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- Introduction.
- Hello, my name is Johnny Knoxville, and welcome to...
- Wait...
- Wrong intro.
- Hello, my name is Stephen, and I am not a homosexual.
- This is a book about me and my homosexual partner, David (Maverick).
- Throughout this book you will learn of our many adventures. Some ending in comedy, some in tragedy, and some in satire. You will learn of how we are NOT gay. Of how we are NOT in denial. Of how we are both in relationships with beautiful women (Spoiler: Mine is better). And that one of them has big hair (Not mine).(Spoiler lol we are both single but you know. We weren't at the time of writing that. Not that I'm going to change it. Mine wasn't even better.)
- I hope you find the stories in this tome to be at the least interesting, and at the most homoerotic. Goodbye, and happy reading.
- -Stephen Safranek
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