HUMAN RIGHTS COMMISION REPORT ON RON'S ANUS
(updated on 1/13/2010)
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ron’s mom went to bail ron’s anus out of jail because she heard it was busted

Ron’s anus took up drinking as a coping mechanism for its PTSD.

If ron’s anus was a galaxy it’d be the IC 1101.

Ron’s anus farts out SOS in morse code.

Ron once farted near an open flame. He became the first humanoid hot air balloon to circle the globe.

Ron’s anus has lost all elasticity. Neighborhood children use his colon as a jumprope.

some of you probably heard that kids were using ron’s anus for a jump rope.  now it’s gotten to the point where they can double dutch if they fold it in half

ron’s anus is so prolapsed, when he went to the amusement park, some parents wanted to have their kid in a picture with him thinking he was the pink panther

Ron’s anus is often used to pull large water vessels into harbor when tugboats are temporarily out of commission.

NASA hires out ron’s colon as a wind tunnel to test their shuttles.

Ron’s anus mistakenly won the Guiness Book of World Record’s record for the largest pile of bubblegum.

Kids coming home from school take the long way to avoid ron’s anus. One time a kid was dared to walk up to it and scream hello, which he did and the echo scram back “ron is gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay”.

Indiana Jones once used Rons’ anus to escape a crashing plane to safety by riding it down a mountainside.

When ron’s anus goes to bars it tells chicks it’s a lifesaver.

Google employees had to photoshop ron’s anus out of google maps.

Ron’s anus lost the bid to host the 2014 olympics because of an anus rights violation scandal.

Ron’s anus was employed as a hideout for Jews during the Nazi occupation of France.

Most people sneak candy into the movies. Ron sneaks people. In his anus.

looking at ron’s anus once induced a flashback in a My Lai Massacre survivor.

Ron was in the movie “Operation Dumbo Drop”. His anus played the part of the parachute.

Lovecraft was too scared to fall asleep for 2 months after getting a vision of ron’s anus in a dream.

Ron’s anus has a livejournal where it posts whiny poetry about how hard its life is and asks god ‘why’.

Ron’s anus is the new Odum’s hair/wife/BMI. Only Ron’s anus was never paid $800 to leave him.

If ron’s anus had a tollbooth, ron would be in the forbes top 10.

Ron’s anus is like a sinkhole, it swallows everything but unlike a sinkhole it has a strong preference for penises.

South american drug lords have huge wars over who gets to use ron as their drug mule.

Ron’s anus has a game room and a 9 foot deep swimming pool.

In a past life, Ron’s anus was used as a stop on the Underground Railroad.

Ron rents his anus out as a water slide for kids parties.

When puzzled what to do with all the run-off oil from the BP catastrophe, engineers chose Ron’s anus as a temporary depository.

Ron’s anus has twice the circumference of Taco’s neck.

I heard Ron’s anus is so stretched out by massive gay dickings that it could encompass Odum’s BMI. Thrice.

Ron’s keys fell into a drain cover but he lowered his prolapsed rectum into it and sucked them back up.

i thought i saw ron wearing a pink scarf but it turned out he had his anus wrapped around his neck so it wouldn’t drag on the ground.

If ron’s anus was a superhero its superpower would be getting stuffed with cock.

Things that will fit into ron’s anus:

    * A microwave
    * A dining room set
    * A dinosaur skeleton (disassembled)
    * A dinosaur skeleton (assembled)
    * A mountain bike
    * A lexus gx470

Ron’s anus had 20000 tonnes of hazardous materials & biological waste dumped into it.  It’s an EPA matter now.

Ron’s anus’s anus is the world’s second largest anus.

Ron’s anus has its own set of physical laws, supreme beings, worlds and galaxies and dark matter. It resembles our universe, except everything is gay in it. The electrons just keep f***ing each other in the butt.

If you ask Sacagawea to be your guide on an exploration of ron’s anus she would tell you to ‘go get raped’.

Ron’s anus was driving in town and got rear-ended by an 18 wheeler but it didn’t notice it.

Ron’s anus gets so abused that its therapist had to get a therapist.

In 2006 ron was abducted by aliens and they lost their anal probe and two good alien scientists somewhere in his anus.

ron’s had so much gay sex that his chakras were permanently pounded out of alignment.  he can’t even do yoga to get them aligned because even if he does, they’re just going drop straight out of his anus.

Jacques Yves Cousteau declared Ron’s anus one of the top ten scuba diving sites in the world.

ron’s butt plug is a huge mountain in the australian outback

the only thing faster than the speed of light is how quick ron’s anus gets filled with cocks

THRICE DAILY, EVERY GAY MAN IN THE WORLD TURNS TOWARDS RONS ANUS AND PRAYS.

ron’s anus is so big, it’s got it’s own weather system

someone was trying 2 get funding from the spanish crown 2 explore ron’s anus + circumnavigate it

Ron says he has to give himself at least one hour every morning to roll up his anus, it’s that loose.

Some activists were saying that aid to africa is a political distraction from the human rights abuses going on in ron’s lower intenstinal tract

Due to his expertise with similar situations, they flew ron’s proctologist to help extract the trapped miners in chile.

the echo in ron’s anus tries to ask people to help it escape

Ron doesn’t use a sleeping bag when he goes camping. He just curls up in his anus. Yes it’s that big, & it’s really soft and warm from the inflammation.

Greenpeace investigators came across the bloody site of what they thought was the largest baby seal slaughter ever but it turned out Ronald had just used the spot to ice down his anus.

Ron’s anus is so ripped, it won a bodybuilding contest.

Polar bears, reptiles, and even a moose have been found in the contents of ron’s anus.