Thread 37: Stories 16-30

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>SA
"Poindexter"
'Mane-Iac'
[???]
{???}
~~~

>By the way, Poindexter? I've been meaning to ask, what's all that stuff stuck to Mane-iac?

"Awards."

>...Foooor?

"...."

~~~~~

[AND THIS YEARS CONTEST WINNER IS.... THE LOVELY MARE IN THE MANE-IAC COSTUME!]

'AHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!... Who now?'

[You.]

'But you said Mane-Iac costume.'

[Right?]

'Why not just say Mane-Iac? That's my name.'

[...WOW FOLKS! Even changed her name to fit the character, now that's dedication! Let's have a round of applause!]

{TRICKERY! ROBBERY! THIS IS A FARCE!}

[Miss Cheerilee, I'm sorry, you did better than everyone else, but this mare has just blown us away! Even got her laugh and speech down perfect!]

'AHHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!'

[You'd swear she was the real thing!]

{She is the real thing, that's why this is cheating!}

[Now that's just silly, Mane-Iac is a comic character not based on anyone currently living... that we know about...]

'AHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!'

[So... accurate....]

{GRRRRRRRR!}

~~~~~~

>....

"...uh... Mane-Iac knows how to defeat demons, by the by. I mean, I knew that, issue one hundred and thirteen, but I didn't know she knew she knew that..."

>...

"...yeah..."

'AHAHAHAHAHAHHA!'
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>Sucker Punch
"41"
'Announcer'

WHAM!

>Oof! Nice hit...

"Mother fucking combo breakerrrrr!"

The pony and changeling are in the midst of a simulator-based fighting game, the later taking the form of a minotaur in a red pair of wrestling trunks and a luchador mask, the latter sporting the skin of a brown maned unicorn in a white karate Gi. They circle one another...

>Now see this? This right here I like.

"Yeah, no, I'm having fun! ...kicking your ass, fun kicking your ass."

>Lifebars beg to differ but this is a lot less intimidating than the simulator back home.

The minotaur leaps, attempting a flying body press on the mare who deftly dodges.

"Yeah, yeah, like, the pressure's off-HADOUKEN!"

A ball of energy blasts from the unicorn's horn, deftly blocked by the crossed arms of the minotaur.

"-I mean, like...over there there's a precedent, the fights are until someone kicks the bucket."

>And if you're not really wanting that other person TO kick the bucket-

>"You're scared you'll be labeled a pussy. EXACTLY!"

The two fighters meet in a cross counter.

>You get me, you really do!

"Thanks, you too!"

The two leap back.

>Okay, this time for certain! There's gotta be a winner!

"Yeah! Come and get me!"

The two charge at one another and...freeze in the air.

'TIME UP! DRAW GAME!'

>"NOT AGAIN!"

The two fighters shimmer, reverting to their natural states as pony and changeling.

'CONTINUE!?'

The two look at each other and grin.

>"Hell yeah!"
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>29
"MM"
[Zecora]
~~

>OH, WHAT!? THAT'S LEGAL BUT MINE DISGUISE MAGIC SO GREAT IS NOT!?

"...Technically, yeah. She's not using magic to look like that."

>RACISTS! ALL OF YOU!

"...Yep, technically. Rule says no changeling magic specifically."

>RACISTS!

[Please away from my face will you aim that spit.... but 29? Tell me about it...]
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Coco"

"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-"

>This is the most doggone crazy thing I've ever seen.

"-eeeeeeeeee-"

>Changelings? Alrigh'. Robots? Fine. Dinosaur Changeling? I've already accepted smaller ones, what's a bigger version? But this?

"-eeeeeeeeeeeee!"

The two are sitting tied up in a cauldron in the middle of the castle kitchen, said cauldron is being dance around by stuffed animals, savagely holding aloft serving forks and butter knives, chanting in their language of falsetto squeaks.

"They're adorable!"

>I used to hide my sister's stuffed animals. Faust, is this some kinda karmic revenge?

"I could just eat them up!"

>This day is just one punch in my -earmuffs, Sergeant-

Coco puts her hooves over her ears.

>-dick after another.

Coco removes her hooves.

"At least they keep giving us fresh vegetables."

>I think those are supposed to be ingredients. Thankfully they're too scared of burning to actually try cooking us.

"Well that's a victory, surely."

>A small one, but at this point I think it's all I'm gonna get.

"Do you think the Privates will save us?"

>Uhm...

Lucky Strikes looks at the heavily barricaded dessert pantry.

>I'm gonna go with no there, Sergeant.

"Rats-ohmigosh there's a widdle rat right there! Oh I could just cuddle you into dust, I could!"

>If only, sergeant, if only.
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>SA
“Chrysalis”
~~~

>So, are you going to talk about it?

The Queen in question scoffed, examining herself closer with the wall sized mirror before her. Shiny had claimed he was going into the changing room and 'needed a second opinion from someone good with disguises, wink wink', complete with vocalization of said wink, so this question from him was unsurprising, to say the least.

“Yeah, I could talk a lot about this paintjob. Pfft, didn't even get the eyebrows right, I asked for Mareleficent, not bog monster.”

>You know that's not what I meant.

“I know, but talking about all the sex stuff runs the risk Two is going to run over here and me having to improvise. I love using them, but there are only so many innuendos in the world, Shiny, I'll have to repeat eventually.”

>...

Theatrically, she sighed, before engulfing herself in a wave of fire and 'fixing' her facepaint to be a touch more accurate.

“I handled it.”

>What happened?

“I. Handled. It.”

>Not what I asked.

Scoffing, she flippantly ran a hoof through her hair, another wave of fire taking over and styling it a little better to fit the markings on her face.

“One of my minions was disobedient, I had to correct the matter. This disobedience also put a great many others at risk, and yet again my wise words of warning were neglected because a certain someone put on a cute wittle face and acted adorable. For fucks sake, put on a couple of kibble and all of a sudden everyone forgets your species. I swear, I'm going to start passing around little hats to those back at the ballroom and seeing how long it takes for you ponies to notice.”

>...This is about Arana?

She laughed, a loud, screeching cackle.

“Yes! It is! It turns out, I was right all along, and you all were idiots. Surprise surprise.”

His eyes narrowed slightly, suspicious. At this, her laughter died down, and suddenly found an interest in whatever was outside the window.

“...Don't you trust me?”

>Yes.

In all her years, she had never failed to keep an expression off her face if she was trying to hide it, too skilled to let even a single emotion she wanted to keep contained slip.

Except for this one time, when she felt the corner of her lip curl upwards before she could catch it.

>I trust you know what you're talking about, I'm just not sure you're right.

Twice in one day, she really was going soft. Oh well, the downturn of her lip was barely noticeable.

Not that he missed it of course.

>Now don't give me that, there's a reason behind it, really.

“Course there is. She's disarming, seemingly inept, cute and cuddly and oh so adorable, so surely she can't be like...”

>Like you?

She paused at that, deciding to change her look just a touch more with the facepaint.

“Well, she's obviously not like me. I'm smarter than that, even if you all aren't. And I'm too good to actually reduce myself to acting like her.”

>Pfft, I wish you would act all nice and cuddly.

“Oh, Shiny, I'll act however you want. Want me to put on the schoolgirl skirt? I'll tickle you in all the right ways!”

He sighed tiredly, plopping down on his flank.

>I'm going to regret this, I know I am, but... what did she do?

“Well, it's like this. Do you remember that juggling changeling I have?”

>Hard to forget, I have to hold Two's ears shut every time we walk by when he's performing.

“Yes, well, there was was a bit of a confrontation in the hallway not too long ago between myself and the group, totally non-violent in nature I assure you, and I learned some interesting things. It seems dear Applejack fucked up something royal, and let Arana loose in the park yesterday. Sadly, my poor little changeling was with a guard it seemed... ah shit, did I really not get his name?”

>Actarius.

A questioning eyebrow went up.

>What? I still keep in contact with my old guard. And uh... they uh... they've been saying some things about the guy here recently...

“...”

>...Don't want to know. Let's just say he's never been in the popular crowd and that will change exactly never, looks like.

“Pft, figures... anyway, poor little Jugglejack has never had the strongest of minds, so when this Actarius stumbled across Arana wandering about, he just had to take her in and watch her on behalf of his princess...”

An almost inaudible, imperceptible growl bubbled in her throat.

“...and when I found the little twit, he was stuffed full of some pheromones I don't recognize. I may not know what they do, but really, do I have to? They're from the one born of Sciderella, enough said. Played him like a fiddle, just like the rest of you...”

>Ah. That... that is quite disturbing, I agree. Is that all?

Now the flinch, that she could keep off her face. Totally neutral.

“Ah, no. It seems Applejack jumped to unfortunate conclusions when I retrieved him due to the fact I had no time to explain the matter to her... and to be frank, I had no need to.”

>Yes you did.

She froze, a slightly harsh glint in her eye as she looked to the stallion.

>Just saying, Applejack deserves to know if-

“If what, one of them is to die by a Queen? Like, say... 13? Do you think it would bother her if 13 died?”

Her lip curled, exposing a fang to him.

“I don't think it would. She didn't seem too bothered back when Chitania struck, I doubt she would be upset for someone who has barely, if ever, spoken to her.”

>You know that's not tru-

“Don't give me that!”

Another wave of fire overtook her, messing up her facepaint a bit more, and leaving her with a more neutral expression.

“She doesn't give a damn about them, just whether or not she can control them over me! Do you really think something like Jugglejack's safety was enough to set her off to attack me? HAH!”

Stunned, Shining Armor reeled back.

>She... actually attacked you?

“Went right at me in front of everyone, took your sister and Celestia to hold her back. All because she commanded me to stay put, and I ignored her. I exerted my authority over my hive, and gave her no say in his fate. Which she deserves none. She granted them a place to stay, and for that I have made concessions to accommodate her, but this matter is from Queen to subject, not her! Such a lack of power could not stand with her, and she could not contain her rage...”

A smirk crossed her face, and her gentle hoof brushed some of his mane from in front of his eyes.

“Not to worry, I hold no grudge on the matter. I am simply going to forgive, move on, and-'

>Have you ever actually talked to her?

She froze, too surprised from his deadpanned expression to continue.

“...Her who?”

>Applejack. Have you ever actually, like, talked to her?

She tilted her head in abject confusion, utterly baffled.

“We've spoke hundreds of times-”

>No! I mean, have you actually talked to her! Like, I don't know, spoken about her family?

“She has the little one with the red mane, right? That's her sister?”

>And?

“...OH! She also has a grandmother, and... that red guy is her brother?”

>...

“...What, is he not?”

>I ju- ugh...

He mashed a hoof to his face, smearing his own paint.

>You know she worked at Sweet Apple Acres, right?

“YES! I've been there! She threatened me because I haggled her grandmother, remember?”

>Well, what else do you know?

“...She has an accent because working on a farm gives you one?... somehow... despite nobody in her town having one...”

>Have you actually had any sort of extended conversation with her not pertaining to work, or the changelings, or some prank you pulled!?

She took on a wide, blank stare.

“...She uh... she likes hats?”

>...

“She likes apples!”

>...List of weaknesses for her, go.

“She's stubborn to the point of problematic. Her magic is unfocused and immature. She is terrible at flying. She is always wearing that hat which prevents her from seeing directly above her with a glance. She is very attached to her sister, the Element's of Harmony and Spike. She is easily enraged if someone swindles her grandmother. She speaks bluntly sometimes to the point of abrasive. She is dedicated to her work but becomes unfocused with time. She is very controlling and wants things to go her way. She thinks things through most days but snap decisions are not her strong suit. She has a huge ass, but it's not as big as mine.”

>...

“...That last one wasn't a weakness, just seeing if you were paying attention.”

>...

Very, very calmly, he reached up, and grabbed both sides of her face. So surprised at the contact, she did nothing as he brought her closer to his face.

>Chrysalis? I'm not going to say another word on this matter, because I know you are not dumb. You are actually very smart, even if you do not make it obvious all the time. You will put this together very quickly, I'm certain. In the meantime, however, I want to bring up a scenario to you. You said in the past, Arana's hive did really, really horrible things, right?

Slowly, she nodded.

>And you've just discovered that she did something that could point to her being super dangerous, yes? Something that means her just being around you could be deadly?

Again, a nod.

>So you want her gone and never want to see her again?

One last nod.

He leaned his face just a bit forward, until he could see right into her wide, curious eyes.

>That is exactly what they were saying to me when you took the Heart, and used it. Considering your history with me, in so many ways... My council told me to get rid of you, Celestia said she'd understand if I wanted you sent off, even Twilight and Applejack were terrified of you being home all the time. They said maybe just to send you away for a bit at the very least... I said no. I told them you were staying. And now here we are, sitting in an amusement park, looking ridiculous with really bad facepaint jobs... and we'd both be there for the other if something happened. Call me an idiot if you want, call me easily fooled, or naive or what have you, but I don't regret it.

Her eyes were the first to break away, and cast downward.

“You're not an idiot. You're just... Shiny. It's how you are.”

She suddenly froze as he jerked her forward, forelegs tightening around her neck for just a moment.

>And yet, I still didn't give you a chance until Celestia made me. So maybe...

He let go, too soon for the Changeling's tastes, and gave her one last smile.

>Come on, 18's probably making all sorts of innuendo and frying poor 42's brain while Two just sits there confused. Can't keep the family waiting.

He turned, heading to the exit out of the changing room, only to stop just at the door, and look back curiously.

>You coming?

She turned her back on him, looking at herself in the giant mirror before her once more.

“Nah, need to work on my look a bit. Go on ahead, but don't try to leave me behind again, I'm not going on another search for your white ass.”

He rolled his eyes, but smiled as he left the changing room.

Alone, she began cycling through various patterns and shapes for her face, all kinds of looks going up every time.

“Hrm...”

None of them seemed quite right, but she felt she would land on the right one eventually.

Just needed a bit more work....
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>High Roller
"32"
'Reggie'

>Okay. Seriously. What?

"Hm?"

>You don't notice anything screwy going on here.

"Nope."

>Ok, let's ignore how the pizza is now on the floor, the boxes are now in your cell and the pieces of the pizza have arranged themselves somehow into the letter F-U-K and U again.

"Weird."

>...are you fucking with me?

"I didn't move."

>If you didn't move, then who did? The roaches? The roaches that are now EVERYWHERE thanks to you?

"Yes."

>Ugh...these vermin a serious drag, man. Do you WANT me to get in trouble with Sucker Punch?

"I had nothing to do with this. It was Reggie."

>Reggie?

'*chitter*'

>...you have a roach on your head.

"Yep...that's Reggie."

'*chitter*'

>You were not this freaky on day one.

"I was drunk."

>Yeah well we aren't doing that again, so knock all this off, bug master!

"I say again, I hold no control over them...huh..."

>Huh what?

"They're using the boxes...well, that's strange."

>...are they...?

"Constructing walls from pizza boxes to press against my prison's bars? I believe so."

>...Reggie?

'*chitter*?'

>Make them stop.

'*HISSSSS!*'

"...I think that means no."

>Of all the...the hell is that?

"Hell is what?"

>Am I the only one that hears squeaking?

"No, I hear it, I just assumed my friends procured a squeaky toy as well."

>...this day just gets weirder and weirder.

'Tell me about it.'

>"..."

'...*chitter*'
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>Guard
"Guard 2"
'Guard 3'
~~~~~

Stationed off in the far, faaaaar corner of the castle was one of the most boring things that anyone at any time could ever do.

So, naturally, they went right to playing cards.

>Go fish.

Boring cards.

"...So, uh, is anyone creeped out by that little changeling who keeps grabbing the princesses ass-"

'YES.'

>Why is that creepy? Guy's in grade school. My cousin goes to the same class as he does. You can't blame a kid for finally getting that funny feeling.

"Didn't you say your cousin also goes to class with that one filly from the A-team?"

>He does.

"Starting to call bullshit."

>No, totally. She goes to his class.

"Buuuullllshit."

'She knows more about chemistry than I do. She's totally too mature for that.'

>...
"..."

'...What?'

>Dude, super creepy.

"You sounded like you want to date her or something."

'WHOA! NO WAY! Don't lump me in with the degenerates!'

>Speaking of, where's Last Act?

'The guy went to an amusement park for the weekend or something.'

>Good. Get some time off from that guy. So fucking annoying.

'...he took the bug monster with him.'

>"EWWWWWWWWW!"

'Right?'

>Look, I'm tolerating those guys, really, no more wishing them dead I promise, but BLEEEEH!

"Gonna get eggs laid in him or something."

'Least Glimmer would have a pregnant buddy.'

>...Do you think we can knock up them too, or is it a one way street?

"Wouldn't know, got a plate to the head on that date and ended up with six stitches."

>"'...'"

'Kind of sucks he's probably getting more laid than we are.'

"I KNOW!"

>Want to spread a whole bunch of rumors about him?

'It's Last Act, what more could we possibly say?'

>...Damn, right, kind of worn out...

'...Got any sixes?'

"Go fish."

>You know, at some point, one of us is actually going to have to admit we're lying.

"'...'"

>...Eventually...
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>18
"42"
'Cadence'
[2]
~~~~

>This is so humiliating.

"You? I have to deal with my look being-TOUCH YOUR PAINT TO MY HELMET, AND DIEEEEE!"

>...

'42, you have a problem.'

"This helmet is a symbol of my rank, to have it in any way touched by carnival paint is every bit a stain on my record as it is a stain on the object in question."

>Oh yeah, don't want anyone to think our military is anything but awesome.

"We don't, actually. Last thing we need is someone 'wiping out the changeling menace'."

>Oh please, 12 says he hasn't been set on fire in over a month now.

"..."

>...wow, sounded so much more dismissive in my head.

'It's not that bad. Nobody harasses 10, I don't think.'

"Haven't heard of any, no."

>Well, that robot of hers does keep shooting ponies...

"What is that thing running on anyway?"

'Magic?'

"So then, how's she keeping it charged?"

'...huh...'

>Meh, unimportant.

"..."

'You keep glancing at me. Is my paintjob that bad?'

"NO!"

'...'

"I mean, ah, no. It is simply an interesting pattern."

>It's just a heart.

"I like hearts."

'...'

"...BECAUSE CHANGELING OBVIOUSLY! Makes me, uh, makes me think of food. Which is good. Need food to live... yummy love... good..."

'Oh, right, that makes sense.'

>...You did tell them not to do anything too drastic with Two's facepaint, right?

'No? How do you go too far with face pain-'

[CADDY EIGHTEEEN FERTY TWO LOOK! I'MMA KITTY! NYAAA~!]

>..
"..."
'...'

>""HNNNNNNNGGGGGGGH!"'

*THUMPTHUMPTHUMP~*

[IT KEEPS HAPPENIN"!]
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{SA
~Chrysalis~
~~~~

{OH COME ON!}

~Every five minutes, I swear.~

[Nyaaa~?]

{HNNNGGG-}

*SMACK!*

{...}

~....Stop it...~

{...}

~...Stop.~
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>Changeling
"???"
~~~~

Changeling number... something or other was in a very rare spot, for him at least. Normally, he was very boring background noise. Maybe a quip or two, but most often silent. But, at last, he had broken out and done something! Took charge, grabbed the reigns of his life! And now...

>Thissssh issh the beeeesshhhhh!

He was drunk right off his ass.

>Wha-why dunna... why dunna we doo shish more offen? Thish ish jush... ish da beeeeeeeshhhhhh!

As such, he was cheerfully oblivious to anything at all as he stumbled through the hallway. Yep, an elephant could have run right by, and he would be so unbothered he would likely end up stepping on said elephant's foot.

"SMASH!"

Such, it wasn't surprising when he stepped on a tiny doll of some kind.

Foggy, unfocused eyes squinted at the thing making tiny cracking noises right in front of him as it stomped it's plastic hooves together.

>...Hey...

The doll stared at him, wide unblinking plastic eyes staring right into his.

>...Fuck you-ACK!

With way, way, way more power than she should have been capable of, her hooves hooked around his neck, and lifted them both into the air.

"ZZZZto the CastleZzZ GONNA SMASH IT!"

Through sheer force of will, she controlled her voicebox. Then through sheer force of... well, force, she controlled his head.

Right into the ground.

Content, she stomped off, uncaring anymore to the one who had insulted her.

Poor little Changeling number something or other... sometime, he would wake up with a headache that killed, a spine that felt out of alignment, and a need to spew so much goo he could paint the walls of the entire castle. But now was not that time.

Now was a time for one thing. His face to the floor, and dreaming of a time when the pain would stop.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Pinkie
"Dash"
'Fluttershy'
[??]
{??}
~~~~

>Now where'd she go!?

"Seriously. Every single time with this."

'Do you think she's avoiding m-... I mean, avoiding us? She wouldn't have any reason to do that, right? She'd at least send us a note if we were doing something that would make her not want to be in the immediate vicinity for some dangerous, possibly life threatening reason, right?'

>...Probably?

'Well, that's a relief.'

[Does she always ramble like that?]

>MARBLE! LIMESTONE!

"Your parents seriously could pick names to save their lives."

{Hey sis.}

>YOU CAME!

[Promised we would, didn't we?]

{Nice to see this place is full up.}

>Yeah, business is great! Doing fantastic and the party's going on for all of time!

{Yep, dad's proud of you for pulling this off.}

[Says you really earned the trust he gave you before he loaned you the money.]

>Awww...

[...Still hates that one partner of yours, though.]

>He does not hate Cheesy!

{Does. So does mom.}

>NU UH!

[…]

>...Dang.

[Sorry.]

{They love that other guy, though.}

>HE'S MARRIED!

{So?}

>UGGHHHHHH!

[Pffthahhaha...]

>YOU ARE DOING THIS TO MAKE ME MAD!

{And?}

>WORKING!

{Simple things in life.}

[Yep.]

“...So glad I'm an only child.”

'Me too... though I kind of wish I had a cool big brother.'

“...”

'...Because reasons....'

>RAAAGHHHHH!
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Twilight
"Celestia"
~~~~~

The trio of dragon, alicorn and other, more numb looking alicorn were keeping a steady pace ahead of them, occasionally one on either side of the orange mare would give her some kind of encouraging words, or just general statements about certain someones who are... uh... words that would make Shiny go into a rampage if someone said them to Two.

But behind them, two more learned based minds were focused on other things. Floating, evil looking things.

>You know, I'm pretty sure there was a way to make this not look like a floating orb of evil.

“Right?”

>I'm just saying that it looks like I'm carrying around someone's soul or something.

“Definitely dark looking.”

>The red color is worse.

“Like a giant bubble of blood.”

>...so creepy...

“So what do you think they could be?'

>Well, preliminary scans showed no sign of tissue from the heart, so it's not harmful in the dissolving sense. No Cerebrospinal fluid, so it's not going up into his cranium, meaning mind control is out.... It's not even detecting any magic, so it's not a transfer system for her love magic... what is this stuff?

“Well, I'm sure you'll figure it out.”

>I'd better, or else Chrysalis is going to go on a rampage.

“...Do you really think she will?”

Celestia's tone was serious, no longer curious or jovial.

>What? No, oh no. She'll... she wouldn't when there was so much on the line. Maybe if Arana tried to get into her ballroom, but to just go at her? No, not so long as Shiny tells her no.

“Hmmm... I'm not so sure.”

>Celestia... come on, you've got to know her by now. She wouldn't...

“Perhaps...”

Twilight froze, wide, worried eyes looking up at her teacher.

“...but certainly not unless something set her off, I agree. She loves her place in the Empire, even if she doesn't say it, and is happy her hive is kept safe. She would not jeopardize her place... not yet.”

>Yet?

Celestia's eyes only flickered towards her, just for a moment.

“It is hard to let a dream go, Twilight. Sometimes, fulfilling that dream is the only thing that keeps someone going, long after the time for sanity and reason has come and gone. I know this. I have seen it a hundred times before. She would not risk the ones she cares for, I am mostly sure of that, but perhaps... she might not need to, in order to make her dream realized. Or at least, this might be what she has come to believe.”

Confusion, fear, curiosity, all were apparent in Twilight's mind.

“She said she was to keep you from making a mistake and causing more destruction, yes? Because deep down, she knows the benefits you bring, and perhaps the new world you can help make?”

Uncertainty in her eyes, she nonetheless nodded.

“...See that you do the same for her.”

She went silent after that, nothing else to be said on the matter.

Lost in her thoughts, Twilight could only stare into the crimson, turbid cloud before her, and wonder.

Wonder at how frightening and foreboding this evil thing looked...

And yet, at the same time wonder what it was hidden within...
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Poindexter
"Mane-Iac"
'Chrysalis'
~~~~~

>...Huh..

"AHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHA! MY LOOOOOK HAS BEEN TRANSFORMED! I AM MANE-IAC NO LONGER! NOW... I AM PUPPIAC! AHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"

>Yep... total puppy look.

'HAH! Told you, Maney, should've gone for the dark shadowy look.'

"AHAHAHAH! BUT SCETETORRRRIA, MY LOOK IS... I mean, I like puppies! They're adorable!... Until they start eating my hair."

'Yeah, that happens. Very chewy.'

"I think they think it's licorice or something."

>Do they make green licorice?

'They do, I've had some.'

"How waaaas it?"

'Tasted like I ate seaweed off the floor.'

"...That sounds terrible!"

'Because it was.'

"Oh... AHAHHAHAH! THEN I WAS CORREEEEECT!"

'That you were.'

"AHAHAHAHAH! VICTORYYYYYYY!"

>Congratulations.

'Shut up you tailkisser.'

>...Tail kisser?

'You know what I mean.'

>...OHHH! No, yeah, I get it.

"I don't..."

>Tails are made of hair, and hair as we've established looks like green licorice, which tastes bad, so tail kisser means tasting something bad.

"Oh...BRILLLLIANT! I SEE IT NOW, POINDEXTER! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"

'Smooth.'

>Worked, didn't it?

'...Point.'

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHH!"

'...Still don't like you."

>...I know...

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>Celestia
"Vekir"

"Princess of White, of the City of White, Controller of the Hated Sky Demon-"

>Please don't list all of my weird titles.

"Ok, I possess the inquirations!"

>Oh no, not you too!

"Whyfor is it that the Giver of Chances and the Mother of Zhetri Tuuhl-"

>Snrk! Oh...oh wow.

"What is the funny thing?"

>Don't worry yourself about it...really don't.

"A second ok! But whyfor is it that they quarrel?"

>I'm not sure you'd really understand, erm, have we been introduced?

"I am Morlock!"

>I gathered, yes. But what is your name?

"I am Vekir, sister of Rekulk, bringer of trades!"

>Ahh, well it's nice to meet you, little one.

"Aha! You are understanding!"

>Excuse me?

"Vekir is not the child! Vekir is small, little, short! You understand much, Tall White Princess!"

>Celestia, Princess Celestia if you insist on the title.

"Seeeeeelesia, Vekir will remember."

>Stumbled a bit on the dismount with my name, but we'll work on it. As for your question, it's quite...complicated on both ends, and those ends are entirely certain the other end is incorrect while they are in the right.

"Aha! Like the tunnel skulkers!"

>...no, please, go on, I'm listening.

"Tunnel skulkers are creatures beneath the mountain, small, small as pups. They skulk in tunnels, because that is what they do, they travel in packs and eat up dead things and less-dead things! Many times they and the Morlocks fought over the things that were dead and not-so-dead!"

>Yes, go on?

"But ahaha, then the Head of Metal taught the Morlocks marriage!"

>...

"Yes, we Morlocks took the tunnel skulkers and slowly made them see that with the Morlocks, the skulkers can find even more less-dead things and then eat them with the Morlocks so that they can die less! Alone, the Morlocks and skulkers were not as good as they were together!"

>Husbandry.

"What's it?"

>You said marriage, but you meant husbandry.

"Vekir does not want to take a mate YET, Seelesia Princess."

>...You're quite dense, aren't you, Vekir?

"No, I am quite light, that is why my brother can carry me by the neck scruffings."

>In either case, your story, morbid as it is, has some merit. Now if only there was a 'Less-Dead' thing for them to come together over.

"...may I poke the swirly red blood ball?"

>I'm afraid not.

"Curses."
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

>SA
"Chrysalis"
'Cadence'
[18]
{42}
~2~
(PD)
=Mane-iac=
~~~~~

"Really? We're doing this here?"

>Yes. We are doing this here. We may be in the middle of an amusement park, but you know what? This is only spurring me forward. This is only driving me to be more determined about the matter. All of us are going to sit here at this table, and we are going to eat NORMALLY.

"...You poor, deluded fool."

'Isn't it a little late for lunch?'

{Still feels too early for dinner, though.}

~But it's just the right time for Marchmalleys!~

>Did anyone here have breakfast or lunch?.... No? Well-

[Several of us feed off love, a non-physical thing, so you realize the concept of stopping to eat in intervals is still something that we find silly as a species, right? You don't love more at noon than you do at night.]

"..."

[Wow, nothing?]

=I don't get it....=

(Nothing to get because she didn't respond.)

=Oh...NOW I UNDERSTAND! AHAHAHAHAHAHAH!=

[Oh, right... riiiight...]

"Why is he at the table?"

>Because it's... linner? What even is the term for this?

'I like Dunch.'

[Dunch sounds painful.]

{But linner sound like a laundry detergent.}

"Neither really works as well for brunch."

'Maybe go with afternoon brunch?'

(But then they'll just think you're talking about a brunch closer to lunch than breakfast.)

"What? That's stupid, if it's in the afternoon it's lunch or later. By sheer definition if it reaches afternoon it's no longer breakfast or lunch."

(Just saying how ponies will regard it.)

"Stupid ponies."

>No using stupid at the table.

"We are sitting on a giant spiral smiley face table, and I'm not allowed to use the word stupid? ENTRAPMENT!"

~...I don't like the smiley face...~

'Me either.'

[Ditto.]

{I just wish to start punching, and not stop until it is dead.}

(Pretty sure I once used a prop like this in those horror movies you made...)

>It was the only table big enough! There's eight of us, and two of 'us' are oversized.

=AHAHAHAHAH! MY HAAAIR IS... kind of puffy, yeah, sorry...=

"We could knock that down to seven if-"

>No.

=Plplplplp.=

~Hee!~

'Don't give her ideas.'

"Caddy, if she hasn't learned from me by now, she'd have a disorder of some kind."

~When are the marchmalleys getting here?~

>Right? We've been sitting here for a half hour. Still, it'll be here just as soon as...

"...You didn't order yet, did you?"

>...

"Used to the whole 'I have chefs who do this for me' thing, aren't you?"

>...Huuhhh...

~...HAH!~

Altogether, the table froze, and stared at the tiniest changeling.

~...What?~

There were no words spoken by any of them. Only dread.

Dread that seeped deep... deep into their hearts...

"...She clearly learned that from Celestia..."
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________