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- My Stuff
- Sultan of Soul
- #nsfw
- Characters: DM
- Created: September 4th at 9:54PM
- Updated: September 4th at 10:09PM
- Actions: 51
- 0
- You are a party of adventurers, summoned to the court of the King Samir, the Sultan of Smooth, ruler of the Land that Grooves. The Land that Grooves is filled with sand, camels, spices, glimmering golden terminates, and the world's finest dancers, who jive to the beat of the land's hoppin' music.
- Samir has grown bored of the kingdom's music, and has been searching his lands for the musician that will play him the best song in the world. The kingdom's prophets foretold that the best song in the world can only be played by magical demon efreets, who inhabit the mystical land of the Dub Steppes, to the north of Samir's Kingdom. In order to capture the efreet, Samir ordered his army to collect the kingdom's finest adventurers and bring them to his court.
- Your party of adventurers stands in front of King Samir, who lazily slouches in his throne in front of the royal entourage. His turban bobs to the tune of a strange song played by the court musician. Suddenly, Samir stops bobbing. With a slight frown, Samir raises his hand. A guard standing behind the musician beheads the court musician. The head rolls to the floor, striking an ominous chord on the late musician's lute.
- "No, that music will not do at all. Not one bit. We need music with SOUL. Yes, you adventurers shall journey forth in a quest capture a magical demon efreet from the Dub Steppe, and bind him to play me the best song in the world!"
- And with a wry smile, he turns to the party of adventurers.The first member of the adventurer party is Susumono, the harlequin rogue. Susumono carries a longsword, a dagger, and a gun.
- The second member of the adventurer party is Johnny, the rogue. Johnny carries a dagger, and a gun.
- The third member of the adventurer party is Duke, the Barbarians. Duke has a greatsword, a greatclub, and a "10 foot long pole". The "10 foot long pole" is Duke's nickname for his penis.
- The fourth and final member of the adventurer party is Buusta, the rogue. Buusta carries two daggers.
- "You there! You look like the leader of this fine group of ragtag adventurers! Tell me, are you ready to capture a demon efreet and force him to play the best song in the world?"
- Duke speaks up. Duke says "We will capture the demon and make it kneel before us as it plays the best song in the world!"
- "Hmm, I'm not sure about you..."
- Duke lets out a yell.
- "WHAT?!"
- Samir, the Sultan of the Land that Grooves, lets out a laugh.
- "Well, I'm glad you're confident! Let's get down to buisness then."
- Your party is introduced to the Royal Barrister, an old man with white hair and a golden mustache.
- Buusta starts conversing with the Royal Barrister, saying "You don't look so old do ya, old man". While the Barrister is distracted Johnny the rogue attempts to pick the Barisster's pockets.
- The Royal Barrister looks around, then he whispers "I'm 7.... 8..... 9... 10... 11.... fuck..."
- The Royal Barrister pulls out a golden pocketwatch and gives it to Johnny.
- "Take this, pretty pleeeeeease?"
- You and your companions are shocked. The Royal Barrister just gave away his most prized possession!
- "Ah what the hell, we have other watches."
- Johnny scuffs in scorn, and throws away the golden pocketwatch. As it careens over Johnny's shoulder, Susumono reaches out and snatches the golden pocketwatch from midair, and pockets it. Johnny looks on in shock, while Susumono grins.
- "Heh." Buusta chuckles.
- "Alright adventurers, let me tell you about the demon efreet..."
- You learn that the demon efreet has been plaguing the region near the city of Arat. The demon stands at 18 hands, and it's fierce red body is topped with a firey head of hair. The demon has been terrorizing the villagers of Arat, demanding virgin blood and unborn children. If the villagers do not give in to this wicked demon's demands, they are killed and their village is burnt down to the ground.
- Duke scoffs and beats his chest. Duke says "18 hands? Pff, I've killed ogres way bigger than that!"
- "Yeah, you're pretty tough..." the barrister says sarcastically.
- The barrister changes his tone to a more serious one and continues "The demon efreet is made of fire, so it will be vulnerable to water and frost attacks."
- "Hey wait!" Johnny says, raising his hand. The Royal Barrister looks at Johnny.
- Johnny says "Wait, I don't have water and frost attacks, I only have this dagger and this gun. How would you say the efreet demon fares against... bullets?"
- The Royal Barrister thinks for a minute, stroking his mustache.
- "Hmm, that's a good question."
- The Royal Barrister looks at Johnny's gun and his eyes light up.
- "I got it!"
- The Royal Barrister says "The demon efreet has 75% fire resistance and 25% physical resistance."
- The Royal Barrister chuckles and takes a puff of his cigar.
- "That oughta even things out a bit!"
- Johnny nods sagely. Buusta butts in and says "Wait a second, where exactly is the city of Arat? How do we get the city? And how much are we getting paid exactly?"
- The Royal Barrister smiles and says "You're getting paid 80 gold coins when you take out the demon efreet. You'll be flown to Arat by airplane, and from there you can take a carriage to the village of Arat. As for how you get back... well that'll be on you!"
- "Whoa whoa whoa, wait. FLOWN in an airplane?"
- The Royal Barrister nods proudly. Johnny whistles in awe.
- Before the party boards the airplane, Susumono asks the Royal Barrister a question. "How long do we have at the village of Aray before the demon efreet shows up again?"
- "You have three days."
- The adventurers board the airplane and settle in. Johnny is sitting in the first seat, right behind the pilot.
- "Hey, do you think you can let me sit up front? I really want to see how this airplane flies!" Susumono asks the flight attendant, who nods. Susumono goes and sits up front.
- After a few minutes of sitting in the airplane, Johnny gets bored.
- While strapped into his seat in the airplane in first class, Duke the barbarian is having a feast with the in-flight refreshments, eating all the food and drinking all the beer.
- Suddenly, the demon efreet makes his move!
- The demon efreet strikes the airplane with a fireball, damaging the wing.
- The airplane begins shaking and out of control!
- Johnny, Susumono and Buusta struggle to buckle in their seatbelts as the plane begins to shake.
- "What's happening?" Buusta screams.
- Johnny looks out the window and sees that they're headed for a mountain! "We're going to hit a mountain!"
- Johnny takes the reins from the pilot in order to steady the airplane. "Don't worry, I have over 5000 hours of flight time logged."
- Johnny steers the airplane away from the mountain, but they're still headed for a field. Suddenly the airplane veers back towards the mountain.
- "Fuck! I'm steering as best I can, but some asshole stole our first officer's seat!" Johnny yells.
- "It was me! I was sitting here!" Buusta yells.
- Buusta yells to the party. "Don't forget our magical parachutes! WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO JUMP!", and with a scream, the party leaps out of the airplane before it crashes into the mountain.
- Johnny somehow manages to keep the airplane level enough that he and the rest of the party can jump out using their parachutes.
- The adventurers float down onto the dry field below.
- Duke surveys the field that the party landed in, in order to find the path to the city of Arat.
- "I see a road over there!" Johnny yells.
- The party begins walking towards the city in the distance. After a few minutes, they hear the sound of a airplane crashing into the mountain behind them. Suddenly, a fireball appears in the distance. An explosion rocks the sky for miles around. Soon, the quiet countryside is silent once more.
- Johnny scans the sky for signs of the demon. "He must be here, if he shot those fireballs at the plane. WHERE ARE YOU DEMON EFREET?"
- "I'm over here, mortals." The demonic voice comes from everywhere and nowhere. "You actually thought you could defeat me? I am lord over thousands of worlds. Your world will make me stronger than ever. Soon, the afterlife will be ruled by me. Souls will populate my armies for all time!"
- "Over my dead body!" Johnny yells.
- Johnny looks at his belt for something that could harm a demon.
- Susumono reaches to the holster at his hip for his gun, draws it, and aims carefully at the demon.
- Buusta grabs a throwing axe from his belt.
- Johnny begins praying to God.
- Duke looks at the trees, and begins running towards them, hoping to lose the demon among the foliage.
- The demon disappears in a cloud of smoke.
- "BOO!" The demon efreets appears behind Susumono and puts his demonic hand over his mouth...
- Meanwhile, Duke continues running through forest. He runs for half an hour, before he realizes that the demon is gone.
- Buusta throws the throwing axe at the demon efreet, then follows up the assult with a dash of blinding powder from a flask at his belt. The demon yells "Damn you, mortals!" as he covers his eyes.
- Buusta takes out his flintlock pistol and shoots at the efreet, but the bullet simply bounces off his fire resistance.
- The efreet blows fire at Buusta, but the rogue leaps behind a tree in time to avoid the blast.
- "Come on! Let's kill it!" Johnny yells.
- "NO! Wait your turn!" Susumono yells back.
- Sensing the attack, Duke turns around and activates RAGE mode, rushing back to the party at incredible high speed.
- Duke swings his sword at the efreet, but the demon disappears once more.
- "Motherfucker, where are you?" Johnny yells.
- The efreet reappears behind him and backhands him to the ground.
- "Johnny!" Susumono yells in horror, as he tries to shoot the efreet. The bullet bounces off harmlessly.
- Susumono teleports behind the demon efreet, and stabs the demon through its back with his longsword. Black ichor leaks out of the wound.
- The efreet roars in pain and anger as it swings its fist, hitting Susumono with such force that the soldier is flung into a nearby rock. The rock shatters upon contact, and the shards tear through the soldier's skin.
- "Motherfucker..." Susumono groans in pain.
- The demonic lord turns to look at the other three humans.
- Drawing a bead with his revolver, johnny aims carefully for the longsword wound on the demon, and takes a shot.
- The bullet flies true, and enters the demon's body through the longsword wound. The demon winces in pain as blood spurts out of its wound.
- "Ha! Missed me!" The demon laughs, and... begins changing form!
- The demon grows wings, and its face becomes more feline.
- "I'm not a damn efreet! You're fighting a catoblepas you idiots!" The catoblepas bellows, and opens its mouth.
- Buusta turns to the rest of the party and whispers "how the hell does this damn thing even play an instrument?!". With a shrug, Buusta performs a shadow dance in order to raise the party's evasion. With a laugh, he taunts the catoblepas, "we're gonna make you play the best song in the world!"
- The catoblepas bellows, and flicks its tail. The whip wraps around Buusta's legs, tripping him up.
- Johnny begins taking potshots at the catoblepas. The bullets bounce off harmlessly, but they distract it enough for Buusta to recover from his failed taunt and dodge out of the way of the followup horn attack.
- In his unstoppable range, Duke the barbarian runs of to the catoblepas in order to grapple and suplex it to the ground. While he succeeds, the creature is far too heavy and powerful to be brought down by this alone. A mighty hoof stomps on the barbarian's chest, forcing the air out of his lungs.
- The catoblepas breaths in, and opens its mouth to breath out a cone of negative energy. Johnny catches it full force, but the rest are shielded by Susumono's magic force shield.
- Johnny clutches his negative energy wounds and sputters "Fuck this!". With a roar, Johnny starts clambering up the catoblepas' back in order to bring it down. The catoblepas notices this, and tries to throw Johnny off with a series of wild jumps. While it succeeds in throwing Johnny to the ground, it soon finds itself being dragged down as well.
- Johnny gives out a yell while clinging onto the catoblepas' back leg. With a raging yell, he grips his blade tightly and swings with all his might. The blade sinks deep into the fleshy part of the catoblepas' back leg.
- Susumono climbs out of the crater. "Well, since regular bullets don't work, let's try these MAGIC BULLETS!" SUsuono loads his gun with the magical bullets and fires a full clip at the catoblepas. The bullets bounce off harmlessly, but in a surprise twist, the catoblepas catches on fire.
- "Goddammit!" The catoblepas bellows, jumping up and down in an effort to get the fire out.
- "Now's our chance! Let's do it now! MOVE OUT!" The Royal Barrister yells to the party.
- Johnny runs full force at the catoblepas, catching it off guard.
- With a running start, Buusta the rogue does a powerslide underneath the catoblepas, and with a kick, strikes the catoblepas right in its weak, vurnerable kidney.
- "YEAH! GO GO GO! FINISH IT!" Duke screams at the top of his lungs, and with one last powerful swing, Johnny strikes a hefty blow to the catoblepas' neck. With a mighty swing, the catoblepas' head flies off, killing it instantly.
- Duke crosses his hands in prayer "Thank you Jesus".
- Johnny the rogue says "Fuck this bullshit, I'm taking this tusks and going native".
- The rest of the tusks are distributed equitably among the party, and a great feast is held in the village to celebrate the death of a catoblepas.
- Buusta consorts the villagers to take all the bones from the corpse of the catoblepas, and arrange them into a macabre xylophone. As the party feasts, the villagers play the best song in the world on the catoblepas's bones. "Ha, so this is how the efreet plays the best song in the world!" Buusta smirks.
- Johnny gets shitfaced and starts singing "Fuck bitches, get money! My name is Johnny!" over and over again.
- Duke takes Susumono to one side. "Hey, I'm gonna need some more of that milk. This is... Real good."
- The Royal Barrister says "I'm satisfied. This was a good adventure."
- "So, what's next on the agenda?"
- You are a party of adventurers, summoned to the court of the King Samir, the Sultan of Smooth, ruler of the Land that Grooves. The Land that Grooves is filled with sand, camels, spices, glimmering golden terminates, and the world's finest dancers, who jive to the beat of the land's hoppin' music.
- Samir has grown bored of the kingdom's music, and has been searching his lands for the musician that will play him the best song in the world. The kingdom's prophets foretold that the best song in the world can only be played by magical demon efreets, who inhabit the mystical land of the Dub Steppes, to the north of Samir's Kingdom. In order to capture the efreet, Samir ordered his army to collect the kingdom's finest adventurers and bring them to his court.
- Your party of adventurers stands in front of King Samir, who lazily slouches in his throne in front of the royal entourage. His turban bobs to the tune of a strange song played by the court musician. Suddenly, Samir stops bobbing. With a slight frown, Samir raises his hand. A guard standing behind the musician beheads the court musician. The head rolls to the floor, striking an ominous chord on the late musician's lute.
- "No, that music will not do at all. Not one bit. We need music with SOUL. Yes, you adventurers shall journey forth in a quest capture a magical demon efreet from the Dub Steppe, and bind him to play me the best song in the world!"
- And with a wry smile, he turns to the party of adventurers.The first member of the adventurer party is Susumono, the harlequin rogue. Susumono carries a longsword, a dagger, and a gun.
- The second member of the adventurer party is Johnny, the rogue. Johnny carries a dagger, and a gun.
- The third member of the adventurer party is Duke, the Barbarians. Duke has a greatsword, a greatclub, and a "10 foot long pole". The "10 foot long pole" is Duke's nickname for his penis.
- The fourth and final member of the adventurer party is Buusta, the rogue. Buusta carries two daggers.
- "You there! You look like the leader of this fine group of ragtag adventurers! Tell me, are you ready to capture a demon efreet and force him to play the best song in the world?"
- Duke speaks up. Duke says "We will capture the demon and make it kneel before us as it plays the best song in the world!"
- "Hmm, I'm not sure about you..."
- Duke lets out a yell.
- "WHAT?!"
- Samir, the Sultan of the Land that Grooves, lets out a laugh.
- "Well, I'm glad you're confident! Let's get down to buisness then."
- Your party is introduced to the Royal Barrister, an old man with white hair and a golden mustache.
- Buusta starts conversing with the Royal Barrister, saying "You don't look so old do ya, old man". While the Barrister is distracted Johnny the rogue attempts to pick the Barisster's pockets.
- The Royal Barrister looks around, then he whispers "I'm 7.... 8..... 9... 10... 11.... fuck..."
- The Royal Barrister pulls out a golden pocketwatch and gives it to Johnny.
- "Take this, pretty pleeeeeease?"
- You and your companions are shocked. The Royal Barrister just gave away his most prized possession!
- "Ah what the hell, we have other watches."
- Johnny scuffs in scorn, and throws away the golden pocketwatch. As it careens over Johnny's shoulder, Susumono reaches out and snatches the golden pocketwatch from midair, and pockets it. Johnny looks on in shock, while Susumono grins.
- "Heh." Buusta chuckles.
- "Alright adventurers, let me tell you about the demon efreet..."
- You learn that the demon efreet has been plaguing the region near the city of Arat. The demon stands at 18 hands, and it's fierce red body is topped with a firey head of hair. The demon has been terrorizing the villagers of Arat, demanding virgin blood and unborn children. If the villagers do not give in to this wicked demon's demands, they are killed and their village is burnt down to the ground.
- Duke scoffs and beats his chest. Duke says "18 hands? Pff, I've killed ogres way bigger than that!"
- "Yeah, you're pretty tough..." the barrister says sarcastically.
- The barrister changes his tone to a more serious one and continues "The demon efreet is made of fire, so it will be vulnerable to water and frost attacks."
- "Hey wait!" Johnny says, raising his hand. The Royal Barrister looks at Johnny.
- Johnny says "Wait, I don't have water and frost attacks, I only have this dagger and this gun. How would you say the efreet demon fares against... bullets?"
- The Royal Barrister thinks for a minute, stroking his mustache.
- "Hmm, that's a good question."
- The Royal Barrister looks at Johnny's gun and his eyes light up.
- "I got it!"
- The Royal Barrister says "The demon efreet has 75% fire resistance and 25% physical resistance."
- The Royal Barrister chuckles and takes a puff of his cigar.
- "That oughta even things out a bit!"
- Johnny nods sagely. Buusta butts in and says "Wait a second, where exactly is the city of Arat? How do we get the city? And how much are we getting paid exactly?"
- The Royal Barrister smiles and says "You're getting paid 80 gold coins when you take out the demon efreet. You'll be flown to Arat by airplane, and from there you can take a carriage to the village of Arat. As for how you get back... well that'll be on you!"
- "Whoa whoa whoa, wait. FLOWN in an airplane?"
- The Royal Barrister nods proudly. Johnny whistles in awe.
- Before the party boards the airplane, Susumono asks the Royal Barrister a question. "How long do we have at the village of Aray before the demon efreet shows up again?"
- "You have three days."
- The adventurers board the airplane and settle in. Johnny is sitting in the first seat, right behind the pilot.
- "Hey, do you think you can let me sit up front? I really want to see how this airplane flies!" Susumono asks the flight attendant, who nods. Susumono goes and sits up front.
- After a few minutes of sitting in the airplane, Johnny gets bored.
- While strapped into his seat in the airplane in first class, Duke the barbarian is having a feast with the in-flight refreshments, eating all the food and drinking all the beer.
- Suddenly, the demon efreet makes his move!
- The demon efreet strikes the airplane with a fireball, damaging the wing.
- The airplane begins shaking and out of control!
- Johnny, Susumono and Buusta struggle to buckle in their seatbelts as the plane begins to shake.
- "What's happening?" Buusta screams.
- Johnny looks out the window and sees that they're headed for a mountain! "We're going to hit a mountain!"
- Johnny takes the reins from the pilot in order to steady the airplane. "Don't worry, I have over 5000 hours of flight time logged."
- Johnny steers the airplane away from the mountain, but they're still headed for a field. Suddenly the airplane veers back towards the mountain.
- "Fuck! I'm steering as best I can, but some asshole stole our first officer's seat!" Johnny yells.
- "It was me! I was sitting here!" Buusta yells.
- Buusta yells to the party. "Don't forget our magical parachutes! WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO JUMP!", and with a scream, the party leaps out of the airplane before it crashes into the mountain.
- Johnny somehow manages to keep the airplane level enough that he and the rest of the party can jump out using their parachutes.
- The adventurers float down onto the dry field below.
- Duke surveys the field that the party landed in, in order to find the path to the city of Arat.
- "I see a road over there!" Johnny yells.
- The party begins walking towards the city in the distance. After a few minutes, they hear the sound of a airplane crashing into the mountain behind them. Suddenly, a fireball appears in the distance. An explosion rocks the sky for miles around. Soon, the quiet countryside is silent once more.
- Johnny scans the sky for signs of the demon. "He must be here, if he shot those fireballs at the plane. WHERE ARE YOU DEMON EFREET?"
- "I'm over here, mortals." The demonic voice comes from everywhere and nowhere. "You actually thought you could defeat me? I am lord over thousands of worlds. Your world will make me stronger than ever. Soon, the afterlife will be ruled by me. Souls will populate my armies for all time!"
- "Over my dead body!" Johnny yells.
- Johnny looks at his belt for something that could harm a demon.
- Susumono reaches to the holster at his hip for his gun, draws it, and aims carefully at the demon.
- Buusta grabs a throwing axe from his belt.
- Johnny begins praying to God.
- Duke looks at the trees, and begins running towards them, hoping to lose the demon among the foliage.
- The demon disappears in a cloud of smoke.
- "BOO!" The demon efreets appears behind Susumono and puts his demonic hand over his mouth...
- Meanwhile, Duke continues running through forest. He runs for half an hour, before he realizes that the demon is gone.
- Buusta throws the throwing axe at the demon efreet, then follows up the assult with a dash of blinding powder from a flask at his belt. The demon yells "Damn you, mortals!" as he covers his eyes.
- Buusta takes out his flintlock pistol and shoots at the efreet, but the bullet simply bounces off his fire resistance.
- The efreet blows fire at Buusta, but the rogue leaps behind a tree in time to avoid the blast.
- "Come on! Let's kill it!" Johnny yells.
- "NO! Wait your turn!" Susumono yells back.
- Sensing the attack, Duke turns around and activates RAGE mode, rushing back to the party at incredible high speed.
- Duke swings his sword at the efreet, but the demon disappears once more.
- "Motherfucker, where are you?" Johnny yells.
- The efreet reappears behind him and backhands him to the ground.
- "Johnny!" Susumono yells in horror, as he tries to shoot the efreet. The bullet bounces off harmlessly.
- Susumono teleports behind the demon efreet, and stabs the demon through its back with his longsword. Black ichor leaks out of the wound.
- The efreet roars in pain and anger as it swings its fist, hitting Susumono with such force that the soldier is flung into a nearby rock. The rock shatters upon contact, and the shards tear through the soldier's skin.
- "Motherfucker..." Susumono groans in pain.
- The demonic lord turns to look at the other three humans.
- Drawing a bead with his revolver, johnny aims carefully for the longsword wound on the demon, and takes a shot.
- The bullet flies true, and enters the demon's body through the longsword wound. The demon winces in pain as blood spurts out of its wound.
- "Ha! Missed me!" The demon laughs, and... begins changing form!
- The demon grows wings, and its face becomes more feline.
- "I'm not a damn efreet! You're fighting a catoblepas you idiots!" The catoblepas bellows, and opens its mouth.
- Buusta turns to the rest of the party and whispers "how the hell does this damn thing even play an instrument?!". With a shrug, Buusta performs a shadow dance in order to raise the party's evasion. With a laugh, he taunts the catoblepas, "we're gonna make you play the best song in the world!"
- The catoblepas bellows, and flicks its tail. The whip wraps around Buusta's legs, tripping him up.
- Johnny begins taking potshots at the catoblepas. The bullets bounce off harmlessly, but they distract it enough for Buusta to recover from his failed taunt and dodge out of the way of the followup horn attack.
- In his unstoppable range, Duke the barbarian runs of to the catoblepas in order to grapple and suplex it to the ground. While he succeeds, the creature is far too heavy and powerful to be brought down by this alone. A mighty hoof stomps on the barbarian's chest, forcing the air out of his lungs.
- The catoblepas breaths in, and opens its mouth to breath out a cone of negative energy. Johnny catches it full force, but the rest are shielded by Susumono's magic force shield.
- Johnny clutches his negative energy wounds and sputters "Fuck this!". With a roar, Johnny starts clambering up the catoblepas' back in order to bring it down. The catoblepas notices this, and tries to throw Johnny off with a series of wild jumps. While it succeeds in throwing Johnny to the ground, it soon finds itself being dragged down as well.
- Johnny gives out a yell while clinging onto the catoblepas' back leg. With a raging yell, he grips his blade tightly and swings with all his might. The blade sinks deep into the fleshy part of the catoblepas' back leg.
- Susumono climbs out of the crater. "Well, since regular bullets don't work, let's try these MAGIC BULLETS!" SUsuono loads his gun with the magical bullets and fires a full clip at the catoblepas. The bullets bounce off harmlessly, but in a surprise twist, the catoblepas catches on fire.
- "Goddammit!" The catoblepas bellows, jumping up and down in an effort to get the fire out.
- "Now's our chance! Let's do it now! MOVE OUT!" The Royal Barrister yells to the party.
- Johnny runs full force at the catoblepas, catching it off guard.
- With a running start, Buusta the rogue does a powerslide underneath the catoblepas, and with a kick, strikes the catoblepas right in its weak, vurnerable kidney.
- "YEAH! GO GO GO! FINISH IT!" Duke screams at the top of his lungs, and with one last powerful swing, Johnny strikes a hefty blow to the catoblepas' neck. With a mighty swing, the catoblepas' head flies off, killing it instantly.
- Duke crosses his hands in prayer "Thank you Jesus".
- Johnny the rogue says "Fuck this bullshit, I'm taking this tusks and going native".
- The rest of the tusks are distributed equitably among the party, and a great feast is held in the village to celebrate the death of a catoblepas.
- Buusta consorts the villagers to take all the bones from the corpse of the catoblepas, and arrange them into a macabre xylophone. As the party feasts, the villagers play the best song in the world on the catoblepas's bones. "Ha, so this is how the efreet plays the best song in the world!" Buusta smirks.
- Johnny gets shitfaced and starts singing "Fuck bitches, get money! My name is Johnny!" over and over again.
- Duke takes Susumono to one side. "Hey, I'm gonna need some more of that milk. This is... Real good."
- The Royal Barrister says "I'm satisfied. This was a good adventure."
- "So, what's next on the agenda?"
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