 --> 01:13:41,629
- Hey, I'm sorry about what...
- Don't...

1061
01:13:42,965 --> 01:13:44,300
ever apologize for that.

1062
01:13:50,406 --> 01:13:53,042
Well, when it's not scary...

1063
01:13:54,910 --> 01:13:55,911
it's fun.

1064
01:14:06,722 --> 01:14:07,990
It's been a long
night for you fellows,

1065
01:14:08,023 --> 01:14:09,892
you must be hungry, eggy weggs?

1066
01:14:11,427 --> 01:14:15,731
And, uh, how was the party,
what did you find out there?

1067
01:14:15,764 --> 01:14:18,067
Eggy weggs, weggs,
weggs, Briggs, weggs, yes?

1068
01:14:18,100 --> 01:14:23,372
Eggy weggs, yes, can I have
another Schweppes? Tastes amazing.

1069
01:14:23,405 --> 01:14:26,242
You guys want
some home fries too?

1070
01:14:26,275 --> 01:14:27,642
Sure.

1071
01:14:28,377 --> 01:14:29,378
What did you learn?

1072
01:14:30,746 --> 01:14:31,780
What are you talking about?

1073
01:14:33,449 --> 01:14:35,251
On your vision quest.

1074
01:14:40,956 --> 01:14:42,091
Too late to stop now.

1075
01:14:44,493 --> 01:14:45,861
What was that, bucko?

1076
01:14:49,131 --> 01:14:50,665
It's too late to stop now.

1077
01:14:55,437 --> 01:14:58,073
Dan the man, dammit.

1078
01:14:58,107 --> 01:14:59,842
Lar, can I talk
to you for a second?

1079
01:14:59,875 --> 01:15:01,410
- Sure.
- In the other room.

1080
01:15:01,443 --> 01:15:02,344
Oh.

1081
01:15:06,115 --> 01:15:09,351
- Let's not make this into a cool thing, okay?
- I'm not.

1082
01:15:09,385 --> 01:15:10,286
Vision quest?

1083
01:15:11,520 --> 01:15:13,389
Let's be parents here, okay?

1084
01:15:13,422 --> 01:15:15,057
We are being parents,
I thought you said

1085
01:15:15,090 --> 01:15:16,225
we were going to mess with them.

1086
01:15:16,258 --> 01:15:17,359
Well, I changed my mind.

1087
01:15:18,394 --> 01:15:20,362
- As you do.
- What?

1088
01:15:20,396 --> 01:15:22,831
You have a penchant
for changing your mind.

1089
01:15:22,865 --> 01:15:24,400
- Oh, go chill.
- You go chill.

1090
01:15:24,433 --> 01:15:26,001
- You go chill.
- You go chill.

1091
01:15:26,902 --> 01:15:28,170
Leave no trace, knuckleheads.

1092
01:15:29,405 --> 01:15:31,106
Would you just grow up?

1093
01:15:31,140 --> 01:15:32,241
What does that even mean?

1094
01:15:32,274 --> 01:15:33,842
It means...

1095
01:15:33,876 --> 01:15:35,978
Just cut it out with
the eggy wegg thing.

1096
01:15:36,011 --> 01:15:37,179
I had two kids
when I was 30 years old,

1097
01:15:37,213 --> 01:15:38,714
and it's <i>Clockwork Orange.</i>

1098
01:15:41,817 --> 01:15:43,752
- Go jump.
- You go jump.

1099
01:15:43,786 --> 01:15:45,421
Watch these idiots jump.

1100
01:15:45,454 --> 01:15:47,156
<i>♪ Hey, fools ♪</i>

1101
01:15:48,224 --> 01:15:50,426
<i>♪ Hey, what are you doing
back in town? ♪</i>

1102
01:15:52,528 --> 01:15:55,364
<i>♪ Man, I don't even know
what city I was in ♪</i>

1103
01:15:59,969 --> 01:16:02,271
- What the hell?
- Oh, I spilled the plant.

1104
01:16:08,110 --> 01:16:10,145
<i>♪ Let's cook them on something ♪</i>

1105
01:16:10,179 --> 01:16:12,314
<i>♪ There ain't nothing
I would do ♪</i>

1106
01:16:13,449 --> 01:16:15,117
<i>♪ The fine steaks on Sunday ♪</i>

1107
01:16:15,150 --> 01:16:16,785
Larry, you the next one?

1108
01:16:19,221 --> 01:16:20,155
Don't call me Larry.

1109
01:16:21,390 --> 01:16:24,226
- Patrick 2719.
- Saucy.

1110
01:16:24,260 --> 01:16:26,562
<i>♪ Stick it in the back
to do themselves ♪</i>

1111
01:16:26,595 --> 01:16:28,797
<i>♪ A fever, a moonlight fancy ♪</i>

1112
01:16:28,831 --> 01:16:31,367
<i>♪ Do you got now
the next joint ♪</i>

1113
01:16:34,069 --> 01:16:35,504
That was a hollow log.

1114
01:16:37,940 --> 01:16:40,075
I feel like
the oldest baby in space.

1115
01:16:40,109 --> 01:16:41,877
<i>♪ Pick it up on the next turn ♪</i>

1116
01:16:41,910 --> 01:16:45,281
<i>♪ Out of the car
no rhythm you ♪</i>

1117
01:16:45,314 --> 01:16:48,150
<i>♪ I won't let one of my boys ♪</i>

1118
01:16:48,183 --> 01:16:50,152
<i>♪ Sit back and let them do ♪</i>

1119
01:16:52,087 --> 01:16:55,124
<i>♪ Baby, the stacks outside ♪</i>

1120
01:16:55,157 --> 01:16:57,092
<i>♪ Because I like the cable guy ♪</i>

1121
01:16:57,126 --> 01:16:58,594
<i>♪ Memphis for gas ♪</i>

1122
01:16:58,627 --> 01:17:00,529
<i>♪ Ready to go from ♪</i>

1123
01:17:00,562 --> 01:17:03,399
<i>♪ Do you like it
do you like it like that? ♪</i>

1124
01:17:03,432 --> 01:17:04,566
Light years.

1125
01:17:05,735 --> 01:17:08,804
<i>♪ Do you like
wrapping the fence scale ♪</i>

1126
01:18:04,093 --> 01:18:07,196
<i>♪ Lay this down, it's been
a pleasure being here ♪</i>

1127
01:18:07,229 --> 01:18:08,931
<i>♪ In your wonderful cities ♪</i>

1128
01:19:15,030 --> 01:19:16,565
<i>You have no idea.</i>

1129
01:19:23,238 --> 01:19:26,008
<i>♪ Sometimes I just
feel it coming ♪</i>

1130
01:19:27,142 --> 01:19:29,344
<i>♪ Stacking, baking
take him please ♪</i>

1131
01:19:29,407 --> 01:19:31,251
Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org

1132
01:19:31,313 --> 01:19:33,348
<i>♪ Pick you up in the morning ♪</i>

1133
01:19:34,483 --> 01:19:37,052
<i>♪ New road below my feet ♪</i>

1134
01:19:39,221 --> 01:19:40,989
<i>♪ Dead end belly ♪</i>

1135
01:19:42,759 --> 01:19:44,660
<i>♪ Digging a road ♪</i>

1136
01:19:46,595 --> 01:19:48,564
<i>♪ You need medicine ♪</i>

1137
01:19:49,732 --> 01:19:53,268
<i>♪ Leave me alone ♪</i>

1138
01:19:55,404 --> 01:19:57,439
<i>♪ Pick you up in the morning ♪</i>

1139
01:19:58,607 --> 01:20:00,743
<i>♪ Stand before me like a tree ♪</i>

1140
01:20:03,312 --> 01:20:04,980
<i>♪ Double the ending ♪</i>

1141
01:20:06,281 --> 01:20:08,650
<i>♪ Whatever I can be ♪</i>

1142
01:20:10,619 --> 01:20:12,421
<i>♪ Hollow body ♪</i>

1143
01:20:14,223 --> 01:20:16,325
<i>♪ Microphone stand ♪</i>

1144
01:20:17,827 --> 01:20:20,095
<i>♪ Chevy and sweatshirt ♪</i>

1145
01:20:21,363 --> 01:20:24,466
<i>♪ Joining the band ♪</i>

1146
01:20:31,573 --> 01:20:36,813
<i>♪ Out beyond where
the churches are built ♪</i>

1147
01:20:36,846 --> 01:20:41,583
<i>♪ There lives a girl
racked with sorrow and guilt ♪</i>

1148
01:20:42,618 --> 01:20:48,624
<i>♪ And she is pining for me ♪</i>

1149
01:20:53,796 --> 01:20:58,467
<i>♪ But she is crazy ♪</i>