The Edge Of Greatness

EARLY RELEASE FOR MY $50+ PATRONS! THANK YOU!!

So if you've read my previous Catradora fic Just Us you'll probably recognize a few little hints/throwbacks. This could basically be a prequel to that fic. It takes place pre-series, but not by long. A few months prior, perhaps.

I'd wanted to break this into two chapters, but... couldn't find a good spot to do it without breaking the flow. So enjoy this super long oneshot. It's sort of a roller-coaster between good and bad moments.

Disclaimer: I do not own She-Ra.

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												The Edge Of Greatness

Adora rolls over in bed with a soft moan. She knows it's already morning and that she's going to have to get up soon, but she just wants a few more minutes...

She slides her feet with care, not wanting to rouse Catra yet. But when she moves, Adora doesn't feel her partner's warmth or weight by her ankles like she usually does. She frowns and tries to decipher where she might be, but can't decide.

Eventually it makes her worried enough to open her eyes.

She finds herself staring directly into blue and yellow.

"Gyaah! C-Catra!"

"Oh good, you're awake." Catra swishes her tail from where she's crouching over her, practically nose-to-nose. Adora gives her a gentle push as she recovers from the shock.

"Geez, Catra! One of these days, I swear... Aren't you always the one complaining about 'personal space'?"

"Yeah, I guess. But it's different with you. I never really minded."

"Well, I mind sometimes, y'know. Like first thing in the freaking morning."

"Aw c'mon, don't be like that." Catra takes both of her hands and helps Adora sit up. "Remember, today we get to do free-reign training, so we can do whatever we want!"

"That's not what free-reign means, Catra," she sighs. "But you're right. It should be pretty fun." She smiles and ruffles Catra's hair to signify that she forgives her for the early-morning jump-scare.

Catra lets out a soft purr and grins. She then stretches her arms out across Adora's lap, leaning her weight forward until she works the kinks out of her muscles and lets her shoulders pop. Adora stretches her arms above her head, using different methods to achieve the same results.

The other cadets rouse themselves shortly afterward. Everyone gets dressed and ready for the day, meandering to the mess hall for their morning gruel and tough bread. Catra doesn't even complain about the tasteless flavor this time because she's too excited about today.

"I can't wait," she sighs. "We don't have to worry about anyone keeping an eye on us. We can just-"

"Do whatever we want?" Adora guesses.

"Within Horde expectations, of course," Catra assures. Adora rolls her eyes, but chuckles.

After a few minutes, their other teammates come to join them. They all discuss what their plans are for the day, and talking about it makes them all even more excited.

"You guys are goin' together, right?" Lohnie asks, looking to the both of them. "What are you gonna do?"

"Probably combat practice," Adora suggests. "Or a patrol. We're not sure yet."

"Oh, yeah," Lohnie nods. "Rogelio, Kyle and I definitely gotta do some combat practice."

"Y-Yeah," Kyle agrees. "I gotta work on a few things..."

"Just a few?" Catra grins. "Last time you barely got a hit off before you ended up flat on your ass!" She laughs outright, but in a good-natured way. Kyle chuckles too, and in seconds it spreads across the table.

Everyone's in such a good mood they don't notice when a dreary, familiar figure slips into the room.

Catra is still guffawing, nearly with tears in her eyes, even long after the others have clammed up. Adora tries to warn her.

"Catra-"

"Hah, what-?"

"Pardon me." A deep, terrifying drawl of a voice cuts off Catra's laughter and sends chills up every spine as Shadow-Weaver makes her unnerving presence known. She glides over to the table of lively cadets and begins to circle them slowly, like a wolf. "I do hope I'm not interrupting anything important."

Adora straightens up right away to address her.

"Of course not, Shadow-Weaver."

"Good. Then if that's the case-" She strikes out one of her hands and lands it rather harshly on Catra's shoulder, causing her to jolt. "I'd like a moment alone with you."

Any traces of merriment or smiles disappear. Everyone else goes tense and suddenly looks down at their food.

Catra's wide eyes turn to Adora in a silent plea for help. She hates this part...

Adora does to. She doesn't know what Shadow-Weaver does to her friend, but before just about every big mission or assignment, she'll make it a point to come find them and take Catra away for a few moments.

Adora can only imagine she's being threatened into submission. She can see it in Catra's eyes now that whatever it is, she doesn't want to do it again.

Adora quickly pushes herself to her feet.

"I'm finished. I'll come with you."

She sees a flash of relief in Catra's eyes.

But Shadow-Weaver rests her other hand tenderly on Adora's shoulder, and speaks much more pleasantly.

"No need, my dearest Adora. I need only this one."

"But-"

"We're just going to talk." There's no room in her tone for arguments. With a swipe of the hand she has on Catra's shoulder, she forces her up. In contrast, she lets Adora go with care.

Adora can only watch helplessly as Shadow-Weaver takes her best friend away. Catra casts one last scared, longing glance back over her shoulder. Adora can only bow her head in shame, apology, and defeat.

Catra has no choice but to turn around and walk.

She's already trembling long before Shadow-Weaver takes her out of the mess hall. She never does it in front of other people. She always makes sure they're alone.

Catra tries to stand tall and hold her head proudly. Every time, she tells herself it will be the last time she'll be afraid of Shadow-Weaver.

But every time she's forced to look into that haunting mask of crimson and shadow, those white soulless eyes...

A sudden whirl of motion has Catra freezing. Her heart jumps halfway up her throat as Shadow-Weaver rounds on her with cold, quiet fury.

"I trust you know why I've brought you here...?" It's just some abandoned hallway, but the location isn't significant. It's the lack of occupants she wants.

Catra tries to keep herself calm.

"Yeah. I know why. I'm not going to let anything happen to Adora. I swear. So can we please just-"

"You swear it, do you?" There's a challenge in her frigid, ruthless voice. "Somehow I don't believe you. You've never been very good at keeping to your word, you know."

"Only with crap that doesn't matter! But with Adora, I-"

"Silence!" The shadows reel and come to life all at once. Catra flinches, but her blood runs cold and she can't move. Shadow-Weaver sways closer, hypnotic, dizzying swirls of black and red filling Catra's vision as the cruel voice stings her flattened ears:

"You will see to it that nothing happens to my Adora."

Catra bites her lip until she tastes blood. She feels the cold hard hand grab the side of her face, feels the shadows reaching out for her.

"No-"

"You know what will happen if you disobey me."

Catra tries to close off her mind. She tries with all her might.

But Shadow-Weaver invades just like every other time.

Her shadows pluck and painfully drag out all of Catra's memories with Adora one by one; all their mock battles together, all their nights huddled up talking until sunrise, all their victories and smiles and laughs...

The voice of torment echoes out and shudders through Catra's mind.

"If anything happens to Adora..."

Catra yelps as another memory is snatched and forced to the forefront of her mind. It's one of Adora, of her smiling more brightly than the sun ever could...

And then it vanishes forever.

Shadow-Weaver's voice whispers her final warning:

"I will take her from you."

"No!" Catra screams, frantically trying to pick up the pieces of her shattered mind. Shadow-Weaver steps back and lets her go.

"I trust you understand, girl."

And with that she vanishes like she'd never been there at all.

Catra drops to her knees, clutching her head in her claws so tightly she nearly draws more blood. Tears well up and spill over as she desperately tries to remember what had just been on her mind.

But she can't. She can't remember.

"No..."

Usually Shadow-Weaver would just threaten her, just scare her into submission. But this was the first time she'd ever actually stolen a memory from her.

"No... No... give it back... please-"

But Shadow-Weaver is long gone, and wouldn't have listened anyway.

Catra curls in on herself, biting back another scream, trying to stifle the sobs into her knees. She remembers as many of her times spent with Adora as she can, but she can't recognize which instance might be missing. It could have been anything, but she'll never know it now.

She's lost a part of herself, a piece of her heart. She feels so violated, so incomplete, so defeated...

"Adora..."

She chokes out her name, as though doing so might bring back the memory that had been erased...

. . .

As for Adora herself, she'd been anxious ever since Shadow-Weaver had come to bring Catra away. This wouldn't be the first time – far from it – but it still makes her as fearful and upset as the first time had.

She still didn't know what Shadow-Weaver did to her. She'd only ever take Catra away for a few minutes, but every time Catra came back to Adora, she would always look unnaturally tense and shaken.

Adora would always ask what had happened, and Catra would only ever respond with "it was nothing" or "she just gave me a lecture." But Adora never fully believed her.

She sits in tense silence now with her other friends, waiting for Catra to rejoin them. But it takes her longer than usual this time, long enough for Adora's stomach to start churning.

She can't take it anymore.

She stands abruptly, flashing the others a quick apologetic glance.

"Sorry, guys. I'll see you later."

They all seem to understand.

Adora hurries out of the mess hall with almost dizzying speed, blood pumping hard.

"Catra?" She calls softly to the empty hallway beyond. She doesn't see or hear any signs of her, or of Shadow-Weaver. Cautiously, Adora steps forward and begins her search.

/Did Shadow-Weaver take her somewhere else? But where? And for what purpose?/

Suddenly, Adora freezes when a small sound reaches her ears. Someone's crying. And she recognizes that rasp of a voice instantly.

"Catra..." She starts to run down the hall, following the sound as it leads her to the source. She rounds the corner- "Catra!"

Adora finds her there, crumpled to the floor, hunched over her knees as though she'd been physically wounded. Adora drops down beside her and puts an arm around her shoulders.

"Catra? Catra? What's going on?"

She feels her jolt, hears her whimper thickly in the back of her throat as Catra slowly lifts her head. Her eyes are glazed with tears and torment.

"Ah... dora..." She reaches for her with shaking arms and clings onto her shoulders.

Adora pulls her close tightly, arms firm and unwavering over Catra's quivering back.

"Catra... what-? What did she do to you...?"

Catra sniffles and does her best to sound normal.

"Oh, y'know... just another lecture-"

"Catra, don't-" Adora hugs her tighter. "Please don't. Enough with the lies. Just... please tell me the truth. What's she doing to you...?"

And this time Catra isn't strong enough to even try to keep up the act. She just slumps more heavily into Adora's arms and burrows her face into the side of her neck.

"I... really don't wanna talk about it..."

Adora feels a pang shoot through her chest. She bites her lip; she wants to know, but she doesn't want to push Catra to tell her if it'll only cause her more pain. All she can think to do is to change tactics.

"Is there... anything I can do...? Anything at all, Catra..."

She waits. Catra heaves a shuddering breath against her chest and swallows thickly.

"Just this..." she rasps. "This is good enough..."

Adora still doesn't believe her, that simply holding Catra would be able to make right whatever wrongs Shadow-Weaver had done unto her. But if that's all Catra wants to tell her, then Adora can only comply.

She squeezes her as tightly as she can, feeling a familiar tail curl around her hip. Catra's claws tremble and dig into her clothes as the sobbing begins to fade, and the shivering dies down.

Adora just feels so helpless. Seeing Catra's pain brings Adora a different but equally damaging kind of suffering. She just wants to help, to be there for her when she needs it most...

She feels Catra draw in a deep, steadying breath before exhaling it against her shoulder. At last, she eases back and wipes her face clean of tears. Adora still maintains a loose, uncertain hold on her waist. She waits until Catra has finished wiping her eyes before addressing her softly.

"Catra...? Please just-"

"Let's-" Catra cuts her off pointedly. "Let's just drop it, Adora."

"But-"

"Please-" Her voice nearly cracks in desperation. She can't look Adora in the eye.

Adora has no choice but to accept the terms of silence. So she just dips her head and abides by Catra's wishes.

She helps her best friend to her feet, feeling Catra is still a bit shaky from whatever ordeal had transpired. Catra holds onto her only as much as she needs to before staggering back a pace. Adora isn't quite sure where to go from here.

"Do you... wanna cancel our mission and just-"

"What are you saying?" Catra growls. "No way. I'm fine."

"I didn't ask if you were," Adora mumbles.

Catra's ears flatten.

"Adora, please. I really don't wanna talk about it anymore..."

Adora has to accept her feelings and let it go for now. So she lifts her chin and tries out a smile.

"All right then. Come on, it's our day to do some training and scouting without anyone to breathe down our necks." She offers her hand, for more reasons than one. Catra only accepts with a snort.

As they walk, Adora is glad to gradually feel Catra regaining her balance and confidence. She holds herself proudly once again, and she finally lifts her gaze up from the floor.

Perhaps what Shadow-Weaver had done hadn't been that bad after all.

/Or Catra's just so used to it by now it doesn't affect her as much.../

Adora refuses to believe Catra's statement that everything was fine. She still wants to know the truth; even if it might hurt Catra more, Adora wants to be able to help her in the end.

But for now those thoughts are placed on hold as they arrive at their barracks. When other cadets and their commanding officers are in sight, the girls quietly release one another's hands and wait for orders.

They're given their coordinates and location, and told to use their time wisely.

By the time they're dismissed, Adora's glad to see her partner has gotten a bit of her spunk back. Catra's tail is waving with excitement as she hurries to her locker to pull out her training staff.

"Come on, Adora! Let's take these with us."

Adora follows to her own locker and retrieves her own staff.

"Good idea. We can do a bit of training along the way."

Catra's tail curls up at the praise.

Together they make for the exit, and once they're out, Catra seems visibly relieved to be out of Shadow-Weaver's territory. She finally cracks that trademark smile with a glint in her eyes.

"So we're near the outskirts, right?"

"Yeah."

"Sweet! C'mon, let's go!"

"Catra, hold on a-" But her excitable partner has already dropped into a crouch and sprung off. Adora's at least a little glad to see her back to her old self. "Hey, wait up!" She gives chase, and Catra calls back to her.

"Slowpoke! What's takin' you so long?"

"Hey, you know you're faster than me! Plus, you got a head-start!"

"Aw, excuses!"

They take off together at a lively pace, Catra teasing and leading her on as Adora tries to keep up. Before long their laughter rises up to lighten the dark, heavy atmosphere of the Fright Zone, just a little.

By the time they do finally reach their location, both girls are a bit breathless, Adora from trying to surpass Catra and Catra from trying to maintain her lead. She'd won in the end, of course.

"Ha... nice try, Adora," she purrs. "But better luck next time."

"Yeah, fine... you win." Adora straightens up once she's caught her breath to take in their surroundings.

It looks like any other part of the Fright Zone, littered with debris and hunks of oozing metal. The only difference is the air; the farther away from the heart of the camp they are, the clearer the atmosphere is.

Both girls take a moment to appreciate the fresher air.

Adora steals a glance at her friend. Catra seems to be in high spirits again, ears perked and tail swishing. Adora wonders if she should try asking her about Shadow-Weaver one more time. She clears her throat.

"Hey, Catra-"

"Let's spar!"

"...Huh?"

"You heard me!" Catra draws her staff and extends it with a challenge in her eyes and a smirk on her lips. "Put 'em up!"

Adora sighs and reaches for her own weapon.

"All right. But you asked for it."

"Damn right I did."

They extend their weapons to full size and take up their stances.

Catra's tail swishes and gives her away. As soon as she charges, Adora predicts her movements and dodges, then swings a hit at her as she passes by. But Catra leaps high and dodges in turn before jumping out of range, then charging back in. Adora blocks and pushes her back, twirling her staff toward Catra to maintain distance, then sweeping it low. Catra blocks with ease, and they lock in a temporary stalemate.

"Hah!" Catra muses. "Seriously, you are so predictable, Adora. No way you're gonna be able to beat a single one of those rotten rebellion princesses like this!"

"Since when are you so chatty during a fight? You'd better stay focused!" Adora gives her a shove and goes in for another attack. But while the push might've unbalanced anyone else, Catra's tail keeps her perfectly on her feet and allows her smooth avoidance. She lands a blow to Adora's back and staggers her.

"You're gonna have to do better than that, princess."

Adora turns a friendly glare at her.

"Do not call me a princess!"

Catra laughs, and their battle commences.

They attack and dodge and swipe at each other, they jump and twist and push, and fake each other out.

Catra, naturally being the more agile of the two, uses her surroundings to her advantage. She jumps high up onto the slouched buildings and heaps of junk metal to get a better view of her prey, chooses a good angle, and then leaps down at her.

But Adora is always ready for her, no matter how hard Catra tries to land a blow. Adora dodges when she can and uses the split vulnerable second of Catra's landing to make her move. But Catra predicts her and jumps back out of range.

They continue for a while, only landing minor hits here and there, but nothing significant enough to determine a winner.

As the fight continues, Adora is feeling more confident in herself. She knows Catra can get excited and use up a lot of energy in the initial stages of a fight, but her stamina isn't always the greatest. All Adora has to do is wait for the right moment...

She knows it when she sees it. Catra has just climbed up high again, and this time it's less because she wants to get in a good hit, and more because she wants to get away for a second to catch her breath. Adora is panting as well, but she doesn't let it get into her voice.

"Come on, Catra. Tired already?"

"You wish."

The verbal bait works like a charm. Catra jumps down before she's fully ready to, fueled by that spark of annoyance Adora's comment had ignited.

And this time Adora enacts her plan. It's a risky one, but one she has faith in.

As Catra attacks, Adora blocks the initial hit, but lets herself fall back a second later and drops onto all fours, making it seem as if Catra has unbalanced her. She hears Catra laugh as she twirls her staff above her head.

"Funny how you were talkin' so big and now you're about to lose."

"That's what you think!"

Adora braces herself on her hands and knees and hooks a sharp kick behind her at Catra's ankles. Catra jumps to avoid it. But the second her feet land once again, before she can gather more strength for another dodge, Adora grabs her staff and swings it.

Catra gasps even before the blow hits, already realizing her mistake, but too late.

The stick smashes into the bone of her ankle, sending intense, immediate pain shooting up her leg. She sputters and yowls as she's knocked down to the ground with a thud. Her staff roles away from her, and a moan of pain rises up.

Adora winces at the impact of her fall.

/Crap. That might've been a bit too hard.../

She gets to her feet and hurries to her. Catra's curled in on herself and is grabbing at her ankle, hissing sharply.

"Oooooww, shit-"

"Catra? Are you okay?"

"What does it look like?"

"Well, it looks like the trick you used last time and then attacked me out of nowhere."

"Seriously? Ah- that was one time! I give up, okay? You win."

Considering her weapon has gotten away from her and that she's still going on about her ankle, Adora opts to believe her. She retracts her own staff and puts it in her belt before crouching down beside her friend.

"Sorry about that. Guess I used a bit too much force for just sparring practice."

But to her surprise, Catra rolls over onto her back to smirk up at her.

"Are you kidding? That was a sick feint you used. Finally something I couldn't predict five moves in advance."

Adora perks up a bit.

"Really?"

"Sure. There's nothing wrong with getting a little into it."

"But are you actually okay?"

"I'm fiiiine. It just stunned me for a sec." To prove it Catra pushes herself up into a crouch. Adora sees her wince, but before she can say anything, Catra gets to her feet. She doesn't stay there long. "Ow, ow, ow!" Hissing a breath in through grit teeth, Catra collapses right back to the ground. Adora quickly reaches out to catch her.

"Catra?!"

"Oww... yeah, okay maybe that... still hurts a little..."

"How little?"

"Like a lot."

"Oh." Adora glances down toward Catra's sore ankle. Through the tears in her pants she can see the skin is swollen and bright red. "Sorry."

"Don't be," Catra grunts. "It was a good hit."

"But there's no way you're gonna be able to make it back to camp like this."

"I'll be fine. Just gotta get used to it."

"Hold on a second!" Feeling she's about to try and get up again, Adora keeps both hands on her shoulders to hold her down. "Catra, I know you're tough, but have you ever considered, oh I dunno, trying to heal the pain instead of just getting used to it?"

Catra's ears twitch a little before slowly angling downward.

"It's fine. I'm pretty good at getting used to it."

Her response shocks Adora into silence. She doesn't know what she can or should say back. She squeezes her friend's shoulders.

"Catra-"

"Come on, let's go back. I can walk."

Catra starts to get up, and Adora has no choice but to follow and support her, lest she stumble again. She puts an arm around Catra's back, and Catra drapes one across her shoulders, digging her claws in lightly for purchase. She hisses softly at the pain throbbing through her leg, and Adora can feel she's leaning most of her weight onto her.

"Are you sure you can walk?"

"Definitely."

They first hobble over toward Catra's misplaced weapon to collect it, then begin the trek back to base.

Adora keeps the pace slow, bracing Catra's weight against her side. She can feel how tense she is, and just about every step has her sucking in a pained breath. She's wrapped her tail around Adora's waist for support as well.

They have a long walk back, and Adora knows she'll never be able to make it. But Catra is far too proud to admit she needs help, especially for something like this that she'd only view as a trivial or minor inconvenience.

They limp together for a few more minutes, until their pace has slowed to barely a crawl. Catra is breathing quickly through her nose, trying not to let it show, but little sounds of pain keep slipping free. Adora stops.

"Catra, come on. You can't do this."

"Yes, I can."

"You can't even stand! Let alone walk back half a mile to base. Just let me carry you."

"What? I don't need you to-"

"Actually, I think you kind of do." Adora glances down at the ground. Catra has lifted up her bad foot altogether, unable to put even a bit of weight onto it. Catra's tail lashes, her ears flatten, and she snorts in irritation. But eventually she caves.

"Fine... But we can't let anyone else see!"

Adora knows she only accepted because the pain must be really bad, but she's just relieved Catra's agreed. So Adora accepts her terms as well.

"All right, fine by me."

She keeps one arm braced at the center of Catra's back, then carefully dips down to hook the other behind her knees to gather her into her arms. But the instant Adora has a hold on her, Catra shrieks.

"Hey! What the hell do you think you're doing?!"

"Catra! We already agreed I'm carrying you back!"

"Yeah, but not like this!" Catra squirms and struggles in her arms, consequently making the injured ankle sting even harder. She hisses and tries to paw Adora off of her. "No way in hell am I gonna be carried back like some no-good rebellion princess! Gross! Let me down!"

"Catra, calm down! You're gonna hurt yourself more!" Knowing she won't be able to get through to her like this, Adora gives her what she wants. She gently lets Catra back down onto her own two feet (or, one foot, rather), and steadies her. Catra's tail is still bristling with outrage and embarrassment.

"A princess carry? Are you serious, Adora?"

"Well, sorry I didn't want you walking back half a mile on an injured foot. Silly me, trying to be a good partner."

Catra just grumbles something else about princesses under her breath. Adora sighs again.

"Well, come on. There's only one other way to do this, then." She gives Catra's arm a tug and brings it over her shoulder, turning herself around to give her her back.

Catra seems to understand. She begrudgingly leans forward to press herself close, looping both arms around Adora's neck. Adora reaches back to grab her legs, being mindful of her injured foot, and leans forward to balance Catra's weight on her back.

Catra yelps softly, but when she realizes she isn't going to slip off, she exhales. Adora adjusts herself for her partner's comfort, making sure she's steady before straightening up as much as she can.

"How's this?"

She hears a huff at the side of her neck.

"It's fine, I guess. Better than being carried like a princess, anyway." Catra tightens her hold on Adora's shoulders a little.

Adora can feel a bit of the tension draining from Catra's body now that she's still. She also feels a familiar tail curling around her hip and stomach, though she can still tell Catra is trying not to lean on her too much, despite their position. Adora smiles.

"Hey, it's okay. You can relax, Catra. I've got this."

Catra sighs.

"Are you sure...?"

Adora can hear it in her voice that she hates this. She hates feeling like she's being a burden.

"Hey, what are you implying? That I'm not strong enough to carry my injured partner all the way back to camp? Do you think a Force Captain-to-be is really that weak?"

"Guess not. Only weak enough to not be able to walk on her own two feet..."

Adora flinches.

"Hey, I didn't mean it like that."

"Yeah, I know you didn't..." Catra slumps against her and heaves a deeper, longer sigh. She doesn't say anything else on the matter.

Adora doesn't want to upset her further. So she just keeps quiet and begins walking.

For a while there are no sounds other than the churning and clanking of the buildings. Adora pays attention to the route she's on, but pays greater attention to the girl on her back.

Catra's been quiet too, aside from a few occasional grunts or hisses about her ankle. Her pulse beats dully against Adora's back, just enough that she can feel it. Adora can tell she's under a heavy cloud right now. She wants to try and make it better. She treads carefully, both literally and figuratively.

"Catra? You okay...?"

There's a moment of silence as she keeps walking. Then, another sigh.

"Yeah. Better me than you, anyway."

"...What do you mean?"

"I mean if it'd been you who'd gotten hurt, Shadow-Weaver would've-" She cuts off sharply, with a sound somewhere between and gasp and a whimper. Adora stops.

"Catra? What is it?" She tightens her hold on her and tries to look back, but can't glimpse her face. "Come on, you've gotta tell me. What does Shadow-Weaver keep-"

"No-" Catra's claws suddenly dig into Adora's collar, as if she's afraid she might fall. Adora feels her heart rate spike, and her body begins to tremble. Eyes wide, she tries again to turn her face to see her.

"Catra-?"

"No-" she hisses softly, burying her face into the nape of Adora's neck. "It's nothing. Never mind."

"Catra, I can't just-"

"Adora, please..." Her voice is about to break, and Adora feels her heart is too. She wants to know what it is Shadow-Weaver does to her. But she doesn't want to hurt Catra further by making her tell and relive it.

Adora finds herself trapped in the same stalemate, not knowing where to go from here. She just feels so helpless...

"Then just... just take it easy, okay? I've got you now, Catra. I promise."

She waits a moment longer, until Catra's heart has calmed down a little and her breath has stopped shaking. To her surprise, after Catra's taken a few deep breaths, Adora soon feels the faint vibrations of a purr against her shoulder blades.

"Thanks, Adora..."

Adora can hear the small, if not tired smile in her voice. She smiles too.

"No problem, partner."

She continues the journey back to base, being mindful of Catra's condition. But by now she seems to have quieted and calmed down a bit.

When they eventually get close to camp, Adora carefully lets Catra off her back. It's a painstaking hobble back inside from there, especially when Adora has to tug her aside to avoid being seen by other officers or cadets. But somehow, they manage to make it back to the dorms without a hitch. Adora helps Catra to their shared bed and sits down with her.

"We made it. How's the ankle?"

"Sore," she huffs. "But not bad I guess."

"Not as bad as it would've been if you'd walked all the way back, huh?"

"Shut up." Catra swipes playfully at her and Adora chuckles. She rests a hand on Catra's shoulder and stands herself up.

"I'll go grab you some ice. Just stay here a sec."

And Catra's smile vanishes like the light at sunset.

She wants nothing more than to call out and beg her to stay, not to leave her alone...

But she bites back the plea, knowing it would only make Adora ask more questions.

Her ears droop and her tail begins to twitch anxiously as she watches Adora walk away, then slip out of sight. Catra's blood starts to race in her veins.

The room is still and quiet for now, but the shadows seem to be coming alive. They creep in closer, one by one, never when she can see them, but every time she turns her head they're nearer than they'd been before.

She growls, in warning and in fear, clutching the blankets with Adora's scent and pulling them into her lap.

She tries closing her eyes to block it all out.

But that only makes it worse.

The shadows come rushing in even more quickly. They grab her like gnarled vines and slowly begin to weave themselves around her body, constricting her, piercing her like thorns.

She can't remember how to open her eyes, how to find the light again.

/No.../

They wind themselves up and inward from her hands and feet, coiling around her torso and squeezing.

/No... stop it-/

They creep higher, pressing around her throat, greedy tendrils reaching out for her mind and the precious memories it harbors.

/Stop! Get the hell away-!/

"Catra?"

"Huh-?" With a loud gasp, Catra's eyes fly open once more. She finds herself back in the dorm room, which is unchanged. The shadows aren't anything more than what they should be.

Adora is standing beside her, holding a bag of crushed ice and a rag in her hand. Her eyes are wide in surprise and concern.

"Catra? What's wrong?"

Catra's ears are flat and her tail has bristled into a thick clump of fur. She swallows hard and shakes her head.

"Nothing. Just... a bit tired I guess..."

She isn't sure if Adora believes her. Catra can't bear to look her in the eye, so she keeps her gaze on the bed.

Adora notices the wrinkled blankets that had been pulled into Catra's lap as if in desperation. Something is wrong, and she knows it. She just doesn't know what.

For now, she simply sits down beside her partner, resting a hand on Catra's shoulder.

"Just take it easy. We'll go to bed early and get some rest."

Catra's fur gradually begins to lie flat again. She leans into Adora's touch a little.

"Sounds good..." Her voice is drained of the usual spunk or hint of mischief.

Adora gives her shoulder a pat before sliding her fingers down her arm, until she's found Catra's hand. She gives it a squeeze, and though Catra still doesn't look at her, she squeezes back.

Adora moves down toward her legs and picks up the ice wrapped in the rag.

"This might sting a little."

Catra doesn't seem to heed the warning. Adora isn't even sure if she heard her. Her mind seems to be wandering elsewhere, places Adora isn't sure she likes.

So she presses the ice gently onto Catra's injured ankle, hoping the shock of the cold will bring her back to where she's supposed to be.

To her relief, it seems to work. Catra tenses and digs her claws into the back of Adora's hand.

"Ow, geez!"

"Hey, I warned you. Give it a sec."

The warring sensations of cold and pain mix together for a moment until Catra feels her shin going numb. But at least it doesn't hurt anymore. She hisses out a sigh and loosens her grip on Adora. Adora smiles, glad that she's acting like her normal self again.

"Better?"

"Yeah, I guess." Catra grumbles as much, but her tail swishes softly and gives away her sense of ease now. Adora chuckles.

"You've gotta start being more honest."

"Shut up."

With Catra's pain diminished, both girls begin to relax a little more. After a few minutes, Adora gets up.

"I'll go get us some supper. You just stay here and relax."

Catra's fur instantly starts to rise again.

"Hey, I'm not an invalid! I can walk to the mess hall."

"I didn't say you couldn't." Adora knows how to play her game. "But if you end up hurting yourself more, you're just going to cause more problems for me."

Whatever comeback Catra had been preparing dies on her tongue. She bites everything back and turns away. Adora knows it was harsh of her, and she intends to apologize later. But for now it was necessary to keep Catra from straining herself.

"I'll be back in a few minutes, okay?"

Adora turns and makes her way to the doors. She never considered the fact that maybe Catra wanted to come with her simply so she wouldn't have to be left alone.

As soon as Adora's gone, Catra huddles herself back against the headboard of the bed. Lips curled into a snarl, claws out, her eyes scan the room for shadows. They creep in gradually, like the tide, such a small amount that when she blinks, she isn't really sure if they've moved at all.

/Get ahold of yourself. It's not real. Not this time at least.../

But what proof was there to say Shadow-Weaver couldn't erase her memories without physically being there? What if her shadows could move and do her bidding all on their own...?

Catra's claws sink into the mattress as she glares back at the silent room. She refuses to close her eyes. Not this time...

Footsteps and voices make her ears flick. Catra quickly kicks the bag of ice off the bed so no one else will see.

A dozen fellow cadets file into the room, sighing and laughing and talking as they get ready to wind down and sleep. Catra scans the crowd, but Adora isn't among them.

At the very least, their presence prevents the shadows from getting any closer. Her ears tune into a familiar voice.

"Hey, Catra." Lohnie lifts her chin and grins from nearby. "So how'd your training with Adora go?"

Catra pulls her injured leg in close to her body to hide it.

"What do you think?" she goads, revealing her fangs. "We're on our way to becoming Force Commanders in no time. Don't have too much for dinner, Lohnie, cuz you're gonna have to eat my dust."

"Hah. We'll see about that."

The brief friendly exchange puts Catra at ease a bit more. She crosses her arms behind her head and leans back in a leisurely fashion, lounging on Adora's bed like she normally does so no one will suspect anything.

It's a few minutes later when Adora does return with a tray of food. Catra lets out a breath before calling out to her.

"Bout time! I'm starving, Adora!" She catches her eye, and in turn Adora immediately catches her drift of laying it on thick.

"Yeah, yeah," she says loudly. "I've got your dinner, so just chill out."

Lohnie looks up from where she's eating with Kyle and Rogelio on the floor.

"Yo, Adora. Why you serving Catra dinner in bed like she's some kinda rebellion princess?"

"Oh, y'know," Adora says quickly. "I lost a bet. Yup, I thought I could beat her in a sparring match today, but she wiped the floor with me."

"No kiddin'." Lohnie seems a bit surprised, but eventually turns back to the others and continues chatting with them.

Once everyone else has stopped looking at them, Adora sits down beside Catra.

"That worked, right?"

"Yeah, way to lie your ass off. You're the one who won the sparring match."

"But it doesn't count as a win if I actually hurt you."

"Of course it does! It just means I wasn't fast enough. So come on, eat your victory dinner." Catra nudges her elbow. Adora blushes a little and picks up her spoon to start on the hot soup. Catra breaks off a bit of bread and munches on that.

After a few minutes they switch, until there's nothing left.

Adora gets up and puts the empty tray on the pile at the corner of the room with the others to be collected and brought back to the mess hall in the morning. With everyone under the impression that Catra won a bet, no one questions why she doesn't get up and do things for herself.

Adora returns to her bed and sits down beside her again, subtly checking her over. Catra still can't move certain ways without flinching and hissing, but she doesn't seem to be in as much pain as before. Adora heaves a sigh and takes off her boots.

"We can shower in the morning. I don't feel like it right now." She lowers her voice. "Plus, maybe your ankle will be better after a night of rest."

As the other cadets prepare for bed as well, the talking dies down and the lights are shut off. Catra visibly jumps at the sudden darkness, but Adora doesn't notice.

But she feels it when Catra leans herself gently up against her side and lets her tail rest across Adora's lap. There's only a faint bit of hoary moonlight to see by, but Catra's blue and yellow eyes glint more brightly than even that.

Oddly enough, Catra's mischievousness might have brushed off on her, because Adora is feeling like playing a little game with her now. She pulls her legs up onto the bed and moves away from her partner with a groan.

"Come on, Catra. I'm not in the mood. I'm just tired and I wanna go to bed, okay?"

And normally, Catra would've just whined and complained until she got her way.

But now, with the room clogged in shadows, and Adora brushing her off, Catra's heart clenches. A sudden chill comes over her.

She remains frozen as Adora lies down and pulls the blankets up without her.

Catra swallows, breath quickening as her eyes flash through the darkness.

"Right... got it..."

Slowly, she crawls her way to the foot of the bed and curls up at Adora's feet without another word.

And Adora is shocked. Catra's never behaved like this before. That is to say, she's never submitted to Adora's wishes before. She'd always argue and bicker and fight back until she got what she wanted. She was usually more lively than this.

Adora waits for a few moments, listening to the snoring of her fellow cadets. She can feel Catra's weight settled at one side of the bed, huddled into the corner.

The few nights she did opt to sleep at the base were typically hotter summer nights when cuddling up directly was too uncomfortable. But tonight the air is cold and dry, and Catra has barely even allowed herself to make contact with Adora at all.

A few more minutes pass, and Adora waits for Catra to suddenly jump up and tackle her and wail complaints. But it doesn't happen.

That's when Adora realizes something must actually be bothering her - and seriously.

She sits up and lets the blankets fall away, looking down at the foot of the bed where Catra has bundled herself up and hidden her face. Adora whispers for her.

"Catra!"

She sees her tense up, but Catra says nothing. Adora grimaces.

/Crap. I really might've made her upset.../

"Catra? Catra, I was just joking! Come up here!"

She watches the ears perk up briefly before drooping again. Catra is still for a moment, and Adora swears she hears a sniffle.

At last, she slowly pushes herself up and turns around to face her. Her eyes are miserable and confused, and she looks like she's on the verge of tears.

Adora's never felt so guilty, touched, and loving all at the same time before.

"Oh, Catra... Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't think- Come here, you." Adora opens her arms. Catra sniffles one more time before warily crawling up to her. Adora pulls her in as tightly as she can. "I'm sorry. Seriously. Please don't cry."

"I-I'm not-" Catra tries her best to deny it, but her voice hitches and breaks. Adora runs both hands up and down her back.

"Oh my gosh, Catra..."

Adora chuckles a little in spite of the guilt. Catra always acts so tough and intense, but she breaks down crying if Adora won't let her snuggle.

Adora knows she can be sensitive, but she's never seen her like this before.

She continues rubbing her back, eventually letting her hands move up to the sides of Catra's face. She removes her headpiece and drops it onto the floor with her own boots, then gently curls her fingers through Catra's thick hair.

"I promise we'll cuddle every night from now on, okay? No matter what. I swear it, Catra."

Her words lift a heavy weight off of Catra's heart, but she doesn't want to let Adora know that.

"All right, geez," she grunts. "Don't make such a big deal out of it..."

"Catra, you're-" Adora nearly shrieks at first before she lowers her voice. "You're crying because I said we couldn't cuddle! Since when do you cry? Like, ever?"

She cradles Catra's head against her shoulder for a moment, feeling for herself that she's still a little tense. Adora eases back so she can glimpse her eyes.

"Does your ankle still hurt? Is... is something wrong, Catra...?"

And for a moment, Catra is about to cave.

She wants to tell her.

She wants to tell Adora all of the horrible things Shadow-Weaver's done, and is still doing to her...

But she can't.

Not only will it burden Adora, but it would definitely make her angry at Shadow-Weaver. Catra can't afford to let her get defiant with her, or else Shadow-Weaver will do the same awful things to Adora.

So as much as she wants to tell her the truth - as close as the words are to escaping on the tip of her tongue - Catra clamps down and swallows them back. She exhales slowly, letting Adora's warmth and scent envelope her before the shadows can even hope to touch make contact.

"I... guess I'm just tired." She has to leave it at that.

Adora gets an inkling there's more to it than that, but she doesn't want to push her, especially since she's already made her cry once tonight.

"You're super tired, and you're super tense. Come here." She holds up the blankets for her, and Catra slowly crawls in beneath them directly beside Adora. Adora puts a hand on her shoulder and coaxes her down onto her back. "Lie down. Just take it easy, okay?"

She lies down with her, turning onto her side to face Catra fully. She finds one of her hands and holds on, threading their fingers together. Her other hand comes to rest on Catra's stomach. She brushes her palm around in slow, steady circles.

She hears Catra let out a long sigh, and feels an ounce of the tension go with it. Adora rests her head on Catra's shoulder and stays as close as she can.

They've cuddled up plenty of times before, just about every night for years since Catra had decided to abandon her own top bunk.

But this is the first time it's ever been like this.

It's different from usual.

Catra usually falls asleep right away and would be snoring by now. But Adora can tell she's still struggling to relax. Her breathing is uneven and flustered, and her tail keeps squirming against Adora's hip.

/What's going on with her today...?/

With how worried she is about Catra now, Adora's also finding it difficult to relax. She nestles her face into Catra's shoulder and sighs, letting her fingers curl over her partner's stomach.

That's when she hears it:

"Prrbt-"

Adora freezes and lifts her head.

"What was that?"

Catra snorts.

"What was what?"

"That noise you just made."

"N-Noise? What noise? Are you hearing things? I think you're hearing things. Let's just go to bed." She tries to turn over, but Adora holds her in place.

"Oh, no you don't. Not until you tell me what that noise was."

"Adora, it's nothing!" she hisses. "Now just shut up and-"

"Are-? Are you-?"

"Adora!"

"Ticklish?!" Adora blurts the word out loud before quickly slapping her palm over her mouth. Catra hisses again, more fiercely this time, and tries even harder to get away from her. But Adora locks both arms around her now. "Oh my gosh! How did I never find this out before? This is amazing!"

"Adora, shut the hell up! Let go of me!"

"Oh, I don't think so."

It's very difficult for them to try and keep their voices down with so much amusement and frustration happening all at once now. Catra is trying to struggle away as quietly as possible so they don't wake anyone else up, and Adora is trying to quietly restrain her.

Catra keeps hissing and Adora keeps chuckling.

"Oh my gosh," she mumbles. "Catra, you're- you're ticklish."

"I am not! Adora, I swear I'm gonna- hya!"

Adora pokes her stomach just at the right time, and Catra's heated threat ends up as a high-pitched yelp. Adora grins stupidly, bigger than ever before.

"Catra, that's so cute!"

"Like hell it is! Get off!"

"Not until you relax!"

Adora makes her move and pounces in the darkness, tackling the nocturnal predator in her own habitat. She wrestles Catra down and pins her to the bed, smirking at her in the moonlight. Catra glares back furiously, tail lashing.

"Adora, I swear-"

"Now, now, Catra, don't be too loud or else you'll wake everyone up!"

She dives in as any Force cadet should; without mercy.

Catra makes a sound that's part whispered hiss, screech, and yowl all at once as Adora begins wiggling her fingers all up and down her sides. She straddles her waist to prevent her from slipping away and uses gravity to her advantage to keep her weight on top.

Catra writhes and thrashes beneath her, trying to flip over and turn herself onto her stomach to protect herself, but it's no use. She swipes and paws at Adora, making consternated growls and whimpers and a plethora of other adorable noises.

"Ah-Adora-!" She tries to spit out her name angrily, but there's no force behind it now. Her voice trembles and threatens to break, but Catra does her damnedest to swallow it back and keep herself together. "I'm gonna- ah-! Damn it-! G-Get off me-"

Adora knows she isn't being fair, but for once she doesn't care. Any tired grogginess that might've been seeping in earlier now completely evaporates as her playful fighting spirit is ignited. She's never gotten a reaction like this out of Catra before; she'd somehow never even known she was ticklish.

"What a waste-" she grunts. "I could've been seeing you like this every night~"

"Adora-" The growl comes up from the back of Catra's throat as she tries to grab at her collar. But Adora just tickles her exposed side and makes her shriek again. "Hey! Cheater!"

"All's fair in love and war, Catra!"

"Th-This is neither! This is betrayal!"

"Aw, poor Catra~" Adora runs her fingers up her partner's stomach again, feeling her jolt.

"Adora-"

"Sorry, Catra. I can't hear you over the sound of me winning."

And win she does. She doesn't relent until she gets what she wants. Catra may be stubborn, but Adora is equally so.

Though Catra holds it in for a lot longer than Adora expected, she does eventually cave. After one more good brush of Adora's nails across her side, Catra bursts out into quiet laughter. Any self control she has left has gone solely to forcing her voice to stay as low as possible.

But the laugh is inevitable and unstoppable.

It's a wheezing, rasping chuckle, one Adora would expect from Catra.

But it's also incredibly sweet and beautiful.

It makes Adora's heart soar.

She's heard Catra guffaw at jokes at the lunch table or in the locker room before, heard her snort and chortle every now and again along with some snide remark.

But this is something else entirely.

She's never seen or heard Catra laugh her heart out like this so purely before. When she's not trying to hold it all back and deny her own feelings, it makes her all the more charming.

It just makes Adora love her even more than she already had.

Her favorite part by far is when Catra laughs out Adora's name between chuckles as she feebly tries to swat her away.

"Adora... A-Adoraaah-"

Adora basks in the cool moonlight and in the sound of her partner's breathless voice. She continues tickling her for a while longer, just because she can.

"See? You really need to lighten up, Catra."

"Adora... I'm gonna... get you for this, you-"

Adora pokes her again. Catra squeaks.

"Yeah, I know you will," Adora says. "But right now I'm calling the shots."

"Wh-Why you-"

Catra tries to surge up at her and almost knocks her off as planned. But Adora grabs her wrist and wrestles her back down.

Had Catra not been drained of energy due to the ambush, she definitely would have won, but for now Adora relishes her little victories. She gets in a few more good blows, earning a few more stifled squeals and laughs from Catra in response.

Catra really does her best to fight back and threaten her, letting all of her frustration fuel her. But none of it sounds very convincing when it's sprinkled with throaty giggles.

Adora just counts her blessings that no one else has woken up from all of their commotion.

By now though, she can tell Catra has just about had enough, because she's laughing too hard to even try to counter. Adora wiggles her fingers over her stomach a few more times before accepting her triumph and relinquishing her grip on her. She can't wipe the smile off her face as she sits on Catra's lap, loosening her hold on her wrists little by little.

Catra is a wheezing, breathless mess of tangled hair and fluffed-up fur beneath her. Her head is turned to one side and her eyes are squeezed shut, though Adora can see small tears have formed at the corners. Her lips are curved up into a smile that reveals her fangs, but she's too exhausted now to put them to good use, either physically or verbally.

Adora is panting a little bit too after the struggle, but even long after she's recovered Catra is still a gasping mess. Adora is merciful enough to let her regain some composure.

"See?" she smirks. "Aren't you much less tense now, Catra? I told you I could help, didn't I?"

Catra weakly turns her head and cracks open her eyes, but the tears don't fall. Blue and yellow glint dangerously in the moonlight.

"You... are gonna get it, Adora-"

She pushes herself up in one switch motion and flips Adora off herself, shoving her down into the bed. Adora wheezes; she knows she's in for it now.

"Crap-"

"Say your freaking prayers."

Catra has never tickled anyone before. The thought's never even crossed her mind, not even with Adora.

So it's no surprise that in spite of her dangerous threats, she's terrible at it.

She tries to copy what Adora had done to her, but she only gets one swipe in as she grips her arm before she accidentally ends up scratching her wrist. Adora barely winces, but Catra's tough-girl persona disappears in a split second. She gasps and quickly presses her palm over the cut.

"S-Sorry! I didn't-"

And her change in personality from cut-throat predator to concerned whimpering ally is just too touching, too earnest. Adora can't help but giggle.

Catra's ears go flat instantly. She throws her head back before bashing her forehead against Adora's.

"Hey! Why are you laughing?!"

"Ow... hee hee, sorry. Catra, you're just too cute."

"Shut up! A-Are you bleeding?"

"It's fine, Catra. But if you really wanna make it up to me-"

With an expert twist of her body, Adora lifts her leg and knocks Catra right off of her again, trapping her back into the same position from earlier. Catra tries to dissuade her.

"Adora-"

"You're still so tense, Catra. Lighten up!"

And she commences her tickle attack all over again.

Catra can't even find the strength to resist, let alone retaliate. She just does everything she can not to be too loud, though she really does try her best to roll Adora off the bed.

"No fair! Cheater!" she spits. "I can't even fight back without shredding you-"

"Guess it's my win then!"

Adora is just as ruthless with round two, tickling Catra anywhere she can, in any way she can. It really is a miracle their fighting doesn't wake anyone else up.

Catra breaks much more quickly this time around, and is reduced to a rasping, laughing puddle in only seconds. Adora soaks it all in, glad to see her smiling after how upset she'd been earlier that day.

But she's already had her fun by now. She doesn't want to push Catra to far past the point of exhaustion. So with one last tickle, she finally withdraws her hands and holds them up.

"All right. I'm done. I swear."

To prove her words, she slips off of Catra and plops down beside her in the tangle of blankets.

Catra is shuddering in the aftermath now. Little chuckles and growls keep slipping out in between the ragged breaths, and when Adora listens closely she can hear the faint, choppy rumbles of a purr as well.

Catra tries to swallow the embarrassing sounds down, but they keep coming back up anyway. She eventually gives up and just lies there, panting like a half-drowned dog. She can only turn her face and glare piercing daggers at her partner.

Adora grins.

"Hey, I'm sorry, okay? But this was the quickest way to get you to relax a bit. And also it was really fun. And you were really cute-"

"Adora-"

"Oh, come on! Just forgive me and let's go to bed now, okay? For real."

"I... am gonna get you back for this... maybe not tonight, or tomorrow night, but I swear it Adora-"

"Right, and when you do I'll accept it, okay? But for now it's bedtime." Adora pulls the blanket up over them both again, partially to make Catra feel inclined to rest, and partially to prevent her from counter-attacking again.

But Catra seems too exhausted to care about revenge right now. She just glares at Adora a moment longer before letting out a long, grumbling sigh.

"If you tickle me one more time, I swear-"

"I won't! I promise!" Adora wiggles closer and hugs her.

Catra growls softly, but doesn't have the will to push her off anymore.

Adora relishes her victory a little longer, resting her head on Catra's chest. She can hear her heart drumming heavily, and beneath that is a fainter, gravely purr. Adora just smiles and smiles, but stops herself from rubbing it in too much. Instead, she tries to make peace.

"Thanks for not shredding me when you totally could have."

"Yeah, yeah..." Catra huffs, as if Adora doesn't know she's actually purring.

Adora hums to accompany Catra's purr, letting the little vibrations dance together across her chest. After a few minutes, Catra finally gets her breathing back under control. Adora listens as her pulse begins to slow down and settle back into a steadier rhythm. She lifts her head a little to look up at her.

"Are you relaxed now?"

Catra snarls and looks away.

"Shut up and go to sleep."

And yet in contrast to her sharp words, her hands curl softly over Adora's back and through her hair. She heaves a sigh and the purr comes to a halt. Adora hugs her a little closer.

"Catra? Is something wrong...?"

Another huff. Then-

"It's not fair..."

"Hm?"

"I said it's not fair!" she snaps. "That you can make me laugh like that... but I can't..."

Adora can't see her face, but she can practically hear the blush in her voice, if that's even possible. She can feel Catra curling her claws through her hair gently, clearly frustrated that she can't touch Adora like Adora can touch her - without hurting her.

Adora's heart swells with fondness and affection. Even after all she'd done to her - even after Catra's had such a rough day - she's still thinking about returning the favor and making Adora happy.

Adora pushes herself up onto her elbows and brushes her palm against Catra's cheek.

Catra turns her head slowly, leaning into her touch. Her eyes glow in the darkness, but when she sees Adora's glimmering in silver moonlight, her heart skips.

Adora leans down, presses a soft kiss to her forehead, and holds it there.

"Thanks, Catra. But I'm plenty happy with you, even if you don't tickle me."

Catra is at a loss for words. Her face is heating up at an alarming rate.

"Fine! Whatever! Now shut up and go to bed!"

Adora laughs, dipping down to nuzzle her nose briefly.

"All right. Let's get some rest."

When she next rests her head against Catra's chest, her pulse is a little quicker and her purr is a little louder. She can feel Catra's hands idling on her back and shoulders, feel her claws kneading very carefully into her clothes.

At last everything begins to slow down for the both of them.

Knowing that Catra is comfortable and happy is what allows Adora to finally settle enough to welcome some rest. She lets the combined lull of Catra's heartbeat, breathing, and purr fill her head and sing her to sleep...

. . .

Catra tries to open her eyes, but she can't even be sure if she manages the feat or not.

Everything is dark no matter what she does.

And not just the darkness of the dorm room in the middle of the night.

This is a different kind of dark.

This is the kind of pitch-blackness that exists within the shadows of the shadows on a moonless midnight.

It's cold. She doesn't dare speak.

Because she knows she isn't alone.

She doesn't move either. She just tries to make sense of where her body is and holds it still, hugging herself so tightly in her terror that her claws sink in. There's no pain, but she wishes there were. She wishes she could feel something other than this gripping, crushing fear. Anything at all...

She stays for what feels like hours in that darkness, possibly even days. She can't tell.

She can sense someone else's presence here, watching her, but it isn't who she wants it to be.

The tears have fallen in silence all this time, but now she tries to open her mouth, in hopes that saying her name might bring her to Catra somehow.

"Ah... Adora...?"

She lifts her head and tries to look, but finds nothing but darkness. But the ears that have been pressed hard down against her scalp now flick at a soft sound.

It isn't threatening like she thought. Instead it's small, innocent.

Laughter.

She recognizes Adora's voice right away, although it's a bit higher-pitched, and even Catra's own laughter joins in.

She can see them now; herself and Adora, young children running through the darkness, holding hands and giggling at whatever harmless mischief they'd just caused.

Catra raises her head slowly as the two girls run towards her. She opens her mouth again to call out.

"Adora-"

But it isn't her voice that speaks. It's a deeper one, a menacing one, one that's been haunting Catra for as long as she could remember.

Shadow-Weaver's cruel laughter drowns out the carefree giggles of the young girls, and the shadows swallow them before Catra's eyes.

"No!"

She cries out, and her voice is her own this time. But the savage laughter only grows louder and louder.

Catra sees herself again with Adora, playing some stupid game they'd invented in their boredom, a game Catra had come to love over the years of her childhood because it meant being with Adora.

And then it's gone.

"No..."

She watches them training together, sparring and defeating other cadets, rising up the ranks-

And it's gone.

"No-"

She watches them curling up together at night, playfully bickering in the mornings, laughing and talking and living-

Gone.

"No-!"

She screams, but she can't even hear her own voice anymore.

Only that cruel laughter remains as it plucks the precious memories from her mind one by one.

Until there's nothing left at all.

. . .

Adora wakes from a peacful sleep due to a sharp, sudden pain. As her mind comes back to her, she recalls she's asleep with Catra, so the pain in her shoulders is easily identifiable.

But not so easily understandable.

Her claws have sunken in deep through Adora's clothing, deep enough to pierce her skin. Adora tries to wriggle herself free, but Catra's grip is so tight she can't even do that.

"Ow, Catra-"

Adora opens her eyes in the weak grey moonlight and tries to look up.

That's when she feels her shaking. Not only the hands on Adora's back, but Catra's whole body. In spite of being under the blankets and so close to Adora, Catra is trembling as though braving a blizzard. Her breathing is fast and shallow, and Adora can hear whimpers of her voice tumbling out. She can feel Catra's heart as well. It's hard, fast, and almost painful to listen to. It thunders with fear, reverberates throughout her body so intensely that Adora feels instantly sick with concern for her.

"Catra...?" She keeps her voice quiet at first, wanting to wake but not startle her.

But Catra's claws only sink more deeply into her flesh, her pulse pounds harder, and the terrified noises she keeps making are more than enough to break Adora's heart. She reaches a hand up to Catra's face and cups her cheek with care and fondness, then speaks a bit louder.

"Catra?" Adora leans down to kiss her forehead again. "Wake up. Please..."

She waits, still wincing a little at the pain in her back. But what hurts worst of all is feeling Catra shaking so violently, feeling her heart slamming up against her chest as though it's about to burst out.

She can't take it. Adora holds both sides of Catra's face now and gives a soft shout.

"Catra!"

"Haa-!" She makes a strangled, panic-stricken sound as her chest heaves with a gasp. Her arms pour every ounce of strength into her grip on Adora, pulling her down so strongly Adora has no hope of getting free. Not that she wants to. Not when Catra is this frightened.

"Catra!" she whimpers. "Catra, it's okay-"

"N-No-!"

"It's me!" Adora caresses her friend's tearstained cheeks with slow, soothing strokes of her fingers to contrast the pounding turmoil in Catra's chest.

At last, Catra's mis-matched eyes fly open. Fresh tears dribble down and her claws sink in deeper.

"A-Adora-"

"Yes," she whispers. "It's all right, Catra. It was just a dream. I'm here."

Catra's eyes are wild in terror as they flash around the room. Her body is completely frozen, save for the uncontrollable shuddering. Her breathing is still out of control, and her pulse is still rapid. She looks like she's about to bolt and keep running until she can't anymore.

Adora combats her fear with calmness, gentleness, and love. She brushes her fingertips gingerly through her thick messy hair.

"Hey," she murmurs. "It's okay. Just take it easy-"

"N-No!" Catra screeches in a voice so broken it hardly comes out at all. "N-No, Adora... I-I can't remember... she..."

"What?" Adora brushes a few more of her tears away, but new ones keep coming. "What can't you remember? The time we called Octavia a stupid-face? Or the time we tricked Kyle into walking into one of his own booby traps and laughed so hard we couldn't breathe? Or the time we put a dent in the wall because we were wrestling too hard and blamed it on a bot and it actually worked?"

As she lists off the memories one by one, Catra seems to calm down, little by little. Adora keeps going.

"Then there was the time we snuck out at night and just played until dawn. The times I taught you how to swim. The times I pestered you to dry your hair before bed so you wouldn't catch a cold. The time you actually caught one and I had to stay in bed with you all day until you felt better. The time I caught a cold and you made fun of me for half an hour before bringing me soup and taking care of me for hours. The time we became official cadets of the Horde. The time we won the duos matches..."

As she recounts them all, she can feel Catra's shaking fingers gradually loosen their grip, and her labored, rasping breaths begin to fan out. Adora lets one hand travel back through Catra's hair to her trembling ear and begin to rub the fur gently.

"Do you remember all that, Catra? Cuz I could go on till sunrise."

Catra sniffles, whimpers, and swallows thickly. Her heart is still a frantic jumble. But eventually her eyes stop flitting around the room and just stay focused on Adora's. She manages a small nod.

"Yeah... I... I remember..." She blinks, and more tears fall. "She... She didn't take them..."

Adora hugs herself to Catra briefly, running her fingers through the thick mane of hair.

"What do you mean, Catra? Are you talking about... Shadow-Weaver?"

The second she speaks the name, Catra confirms Adora's theory with a sharp gasp and a whimper. Her claws dig in again, only this time she realizes they're in Adora's skin.

"S-Sorry-!" Frantically, she yanks her hands away, but Adora never lets her go.

"Hey-" She curls both arms around her sobbing partner. Catra shakes her head, grabbing onto her more gently, but just as desperately.

"Sorry... I didn't-"

"Hey..." Adora says it again, in earnest, cupping Catra's cheek. She rests their foreheads together, trying to let her calmer emotions rub off on Catra's frantic ones. She lets their noses brush and slowly lowers herself over her, letting the pressure of her weight provide a sense of security.

Catra is still shivering, still choking back her sobs softly. Her heart is still pounding in some deep-rooted fear, something Adora berates herself for not having realized a long time ago. She just holds her close and whispers to her.

"Catra... it's okay. You didn't hurt me, but... but she hurt you, didn't she...?"

Catra sobs again and clings to her like a frightened child, as though she were a decade younger again. Adora gives her a moment, gently settling her weight over Catra's heaving chest to ground her.

"What... What did she do to you, Catra...? Please, you have to tell me. I wanna help..."

She feels her own warm tears brimming up now at seeing Catra in so much pain. Adora stays close, trying to let her realize this isn't just a dream, that she's really here for her in this moment. Catra's claws contract and curl into her clothes meekly, her heart continues trembling, and the devastating rasps of pain persist. But eventually she finds her voice again, small and scared as it may be.

"She... She took one," Catra croaks. "She erased one of my memories..."

Adora feels her heart twist deep in her chest. She'd had an inkling it could've been something like that, but she'd really really hoped to be wrong. The fact that she wasn't fills her with guilt, sadness, and rage.

"Why...?" she manages through grit teeth. "Why would she do that-?"

But she realizes the anger she feels toward Shadow-Weaver right now won't help Catra in any way. So she calms herself, inhales slowly, and continues petting her hands through her partner's hair.

Catra's claws maintain their purchase on her back, as if terrified at the thought of letting her go.

"I don't know..." she whispers. "Usually it's just threats... but today... it was the first time she ever-" Her eyes flutter open for a second, and Adora sees nothing but fear and torment in them. "She took away a part of me, Adora. I lost... a piece of myself..."

The tears Catra sheds keep coming as if a barricade has been lifted. It's as though everything she's been keeping secret locked away in the deepest corners of her heart are finally allowed into the light.

Adora's anger fades to the back of her conscience for now as she pulls her dear friend close to her.
"Oh, Catra... I'm... I'm so sorry..." She feels there's nothing more she can do for her. At least not right now. Adora just holds her tightly, peppering tiny little kisses across her face as she dries her many tears.

"I'm so sorry... but thank you for telling me." She presses her forehead to Catra's once again. "Because I swear it, Catra. I'm not gonna let her hurt you anymore. I'll do everything I can..."

Catra blinks her eyes open in spite of more tears falling. Her eyes are still ridden with fear, but now a small spark of hope is ignited.

"You promise...?"

Adora smiles tenderly. She rests her hand on Catra's shoulder and slowly slides down to her elbow and forearm, until she's pulled Catra's quivering hand into her own. She takes Catra's pinkie and curls her own around it.

"I promise," she whispers. "I'm gonna do everything within my power to make sure we both get out of here one day, whether it's as Force Captains or runaways." She dips down and holds another chaste little kiss to Catra's forehead. "We're so close, Catra. We're right here on the edge of greatness. Just a little further, and then we'll be free of all this. We'll do whatever we want. Just the two of us, together."

Catra draws in a deep, shaking breath beneath her.

"Adora..."

"Remember," Adora murmurs, nuzzling the soft fur of her ear. "It doesn't matter what they do to us. So long as we have each other, we'll find a way through it. And you'll always have me, Catra. No matter what."

She traces her fingertips through Catra's hair again, letting them scratch gently at the base of her ears. She feels a familiar tail wrap around her waist beneath the blankets. Adora smiles and gazes deeply into her eyes.

"Even if Shadow-Weaver took your memories, we'll just make new ones. Better ones. But I swear to you Catra, I won't let her hurt you anymore. I... I swear it..."

Adora blinks, and two tears fall down to land on Catra's cheeks. She closes her eyes and tries to get ahold of herself, trying to be strong now when Catra needs her...

But then she feels a warm hand gliding over her cheek. The claws are careful and soft as Catra brushes Adora's tears away for her too.

"Me too," Catra murmurs. "I've got your back, Adora. I'll do whatever it takes to get us out of this place..."

Adora smiles, and carefully lies herself down over Catra.

"Thanks, partner."

Catra hugs her back again, letting their combined weight and body heat provide the comfort they both need now. Adora kisses her forehead one last time before resting her head on Catra's chest again. Her pulse finally begins to slow down as the sobbing quells. Her breathing evens out and steadies, and the shivering dies away.

"You can tell me," Adora whispers. "Catra, you can tell me anything, okay? You don't have to keep it all a secret. I'm here for you."

She hears Catra exhale another long breath. Part of her expects a feisty, snide remark like always. But for once, Catra is honest with her.

"Thanks, Adora..."

Adora smiles again.

"Don't mention it, partner."

She waits for a moment, listening to the beat of Catra's heart. The terror finally seems to have dissipated for now, but she just wants to make sure.

"You okay, Catra...?"

Another sigh, but this time she hears the beginnings of a faint purr.

"Yeah. Guess so..."

"I'm glad. Really glad." Adora nestles closer, as close as physics allow. "Goodnight, Catra."

The purr grows a little louder.

"Night, Adora."

It only takes a few moments for Catra to fall back asleep. Adora can tell by the way everything in her body slows down, but only the tiny rolling purr persists.

Adora doesn't think she'll have any more nightmares again tonight. But just to make sure, she stays awake a while longer, savoring the sound of Catra's heart. It's damaged, and a little tired, but still strong and pure. She knows it.

She wants to protect her. More than anything else in the world.

/And I will, she tells herself. No matter what it takes./

Because one day they're going to get out of this place, and just run until there's no one left chasing them.

But until then, they'd have to stay strong, and stay together.

---------------

A/N: Hi okay let's not talk about how all of these promises are later broken as soon as the series happens. I actually hate myself for doing this jskdfhdksa

On another note though, I just love the whole "Hey Adora" thing but imagine... Adora saying "Hey" to Catra as well. Sometimes playfully or in mild aggravation. And then other times softly, tenderly, to help Catra calm down from her terrors, to ground her and steady her. Cuz gosh darn I'm here for that. Those quiet little "Hey, just look at me, don't worry about anything else, I'm here," as she entwines their fingers together... ughgh

Probably leaving this here as a long roller coaster of a oneshot. I wanted my typical tickle fight chapter along with the nightmare comforting so there you have it.