Life Story 22/06/2016

Hi all! I was just feeling the need to write about some current stuff in a paste (I missed #PastebinMonday, dangit :( ).
Be warned; long, might be boring.

tl;dr Can't stream, no internet, will be attending SGDQ 2016 (thanks mom, golden), been practising jak offline, gonna set up Month of Final Fantasy XV upon release, not sure what next year has in store school-wise (fuck), took new cosplay pictures, and I'm in love. :)

Recently, I've been thinking a lot about streaming. I've had a few people message me on Twitch asking where I am. I do remember telling everyone that I would be back to streaming around 1-2 months after my break like 3 1/2 months ago. The answer is; the school literally hooked up an internet box into the sharehouse... and we can't even fucking use it. Since the sharehouse is literally right next to the school, I have been living off of shitty, public school Wifi for the past 3 1/2 months. The box is sitting not 3 feet from me and we (myself and the three other international students staying with me) can't use the service. I've asked multiple times about the internet to which I always get, "next month you'll have it for sure," "definitely next month," and the ever-so-popular "the school is working out the contract and security measures with the company, but you'll have internet soon". The last ETA we got was August, which is when I'll (maybe) be gone and graduated from this school all together, so you can thank Japan for my absence from streaming. I definitely didn't think getting a single wireless internet connection in a house in one of the most technologically advanced societies on the face of the Earth could have the equivalent difficulty of frontal lobe brain surgery, but apparently, it does. I apologise deeply to my viewers and to (whoever is left) the subscribers who expected more content. The answer is, I simply cannot provide quality content at this public Wifi speed and I'd really prefer to give you the best viewing experience possible. I don't know when I'll be able to stream again, because fuck their ETA, I'm not listening anymore. So my ETA is: whenever I go live next.

However, on a more positive note: YES~! I will be attending SGDQ 2016 this year! I definitely need to give a shoutout to Bonemom~ who helped with the flight fund most generously. Don't know where I'd be without her, she's an amazing woman and she supports 110%. Love you mom! Also, I'd like to give a big shoutout to my good friend Golden, who is providing me with a place to stay in Minneapolis. Honestly, I wouldn't have been able to afford the trip if it wasn't for that man. Thank you so much good sir~! That being said, I'm definitely looking forward to seeing some old buds and meeting/hanging around with some new people! Really looking forward to it! Also, I get the odd message after every GDQ that says something along the lines of "hey man, wish I woulda said hi to you, was too nervous." Please... I don't wanna get these messages. Come say hi to me for God's sake. Life is too fucking short to be nervous. If you ever have a chance to meet someone you look up to personally, goddamn, why not?! You're going to a GDQ to have fun, play games, go fast, communicate, make connections~ Get rid of that nervousness, get up off your ass, and say hi. I don't bite and (can't speak for everyone) but I'm sure most of the other speedrunners don't bite either. If you're nervous when you say hi, don't worry about it!

I have been practising Jak and Daxter a lot (not everyday like I'd like to, but close enough) and I'm pleased to say my time is looking marathon ready (almost). I actually got the PAL version because I couldn't fit my US Fat PS2 in my luggage, so I've been playing J&D PAL on an LCD TV, which is absolutely as disgusting as it sounds. Not mocking EU in any way, but there's easily a good 0.5 secs worth of lag, that completely destroyed all of my muscle memory... I basically had to learn the entire game all over again, compensating for all of the lag that this new version now provides. However, this version is slightly faster than US (due to you being able to keep a blue eco charge on the zoomer even after collecting power cells), so if I can master it, then I'll just keep using this version. This also raises the question of bringing this LCD TV to SGDQ, it's a very small LCD, so I've thought about taking the tv, ps2, and game with me all together, which would kinda be a nightmare luggage-wise, but it'd make me so damn relieved to have everything there that I'm used to using. Gonna have to make a decision on that soon. So, see you all at SGDQ, and best of luck to all runners! Not looking forward to 24 hours worth of travel, but I'll see you when I see you!

POTENTIAL STREAMING PLANS: If I get an internet connection come September, I'm thinking of setting up a semi-full-time or a "Month of" stream featuring Final Fantasy 15! The game looks *so damn* good, and I honestly can't wait to dive into it. If I have the time and the resources, I will be setting up like an 8 hour a day for a month straight thing (or something similar) of FFXV content for you viewers. Thinking of buying another copy and having a *super secret sub raffle* at the end of the month *sssshhhhh*, so that'll give you some incentive to put up with me for a month lol.

Life stuff: currently facing three different options for next year:
-Stay in current school in Japan and take Japanese studies for another year (maybe only 6 month max now),
-Move to Tokyo and study Japanese there, giving me the opportunity to start a career/cosplay A LOT more, potentially with new people,
-Move back to Canada for one year and finish my Game Dev degree

Basically, I tried signing up for my final year of game dev and my guidance counsellor told me that the program is currently full and I probably won't be able to go back. I'm currently on a wait list and am awaiting news this summer about whether or not finishing the degree is possible. If Canada isn't an option, staying where I currently am (maybe only for 6 months) is also a possibility, and honestly, I wouldn't mind securing my Japanese language knowledge for 6 more months! It's so exciting being able to converse in another language. You amaze yourself sometimes when you talk to native speakers, the feeling is extraordinary! Get out there and learn learn learn people!! And finally, my last option, basically the PLAN A, is to move to Tokyo and take Japanese courses, but at the same time, get a job in video game mo-cap modelling and start my career there! Lost of cosplay events and shops actually dedicated solely to cosplaying are based in Tokyo, so the cos experience will definitely be better x500000. Honestly, cosplay is a hobby that has blossomed into something that's truly important to me now. Find something you like, and love it.

Perfect transition; I actually got some new cosplay photos done yesterday! One of the international students in my sharehouse has a bangin camera, so I offered to pay for his lunch in exchange for a shoot! We went to a BIGBOY restaurant about 15 minutes away and took some new Ignis pictures! It was awesome! I'm getting more and more used to dressing up and going out in public lol. Cosplay is a truly expensive hobby, but it's so worth it when you get those pictures back and you're editing it all. It's an awesome experience, like Halloween all year round lmao. It's amazing seeing cosplay from other people as well, because there are just some people that make you go, "holy shit, you look just like a video game/anime character, that's amazing!" (I really wanna reach that level, but I'm not quite that professional ^^;) Like I said above, it's gone from a hobby to something I really enjoy doing. I lot of people say they love the photos and I appreciate that a lot, but really, I do it because I love it.

Animation motivation has been extremely high lately! I love that~ I've been making my new series for about two months now! I work alone, so I haven't made as much of a speedy progress as I'd like to, but progress is better than none. I'd rather focus on making it look great than just pumping out crap content. I hope you enjoy it when I finally release it ^^ not giving any hints either~ sorry.

Last thing on the list; thought about it long and hard, but I'm actually in love with somebody.
I met this person around 3-4 months ago now, but this was the first girl that I met/talked with/went places with where I didn't have those ever-present male thoughts of straight up having sex with the girl. Like, this is a person, whose personality I love btw, that I just wanted to make happy, and I was even happier just being around her. This wasn't just feelings of a physical connection, this feeling actually affected me deeply on an emotional level, a real emotional connection. This is a feeling I have never experienced before. I truly think this is my type of true love. I suppose true love feels different to everybody, but this feels like what's real to me, somebody my heart truly wants. I don't wanna sound all mushy and gross everyone out or sound like a nut or anything, but it's a new thing I've experienced that I've wanted to tell someone about. A truly wonderful feeling. However, the relationship itself is a little... complicated. Hopefully, in due time, things will fall together. I'm thinking positive~!

Anyway, it's time for bed. Gotta wake up early to show new student workers around the office tomorrow. Thanks for reading my long ass boring life story. You guys are great. Stay positive!

See you at SGDQ~!

With love,
B