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- “Attention again!" The Grand High Witch was shouting. "I vill now give to you the rrrecipe for concocting Formula 86 Delayed”
- Handbags were opened all over the room and notebooks were fished out.
- "Give us the recipe, O Brainy One!" cried the audience impatiently. "Tell us the secret."
- "First," said The Grand High Witch, "I had to find something that vould cause the children to become very small very qvickly."
- "And what was that?" cried the audience.
- "That part vos simple," said The Grand High Witch. "All you have to do if you are vishing to make a child very small is to look at him through the wrrrong end of a telescope."
- "She's a wonder!" cried the audience. "Who else would have thought of a thing like that?"
- "So you take the wrrrong end of a telescope," continued The”
- “Action Mouse-Maker! Get out pencils and paper."
- Handbags were opened all over the room and notebooks were fished out.
- "Give us the recipe, O Brainy One!" cried the audience impatiently. "Tell us the secret."
- "First," said The Grand High Witch, "I had to find something that vould cause the children to become very small very qvickly."
- "And what was that?" cried the audience.
- "That part vos simple," said The Grand High Witch. "All you have to do if you are vishing to make a child very small is to look at him through the wrrrong end of a telescope."
- "She's a wonder!" cried the audience. "Who else would have thought of a thing like that?"
- "So you take the wrrrong end of a telescope," continued The“Grand High Witch, "and you boil it until it gets soft."
- "How long does that take?" they asked her.
- "Tventy-vun hours of boiling," answered The Grand High Witch. "And vhile this is going on, you take exactly forty-five brrrown mice and you chop off their tails vith a carving-knife and you fry the tails in hair-oil until they are nice and crrrisp."
- "What do we do with all those mice who have had their tails chopped off?" asked the audience.
- "You simmer them in frog-juice for vun hour," came the answer. "But listen to me. So far I have only given you the easy part of the rrrecipe. The rrreally difficult problem is to put in something that vill have a genuine delayed action rrree-sult, something that can be eaten by children on a certain day but vhich vill not start vurrrking on them until nine o'clock the next morning vhen they arrive at school“school."
- "What did you come up with, O Brainy One?" they called out. "Tell us the great secret!"
- "The secret", announced The Grand High Witch triumphantly, "is an alarm-clock!"
- "An alarm-clock!" they cried. "It's a stroke of genius!"
- "Of course it is," said The Grand High Witch. "You can set a tventy-four-hour alarm-clock today and at exactly nine o'clock tomorrow it vill go off."
- "But we will need five million alarm-clocks!" cried the audience. "We will need one for each child!"
- "Idiots!" shouted The Grand High Witch. "If you are vonting a steak, you do not cook the whole cow! It is the same vith alarm-clocks. Vun clock vill make enough for a thousand children. Here is vhat you do. You set your alarm-clock to go off at nine o'clock tomorrow morning. Then you rrroast it in the oven until it is”
- “crrrisp and tender. Are you wrrriting this down?"
- "We are, Your Grandness, we are!" they cried.
- "Next," said The Grand High Witch, "you take your boiled telescope and your frrried mouse-tails and your cooked mice and your rrroasted alarm clock and all together you put them into the mixer. Then you mix them at full speed. This vill give you a nice thick paste. Vhile the mixer is still mixing you must add to it the yolk of vun grrruntle's egg."
- "A gruntle's egg!" cried the audience. "We shall do that!"
- Underneath all the clamour that was going on I heard one witch in the back row saying to her neighbour, "I'm getting a bit old to go bird's nesting. Those ruddy gruntles always nest very high up."
- "So you mix in the egg," The Grand High Witch went on, "and vun after the other you also mix in the following items: the claw of a crrrabcrrruncher, the beak of a blabbersnitch, the snout of a grrrobblesqvirt and the tongue of a catsprrringer. I trust you are not having any trrrouble finding those.
- "None at all!" they cried out. "We will spear the blabbersnitch and trap the crabcruncher and shoot the grobblesquirt and catch the catspringer in his burrow!"
- "Excellent!" said The Grand High Witch. "Vhen you have mixed everything together in the mixer, you vill have a most marvellous-looking grrreen liqvid. Put vun drop, just vun titchy droplet of this liqvid into a chocolate or a sveet, and at nine o'clock the next morning the child who ate it vill turn into a mouse in tventy-six seconds!”
- Chapter 9: The Recipe
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