Small threats

My name is Major General Toot-Toot Minimus, sprite in service to Sir Harry Dresden, Knight of the Winter Court and Wizard of Chicago, and captain of his personal guard. When the skies darken with smoke and ash, when wails of wrong and woe rend the night, when my lord goes to war with titans and unspeakable horrors from Outside of reality, someone must protect him from threats too small to readily discern.
That is my place: not at my lord’s side, but at his ankles.

Heroic Hearts, Little Things, Page 1


It was only after the buzz of our wings had faded that I heard the villains breach the Castle.
There was a distant, faint, but weirdly piercing hissing sound, a crackling, like bacon on a stove over a fire, and it chewed at the insides of my ears like tiny bugs running around in there. We had only been staying all night in the Castle for two weeks (and my lord said that’s why it was called a fortnight!) but I had heard the enchanted stones of the Castle react in anger to invaders before.
Lacuna’s head snapped around at the same time as mine—as did Mister’s. The big tomcat let out a low, mewling growl, and his gray fur rose.
“We are under attack!” I cried. “The pizza must be guarded!”
Lacuna’s blade whispered as it slithered free of its sheath. “Of course, the pizza must be guarded,” she snapped affectionately. “I am without armor. You must be the vanguard. I will remain here.”
“Aye, my love! Castle Bob!” I thundered.
A blue light that was a whole lot blurrier than when Harry had called it appeared. “Uh, what? Oh, hey, it’s, uh . . . what’s his name. That little guy that kept getting bigger. What’s up, kid?”
“We are under attack!” I cried.
The blue light flickered more brightly for a moment, but then the voice said, “I am sure that’s a bunch of hooey.”
“Hooey!” I said, shocked. I was a Major General and the captain of the Za-Lord’s Guard, after all. “You’re hooey!”
“Kid, the defenses on this place are almost as thick as the island’s. Nothing can get in here without me knowing it. Are you sure you’re not just overly excited? Did you guys get into the Froot Loops again?”
“That was but once only!” I protested. “My lord must be warned!”
“Your lord must not be interrupted,” Bob the Castle replied in a very smug and superior voice that I did not like even the smallest little bit. “He has important Wizard of Chicago stuff going on. Budget meetings.”
I did not know what manner of monster a budget was, or how it might best be dispatched in order to free my lord’s attention, but the hairs on my neck rose and my thumbs prickled until I was almost beside myself—the enemy was nigh.
“The enemy is nigh!” I shouted. “Can you not hear the sound?”
Mister came hurtling across the floor and pounced ferociously upon the blue light.
“Gah!” it said. “I don’t have enough to do running this place, with sprites and cats trying to humiliate me every time I turn around!”
“Useless spirit!” I cursed him, drew my sword, and leapt into the air.

Heroic Hearts, Little Things, Page 6-7


“You did great tonight,” he said. “Bob says the Castle’s defenses were all calibrated to larger threats. He didn’t have them set to see anything as small and sneaky as gremlins. Without you and the Guard, the place might have burned down. People under my protection could have gotten hurt.”
I felt my chest stick out a little more. “It was nothing, my lord. All in a night’s work.” I paused, and said abashedly, “I am sorry about your refrigerator, my lord.”

Heroic Hearts, Little Things, Page 17