ZeroShot

[22:41]	<UNOwen>	...
[22:41]	<UNOwen>	In a world where the likes of the serious wage war against the likes of the absurd, UNOwen clutters up the IC channel with meaningless tripe that is not relevant to anyone�s interests. OR IS IT?! Goaded by a mysterious voice that probably came from the OOC channel right over there, this sad excuse for a man drags this world into a game with no plot, no continuity, and no future.
[22:41]	<UNOwen>	This is�ZERO-SHOT! The Maids game that is so worthless it�s not even pretending that it�s any good.
[22:42]	<UNOwen>	Heaven or Hell, let's rock, etc.
[22:42]	<UNOwen>	...
[22:42]	* UNOwen	sits at his computer, starting at the screen senselessly.
[22:43]	<Orange>	What ya playin mister Owen?
[22:43]	* Orange	peers over his shoulder.
[22:43]	* UNOwen	turns to the newcomer standing next to him.
[22:43]	<UNOwen>	"Gah! You! You lying fruit, Maryn! How did you get here?!"
[22:43]	<Orange>	Why are you calling me Maryn?
[22:43]	* UNOwen	is very scared and confused. The internet come to life?!
[22:44]	* UNOwen	decides that that would be a lame thing to do, and stops acting like that.
[22:44]	<UNOwen>	"I just thought that was you name, I suppose."
[22:44]	* UNOwen	shurgs.
[22:44]	* UNOwen	also shrugs.
[22:45]	<UNOwen>	"I'm bad with names. Very bad."
[22:45]	<UNOwen>	"But anyways, playing...I don't know if you'd call this playing, really..."
[22:45]	<Orange>	Well just don't get it wrong next time or I might have to devour your guts from inside out ok~?
[22:46]	* UNOwen	flatfaces at the newcomer.
[22:46]	<UNOwen>	"I foresee certain complications with that plan."
[22:47]	<Orange>	Like how I'm going to feed you something nice and then when you go to sleep I stuff a cloth dripping with Cloroform and then working from there?
[22:47]	* UNOwen	nods.
[22:47]	<UNOwen>	"That might work, actually."
[22:48]	<UNOwen>	"What IS your name, then?"
[22:48]	<Orange>	Orange sir.
[22:48]	<UNOwen>	"Orange, mhm. I'll forget in an hour, but I'll try not to."
[22:49]	<Orange>	I guess you're going to die in an hour then.
[22:49]	<Orange>	Ah well.
[22:50]	<UNOwen>	"And, actually...gah, well, might as well get this out of the way before it gets awkward, but are you a guy or a girl? It's a little hard to tell. No offense."
[22:50]	<Orange>	I'm just a really feminine guy.
[22:50]	* UNOwen	's face is probably looking weird right now or something. Whatever.
[22:50]	<UNOwen>	"Well, at least we got that out of the way."
[22:51]	* UNOwen	looks at his computer screen again.
[22:51]	<UNOwen>	"Hmm...not a lot of action going on tonight..."
[22:51]	<Orange>	I blame the other people.
[22:51]	<UNOwen>	"You do that often?"
[22:51]	<Orange>	Do what often?
[22:52]	<UNOwen>	"Blame other people."
[22:52]	<Orange>	Of course!
[22:52]	* UNOwen	pulls up a folding chair next to the computer.
[22:53]	<UNOwen>	"Sit down if you want, I guess. There's plenty of room."
[22:53]	<UNOwen>	"You want anything to eat? I've got lots of snacks."
[22:53]	<UNOwen>	"Oh, wait, hang on a sec..."
[22:53]	<Orange>	hm?
[22:54]	* UNOwen	switches to the other Chatzilla tab.
[22:54]	* UNOwen	returns to the IC tab.
[22:54]	<UNOwen>	"Just trying to get more people in here."
[22:55]	<UNOwen>	"I doubt it will work. I'm not very charismatic."
[22:55]	<Orange>	That's because you're too serious.
[22:55]	* UNOwen	shrungs.
[22:56]	* UNOwen	also corrects his misspellings.
[22:56]	* UNOwen	goes *shrugs
[22:56]	<UNOwen>	"Meh."
[22:56]	<Orange>	Horriblr typos tonight. You're worse off than the Doc.
[22:56]	<Orange>	Oh.. damn it.
[22:56]	<UNOwen>	"IRC brings out the worst in my literary abilities."
[22:57]	<UNOwen>	"Eh? What now?"
[22:57]	* UNOwen	opens up a Snickers he was given early for Halloween.
[22:57]	<Orange>	nothing in particular, just feeling like I'm rooted to the ground or something.
[22:57]	<UNOwen>	"You want to move somewhere else just in case?"
[22:58]	<Orange>	I think this is fine until the others have something to say~
[22:59]	* UNOwen	checks the activity in the OOC tab again.
[22:59]	<UNOwen>	"I don't think they're going to. Looks like it's just us."
[22:59]	<Orange>	Damn it.
[22:59]	<UNOwen>	"I don't blame them, though. This world is a dead end."
[23:00]	* UNOwen	motions to the vague fabric of time-space on the edges of the two men's vision.
[23:00]	<UNOwen>	"No thought went into it. It's just a placeholder world."
[23:01]	* UNOwen	goes :| in the other channel, because that's what he does.
[23:01]	* Orange	shrugs.
[23:01]	<UNOwen>	"Hey, you spelled it right. Nice job."
[23:02]	* UNOwen	looks around for something to do.
[23:02]	<Orange>	Of course, I'm not you.
[23:02]	<Orange>	Well at least you can play unlike that Dune guy/.
[23:03]	<UNOwen>	Eh, Dune's a cool guy, he fights slackers and is probably afraid of many normal things.
[23:04]	* UNOwen	refuses to spell that meme correctly.
[23:04]	<UNOwen>	"This is getting pretty boring. I'm going to use meta-gaming to bring in something exciting, okay?"
[23:04]	<Orange>	Sure why not? We're already meta-gaming as it is.
[23:05]	* UNOwen	moves his wooden sword from on top of the dresser to within the realm of absurdity.
[23:05]	<UNOwen>	"Is this exciting?"
[23:06]	<Orange>	hm.. kinda.
[23:06]	<huh>	         Because there doesn't seem to be a point.
[23:06]	<Orange>	Only if you can throw it through your monitori into mine.
[23:07]	* UNOwen	looks around for a mysterious voice.
[23:07]	<UNOwen>	"Wait, did you hear that?"
[23:07]	<Orange>	No.
[23:07]	<UNOwen>	"Huh."
[23:07]	* UNOwen	is quite aware of the lame joke actually.
[23:07]	<Orange>	If I was religious I'd buy into that but alas I'm not.
[23:08]	<UNOwen>	"Nah, it's probably just the fuzzy grey wall of continuity here. We're good."
[23:08]	* CHOAM	can be seen sitting in silence on the other side of the room, conquering Europe in World War 2 with a laptop made out of wishful thinking.
[23:09]	* UNOwen	half-expected him to be there in real life!
[23:09]	<UNOwen>	"Ahh, we got another one.
[23:09]	<UNOwen>	"
[23:09]	<Orange>	About fucking time. CHOAM, get your sorry sandy ass over here.
[23:09]	<UNOwen>	"Aren't you supposed to be working, though?"
[23:10]	<huh>	Yes, work.
[23:10]	* huh	drags Dune away.
[23:10]	* UNOwen	hears that voice again.
[23:10]	* CHOAM	frow-
[23:10]	* CHOAM	is promptly dragged out of this reality.
[23:10]	* UNOwen	sees people appear and vanish with no regard to anything!
[23:10]	<Orange>	God damn it, stop tricking me with your religious propaganda Owen!
[23:10]	<UNOwen>	"This is why people create rules for worlds, I suppose."
[23:11]	<UNOwen>	"Don't blame me, Orange."
[23:11]	* UNOwen	points at the other computer sitting right there.
[23:11]	<Orange>	Oh, I can blame you if I want. It's up to you to accept it.
[23:11]	* UNOwen	considers that statement.
[23:11]	<UNOwen>	"Mmm, true, true."
[23:12]	<Orange>	Oh Owen.
[23:12]	<UNOwen>	"Oi?"
[23:12]	<Orange>	I think they're finally starting something.. look.
[23:13]	* UNOwen	looks over there.
[23:13]	<UNOwen>	"Bah, that's nothing. That man is just trying to garner support."
[23:13]	<UNOwen>	"I'm not worrying until they come in here and kick us out."
[23:13]	<UNOwen>	"Which requires effort on their part."
[23:13]	<Orange>	Ok..
[23:13]	<UNOwen>	"Which seems to be lacking tonight."
[23:14]	<Gaatz>	Not really.
[23:14]	<Gaatz>	:p
[23:14]	* UNOwen	has been had! Is the jig up?
[23:14]	<Gaatz>	also, holy fuck
[23:14]	<UNOwen>	"Oh?"
[23:15]	<UNOwen>	"Hmm...."
[23:15]	<Orange>	Tell me you didn't just use that face Gaatz.
[23:15]	* UNOwen	scrolls back on the chat history.
[23:15]	<UNOwen>	"Nope, he did."
[23:15]	<UNOwen>	"Shameful, ecetera."
[23:16]	* UNOwen	looks around the room.
[23:16]	<UNOwen>	"Strange, I assumed there'd be a maid in here by now."
[23:16]	<UNOwen>	"So much for that false hope of initiative."
[23:16]	* UNOwen	looks back at the opening statements of the game.
[23:16]	<UNOwen>	"...Never mind."
[23:16]	* CHOAM	whispers from behind the fourth wall...
[23:17]	<nftyw>	Yeaah.
[23:17]	<CHOAM>	Initiative isn't bad or totally mistaken, it just doesn't always work~
[23:17]	<UNOwen>	"CHOAM, don't lie. You know there's no fourth wall here. Well, not a figurative one."
[23:17]	* nftyw	gets a mop, starts cleaning up the stage.
[23:17]	* UNOwen	looks at his room's walls.
[23:18]	<UNOwen>	"Gasp, a dragon has jumped on top of my keyboard!"
[23:18]	* UNOwen	's keyboard has just been jumped by a dragon!
[23:18]	<UNOwen>	nj nn rtfgjm
[23:18]	<UNOwen>	rth ,y7,lo9
[23:18]	<nftyw>	That's silly. Dragons don't -- yikes!
[23:18]	<UNOwen>	]hny54y6hb '.';
[23:19]	<UNOwen>	afbtrb tbb
[23:19]	* UNOwen	forcibly removes the DnD Mini dragon from his workspace.
[23:19]	<UNOwen>	"Sit down."
[23:19]	<nftyw>	Next time don't shake the desk
[23:20]	<UNOwen>	"We're working on it."
[23:20]	<Orange>	!
[23:20]	<Orange>	What is going on here!?
[23:20]	* UNOwen	has not played MGS!
[23:21]	<UNOwen>	"Well, you leave for a few minutes, and the world just goes to hell in a handbasket, doesn't it?"
[23:21]	<UNOwen>	"I told you this wasn't a very good world."
[23:22]	* UNOwen	:|
[23:22]	* UNOwen	:| :|
[23:22]	<UNOwen>	"The OOC channel is behind the curve, guys."
[23:22]	<Orange>	Your damn fault.
[23:23]	<UNOwen>	"Is anything ever your fault, out of curiosity?"
[23:24]	* UNOwen	goes back to this channel.
[23:25]	<UNOwen>	"All this running between channels is making me tired."
[23:25]	* nftyw	washes the windows.
[23:25]	<Orange>	Oh nftyw?
[23:25]	<UNOwen>	"Window, actually. But yeah, it does need a wash."
[23:25]	* Orange	throws Nftyw a hundred dollar bill.
[23:25]	<Orange>	You deserve it.
[23:25]	* nftyw	crumples it into a pocket. Thanks!
[23:25]	<UNOwen>	"Fun times."
[23:26]	* nftyw	sprays glass cleaner and cleans the thick, grimy dust away.
[23:26]	* UNOwen	warns this channel of trouble.
[23:26]	<UNOwen>	"Overlord Gaatz expresses his disapproval in the other tab even as I speak."
[23:26]	<UNOwen>	"We may be forcible removed."
[23:26]	<UNOwen>	"Forcibly, even."
[23:27]	* UNOwen	points to the this channel from the other one.
[23:27]	<UNOwen>	----------->
[23:27]	<Orange>	Oh my..
[23:28]	* UNOwen	voices his problems in the wrong channel.
[23:28]	<UNOwen>	"The Internet does not express my sarcasm very well."
[23:28]	<UNOwen>	"IRC expresses it even less."
[23:28]	<UNOwen>	"This is a problem."
[23:29]	<Orange>	Tsk tsk.
[23:30]	<Orange>	Again your problem Owen dear. You're always too :|, and we now know you by that.
[23:30]	<UNOwen>	"The folks over there-"
[23:30]	* UNOwen	points.
[23:30]	<UNOwen>	"-don't understand I was being sarcastic."
[23:31]	<UNOwen>	"They think I'm being serious."
[23:31]	* CHOAM	nods to affirm his listening.
[23:31]	<UNOwen>	"But the fact of the matter is this bloody game isn't serious at all, and neither am I."
[23:31]	<UNOwen>	"That's why this world exists."
[23:31]	<UNOwen>	"To be so very not serious."
[23:32]	<UNOwen>	ct5hbyhb njn c l, l,yl90p;98u
[23:32]	<UNOwen>	"I said get off, less-than-iconic DnD dragon!"
[23:32]	<Orange>	Typing in a cryptic language again?
[23:33]	<UNOwen>	"I blame myself, who is moving the dragon with my hand."
[23:33]	<UNOwen>	"It's not a real dragon at all."
[23:33]	<UNOwen>	"But it looks nice for only $4.99
[23:33]	* UNOwen	forgot his "
[23:33]	<Orange>	Stop worrying about your " "
[23:34]	<UNOwen>	"I" "r"e"f"u"s"e"""
[23:34]	<Orange>	You're such a child.
[23:34]	* UNOwen	"does things in quotes where he shouldn't be doing them."
[23:34]	<UNOwen>	"Why so serious, Orange?"
[23:34]	<UNOwen>	"Let's put a smile on that face!"
[23:35]	<UNOwen>	http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5RyohloMcbs
[23:35]	<Orange>	Oh no, I'm not serious at all.
[23:35]	<Orange>	Until you manage to make me angry for some odd reason/
[23:35]	<UNOwen>	"Good."
[23:35]	<UNOwen>	"Does linking 'UToobz' make you angry?"
[23:36]	<Orange>	It makes me lulz.
[23:36]	* UNOwen	nods.
[23:36]	<Orange>	Until you decide the link to be rick roll.
[23:36]	<UNOwen>	"Well, obviously. I mean, it's BANG!"
[23:37]	<UNOwen>	"Rickroll is old hat."
[23:37]	* CHOAM	just drops this here.
[23:37]	<CHOAM>	http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hi-a93TgzBw
[23:37]	<UNOwen>	That...link is purple for me.
[23:37]	<Orange>	Same here.
[23:37]	<huh>	http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ss9q2OZRjag does this count?
[23:37]	<CHOAM>	that's because I made it purple.
[23:38]	* UNOwen	has never seen the original Nyanroll.
[23:38]	<UNOwen>	"Weird, I thought I had always started with Chen."
[23:38]	<UNOwen>	"It, obviously."
[23:38]	<huh>	Nope, Macross.
[23:39]	<UNOwen>	"Yet another anime I'll never watch."
[23:39]	* UNOwen	points to his worthless "List of anime I need to watch that is many pages long".
[23:39]	<UNOwen>	"I need to watch these first."
[23:39]	<Orange>	Too bad its never ending.
[23:40]	<UNOwen>	"Hardly. It's just ethereal."
[23:40]	<UNOwen>	"I do know that the Umineko anime is at the top of the list. Considering I haven't played the game in two months, shows how pressing that list is."
[23:41]	<UNOwen>	"Uup, this is no good!"
[23:41]	<UNOwen>	"This game has gone on for an hour!"
[23:41]	<Orange>	Oh, did you hear Owen? One of the folks who works with that game died recently.
[23:41]	<UNOwen>	"That's very sad."
[23:41]	<UNOwen>	"But I told myself this world dies after one hour."
[23:41]	* UNOwen	poofs away this absurd world!