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INDOXXI
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Welcome to the Villa Capri.

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Located in the heart of the desert

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is the resort community
that takes you to paradise.

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You've worked hard all of your life,

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and now...

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No!

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That son of a bitch

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is in Palm Springs.

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He's basking
in the sun and playing golf.

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While my husband
is drinking toilet wine in supermax!

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Now the only thing that I want
from you for Christmas

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is that rat's head in a box!

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And make it look like it's an accident.

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♪ A few more days till Christmas ♪

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♪ My favorite time of year ♪

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♪ If we're lucky we'll see Santa ♪

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♪ Rudolph and his eight reindeer ♪

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♪ The snow keeps on fallin' ♪

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♪ Sleddin' down the hill ♪

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♪ Frosty's frozen on the lawn ♪

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♪ Countin' down the days until ♪

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♪ We gather 'round decorate the tree ♪

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♪ Singin' holiday songs ♪

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♪ Spices fill the air ♪

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♪ Smell of cookies everywhere ♪

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- Hi, Duke.
- Hey.

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♪ A few more days to Christmas ♪

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♪ The very best time of year ♪

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♪ Firelight is glowing ♪

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♪ On everything we hold dear ♪

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♪ Just a few more days till Christmas ♪

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♪ A few more days ♪
♪ Till Christmas is here ♪

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- Hi.
- Thank you.

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Santa!

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Oh! You're very generous, Duke.

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Could I get you to sign
this receipt for me?

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Sure thing. You just bought your way off

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- the naughty list.
- Pleasure.

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♪ Rudolph and his eight reindeer ♪

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♪ Firelight is glowing ♪

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♪ On everything we hold dear ♪

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♪ Just a few more days till Christmas ♪

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♪ A few more days till Christmas ♪

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- Hey boss!
- Great job, guys. Very festive.

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- Excuse me. This is Mr. Diver's spot.
- Perfect!

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Mr. Diver make you wear those clothes?

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Shine it up for me, Elf.

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- Nice tree.
- Who is that in my parking spot?

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Oh, that's a new resident,
Leo McKay.

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Yeah, he just checked in
last night and he's actually very...

51
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He's got a ten-gallon hat
on a five-gallon head.

52
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Paid all cash.

53
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Cash?

54
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Well...

55
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Let's invite him to my private poker game.

56
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You got it.

57
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I'll show him who's boss.

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- In the nicest way.
- Of course.

59
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- It's crooked.
- Hm?

60
00:05:18,665 --> 00:05:23,057
- And there's a bald spot.
- So what? A lot of trees have flaws.

61
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A lot of people have flaws.

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You can put the bad side
of a tree against the wall.

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What do you do
with the bad side of people?

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- That's deep.
- Write it down.

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Greetings, my darling.

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Be a dear and get 5,000
out of petty cash for me.

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Not a problem.

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Got some stuff for you to sign here, sir.

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Did you know that the builders
of the great cathedrals of Europe

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would leave a small flaw
in the stone somewhere

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00:05:48,865 --> 00:05:51,175
just to acknowledge
that only God is perfect?

72
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Where do you learn all this stuff?

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College of life, my boy.

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Well, we've got
the gardener's Christmas bonus,

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00:05:56,346 --> 00:05:57,905
the extra security cameras for your villa,

76
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the bonus you asked me
to pay out to the entire staff,

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live animals for the nativity scene.
The camels were a little expensive.

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You can't a nativity without camels.

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The Wise Men came from the East.

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Got to give them respect.

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Oh, and we have a letter
from the Rotary Club

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confirming your acceptance

83
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- of Man of the Year Honors...
- I can't accept. Can't accept.

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I'm uncomfortable in the limelight.

85
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You seem comfortable in the limelight.

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My golf clubs! Oh, perfect, perfect!

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00:06:21,906 --> 00:06:24,899
So, I had them close the face
on the driver by a degree and a half.

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You've been slicing a little recently.
Should take care of it.

89
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Good, good, good.

90
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I think I'll just run on out to the range
and let the big dogs eat.

91
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Oh, Duke!

92
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Hm?

93
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- Five thou. Mm-hm.
- Thank you, my darlin'.

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Duke, you checkin' me out?

95
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Every delicious inch.

96
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That's a nice tree you got this year.

97
00:06:47,827 --> 00:06:48,738
Well, thank you,

98
00:06:48,827 --> 00:06:50,784
but I'm a little concerned
that some of the residents

99
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might not like a flocked tree.

100
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Well, you know me, Duke.

101
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I like a nice flockin' from time to time.

102
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A bit of Henkell's Trocken
for my darlin'?

103
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Whatever.

104
00:07:05,827 --> 00:07:09,616
It's a little before
my bedtime, but...

105
00:07:09,947 --> 00:07:14,226
Aw, it's always your bedtime, Duke.

106
00:07:14,307 --> 00:07:16,867
But darlin', you know a man's nature
is a man's...

107
00:07:21,867 --> 00:07:26,384
Hey, why don't I go and enhance
the fireplace in the boudoir.

108
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Would you like that?

109
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- Yeah, I would.
- Okay!

110
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Hope you don't mind.
I let myself in.

111
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Pour moi?

112
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Uh... of course!

113
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What is the color of that silk
against your skin?

114
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There's a painting by Caravaggio.
You could have been...

115
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It's plum.

116
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And you're my plum.

117
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Oh!

118
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Listen, darling, I... I'm just gonna go
and... lock up, turn out all the lights,

119
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and come back
and submit to your every whim.

120
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My every whim.

121
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Oh... Hurry back.

122
00:08:23,908 --> 00:08:27,697
Uh... Marguerite darlin',
I... I think the...

123
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Zoloft and the Lipitor
are kicking in a little early on me.

124
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I... I feel woozy.

125
00:08:34,389 --> 00:08:35,869
- Hold on a minute.
- What?

126
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Have you got
another woman in there?

127
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Oh, Marguerite... you hurt me
with your accusation.

128
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You twist the knife. The wound bleeds.

129
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You... you get such pleasure
out... out of my discomfort.

130
00:08:50,989 --> 00:08:52,821
- I... I just don't...
- Hold on a second, mister.

131
00:08:53,909 --> 00:08:55,582
You didn't answer my question.

132
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Darling, trust me...

133
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I speak from the heart when I say...

134
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Yes, there's a woman in the bedroom.

135
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All right. Well...

136
00:09:09,949 --> 00:09:14,865
I know I'm not your one and only,
and we've got a grown-up relationship.

137
00:09:14,949 --> 00:09:16,906
- Yes.
- So, I'll...

138
00:09:17,989 --> 00:09:19,059
Well, I'll just say good night.

139
00:09:21,469 --> 00:09:24,224
- I'm fine.
- N... no! Let me, let me...

140
00:09:24,310 --> 00:09:26,666
- let me walk you to your door, okay?
- Mm-hm.

141
00:09:27,630 --> 00:09:30,668
In your own way, Duke,
you are strangely chivalrous.

142
00:09:30,790 --> 00:09:33,464
Merci beaucoup.

143
00:09:33,550 --> 00:09:35,985
Still a cat,
of course, but you got rules.

144
00:09:36,070 --> 00:09:38,630
Aw, I consider myself a gentleman.

145
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And so, "Good night. Good night.
Parting is such sweet sorrow.

146
00:09:48,510 --> 00:09:51,184
I shall say good night
till it be 'morrow."

147
00:09:51,590 --> 00:09:54,628
Can I quote you on that?

148
00:09:54,710 --> 00:09:56,224
Well, you be my guest, Romeo.

149
00:09:56,990 --> 00:10:00,381
Actually, I'm... I'm surprised you even
considered a little romance tonight

150
00:10:00,470 --> 00:10:01,540
given the circumstances.

151
00:10:02,350 --> 00:10:03,261
Circumstances?

152
00:10:03,590 --> 00:10:04,580
Well, this is your poker night.

153
00:10:06,070 --> 00:10:06,981
Ciao.

154
00:10:08,110 --> 00:10:10,579
Uh... poker?

155
00:10:12,510 --> 00:10:13,387
Poker!

156
00:10:23,231 --> 00:10:26,349
I got the feeling that the Duke

157
00:10:26,471 --> 00:10:30,385
needed a little... Roberta.

158
00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:34,146
Uh, yes.

159
00:10:34,271 --> 00:10:37,150
The Duke... the Duke always needs
a little Roberta.

160
00:10:38,391 --> 00:10:43,307
Well, from the way you just said it,
it sounds like a "not tonight".

161
00:10:44,031 --> 00:10:49,151
Well, I have a meeting
that requires urgent attention, darling.

162
00:10:49,231 --> 00:10:51,348
- At night?
- It's morning in China.

163
00:10:55,831 --> 00:10:59,188
Uh, well, good night, good night, darling.
Parting is such sweet sorrow.

164
00:10:59,271 --> 00:11:05,302
"A horse, a horse.
My kingdom for a horse."

165
00:11:05,991 --> 00:11:08,267
Mm-hm.

166
00:11:17,912 --> 00:11:20,427
So, a guy comes home from the doctor's.

167
00:11:20,512 --> 00:11:23,471
He tells his wife,
"Honey, I got terrible news."

168
00:11:23,552 --> 00:11:24,383
Terrible news.

169
00:11:24,472 --> 00:11:26,862
"Doctor says, I only got
12 hours to live."

170
00:11:26,992 --> 00:11:29,461
- Uh-huh.
- Wife says, "Oh dear, that's terrible.

171
00:11:29,552 --> 00:11:32,909
That's terrible. I'll do anything for you.
Whatever you want."

172
00:11:32,992 --> 00:11:37,384
And he says, "I want to have wild sex
with you all night long."

173
00:11:38,152 --> 00:11:39,381
And she looks at him and says,

174
00:11:39,472 --> 00:11:41,748
"Easy for you to say. You don't have
to get up in the morning."

175
00:11:41,832 --> 00:11:45,792
That's funny! That's very funny!

176
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:48,023
All right. Who's betting?
Who's betting? Who's betting?

177
00:11:48,112 --> 00:11:52,425
It's me, and I'm goin' in for big money.
'cause I wanna take everything you got.

178
00:11:52,512 --> 00:11:54,868
I'll see your 100 and raise you two.

179
00:11:54,952 --> 00:11:57,626
That' a 100 bucks!

180
00:11:57,712 --> 00:11:59,385
I'll see you, I'll see you.

181
00:11:59,472 --> 00:12:01,145
I heard this is where the action's at.

182
00:12:01,232 --> 00:12:02,144
Who the hell are you?

183
00:12:02,233 --> 00:12:04,589
I'm Leo McKay. I'm moving into um...

184
00:12:04,673 --> 00:12:06,585
Villa 71. Welcome, neighbor.

185
00:12:06,673 --> 00:12:07,584
Hi.

186
00:12:08,473 --> 00:12:11,784
I'm Duke Diver, resident manager
of this little corner of paradise.

187
00:12:11,913 --> 00:12:15,111
- These are my cronies.
- Duke's a legend.

188
00:12:15,193 --> 00:12:16,593
Legends ain't what they used to be,
are they?

189
00:12:16,673 --> 00:12:18,107
Yeah, but you don't know Duke.

190
00:12:18,193 --> 00:12:20,230
He's a resident champion
of everything around here.

191
00:12:20,313 --> 00:12:21,667
Guys, you're embarrassing me.

192
00:12:21,953 --> 00:12:24,673
I'm just a country boy
tryin' to fade into the sunset

193
00:12:24,753 --> 00:12:25,869
with smile on my face.

194
00:12:25,953 --> 00:12:26,989
Ain't we all?

195
00:12:27,073 --> 00:12:29,463
But I gotta warn you, cousin,
we play for real money here.

196
00:12:29,553 --> 00:12:31,943
Well, I'll try to keep up.

197
00:12:32,713 --> 00:12:34,625
- Oh.
- Holy shit... That's a wad, man!

198
00:12:36,673 --> 00:12:37,993
Shit just got real up in here!

199
00:12:38,073 --> 00:12:40,224
That's my alimony, I can't, man,
this is two months...

200
00:12:40,313 --> 00:12:41,110
Okay.

201
00:12:41,233 --> 00:12:42,383
Now, where you from, Leo?

202
00:12:42,713 --> 00:12:46,627
I'm a citizen of the world.
Mogadishu, Jakarta, Kabul.

203
00:12:47,353 --> 00:12:48,833
All the vacation spots.

204
00:12:49,313 --> 00:12:51,953
- Military?
- No. Ex-military.

205
00:12:52,033 --> 00:12:54,184
Currently entrepreneur.

206
00:12:54,714 --> 00:12:57,149
International trade.
I buy stuff, sell stuff.

207
00:12:57,234 --> 00:12:58,145
Like?

208
00:12:58,514 --> 00:13:02,030
Gas, guns, oil, trains, trucks.
Big stuff. I like big stuff.

209
00:13:05,394 --> 00:13:06,908
And a man of mystery.

210
00:13:09,714 --> 00:13:10,864
How about we play some cards?

211
00:13:11,274 --> 00:13:12,788
What's your game, cousin?

212
00:13:12,874 --> 00:13:17,027
You like Five Card Draw, Stud,
Omaha, Texas Hold 'Em?

213
00:13:17,114 --> 00:13:18,025
Texas will do.

214
00:13:18,634 --> 00:13:19,545
Deal 'em, Joey.

215
00:13:19,794 --> 00:13:22,263
And a five and a ten, ten.

216
00:13:22,594 --> 00:13:23,505
Ace high.

217
00:13:23,994 --> 00:13:25,110
Why don't we double that.

218
00:13:25,194 --> 00:13:27,993
- Wow.
- You guys are bank robbers.

219
00:13:28,114 --> 00:13:29,673
Gotta know when to fold.

220
00:13:30,914 --> 00:13:33,509
My 700. Here's the river.

221
00:13:34,634 --> 00:13:37,354
Look at that!

222
00:13:37,434 --> 00:13:41,348
I'm gonna... just for the shit's sake,
I'm gonna bump it two.

223
00:13:41,434 --> 00:13:42,265
There's nine.

224
00:13:42,354 --> 00:13:43,947
- Burt, what are you? You all-in?
- I'm out.

225
00:13:44,234 --> 00:13:45,748
And I'm all-in.

226
00:13:45,834 --> 00:13:47,827
Oh man! What we gonna do?

227
00:13:47,915 --> 00:13:49,986
Okay, y'all. Read 'em and weep.

228
00:13:50,075 --> 00:13:52,635
- Full boat, aces up.
- Holy shit!

229
00:13:52,715 --> 00:13:53,944
We warned ya, Leo!

230
00:13:55,555 --> 00:13:57,433
- That's four tens.
- What?

231
00:13:58,235 --> 00:14:01,546
- Four tens.
- Damn, he beat Duke.

232
00:14:01,635 --> 00:14:02,955
I am deader than dead.

233
00:14:03,035 --> 00:14:04,355
I'm all cleaned out.

234
00:14:05,195 --> 00:14:06,072
Damn, I was lucky!

235
00:14:06,195 --> 00:14:08,835
Sometimes you step in horseshit
and you wind up smellin'...

236
00:14:08,915 --> 00:14:11,635
Excuse me, you know,
I think that one's mine.

237
00:14:12,475 --> 00:14:13,704
I didn't see that.

238
00:14:13,795 --> 00:14:16,469
What do you want? Why'd you come here?

239
00:14:16,675 --> 00:14:19,235
I came here to continue developing
my business empire

240
00:14:20,075 --> 00:14:21,907
while working on my shaky golf game.

241
00:14:22,475 --> 00:14:24,785
Oh, you... you play golf?

242
00:14:24,995 --> 00:14:27,988
Not well, but honestly and earnestly.

243
00:14:28,075 --> 00:14:30,635
Well, uh, perhaps
you will give me the chance

244
00:14:30,715 --> 00:14:32,627
to win back my money on the golf course.

245
00:14:32,715 --> 00:14:33,705
Perhaps I will.

246
00:14:34,915 --> 00:14:38,750
You know, a true gentleman
does not walk away a winner.

247
00:14:39,275 --> 00:14:41,745
A true gentleman keeps the game alive.

248
00:14:43,036 --> 00:14:46,393
Oh, my, my, my, my! Behold the evidence.

249
00:14:46,876 --> 00:14:48,754
Whatever can it mean?

250
00:14:48,836 --> 00:14:52,352
She's lookin' for deep comfort
and companionship and maybe a soulmate.

251
00:14:52,436 --> 00:14:53,426
Nuh-uh.

252
00:14:54,036 --> 00:14:55,470
She's not lookin' for soulmate.

253
00:14:55,556 --> 00:14:58,754
She's lookin' for a few precious hours
of intimate connections

254
00:14:58,876 --> 00:15:00,595
with no questions asked.

255
00:15:00,676 --> 00:15:03,032
Maybe I'll just go over there
and pick up the tab, huh?

256
00:15:03,116 --> 00:15:04,072
Can't compete with that.

257
00:15:07,196 --> 00:15:08,107
Shit!

258
00:15:09,156 --> 00:15:11,273
Well, could if I wanted to.

259
00:15:13,036 --> 00:15:13,992
Can I buy you another round?

260
00:15:14,076 --> 00:15:15,988
You can scram is what you can do.

261
00:15:21,516 --> 00:15:25,396
♪ The first noel ♪

262
00:15:25,476 --> 00:15:28,594
♪ The angel did say ♪

263
00:15:28,676 --> 00:15:35,470
♪ Was to certain poor shepherds ♪
♪ In fields as they lay ♪

264
00:15:35,997 --> 00:15:42,437
♪ In fields where they ♪
♪ Lay keeping their sheep ♪

265
00:15:42,917 --> 00:15:44,476
Season's greetin's, y'all.

266
00:15:44,717 --> 00:15:48,108
Good news to report.
Mike Shank from villa 68

267
00:15:48,197 --> 00:15:50,757
had a successful hip replacement surgery

268
00:15:50,837 --> 00:15:54,672
and should be back to the Villa Capri
in just a few days.

269
00:15:54,757 --> 00:15:55,793
What the...

270
00:15:57,077 --> 00:15:59,797
That's not my regular camel guy.
Where's my regular camel guy?

271
00:16:00,117 --> 00:16:01,551
Uh, he's uh, under the weather.

272
00:16:02,477 --> 00:16:05,868
Oh, uh, corporate is sending
a regional director down

273
00:16:05,957 --> 00:16:07,710
to do a year-end review in case it...

274
00:16:08,477 --> 00:16:09,308
slipped your mind.

275
00:16:09,397 --> 00:16:14,711
I will look down upon him
from a great height. Bring him on.

276
00:16:14,917 --> 00:16:16,510
Yeah. Bring him on.

277
00:16:18,117 --> 00:16:21,633
Ladies, have you seen the new guy?

278
00:16:22,277 --> 00:16:24,712
He's moving into villa 71.

279
00:16:24,837 --> 00:16:28,036
There's new food on the buffet.

280
00:16:28,118 --> 00:16:29,154
Yes.

281
00:16:29,238 --> 00:16:31,958
Oh, in the air, there's a feelin'
of Christmas.

282
00:16:32,038 --> 00:16:35,031
I'm Leo McKay,
and you young ladies might be...

283
00:16:38,598 --> 00:16:39,395
Look at that.

284
00:16:39,518 --> 00:16:43,432
I spent years juggling stories
to keep those women apart,

285
00:16:43,518 --> 00:16:46,158
and in 20 minutes,
he's got them lined up for a three-way.

286
00:16:46,238 --> 00:16:49,470
Well, uh, four-way if anybody's countin'.

287
00:16:49,558 --> 00:16:51,436
He's not showing me any respect.

288
00:16:51,518 --> 00:16:52,952
- No respect.
- No. Nothin'.

289
00:16:53,038 --> 00:16:55,872
But he's gonna find out this is my town.

290
00:16:56,398 --> 00:16:58,549
You're the Duke and this is your domain.
I told you.

291
00:16:58,838 --> 00:17:01,034
- Don't upset him, Larry!
- Duke don't like that.

292
00:17:07,278 --> 00:17:08,632
- Well, hello.
- Hello.

293
00:17:08,758 --> 00:17:11,478
I'm Roberta. We met earlier.

294
00:17:11,918 --> 00:17:13,830
You know, I neglected to mention

295
00:17:13,918 --> 00:17:18,151
that as president
of the Glad-Handers Welcome Wagon Club

296
00:17:18,238 --> 00:17:24,315
here at Villa Capri Resort Community,
I just wanted to say Merry Christmas.

297
00:17:26,079 --> 00:17:29,914
Oh! You know,
I could help you fix the place up.

298
00:17:29,999 --> 00:17:32,070
You know, a little Feng Shui.

299
00:17:32,999 --> 00:17:33,910
Oh!

300
00:17:36,039 --> 00:17:38,156
- I got skills.
- I'll bet you do.

301
00:17:38,239 --> 00:17:40,913
What you got back here? The dinin' room?

302
00:17:41,879 --> 00:17:44,189
The bedroom. Giddy-up!

303
00:17:51,199 --> 00:17:54,988
Hi. I'm Marguerite
with the Welcome Wagon Club.

304
00:17:55,079 --> 00:17:57,355
- Are you a Glad-Hander?
- How'd you know?

305
00:17:58,439 --> 00:18:02,513
As secretary-treasurer, I brought
a little somethin' to warm up your place.

306
00:18:02,599 --> 00:18:05,194
- A work of art.
- My sentiments exactly.

307
00:18:06,479 --> 00:18:08,675
- And thank you.
- For what?

308
00:18:08,759 --> 00:18:12,595
Did you just invite me in
for a little vino?

309
00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:16,270
Red? I love red.

310
00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:19,269
I love white. I love it all.

311
00:18:19,360 --> 00:18:23,070
Well, then how about a lovely Margaux
for a lovely Margot? Can I call you that?

312
00:18:23,160 --> 00:18:24,879
You can call me whatever you like.

313
00:18:25,440 --> 00:18:27,875
By the way, I am in villa 52.

314
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:30,475
And I'm in villa 36.
What you gonna call me?

315
00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:32,870
Oh my God! How did you get here before me?

316
00:18:32,960 --> 00:18:35,316
You know that the by-laws
of our club clearly state

317
00:18:35,400 --> 00:18:37,869
that the president
and not the secretary-treasurer

318
00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:39,519
should be the first Welcomer on the scene.

319
00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:41,393
Okay, well let's just call this
an unofficial visit.

320
00:18:41,480 --> 00:18:42,436
- Unofficial?
- Why don't we just have a taste

321
00:18:42,560 --> 00:18:43,710
of this delightful vintage?

322
00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:46,952
- Oh!
- Don we now our straight apparel.

323
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:48,394
- Oh, my God!
- And what office

324
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:51,234
of Glad-Handers Welcome Wagon Club
might you hold?

325
00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:53,359
Sergeant-at-arms.

326
00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:55,671
Flag flying stiff and ready, I bet.

327
00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:57,399
I think this party's just gettin' started.

328
00:18:57,480 --> 00:19:00,359
- Here, why don't I take you to dinner?
- All of us?

329
00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:04,831
Thank you.

330
00:19:04,921 --> 00:19:07,117
- Oh, boy.
- Oh, yes, sir.

331
00:19:07,961 --> 00:19:10,112
Look at him. Look at him.

332
00:19:12,161 --> 00:19:13,914
He's got all three of 'em?

333
00:19:15,641 --> 00:19:18,031
He's bangin' your entire harem, boss.

334
00:19:18,121 --> 00:19:21,193
Oh my God! Some big,
brass huevos he's got!

335
00:19:21,521 --> 00:19:22,796
Is he punkin' you, boss?

336
00:19:23,281 --> 00:19:25,318
He's playin' into my hand
is what he's doin'.

337
00:19:26,761 --> 00:19:28,798
He said his golf game is shaky,
am I right?

338
00:19:28,881 --> 00:19:30,281
- That's what he said.
- That's what he said.

339
00:19:30,401 --> 00:19:34,315
Well, gentlemen, who knows
this golf course better than me?

340
00:19:34,881 --> 00:19:38,397
- Old cowboy's in trouble now.
- Oh, I feel bad for Leo.

341
00:19:38,481 --> 00:19:40,359
We'll see.

342
00:19:47,881 --> 00:19:52,319
I hereby challenge you to 18 holes of golf
tomorrow morning at 9 a.m. sharp.

343
00:19:55,321 --> 00:19:56,550
Cowboy done stepped in it now.

344
00:20:03,402 --> 00:20:06,440
We hear that you consider
yourself a citizen of the world.

345
00:20:06,562 --> 00:20:09,157
Now exactly what does that mean to you?

346
00:20:09,242 --> 00:20:10,232
It means that I have traveled

347
00:20:10,322 --> 00:20:12,917
from the Cape of Good Hope
to the Black Sea,

348
00:20:13,002 --> 00:20:16,757
from Machu Picchu to Brunelleschi's Dome.

349
00:20:17,002 --> 00:20:20,200
I have been to the birthplace
of Mr. Shakespeare.

350
00:20:21,282 --> 00:20:24,320
And I have been to the gravesite
of Mr. Lombardi.

351
00:20:24,402 --> 00:20:25,438
Oh.

352
00:20:27,202 --> 00:20:32,038
I rose from the dusty fields
to the gilded halls of power,

353
00:20:32,122 --> 00:20:34,557
first in the military
and then in the business world,

354
00:20:34,642 --> 00:20:37,760
and yet, to this day, I retain my touch
to the common man!

355
00:20:38,442 --> 00:20:40,161
For that is who I am.

356
00:20:40,242 --> 00:20:43,679
Oh, Mr. McKay, you are indeed a poet.

357
00:20:43,762 --> 00:20:46,072
I'm not a poet but I have read
the great works.

358
00:20:46,922 --> 00:20:48,595
Would you favor us with a poem?

359
00:20:48,682 --> 00:20:49,911
Pretty please.

360
00:20:50,002 --> 00:20:52,996
Well, why not? Um, Baudelaire?

361
00:20:53,083 --> 00:20:54,358
More modernist, maybe?

362
00:20:54,443 --> 00:20:56,639
Yeats? Williams? Cummings?

363
00:20:56,723 --> 00:21:02,082
Or... or perhaps something a little more...
earthier with a...

364
00:21:02,403 --> 00:21:04,201
backdrop of Christmas.

365
00:21:04,283 --> 00:21:05,433
The last one.

366
00:21:05,843 --> 00:21:06,754
May I?

367
00:21:07,323 --> 00:21:08,234
Uh..

368
00:21:09,523 --> 00:21:11,958
"There are strange things done
in the midnight sun

369
00:21:12,043 --> 00:21:14,000
By the men who moil for gold;

370
00:21:14,603 --> 00:21:17,516
The Artic trails have their savage tales

371
00:21:17,603 --> 00:21:19,913
That will make your blood run cold;

372
00:21:20,003 --> 00:21:22,074
The Northern Lights
have seen queer sights,

373
00:21:22,163 --> 00:21:23,756
But the queerest they ever did see

374
00:21:23,843 --> 00:21:25,118
Was that night on the marge

375
00:21:25,203 --> 00:21:28,480
of Lake Lebarge I cremated Sam McGee."

376
00:21:29,003 --> 00:21:31,677
- Romeo! Romeo!
- "Now Sam McGee was from Tennessee..."

377
00:21:32,283 --> 00:21:34,161
Oh, Romeo! I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

378
00:21:34,243 --> 00:21:35,723
I'm sorry, he broke away.

379
00:21:36,003 --> 00:21:38,643
He's a sweetheart
but I can never shut him up.

380
00:21:38,723 --> 00:21:41,682
Sit. Be a good dog.

381
00:21:42,403 --> 00:21:44,043
Sit down.

382
00:21:47,684 --> 00:21:48,595
How'd you do that?

383
00:21:48,964 --> 00:21:50,114
I like dogs.

384
00:21:50,204 --> 00:21:51,354
Oh! Yeah?

385
00:21:52,804 --> 00:21:55,194
- I'm Leo McKay.
- Oh, Suzie Quince.

386
00:21:55,284 --> 00:21:56,923
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

387
00:21:57,484 --> 00:22:00,204
I'm so sorry to interrupt
whatever it is you're doing.

388
00:22:00,284 --> 00:22:01,434
That's quite all right.

389
00:22:02,924 --> 00:22:04,324
Okay. Well, carry on.

390
00:22:08,004 --> 00:22:11,281
"On Christmas Day we were mushing
our way along the Dawson trail.

391
00:22:11,644 --> 00:22:13,954
Talk of your cold!
Through the parkas fold.

392
00:22:14,044 --> 00:22:15,080
It stabbed like a...

393
00:22:17,804 --> 00:22:20,922
it stabbed like a driven nail."

394
00:22:32,324 --> 00:22:33,644
Sr. Jiménez!

395
00:22:33,724 --> 00:22:36,115
Miguel Jiménez! That's it.

396
00:22:36,605 --> 00:22:37,561
Here he comes.

397
00:22:37,645 --> 00:22:39,762
That's it. Loosen up, Dukie.

398
00:22:39,885 --> 00:22:41,035
You got 'em now.

399
00:22:44,085 --> 00:22:45,963
Good morning! I accept your challenge.

400
00:22:46,325 --> 00:22:47,759
Well, I'm loose as a goose.

401
00:22:48,085 --> 00:22:52,045
Mark Twain said that golf
is a good walk spoiled, but I say...

402
00:22:53,205 --> 00:22:54,605
It's a good walk enhanced.

403
00:22:54,685 --> 00:22:56,677
Except that neither one of us
is walking, huh?

404
00:22:56,765 --> 00:22:59,724
Details, details, details.

405
00:22:59,805 --> 00:23:00,761
I am a big picture man.

406
00:23:03,125 --> 00:23:05,082
Uh, boss, we got a problem.

407
00:23:05,165 --> 00:23:07,043
- What?
- This guy can flat-out play!

408
00:23:07,125 --> 00:23:08,718
He said his game was shaky.

409
00:23:09,125 --> 00:23:11,242
His shaky is better than your shaky.

410
00:23:11,325 --> 00:23:12,645
- Wait...
- Boss.

411
00:23:12,885 --> 00:23:14,319
We watched him warm up this morning.

412
00:23:14,405 --> 00:23:17,079
This guy can flat out hit. I ain't lyin'.

413
00:23:17,405 --> 00:23:18,475
I got a short game.

414
00:23:18,565 --> 00:23:21,319
He's got a short game, too,
and a long game.

415
00:23:21,405 --> 00:23:22,441
I assume I have the honors.

416
00:23:22,525 --> 00:23:23,402
Uh, yes, you do.

417
00:23:23,485 --> 00:23:26,717
Um, just a word of caution.
Out of bounds is to your right.

418
00:23:26,805 --> 00:23:28,398
That's the way I like it.

419
00:23:28,485 --> 00:23:29,556
It's to the left.

420
00:23:41,126 --> 00:23:42,845
Oh shit! The guy can hit the ball.

421
00:23:43,646 --> 00:23:45,922
Is that a legal club?
I don't think that's a legal club.

422
00:23:46,006 --> 00:23:47,645
My side bet with you is off.

423
00:23:47,726 --> 00:23:49,285
We might as well get some new girlfriends.

424
00:23:49,366 --> 00:23:51,801
Thanks for the confidence, fellas.
Gee whiz!

425
00:23:51,886 --> 00:23:54,481
Well, you're a thinking man.
It's a thinking man's game.

426
00:23:54,566 --> 00:23:56,558
I think I'm gonna
hit a three wood out here.

427
00:23:56,646 --> 00:23:57,682
Three wood. Good idea.

428
00:23:57,766 --> 00:23:58,882
- Are you sure?
- Yeah that'll be good.

429
00:23:59,006 --> 00:24:01,362
Yeah, okay.

430
00:24:02,246 --> 00:24:03,157
Let it fly.

431
00:24:03,846 --> 00:24:05,041
Oh shit!

432
00:24:06,886 --> 00:24:08,161
It's a damn cobra!

433
00:24:08,246 --> 00:24:10,886
- Gun! Gun!
- I... I... I got it! I got it!

434
00:24:11,726 --> 00:24:13,638
- Damn!
- I got it! I got it!

435
00:24:13,726 --> 00:24:14,637
You see that?

436
00:24:19,606 --> 00:24:21,518
Oh, my God. Oh, my God!

437
00:24:22,207 --> 00:24:24,085
Okay, die, viper!

438
00:24:26,047 --> 00:24:27,925
- You got him surrounded.
- Still movin'!

439
00:24:29,607 --> 00:24:31,087
Don't hurt yourself with that thing.

440
00:24:33,167 --> 00:24:34,726
Somebody bring a beer cooler, please.

441
00:24:39,727 --> 00:24:41,639
Somebody put a cap on...
put a top on the bucket.

442
00:24:43,647 --> 00:24:45,479
I never had you figured
for a man packin' iron

443
00:24:45,567 --> 00:24:46,842
even if it is a peashooter.

444
00:24:47,367 --> 00:24:49,643
You never know
who's lurkin' around.

445
00:24:50,127 --> 00:24:53,199
Take him to the Serpentarium in 29 Palms.

446
00:24:53,287 --> 00:24:55,961
Look out! Look out!

447
00:24:56,047 --> 00:24:58,357
Sit... sit on that thing.
Sit on it, you're the biggest.

448
00:24:58,447 --> 00:24:59,358
Come on.

449
00:25:03,407 --> 00:25:05,239
Oh! Goddamn!

450
00:25:05,367 --> 00:25:07,438
Wait! Wait!

451
00:25:10,807 --> 00:25:13,367
- You're good. Sit on it now. Sit down.
- Sit down.

452
00:25:13,447 --> 00:25:14,278
Oh, we're good.

453
00:25:14,367 --> 00:25:15,199
I almost got bit.

454
00:25:15,288 --> 00:25:16,688
I'm not going anywhere near that golf bag.

455
00:25:16,768 --> 00:25:17,918
You bailin' out of our game?

456
00:25:18,048 --> 00:25:21,439
I have trouble swingin' a golf club
with a rattlesnake wrapped around it, Leo.

457
00:25:21,528 --> 00:25:26,523
- You're afraid to play me.
- I'm not afraid of anything or anyone.

458
00:25:30,008 --> 00:25:30,919
Coward.

459
00:25:32,048 --> 00:25:33,118
Doin' a good job, Burt.

460
00:25:33,208 --> 00:25:36,884
- Come on, I need a drink.
- I think it's happy hour.

461
00:25:37,168 --> 00:25:41,287
- ...sit on that thing...
Leo, hell am I supposed to do now?

462
00:25:41,728 --> 00:25:43,287
Hell, I don't know. Not my problem.

463
00:25:44,848 --> 00:25:45,759
Sit on it!

464
00:25:47,048 --> 00:25:50,280
When a man lets another man
take care of his golf bag, Jimmy,

465
00:25:50,368 --> 00:25:52,007
he has certain expectations.

466
00:25:52,088 --> 00:25:56,048
You think a snake zipped himself
into a pocket in my bag?

467
00:25:56,168 --> 00:25:58,478
Snakes don't have opposable thumbs.

468
00:25:59,488 --> 00:26:00,842
This was not an accident.

469
00:26:03,048 --> 00:26:03,959
Shit!

470
00:26:06,408 --> 00:26:07,445
What took you so long?

471
00:26:08,129 --> 00:26:09,040
Oh, thank you.

472
00:26:10,969 --> 00:26:12,528
I see I'm gonna have
to teach you a lesson.

473
00:26:12,609 --> 00:26:14,487
I would love to have another poker lesson

474
00:26:14,569 --> 00:26:16,686
unless you find it easier
just to write me a check.

475
00:26:17,249 --> 00:26:19,480
Tell me somethin',
did you move to Villa Capri

476
00:26:19,609 --> 00:26:20,725
just to piss me off?

477
00:26:20,809 --> 00:26:22,641
No, that was just a happy by-product.

478
00:26:22,729 --> 00:26:24,846
But this anger is doin' you a lot of good.

479
00:26:24,929 --> 00:26:26,648
It gets the blood circulating
throughout your entire body

480
00:26:26,729 --> 00:26:27,924
instead of down there in your little ol'...

481
00:26:28,009 --> 00:26:30,205
You're lucky I have a commitment
of a higher calling at home.

482
00:26:31,369 --> 00:26:34,646
You and I... just gettin' started.

483
00:26:36,929 --> 00:26:37,885
I can hardly wait.

484
00:26:39,329 --> 00:26:40,240
Nice fella.

485
00:26:49,609 --> 00:26:50,520
Tell me he's dead.

486
00:26:53,409 --> 00:26:54,638
I... I... I know!

487
00:26:54,769 --> 00:26:56,681
I told you to make it look
like an accident,

488
00:26:56,769 --> 00:26:58,920
but a snake in his golf bag?

489
00:26:59,929 --> 00:27:00,841
Sweetie,

490
00:27:02,170 --> 00:27:03,889
murder him the old-fashioned way.

491
00:27:07,210 --> 00:27:08,530
Attention, residents:

492
00:27:08,610 --> 00:27:12,047
The annual tree lighting
is about to begin in the banquet hall.

493
00:27:12,410 --> 00:27:15,721
Come enjoy the holiday season,
sip some eggnog,

494
00:27:15,810 --> 00:27:18,803
and see everyone's favorite Santa Claus.

495
00:27:21,970 --> 00:27:24,485
♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪

496
00:27:24,730 --> 00:27:28,770
♪ 'Tis the season ♪
♪ To be jolly fa-la-la... ♪

497
00:27:31,610 --> 00:27:33,249
Hey, uh, whoa, whoa!

498
00:27:33,490 --> 00:27:35,482
Santa, what the hell
do you think you're doin'?

499
00:27:35,570 --> 00:27:37,289
- This is my job.
- Oh, no, no, no. It's not.

500
00:27:37,370 --> 00:27:39,487
I was hired by the corporation
that owns Villa Capri

501
00:27:39,570 --> 00:27:42,244
and 26 other luxury villages
in California.

502
00:27:42,610 --> 00:27:45,409
My party rental company will supply
Santas, Easter Bunnies,

503
00:27:45,530 --> 00:27:48,648
fife and drum trios for the Fourth,
and all holidays through the year.

504
00:27:48,970 --> 00:27:49,926
I just signed the contract.

505
00:27:50,010 --> 00:27:51,046
Well, ho, ho, ho.

506
00:27:51,290 --> 00:27:52,883
You're tellin' me
you're a corporate Santa?

507
00:27:52,970 --> 00:27:55,406
- It's a gig.
- It's a sacred trust!

508
00:27:55,491 --> 00:27:57,801
Sacred trust to you.
20 bucks an hour to me.

509
00:27:58,611 --> 00:28:00,887
♪ Deck the halls with boughs of holly ♪

510
00:28:00,971 --> 00:28:02,041
♪ Fa-la-la-la-la... ♪

511
00:28:02,171 --> 00:28:03,207
It's a disgrace.

512
00:28:03,771 --> 00:28:05,364
♪ 'Tis the season to be jolly ♪

513
00:28:05,451 --> 00:28:07,602
Hello, Palms Springs!
Thank you all for comin' out.

514
00:28:07,691 --> 00:28:09,045
Duke's not gonna like this.

515
00:28:09,451 --> 00:28:11,886
- Who is this guy?
- Here comes the freight train.

516
00:28:13,251 --> 00:28:14,924
I got your ho-ho right here.

517
00:28:16,811 --> 00:28:17,767
Yes!

518
00:28:18,891 --> 00:28:22,248
That ain't the real Santa.
I'm the real Santa.

519
00:28:22,691 --> 00:28:24,762
This guy's a fraud, a phony.

520
00:28:24,851 --> 00:28:27,161
He's a sleazy, corporate heathen!

521
00:28:34,691 --> 00:28:35,727
Go, Black Santa!

522
00:28:41,371 --> 00:28:44,284
There ya go! Back to the North Pole!

523
00:28:52,172 --> 00:28:53,162
What got into you?

524
00:28:53,972 --> 00:28:55,611
I don't like people
fucking with Santa Claus.

525
00:29:00,532 --> 00:29:01,443
Arturo.

526
00:29:03,052 --> 00:29:03,963
Here you are, gentlemen.

527
00:29:04,052 --> 00:29:07,682
You, my friend, are a gentleman
and a scholar,

528
00:29:08,532 --> 00:29:10,842
and you are indeed here on business.

529
00:29:12,052 --> 00:29:12,963
Whatever that is.

530
00:29:13,052 --> 00:29:14,566
My business is my business,

531
00:29:14,652 --> 00:29:17,406
but your business seems to be
sitting in a catbird seat

532
00:29:17,772 --> 00:29:20,162
of one-night stands
and Thursday night specials

533
00:29:20,292 --> 00:29:21,612
and Tuesday nooners.

534
00:29:22,852 --> 00:29:25,651
Which holds
no special satisfaction for me.

535
00:29:25,932 --> 00:29:28,288
What? No Tuesday nooners?

536
00:29:28,372 --> 00:29:30,841
I'm not interested in your girlfriends.

537
00:29:31,212 --> 00:29:36,890
But I could endure
the courtship of a soulmate.

538
00:29:41,173 --> 00:29:42,209
Appreciate it, thank you.

539
00:29:42,573 --> 00:29:44,087
Good. Good boy.

540
00:29:44,413 --> 00:29:47,884
In fact, the perfect soulmate for me
might very well be Miss Suzie Quince

541
00:29:48,333 --> 00:29:49,369
sitting right there.

542
00:29:50,133 --> 00:29:51,249
You... you know her name?

543
00:29:51,333 --> 00:29:52,289
I move like the wind.

544
00:29:52,373 --> 00:29:54,490
- You mean you met her already?
- At a taco truck.

545
00:29:54,573 --> 00:29:55,689
You liar.

546
00:29:55,773 --> 00:29:57,446
Her dog's name is Romeo.

547
00:29:59,013 --> 00:29:59,924
Romeo?

548
00:30:02,453 --> 00:30:06,288
Well, I think Romeo is precisely
what she's looking for tonight.

549
00:30:06,373 --> 00:30:08,888
Santa from the southern hemisphere.

550
00:30:10,333 --> 00:30:14,043
If she falls for a drunk Santa Claus,
I've badly misjudged her character.

551
00:30:15,613 --> 00:30:16,569
Watch this.

552
00:30:18,333 --> 00:30:19,528
And I'm not drunk.

553
00:30:24,733 --> 00:30:25,610
Hi.

554
00:30:26,853 --> 00:30:27,764
Hi.

555
00:30:28,413 --> 00:30:32,169
My name is St. Nicholas.
You can call me Nick.

556
00:30:32,894 --> 00:30:33,805
Susan.

557
00:30:34,814 --> 00:30:38,808
I was just... I was just doing
some Christmas tree lighting and stuff

558
00:30:38,894 --> 00:30:40,965
with some people who needed some joy.

559
00:30:41,534 --> 00:30:44,129
Well, I guess a half-wit Santa
who does kind deeds

560
00:30:44,254 --> 00:30:45,768
for lonely people can't do much harm.

561
00:30:46,174 --> 00:30:47,927
Then I'll take that
as an invitation.

562
00:30:49,934 --> 00:30:52,324
Here we are. Christmas season.

563
00:30:53,414 --> 00:30:54,370
Nobody's home.

564
00:30:55,134 --> 00:30:57,171
Family long gone. Kids far away.

565
00:30:57,574 --> 00:31:00,612
Is there a husband lurking around?

566
00:31:01,214 --> 00:31:02,534
- Hm?
- No.

567
00:31:03,774 --> 00:31:05,652
- First one flew the coop.
- Ah!

568
00:31:05,934 --> 00:31:07,493
Got married again and I flew the coop.

569
00:31:08,134 --> 00:31:09,454
Lots of coops.

570
00:31:10,014 --> 00:31:12,051
- So, you'll never try it again?
- Mm-mm.

571
00:31:13,294 --> 00:31:15,286
I decided my final marriage
would be to my job.

572
00:31:16,534 --> 00:31:17,650
That's kind of sad.

573
00:31:18,094 --> 00:31:20,245
It's focused. It's not sad.

574
00:31:22,934 --> 00:31:24,733
You look... sad.

575
00:31:27,215 --> 00:31:29,446
Well, I've been sent here on business

576
00:31:29,535 --> 00:31:31,254
to fire someone before the year is out

577
00:31:31,855 --> 00:31:33,608
during the Christmas season, so...

578
00:31:34,575 --> 00:31:38,615
Well, if a guy is not up to the task,
the quicker you do it, the better, right?

579
00:31:38,695 --> 00:31:40,652
Mm... Yeah.

580
00:31:40,735 --> 00:31:42,294
Season's greetings. Clean out your desk.

581
00:31:43,375 --> 00:31:44,411
That's not so easy.

582
00:31:46,895 --> 00:31:48,454
But at least the music cheers me up.

583
00:31:48,735 --> 00:31:52,206
I love Johnny Mathis.
I have all 42 of his albums.

584
00:31:52,295 --> 00:31:53,809
- Really?
- All 42.

585
00:31:54,575 --> 00:31:56,009
Johnny is a good friend of mine.

586
00:31:56,335 --> 00:31:58,213
- Come on!
- No, really.

587
00:31:58,295 --> 00:31:59,615
You know Johnny Mathis?

588
00:32:00,135 --> 00:32:01,251
We're practically brothers.

589
00:32:01,695 --> 00:32:07,054
You know, your hair shines like the shun.

590
00:32:07,335 --> 00:32:08,246
The "shun"?

591
00:32:08,415 --> 00:32:11,089
You know, big-ass ball
that rises in the East,

592
00:32:11,735 --> 00:32:15,092
- sets in the San Bernardino mountains.
- Oh, yeah. Okay.

593
00:32:15,175 --> 00:32:16,325
- You know something?
- Huh?

594
00:32:16,415 --> 00:32:17,691
- Santa Claus...
- Hey.

595
00:32:18,376 --> 00:32:20,129
I think we need to go. Let this young lady

596
00:32:20,216 --> 00:32:21,570
- have some time to herself.
- Thank you.

597
00:32:21,656 --> 00:32:22,692
This is Leo.

598
00:32:23,176 --> 00:32:25,168
- Leo is my buddy.
- Hello, Leo.

599
00:32:25,256 --> 00:32:26,610
Gentleman and a scholar.

600
00:32:26,696 --> 00:32:28,176
I gotta get you outta here, man.
You're drunk.

601
00:32:28,496 --> 00:32:30,374
- I'm not drunk, Leo.
- I know.

602
00:32:30,456 --> 00:32:31,572
- Just overserved.
- Come on.

603
00:32:31,696 --> 00:32:33,653
- Okay, come on.
- I'll see you later.

604
00:32:34,016 --> 00:32:35,848
I appreciate the intervention,
thank you.

605
00:32:39,416 --> 00:32:40,736
Yeah, good boy.

606
00:32:44,296 --> 00:32:49,974
You know, I ever tell you
what a gentleman and a scholar you are?

607
00:32:50,056 --> 00:32:51,570
Yeah, you did. You did.

608
00:32:51,656 --> 00:32:53,215
Get your ass in the truck.

609
00:32:53,296 --> 00:32:54,855
Watch my knees.

610
00:32:55,176 --> 00:32:56,690
They're old knees.

611
00:32:57,056 --> 00:32:58,285
Thank you, partner.

612
00:33:01,576 --> 00:33:02,726
Thank you.

613
00:33:03,896 --> 00:33:05,012
My friend.

614
00:33:12,617 --> 00:33:16,770
Leo... You are a very mysterious man.

615
00:33:16,857 --> 00:33:18,576
I just play my cards close, that's all.

616
00:33:18,937 --> 00:33:23,090
No, I mean...
I mean, I mean you're easy to talk to.

617
00:33:23,857 --> 00:33:24,768
Hm?

618
00:33:25,497 --> 00:33:30,526
And I got a big secret. Ginormous secret.

619
00:33:31,137 --> 00:33:33,174
- You wanna hear it?
- No, not really, no.

620
00:33:33,257 --> 00:33:34,611
Seriously, Leo.

621
00:33:35,137 --> 00:33:36,776
- Seriously?
- Yeah.

622
00:33:37,337 --> 00:33:38,487
You're not a serious man.

623
00:33:38,577 --> 00:33:40,057
A serious man would
not have behaved himself

624
00:33:40,137 --> 00:33:42,015
in front of Miss Suzie Quince
the way you did.

625
00:33:42,417 --> 00:33:43,328
What?

626
00:33:43,617 --> 00:33:49,853
You're just jealous
because she was so receptive. You...

627
00:33:50,217 --> 00:33:52,174
You are not as charming
as you think you are.

628
00:33:53,097 --> 00:33:54,008
Hey...

629
00:33:54,657 --> 00:33:56,535
agree to disagree, babe.

630
00:34:01,137 --> 00:34:03,369
- I need a cup of coffee.
- You need a new liver.

631
00:34:03,498 --> 00:34:06,218
You should have seen
what she was doin' with her eyes.

632
00:34:06,298 --> 00:34:08,210
I did. She was looking for an exit.

633
00:34:08,938 --> 00:34:12,295
♪ Silent night ♪

634
00:34:12,738 --> 00:34:15,776
♪ Holy night ♪

635
00:34:16,458 --> 00:34:19,849
♪ All is calm ♪

636
00:34:20,338 --> 00:34:23,331
♪ All is bright ♪

637
00:34:23,738 --> 00:34:26,458
♪ 'Round yon virgin... ♪

638
00:34:26,898 --> 00:34:29,493
Duke, you still rule
this one side of town.

639
00:34:29,578 --> 00:34:31,297
- Yeah.
- Kick corporate's ass.

640
00:34:31,778 --> 00:34:35,408
Leo's, uh, a pretty good guy.

641
00:34:35,498 --> 00:34:36,454
To the status quo.

642
00:34:36,538 --> 00:34:38,894
The way we've always done things.

643
00:34:38,978 --> 00:34:40,128
- Status quo.
- Duke.

644
00:34:40,218 --> 00:34:41,368
- What?
- Boss is here.

645
00:34:41,778 --> 00:34:43,292
The hell are you talkin' about?
I'm the boss.

646
00:34:43,378 --> 00:34:45,654
I mean, the regional director.

647
00:34:45,738 --> 00:34:48,572
Oh, yeah. Send his sorry-ass in.

648
00:34:56,859 --> 00:34:58,054
Hello,

649
00:34:58,179 --> 00:35:00,296
I'm Suzie Quince, regional director.

650
00:35:02,419 --> 00:35:05,730
I... thought...
I thought you said you were...

651
00:35:06,579 --> 00:35:11,017
sent down here to evaluate
somebody's job performance,

652
00:35:11,099 --> 00:35:14,729
maybe fire them before the year was out?

653
00:35:15,179 --> 00:35:17,136
When you're not Santa Claus,
are you Duke Diver?

654
00:35:17,819 --> 00:35:20,414
- Probably.
- Well, when a man's not up to the task,

655
00:35:20,739 --> 00:35:22,458
it's best to get it over with quick.

656
00:35:24,939 --> 00:35:27,659
Guys, guys, why don't you go out
and practice

657
00:35:27,739 --> 00:35:30,095
your shuffleboard stroke or something?

658
00:35:36,419 --> 00:35:38,376
There are many, many irregularities.

659
00:35:38,459 --> 00:35:41,372
You're damn right,
and I got one I wanna report right now.

660
00:35:41,459 --> 00:35:42,290
Please do.

661
00:35:42,379 --> 00:35:47,534
They sent us a very, very bad Santa Claus.
I wanna know who hired him.

662
00:35:47,619 --> 00:35:48,530
I did.

663
00:35:49,220 --> 00:35:50,051
I made a deal

664
00:35:50,140 --> 00:35:52,860
with a national party rental firm
to service all our outlets.

665
00:35:53,700 --> 00:35:55,419
- Our outlets?
- Yes.

666
00:35:56,220 --> 00:35:57,449
Lady, this is our home.

667
00:35:58,180 --> 00:36:00,376
We have a way of doing things
here... that work.

668
00:36:00,460 --> 00:36:02,258
This isn't your company, Mr. Diver.

669
00:36:02,340 --> 00:36:04,980
- Protocols are not being followed.
- Protocols?

670
00:36:05,580 --> 00:36:06,775
Everybody's happy here.

671
00:36:06,860 --> 00:36:10,058
Aren't you happy?
And happiness is not a condition, lady.

672
00:36:10,540 --> 00:36:12,497
- It's a choice.
- No! Okay. Well, you know what?

673
00:36:12,580 --> 00:36:14,811
I don't need your pop psychology,
Dr. Phil.

674
00:36:14,900 --> 00:36:17,176
And don't knock Dr. Phil.
He's a personal friend of mine.

675
00:36:17,540 --> 00:36:20,578
Oh, Johnny Mathis and Dr. Phil.

676
00:36:22,780 --> 00:36:24,373
You're an unhappy woman.

677
00:36:25,140 --> 00:36:26,699
And you're wrong about me.

678
00:36:26,780 --> 00:36:28,897
Well, happiness can be found
in a lot of places

679
00:36:29,020 --> 00:36:31,580
including a fine bar late at night.

680
00:36:32,020 --> 00:36:32,931
Alone?

681
00:36:33,660 --> 00:36:34,889
- Jimmy?
- Hm?

682
00:36:35,860 --> 00:36:39,774
Have the bookkeeper gather
all records, receipts, contracts,

683
00:36:39,860 --> 00:36:41,659
and have them on my desk in the morning

684
00:36:41,901 --> 00:36:46,054
along with every piece of paper
that Duke Diver ever signed.

685
00:36:46,541 --> 00:36:49,295
Uh, you want every single one?

686
00:36:49,381 --> 00:36:51,213
Every single one.

687
00:36:52,421 --> 00:36:54,014
I suppose you want a tour.

688
00:36:54,101 --> 00:36:55,660
Of the entire operation.

689
00:36:56,741 --> 00:36:57,652
Romeo.

690
00:36:58,701 --> 00:37:01,011
Oh shit!

691
00:37:06,501 --> 00:37:07,935
I think you're going to be
very impressed

692
00:37:08,061 --> 00:37:09,415
with what we have going on here.

693
00:37:12,621 --> 00:37:14,260
Oh, tango.

694
00:37:14,741 --> 00:37:15,572
Duke's idea.

695
00:37:17,421 --> 00:37:19,458
Oh, tai chi.

696
00:37:19,541 --> 00:37:21,021
Also Duke's idea.

697
00:37:23,261 --> 00:37:26,459
Now, I think you're going to be
especially impressed with this.

698
00:37:26,581 --> 00:37:28,971
- This is very important...
- This is our regular Thursday class.

699
00:37:29,061 --> 00:37:31,212
Real sex, loving sex,

700
00:37:31,301 --> 00:37:34,693
affectionate, tender, nasty, dirty sex

701
00:37:34,782 --> 00:37:37,980
still must be part of your daily
existence.

702
00:37:38,062 --> 00:37:40,782
The older we get, the better it gets.

703
00:37:43,462 --> 00:37:44,373
Duke's idea.

704
00:37:44,742 --> 00:37:45,812
Catching on.

705
00:37:45,902 --> 00:37:48,622
In defense of Mr. Diver,
this place is always packed.

706
00:37:48,702 --> 00:37:51,262
Last week we had this expert on group sex,
and he said that the...

707
00:37:51,342 --> 00:37:54,460
Oh... there's experts on that?

708
00:37:55,902 --> 00:37:56,779
Yes.

709
00:37:57,622 --> 00:37:59,056
And he was very,

710
00:38:00,182 --> 00:38:01,298
very good.

711
00:38:03,022 --> 00:38:03,933
Okay.

712
00:38:04,262 --> 00:38:06,333
I know that you feel
like you might have seen enough, but

713
00:38:06,662 --> 00:38:08,779
I promise you this place
is absolutely wonderful.

714
00:38:08,862 --> 00:38:10,455
The rocks. You can see
the rock formations.

715
00:38:10,582 --> 00:38:12,062
I don't know if you've studied geology,

716
00:38:12,142 --> 00:38:15,340
but I just, I really hope you can
come to love it here the way we all do.

717
00:38:16,462 --> 00:38:18,135
I mean, Duke is doing a great job.

718
00:38:18,222 --> 00:38:19,338
If you could just...

719
00:38:20,942 --> 00:38:22,501
It really is beautiful out here.

720
00:38:24,262 --> 00:38:25,173
Leo.

721
00:38:27,182 --> 00:38:29,618
Oh shit! Oh, this is bad.

722
00:38:29,703 --> 00:38:31,137
This is gonna be bad!

723
00:38:32,183 --> 00:38:33,537
There was some blue in there.

724
00:38:37,423 --> 00:38:38,379
That's stunning.

725
00:38:38,663 --> 00:38:39,574
Yes, you are.

726
00:38:42,663 --> 00:38:46,703
So, uh, you rescue damsels in distress,
you're a poet, and you paint.

727
00:38:46,783 --> 00:38:48,502
I'm exploring my feminine side.

728
00:38:50,903 --> 00:38:54,613
So, uh, are you friends with Duke Diver?
Seems like an odd combination.

729
00:38:54,703 --> 00:38:55,932
Friend is a very strong word.

730
00:38:58,463 --> 00:38:59,260
It's primal.

731
00:38:59,383 --> 00:39:00,863
Yeah. It is.

732
00:39:01,703 --> 00:39:04,138
Son of a bitch, what is he up to?

733
00:39:10,463 --> 00:39:12,853
I thought you said
you had to uncover enough irregularities

734
00:39:12,943 --> 00:39:14,218
so you could fire me.

735
00:39:14,983 --> 00:39:16,463
Well, I'm still reviewing the books.

736
00:39:16,543 --> 00:39:18,023
Your friend's a painter.

737
00:39:18,103 --> 00:39:18,934
Who knew?

738
00:39:19,023 --> 00:39:20,504
It's the San Jacinto mountains.

739
00:39:20,584 --> 00:39:22,735
- It's the what?
- It's the San Jacinto mountains.

740
00:39:24,144 --> 00:39:26,056
If this is the San Jacinto mountains,

741
00:39:26,384 --> 00:39:27,864
Bob Hope's house is right here.

742
00:39:27,944 --> 00:39:29,663
I'm not puttin'
Bob Hope's house in my picture.

743
00:39:29,744 --> 00:39:31,417
Thought it would make it better,
if you'd ask me.

744
00:39:31,504 --> 00:39:33,735
No. Do you see the influence of Cézanne...

745
00:39:33,824 --> 00:39:36,180
...I owe everything to Cézanne.

746
00:39:36,264 --> 00:39:39,780
Oh, I see a little more expressionism
than impressionism.

747
00:39:40,104 --> 00:39:42,494
A little bit more Kirchner than Cézanne.

748
00:39:42,584 --> 00:39:46,897
Maybe just a tiny touch
of Friedensreich Hundertwasser.

749
00:39:46,984 --> 00:39:48,703
I remind you of Friedrich Hundertwasser?

750
00:39:49,424 --> 00:39:51,620
Hm. I may have to reassess my own work.

751
00:39:51,704 --> 00:39:53,900
This is shit!

752
00:39:55,024 --> 00:39:58,017
Romeo? Romeo!

753
00:39:58,104 --> 00:40:00,016
Oh, no, no!

754
00:40:02,144 --> 00:40:03,055
Oh, God!

755
00:40:09,184 --> 00:40:10,140
Romeo!

756
00:40:11,104 --> 00:40:12,060
Thank you.

757
00:40:13,185 --> 00:40:16,781
Oh, Leo, thank you.

758
00:40:16,865 --> 00:40:19,016
Oh, Romeo. Thank you so much.

759
00:40:19,105 --> 00:40:21,017
Hop in the truck
and I will take you to the vet.

760
00:40:21,105 --> 00:40:22,016
Oh, Leo!

761
00:40:22,865 --> 00:40:23,935
Mr. Hero.

762
00:40:34,305 --> 00:40:36,695
There. Bob Hope's house.

763
00:40:37,945 --> 00:40:40,460
Looks better. It's not that damn hard.

764
00:40:40,985 --> 00:40:44,615
I have sad news
to report to the Villa Capri family today.

765
00:40:45,105 --> 00:40:49,099
Mike Shank in villa 68
had a massive coronary

766
00:40:49,185 --> 00:40:51,745
late last night while I was visiting.

767
00:40:52,705 --> 00:40:54,901
My presence was a total coincidence.

768
00:40:55,105 --> 00:40:57,859
Great, fellas. This is great.
This is your finest work.

769
00:40:58,225 --> 00:40:59,295
Hey, where you been, boss?

770
00:40:59,385 --> 00:41:02,742
Miss Quince.
She wants my neck and Leo's bed.

771
00:41:03,585 --> 00:41:04,701
Well, what you gonna do?

772
00:41:04,785 --> 00:41:05,696
This is war!

773
00:41:06,626 --> 00:41:10,415
Everything I've worked for at Villa Capri,
everything I've built is at stake.

774
00:41:10,786 --> 00:41:12,425
And if the corporation takes over,

775
00:41:12,506 --> 00:41:14,941
our very way of life disappears,
gentlemen.

776
00:41:15,266 --> 00:41:16,825
Miss Quince is evil.

777
00:41:17,186 --> 00:41:20,179
- She is evil, but she's hot.
- What you gonna do, boss?

778
00:41:21,186 --> 00:41:25,021
I'm gonna use my legendary charm,
if I may be so humble...

779
00:41:25,506 --> 00:41:27,225
- Mm-hm.
- And seduce her.

780
00:41:28,146 --> 00:41:30,138
Give her a bit of the old je ne sais quoi.

781
00:41:30,226 --> 00:41:31,421
That's Spanish, right?

782
00:41:32,026 --> 00:41:34,939
I'm gonna take the corporate starch
outta that woman's knickers.

783
00:41:35,026 --> 00:41:36,016
She deserves it.

784
00:41:36,106 --> 00:41:38,826
And if there's anybody can do it,
it's you, Duke.

785
00:41:38,906 --> 00:41:41,580
But first, Leo McKay.

786
00:41:41,666 --> 00:41:42,577
Mm-hm.

787
00:41:43,066 --> 00:41:44,056
I gotta take him down.

788
00:41:44,146 --> 00:41:45,500
- Oh!
- Take him down?

789
00:42:04,667 --> 00:42:06,420
Tie his hind legs together
with a pickin' string

790
00:42:06,507 --> 00:42:08,738
so he doesn't scratch those stitches out.

791
00:42:09,187 --> 00:42:12,897
- Uh, pickin' string?
- Yarn. It's soft, a knitting yarn.

792
00:42:12,987 --> 00:42:16,537
Oh, well, thanks. Thank you so much.
I really appreciate it.

793
00:42:16,667 --> 00:42:19,057
I have to get back
and do the company survey.

794
00:42:19,147 --> 00:42:21,946
You take your work seriously
and I respect that.

795
00:42:23,027 --> 00:42:25,622
Yeah. Thank you again. I so appreciate it.

796
00:42:25,707 --> 00:42:26,618
Yes, ma'am.

797
00:42:38,827 --> 00:42:39,738
Now what?

798
00:42:40,507 --> 00:42:41,577
Renaissance Man.

799
00:42:45,347 --> 00:42:46,258
What else do you do?

800
00:42:47,027 --> 00:42:48,859
I'm on a journey of self-discovery
and exploration...

801
00:42:48,947 --> 00:42:50,222
Oh, shut up!

802
00:42:56,268 --> 00:42:58,942
Villa Capri is not big enough
for both of us, Leo.

803
00:42:59,548 --> 00:43:00,868
If you wanna do somethin' about that,

804
00:43:00,948 --> 00:43:03,144
I'll beat you the best of five
of anything ever invented.

805
00:43:04,508 --> 00:43:06,227
Game room. One hour.

806
00:43:06,868 --> 00:43:08,507
- I'm not getting fired because you...
- Make the call.

807
00:43:08,588 --> 00:43:09,499
...forgot to make the call.

808
00:43:09,588 --> 00:43:10,863
No! I don't care if they call you...

809
00:43:10,948 --> 00:43:12,302
- Oh, good! We're all here.
- Hey!

810
00:43:12,628 --> 00:43:14,699
Time to sharpen the knives,
circle the wagons,

811
00:43:14,788 --> 00:43:16,859
- pull up our bootstraps and buckle down.
- Hey.

812
00:43:16,948 --> 00:43:18,428
It's all here, Miss Quince.

813
00:43:18,508 --> 00:43:20,022
Great. Okay.

814
00:43:20,628 --> 00:43:23,826
So, when exactly does Duke get petty cash?

815
00:43:26,828 --> 00:43:29,787
Wh... whenever he asks for it.
I... I just go and...

816
00:43:30,268 --> 00:43:31,861
Whenever he asks for it?

817
00:43:33,188 --> 00:43:36,818
You know what?
This company is not his personal ATM.

818
00:43:36,908 --> 00:43:39,025
Look, Duke is an honorable man.

819
00:43:39,108 --> 00:43:41,703
I'm sure you're not going
to find anything that... whoa!

820
00:43:41,788 --> 00:43:43,108
Hm, my God!

821
00:43:43,588 --> 00:43:46,627
Honorable. What do you call these?

822
00:43:47,109 --> 00:43:48,338
Size 14, lots of fun.

823
00:43:48,829 --> 00:43:49,899
You want to audit those, too?

824
00:43:50,869 --> 00:43:52,269
You know what? I just might.

825
00:43:53,709 --> 00:43:58,909
Miss Quince will never fall for your...
transparent... dishonor.

826
00:43:58,989 --> 00:44:02,505
My dishonor, I'll have you know,
is not transparent.

827
00:44:14,829 --> 00:44:17,139
- I wonder if he could lift me like that.
- Oh, my...

828
00:44:19,069 --> 00:44:20,708
- In my trap.
- I counter!

829
00:44:26,949 --> 00:44:29,783
This ain't in your wheelhouse, boss.

830
00:44:29,869 --> 00:44:31,781
- Don't go there.
- What do you mean, "Don't go there"?

831
00:44:31,869 --> 00:44:34,543
Your mama said don't go there last night!

832
00:44:35,549 --> 00:44:37,507
- Checkmate!
- Oh!

833
00:44:41,910 --> 00:44:43,185
Oh!

834
00:44:50,310 --> 00:44:51,869
I got it! I got it! I got it! I got it!

835
00:44:53,430 --> 00:44:54,705
- You've got it?
- You got it?

836
00:44:54,790 --> 00:44:56,543
- You got it! You...
- Got it!

837
00:44:57,550 --> 00:44:58,779
- You don't got it.
- Take it.

838
00:44:58,870 --> 00:45:01,226
Take it, take it, take it!

839
00:45:02,190 --> 00:45:03,863
The score is tied, Mr. Diver.

840
00:45:03,950 --> 00:45:05,942
Choose your game to finish this.

841
00:45:07,830 --> 00:45:08,661
Limbo!

842
00:45:08,750 --> 00:45:10,184
- Limbo!
- Wow!

843
00:45:10,270 --> 00:45:11,340
Oh, we got him!

844
00:45:11,470 --> 00:45:12,950
I said stop that!

845
00:45:13,750 --> 00:45:14,740
You first.

846
00:45:20,950 --> 00:45:22,509
He can do it, he can do it!

847
00:45:29,150 --> 00:45:31,108
This is bullshit!

848
00:45:32,151 --> 00:45:35,223
I'll take that as a pass.

849
00:45:35,671 --> 00:45:37,071
Music!

850
00:46:19,831 --> 00:46:20,901
Disqualification!

851
00:46:20,991 --> 00:46:23,461
His knees touched the ground.
I'm starting a protest!

852
00:46:31,752 --> 00:46:34,142
Meet me in your office
tomorrow morning at 9 o'clock.

853
00:46:34,952 --> 00:46:35,783
Sharp.

854
00:46:41,872 --> 00:46:45,024
♪ You, me and a Christmas tree ♪

855
00:46:45,632 --> 00:46:48,227
♪ Is all I want this year ♪

856
00:46:49,032 --> 00:46:52,548
♪ Just me, you and a tree will do ♪

857
00:46:53,272 --> 00:46:55,787
♪ Oh, just to have you near ♪

858
00:46:56,592 --> 00:46:59,790
♪ Beneath the twinkling lights ♪

859
00:47:00,352 --> 00:47:03,106
♪ And shiny colored balls ♪

860
00:47:03,832 --> 00:47:06,791
♪ We'll make our holiday delight ♪

861
00:47:07,952 --> 00:47:10,023
♪ While little pine needles fall ♪

862
00:47:12,912 --> 00:47:13,948
Well, he's late.

863
00:47:14,392 --> 00:47:16,305
That is very unusual.

864
00:47:16,393 --> 00:47:17,713
Duke is very punctual.

865
00:47:18,753 --> 00:47:21,507
Jimmy, Ginger, why don't you guys
take the morning off?

866
00:47:22,433 --> 00:47:24,584
Why don't you not
and just sit right there.

867
00:47:24,673 --> 00:47:27,188
- This is business.
- Oh, come on. A little bit of the bubbly.

868
00:47:27,273 --> 00:47:29,071
Oh, no, that's not appropriate.

869
00:47:30,633 --> 00:47:32,704
Maison de Chocolat...

870
00:47:34,033 --> 00:47:35,547
Come on. Try it.

871
00:47:36,713 --> 00:47:39,308
This... this is about receipts and

872
00:47:39,993 --> 00:47:40,790
and contracts.

873
00:47:40,913 --> 00:47:42,745
Oh, it's nutty and dark.

874
00:47:42,873 --> 00:47:45,945
Maybe I'll take...
I'll take a couple for later.

875
00:47:46,473 --> 00:47:47,304
Thank you.

876
00:47:47,393 --> 00:47:49,305
- Thank you. Thank you very much.
- Good, good, good.

877
00:47:49,393 --> 00:47:52,591
- Now, it, it, it all adds up.
- Oh, no. It doesn't.

878
00:47:53,193 --> 00:47:55,071
Two thousand dollars for camel rental.

879
00:47:57,153 --> 00:47:59,713
How do you think the Three Wise Men
got to Bethlehem?

880
00:48:00,353 --> 00:48:02,948
What does Palm Springs
have to do with Bethlehem?

881
00:48:03,033 --> 00:48:04,945
Bethlehem was just like this.

882
00:48:05,713 --> 00:48:09,674
Palm trees, warm breezes,
people walkin' around in shirtsleeves.

883
00:48:09,754 --> 00:48:14,146
Not this snow-covered bullshit
dreamed up by Hallmark Cards.

884
00:48:14,234 --> 00:48:15,350
I like the snow.

885
00:48:15,874 --> 00:48:19,151
Would you deprive the residents
of Villa Capri of their dromedaries?

886
00:48:19,234 --> 00:48:21,032
Are you a dromedary depriver?

887
00:48:21,114 --> 00:48:22,434
Okay, forget the camels.

888
00:48:24,154 --> 00:48:27,386
The Gentlemen's Club.
Dancers. Right there. Dancers.

889
00:48:27,474 --> 00:48:29,386
Yeah. Well, they were strippers.

890
00:48:29,474 --> 00:48:31,227
Oh, I knew it!

891
00:48:31,314 --> 00:48:32,828
No, no! No, no, no! They were sweet.

892
00:48:32,914 --> 00:48:37,033
They were... they were sweet.
They made the men feel young and virile.

893
00:48:37,274 --> 00:48:39,231
Even taught the ladies
a couple of tricks, and...

894
00:48:39,314 --> 00:48:40,953
- and I can vouch for that.
- Ew.

895
00:48:42,194 --> 00:48:43,423
Golf clubs.

896
00:48:43,514 --> 00:48:45,267
Personal. Fourteen hundred dollars.

897
00:48:45,394 --> 00:48:47,863
Probably brought in
about a million dollars' worth of business

898
00:48:48,474 --> 00:48:51,467
hosting potential buyers
on the golf course.

899
00:48:51,754 --> 00:48:52,585
- Duke...
- Hm?

900
00:48:52,674 --> 00:48:54,427
It's the corporation's petty cash.

901
00:48:55,474 --> 00:48:57,352
You are apparently unfamiliar

902
00:48:57,474 --> 00:49:01,947
with US Tax Codes special addendum 44,
parts three and seven

903
00:49:02,515 --> 00:49:06,395
which define explicitly those,
and I quote,

904
00:49:06,755 --> 00:49:10,305
"reasonable expenses pertaining
to a business's ongoing operation."

905
00:49:10,715 --> 00:49:13,230
- Subparagraph 12, "whereas in the..."
- Stop it!

906
00:49:16,795 --> 00:49:17,706
Okay.

907
00:49:18,195 --> 00:49:20,505
Just... want to know,

908
00:49:21,395 --> 00:49:23,955
are you keeping your heart open for me
like I am for you?

909
00:49:24,035 --> 00:49:26,595
Um, Duke? I don't even know who you are.

910
00:49:27,075 --> 00:49:29,988
Actually, I can't even find
you in the national corporate database.

911
00:49:33,275 --> 00:49:36,188
Oh, well, basically,
if I don't exist, what?

912
00:49:36,275 --> 00:49:39,313
- Does that mean we're finished?
- No, we haven't even started.

913
00:49:40,675 --> 00:49:44,112
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Anyway, I... I gotta go and get ready

914
00:49:44,195 --> 00:49:45,675
- for the big Christmas Eve party.
- Wh... wh...

915
00:49:45,755 --> 00:49:49,954
And have I got a surprise for you!

916
00:49:52,475 --> 00:49:53,591
I don't want a surprise.

917
00:49:54,916 --> 00:49:57,511
- I'm sure it's very nice.
- You shut up!

918
00:50:01,236 --> 00:50:02,829
And now, ladies and gentlemen,

919
00:50:02,916 --> 00:50:04,987
we invite you to please
put your hands together

920
00:50:05,076 --> 00:50:09,912
and give it up
for our beloved leader, Duke Diver.

921
00:50:09,996 --> 00:50:11,316
Hello, everybody.

922
00:50:17,796 --> 00:50:19,116
Merry Christmas!

923
00:50:20,636 --> 00:50:23,629
Mer-ry Christmas!

924
00:50:23,716 --> 00:50:25,116
And I'm saying it like that

925
00:50:25,196 --> 00:50:27,313
because this is really
a special Christmas today,

926
00:50:27,396 --> 00:50:32,266
and I think this is going to be one
you will remember far into your future

927
00:50:32,356 --> 00:50:33,676
which I hope is very long.

928
00:50:35,036 --> 00:50:40,668
But this Christmas is uh, very special
to me because I want to dedicate it.

929
00:50:41,156 --> 00:50:42,954
I want to dedicate it
to a very special lady.

930
00:50:43,036 --> 00:50:45,915
Her name is Miss Suzie Quince,
wherever she is.

931
00:50:46,556 --> 00:50:48,230
There she is!

932
00:50:48,317 --> 00:50:51,116
Miss Quince,
would you mind stepping forward

933
00:50:51,197 --> 00:50:52,392
so we know who you are?

934
00:50:53,397 --> 00:50:55,434
Please, just a couple of steps forward.

935
00:50:56,557 --> 00:50:58,310
Here she is, ladies and gentlemen.

936
00:50:58,797 --> 00:50:59,708
Hi.

937
00:50:59,797 --> 00:51:03,950
On this special day
in this special season, Susan,

938
00:51:04,637 --> 00:51:06,549
I'm dedicating this one to you.

939
00:51:07,557 --> 00:51:08,911
Ladies and gentlemen,

940
00:51:09,997 --> 00:51:11,272
Johnny Mathis!

941
00:51:15,997 --> 00:51:17,750
- Holy shit! Did you see that?
- Atta boy, Dukie!

942
00:51:17,837 --> 00:51:18,987
You did it again!

943
00:51:19,077 --> 00:51:21,751
It's good to see you, my friend.
Welcome, welcome.

944
00:51:22,117 --> 00:51:23,597
I'll be on the piano for you.

945
00:51:23,917 --> 00:51:24,828
This is gonna go well.

946
00:51:25,157 --> 00:51:28,275
Okay. Thank you. Hi, guys. All right.

947
00:51:35,637 --> 00:51:39,597
♪ Sleigh bells ring are ya listenin' ♪

948
00:51:40,037 --> 00:51:43,554
♪ In the lane snow is glistenin' ♪

949
00:51:44,238 --> 00:51:47,595
♪ A beautiful sight we're happy tonight ♪

950
00:51:48,198 --> 00:51:51,077
♪ Walkin' in a winter wonderland... ♪

951
00:51:51,158 --> 00:51:52,717
I'm walkin', baby.

952
00:51:53,198 --> 00:51:58,990
Does Roberta have a little Beyoncé
thing goin' on tonight or am I hammered?

953
00:51:59,078 --> 00:52:01,638
Well, she does, but you are hammered.

954
00:52:01,718 --> 00:52:02,595
Put a ring on it.

955
00:52:02,678 --> 00:52:03,589
Boys...

956
00:52:04,278 --> 00:52:06,838
boys, it's time to make our move.

957
00:52:07,238 --> 00:52:11,437
Ms. Marguerite. You and me?

958
00:52:11,518 --> 00:52:14,238
♪ Then pretend that he is ♪
♪ Parson Brown ♪

959
00:52:15,678 --> 00:52:16,873
Come on.

960
00:52:19,038 --> 00:52:20,677
♪ But you can do the job ♪
♪ When you're in town ♪

961
00:52:20,758 --> 00:52:21,953
I see you.

962
00:52:22,598 --> 00:52:29,311
♪ Later on we'll conspire ♪
♪ As we dream by the fire ♪

963
00:52:30,678 --> 00:52:34,036
♪ To face unafraid ♪
♪ The plans that we made ♪

964
00:52:34,559 --> 00:52:37,597
♪ Walkin' in a winter wonderland ♪

965
00:52:40,839 --> 00:52:44,833
♪ Over the ground lies a mantle of white ♪

966
00:52:45,519 --> 00:52:50,275
♪ A heaven of diamonds ♪
♪ Shine down through the night ♪

967
00:52:51,479 --> 00:52:53,391
Miss Quince, may I have
the pleasure of this dance?

968
00:52:53,479 --> 00:52:54,879
Yes, absolutely.

969
00:52:55,999 --> 00:52:58,992
♪ When it snows ♪

970
00:52:59,079 --> 00:53:00,115
Oh, you're good!

971
00:53:00,479 --> 00:53:01,708
Oh, I'm not that good,

972
00:53:01,799 --> 00:53:04,359
- I just try real hard.
- Yes you are, you're really good.

973
00:53:04,439 --> 00:53:07,716
I've gotta tell ya,
you're light on your feet.

974
00:53:07,799 --> 00:53:11,839
♪ We'll frolic and play ♪
♪ The Eskimo way ♪

975
00:53:12,799 --> 00:53:15,075
Excuse me, excuse me.
Excuse me, excuse me.

976
00:53:15,159 --> 00:53:16,912
- My turn.
- Have some respect for the lady.

977
00:53:16,999 --> 00:53:19,878
- Gentlemen, gentlemen.
- There's only one gentleman here.

978
00:53:20,119 --> 00:53:21,473
Stop the music!

979
00:53:22,679 --> 00:53:24,398
You makin' a fool of yourself, Duke.

980
00:53:25,639 --> 00:53:26,960
I'm callin' your hand.

981
00:53:27,040 --> 00:53:31,671
We're gonna play
18 holes of golf, right?

982
00:53:32,240 --> 00:53:33,754
Winner...

983
00:53:36,200 --> 00:53:38,396
- Christmas morning.
- Bring your A-game.

984
00:53:38,480 --> 00:53:42,030
A-game?
I'm gonna kick your ass with one hand!

985
00:53:44,280 --> 00:53:45,077
Oh, no.

986
00:53:51,400 --> 00:53:53,198
♪ Dashing through the snow ♪

987
00:53:53,280 --> 00:53:55,476
♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪

988
00:53:56,040 --> 00:53:58,077
♪ O'er the fields we go ♪

989
00:53:58,160 --> 00:54:00,959
♪ Laughing all the way ha-ha-ha ♪

990
00:54:01,040 --> 00:54:03,077
♪ Bells on bobtails ring ♪

991
00:54:06,320 --> 00:54:09,074
It's madness. It's all madness.

992
00:54:15,800 --> 00:54:17,678
Leo can play for real.

993
00:54:17,760 --> 00:54:19,036
It doesn't matter. We got your back, boss.

994
00:54:19,121 --> 00:54:21,841
Yeah, even if you're outta bounds,
I got the foot mashie going.

995
00:54:21,921 --> 00:54:25,232
And I got a hole in my pocket
and a half dozen extra balls.

996
00:54:26,401 --> 00:54:28,791
And I got a short game.

997
00:54:28,881 --> 00:54:30,281
We got you rigged to win!

998
00:54:30,361 --> 00:54:31,761
Ah, we got you covered.

999
00:54:31,841 --> 00:54:33,036
I wouldn't even worry about it.

1000
00:54:33,121 --> 00:54:34,874
Cowboy and the playboy.

1001
00:54:35,001 --> 00:54:36,799
- I got my money on the playboy.
- All right, all right.

1002
00:54:37,201 --> 00:54:38,078
Ladies and gentlemen,

1003
00:54:38,161 --> 00:54:41,711
this morning's contest
will be 18 holes of match play golf

1004
00:54:42,241 --> 00:54:46,394
between Mr. Diver and Mr. McKay,
according to official USGA rules.

1005
00:54:46,481 --> 00:54:48,837
Now, I just wanna say before we begin

1006
00:54:48,921 --> 00:54:51,481
that even though
there can only be one winner...

1007
00:54:51,601 --> 00:54:53,558
Oh, shut up!
I think I have the honors here.

1008
00:54:53,761 --> 00:54:54,592
- Yep.
- Oh,

1009
00:54:54,681 --> 00:54:55,592
we're starting to kick it now!

1010
00:55:01,721 --> 00:55:03,075
Oh!

1011
00:55:03,161 --> 00:55:04,356
Son of a bitch!

1012
00:55:04,561 --> 00:55:06,359
Holy!

1013
00:55:07,561 --> 00:55:09,359
All right, baby!

1014
00:55:09,441 --> 00:55:11,114
All right, Duke. Have at it.

1015
00:55:11,842 --> 00:55:13,879
Show us what you got.
Come on, let it rip.

1016
00:55:13,962 --> 00:55:14,873
Quiet, please!

1017
00:55:15,202 --> 00:55:17,637
You don't gotta tell me
to shut up. Let it rip, boss. Let it rip.

1018
00:55:18,602 --> 00:55:22,039
Leo, pay attention. One hand.

1019
00:55:23,562 --> 00:55:24,916
- One hand.
- Waggling.

1020
00:55:25,002 --> 00:55:25,913
Yes.

1021
00:55:26,562 --> 00:55:28,281
Yes! Yes!

1022
00:55:29,162 --> 00:55:30,835
Let's go! Let's go!

1023
00:55:31,162 --> 00:55:33,802
Ow! That's how you do it!

1024
00:55:33,882 --> 00:55:35,680
Right down the fairway!

1025
00:55:40,402 --> 00:55:41,802
- Yes!
- Uh-huh.

1026
00:55:55,882 --> 00:55:58,078
- Yeah! Yeah!
- Feelin' it!

1027
00:56:03,362 --> 00:56:05,594
No, no problem.
I got this, I got this.

1028
00:56:12,643 --> 00:56:13,838
Yes, Duke!

1029
00:56:20,763 --> 00:56:21,674
Settle.

1030
00:56:25,963 --> 00:56:29,718
- Damn, smoother...
- Oh, good break!

1031
00:56:44,363 --> 00:56:45,558
That ball is out of bounds.

1032
00:56:45,643 --> 00:56:47,202
- Huh?
- Out of bounds.

1033
00:56:49,283 --> 00:56:50,956
Lucky bounce. Must have hit a tree.

1034
00:56:54,243 --> 00:56:55,199
Oh!

1035
00:56:55,683 --> 00:56:56,833
Yeah, great shot,
great shot, chief!

1036
00:56:56,923 --> 00:56:58,040
All right, Duke, have at it!

1037
00:56:58,404 --> 00:57:00,236
- Oh, boy.
- You're lookin' real good.

1038
00:57:00,684 --> 00:57:03,722
Oh, cowboy, what you gonna do now, cowboy?

1039
00:57:03,804 --> 00:57:06,603
All right. This is bullshit.

1040
00:57:07,124 --> 00:57:09,320
- What you talkin' about?
- It's bullshit.

1041
00:57:10,164 --> 00:57:13,794
Are you accusing me of conduct
unbecoming a man of my reputation?

1042
00:57:13,884 --> 00:57:17,719
I am accusing you of conduct
consistent with a man of your reputation.

1043
00:57:17,804 --> 00:57:19,158
You been cheatin' all day long.

1044
00:57:21,004 --> 00:57:22,961
And if I'm keepin' the score correctly,

1045
00:57:23,044 --> 00:57:25,718
you will have to hole that ball
on that green to beat me.

1046
00:57:26,484 --> 00:57:27,395
Okay.

1047
00:57:27,924 --> 00:57:28,721
Okay.

1048
00:57:28,844 --> 00:57:29,960
You got this shot.

1049
00:57:30,884 --> 00:57:31,795
Watch this.

1050
00:57:34,084 --> 00:57:35,279
Tell you what, why don't we, uh,

1051
00:57:35,364 --> 00:57:37,321
run up here right quick
and read the green.

1052
00:57:38,364 --> 00:57:39,923
- Great thinking.
- Not so fast.

1053
00:57:40,684 --> 00:57:42,084
I don't trust you and I never will.

1054
00:57:42,404 --> 00:57:43,724
Ah, we plum-bobbing that!

1055
00:57:43,804 --> 00:57:45,557
I'm keepin' my eye on you, man,
just like a hawk.

1056
00:57:46,604 --> 00:57:47,515
God damn!

1057
00:57:48,084 --> 00:57:48,995
Oh shit! Oh shit!

1058
00:57:51,325 --> 00:57:52,281
- Everybody all right?
- Shit!

1059
00:57:52,365 --> 00:57:53,799
They found me! They found me!

1060
00:57:53,885 --> 00:57:55,285
- Everyone's okay.
- Are you okay?

1061
00:57:55,365 --> 00:57:57,482
Stay calm. Stay calm.

1062
00:57:57,565 --> 00:57:59,079
We'll have the EMS here in a minute.

1063
00:57:59,485 --> 00:58:00,396
Holy shit!

1064
00:58:00,885 --> 00:58:02,205
Probably just a gasoline leak.

1065
00:58:02,285 --> 00:58:03,685
It's an electric cart!

1066
00:58:03,765 --> 00:58:05,643
Where's my hat? Where's my hat?

1067
00:58:05,725 --> 00:58:06,602
Where you goin'?

1068
00:58:38,885 --> 00:58:39,955
You want a taste?

1069
00:58:40,405 --> 00:58:42,556
It's Leo, and I don't want a taste.
Open up.

1070
00:58:42,645 --> 00:58:43,557
Leo?

1071
00:58:50,286 --> 00:58:53,006
You forfeit. I win the golf match.

1072
00:58:53,086 --> 00:58:54,805
You can have the damn golf match.

1073
00:58:55,206 --> 00:58:56,322
Somebody wants me dead!

1074
00:58:56,406 --> 00:58:57,726
Who wants you dead? Who are you?

1075
00:58:58,126 --> 00:58:59,037
It... it's, a...

1076
00:58:59,806 --> 00:59:01,763
So, I'm the trophy for a golf match.

1077
00:59:02,846 --> 00:59:05,042
I mean, it's not the first time
men have fought over me.

1078
00:59:05,126 --> 00:59:06,879
Which one of you children is winning?

1079
00:59:06,966 --> 00:59:09,720
No, no, no.
We... we... we're not fighting over you.

1080
00:59:10,006 --> 00:59:11,486
That would be sexist and outrageous.

1081
00:59:11,566 --> 00:59:14,081
No, we're fighting
over the right to court you.

1082
00:59:14,166 --> 00:59:14,997
There's a difference?

1083
00:59:15,086 --> 00:59:17,237
These are fine distinctions that men make.

1084
00:59:17,326 --> 00:59:19,682
Yeah, yeah, we... you misunderstood.

1085
00:59:20,206 --> 00:59:22,641
We honor, praise and glorify you.

1086
00:59:22,726 --> 00:59:24,479
No criminal intent on Duke's part,

1087
00:59:24,566 --> 00:59:25,920
it's just Duke being Duke.

1088
00:59:26,286 --> 00:59:27,117
Thank you, Leo.

1089
00:59:27,206 --> 00:59:28,845
Do you men hear yourselves?

1090
00:59:28,966 --> 00:59:30,798
- No.
- Sh... should we?

1091
00:59:32,326 --> 00:59:34,602
Excuse me. I trust I've made my point.

1092
00:59:36,247 --> 00:59:39,240
Oh, by the way, did you hear a loud boom
a few minutes ago?

1093
00:59:39,567 --> 00:59:42,366
- Uh-uh.
- No, no.

1094
00:59:43,687 --> 00:59:44,598
You?

1095
00:59:45,127 --> 00:59:47,801
Corporate's up my ass
and you're both lying to me.

1096
00:59:49,287 --> 00:59:50,801
You better report this
to the county sheriff.

1097
00:59:50,887 --> 00:59:53,004
Oh, no, no. No, Leo, I beg you.

1098
00:59:53,087 --> 00:59:54,567
Don't take this to the law.

1099
00:59:55,927 --> 00:59:59,284
Leo. Leo! Leo, where you going?

1100
01:00:01,287 --> 01:00:03,085
Leo, it's not safe for me
around here anymore.

1101
01:00:03,167 --> 01:00:05,762
- You've got to get me the hell outta here.
- Why would I do that for you?

1102
01:00:06,367 --> 01:00:08,279
Because you don't want bloody chunks of me

1103
01:00:08,367 --> 01:00:10,279
raining all over Villa Capri!

1104
01:00:10,367 --> 01:00:12,279
All right, I'll get you outta here
but on one condition.

1105
01:00:12,367 --> 01:00:14,598
You tell me everything. No more bullshit.

1106
01:00:14,687 --> 01:00:16,804
Now, why would I bullshit you, Leo?

1107
01:00:16,887 --> 01:00:18,958
Okay. Bloody chunks it is.

1108
01:00:19,047 --> 01:00:22,324
Uh, okay, okay. Okay.
No... no more bullshit.

1109
01:00:23,647 --> 01:00:25,127
You blew up a golf cart?

1110
01:00:25,807 --> 01:00:26,797
And he wasn't in it?

1111
01:00:31,008 --> 01:00:33,762
No, it is not your fault.

1112
01:00:33,848 --> 01:00:36,807
Your... your... your father
never let you murder anyone.

1113
01:00:37,648 --> 01:00:42,643
No, he... he always said
that you did the best digging.

1114
01:00:43,008 --> 01:00:44,283
But sweetheart,

1115
01:00:44,888 --> 01:00:47,926
how many men did you bury
from snakebites and bombs?

1116
01:00:48,568 --> 01:00:49,718
Zero!

1117
01:00:50,088 --> 01:00:51,966
They all died from bullet holes!

1118
01:00:52,048 --> 01:00:56,122
So go get some bullets,
and do it like your father used to do it!

1119
01:01:01,928 --> 01:01:02,918
Who the hell are you?

1120
01:01:03,008 --> 01:01:05,204
My real name is William J. DuPrees.

1121
01:01:06,408 --> 01:01:09,685
I was known for many years as Sweet Willy.

1122
01:01:10,528 --> 01:01:13,726
I was chief counsel for the Bruno family.

1123
01:01:13,808 --> 01:01:14,719
Mob.

1124
01:01:15,048 --> 01:01:19,804
Until I learned that they weren't really
in the trucking business.

1125
01:01:19,888 --> 01:01:23,166
And then Feds came around
and offered me a choice.

1126
01:01:23,249 --> 01:01:25,445
- And?
- I rolled over like a trained show dog.

1127
01:01:25,929 --> 01:01:30,048
The problem was there was this crazy wife
and a crazier son, even,

1128
01:01:30,489 --> 01:01:32,560
who threatened to kill me at the trial.

1129
01:01:33,049 --> 01:01:36,201
And then when the brakes went out
on my car a week later,

1130
01:01:36,689 --> 01:01:38,521
around came the Feds again...

1131
01:01:38,609 --> 01:01:40,043
And you went into witness protection.

1132
01:01:40,129 --> 01:01:43,327
And turned it into an art form,
if I may say so myself.

1133
01:01:44,569 --> 01:01:45,559
Did you ever change your appearance?

1134
01:01:47,609 --> 01:01:48,565
And mess with this?

1135
01:01:49,449 --> 01:01:50,405
I don't think so.

1136
01:01:51,529 --> 01:01:52,406
The Feds will take care of you.

1137
01:01:52,729 --> 01:01:55,198
- Yeah! They'll relocate me.
- So what?

1138
01:01:55,849 --> 01:01:57,681
So, I don't want to be relocated!

1139
01:01:58,729 --> 01:02:00,482
I got it made at the Villa Capri.

1140
01:02:01,089 --> 01:02:03,320
Everything a man could want is there!

1141
01:02:03,409 --> 01:02:06,049
It is my vision that made it
what it is today.

1142
01:02:06,609 --> 01:02:12,048
Sex, booze, golf... and then you die.

1143
01:02:12,289 --> 01:02:14,167
Heaven's gonna be
a disappointment to you, man.

1144
01:02:14,249 --> 01:02:17,687
Come on, Leo.
Help me save what I've built.

1145
01:02:21,610 --> 01:02:23,124
- Shit!
- Nobody messes with my truck!

1146
01:02:24,290 --> 01:02:25,201
Shot my truck!

1147
01:02:25,290 --> 01:02:27,850
Oh, hell! He's tryin' to kill me
and you're worried about a truck?

1148
01:02:27,930 --> 01:02:28,841
Hang on.

1149
01:02:42,650 --> 01:02:43,561
Shit! Shit!

1150
01:02:54,250 --> 01:02:55,286
Shit!

1151
01:03:02,130 --> 01:03:04,247
Let's just regroup
and... and... and make a plan.

1152
01:03:04,330 --> 01:03:05,969
I'm gonna cut the sumbitch off.

1153
01:03:19,051 --> 01:03:22,123
- This is a really bad idea, Leo.
- Watch this.

1154
01:03:26,851 --> 01:03:29,810
Nice work, Leo.
Glad I didn't blink.

1155
01:03:31,611 --> 01:03:33,250
Damn it.

1156
01:03:37,771 --> 01:03:42,084
This is my brand-new, F-150, 4x4,

1157
01:03:42,171 --> 01:03:47,371
ruby red, extended cab,
custom bedliner truck!

1158
01:03:50,531 --> 01:03:53,729
I guess we're going to have to inform
Miss Quince of these developments.

1159
01:03:53,811 --> 01:03:56,371
Yeah. Her job's at stake.

1160
01:04:06,852 --> 01:04:08,525
You got a special feelin' for her,
don't you?

1161
01:04:08,972 --> 01:04:10,531
From the moment I first saw her,

1162
01:04:10,612 --> 01:04:12,444
there was something
about Miss Suzie Quince

1163
01:04:12,532 --> 01:04:15,092
that got the hair
on the back of my neck standing up.

1164
01:04:16,732 --> 01:04:17,688
Nothin' finer.

1165
01:04:18,292 --> 01:04:20,568
In the whole wide world than a good woman.

1166
01:04:21,212 --> 01:04:23,522
I dig the female species...

1167
01:04:23,612 --> 01:04:25,046
Smells sweeter than a honeysuckle.

1168
01:04:25,132 --> 01:04:27,931
Smarter than hell, firm as a biscuit.

1169
01:04:28,292 --> 01:04:29,203
Firm as a biscuit?

1170
01:04:29,492 --> 01:04:32,212
Biscuit, fresh out of the oven.

1171
01:04:32,532 --> 01:04:36,651
Oh, yeah. Butter melting.

1172
01:04:37,572 --> 01:04:39,928
- You see my point.
- Ah, yes, indeed.

1173
01:04:40,572 --> 01:04:45,408
The sun, the moon, and the stars, Leo.
That's what a good woman is to me.

1174
01:04:45,492 --> 01:04:51,966
♪ Hark the herald angels sing ♪
♪ Glory to the newborn king ♪

1175
01:04:52,532 --> 01:04:59,087
♪ Peace on Earth and mercy mild ♪
♪ God and sinners reconciled ♪

1176
01:05:02,533 --> 01:05:03,444
Go on.

1177
01:05:04,573 --> 01:05:05,404
What goes next?

1178
01:05:08,053 --> 01:05:08,964
With.

1179
01:05:09,933 --> 01:05:11,253
What is it? With...

1180
01:05:12,053 --> 01:05:13,533
Romantic joy proclaim?

1181
01:05:14,373 --> 01:05:15,489
Proclaim.

1182
01:05:15,933 --> 01:05:19,085
♪ Christ was born in Bethlehem ♪

1183
01:05:19,653 --> 01:05:22,691
♪ Hark! the herald angels sing ♪

1184
01:05:22,933 --> 01:05:27,644
♪ Glory to the newborn king ♪

1185
01:05:29,533 --> 01:05:32,367
You had a rifle and a scope
and you missed him?

1186
01:05:34,013 --> 01:05:36,573
Oh, Oscar,
just stop trying to kill him.

1187
01:05:36,653 --> 01:05:38,133
Just bring him to me and I'll do it.

1188
01:05:46,254 --> 01:05:48,689
Why am I not surprised
you're in witness protection

1189
01:05:48,814 --> 01:05:50,043
and somebody's trying to kill you?

1190
01:05:50,534 --> 01:05:52,730
- Yep, that's him. Yeah.
- The animal guy, right there.

1191
01:05:53,174 --> 01:05:56,167
Sheep. Camels.
Did they have a snake? Probably.

1192
01:05:57,254 --> 01:05:59,291
I thought he looked vaguely familiar.

1193
01:06:00,174 --> 01:06:01,369
Now I recognize him.

1194
01:06:01,934 --> 01:06:05,052
That's Oscar Bruno,
one of the mob boss's sons.

1195
01:06:05,814 --> 01:06:07,885
He could have
just knocked on your door and shot you.

1196
01:06:07,974 --> 01:06:10,170
Surveillance cameras.
He didn't wanna be ID'd.

1197
01:06:10,294 --> 01:06:12,763
No. He figured he could just come
and go with the animals.

1198
01:06:15,214 --> 01:06:17,012
Leo wants to turn me over to the Feds.

1199
01:06:18,214 --> 01:06:19,807
Oh, God! No, please.

1200
01:06:20,254 --> 01:06:23,884
Tell the police, and suddenly
the Villa Capri is crawling with cops!

1201
01:06:24,014 --> 01:06:27,086
I mean, can't you just, like,
track him down?

1202
01:06:27,174 --> 01:06:28,244
He's a bad guy. Just...

1203
01:06:28,934 --> 01:06:31,608
you know, snuff him out
like way off the radar.

1204
01:06:31,694 --> 01:06:34,254
I don't snuff people out,
off or on the radar.

1205
01:06:34,574 --> 01:06:36,088
Oh, God. I know.

1206
01:06:37,774 --> 01:06:40,131
Okay, guys, look, I... I have a confession.

1207
01:06:41,335 --> 01:06:44,692
The last couple times corporate sent me
to fix a problem,

1208
01:06:44,775 --> 01:06:47,734
something crazy happened.
Things got worse.

1209
01:06:48,855 --> 01:06:52,974
I'm starting to like this place,
but I'm on a short leash here.

1210
01:06:53,455 --> 01:06:55,765
If this gets public,
it could cost me my job.

1211
01:06:57,055 --> 01:06:59,615
Please... Leo...

1212
01:06:59,695 --> 01:07:01,527
And, he shot your damn truck.

1213
01:07:01,975 --> 01:07:04,171
- Hmm.
- He shot your truck?

1214
01:07:04,615 --> 01:07:08,086
You're both right.
We're goin' after this guy.

1215
01:07:08,655 --> 01:07:09,611
Yes!

1216
01:07:19,455 --> 01:07:20,775
What the hell is this about?

1217
01:07:20,855 --> 01:07:23,893
He knows my new truck,
but he doesn't know this shitty van.

1218
01:07:23,975 --> 01:07:26,206
Oh.

1219
01:07:26,735 --> 01:07:27,771
That's clever.

1220
01:07:28,415 --> 01:07:31,135
I think you and I could become
cherished friends, Leo.

1221
01:07:31,215 --> 01:07:32,127
Shut up.

1222
01:08:04,816 --> 01:08:06,216
Fit perfect in a golf bag.

1223
01:08:06,816 --> 01:08:07,727
Can I help you guys?

1224
01:08:08,656 --> 01:08:11,012
- Can they get out?
- Yep, every now and then.

1225
01:08:11,416 --> 01:08:12,611
You might wanna think
about a deeper trough.

1226
01:08:13,216 --> 01:08:15,333
Deeper trough. Yeah, good thinkin'.

1227
01:08:15,856 --> 01:08:17,290
Duke, what brings you out here?

1228
01:08:17,576 --> 01:08:19,966
Were, uh, lookin' for a guy.

1229
01:08:21,376 --> 01:08:23,447
Oscar. Strange fella.

1230
01:08:23,776 --> 01:08:24,608
Where is he now?

1231
01:08:24,697 --> 01:08:25,847
He quit yesterday.

1232
01:08:26,657 --> 01:08:30,287
Said he had found what
he was lookin' for and walked out.

1233
01:08:30,377 --> 01:08:31,288
Leave an address?

1234
01:08:31,537 --> 01:08:33,290
He lived in a motel, I think.

1235
01:08:33,857 --> 01:08:36,770
- Motel...
- You got any idea which motel?

1236
01:08:37,417 --> 01:08:40,251
- Made it sound like the French Quarter.
- French Quarter?

1237
01:08:40,337 --> 01:08:41,293
- Something like that.
- Got it.

1238
01:08:47,337 --> 01:08:49,056
Manager says he's still livin' here.

1239
01:08:49,777 --> 01:08:50,688
Unit 15.

1240
01:08:51,017 --> 01:08:53,691
So when he shows up, we jump him,

1241
01:08:53,977 --> 01:08:55,491
we hand him over to the Feds,

1242
01:08:55,577 --> 01:08:57,773
and he goes up the river forever, right?

1243
01:08:57,857 --> 01:09:00,053
- No, no. We don't jump him.
- What do you mean?

1244
01:09:00,297 --> 01:09:01,208
I do.

1245
01:09:03,337 --> 01:09:05,806
- So just relax.
- Yeah, okay...

1246
01:09:12,097 --> 01:09:14,054
Sixth grade was traumatic.

1247
01:09:14,937 --> 01:09:16,371
I ran for class president.

1248
01:09:17,898 --> 01:09:18,809
Lost.

1249
01:09:19,458 --> 01:09:23,691
I got one vote... my own.

1250
01:09:23,778 --> 01:09:27,488
In high school,
I tried bribing my classmates, but...

1251
01:09:28,138 --> 01:09:29,128
Crushed again.

1252
01:09:29,898 --> 01:09:30,854
Yeah.

1253
01:09:31,178 --> 01:09:33,215
Witness protection turned my life around.

1254
01:09:34,018 --> 01:09:36,533
You got a fresh start
on the back nine of life.

1255
01:09:37,178 --> 01:09:38,692
Reinvented myself.

1256
01:09:39,938 --> 01:09:41,895
Was goin' pretty good, if you ask me.

1257
01:09:42,778 --> 01:09:44,371
You like me a little, yes?

1258
01:09:44,458 --> 01:09:45,858
You need to be liked?

1259
01:09:46,618 --> 01:09:48,689
It may sound pathetic but,

1260
01:09:49,738 --> 01:09:51,172
I love to be adored.

1261
01:09:51,738 --> 01:09:52,649
You need therapy.

1262
01:09:53,738 --> 01:09:54,774
Never worked before.

1263
01:09:56,738 --> 01:09:58,491
Not until now with you.

1264
01:09:59,418 --> 01:10:01,216
Good. You're cured.

1265
01:10:03,418 --> 01:10:06,650
We should rotate naps
in case it turns into an all-nighter.

1266
01:10:07,218 --> 01:10:10,017
Yeah. Well, I'm wide awake
if you wanna take the first one.

1267
01:10:10,699 --> 01:10:12,213
I could nod off pretty quick.

1268
01:10:12,579 --> 01:10:13,490
Well...

1269
01:10:13,779 --> 01:10:17,170
Wake me in one hour
or if anybody shows up.

1270
01:10:25,819 --> 01:10:28,175
- Would you like a song to help you sleep?
- No.

1271
01:10:34,899 --> 01:10:39,576
♪ Silent night ♪

1272
01:10:40,739 --> 01:10:44,813
♪ Holy night ♪

1273
01:10:45,379 --> 01:10:46,290
I like that one.

1274
01:10:47,459 --> 01:10:52,215
♪ All is calm ♪

1275
01:10:53,139 --> 01:10:57,213
♪ All is bright ♪

1276
01:12:16,981 --> 01:12:18,734
- Wake up, Sherlock.
- Hm?

1277
01:12:19,141 --> 01:12:20,461
You were supposed to wake me up.

1278
01:12:21,941 --> 01:12:22,852
Sorry.

1279
01:12:23,461 --> 01:12:25,373
That song always leaves me out.

1280
01:12:30,581 --> 01:12:31,492
Can I help you?

1281
01:12:31,821 --> 01:12:33,972
Yeah, the guy in room 15,
what do you know about him?

1282
01:12:34,421 --> 01:12:36,458
A very nice man. Very polite.

1283
01:12:36,541 --> 01:12:37,452
Bullshit.

1284
01:12:37,741 --> 01:12:40,336
There is one thing.
He... loves naked ladies.

1285
01:12:41,021 --> 01:12:43,058
I saw him at last week's
Sunday brunch at Rudy's.

1286
01:12:43,381 --> 01:12:44,861
They have a Sunday brunch at a titty bar?

1287
01:12:45,741 --> 01:12:47,494
You gotta try the Belgian waffles there.

1288
01:12:51,302 --> 01:12:54,898
Okay. All right. Go do your business.
Go on, Romeo.

1289
01:12:55,102 --> 01:12:57,617
- That's a good boy! Good boy!
- Hey, Suzie?

1290
01:12:58,662 --> 01:12:59,493
Suzie?

1291
01:12:59,582 --> 01:13:01,460
- Yeah?
- It's corporate for you.

1292
01:13:01,542 --> 01:13:03,101
It's corporate?

1293
01:13:08,902 --> 01:13:09,892
Suzie Quince.

1294
01:13:11,262 --> 01:13:12,173
Yes!

1295
01:13:13,502 --> 01:13:14,936
No, no, no...

1296
01:13:15,222 --> 01:13:17,214
I... I'm getting a handle on things.

1297
01:13:17,302 --> 01:13:18,531
A firm grasp.

1298
01:13:22,502 --> 01:13:24,414
♪ Holy night ♪

1299
01:13:24,902 --> 01:13:27,815
No. I... there are protocols.
I'm following the protocols.

1300
01:13:27,902 --> 01:13:30,258
I'm a... I'm a walking protocol.

1301
01:13:34,822 --> 01:13:38,179
But people just seem to be so happy here,

1302
01:13:38,262 --> 01:13:42,542
and happiness is not a condition.
It's a choice.

1303
01:13:47,703 --> 01:13:49,979
Things are not out of control
at the Villa Capri.

1304
01:13:50,063 --> 01:13:51,179
It is magnificent here.

1305
01:13:55,463 --> 01:13:57,136
No, no, no! Stop! Come back!

1306
01:13:57,503 --> 01:14:01,053
Terminate me? You can't terminate me!

1307
01:14:01,143 --> 01:14:03,021
Come back with the nativity!

1308
01:14:03,223 --> 01:14:04,657
No, wait! Stop, get back in there!

1309
01:14:04,743 --> 01:14:06,063
Larry, get the camel!

1310
01:14:07,503 --> 01:14:08,414
You know what?

1311
01:14:08,903 --> 01:14:10,019
Hello?

1312
01:14:13,143 --> 01:14:14,054
Romeo?

1313
01:14:14,863 --> 01:14:16,092
Oh, Romeo?

1314
01:14:17,143 --> 01:14:19,817
Oh, my God! Romeo. Romeo!

1315
01:14:19,903 --> 01:14:23,817
Oh, no, no, no, no!

1316
01:14:23,903 --> 01:14:25,622
- Hey!
- Oh! Oh!

1317
01:14:25,703 --> 01:14:26,853
I got you!

1318
01:14:32,583 --> 01:14:33,812
You know, this isn't
a very efficient plan.

1319
01:14:33,903 --> 01:14:34,815
You shut up!

1320
01:14:35,104 --> 01:14:37,903
You shut up! I'm having
a worse day than you are.

1321
01:14:38,544 --> 01:14:42,333
You know, if I were to ever kidnap
someone for ransom,

1322
01:14:42,584 --> 01:14:45,383
I would have it more worked out,
more organized.

1323
01:14:45,944 --> 01:14:47,378
I mean, there would be some nice kibble,

1324
01:14:47,464 --> 01:14:48,580
and perhaps a chew toy.

1325
01:14:48,664 --> 01:14:49,859
- I'm going to tell you why.
- Chew toy?

1326
01:14:49,944 --> 01:14:51,981
Oh God! It's amateur hour around here.

1327
01:14:52,064 --> 01:14:52,975
Well, I'm sorry.

1328
01:14:59,304 --> 01:15:01,455
All right, all right. Enough about me.

1329
01:15:01,944 --> 01:15:04,823
I'm sure even a tough guy like you

1330
01:15:04,904 --> 01:15:07,464
has some insecurities
you'd like to talk about.

1331
01:15:07,544 --> 01:15:08,455
No.

1332
01:15:09,304 --> 01:15:11,773
Come on. You'll feel better.

1333
01:15:11,864 --> 01:15:13,298
Shut up! I feel fine.

1334
01:15:17,504 --> 01:15:18,824
- They've got a nice gift shop.
- Hey!

1335
01:15:18,904 --> 01:15:19,735
Really sweet.

1336
01:15:19,824 --> 01:15:21,144
Hey, there's the big dog!

1337
01:15:21,224 --> 01:15:22,135
- Hey.
- Hey, what's up?

1338
01:15:22,224 --> 01:15:23,419
- We're lookin' for somebody.
- Yeah?

1339
01:15:23,504 --> 01:15:26,815
- Recognize this guy?
- Doesn't look familiar, but, uh, you know,

1340
01:15:27,104 --> 01:15:28,983
a thousand other guys like that...

1341
01:15:32,625 --> 01:15:34,503
Your animal guy
is not very good at blowin' you up,

1342
01:15:34,585 --> 01:15:36,781
but he's gonna keep tryin'.
Maybe he'll get it right next time.

1343
01:15:37,265 --> 01:15:39,143
- Hey, hey, hey!
- Is that your car?

1344
01:15:39,225 --> 01:15:40,295
- Yeah.
- Give me the keys.

1345
01:15:40,385 --> 01:15:41,899
- My new wheels? No!
- I need your keys.

1346
01:15:41,985 --> 01:15:43,339
- Who do you think you are?
- Give me the keys!

1347
01:15:43,425 --> 01:15:44,575
Shit!

1348
01:15:55,305 --> 01:15:57,422
- This is thrilling.
- Thank you.

1349
01:15:58,385 --> 01:15:59,421
- There he is.
- Yep.

1350
01:16:01,385 --> 01:16:02,455
Goddamn, Leo!

1351
01:16:07,305 --> 01:16:09,865
Two old dinosaurs. Like us, huh, Leo?

1352
01:16:12,065 --> 01:16:13,499
- You think that's funny?
- Nope.

1353
01:16:21,706 --> 01:16:22,617
Hang on.

1354
01:16:25,906 --> 01:16:27,226
Oh shit! Oh shit!

1355
01:16:32,546 --> 01:16:34,139
I have a confession to make.

1356
01:16:35,146 --> 01:16:38,662
Well, for heaven's sake, man, let 'er rip.

1357
01:16:39,066 --> 01:16:40,625
I came here to buy the Villa Capri.

1358
01:16:43,146 --> 01:16:44,580
I thought you only bought big stuff.

1359
01:16:44,666 --> 01:16:46,464
That property is worth 50 million dollars.

1360
01:16:47,066 --> 01:16:50,503
Fifty... and Suzie's worried
about petty cash?

1361
01:16:50,586 --> 01:16:52,305
She's just doin' her job... Hang on!

1362
01:16:52,386 --> 01:16:53,297
Oh shit!

1363
01:16:54,266 --> 01:16:55,985
First, I was gonna bulldoze
the Villa Capri

1364
01:16:56,066 --> 01:16:57,785
and put in a western Mall of America.

1365
01:16:57,866 --> 01:16:59,983
Oh my God! That's sacrilege.

1366
01:17:00,066 --> 01:17:02,786
Don't worry. I changed my mind.
I'm startin' to like that place.

1367
01:17:11,106 --> 01:17:14,498
So, I mean, if it's worth all that

1368
01:17:14,867 --> 01:17:16,381
and it's partly because of me,

1369
01:17:16,467 --> 01:17:18,060
I think I should get a piece of the pie.

1370
01:17:18,147 --> 01:17:19,058
How much do you want?

1371
01:17:19,387 --> 01:17:21,424
Uh, eh, ten percent?

1372
01:17:21,507 --> 01:17:23,624
Suppose I let you keep
your fancy golf cart?

1373
01:17:24,307 --> 01:17:25,582
Wait a minute... They blew that thing up.

1374
01:17:25,667 --> 01:17:27,420
And you're welcome to have a piece of it.

1375
01:17:30,827 --> 01:17:32,944
Looks like Oscar
is through playing around.

1376
01:17:40,427 --> 01:17:42,259
- Uh-oh!
- This looks like a dead end.

1377
01:17:42,347 --> 01:17:44,498
Yeah. Road don't go anywhere.

1378
01:17:44,587 --> 01:17:45,703
Maybe we can box him in.

1379
01:17:46,027 --> 01:17:46,938
Well, it might be a trap.

1380
01:17:47,307 --> 01:17:48,138
So what?

1381
01:17:48,227 --> 01:17:49,422
They're after your ass, not mine.

1382
01:18:10,948 --> 01:18:11,779
That's not Oscar.

1383
01:18:11,868 --> 01:18:13,746
Well, let's go see who the hell it is.

1384
01:18:19,828 --> 01:18:21,501
- You know what you're doin'?
- Generally.

1385
01:18:22,068 --> 01:18:23,468
Stop right there!

1386
01:18:24,308 --> 01:18:26,061
No, no, no, no! Don't shoot, don't shoot.

1387
01:18:26,148 --> 01:18:27,059
Who are you?

1388
01:18:27,188 --> 01:18:30,022
Listen, some lunatic gave me $500
to torch your van

1389
01:18:30,668 --> 01:18:31,624
and to lead you down here.

1390
01:18:32,068 --> 01:18:32,979
Here?

1391
01:18:33,188 --> 01:18:34,099
Yeah.

1392
01:18:37,148 --> 01:18:38,377
Answer the phone.

1393
01:18:42,108 --> 01:18:43,019
Hello?

1394
01:18:45,788 --> 01:18:46,699
It's for you.

1395
01:18:51,748 --> 01:18:52,659
Leo McKay.

1396
01:18:53,028 --> 01:18:53,905
Look up.

1397
01:19:03,509 --> 01:19:04,499
You're lookin' for me?

1398
01:19:05,229 --> 01:19:06,140
What do you want?

1399
01:19:07,309 --> 01:19:08,220
I got your girl.

1400
01:19:08,829 --> 01:19:10,183
I wanna trade her for Duke.

1401
01:19:10,709 --> 01:19:11,984
- That'll work.
- What?

1402
01:19:12,949 --> 01:19:14,588
No, Leo. He'll shoot me in the head.

1403
01:19:14,829 --> 01:19:15,899
Yeah, well, there is that.

1404
01:19:16,349 --> 01:19:17,499
What do you want us to do?

1405
01:19:17,829 --> 01:19:20,867
I want you to sit tight and I'll send you
coordinates of where we'll meet up.

1406
01:19:22,109 --> 01:19:23,020
Leo?

1407
01:19:24,909 --> 01:19:27,868
You're not really gonna trade me
for her, are you?

1408
01:19:27,949 --> 01:19:30,418
She's a lot prettier
and I'd really like to make the trade,

1409
01:19:30,509 --> 01:19:33,627
but my essential sense
of human dignity and decency

1410
01:19:33,709 --> 01:19:34,620
will not permit it.

1411
01:19:35,589 --> 01:19:37,148
However, we need him to think I will.

1412
01:19:37,469 --> 01:19:41,509
Aw, I sure am glad you're you.

1413
01:19:46,789 --> 01:19:50,669
- Hey, can I put my hands down now?
- Shut up.

1414
01:20:01,390 --> 01:20:02,187
Where?

1415
01:20:02,270 --> 01:20:04,466
Utah Trail toward 29 Palms.

1416
01:20:05,030 --> 01:20:06,669
Turn off at the old water tower.

1417
01:20:06,750 --> 01:20:07,661
You know where that is?

1418
01:20:07,750 --> 01:20:08,581
Not a clue.

1419
01:20:08,670 --> 01:20:10,229
How the hell are we supposed to find that?

1420
01:20:10,590 --> 01:20:11,501
Waze.

1421
01:20:12,830 --> 01:20:13,741
God!

1422
01:20:14,710 --> 01:20:15,621
What the hell is that?

1423
01:20:16,070 --> 01:20:17,504
It's an app. You can download it.

1424
01:20:18,070 --> 01:20:18,981
Really?

1425
01:20:21,910 --> 01:20:23,867
Let's get started. Drive safe.

1426
01:20:25,470 --> 01:20:27,029
I have another confession to make.

1427
01:20:27,790 --> 01:20:28,667
Let 'er rip.

1428
01:20:29,510 --> 01:20:31,342
I was married for 33 years...

1429
01:20:31,990 --> 01:20:34,221
to the first woman I ever fell for.

1430
01:20:34,950 --> 01:20:36,589
She died about six years ago,

1431
01:20:36,670 --> 01:20:37,990
and it put me off my game.

1432
01:20:38,070 --> 01:20:40,983
After three or four years,
I felt I should see other women,

1433
01:20:41,070 --> 01:20:42,345
but it didn't feel right.

1434
01:20:44,230 --> 01:20:45,665
You wanna tell Duke about it?

1435
01:20:45,751 --> 01:20:50,268
There's something about Miss Quince
that just shook me out of my malaise.

1436
01:20:50,351 --> 01:20:52,343
She's gorgeous, of course, but she's...

1437
01:20:52,671 --> 01:20:53,946
There's nothin' frivolous about her.

1438
01:20:54,031 --> 01:20:57,069
She's a woman of...
substance and gravitas.

1439
01:20:57,791 --> 01:20:58,702
Gravitas.

1440
01:21:00,991 --> 01:21:03,347
Put me down, you jackass!

1441
01:21:03,711 --> 01:21:05,987
Where's my dog? Romeo!

1442
01:21:06,391 --> 01:21:07,666
Where's my dog?

1443
01:21:08,191 --> 01:21:10,547
Now doesn't all this sharing
make you feel better, huh?

1444
01:21:10,951 --> 01:21:12,829
I could fall in love with her.

1445
01:21:18,111 --> 01:21:21,183
In 0. 1 mile keep left.

1446
01:21:40,392 --> 01:21:42,349
You know, you're always the hero.

1447
01:21:43,192 --> 01:21:46,151
I think I'd like to be heroic sometime.

1448
01:21:52,472 --> 01:21:54,065
How heroic do you wanna be?

1449
01:21:55,032 --> 01:21:55,943
Hm?

1450
01:21:56,672 --> 01:21:57,583
Um...

1451
01:21:58,752 --> 01:21:59,663
Well...

1452
01:21:59,792 --> 01:22:01,829
Uh, you know, just...

1453
01:22:02,792 --> 01:22:04,431
Moderately. Just enough.

1454
01:22:05,072 --> 01:22:06,825
You wanna keep
your braggin' rights to the women.

1455
01:22:08,432 --> 01:22:10,151
You know me well. Yeah, huh?

1456
01:22:13,992 --> 01:22:16,746
You think that's an honorable reason
to wanna be heroic?

1457
01:22:16,832 --> 01:22:17,743
I do.

1458
01:22:22,992 --> 01:22:23,869
I got a plan.

1459
01:22:24,232 --> 01:22:27,669
You know, you remind me of my mother.

1460
01:22:27,752 --> 01:22:32,589
- That's so sweet.
- Yeah. All right.

1461
01:22:34,233 --> 01:22:35,144
All right.

1462
01:22:50,913 --> 01:22:52,142
This is where it begins.

1463
01:23:05,193 --> 01:23:06,547
You all right in there, Suzie?

1464
01:23:06,993 --> 01:23:09,986
- Leo, I'm okay.
- I am not armed.

1465
01:23:10,473 --> 01:23:12,590
I am here to give you what you want.

1466
01:23:13,793 --> 01:23:15,022
And to take what I want.

1467
01:23:15,113 --> 01:23:16,433
Hey, stand right there!

1468
01:23:17,553 --> 01:23:18,669
What you got under that hat?

1469
01:23:19,353 --> 01:23:20,343
A little hair.

1470
01:23:20,433 --> 01:23:23,472
Ha! You send me Willy.

1471
01:23:28,194 --> 01:23:30,390
We can work this out
to everybody's satisfaction.

1472
01:23:30,754 --> 01:23:33,144
Why don't you put the gun down
and we'll talk.

1473
01:23:46,394 --> 01:23:47,464
Give me Duke!

1474
01:23:48,394 --> 01:23:52,024
Damn! You shot my truck
and now you're tryin' to shoot my boots!

1475
01:23:52,114 --> 01:23:56,631
You give me Duke or Willy
or whatever he calls himself. Now!

1476
01:23:56,754 --> 01:23:58,950
You can have him.
I never liked him anyway.

1477
01:24:08,594 --> 01:24:09,505
Oh.

1478
01:24:10,074 --> 01:24:10,985
Ha!

1479
01:24:16,555 --> 01:24:17,705
Oh! That hurts!

1480
01:24:18,155 --> 01:24:20,750
He shot me!

1481
01:24:24,635 --> 01:24:26,467
Bye-bye.

1482
01:24:30,475 --> 01:24:32,626
Christmases seem to blur together.

1483
01:24:32,995 --> 01:24:34,873
You know? This one stands out.

1484
01:24:35,115 --> 01:24:36,310
It's startin' to feel special.

1485
01:24:37,995 --> 01:24:39,634
We're gonna have to call
the sheriff now.

1486
01:24:39,755 --> 01:24:43,032
I don't know about you guys,
but I sure could use a cocktail.

1487
01:24:43,115 --> 01:24:43,946
Here, here.

1488
01:24:55,475 --> 01:24:58,752
I'm starting to understand
the affection you have for this place,

1489
01:24:59,115 --> 01:25:00,105
whoever you are.

1490
01:25:00,835 --> 01:25:03,191
To you, Sweet Willy.

1491
01:25:03,595 --> 01:25:05,951
You did a brave thing today.
I didn't think you had it in you.

1492
01:25:06,035 --> 01:25:08,675
- And you saved the day, cousin.
- I ain't your cousin.

1493
01:25:08,755 --> 01:25:10,588
Well, but you like me a little, huh?

1494
01:25:13,516 --> 01:25:15,348
A little.

1495
01:25:16,676 --> 01:25:17,632
There goes Rudolph.

1496
01:25:18,316 --> 01:25:22,515
And there goes Snoopy.

1497
01:25:22,596 --> 01:25:23,586
Adios, Snoopy.

1498
01:25:30,356 --> 01:25:33,190
Hey! It's New Year's in New York.
Happy New Year, everybody!

1499
01:25:33,276 --> 01:25:34,630
Earlier to bed?

1500
01:25:35,076 --> 01:25:38,194
Uh, with any luck,
maybe two balls will drop tonight.

1501
01:25:38,756 --> 01:25:40,793
Girl, you are delusional.

1502
01:25:40,876 --> 01:25:43,948
Hey, I've never seen you guys
lookin' so sharp.

1503
01:25:44,036 --> 01:25:47,950
- Or you so beautiful.
- To the ladies and ladies.

1504
01:25:50,556 --> 01:25:55,108
Arturo, Miss Quince, I think you know my
cronies and their lovely ladies.

1505
01:25:55,196 --> 01:25:57,392
- Of course I do. Happy New Year.
- Happy New Year.

1506
01:25:57,476 --> 01:25:59,149
Happy New Year.

1507
01:25:59,236 --> 01:26:00,113
Happy New Year!

1508
01:26:00,196 --> 01:26:02,507
I think it's about midnight
in Times Square.

1509
01:26:02,597 --> 01:26:03,508
Oh, yeah!

1510
01:26:05,557 --> 01:26:07,628
Nine o'clock in California
is good enough for me.

1511
01:26:09,077 --> 01:26:11,876
At the end of the day, I have to admit,
I have a soft spot for Duke.

1512
01:26:11,957 --> 01:26:14,313
Wherever they're relocating him,
do you think he's going to be okay?

1513
01:26:14,397 --> 01:26:18,437
My dear, the Duke will always be okay.

1514
01:26:18,517 --> 01:26:19,348
Yeah.

1515
01:26:19,437 --> 01:26:20,553
Strike up the band, boys.

1516
01:26:21,957 --> 01:26:25,348
♪ May old acquaintance be forgot ♪

1517
01:26:25,597 --> 01:26:26,872
Ladies and gentlemen of the

1518
01:26:26,957 --> 01:26:29,188
Tropical Resort Retirement Community,

1519
01:26:29,597 --> 01:26:31,748
say hello to your new resident manager,

1520
01:26:32,517 --> 01:26:34,236
Mr. Marvel Bigelow.

1521
01:26:34,317 --> 01:26:35,387
Music!

1522
01:27:19,198 --> 01:27:23,477
♪ Christmas ♪

1523
01:27:24,678 --> 01:27:29,434
♪ Is a very special time of the year ♪

1524
01:27:31,238 --> 01:27:35,790
♪ It's a precious time ♪
♪ And I'm waiting here ♪

1525
01:27:36,798 --> 01:27:42,112
♪ Can't wait to get close to you ♪

1526
01:27:46,318 --> 01:27:50,074
♪ Christmas ♪

1527
01:27:51,239 --> 01:27:57,110
♪ Is a house adorned ♪
♪ With tinsel and lights ♪

1528
01:27:58,159 --> 01:28:02,756
♪ It's a cozy fire and long quiet night ♪

1529
01:28:03,719 --> 01:28:09,158
♪ That let me get close to you ♪

1530
01:28:12,559 --> 01:28:16,599
♪ No one else, dear, will do ♪

1531
01:28:17,079 --> 01:28:20,117
♪ Darling you, only you ♪

1532
01:28:20,199 --> 01:28:25,115
♪ Make my holiday list ♪

1533
01:28:26,239 --> 01:28:29,949
♪ I can't wait till we've kissed ♪

1534
01:28:30,039 --> 01:28:32,952
♪ And then everything that follows ♪

1535
01:28:33,039 --> 01:28:36,271
♪ Makes my year every December ♪

1536
01:28:36,359 --> 01:28:40,718
♪ Don't forget to remember ♪

1537
01:28:40,800 --> 01:28:44,430
♪ That Christmas ♪

1538
01:28:45,520 --> 01:28:50,549
♪ Is two lovers strolling home ♪
♪ In the snow ♪

1539
01:28:51,760 --> 01:28:56,277
♪ And then warming up ♪
♪ The best way they know ♪

1540
01:28:57,680 --> 01:29:04,678
♪ Oh, let me get close to you ♪

1541
01:29:06,800 --> 01:29:10,396
♪ 'Cause you're all I want for Christmas ♪

1542
01:29:12,280 --> 01:29:17,833
♪ And Christmas is here ♪