GOLDEN TURTLE SHELL- MarkTheo guest-*ing theo senior

<Fish>: WW and HIB are at hibs domicile at the beach. They are enjoying crumb cakes and milk and stuff. WW came over to see the new theo, or to hang out or something. What is known is that its a bright and sunny mid day.

<HabeusKaiju>: Hmmmm
<HabeusKaiju>: Good cake, thank's for making it exist, Marky Mark
<Wrong_Way>: "No problem. Though I'm kinda worried if it belong to anyone..."
<HabeusKaiju>: Eh, it'll be fine, I'm sure
Wrong_Way pours himself another glass of milk

<Fish>: The new dog is scratching wws chair. It looks lika a corgi wearing sunglasses, indoors no less.
<Wrong_Way>: "Yeah. So, this is Theo. Looks like he certainly takes after his namesake eh?"
<HabeusKaiju>: Theo Sr, fine distinction
<HabeusKaiju>: And, why do you say that?
<Wrong_Way>: "The sunglasses. Plus I always took you as a corgi man. Or maybe a pug fellow."

<Fish>: The dog starts scratching at the door
<Wrong_Way>: "Aw, just like Theo Junior."
<Fish>: The doge gets through the door and starts running free
<HabeusKaiju>: NOT LIKE THEO JUNIOR!
<HabeusKaiju>: Get him!
HabeusKaiju gets up quickly, and starts to run after the dog
<Wrong_Way>: "What? Oh great."

<Fish>: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnHmskwqCCQ

Wrong_Way watches HabeusKaiju chase after the dog
<Fish>: The dog is fast, yet fat. And is hard to see through the dust clouds it kicks up by running in the sand.
<Fish>: The dog is outside, and if ww wants a view he will have to go out there too unless they have a window
HabeusKaiju tries to coo for the dog to come back, inbetween gasps of air

<HabeusKaiju>: >windows]
<Wrong_Way>: [buy some windows hab]
<HabeusKaiju>: NEVER!]
<Fish>: you have one in claras room]
<Fish>: cannonically[
<Fish>: anyway]

Wrong_Way stops watching from the window and steps outside
<Wrong_Way>: "Hey Theo, you want me just to teleport the dog back inside?"
<Fish>: To ww, it appears to be an episode of the looney tunes.

<Wrong_Way>: [running. what peasents]

<HabeusKaiju>: I GOT THIS!
HabeusKaiju lunges at the dog
<Wrong_Way>: "Okay!"

<Fish>: Hab falls and hits himself on something metal in the ground. The dog sits riiight infront of him and starts licking his face.
<Fish>: Luckily, habs face broke most of the fall.
<HabeusKaiju>: ....
<HabeusKaiju>: OW!
<Wrong_Way>: "You and the dog okay?"

<Fish>: The dog is safely near him and hab spies the metal object in the ground. It appears to a golden turtle shell.
<HabeusKaiju>: YEAH!
HabeusKaiju rubs at his face, and picks up the dog, and the shell
<Fish>: The doge is safely in his arms
<Fish>: As is the shell

<Wrong_Way>: "Cool. Come on, maybe we can catch a rerun of Dog Detectives on the tv."
HabeusKaiju walks back, muttering about a bruised snout
HabeusKaiju locks the door behind him, as he walks in
<Fish>: As habeuskaiju moves with shell in hand
<HabeusKaiju>: I found something weird on the beach...
<Wrong_Way>: "Like what, a baby?"

<Fish>: The shell begins to glow a faint bronze and there seems to be something written on it but dirt is obscuring it.
Wrong_Way is fiddling with the remote to find the channel
<HabeusKaiju>: Why would there be a baby on the beach?
<Wrong_Way>: "Exactly! Something weird."
<HabeusKaiju>: No, it's a sort of shell
HabeusKaiju tosses it at Wrong_Way
<HabeusKaiju>: Yer the turtle expert, what dya make of it?

<Fish>: The shell glows a faint bronze and there seems to be something written on it but dirt is obscuring it.
Wrong_Way turns just in time to catch it and examines the shell
Wrong_Way whistles
<Wrong_Way>: "Wowee, that was one rich turtle."
<Wrong_Way>: "Oh gross, someone wrote graffiti on this."
<HabeusKaiju>: Grafitti? What's it say?
Wrong_Way rubs at the dirt to clean it off
<Wrong_Way>: "Let's see..."

<Fish>: It says "Do not rub"
<Wrong_Way>: "...Uh, remember Aladdin?"

<Fish>: The shell begins to glow brighter as smoke comes out of the shells openings. Four legs pop out and then a head.
Wrong_Way holds the shell away from him with one hand, covering his mouth from the smoke with the other
<Fish>: The smoke and light subsides

<Fish>: "I AM THE TURTLE OF THE SHELL, MORTAL SPEAK YOUR WISH"
<HabeusKaiju>: ...
<HabeusKaiju>: Mark
<HabeusKaiju>: Is this one of your pranks?
<Wrong_Way>: "Damn Theo, I wish. I'd never come up with a turtle genie."

<Fish>: "SPEAK YOUR WISH, OR BY MAGIC TURTLE GENIE LAW SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES"
Fish coughs, its not easy putting on that voice
<Wrong_Way>: "Dude, what should we wish for?"
<HabeusKaiju>: Let's...be careful
<HabeusKaiju>: I think I remember, genies can be dicks, and do monkey's paws on ya
<HabeusKaiju>: So...
<Fish>: "...youre really going to call me a dick?"
<HabeusKaiju>: Get me a piece of paper, and a pen
<Fish>: "Im right here"

<HabeusKaiju>: no, no, I'm saying, you have the potential to screw us over, so, we have to be smart
<HabeusKaiju>: I am sorry, if I offended you
<Wrong_Way>: "Oh sure. I /don't/ have a pen and a piece of paper."
<Fish>: "Damn straight"

Wrong_Way reality warps some and hands it over to HabeusKaiju
<Wrong_Way>: "So, what are these turtle genie laws we have to obey?"
<Fish>: "If you dont make a wish within twenty minutes you will become a turtle"
<Fish>: "Forever"
<Fish>: "Or maybe it was twenty seconds.....I lost the rule book ages ago"
<Wrong_Way>: "...THEOOOOOO."

<Fish>: "Theres some other stuff, I dunno"
<Fish>: "Just get on with it. Your home smells like meat and cupcakes"
<HabeusKaiju>: Ummm.....
<Wrong_Way>: "Ssshhhh, I was gonna tell him with some Frebreeze."

<HabeusKaiju>: Wait, Mark, you rubbed the lamp....
<HabeusKaiju>: It's your wish!
<HabeusKaiju>: And my house smells fine
<Wrong_Way>: "So? What would I need? I can like, make it rain hamburgers."
<Fish>: "It is done"
<Wrong_Way>: "...Wait what?"

Fish makes it start to rain hamburgers
<HabeusKaiju>: ....
<HabeusKaiju>: Really?
<Fish>: "Now, onto your husbands wish"
Fish turns to hab
<HabeusKaiju>: He didn't even say he wi-waitwhat?
<Wrong_Way>: "Oh god it /is/ raining hamburgers."

<Fish>: It stops for a second
<Fish>: Then continues raining hamburgers. Magic
<Wrong_Way>: "Phew- OH NO!"
<Wrong_Way>: "REVERSE IT THEO! DO SOMETHING!"

<Fish>: "Youre time is running up, make your wish"
<Fish>: Hamburgers throughout the town rain down and break through windshields. A random passerby is hit with a hamburger on his way home from work and says "I bet the muties did this"
<HabeusKaiju>: I WISH IT WASN'T RAINING HAMBURGERS, OR ANY TYPE OF FOOD, OR UNUSUAL ITEMS
<Fish>: "It is done"
<Fish>: The rain subsides

<Wrong_Way>: "Oh thank god."
<Fish>: "There is one wish left"
<Wrong_Way>: "...Is this the part where you ask us to set you free or something?"

Fish turns to the dog
<Fish>: "Speak your wish"
<Wrong_Way>: "OH SHOOT!"
<Fish>: "Speak your wish now or you will all suffer the magic consequences"
HabeusKaiju nudges Wrong_Way
<HabeusKaiju>: Make the dog talk!
<Wrong_Way>: "But what do I make it say?"
<HabeusKaiju>: Anything!
<Fish>: The dog wags its tail and pants
<HabeusKaiju>: I would rather not deal with the consequences of....Arielle...
<Wrong_Way>: "Alright jesus."

<Fish>: The dog barks
<Fish>: "IT IS DONE"
<Wrong_Way>: "..."
<Wrong_Way>: "It was nice knowing you Theo."

<Fish>: The dog disapears
<HabeusKaiju>: ...
<HabeusKaiju>: OH GOD! WHERE DID HE GO?!
Wrong_Way instintively cowers for whatever magic there is

Fish goes back in his shell
<Wrong_Way>: "Wait what?"
HabeusKaiju grabs the shell, and shakes it
<HabeusKaiju>: WHERE DID HE GO?!

<Fish>: "A voice is heard coming from inside the shell "I merely fulfilled his wish"
<Wrong_Way>: "Man, that dog must've hated himself or something."
<Wrong_Way>: "What did you do to it, give it peanut butter?"
<HabeusKaiju>: WHAT WAS HIS WISH?!
<Wrong_Way>: "...Wait a sec."
Wrong_Way unlocks the door and looks outside.

<Fish>: The dog is running around in the sand
<Fish>: "He wished to go outside"
<Wrong_Way>: "Eheheheh."
<HabeusKaiju>: ....
Fish goes back to his magic turtle slumber
<HabeusKaiju>: Oh thank goodness!

HabeusKaiju picks up the shell
<HabeusKaiju>: So...
<HabeusKaiju>: What should we do?
<Wrong_Way>: "...Let's hurl into the bottom of the ocean where it can never be found."

<Fish>: Turtle shells float]
<HabeusKaiju>: Dunno...

<Wrong_Way>: [bottom of the ocean]
<Wrong_Way>: [i'm talking satan deep]
<HabeusKaiju>: Stranges things lurk beneath the tides of the water
<Fish>: ittle just rise up, like satan]
<Fish>: or be crushed]

<Wrong_Way>: "That's true. Maybe just leave it in the freezer and we can find somewhere another time."
<HabeusKaiju>: Yeah...
<HabeusKaiju>: Sounds good to me
HabeusKaiju grabs a paper bag out of his drawer, writes, Do Not Open, on it, and pops it in the freezer
<HabeusKaiju>: Dogtective time?
<Wrong_Way>: "Oh yeah sure. Just remember Theo Senior is outside."

<Fish>: Speaking of dogs, Habs is gone from sight.
<HabeusKaiju>: Hmmm
Wrong_Way fiddles with the channels again
<Wrong_Way>: "He's gone?"
<HabeusKaiju>: Mark, tell me, do I have a fence around my property?
<Wrong_Way>: "Theo, you live on the beach. The ocean is your only fence."
<HabeusKaiju>: Just, make a fence, so it doesn't get out, okay?

<Fish>: you own the entire beach?]
<Wrong_Way>: "Fine, but those old ladies at the zoning board are going to get super pissed."
<Fish>: ^]

<HabeusKaiju>: Bleh, It's just temporary
<HabeusKaiju>: Fix it after he comes in, okay?
<Wrong_Way>: "Yeah, yeah. You /don't/ have a fence."
<Fish>: http://petitecurie.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/corgi-beach-party-dogs-cute_9.jpg

<Fish>: ....you know your on a beach, so he could easily just dig under the fence?]
<Wrong_Way>: [theo get a normal house]
<HabeusKaiju>: never]
<Wrong_Way>: [in suburbia like the rest of canada]

<Fish>: Theo has a fence now
<Fish>: The dog is still gone from sight, but im sure it will be fine
<Wrong_Way>: "Is Theo Senior inside? Seriously where is that Dogtective...."
Wrong_Way keeps his sights on finding that channel

<Fish>: He finds the dogtective channel, but it has been cancelled for breaking news of hamburgers falling from the sky
<Wrong_Way>: "UGGGGHHHH. Just great."
<HabeusKaiju>: Hey...
<HabeusKaiju>: Why didn't we wish for world peace?
<Wrong_Way>: "Because turtle genies, Theo."
<Fish>: ^ you aint gotta explain anything]
<HabeusKaiju>: Right, right
<HabeusKaiju>: Movie then?
<Wrong_Way>: "Yeah sure. Bring Theo Senior back in too or else he might start eating sand instead of food."
<HabeusKaiju>: Can ya just pop him back in?
<Wrong_Way>: "Now you want me to. Alright, Theo Senior /isn't/ here."
Wrong_Way hands HabeusKaiju the remote as he gets up to lock the door again
<Wrong_Way>: "Got anything in mind for a movie?"

<Fish>: Theo senior is now on The kitchen Table.
<Fish>: He is eating the crumb cakes
Wrong_Way lifts the dog off the table
<Wrong_Way>: "Ewwwww."
<Fish>: He also seems to have gained a Tie in his travels.
Wrong_Way sets the dog down
<Fish>: The dog is down

<HabeusKaiju>: Ya wanna watch.....Caddyshack>?
<Wrong_Way>: "Sure. Is it as good as the sequel?"
Wrong_Way sits back down on the sofa.
<HabeusKaiju>: Think so

<Fish>: WW and hab enjoyed a nice night watching movies with dog, and they all lived happily ever after.