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- 1
- 00:00:06,757 --> 00:00:11,757
- Subtitles by explosiveskull
- www.OpenSubtitles.org
- 2
- 00:00:22,515 --> 00:00:25,585
- <i>Come on, it's just a word.</i>
- 3
- 00:00:25,618 --> 00:00:27,419
- <i>Say it, already.</i>
- 4
- 00:00:27,454 --> 00:00:28,555
- Alright, you got this.
- 5
- 00:00:32,659 --> 00:00:37,996
- I want your hot, throbbing...
- 6
- 00:00:38,030 --> 00:00:39,432
- Ugh.
- 7
- 00:00:39,466 --> 00:00:42,100
- Uh-uh. No. Gross.
- 8
- 00:00:42,134 --> 00:00:43,068
- And painful.
- 9
- 00:00:43,101 --> 00:00:45,438
- Who would ask for hot,
- throbbing anything?
- 10
- 00:00:45,472 --> 00:00:47,139
- Throbbing is what happens
- to your finger
- 11
- 00:00:47,172 --> 00:00:48,741
- when you slam it
- in the car door.
- 12
- 00:00:50,275 --> 00:00:51,611
- I want it now.
- 13
- 00:00:51,644 --> 00:00:55,113
- Your hot, throbbing...
- 14
- 00:00:58,451 --> 00:01:00,787
- Ok.
- 15
- 00:01:02,689 --> 00:01:03,823
- Give it to me.
- 16
- 00:01:03,857 --> 00:01:09,762
- And by "it", I mean I want
- your hot, throbbing... nope!
- 17
- 00:01:09,796 --> 00:01:10,597
- No!
- 18
- 00:01:10,630 --> 00:01:12,599
- Not at all convincing!
- 19
- 00:01:12,632 --> 00:01:14,132
- God, Luce, it's a word.
- 20
- 00:01:14,166 --> 00:01:16,201
- It's a word,
- just say it already.
- 21
- 00:01:16,736 --> 00:01:17,704
- Alright.
- 22
- 00:01:22,842 --> 00:01:26,411
- I want your hot, throbbing...
- 23
- 00:01:28,481 --> 00:01:29,549
- For the love of god!
- 24
- 00:01:29,582 --> 00:01:32,351
- Cock! Cock! Cock!
- 25
- 00:01:32,384 --> 00:01:33,486
- Cock! Cock!
- 26
- 00:01:33,520 --> 00:01:35,020
- Cock!
- 27
- 00:01:39,592 --> 00:01:45,498
- Oh... um, my friend has this
- farm and there's this rooster.
- 28
- 00:01:45,532 --> 00:01:46,799
- Troublemaker.
- 29
- 00:01:51,103 --> 00:01:52,304
- Alright.
- 30
- 00:01:52,337 --> 00:01:57,075
- Well, that is a... sentence
- that's just never gonna happen.
- 31
- 00:04:25,458 --> 00:04:27,560
- <i>Wait, what's he doing
- with his hand?</i>
- 32
- 00:04:27,593 --> 00:04:29,327
- <i>That actually feels good.</i>
- 33
- 00:04:29,361 --> 00:04:31,229
- <i>So that was an accident.</i>
- 34
- 00:04:31,263 --> 00:04:33,298
- You're so... good to me.
- 35
- 00:04:36,602 --> 00:04:37,235
- Hey.
- 36
- 00:04:37,269 --> 00:04:37,837
- Hmm?
- 37
- 00:04:37,870 --> 00:04:38,705
- Are we good?
- 38
- 00:04:38,738 --> 00:04:39,371
- Yeah.
- 39
- 00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:39,906
- You like that?
- 40
- 00:04:39,939 --> 00:04:40,440
- Ok. Good.
- 41
- 00:04:40,473 --> 00:04:43,576
- <i>Ok, sexy thoughts.</i>
- 42
- 00:04:43,609 --> 00:04:47,013
- <i>A cabana on a hot,
- tropical beach.</i>
- 43
- 00:04:47,046 --> 00:04:48,246
- <i>I'm getting a massage,</i>
- 44
- 00:04:48,280 --> 00:04:53,619
- <i>which suddenly turns into
- spontaneous, unbridled sex.</i>
- 45
- 00:04:53,653 --> 00:04:54,954
- <i>With Steve Carell.</i>
- 46
- 00:04:54,987 --> 00:04:57,957
- <i>Only like in his newer movies,
- with silver hair.</i>
- 47
- 00:04:57,990 --> 00:04:59,291
- Yes!
- 48
- 00:04:59,324 --> 00:04:59,859
- Yes!
- 49
- 00:04:59,892 --> 00:05:00,793
- I'm coming!
- 50
- 00:05:00,827 --> 00:05:01,961
- Yes!
- 51
- 00:05:01,994 --> 00:05:03,361
- Wheat-free waffles!
- 52
- 00:05:03,395 --> 00:05:05,363
- <i>Shit, did I just say
- that out loud?</i>
- 53
- 00:05:05,397 --> 00:05:06,799
- Huh?
- 54
- 00:05:06,833 --> 00:05:07,967
- Sorry.
- 55
- 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:08,868
- Just a second.
- 56
- 00:05:10,402 --> 00:05:11,904
- That was what I forgot
- at the store.
- 57
- 00:05:11,938 --> 00:05:13,806
- I couldn't remember all day.
- 58
- 00:05:15,475 --> 00:05:16,876
- No, no, no, no.
- 59
- 00:05:16,909 --> 00:05:17,577
- It's good.
- 60
- 00:05:17,610 --> 00:05:20,012
- My mind is completely free.
- 61
- 00:05:20,312 --> 00:05:21,981
- I'm ready now.
- 62
- 00:05:24,751 --> 00:05:27,987
- Yeah... I don't think you are.
- 63
- 00:05:38,363 --> 00:05:40,566
- We should get a ceiling fan.
- 64
- 00:05:41,834 --> 00:05:43,368
- Hey, what're you doing?
- 65
- 00:05:43,970 --> 00:05:45,872
- No-don't mess up my lists.
- 66
- 00:05:45,905 --> 00:05:46,839
- Why?
- 67
- 00:05:46,873 --> 00:05:48,474
- It's not like you ever finish
- any of them.
- 68
- 00:05:48,508 --> 00:05:49,307
- That is not true.
- 69
- 00:05:49,341 --> 00:05:50,710
- Just because you're
- angry, don't-
- 70
- 00:05:50,743 --> 00:05:51,544
- Ok, look.
- 71
- 00:05:51,577 --> 00:05:53,446
- Most women, during sex,
- you know,
- 72
- 00:05:53,479 --> 00:05:55,615
- they say things like...
- 73
- 00:05:55,648 --> 00:05:58,350
- I don't-like, "yes, yes,
- give it to me good".
- 74
- 00:05:58,383 --> 00:06:01,654
- Who says that?
- 75
- 00:06:01,687 --> 00:06:02,522
- People.
- 76
- 00:06:02,555 --> 00:06:04,056
- People who you know?
- 77
- 00:06:04,090 --> 00:06:05,958
- You honestly want me
- to yell out,
- 78
- 00:06:05,992 --> 00:06:07,927
- "Yes, yes, give it to me good"?
- 79
- 00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:11,363
- Well, it would be better
- than "wheat-free waffles".
- 80
- 00:06:11,396 --> 00:06:14,433
- Why don't you just admit
- that you're not into sex?
- 81
- 00:06:14,467 --> 00:06:16,903
- I'm so not not into sex.
- 82
- 00:06:16,936 --> 00:06:19,038
- You didn't even take off
- your pyjamas!
- 83
- 00:06:19,071 --> 00:06:21,373
- Yeah, well, they're comfortable!
- 84
- 00:06:21,941 --> 00:06:22,775
- What're you doing?
- 85
- 00:06:22,809 --> 00:06:24,076
- You gotta
- be kidding me.
- 86
- 00:06:24,110 --> 00:06:27,046
- I have work to do.
- 87
- 00:06:27,079 --> 00:06:27,747
- I'm on a deadline.
- 88
- 00:06:27,780 --> 00:06:30,016
- You work in the garage, alright?
- 89
- 00:06:30,049 --> 00:06:32,552
- Testing video games!
- 90
- 00:06:35,855 --> 00:06:37,456
- Don't judge me.
- 91
- 00:06:42,962 --> 00:06:44,530
- Sorry, Mr. Bach.
- 92
- 00:06:44,564 --> 00:06:50,335
- I need something with
- a little more spirit.
- 93
- 00:06:54,941 --> 00:06:56,408
- Great.
- 94
- 00:06:57,443 --> 00:06:58,744
- Where is my cord?
- 95
- 00:07:23,035 --> 00:07:25,872
- Oh my god, he's a regular.
- 96
- 00:07:30,042 --> 00:07:32,678
- Don't stop!
- 97
- 00:07:32,712 --> 00:07:39,018
- Oh my-oh my... that
- is a lot of vagina.
- 98
- 00:07:39,051 --> 00:07:42,021
- <i>Yes, yes, give it to me good!</i>
- 99
- 00:07:42,054 --> 00:07:45,925
- Oh my god, did she really
- just say that?
- 100
- 00:07:47,727 --> 00:07:49,428
- Thank you, sweetie.
- 101
- 00:07:50,663 --> 00:07:51,564
- I thought you were evolved.
- 102
- 00:07:51,597 --> 00:07:54,500
- We met at a film festival,
- for god's sake!
- 103
- 00:07:54,533 --> 00:07:55,635
- What're you talking about?
- 104
- 00:07:55,668 --> 00:07:59,438
- What I'm talking about is that.
- 105
- 00:07:59,472 --> 00:08:01,974
- What is that?
- 106
- 00:08:02,008 --> 00:08:03,576
- I don't know, a girl?
- 107
- 00:08:03,609 --> 00:08:04,477
- No.
- 108
- 00:08:04,510 --> 00:08:05,478
- I'm a girl.
- 109
- 00:08:05,511 --> 00:08:06,879
- That is a vixen.
- 110
- 00:08:06,913 --> 00:08:08,514
- Whatever.
- 111
- 00:08:08,547 --> 00:08:09,682
- Excuse me?
- 112
- 00:08:09,715 --> 00:08:11,050
- What, I'm not enough?
- 113
- 00:08:11,083 --> 00:08:12,051
- Look, ok, yeah.
- 114
- 00:08:12,084 --> 00:08:15,154
- I'm sorry you're upset,
- but you kinda have this,
- 115
- 00:08:15,187 --> 00:08:19,558
- like, irrational fear of
- intimacy or anything
- 116
- 00:08:19,592 --> 00:08:21,193
- that can't be put on a list.
- 117
- 00:08:21,227 --> 00:08:23,596
- You are talking sensuality to me
- as you are sitting there
- 118
- 00:08:23,629 --> 00:08:25,898
- hacking heads off?
- 119
- 00:08:25,932 --> 00:08:26,999
- Oh, is this funny to you?
- 120
- 00:08:27,033 --> 00:08:28,601
- Really?
- 121
- 00:08:31,837 --> 00:08:33,940
- Since when are you
- a porn person?
- 122
- 00:08:33,973 --> 00:08:38,878
- Well, I'm a guy,
- so since always.
- 123
- 00:08:41,714 --> 00:08:43,149
- Oh, see, that's bullshit.
- 124
- 00:08:43,182 --> 00:08:45,184
- I just got killed
- by crossfire again.
- 125
- 00:08:45,217 --> 00:08:47,053
- How are you being so
- nonchalant about this?
- 126
- 00:08:47,086 --> 00:08:47,987
- In this day in age,
- 127
- 00:08:48,020 --> 00:08:49,689
- when women are finally
- standing up to men
- 128
- 00:08:49,722 --> 00:08:51,557
- who use sex as a tool
- of oppression, you're-
- 129
- 00:08:51,590 --> 00:08:53,926
- Woah, woah,
- woah, woah, woah!
- 130
- 00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:56,228
- I'm not oppressing anyone, ok?
- 131
- 00:08:56,262 --> 00:09:00,066
- They put it out there,
- guys pay for it, and girls,
- 132
- 00:09:00,099 --> 00:09:02,001
- everyone's happy.
- 133
- 00:09:02,034 --> 00:09:05,037
- Have... have you ever watched
- a porn film?
- 134
- 00:09:05,071 --> 00:09:06,706
- I think I just saw plenty,
- 135
- 00:09:06,739 --> 00:09:09,041
- and I hardly think
- that the word film applies,
- 136
- 00:09:09,075 --> 00:09:11,978
- not when it degrades
- the entire female species.
- 137
- 00:09:12,011 --> 00:09:14,580
- Yeah, see, I don't think so.
- 138
- 00:09:14,613 --> 00:09:16,649
- I think it's just a business.
- 139
- 00:09:16,682 --> 00:09:17,683
- Oh.
- 140
- 00:09:17,717 --> 00:09:18,784
- Oh, ok. I see.
- 141
- 00:09:18,818 --> 00:09:21,587
- So it's just a collection of
- highly-skilled workers
- 142
- 00:09:21,620 --> 00:09:22,955
- providing a service.
- 143
- 00:09:22,989 --> 00:09:24,056
- Yeah, exactly.
- 144
- 00:09:24,090 --> 00:09:28,094
- And the best are banking
- millions and the rest are
- 145
- 00:09:28,127 --> 00:09:34,100
- compensated really well
- for their... artistry.
- 146
- 00:09:34,133 --> 00:09:35,534
- Artistry?
- 147
- 00:09:35,568 --> 00:09:36,969
- Yeah.
- 148
- 00:09:37,003 --> 00:09:38,604
- Mmmhmm. Yeah. Yes.
- 149
- 00:09:38,637 --> 00:09:40,940
- It's uh, it's kinda like you
- with your violin.
- 150
- 00:09:40,973 --> 00:09:41,907
- Right?
- 151
- 00:09:41,941 --> 00:09:43,042
- Is it so hard for you
- to understand that,
- 152
- 00:09:43,075 --> 00:09:47,546
- you know, this is how some
- people express themselves?
- 153
- 00:09:47,580 --> 00:09:49,982
- What I can't believe is that
- you are attempting
- 154
- 00:09:50,016 --> 00:09:54,954
- to draw a parallel
- between what I do and this.
- 155
- 00:09:54,987 --> 00:09:57,156
- That's because
- you're pornophobic.
- 156
- 00:09:57,189 --> 00:09:58,657
- That's not even a word.
- 157
- 00:09:58,691 --> 00:10:00,593
- You know, how uptight you are,
- 158
- 00:10:00,626 --> 00:10:03,162
- it's kinda like your
- whole life problem.
- 159
- 00:10:03,195 --> 00:10:04,964
- No, even words are
- too much for you.
- 160
- 00:10:04,997 --> 00:10:05,598
- We're done.
- 161
- 00:10:05,631 --> 00:10:07,166
- Wait, no, we're not done.
- 162
- 00:10:07,199 --> 00:10:08,100
- Lucy.
- 163
- 00:10:08,134 --> 00:10:08,934
- Come here.
- 164
- 00:10:08,968 --> 00:10:09,869
- Ow, Jesus. Come on.
- 165
- 00:10:09,902 --> 00:10:10,603
- Ugh.
- 166
- 00:10:10,636 --> 00:10:11,137
- Lucy, come back.
- 167
- 00:10:11,170 --> 00:10:12,071
- Hey! Wait!
- 168
- 00:10:12,104 --> 00:10:14,707
- Just try saying something racy.
- 169
- 00:10:14,740 --> 00:10:15,509
- Like what?
- 170
- 00:10:15,541 --> 00:10:18,177
- Like, I don't know,
- like... use
- 171
- 00:10:18,210 --> 00:10:21,213
- "hot, throbbing cock"
- convincingly in a sentence.
- 172
- 00:10:21,247 --> 00:10:22,815
- Why would anyone do that?
- 173
- 00:10:22,848 --> 00:10:24,784
- And by the way, since when
- do we spy on each other?
- 174
- 00:10:24,817 --> 00:10:25,651
- I mean, spying?
- 175
- 00:10:25,684 --> 00:10:26,185
- That's not cool.
- 176
- 00:10:26,218 --> 00:10:28,020
- I wasn't spying!
- 177
- 00:10:28,054 --> 00:10:29,989
- And I don't know
- who you are anymore.
- 178
- 00:10:30,022 --> 00:10:32,691
- Yeah, well I don't know
- you worse!
- 179
- 00:10:34,126 --> 00:10:36,896
- Well, I'm not gonna compete
- with all of that.
- 180
- 00:10:36,929 --> 00:10:39,665
- So... so you need to decide.
- 181
- 00:10:39,698 --> 00:10:42,034
- It's me or the porn!
- 182
- 00:10:44,904 --> 00:10:45,805
- Really?
- 183
- 00:10:45,838 --> 00:10:48,140
- That's what you consider
- an essential item?
- 184
- 00:10:48,174 --> 00:10:50,309
- He's autographed.
- 185
- 00:10:51,343 --> 00:10:52,845
- Come on, bud.
- 186
- 00:10:52,878 --> 00:10:55,047
- Don't-don't crease
- and don't break.
- 187
- 00:10:55,081 --> 00:10:57,616
- Alright, it's just
- you and me now.
- 188
- 00:11:09,762 --> 00:11:11,697
- I hope you get that stick
- out of your ass!
- 189
- 00:11:11,730 --> 00:11:12,832
- Why?
- 190
- 00:11:12,865 --> 00:11:15,034
- So you can use it
- on yourself?!
- 191
- 00:11:19,939 --> 00:11:20,739
- Hi, Mr. Glassell.
- 192
- 00:11:20,773 --> 00:11:22,007
- Good morning.
- 193
- 00:11:22,041 --> 00:11:23,943
- It was.
- 194
- 00:11:30,149 --> 00:11:30,816
- <i>Where are you?</i>
- 195
- 00:11:30,850 --> 00:11:31,350
- <i>You're late.</i>
- 196
- 00:11:31,383 --> 00:11:32,351
- <i>You're never late.</i>
- 197
- 00:11:32,384 --> 00:11:33,152
- <i>I'm worried.</i>
- 198
- 00:11:33,185 --> 00:11:34,987
- <i>Should I be worried?</i>
- 199
- 00:11:43,262 --> 00:11:43,929
- I'm coming.
- 200
- 00:11:43,963 --> 00:11:45,064
- Sorry.
- 201
- 00:11:48,367 --> 00:11:50,069
- Ok, so sorry.
- 202
- 00:11:50,903 --> 00:11:52,104
- Where have you been?
- 203
- 00:11:52,138 --> 00:11:53,706
- The bride's about
- to start trotting up.
- 204
- 00:11:53,739 --> 00:11:54,907
- Sorry.
- 205
- 00:11:56,008 --> 00:11:56,775
- A bride on a horse.
- 206
- 00:11:56,809 --> 00:11:57,977
- What could go wrong?
- 207
- 00:11:58,744 --> 00:12:00,012
- Play.
- 208
- 00:12:28,140 --> 00:12:29,909
- Hello there, Mr. Best Man.
- 209
- 00:12:30,510 --> 00:12:31,977
- Oh, no, that's actually
- my friend Grant.
- 210
- 00:12:32,011 --> 00:12:33,946
- I think he's just a groomsman.
- 211
- 00:12:37,049 --> 00:12:38,951
- Matrimony.
- 212
- 00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:42,955
- The commemoration of
- an unshakable bond.
- 213
- 00:12:45,525 --> 00:12:47,293
- Oh, dear me.
- 214
- 00:12:47,326 --> 00:12:50,029
- Oh my-oh my god.
- 215
- 00:12:50,062 --> 00:12:51,163
- Yeah, no, this wedding
- is awesome.
- 216
- 00:12:51,197 --> 00:12:52,264
- That could not
- have been the plan.
- 217
- 00:12:54,467 --> 00:12:55,502
- Oh gosh.
- 218
- 00:12:58,070 --> 00:12:59,271
- <i>Is that horse poo?</i>
- 219
- 00:12:59,305 --> 00:13:00,706
- <i>God, it smells.</i>
- 220
- 00:13:02,141 --> 00:13:03,309
- Pretend it's not there.
- 221
- 00:13:03,842 --> 00:13:07,346
- Oh, she's gonna remember
- this day, isn't she?
- 222
- 00:13:07,379 --> 00:13:09,215
- You wanted the horse, ok?
- 223
- 00:13:09,248 --> 00:13:11,784
- Well, if she cancels she still
- has to pay us, right?
- 224
- 00:13:11,817 --> 00:13:13,453
- Yes, especially because it was
- Grant who referred us
- 225
- 00:13:13,486 --> 00:13:14,720
- for the job.
- 226
- 00:13:14,753 --> 00:13:17,156
- I just-I'm sorry, I can't get
- over how he is so good-looking
- 227
- 00:13:17,189 --> 00:13:18,891
- and you never told me about him.
- 228
- 00:13:18,924 --> 00:13:20,192
- You don't date actual adults.
- 229
- 00:13:20,226 --> 00:13:21,160
- Kale?
- 230
- 00:13:21,193 --> 00:13:22,361
- He's an adult.
- 231
- 00:13:22,394 --> 00:13:24,363
- He picks you up on a skateboard.
- 232
- 00:13:24,396 --> 00:13:25,231
- It's ok, everyone.
- 233
- 00:13:25,264 --> 00:13:26,265
- I'm ok.
- 234
- 00:13:26,533 --> 00:13:28,100
- Why are you giving my dude
- such a hard
- 235
- 00:13:28,133 --> 00:13:29,034
- time when this one over here,
- 236
- 00:13:29,068 --> 00:13:31,937
- she's sleeping on Captain
- America sheets.
- 237
- 00:13:33,072 --> 00:13:33,906
- Lucy, are you alright?
- 238
- 00:13:33,939 --> 00:13:34,441
- Are you crying?
- 239
- 00:13:34,474 --> 00:13:35,374
- I was just kidding.
- 240
- 00:13:35,407 --> 00:13:38,277
- Yeah, it was just a joke
- about the sheets.
- 241
- 00:13:38,578 --> 00:13:40,079
- Jeff left me.
- 242
- 00:13:40,913 --> 00:13:42,348
- He moved out.
- 243
- 00:13:43,249 --> 00:13:45,050
- <i>Are you ok?</i>
- 244
- 00:13:45,084 --> 00:13:47,019
- I'm so sorry, Luce,
- that's terrible.
- 245
- 00:13:55,027 --> 00:13:56,395
- Ok, now.
- 246
- 00:13:56,429 --> 00:13:57,363
- Where were we?
- 247
- 00:13:57,396 --> 00:13:59,031
- We're going to get married now.
- 248
- 00:13:59,064 --> 00:14:00,866
- Yeah.
- 249
- 00:14:09,174 --> 00:14:11,377
- I don't know,
- it's all such a blur.
- 250
- 00:14:11,410 --> 00:14:12,278
- Actually, no.
- 251
- 00:14:12,311 --> 00:14:14,013
- It started while
- we were having sex, and-
- 252
- 00:14:14,046 --> 00:14:15,582
- Ok.
- 253
- 00:14:15,615 --> 00:14:18,150
- Is that why you guys fought?
- 254
- 00:14:18,183 --> 00:14:21,153
- I remembered an item
- off of my grocery list, so-
- 255
- 00:14:21,186 --> 00:14:22,821
- Oh, honey.
- 256
- 00:14:22,855 --> 00:14:24,990
- How do you expect to survive
- marriage week after week,
- 257
- 00:14:25,024 --> 00:14:26,191
- year after year?
- 258
- 00:14:26,225 --> 00:14:31,263
- Sex with the same person in
- the same order for 27 years.
- 259
- 00:14:31,297 --> 00:14:33,399
- Well, until you find yourself
- one day dressing up for the guy
- 260
- 00:14:33,433 --> 00:14:35,401
- who sprays for bugs.
- 261
- 00:14:35,435 --> 00:14:37,269
- Well, how do you expect
- to survive all that
- 262
- 00:14:37,303 --> 00:14:38,471
- if you can't focus now?
- 263
- 00:14:38,505 --> 00:14:43,208
- I might have focus issues
- but he is into porn, alright?
- 264
- 00:14:43,242 --> 00:14:44,176
- It's disgusting!
- 265
- 00:14:44,209 --> 00:14:47,079
- It was all over his computer,
- he is totally-
- 266
- 00:14:47,112 --> 00:14:48,380
- A man?
- 267
- 00:14:48,414 --> 00:14:51,116
- All men look at dirty pictures,
- married or not.
- 268
- 00:14:51,150 --> 00:14:53,118
- It's-it's how they maintain
- their vigour.
- 269
- 00:14:53,152 --> 00:14:53,952
- Right, Paul?
- 270
- 00:14:53,986 --> 00:14:55,020
- Well, it's-
- 271
- 00:14:55,054 --> 00:14:57,156
- When men start declining
- sexually by the age of 18.
- 272
- 00:14:57,189 --> 00:14:59,158
- Once they hit 30
- it's a ski slope.
- 273
- 00:14:59,191 --> 00:15:00,859
- I beg your pardon.
- 274
- 00:15:00,893 --> 00:15:02,294
- Except for Paul.
- 275
- 00:15:02,328 --> 00:15:03,996
- Who is, I'm sure,
- a sexual wonder.
- 276
- 00:15:04,029 --> 00:15:05,864
- Didn't your girlfriend leave
- you for a woman, though?
- 277
- 00:15:05,898 --> 00:15:06,700
- Ok, easy.
- 278
- 00:15:06,733 --> 00:15:08,334
- Wait, does this mean
- you have porn?
- 279
- 00:15:08,367 --> 00:15:08,901
- Hmm?
- 280
- 00:15:08,934 --> 00:15:10,169
- And go to strip clubs?
- 281
- 00:15:10,202 --> 00:15:11,170
- No, I do not go
- to strip clubs.
- 282
- 00:15:11,203 --> 00:15:12,171
- Ever?
- 283
- 00:15:12,204 --> 00:15:13,440
- I have, but it's not like I do.
- 284
- 00:15:13,473 --> 00:15:15,040
- Do you use the internet?
- 285
- 00:15:15,074 --> 00:15:15,608
- Define "use".
- 286
- 00:15:15,642 --> 00:15:16,443
- What about prostitutes?
- 287
- 00:15:16,476 --> 00:15:17,510
- No, not the ones
- who do it for crack.
- 288
- 00:15:17,544 --> 00:15:20,045
- I mean like the ones you go
- to that thing in Vegas
- 289
- 00:15:20,079 --> 00:15:21,080
- that I've seen on HBO.
- 290
- 00:15:21,113 --> 00:15:22,014
- Do you know what?
- I'm out.
- 291
- 00:15:22,047 --> 00:15:22,881
- I knew it.
- 292
- 00:15:22,915 --> 00:15:24,049
- Hello.
- 293
- 00:15:24,083 --> 00:15:25,452
- Ask me about sex.
- 294
- 00:15:25,485 --> 00:15:27,086
- I'm right here.
- 295
- 00:15:27,119 --> 00:15:28,020
- No.
- 296
- 00:15:28,053 --> 00:15:29,355
- Your enthusiasm is really
- un-relatable.
- 297
- 00:15:29,388 --> 00:15:30,222
- Oh, come on.
- 298
- 00:15:30,255 --> 00:15:32,157
- I got this whole library
- of cliterature.
- 299
- 00:15:32,191 --> 00:15:32,891
- You can just-
- 300
- 00:15:32,925 --> 00:15:34,126
- What?
- 301
- 00:15:34,159 --> 00:15:36,929
- Books you diddle to, babe.
- 302
- 00:15:36,962 --> 00:15:37,831
- Please, girl.
- 303
- 00:15:37,863 --> 00:15:40,065
- Tell me that you masturbate,
- at least.
- 304
- 00:15:41,100 --> 00:15:42,101
- No.
- 305
- 00:15:42,134 --> 00:15:43,936
- This is not about me, alright?
- 306
- 00:15:43,969 --> 00:15:45,404
- This is about my
- boyfriend leaving
- 307
- 00:15:45,438 --> 00:15:48,575
- because I think being a pervert
- is really inappropriate.
- 308
- 00:15:48,608 --> 00:15:54,980
- I also have blindfolds,
- handcuffs, vibrators...
- 309
- 00:15:57,049 --> 00:15:58,150
- Priscilla has them, too!
- 310
- 00:15:58,183 --> 00:16:00,219
- Oh, the buzz buzz,
- not the rest of it.
- 311
- 00:16:00,252 --> 00:16:01,153
- You do?
- 312
- 00:16:01,186 --> 00:16:02,154
- It's called a personal massager.
- 313
- 00:16:02,187 --> 00:16:03,490
- I got it at Brookestone.
- 314
- 00:16:03,523 --> 00:16:05,324
- Really?
- 315
- 00:16:05,357 --> 00:16:06,325
- Oh.
- 316
- 00:16:06,358 --> 00:16:10,129
- Well... but you have Stanley.
- 317
- 00:16:10,162 --> 00:16:12,432
- Vibrators are necessary,
- my dear.
- 318
- 00:16:12,465 --> 00:16:14,366
- Because life is short
- 319
- 00:16:14,400 --> 00:16:17,637
- and explaining things
- to men is long.
- 320
- 00:16:38,458 --> 00:16:40,593
- <i>Sex to do list.</i>
- 321
- 00:16:40,627 --> 00:16:44,096
- <i>Number one.
- Watch 25 porn films.</i>
- 322
- 00:16:44,129 --> 00:16:47,434
- <i>Number two.
- Go to a sex store.</i>
- 323
- 00:16:47,467 --> 00:16:50,302
- <i>Number three.
- Read cliterature.</i>
- 324
- 00:16:50,335 --> 00:16:52,539
- <i>Number four.
- Visit strip club.</i>
- 325
- 00:16:52,572 --> 00:16:54,139
- <i>Number five.
- Sex toy party.</i>
- 326
- 00:16:54,173 --> 00:16:55,708
- <i>Number six.
- Sex seminar.</i>
- 327
- 00:16:55,742 --> 00:16:57,242
- <i>Number seven.
- Test vibrators.</i>
- 328
- 00:16:57,276 --> 00:16:59,479
- <i>Number eight. Internet porn,
- view some.</i>
- 329
- 00:16:59,512 --> 00:17:01,648
- <i>Number nine.
- Consult a sex expert.</i>
- 330
- 00:17:01,681 --> 00:17:03,450
- <i>Number 10.
- Brothel, visit.</i>
- 331
- 00:17:03,483 --> 00:17:06,018
- <i>Number 11.
- Meet a porn star.</i>
- 332
- 00:17:06,051 --> 00:17:07,252
- <i>Number 12...</i>
- 333
- 00:17:07,286 --> 00:17:11,156
- <i>Use "hot, throbbing cock"
- convincingly in a sentence.</i>
- 334
- 00:17:11,190 --> 00:17:12,525
- There.
- 335
- 00:17:12,559 --> 00:17:17,095
- And I can even check
- the last one off right now.
- 336
- 00:17:23,368 --> 00:17:25,672
- For the love of god, cock!
- 337
- 00:17:25,705 --> 00:17:28,173
- <i>Cock! Cock! Cock!</i>
- 338
- 00:17:28,207 --> 00:17:29,609
- <i>Cock! Cock.</i>
- 339
- 00:17:29,642 --> 00:17:31,210
- I want your cock!
- 340
- 00:17:32,612 --> 00:17:34,112
- Well done.
- 341
- 00:17:35,180 --> 00:17:36,281
- Cock.
- 342
- 00:17:53,500 --> 00:17:55,000
- God!
- 343
- 00:17:57,737 --> 00:17:58,538
- Hey!
- 344
- 00:17:58,571 --> 00:18:00,072
- Woah!
- 345
- 00:18:00,105 --> 00:18:02,809
- Oh, Grant, you gotta go
- check out the ballroom, man.
- 346
- 00:18:02,842 --> 00:18:04,544
- The bridal party's twerkin'.
- 347
- 00:18:06,211 --> 00:18:06,646
- Woah.
- 348
- 00:18:06,679 --> 00:18:07,279
- You're kidding.
- 349
- 00:18:07,312 --> 00:18:08,515
- Ah, ah!
- 350
- 00:18:10,850 --> 00:18:12,217
- <i>Ugh!</i>
- 351
- 00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:15,420
- <i>Oh my god,
- are you serious?</i>
- 352
- 00:18:16,388 --> 00:18:17,356
- Hello?
- 353
- 00:18:17,389 --> 00:18:19,224
- <i>I can't believe you
- would do this to me.</i>
- 354
- 00:18:19,258 --> 00:18:19,826
- <i>What, Jeff?</i>
- 355
- 00:18:19,859 --> 00:18:21,628
- <i>I'm not enough for you?</i>
- 356
- 00:18:21,661 --> 00:18:23,028
- <i>Ugh!</i>
- 357
- 00:18:26,466 --> 00:18:27,800
- Everything alright in there?
- 358
- 00:18:29,101 --> 00:18:30,637
- <i>Coming in.</i>
- 359
- 00:18:38,811 --> 00:18:39,512
- You alright, love?
- 360
- 00:18:39,546 --> 00:18:41,246
- You want me to get the doctor?
- 361
- 00:18:42,314 --> 00:18:43,081
- What?
- 362
- 00:18:43,115 --> 00:18:44,149
- Why-no.
- 363
- 00:18:44,182 --> 00:18:45,150
- What, because
- I'm on the floor?
- 364
- 00:18:45,183 --> 00:18:46,084
- No.
- 365
- 00:18:46,118 --> 00:18:47,085
- No.
- 366
- 00:18:47,119 --> 00:18:48,120
- No, no, no.
- 367
- 00:18:48,153 --> 00:18:49,154
- I'm just medicating.
- 368
- 00:18:49,187 --> 00:18:50,122
- Tating.
- 369
- 00:18:50,155 --> 00:18:52,525
- Meditating.
- 370
- 00:18:52,559 --> 00:18:54,761
- I just heard crying
- or yelling.
- 371
- 00:18:54,794 --> 00:18:55,762
- Chanting.
- 372
- 00:18:55,795 --> 00:18:56,529
- Chanting?
- 373
- 00:18:56,563 --> 00:18:57,463
- Yeah.
- 374
- 00:18:57,497 --> 00:18:59,499
- Yeah?
- 375
- 00:18:59,532 --> 00:19:01,133
- Just coming to check to make
- sure everything's fine?
- 376
- 00:19:01,166 --> 00:19:02,401
- Yeah.
- 377
- 00:19:02,435 --> 00:19:05,237
- No, I always do like a little
- chant for the gride and broom.
- 378
- 00:19:05,270 --> 00:19:08,140
- Before the first dance.
- 379
- 00:19:08,173 --> 00:19:11,109
- How do you mean?
- 380
- 00:19:11,143 --> 00:19:14,212
- Oh, you know,
- like a chant.
- 381
- 00:19:14,246 --> 00:19:16,516
- Yeah, no, I don't.
- 382
- 00:19:16,549 --> 00:19:18,183
- Yeah, just sort of...
- 383
- 00:19:19,018 --> 00:19:27,827
- Close my eyes and go
- 384
- 00:19:27,860 --> 00:19:32,832
- Chanting...
- 385
- 00:19:32,865 --> 00:19:34,701
- Which obviously
- means something.
- 386
- 00:19:34,734 --> 00:19:35,501
- Unity.
- 387
- 00:19:35,535 --> 00:19:36,469
- Yeah.
- 388
- 00:19:36,502 --> 00:19:41,273
- Yeah. It means unity
- in that they're now one.
- 389
- 00:19:41,306 --> 00:19:43,443
- And yet they're two.
- 390
- 00:19:43,476 --> 00:19:47,145
- So, really it's about being
- strong enough
- 391
- 00:19:47,179 --> 00:19:51,517
- to make one one
- out of two ones.
- 392
- 00:19:51,551 --> 00:19:53,720
- And yet still be two.
- 393
- 00:19:53,753 --> 00:19:54,554
- Yeah.
- 394
- 00:19:54,587 --> 00:19:56,388
- Makes sense.
- 395
- 00:19:56,421 --> 00:19:58,423
- Totally get it.
- 396
- 00:19:58,458 --> 00:19:59,324
- You do?
- 397
- 00:19:59,358 --> 00:20:00,593
- Yeah.
- 398
- 00:20:00,627 --> 00:20:03,830
- It's... like a building.
- 399
- 00:20:03,863 --> 00:20:05,698
- It's only as strong
- as its weakest pillar.
- 400
- 00:20:05,732 --> 00:20:07,667
- Yeah, but is that true?
- 401
- 00:20:07,700 --> 00:20:10,268
- Because it seems to me that
- if you have enough pillars,
- 402
- 00:20:10,302 --> 00:20:12,204
- like say you're the Acropolis,
- 403
- 00:20:12,237 --> 00:20:15,775
- I think you could get away
- with one crappy pillar.
- 404
- 00:20:15,808 --> 00:20:16,876
- Sure.
- 405
- 00:20:16,909 --> 00:20:22,482
- Except for earthquakes,
- hurricanes, strong winds...
- 406
- 00:20:22,515 --> 00:20:23,315
- Aliens.
- 407
- 00:20:23,348 --> 00:20:25,217
- Well, we can't do much
- about that.
- 408
- 00:20:25,250 --> 00:20:27,219
- But you make a good point.
- 409
- 00:20:27,252 --> 00:20:29,421
- One in which I happen
- to believe in.
- 410
- 00:20:30,490 --> 00:20:32,925
- Uh... what-what point
- is that?
- 411
- 00:20:32,959 --> 00:20:36,194
- Well, you can't be useful
- in a two
- 412
- 00:20:36,228 --> 00:20:39,197
- until you figure yourself
- out as a one.
- 413
- 00:20:40,733 --> 00:20:41,734
- Hmm.
- 414
- 00:20:42,969 --> 00:20:44,236
- Cocktail?
- 415
- 00:20:44,269 --> 00:20:45,872
- Oh, I'm fine, thanks.
- 416
- 00:20:45,905 --> 00:20:47,205
- Well, here's to me.
- 417
- 00:20:47,239 --> 00:20:48,608
- That was brilliant.
- 418
- 00:20:48,641 --> 00:20:49,509
- But you're right.
- 419
- 00:20:49,542 --> 00:20:50,877
- No time for cocktails.
- 420
- 00:20:50,910 --> 00:20:58,551
- The two ones must waltz
- so this one one must play.
- 421
- 00:20:58,584 --> 00:20:59,686
- Ok.
- 422
- 00:21:03,990 --> 00:21:05,223
- Alrighty.
- 423
- 00:21:05,257 --> 00:21:06,492
- Hey.
- 424
- 00:21:06,526 --> 00:21:08,594
- Don't you need this?
- 425
- 00:21:10,029 --> 00:21:12,665
- Or you chant the waltz, too?
- 426
- 00:21:12,699 --> 00:21:14,500
- Sometimes.
- 427
- 00:21:28,748 --> 00:21:30,282
- I'm not pornophobic.
- 428
- 00:21:34,554 --> 00:21:36,022
- <i>All men look at dirty pictures.</i>
- 429
- 00:21:36,055 --> 00:21:39,257
- Oh, Jeff.
- 430
- 00:21:39,291 --> 00:21:41,627
- Yes, yes, give it to me good.
- 431
- 00:21:41,661 --> 00:21:43,930
- <i>You're pornophobic.</i>
- 432
- 00:21:43,963 --> 00:21:47,567
- <i>I cannot drink her blood,
- she's pornophobic.</i>
- 433
- 00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:48,801
- <i>Am I not enough?</i>
- 434
- 00:21:48,835 --> 00:21:51,604
- <i>Looks like she's suffering
- from stage four pornophobia.</i>
- 435
- 00:21:51,637 --> 00:21:53,940
- Say something racy.
- 436
- 00:21:53,973 --> 00:21:55,441
- <i>It's a word.</i>
- 437
- 00:21:55,475 --> 00:21:56,809
- Just say it already.
- 438
- 00:21:56,843 --> 00:21:58,044
- Pornophobic.
- 439
- 00:21:58,077 --> 00:21:59,045
- <i>Jeff left me.</i>
- 440
- 00:21:59,078 --> 00:22:00,780
- <i>Pornophobic.</i>
- 441
- 00:22:00,813 --> 00:22:03,983
- <i>Today we gather here
- to remember Lucy Neal,</i>
- 442
- 00:22:04,016 --> 00:22:08,286
- <i>who died alone from pornophobia.</i>
- 443
- 00:22:08,320 --> 00:22:11,691
- <i>She died in the house she
- inherited from her grandmother</i>
- 444
- 00:22:11,724 --> 00:22:15,895
- <i>that she was only able to
- fill with unfinished lists,</i>
- 445
- 00:22:15,928 --> 00:22:16,996
- <i>not love.</i>
- 446
- 00:22:17,029 --> 00:22:18,931
- You're pornophobic!
- 447
- 00:22:37,884 --> 00:22:38,885
- Ok.
- 448
- 00:22:45,124 --> 00:22:47,460
- <i>Sexpressions of Lust?</i>
- 449
- 00:22:47,493 --> 00:22:48,895
- <i>Please.</i>
- 450
- 00:22:54,634 --> 00:22:57,570
- <i>Madame Mischief's
- Boudoir Secrets.</i>
- 451
- 00:22:57,603 --> 00:22:59,639
- <i>Maybe it's a historical fiction?</i>
- 452
- 00:22:59,672 --> 00:23:01,841
- <i>And who doesn't like secrets?</i>
- 453
- 00:23:02,508 --> 00:23:05,011
- <i>Better get one more for back-up.</i>
- 454
- 00:23:06,145 --> 00:23:08,681
- Bad Sally.
- 455
- 00:23:08,714 --> 00:23:10,583
- That can't be right.
- 456
- 00:23:44,416 --> 00:23:45,718
- Oh god.
- 457
- 00:24:03,135 --> 00:24:04,904
- Faylene springs from the house
- 458
- 00:24:04,937 --> 00:24:07,573
- as Michele passionately
- gives chase.
- 459
- 00:24:07,607 --> 00:24:09,742
- <i>Running for her life, Michele
- grabs Faylene's wrist</i>
- 460
- 00:24:09,775 --> 00:24:15,014
- <i>and twirls her until he backs
- her into an erect pillar.</i>
- 461
- 00:24:15,047 --> 00:24:16,949
- <i>He could almost taste
- her ruby lips</i>
- 462
- 00:24:16,983 --> 00:24:21,988
- <i>but Faylene thrusts her knee
- into Michele, spins him around.</i>
- 463
- 00:24:22,021 --> 00:24:23,022
- <i>Seizing the moment,</i>
- 464
- 00:24:23,055 --> 00:24:24,657
- <i>Faylene pulls out a hidden
- pistol sheathed</i>
- 465
- 00:24:24,690 --> 00:24:27,894
- <i>on her thigh and pulls it
- up to his chin.</i>
- 466
- 00:24:29,929 --> 00:24:31,564
- <i>And then stops.</i>
- 467
- 00:24:38,905 --> 00:24:41,007
- <i>Michele takes one strong finger</i>
- 468
- 00:24:41,040 --> 00:24:42,975
- <i>and slowly drags
- the pistol downwards.</i>
- 469
- 00:24:43,009 --> 00:24:44,944
- <i>Faylene watches in wonder
- as the cold steel surrenders</i>
- 470
- 00:24:44,977 --> 00:24:47,412
- <i>to its final destination.</i>
- 471
- 00:24:47,880 --> 00:24:49,414
- <i>Michele's manhood.</i>
- 472
- 00:24:50,483 --> 00:24:54,654
- <i>Michele walks his finger across
- the barrel and cocks the gun.</i>
- 473
- 00:24:54,687 --> 00:24:58,024
- <i>Faylene knows what she wants
- and she decides to take it.</i>
- 474
- 00:25:11,704 --> 00:25:13,472
- Whew.
- 475
- 00:25:25,651 --> 00:25:27,019
- <i>Salt shaker is done.</i>
- 476
- 00:25:27,053 --> 00:25:29,021
- <i>I can check that off my list.</i>
- 477
- 00:25:39,966 --> 00:25:41,968
- Hello.
- 478
- 00:25:42,001 --> 00:25:46,105
- We have chocolate,
- mimosas, tissues, sympathy.
- 479
- 00:25:46,138 --> 00:25:47,673
- Wait, why do you look
- so good?
- 480
- 00:25:47,707 --> 00:25:48,941
- Where did you get
- those jeans?
- 481
- 00:25:48,975 --> 00:25:49,575
- No reason.
- 482
- 00:25:49,608 --> 00:25:50,242
- Nowhere.
- 483
- 00:25:50,276 --> 00:25:52,144
- And pity's not why I called.
- 484
- 00:25:52,178 --> 00:25:53,913
- I told you we need
- When Harry Met Sally.
- 485
- 00:25:53,946 --> 00:25:54,780
- Mmmhmm.
- 486
- 00:25:54,814 --> 00:25:56,015
- You do chocolates,
- I'm on cocktails.
- 487
- 00:25:56,048 --> 00:25:57,083
- No, really.
- 488
- 00:25:57,116 --> 00:25:58,584
- I'm fine.
- 489
- 00:25:58,617 --> 00:25:59,552
- I am.
- 490
- 00:25:59,585 --> 00:26:01,087
- For, I have renewed life purpose
- in the form
- 491
- 00:26:01,120 --> 00:26:03,823
- of a research project
- with which I need your help.
- 492
- 00:26:04,857 --> 00:26:05,725
- She said research.
- 493
- 00:26:05,758 --> 00:26:07,093
- She called me for research.
- 494
- 00:26:07,126 --> 00:26:07,893
- You're losing it.
- 495
- 00:26:09,929 --> 00:26:13,099
- We're doing number two and the
- train is leaving in one minute.
- 496
- 00:26:15,601 --> 00:26:18,704
- Guys, do you think
- I'm gonna need this?
- 497
- 00:26:20,072 --> 00:26:21,674
- Best break-up ever.
- 498
- 00:26:21,707 --> 00:26:23,209
- Oh god.
- 499
- 00:26:32,918 --> 00:26:37,223
- This is your Nissan Leaf,
- this is your Mercedes C Class,
- 500
- 00:26:37,256 --> 00:26:43,295
- and this is the Maserati
- of vibrators.
- 501
- 00:26:43,329 --> 00:26:48,134
- A serious piece of equipment for
- only the most experienced user.
- 502
- 00:26:48,634 --> 00:26:49,702
- Oh.
- 503
- 00:26:49,735 --> 00:26:51,570
- Sold.
- 504
- 00:26:52,571 --> 00:26:55,975
- <i>Using it could desensitize
- you to men forever.</i>
- 505
- 00:26:56,275 --> 00:26:57,743
- <i>I'll take one.</i>
- 506
- 00:27:05,284 --> 00:27:06,152
- <i>Hey, Luce!</i>
- 507
- 00:27:06,185 --> 00:27:08,220
- <i>I found something for ya.</i>
- 508
- 00:27:08,954 --> 00:27:11,057
- He doesn't say
- irritating things,
- 509
- 00:27:11,090 --> 00:27:14,760
- he's a feminist, doesn't watch
- football, or fart.
- 510
- 00:27:14,794 --> 00:27:17,063
- Well, none of them do at first.
- 511
- 00:27:25,871 --> 00:27:29,775
- Can I help you
- with that cock ring?
- 512
- 00:27:29,809 --> 00:27:30,776
- No.
- 513
- 00:27:30,810 --> 00:27:31,777
- No, I got this.
- 514
- 00:27:31,811 --> 00:27:33,312
- I was just checking...
- 515
- 00:27:34,213 --> 00:27:35,614
- Sure.
- 516
- 00:27:42,288 --> 00:27:44,023
- <i>Everything alright over there?</i>
- 517
- 00:27:44,491 --> 00:27:49,028
- Sorry, just um...
- looking for...
- 518
- 00:27:50,796 --> 00:27:52,264
- for a Mother's Day gift.
- 519
- 00:27:52,298 --> 00:27:53,399
- Oh.
- 520
- 00:27:53,433 --> 00:27:55,301
- You know, I was wondering
- what a nice girl like you
- 521
- 00:27:55,334 --> 00:27:57,103
- was doing in a place
- like this.
- 522
- 00:27:57,136 --> 00:27:59,738
- I could ask you
- the same thing.
- 523
- 00:27:59,772 --> 00:28:01,207
- Go ahead.
- 524
- 00:28:03,443 --> 00:28:07,346
- What's a nice girl like you
- doing in a place like this?
- 525
- 00:28:08,013 --> 00:28:08,948
- Oh...
- 526
- 00:28:12,051 --> 00:28:12,985
- Oh!
- 527
- 00:28:13,018 --> 00:28:13,919
- Busy day you got there.
- 528
- 00:28:13,953 --> 00:28:14,753
- Oh-
- 529
- 00:28:14,787 --> 00:28:15,788
- Uh, it's amazing
- you have the time
- 530
- 00:28:15,821 --> 00:28:20,292
- with all the violin playing
- and the chanting.
- 531
- 00:28:20,326 --> 00:28:21,727
- Of course you remember me.
- 532
- 00:28:21,760 --> 00:28:23,729
- It's not every day I run
- into a beautiful girl
- 533
- 00:28:23,762 --> 00:28:26,999
- with such a propensity
- for crouching.
- 534
- 00:28:27,900 --> 00:28:31,137
- <i>Did he actually just use
- the word "propensity"?</i>
- 535
- 00:28:33,706 --> 00:28:35,074
- Oh hey.
- 536
- 00:28:35,875 --> 00:28:37,343
- Adopted this puppy.
- 537
- 00:28:38,244 --> 00:28:40,045
- And breakfast is ready.
- 538
- 00:28:41,213 --> 00:28:43,115
- And the dishes are done.
- 539
- 00:28:44,451 --> 00:28:46,952
- Hey, you're the best man
- from the wedding
- 540
- 00:28:46,986 --> 00:28:48,287
- with the pooping horse?
- 541
- 00:28:48,320 --> 00:28:50,856
- Oh, yeah, I was just
- a groomsman.
- 542
- 00:28:50,890 --> 00:28:52,825
- Oh, well, I'm Nessa.
- 543
- 00:28:52,858 --> 00:28:54,293
- I was a part of the quartet.
- 544
- 00:28:54,326 --> 00:28:56,128
- Oh, yeah. You guys
- were great.
- 545
- 00:28:56,162 --> 00:28:57,796
- Thank you.
- 546
- 00:28:57,830 --> 00:28:59,432
- I play the cello.
- 547
- 00:28:59,466 --> 00:29:00,467
- Um, yeah.
- 548
- 00:29:00,500 --> 00:29:02,968
- It's, you know, the big one
- between your legs?
- 549
- 00:29:03,002 --> 00:29:05,871
- Lucy over here,
- she plays the violin.
- 550
- 00:29:05,905 --> 00:29:08,107
- So it's Lucy, is it?
- 551
- 00:29:08,140 --> 00:29:10,309
- So fancy meeting you here.
- 552
- 00:29:10,342 --> 00:29:12,811
- What're you doing?
- 553
- 00:29:12,845 --> 00:29:14,947
- Oh yeah, um, good question.
- 554
- 00:29:14,980 --> 00:29:16,715
- I'm looking for a Mother's
- Day gift.
- 555
- 00:29:16,749 --> 00:29:18,751
- Oh, really?
- 556
- 00:29:18,784 --> 00:29:20,052
- Me too.
- 557
- 00:29:20,085 --> 00:29:23,822
- I mean, I would never be here
- for myself.
- 558
- 00:29:25,024 --> 00:29:26,459
- Or would I?
- 559
- 00:29:26,493 --> 00:29:27,726
- Nessa.
- 560
- 00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:30,763
- Uh, I'm actually
- an architect.
- 561
- 00:29:30,796 --> 00:29:32,031
- Paul Goodwin works at my firm.
- 562
- 00:29:32,064 --> 00:29:33,265
- Right.
- 563
- 00:29:33,299 --> 00:29:37,136
- Yeah, I vaguely remember him
- mentioning something like that.
- 564
- 00:29:37,169 --> 00:29:39,038
- I'm ah, working on
- a job upstairs
- 565
- 00:29:39,071 --> 00:29:40,339
- to reconfigure
- the office space.
- 566
- 00:29:40,372 --> 00:29:41,575
- Oh.
- 567
- 00:29:41,608 --> 00:29:43,342
- Not nearly as interesting as
- what's going on on that list.
- 568
- 00:29:43,375 --> 00:29:44,176
- Oh, no.
- 569
- 00:29:44,210 --> 00:29:48,080
- This is purely a
- research project.
- 570
- 00:29:48,113 --> 00:29:48,948
- Yeah, honestly
- I can't help it.
- 571
- 00:29:48,981 --> 00:29:53,953
- I went to Harvard
- so I'm research-y.
- 572
- 00:29:53,986 --> 00:29:54,987
- Actually, that's where
- I met Paul.
- 573
- 00:29:55,020 --> 00:29:56,121
- Really?
- 574
- 00:29:56,155 --> 00:29:59,058
- You're using the H-bomb
- on the best man?
- 575
- 00:29:59,091 --> 00:29:59,858
- I just can't.
- 576
- 00:29:59,892 --> 00:30:00,859
- I'm gonna go talk
- to Priscilla.
- 577
- 00:30:00,893 --> 00:30:03,062
- And wha the hell is up
- with your lips, girl?
- 578
- 00:30:06,332 --> 00:30:08,167
- I'm Grant.
- 579
- 00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:09,768
- Who works here?
- 580
- 00:30:10,269 --> 00:30:11,971
- Did I hear you say you
- work here?
- 581
- 00:30:13,372 --> 00:30:15,374
- Why, yes he does.
- 582
- 00:30:17,042 --> 00:30:19,111
- So does she.
- 583
- 00:30:19,144 --> 00:30:21,514
- I just wanna find out
- if this works.
- 584
- 00:30:21,947 --> 00:30:26,085
- Actually, sir, I am very
- familiar with this product.
- 585
- 00:30:26,118 --> 00:30:28,020
- It's one of my favourites.
- 586
- 00:30:28,053 --> 00:30:30,923
- In fact, I've got it on
- right now.
- 587
- 00:30:31,290 --> 00:30:33,058
- What do you mean,
- you're wearing it now?
- 588
- 00:30:33,092 --> 00:30:34,494
- On what?
- 589
- 00:30:34,527 --> 00:30:36,161
- On my lips.
- 590
- 00:30:36,195 --> 00:30:37,396
- You put it on your lips?
- 591
- 00:30:37,430 --> 00:30:42,268
- Uh, Luce, I don't think you put
- erection cream on your lips.
- 592
- 00:30:42,968 --> 00:30:44,136
- Oh my god.
- 593
- 00:30:45,838 --> 00:30:46,972
- Oh.
- 594
- 00:30:47,507 --> 00:30:49,041
- Excuse me?
- 595
- 00:30:49,074 --> 00:30:51,243
- Do these come in extra large?
- 596
- 00:30:55,881 --> 00:30:58,884
- Got you some ice
- from the cafe.
- 597
- 00:30:58,917 --> 00:31:00,219
- Thanks.
- 598
- 00:31:02,154 --> 00:31:08,027
- Yeah, I thought your lips
- looked a little...
- 599
- 00:31:08,060 --> 00:31:10,129
- You got a chant for
- this sort of thing?
- 600
- 00:31:11,297 --> 00:31:12,499
- Woah.
- 601
- 00:31:15,635 --> 00:31:17,236
- Can I have your number?
- 602
- 00:31:18,037 --> 00:31:19,138
- You want my number?
- 603
- 00:31:19,171 --> 00:31:20,473
- Yeah.
- 604
- 00:31:22,341 --> 00:31:23,576
- Wait, really?
- 605
- 00:31:23,610 --> 00:31:26,145
- I have a gig you might
- be interested in playing.
- 606
- 00:31:26,945 --> 00:31:28,347
- That's awesome.
- 607
- 00:31:29,014 --> 00:31:31,984
- I'll um, I'll wait out here.
- 608
- 00:31:36,556 --> 00:31:37,590
- Bye.
- 609
- 00:31:56,208 --> 00:31:59,211
- So his dad co-chairs this annual
- insurance commissioner's dinner
- 610
- 00:31:59,244 --> 00:32:01,146
- and he wants you and me
- to walk around
- 611
- 00:32:01,180 --> 00:32:03,082
- and do the wandering
- minstrel thing.
- 612
- 00:32:03,115 --> 00:32:04,484
- First the wedding
- and now this?
- 613
- 00:32:04,517 --> 00:32:05,984
- Is he your new booking agent?
- 614
- 00:32:06,018 --> 00:32:07,953
- Excuse me, why not all of us?
- 615
- 00:32:07,986 --> 00:32:10,956
- Uh, I don't know, but you did
- make it a point to tell him
- 616
- 00:32:10,989 --> 00:32:12,659
- that your legs are pretty
- occupied while you play.
- 617
- 00:32:13,593 --> 00:32:14,494
- Will he be there?
- 618
- 00:32:14,527 --> 00:32:15,928
- <i>He didn't say.</i>
- 619
- 00:32:15,961 --> 00:32:18,997
- So, with the exception
- of the H-bomb incident,
- 620
- 00:32:19,031 --> 00:32:20,999
- and putting erection cream
- on your lips,
- 621
- 00:32:21,033 --> 00:32:22,569
- I'd say this was
- very successful.
- 622
- 00:32:22,602 --> 00:32:25,137
- You had a nice conversation
- with a handsome man,
- 623
- 00:32:25,170 --> 00:32:29,676
- we got a gig out of nowhere,
- and you got Burt.
- 624
- 00:33:21,193 --> 00:33:22,495
- Hmm.
- 625
- 00:33:29,134 --> 00:33:31,638
- You know, after one week of
- being broken up with Jeff
- 626
- 00:33:31,671 --> 00:33:37,009
- after four years of dating and I
- cannot believe how great I feel.
- 627
- 00:33:37,042 --> 00:33:40,312
- Well, what I can't believe is
- that we're actually doing this.
- 628
- 00:33:40,345 --> 00:33:43,315
- Alright, Jersey, how we doin'?
- 629
- 00:33:43,348 --> 00:33:45,452
- All six of you.
- 630
- 00:33:45,485 --> 00:33:46,619
- Alright, first thing's first.
- 631
- 00:33:46,653 --> 00:33:47,587
- I'm gonna go grab us
- some drinks.
- 632
- 00:33:47,620 --> 00:33:51,023
- Alright, now for the sexiest
- identical twins
- 633
- 00:33:51,056 --> 00:33:53,158
- with the hottest dance moves.
- 634
- 00:33:53,192 --> 00:33:56,195
- Everybody give it up
- for Cherry and
- 635
- 00:33:56,228 --> 00:33:58,997
- ♪ ...Dallas. ♪
- 636
- 00:33:59,298 --> 00:34:00,265
- Dallas!
- 637
- 00:34:04,504 --> 00:34:06,639
- <i>Hey Wes, can I trouble you
- for two beers, mate?</i>
- 638
- 00:34:06,673 --> 00:34:07,674
- <i>Pretend like you don't
- know me.</i>
- 639
- 00:34:07,707 --> 00:34:09,107
- Brilliant.
- 640
- 00:34:10,175 --> 00:34:11,444
- Did he say Cherry and Dallas?
- 641
- 00:34:11,478 --> 00:34:14,046
- You know, this is not
- what I expected.
- 642
- 00:34:14,079 --> 00:34:14,481
- Shh.
- 643
- 00:34:14,514 --> 00:34:15,380
- Why?
- 644
- 00:34:15,414 --> 00:34:16,683
- Are you afraid I'm gonna
- wake them up?
- 645
- 00:34:16,716 --> 00:34:17,717
- Oh, come on.
- 646
- 00:34:17,750 --> 00:34:19,719
- They're performers and
- you're talking over them.
- 647
- 00:34:19,752 --> 00:34:21,019
- Don't be rude.
- 648
- 00:34:21,053 --> 00:34:22,087
- It's disrespectful.
- 649
- 00:34:22,120 --> 00:34:22,689
- I'm just saying.
- 650
- 00:34:22,722 --> 00:34:23,388
- Hi, Cynthia.
- 651
- 00:34:23,422 --> 00:34:24,524
- Loving the hair.
- 652
- 00:34:24,557 --> 00:34:25,625
- How are you doing tonight?
- 653
- 00:34:25,658 --> 00:34:26,358
- Hi.
- 654
- 00:34:26,391 --> 00:34:27,092
- Thank you.
- 655
- 00:34:27,125 --> 00:34:28,293
- Oh, it's a little cold
- in here.
- 656
- 00:34:28,327 --> 00:34:28,994
- Can I-
- 657
- 00:34:29,027 --> 00:34:29,696
- Actually, we're totally fine.
- 658
- 00:34:29,729 --> 00:34:31,063
- Why don't you keep the change?
- 659
- 00:34:31,096 --> 00:34:31,764
- You know what?
- 660
- 00:34:31,798 --> 00:34:32,765
- Throw that in for good measure.
- 661
- 00:34:32,799 --> 00:34:34,233
- Don't embarrass me.
- 662
- 00:34:34,266 --> 00:34:36,368
- Embarrassment's the least
- of your problems.
- 663
- 00:34:36,401 --> 00:34:38,070
- Ok, I need to level with you.
- 664
- 00:34:38,103 --> 00:34:39,338
- It's not cold in here.
- 665
- 00:34:39,371 --> 00:34:40,405
- It's optimal.
- 666
- 00:34:40,440 --> 00:34:42,140
- Get with the program.
- 667
- 00:34:43,743 --> 00:34:45,110
- Where are you going?
- 668
- 00:34:45,377 --> 00:34:46,613
- Getting with the program.
- 669
- 00:34:46,646 --> 00:34:47,647
- Don't do that!
- 670
- 00:34:47,680 --> 00:34:49,314
- Lucy, come back, please.
- 671
- 00:34:50,249 --> 00:34:51,183
- Hi.
- 672
- 00:34:51,216 --> 00:34:52,619
- Your wife didn't send me here
- to spy on you,
- 673
- 00:34:52,652 --> 00:34:53,820
- I promise.
- 674
- 00:34:53,853 --> 00:34:55,153
- Don't worry.
- 675
- 00:35:02,094 --> 00:35:06,031
- <i>I wonder how these girls stay
- in such good shape.</i>
- 676
- 00:35:07,132 --> 00:35:08,100
- Quick question for you.
- 677
- 00:35:08,133 --> 00:35:12,472
- Do you do pilates or...
- oh, wow.
- 678
- 00:35:14,674 --> 00:35:17,276
- Oh, nice, Luce.
- 679
- 00:35:17,309 --> 00:35:19,044
- Thank you so much.
- 680
- 00:35:29,822 --> 00:35:31,123
- <i>Wait a second.</i>
- 681
- 00:35:33,125 --> 00:35:35,762
- <i>She is totally thinking
- about her shopping list.</i>
- 682
- 00:35:35,795 --> 00:35:37,162
- Ha!
- 683
- 00:35:39,899 --> 00:35:41,300
- Woo!
- 684
- 00:36:10,295 --> 00:36:11,263
- Oh.
- 685
- 00:36:13,833 --> 00:36:14,801
- Ok.
- 686
- 00:36:23,810 --> 00:36:26,446
- I'm just gonna
- see what-
- 687
- 00:36:26,479 --> 00:36:27,379
- She's trying to take my money!
- 688
- 00:36:27,412 --> 00:36:29,381
- No, I can't make change?
- 689
- 00:36:30,248 --> 00:36:31,316
- No, you did not.
- 690
- 00:36:31,350 --> 00:36:32,652
- What were you thinking?
- 691
- 00:36:32,685 --> 00:36:34,887
- As pleasing as her
- vagina thrusts were,
- 692
- 00:36:34,921 --> 00:36:37,155
- it just-it was not
- a $20 kind of happy.
- 693
- 00:36:37,189 --> 00:36:39,525
- Welcome to the Pleasure
- Palace Party.
- 694
- 00:36:39,559 --> 00:36:42,294
- We got the dildos,
- we got the vibrators,
- 695
- 00:36:42,327 --> 00:36:45,665
- so look around,
- don't be shy.
- 696
- 00:36:45,698 --> 00:36:48,233
- If you wanna get to the top
- of the mountain
- 697
- 00:36:48,266 --> 00:36:49,869
- you gotta go equipped.
- 698
- 00:36:49,902 --> 00:36:51,203
- Oh.
- 699
- 00:36:52,204 --> 00:36:55,475
- I did learn one very important
- thing at the strip club.
- 700
- 00:36:55,508 --> 00:36:57,409
- If naked enough it
- doesn't matter
- 701
- 00:36:57,443 --> 00:36:58,878
- if you can actually dance.
- 702
- 00:36:58,911 --> 00:37:01,179
- Oh, I know what these are.
- 703
- 00:37:01,213 --> 00:37:02,849
- People use these for meditating.
- 704
- 00:37:03,382 --> 00:37:05,885
- No, those are Ben-Wa balls.
- 705
- 00:37:05,918 --> 00:37:07,520
- 50 Shades?
- 706
- 00:37:07,553 --> 00:37:08,521
- Book two?
- 707
- 00:37:08,554 --> 00:37:10,188
- Ben who?
- 708
- 00:37:10,723 --> 00:37:13,459
- You take two of those,
- you stick 'em up your lady,
- 709
- 00:37:13,493 --> 00:37:17,195
- and just hold them for
- a couple of hours, ok?
- 710
- 00:37:17,897 --> 00:37:19,398
- Wait, what?
- 711
- 00:37:19,432 --> 00:37:20,099
- Oh my god.
- 712
- 00:37:20,133 --> 00:37:21,901
- Those are for Kegel exercises.
- 713
- 00:37:21,934 --> 00:37:24,202
- You could do 'em in the car.
- 714
- 00:37:24,671 --> 00:37:26,873
- Shit, I'm doing them right now.
- 715
- 00:37:26,906 --> 00:37:29,909
- Experience intense natural
- pleasure as each weighted ball
- 716
- 00:37:29,942 --> 00:37:31,711
- rolls and moves with you
- to give you
- 717
- 00:37:31,744 --> 00:37:35,448
- a mind-blowing
- internal massage.
- 718
- 00:37:35,481 --> 00:37:40,887
- Now, you're gonna sculpt
- a banana into a penis
- 719
- 00:37:40,920 --> 00:37:42,855
- with your teeth.
- 720
- 00:37:46,358 --> 00:37:47,292
- Catch that!
- 721
- 00:37:47,325 --> 00:37:49,394
- Oh yeah, get that banana.
- 722
- 00:37:49,429 --> 00:37:52,397
- <i>Well, I'll never look at a
- banana the same way again.</i>
- 723
- 00:37:52,799 --> 00:37:54,399
- <i>And neither will Paul.</i>
- 724
- 00:37:54,667 --> 00:37:55,935
- <i>Sex toy party.</i>
- 725
- 00:37:55,968 --> 00:37:56,936
- <i>Check.</i>
- 726
- 00:38:17,790 --> 00:38:18,958
- Wait, why'd you stop?
- 727
- 00:38:18,991 --> 00:38:21,594
- Uh, nothing.
- 728
- 00:38:21,627 --> 00:38:22,695
- Nothing.
- 729
- 00:38:22,729 --> 00:38:25,965
- I think I just... I really need
- to go to the bathroom.
- 730
- 00:38:25,998 --> 00:38:26,866
- Oh my, well go!
- 731
- 00:38:26,899 --> 00:38:28,735
- It's right down there.
- 732
- 00:38:30,536 --> 00:38:33,973
- I don't think I can
- make it that far.
- 733
- 00:38:34,006 --> 00:38:34,941
- Oh god.
- 734
- 00:38:34,974 --> 00:38:35,842
- It's gonna come out.
- 735
- 00:38:35,875 --> 00:38:36,709
- What is?
- 736
- 00:38:41,413 --> 00:38:42,347
- Not a word.
- 737
- 00:38:42,615 --> 00:38:43,883
- Not a word.
- 738
- 00:38:44,550 --> 00:38:46,351
- Uh-uh.
- 739
- 00:38:47,419 --> 00:38:48,554
- Ok.
- 740
- 00:38:48,588 --> 00:38:49,287
- Oh.
- 741
- 00:38:49,321 --> 00:38:49,989
- Oh!
- 742
- 00:38:50,022 --> 00:38:51,356
- I don't think I can bend over.
- 743
- 00:38:51,389 --> 00:38:52,558
- Because there's a second one?
- 744
- 00:38:52,592 --> 00:38:52,992
- Three.
- 745
- 00:38:53,025 --> 00:38:53,960
- Oh!
- 746
- 00:38:53,993 --> 00:38:54,727
- There are three more.
- 747
- 00:38:54,761 --> 00:38:56,929
- I bought two boxes.
- 748
- 00:38:57,563 --> 00:38:58,831
- I see.
- 749
- 00:38:58,865 --> 00:38:59,832
- For Kegels.
- 750
- 00:38:59,866 --> 00:39:01,366
- Say no more.
- 751
- 00:39:03,970 --> 00:39:05,204
- I need you to pick it up.
- 752
- 00:39:05,238 --> 00:39:07,372
- You know, I didn't think there
- were limits to our friendship.
- 753
- 00:39:07,405 --> 00:39:08,674
- I realize it's just not true.
- 754
- 00:39:08,708 --> 00:39:09,942
- Oh, this is not funny.
- 755
- 00:39:09,976 --> 00:39:10,810
- It's not funny, ok?
- 756
- 00:39:10,843 --> 00:39:13,513
- I only wore these
- to a work function
- 757
- 00:39:13,546 --> 00:39:15,715
- because I knew we would
- be standing for three hours
- 758
- 00:39:15,748 --> 00:39:18,885
- and, you know,
- I wanted to tone.
- 759
- 00:39:20,987 --> 00:39:22,021
- Stop!
- 760
- 00:39:22,054 --> 00:39:23,055
- Stop, ok?
- 761
- 00:39:23,089 --> 00:39:25,057
- If you make me laugh another
- ball will pop out.
- 762
- 00:39:25,091 --> 00:39:26,793
- Oh god, I'm so...
- 763
- 00:39:26,826 --> 00:39:27,927
- I need help here. Please.
- 764
- 00:39:27,960 --> 00:39:29,495
- Ok, ok. Let's go.
- 765
- 00:39:33,065 --> 00:39:33,800
- What was that?
- 766
- 00:39:33,833 --> 00:39:35,001
- I don't know.
- 767
- 00:39:35,034 --> 00:39:37,737
- When I walk my legs just
- sort of rub together
- 768
- 00:39:37,770 --> 00:39:39,038
- and I'm already so, so-
- 769
- 00:39:39,071 --> 00:39:40,740
- oh my god, I might-
- 770
- 00:39:40,773 --> 00:39:41,373
- Hallelujah?
- 771
- 00:39:41,406 --> 00:39:42,108
- Yeah.
- 772
- 00:39:42,141 --> 00:39:44,342
- Ok, we're gonna
- have to risk it.
- 773
- 00:39:44,376 --> 00:39:45,912
- Lucy, if you do this
- while holding my hand
- 774
- 00:39:45,945 --> 00:39:47,547
- this friendship will
- never be the same.
- 775
- 00:39:47,580 --> 00:39:49,381
- Ladies, you look like
- you're having a good night.
- 776
- 00:39:49,414 --> 00:39:50,917
- Some of us more than others.
- 777
- 00:39:50,950 --> 00:39:51,918
- Hi.
- 778
- 00:39:51,951 --> 00:39:52,952
- What're you doing here?
- 779
- 00:39:52,985 --> 00:39:54,386
- Oh, seeing my dad.
- 780
- 00:39:54,419 --> 00:39:56,589
- He's on the board
- with the trust.
- 781
- 00:39:56,989 --> 00:39:58,423
- It's irrelevant.
- 782
- 00:39:58,457 --> 00:39:59,458
- Now I'm seeing you.
- 783
- 00:39:59,492 --> 00:40:00,960
- Have you met Priscilla?
- 784
- 00:40:00,993 --> 00:40:01,861
- No, how are you?
- 785
- 00:40:01,894 --> 00:40:02,895
- The leader of our quartet.
- 786
- 00:40:02,929 --> 00:40:05,898
- My dear friend, who always
- comes to my rescue.
- 787
- 00:40:05,932 --> 00:40:07,633
- Oh, you need a lot of that?
- 788
- 00:40:07,667 --> 00:40:09,602
- No, not at all,
- but even still,
- 789
- 00:40:09,635 --> 00:40:12,038
- she's just always waiting
- for the other ball to drop.
- 790
- 00:40:12,071 --> 00:40:14,339
- I mean shoe.
- 791
- 00:40:16,108 --> 00:40:17,610
- Is it hot in here?
- 792
- 00:40:17,643 --> 00:40:18,578
- Yeah, it is.
- 793
- 00:40:18,611 --> 00:40:19,779
- Hmm.
- 794
- 00:40:19,812 --> 00:40:23,082
- Um, I see someone that I...
- 795
- 00:40:23,115 --> 00:40:24,517
- I don't see anyone.
- 796
- 00:40:24,550 --> 00:40:26,752
- I'm just getting
- out of the way.
- 797
- 00:40:29,455 --> 00:40:30,556
- Are you tired?
- 798
- 00:40:30,590 --> 00:40:31,389
- Am I tired?
- 799
- 00:40:31,423 --> 00:40:33,025
- Yeah, you seem a bit
- out of breath.
- 800
- 00:40:33,059 --> 00:40:34,026
- Mmm-mmm.
- 801
- 00:40:34,060 --> 00:40:35,027
- Mmm-mmm.
- 802
- 00:40:35,061 --> 00:40:38,064
- No, I just sort of get
- that way when I play.
- 803
- 00:40:38,097 --> 00:40:39,165
- Oh, I get it.
- 804
- 00:40:39,198 --> 00:40:41,067
- You're amazing.
- 805
- 00:40:42,735 --> 00:40:43,870
- Sweet Jesus.
- 806
- 00:40:44,136 --> 00:40:45,504
- Oh, what was that?
- 807
- 00:40:45,538 --> 00:40:46,038
- Hmm?
- 808
- 00:40:46,072 --> 00:40:47,173
- That.
- 809
- 00:40:47,206 --> 00:40:51,077
- No, my back just gets that way
- when I stand and play.
- 810
- 00:40:51,110 --> 00:40:52,377
- Alright.
- 811
- 00:40:54,547 --> 00:40:55,648
- Are you cold?
- 812
- 00:40:55,681 --> 00:40:56,414
- Mmmhmm.
- 813
- 00:40:56,449 --> 00:40:57,049
- Yeah.
- 814
- 00:40:57,083 --> 00:40:58,117
- Oh, let's get you moving.
- 815
- 00:40:58,150 --> 00:40:58,918
- Oh.
- 816
- 00:40:58,951 --> 00:41:00,019
- Come on.
- 817
- 00:41:04,957 --> 00:41:06,492
- Ah.
- 818
- 00:41:06,926 --> 00:41:07,960
- You ok?
- 819
- 00:41:07,994 --> 00:41:09,028
- Yeah.
- 820
- 00:41:09,061 --> 00:41:10,563
- Yeah.
- 821
- 00:41:10,596 --> 00:41:12,131
- Just warming up a little.
- 822
- 00:41:14,166 --> 00:41:15,835
- If I didn't know better,
- 823
- 00:41:15,868 --> 00:41:17,203
- your lips look beautifully
- deflated this evening.
- 824
- 00:41:21,674 --> 00:41:24,010
- Women don't usually
- find me funny.
- 825
- 00:41:24,510 --> 00:41:26,746
- It's my pleasure.
- 826
- 00:41:27,013 --> 00:41:28,014
- Truly.
- 827
- 00:41:28,915 --> 00:41:29,682
- Oh.
- 828
- 00:41:30,716 --> 00:41:31,784
- Oh.
- 829
- 00:41:32,985 --> 00:41:34,453
- Oh, what was that?
- 830
- 00:41:34,487 --> 00:41:35,154
- What was what?
- 831
- 00:41:35,187 --> 00:41:36,489
- Something just hit my foot.
- 832
- 00:41:36,522 --> 00:41:37,123
- Is that a bird?
- 833
- 00:41:37,156 --> 00:41:38,124
- There's a bird?
- 834
- 00:41:39,225 --> 00:41:41,060
- Nope. Nope.
- 835
- 00:41:41,093 --> 00:41:42,194
- Sorry, my mistake.
- 836
- 00:41:42,228 --> 00:41:42,929
- Weird.
- 837
- 00:41:42,962 --> 00:41:43,996
- Anyway.
- 838
- 00:41:44,030 --> 00:41:44,897
- Hmm?
- 839
- 00:41:44,931 --> 00:41:45,898
- I was thinking...
- 840
- 00:41:45,932 --> 00:41:46,465
- Yeah?
- 841
- 00:41:46,499 --> 00:41:47,466
- If you're not too busy-
- 842
- 00:41:47,500 --> 00:41:48,034
- Never.
- 843
- 00:41:48,067 --> 00:41:48,834
- Or too hot.
- 844
- 00:41:48,868 --> 00:41:49,468
- Would you like to-
- 845
- 00:41:49,502 --> 00:41:50,169
- Yes.
- 846
- 00:41:50,202 --> 00:41:50,937
- Have dinner with me?
- 847
- 00:41:50,970 --> 00:41:52,238
- Dear god, yes!
- 848
- 00:42:03,082 --> 00:42:04,884
- So you call me up out of
- the blue to ask me
- 849
- 00:42:04,917 --> 00:42:05,885
- how good you were in bed?
- 850
- 00:42:05,918 --> 00:42:06,686
- Mmmhmm.
- 851
- 00:42:06,719 --> 00:42:07,687
- Out of a percentage
- out of 100.
- 852
- 00:42:07,720 --> 00:42:11,824
- But if you must, I will accept
- a letter grade.
- 853
- 00:42:14,660 --> 00:42:16,028
- Did you meet someone?
- 854
- 00:42:16,062 --> 00:42:16,896
- What?
- 855
- 00:42:16,929 --> 00:42:17,830
- No.
- 856
- 00:42:18,097 --> 00:42:18,898
- No.
- 857
- 00:42:18,931 --> 00:42:19,699
- I was just wondering-
- 858
- 00:42:19,732 --> 00:42:21,033
- You did.
- 859
- 00:42:21,067 --> 00:42:24,103
- You're seeing someone.
- 860
- 00:42:24,136 --> 00:42:25,237
- Yeah, I am.
- 861
- 00:42:25,271 --> 00:42:26,038
- I'm sorry.
- 862
- 00:42:26,072 --> 00:42:27,039
- It's very new-
- 863
- 00:42:27,073 --> 00:42:27,673
- No, no.
- 864
- 00:42:27,707 --> 00:42:29,208
- It's a-I'm relieved, ok?
- 865
- 00:42:29,241 --> 00:42:34,947
- 'Cause I'm... I'm also seeing
- someone else, too.
- 866
- 00:42:34,981 --> 00:42:35,815
- You are?
- 867
- 00:42:35,848 --> 00:42:37,083
- Yeah.
- 868
- 00:42:37,116 --> 00:42:37,750
- Huh.
- 869
- 00:42:37,783 --> 00:42:39,018
- Wow.
- 870
- 00:42:41,287 --> 00:42:42,221
- Halloween.
- 871
- 00:42:42,254 --> 00:42:42,788
- Yeah.
- 872
- 00:42:42,822 --> 00:42:44,623
- Right after we broke up.
- 873
- 00:42:44,657 --> 00:42:48,227
- Oh, or is that how she dresses
- all the time?
- 874
- 00:42:48,260 --> 00:42:49,996
- That's funny.
- 875
- 00:42:50,029 --> 00:42:52,064
- I miss your sense of humour.
- 876
- 00:42:52,865 --> 00:42:54,767
- Is that-I'm sorry, is that bad
- for me to say
- 877
- 00:42:54,800 --> 00:42:56,902
- that I miss something
- about you?
- 878
- 00:42:59,138 --> 00:43:03,042
- Uh... so, how are the-
- how's your lists coming?
- 879
- 00:43:03,075 --> 00:43:05,077
- Oh, very well, thank you.
- 880
- 00:43:05,111 --> 00:43:06,912
- Yeah, after the porn thing
- 881
- 00:43:06,946 --> 00:43:09,615
- I made a list that's
- all about sex.
- 882
- 00:43:09,648 --> 00:43:15,621
- And I recently went to both
- a porn shop and a strip club.
- 883
- 00:43:18,124 --> 00:43:19,025
- What?
- 884
- 00:43:19,058 --> 00:43:19,992
- You-no, you're...
- 885
- 00:43:20,026 --> 00:43:21,327
- you're hilarious.
- 886
- 00:43:21,360 --> 00:43:26,866
- You see, this-you, us
- being friends, this rocks.
- 887
- 00:43:26,899 --> 00:43:28,200
- Yeah, it's great.
- 888
- 00:43:28,234 --> 00:43:31,003
- Uh, but, sex with me.
- 889
- 00:43:31,037 --> 00:43:32,304
- How was it?
- 890
- 00:43:32,338 --> 00:43:33,572
- Oh, right.
- 891
- 00:43:33,606 --> 00:43:38,010
- Um... it was fine.
- 892
- 00:43:38,044 --> 00:43:40,713
- Jeff, literally choose
- any letter.
- 893
- 00:43:40,746 --> 00:43:41,881
- Ok, uh, geez.
- 894
- 00:43:41,914 --> 00:43:44,683
- Uh... like A through F,
- right?
- 895
- 00:43:44,717 --> 00:43:45,551
- Yes.
- 896
- 00:43:46,185 --> 00:43:47,620
- Ok.
- 897
- 00:43:47,653 --> 00:43:50,756
- Uh, you are a...
- 898
- 00:43:54,994 --> 00:43:56,695
- D.
- 899
- 00:43:56,729 --> 00:43:57,797
- It's in room D.
- 900
- 00:43:57,830 --> 00:43:58,532
- Are you sure?
- 901
- 00:43:58,564 --> 00:43:59,999
- It doesn't say
- "sex seminar".
- 902
- 00:44:00,032 --> 00:44:02,034
- They're not gonna
- call it that.
- 903
- 00:44:02,068 --> 00:44:03,002
- It's this one.
- 904
- 00:44:03,035 --> 00:44:03,936
- It has to be.
- 905
- 00:44:03,969 --> 00:44:05,237
- Come on.
- 906
- 00:44:09,041 --> 00:44:13,746
- Proficiency in sex is a must.
- 907
- 00:44:13,779 --> 00:44:18,751
- It is the universal language
- of humanity.
- 908
- 00:44:20,653 --> 00:44:21,687
- You're tardy.
- 909
- 00:44:21,720 --> 00:44:22,354
- Take a seat.
- 910
- 00:44:22,388 --> 00:44:23,389
- Did you invite her?
- 911
- 00:44:23,422 --> 00:44:25,091
- No.
- 912
- 00:44:25,124 --> 00:44:27,226
- What could she have to learn?
- 913
- 00:44:28,528 --> 00:44:32,865
- <i>To walk around speaking slang
- is to be ignorant to one's self.</i>
- 914
- 00:44:32,898 --> 00:44:33,732
- What're you doing here?
- 915
- 00:44:33,766 --> 00:44:35,301
- I just came here to do research
- for you.
- 916
- 00:44:35,334 --> 00:44:39,071
- Number one miscommunication
- slang speakers make
- 917
- 00:44:39,105 --> 00:44:42,975
- is to think of it as a
- male-centric activity.
- 918
- 00:44:43,008 --> 00:44:44,743
- <i>That is, they think about
- when men intercourse</i>
- 919
- 00:44:44,777 --> 00:44:47,413
- with women that it's
- all about the guy.
- 920
- 00:44:47,447 --> 00:44:48,314
- Wrong!
- 921
- 00:44:48,347 --> 00:44:49,348
- Wrong!!
- 922
- 00:44:49,381 --> 00:44:50,616
- Wrong!
- 923
- 00:44:50,649 --> 00:44:53,953
- From this moment on you will
- refer to sexual communication
- 924
- 00:44:53,986 --> 00:44:59,091
- as the gift that you will
- give to only a worthy man,
- 925
- 00:44:59,125 --> 00:45:05,998
- from you, the soon to be
- supremely empowered woman!
- 926
- 00:45:13,973 --> 00:45:16,308
- Oh, hit-oh wow,
- you are tense.
- 927
- 00:45:16,342 --> 00:45:18,043
- Yeah, I don't think
- smacking it
- 928
- 00:45:18,077 --> 00:45:19,712
- like that is part
- of the technique.
- 929
- 00:45:19,745 --> 00:45:23,782
- Kale, he left me for someone
- his own age so I'm just-
- 930
- 00:45:23,816 --> 00:45:25,784
- I can't deal with men right now.
- 931
- 00:45:25,818 --> 00:45:28,020
- Oh, Nessa, I'm so sorry.
- 932
- 00:45:28,053 --> 00:45:29,989
- Here.
- 933
- 00:45:30,022 --> 00:45:31,423
- I'm gonna help you.
- 934
- 00:45:31,458 --> 00:45:33,259
- Ok?
- 935
- 00:45:33,292 --> 00:45:37,163
- It's like we're in Ghost
- and you're my Patrick Swayze.
- 936
- 00:45:37,196 --> 00:45:41,000
- Oh, of course you get
- to be Demi Moore.
- 937
- 00:45:41,033 --> 00:45:43,068
- It takes a village.
- 938
- 00:46:10,362 --> 00:46:13,232
- Ok, so five weeks until my
- audition for the Philharmonic-
- 939
- 00:46:13,265 --> 00:46:17,269
- I'm not getting any better,
- am I?
- 940
- 00:46:17,303 --> 00:46:19,872
- No, you're really not.
- 941
- 00:46:19,905 --> 00:46:21,006
- What?
- 942
- 00:46:21,040 --> 00:46:22,942
- 'Cause you're already a genius.
- 943
- 00:46:22,975 --> 00:46:24,977
- Well, it's true,
- and you know it.
- 944
- 00:46:25,010 --> 00:46:30,883
- You just gotta get
- out of there.
- 945
- 00:46:30,916 --> 00:46:33,953
- Did you know that the female
- ferret will die if she goes
- 946
- 00:46:33,986 --> 00:46:36,188
- into heat and can't find
- a mate?
- 947
- 00:46:36,222 --> 00:46:38,757
- Jeff was the rodent,
- not you.
- 948
- 00:46:38,791 --> 00:46:39,992
- What about the best man?
- 949
- 00:46:40,025 --> 00:46:40,960
- Groomsman.
- 950
- 00:46:40,993 --> 00:46:42,094
- Hasn't he called?
- 951
- 00:46:42,127 --> 00:46:43,862
- You really should ask Paul
- what his story is because-
- 952
- 00:46:43,896 --> 00:46:46,098
- No. No, he did.
- 953
- 00:46:46,131 --> 00:46:48,133
- We're going out on Saturday.
- 954
- 00:46:48,167 --> 00:46:48,968
- You are?!
- 955
- 00:46:49,001 --> 00:46:49,902
- Oh.
- 956
- 00:46:49,935 --> 00:46:50,402
- That's wonderful!
- 957
- 00:46:50,437 --> 00:46:51,270
- Oh.
- 958
- 00:46:51,303 --> 00:46:53,072
- You're at a ten.
- 959
- 00:46:53,105 --> 00:46:54,306
- Well, what are your plans?
- 960
- 00:46:54,340 --> 00:46:56,809
- I mean, you could do
- a dinner cruise.
- 961
- 00:46:56,842 --> 00:46:58,877
- Oh, a hot air balloon.
- 962
- 00:46:58,911 --> 00:47:00,913
- What is with you today?
- 963
- 00:47:00,946 --> 00:47:02,449
- Nothing, I'm just happy
- for you.
- 964
- 00:47:02,482 --> 00:47:05,351
- Oh... what are those?
- 965
- 00:47:05,384 --> 00:47:07,052
- Stan got me diamonds.
- 966
- 00:47:07,086 --> 00:47:08,354
- Oh my god.
- 967
- 00:47:08,387 --> 00:47:10,089
- Was it the seminar?
- 968
- 00:47:10,122 --> 00:47:13,125
- I have a sex life again
- after 27 years.
- 969
- 00:47:13,158 --> 00:47:16,262
- Stan and I are doing it like
- high school kids on prom night.
- 970
- 00:47:16,295 --> 00:47:18,797
- Oh, so meaning it's over
- in five minutes
- 971
- 00:47:18,831 --> 00:47:19,965
- and you get nothing out of it.
- 972
- 00:47:19,999 --> 00:47:22,968
- Except a bad reputation.
- 973
- 00:47:23,002 --> 00:47:24,403
- Anyway, enough about me.
- 974
- 00:47:24,437 --> 00:47:26,071
- Why aren't you thrilled
- about the best man?
- 975
- 00:47:26,105 --> 00:47:27,206
- I am.
- 976
- 00:47:27,239 --> 00:47:30,976
- I... don't you think he's
- a little out of my league?
- 977
- 00:47:31,010 --> 00:47:33,245
- I'm not even gonna dignify
- that question.
- 978
- 00:47:33,279 --> 00:47:35,881
- You're just afraid to get back
- on the horse.
- 979
- 00:47:35,914 --> 00:47:37,816
- Lucy, it's like riding a bike.
- 980
- 00:47:37,850 --> 00:47:41,387
- Or maybe a pogo stick.
- 981
- 00:47:41,420 --> 00:47:43,556
- I'm just freaking out
- because in my effort to be
- 982
- 00:47:43,590 --> 00:47:47,594
- supremely empowered I insisted
- on planning the date.
- 983
- 00:47:47,627 --> 00:47:50,896
- And I've got nothing.
- 984
- 00:47:50,929 --> 00:47:54,099
- Well, if you're interested,
- Stan got us two tickets
- 985
- 00:47:54,133 --> 00:47:56,603
- to the Dr. Becker taping
- on Saturday night.
- 986
- 00:47:56,636 --> 00:47:57,936
- VIP seats.
- 987
- 00:47:57,970 --> 00:47:59,271
- Which is...?
- 988
- 00:47:59,305 --> 00:48:01,441
- She's a sex expert.
- 989
- 00:48:01,474 --> 00:48:03,275
- I showed Stan the list.
- 990
- 00:48:03,309 --> 00:48:05,077
- He got very inspired.
- 991
- 00:48:05,110 --> 00:48:07,313
- Anyway, if I promised to make it
- worth his while
- 992
- 00:48:07,346 --> 00:48:11,016
- I'm sure I can get him
- to stay at home.
- 993
- 00:48:11,050 --> 00:48:15,054
- Ok, if I promise to take
- the tickets
- 994
- 00:48:15,087 --> 00:48:16,855
- do you promise to never talk
- about you and Stan
- 995
- 00:48:16,889 --> 00:48:19,526
- sexually communicating
- ever again?
- 996
- 00:48:19,559 --> 00:48:20,259
- Deal.
- 997
- 00:48:20,292 --> 00:48:21,193
- Ok.
- 998
- 00:48:21,226 --> 00:48:22,328
- Can I just tell you one thing?
- 999
- 00:48:22,361 --> 00:48:23,128
- Alright, yes.
- 1000
- 00:48:23,162 --> 00:48:24,897
- I'm gonna get my labia
- tightened.
- 1001
- 00:48:33,038 --> 00:48:35,874
- What do you think about
- oyster shooters?
- 1002
- 00:48:35,908 --> 00:48:40,946
- Mmm, aren't oysters more
- of a third date kind of food?
- 1003
- 00:48:40,979 --> 00:48:43,282
- Yes, good point.
- 1004
- 00:48:43,315 --> 00:48:45,084
- It's not like you're taking me
- to a sex show.
- 1005
- 00:48:45,117 --> 00:48:47,886
- Lecture by a progressive,
- 1006
- 00:48:47,920 --> 00:48:50,523
- world renowned researcher
- who went to Yale.
- 1007
- 00:48:50,557 --> 00:48:54,093
- Which is definitely
- not Harvard.
- 1008
- 00:48:54,126 --> 00:48:56,228
- But she happens to be discussing
- human sexuality and I-
- 1009
- 00:48:56,261 --> 00:48:59,131
- I know, I know, consult
- an expert is on your list.
- 1010
- 00:48:59,164 --> 00:49:00,933
- I'm messing with you.
- 1011
- 00:49:00,966 --> 00:49:04,169
- And just because we're going
- to a lecture like this
- 1012
- 00:49:04,203 --> 00:49:07,206
- doesn't make me a sure thing,
- you know.
- 1013
- 00:49:07,239 --> 00:49:08,675
- Me neither.
- 1014
- 00:49:08,708 --> 00:49:10,309
- Good.
- 1015
- 00:49:10,342 --> 00:49:13,613
- Wouldn't want you getting
- the wrong idea.
- 1016
- 00:49:13,646 --> 00:49:16,415
- What idea might that be?
- 1017
- 00:49:16,449 --> 00:49:19,385
- I don't know, I just wouldn't
- want you misinterpreting
- 1018
- 00:49:19,418 --> 00:49:25,658
- my list, 'cause I'm really
- not that kind of girl.
- 1019
- 00:49:25,692 --> 00:49:29,128
- And what kind of girl
- are you?
- 1020
- 00:49:29,161 --> 00:49:33,265
- That's for me to know
- and for you to wonder.
- 1021
- 00:49:36,503 --> 00:49:38,605
- Ok, well now I'm gonna ask you
- a bunch of things
- 1022
- 00:49:38,638 --> 00:49:41,173
- so I can make a meaningful
- snap judgement about you
- 1023
- 00:49:41,206 --> 00:49:42,174
- without being distracted
- 1024
- 00:49:42,207 --> 00:49:46,345
- by all your charming,
- attractive... you-ness.
- 1025
- 00:49:46,378 --> 00:49:48,947
- Is this where you ask me
- for my tax return?
- 1026
- 00:49:48,981 --> 00:49:50,450
- 'Cause I didn't bring it.
- 1027
- 00:49:50,483 --> 00:49:52,685
- Uh, no.
- 1028
- 00:49:52,719 --> 00:49:55,455
- I was just gonna ask you what
- your favourite book was.
- 1029
- 00:49:55,488 --> 00:49:57,055
- Um, sorry.
- 1030
- 00:49:57,089 --> 00:49:59,258
- My last girlfriend did that
- on the first date.
- 1031
- 00:49:59,291 --> 00:50:03,128
- And you still ended up
- dating her?
- 1032
- 00:50:03,162 --> 00:50:04,664
- Oh.
- 1033
- 00:50:04,697 --> 00:50:05,732
- Alright, yeah.
- 1034
- 00:50:05,765 --> 00:50:08,300
- Your last girlfriend must have
- been a supermodel.
- 1035
- 00:50:08,333 --> 00:50:10,637
- She was a model, yes,
- but super, no.
- 1036
- 00:50:10,670 --> 00:50:11,571
- Definitely not.
- 1037
- 00:50:11,604 --> 00:50:13,138
- And she's certainly not
- Harvard material.
- 1038
- 00:50:13,172 --> 00:50:15,040
- Ah.
- 1039
- 00:50:15,073 --> 00:50:19,178
- Well, as an artist, I do not
- require financial documentation.
- 1040
- 00:50:19,211 --> 00:50:21,113
- Being well kept doesn't really
- apply to me.
- 1041
- 00:50:21,146 --> 00:50:24,049
- And yet you seem to be
- kept very well.
- 1042
- 00:50:26,519 --> 00:50:27,454
- That is corny.
- 1043
- 00:50:29,154 --> 00:50:30,989
- Uh, let's do the books.
- 1044
- 00:50:31,023 --> 00:50:32,024
- I have two.
- 1045
- 00:50:32,057 --> 00:50:33,058
- I also have two favourites.
- 1046
- 00:50:33,091 --> 00:50:33,760
- Ladies first.
- 1047
- 00:50:33,793 --> 00:50:34,661
- Nope.
- 1048
- 00:50:34,694 --> 00:50:35,227
- Huh?
- 1049
- 00:50:35,260 --> 00:50:37,095
- No. I asked you first.
- 1050
- 00:50:37,129 --> 00:50:39,164
- Revealing book love is
- a very personal thing.
- 1051
- 00:50:39,198 --> 00:50:40,165
- I know.
- 1052
- 00:50:40,199 --> 00:50:44,002
- That's why it's my stock first
- date question.
- 1053
- 00:50:44,036 --> 00:50:47,172
- It's gonna tell me everything
- I need to know about you.
- 1054
- 00:50:47,206 --> 00:50:49,642
- Are you sure you wanna know?
- 1055
- 00:50:49,676 --> 00:50:51,611
- Yeah, you're right.
- 1056
- 00:50:51,644 --> 00:50:54,379
- It could be the end of something
- good before it even starts.
- 1057
- 00:50:54,413 --> 00:50:57,617
- Or it could be the start of
- something good that doesn't end.
- 1058
- 00:50:59,586 --> 00:51:01,253
- What the hell's
- in this drink?
- 1059
- 00:51:03,656 --> 00:51:04,657
- Ok, alright.
- 1060
- 00:51:04,691 --> 00:51:06,325
- Let's just state our books.
- 1061
- 00:51:06,358 --> 00:51:07,192
- Yep.
- 1062
- 00:51:07,226 --> 00:51:09,061
- And let's get this ship
- to sinking, ok?
- 1063
- 00:51:09,094 --> 00:51:10,162
- Please.
- 1064
- 00:51:10,195 --> 00:51:11,029
- Alright.
- 1065
- 00:51:11,063 --> 00:51:12,030
- Yeah. At the same time,
- count of three?
- 1066
- 00:51:12,064 --> 00:51:12,465
- Yes.
- 1067
- 00:51:12,499 --> 00:51:13,098
- Alright.
- 1068
- 00:51:13,131 --> 00:51:13,666
- Ok.
- 1069
- 00:51:13,700 --> 00:51:15,502
- One, two, three.
- 1070
- 00:51:15,535 --> 00:51:16,569
- "Everything That Rises
- Must Converge",
- 1071
- 00:51:16,603 --> 00:51:17,804
- and "The Story of Your Life."
- 1072
- 00:51:17,837 --> 00:51:18,738
- "The Story of Your Life"
- 1073
- 00:51:18,771 --> 00:51:21,373
- and "Everything That Rises
- Must Converge".
- 1074
- 00:51:22,241 --> 00:51:24,042
- Well, you like them in
- the wrong order.
- 1075
- 00:51:24,076 --> 00:51:26,044
- Yeah. It's definitely
- not gonna work.
- 1076
- 00:51:36,723 --> 00:51:38,591
- This is the Dr. Becker show?
- 1077
- 00:51:38,625 --> 00:51:40,158
- Yeah. Hi, welcome.
- 1078
- 00:51:40,192 --> 00:51:41,326
- Hi.
- 1079
- 00:51:41,360 --> 00:51:45,698
- Oh, uh, will Dr. Becker
- be out soon?
- 1080
- 00:51:45,732 --> 00:51:48,200
- That is Dr. Becker.
- 1081
- 00:51:48,233 --> 00:51:49,067
- Alright, let's get everybody
- in their seats now-
- 1082
- 00:51:49,101 --> 00:51:53,205
- Wait, she's a Magna Cum
- Laude Yale PhD?
- 1083
- 00:51:53,238 --> 00:51:54,607
- Follow me.
- 1084
- 00:51:54,641 --> 00:51:56,709
- Alright, ladies and gentlemen,
- please take your seats.
- 1085
- 00:51:56,743 --> 00:51:58,778
- The show is about to start.
- 1086
- 00:51:58,811 --> 00:52:03,248
- Dr. Becker, you're on
- in three, two...
- 1087
- 00:52:05,117 --> 00:52:07,119
- Ok.
- 1088
- 00:52:07,152 --> 00:52:09,221
- I am so sorry.
- I had no idea-
- 1089
- 00:52:09,254 --> 00:52:10,322
- Are you kidding me?
- 1090
- 00:52:10,355 --> 00:52:13,593
- This is the most interesting
- date I have ever gone on
- 1091
- 00:52:13,626 --> 00:52:14,627
- in my entire life.
- 1092
- 00:52:14,661 --> 00:52:15,628
- Welcome.
- 1093
- 00:52:15,662 --> 00:52:20,165
- Tonight's guest is both
- a true pleasure to have
- 1094
- 00:52:20,198 --> 00:52:23,469
- and a departure from my usual
- science-based approach
- 1095
- 00:52:23,503 --> 00:52:25,805
- to sexual enlightenment.
- 1096
- 00:52:25,838 --> 00:52:28,608
- Science was nothing like
- this where I went to school.
- 1097
- 00:52:28,641 --> 00:52:29,876
- Really?
- 1098
- 00:52:29,909 --> 00:52:32,144
- I thought boarding schools were
- known for sexual enlightenment.
- 1099
- 00:52:32,177 --> 00:52:35,113
- <i>Please help me welcome
- Madam Swarovska,</i>
- 1100
- 00:52:35,147 --> 00:52:37,249
- world-renowned sexual psychic.
- 1101
- 00:52:39,151 --> 00:52:40,053
- What's a sexual psychic?
- 1102
- 00:52:40,085 --> 00:52:42,354
- Someone who can do
- the pull and pray method
- 1103
- 00:52:42,387 --> 00:52:44,256
- of birth control?
- 1104
- 00:52:45,658 --> 00:52:46,659
- You snorted.
- 1105
- 00:52:46,693 --> 00:52:47,894
- Ok, I'm leaving.
- 1106
- 00:52:47,927 --> 00:52:49,862
- That one.
- 1107
- 00:52:49,896 --> 00:52:51,330
- She suffers.
- 1108
- 00:52:51,363 --> 00:52:52,364
- Oh?
- 1109
- 00:52:57,169 --> 00:52:58,403
- Oh.
- 1110
- 00:52:58,438 --> 00:52:59,672
- Madame Swarovska,
- 1111
- 00:52:59,706 --> 00:53:02,341
- can you explain to our audience
- what it is that you're doing?
- 1112
- 00:53:02,374 --> 00:53:03,910
- And me, would be nice.
- 1113
- 00:53:03,943 --> 00:53:07,379
- I am assessing the aura.
- 1114
- 00:53:07,412 --> 00:53:11,183
- Seeing what colours
- surround her.
- 1115
- 00:53:11,216 --> 00:53:13,318
- Sounds lovely.
- Thank you.
- 1116
- 00:53:13,352 --> 00:53:16,623
- For most people, yes.
- For you, no.
- 1117
- 00:53:16,656 --> 00:53:19,391
- For you, is grey.
- 1118
- 00:53:19,424 --> 00:53:20,793
- Grey?
- 1119
- 00:53:20,827 --> 00:53:22,895
- Are you saying that
- she's sexually...
- 1120
- 00:53:22,929 --> 00:53:24,196
- Grey!
- 1121
- 00:53:24,229 --> 00:53:25,665
- Yes.
- 1122
- 00:53:25,698 --> 00:53:30,168
- Well, lucky for me
- neutrals are in for fall.
- 1123
- 00:53:30,202 --> 00:53:32,170
- You know, we can go
- like five minutes ago.
- 1124
- 00:53:32,204 --> 00:53:33,205
- No, no, this is awesome.
- 1125
- 00:53:33,238 --> 00:53:34,073
- This is great.
- 1126
- 00:53:34,107 --> 00:53:36,208
- How about we get you on
- stage, Miss...?
- 1127
- 00:53:36,241 --> 00:53:37,644
- Uh, Lu...
- 1128
- 00:53:38,945 --> 00:53:40,480
- Lulu-bell.
- 1129
- 00:53:41,514 --> 00:53:43,950
- <i>Well, come on up
- here, Lulu-bell,</i>
- 1130
- 00:53:43,983 --> 00:53:46,653
- so Madame Swarovska
- can read you.
- 1131
- 00:53:46,686 --> 00:53:47,920
- Come on.
- 1132
- 00:53:48,921 --> 00:53:50,590
- You're safe.
- 1133
- 00:53:53,960 --> 00:53:59,732
- Yes, the grey one is in deep
- struggle with the sex.
- 1134
- 00:53:59,766 --> 00:54:01,333
- I often discuss a condition
- 1135
- 00:54:01,366 --> 00:54:04,202
- called sexual attention
- deficit disorder.
- 1136
- 00:54:04,236 --> 00:54:05,538
- SADD.
- 1137
- 00:54:05,571 --> 00:54:07,507
- Sad, for short.
- 1138
- 00:54:07,540 --> 00:54:09,742
- Which involves frequent
- mental wanderings
- 1139
- 00:54:09,776 --> 00:54:13,311
- of a non-sexual nature
- during intercourse.
- 1140
- 00:54:13,345 --> 00:54:14,480
- Might that be what-
- 1141
- 00:54:14,514 --> 00:54:17,917
- Yes, but also lack
- of experience.
- 1142
- 00:54:19,485 --> 00:54:24,791
- Oh, trust me, I-I have plenty
- of experience.
- 1143
- 00:54:27,493 --> 00:54:29,394
- The cards say no.
- 1144
- 00:54:29,429 --> 00:54:30,697
- No, I assure you.
- 1145
- 00:54:30,730 --> 00:54:32,397
- I know what I'm doing.
- 1146
- 00:54:32,432 --> 00:54:33,933
- The cards say no.
- 1147
- 00:54:37,302 --> 00:54:38,838
- Oh, I see.
- 1148
- 00:54:38,871 --> 00:54:42,909
- You are very old when
- you are first having sex.
- 1149
- 00:54:42,942 --> 00:54:44,877
- Surely you mean old enough.
- 1150
- 00:54:44,911 --> 00:54:46,879
- No, I mean old.
- 1151
- 00:54:46,913 --> 00:54:48,548
- Oh.
- 1152
- 00:54:49,247 --> 00:54:53,453
- Oh, old is why you are only
- having sex with four people?
- 1153
- 00:54:53,486 --> 00:54:55,287
- Is that true?
- 1154
- 00:54:55,320 --> 00:54:56,723
- Four?
- 1155
- 00:54:56,756 --> 00:54:57,657
- No.
- 1156
- 00:54:57,690 --> 00:54:58,491
- No?
- 1157
- 00:54:58,524 --> 00:54:59,158
- Well, yeah.
- 1158
- 00:54:59,192 --> 00:55:00,526
- But what's wrong with that?
- 1159
- 00:55:00,560 --> 00:55:02,862
- Oh, one does not count.
- 1160
- 00:55:02,895 --> 00:55:09,902
- It ends uh, how you say...
- prematurely.
- 1161
- 00:55:13,906 --> 00:55:15,975
- Oh, that one looks promising.
- 1162
- 00:55:16,008 --> 00:55:19,979
- Yeah, when is upright yes,
- but for you is reverse.
- 1163
- 00:55:20,012 --> 00:55:20,813
- Oh.
- 1164
- 00:55:20,847 --> 00:55:22,915
- Oh.
- 1165
- 00:55:22,949 --> 00:55:24,282
- Grey one.
- 1166
- 00:55:24,316 --> 00:55:25,084
- Yeah?
- 1167
- 00:55:25,118 --> 00:55:27,385
- You're not having
- the big booms?
- 1168
- 00:55:27,419 --> 00:55:29,722
- What?
- 1169
- 00:55:29,756 --> 00:55:32,558
- The big booms.
- 1170
- 00:55:32,592 --> 00:55:34,994
- The rolling thunder.
- 1171
- 00:55:35,027 --> 00:55:37,530
- The crotch magic,
- you know?
- 1172
- 00:55:37,563 --> 00:55:39,565
- Like, oh yeah, baby.
- 1173
- 00:55:39,599 --> 00:55:40,398
- I love it!
- 1174
- 00:55:40,433 --> 00:55:41,266
- You know?
- 1175
- 00:55:41,299 --> 00:55:42,969
- Like, woah Nealy gets
- really crazy,
- 1176
- 00:55:43,002 --> 00:55:44,369
- that kind of sex.
- 1177
- 00:55:44,402 --> 00:55:46,973
- Like uh, like magic time.
- 1178
- 00:55:47,006 --> 00:55:48,306
- Like crotch magic.
- 1179
- 00:55:48,340 --> 00:55:49,809
- Blast it off.
- 1180
- 00:55:49,842 --> 00:55:51,644
- Blast up inside, you know?
- 1181
- 00:55:51,677 --> 00:55:53,045
- I can't handle it anymore!
- 1182
- 00:55:53,079 --> 00:55:54,680
- Like... woo!
- 1183
- 00:55:54,714 --> 00:55:55,681
- This type of thing.
- 1184
- 00:55:55,715 --> 00:55:56,916
- What-how you call it?
- 1185
- 00:55:56,949 --> 00:56:00,953
- She sees... um,
- you don't orgasm.
- 1186
- 00:56:00,987 --> 00:56:02,889
- I got it. Thanks.
- 1187
- 00:56:02,922 --> 00:56:05,958
- Oh, but you're giving booms
- to yourself sometime,
- 1188
- 00:56:05,992 --> 00:56:06,926
- that's good.
- 1189
- 00:56:06,959 --> 00:56:08,060
- That's ok.
- 1190
- 00:56:08,094 --> 00:56:09,028
- That's something, huh?
- 1191
- 00:56:12,364 --> 00:56:12,999
- That's nice.
- 1192
- 00:56:13,032 --> 00:56:14,934
- You keep that going, ok?
- 1193
- 00:56:15,701 --> 00:56:18,805
- Now I'm going to see about
- the one you come here with.
- 1194
- 00:56:18,838 --> 00:56:19,672
- This guy over here.
- 1195
- 00:56:19,705 --> 00:56:20,540
- Oh, oh.
- 1196
- 00:56:20,573 --> 00:56:21,941
- Hey, now.
- 1197
- 00:56:27,613 --> 00:56:28,548
- This is really lucky.
- 1198
- 00:56:28,581 --> 00:56:30,917
- The devil's card in reverse
- is representing
- 1199
- 00:56:30,950 --> 00:56:33,920
- like breaking freedom
- from restraint.
- 1200
- 00:56:33,953 --> 00:56:37,690
- This guy is going to give
- you the big booms!
- 1201
- 00:56:39,091 --> 00:56:40,459
- Yes.
- 1202
- 00:56:41,961 --> 00:56:45,965
- Isn't that amazing how accurate
- the Madame is?
- 1203
- 00:56:59,111 --> 00:57:04,450
- Well uh, thank you again
- for a uh, revealing night.
- 1204
- 00:57:04,483 --> 00:57:08,754
- Once again, she was so not right
- about anything she said.
- 1205
- 00:57:08,788 --> 00:57:09,455
- No.
- 1206
- 00:57:09,488 --> 00:57:09,956
- By the way.
- 1207
- 00:57:09,989 --> 00:57:11,057
- She's crazy.
- 1208
- 00:57:11,090 --> 00:57:12,859
- She said I rocked your world
- when we barely even know
- 1209
- 00:57:12,892 --> 00:57:14,927
- each other, let alone have had,
- you know, sex.
- 1210
- 00:57:14,961 --> 00:57:16,062
- Right?
- 1211
- 00:57:16,095 --> 00:57:16,996
- I know.
- 1212
- 00:57:17,029 --> 00:57:18,264
- Like, what was she even saying?
- 1213
- 00:57:18,297 --> 00:57:23,669
- That just me being close to you
- I get like all... I don't know.
- 1214
- 00:57:23,703 --> 00:57:24,503
- Sorry, no.
- 1215
- 00:57:24,537 --> 00:57:28,174
- Look how in control I am
- around you.
- 1216
- 00:57:28,207 --> 00:57:30,142
- Right.
- 1217
- 00:57:31,177 --> 00:57:32,812
- Anyway, yeah, she was wrong.
- 1218
- 00:57:32,845 --> 00:57:34,747
- She was crazy wrong.
- 1219
- 00:57:35,081 --> 00:57:36,849
- Who knows?
- 1220
- 00:57:39,919 --> 00:57:42,989
- Anyway, twice again,
- for the official record,
- 1221
- 00:57:43,022 --> 00:57:45,825
- I had absolutely no idea
- about tonight
- 1222
- 00:57:45,858 --> 00:57:49,629
- and I am so, so, so sorry.
- 1223
- 00:57:49,662 --> 00:57:51,130
- I'm really sorry.
- 1224
- 00:57:51,163 --> 00:57:53,132
- I'm not.
- 1225
- 00:58:00,606 --> 00:58:01,474
- Goodnight.
- 1226
- 00:58:01,507 --> 00:58:02,842
- Yeah.
- 1227
- 00:58:02,875 --> 00:58:04,477
- I swear you're going
- to get me fired.
- 1228
- 00:58:04,510 --> 00:58:07,013
- Or even worse,
- assigned to awful jobs.
- 1229
- 00:58:07,046 --> 00:58:09,916
- Grant's a pretty big deal
- at the firm, you know.
- 1230
- 00:58:09,949 --> 00:58:13,085
- And you're a big deal to us,
- Paul, but this isn't about you.
- 1231
- 00:58:13,119 --> 00:58:14,620
- Yet.
- 1232
- 00:58:14,654 --> 00:58:16,923
- The psychic didn't
- say anything positive?
- 1233
- 00:58:16,956 --> 00:58:18,758
- Just that I wouldn't end
- up alone.
- 1234
- 00:58:18,791 --> 00:58:21,594
- Well, that could just mean
- she thinks you'll get a cat.
- 1235
- 00:58:21,627 --> 00:58:22,395
- What?
- 1236
- 00:58:22,428 --> 00:58:23,663
- Ok, let me paint a picture
- for you.
- 1237
- 00:58:23,696 --> 00:58:28,000
- If Grant is the devil and not
- even he can get lucky with her,
- 1238
- 00:58:28,034 --> 00:58:30,703
- then perhaps poor Luce
- is destined to end up
- 1239
- 00:58:30,736 --> 00:58:33,172
- with a litter of cats.
- 1240
- 00:58:33,205 --> 00:58:34,774
- But seriously,
- let's get back on point.
- 1241
- 00:58:34,807 --> 00:58:36,042
- How did you two leave things?
- 1242
- 00:58:36,075 --> 00:58:37,777
- Am I gonna have to avoid him
- at the office?
- 1243
- 00:58:37,810 --> 00:58:40,947
- Can't hear you.
- I'm shopping.
- 1244
- 00:58:40,980 --> 00:58:43,549
- Luce, quick question.
- 1245
- 00:58:43,582 --> 00:58:45,785
- Isn't this the section for girls
- who do get kissed?
- 1246
- 00:58:45,818 --> 00:58:46,585
- Hey.
- 1247
- 00:58:46,619 --> 00:58:47,720
- Just so you know,
- 1248
- 00:58:47,753 --> 00:58:49,055
- he said he was gonna call this
- weekend to make plans.
- 1249
- 00:58:49,088 --> 00:58:50,056
- And no, I'm in
- the right section.
- 1250
- 00:58:50,089 --> 00:58:50,890
- Mmmhmm.
- 1251
- 00:58:50,923 --> 00:58:54,193
- Guys, I have to tell
- you something.
- 1252
- 00:58:54,226 --> 00:58:56,262
- Good god, you're not preg-
- how?
- 1253
- 00:58:56,295 --> 00:58:57,096
- What?
- 1254
- 00:58:57,129 --> 00:58:57,730
- No.
- 1255
- 00:58:57,763 --> 00:58:58,965
- The question would be who,
- 1256
- 00:58:58,998 --> 00:59:01,934
- since I can't even seem to get
- a guy past the front porch.
- 1257
- 00:59:01,968 --> 00:59:02,935
- You know those jeans
- 1258
- 00:59:02,969 --> 00:59:06,672
- that make my ass look like
- a sorority girl's?
- 1259
- 00:59:08,307 --> 00:59:09,809
- Here?
- 1260
- 00:59:09,842 --> 00:59:10,910
- We're going to
- the women's section.
- 1261
- 00:59:10,943 --> 00:59:12,278
- Nope, not the women's.
- 1262
- 00:59:12,311 --> 00:59:13,145
- Men's?
- 1263
- 00:59:13,179 --> 00:59:14,013
- That's brilliant.
- 1264
- 00:59:14,046 --> 00:59:15,014
- Right here.
- 1265
- 00:59:15,047 --> 00:59:16,849
- In maternity.
- 1266
- 00:59:17,516 --> 00:59:22,088
- Look, they have this stretchy
- stuff that goes over the stomach
- 1267
- 00:59:22,121 --> 00:59:25,791
- and just kinda smooths
- everything out.
- 1268
- 00:59:28,260 --> 00:59:30,229
- I know, you think
- I'm pathetic.
- 1269
- 00:59:30,262 --> 00:59:31,330
- No, no.
- 1270
- 00:59:31,364 --> 00:59:33,733
- I'm just trying to figure out
- my size in women's.
- 1271
- 00:59:49,682 --> 00:59:52,618
- Who knew strings could accompany
- threesome-type sex so well?
- 1272
- 00:59:52,651 --> 00:59:54,120
- I say we rehearse like this
- all the time.
- 1273
- 00:59:55,154 --> 00:59:57,089
- I'm so surprised you're still
- doing the list.
- 1274
- 00:59:57,123 --> 00:59:58,157
- I'm psyched.
- 1275
- 00:59:58,190 --> 01:00:00,860
- I've been labelled
- sexually grey.
- 1276
- 01:00:00,893 --> 01:00:02,328
- It kinda solidified the mission.
- 1277
- 01:00:02,361 --> 01:00:04,263
- And I've been waiting for Grant
- to call me all week
- 1278
- 01:00:04,296 --> 01:00:07,800
- so I figured I might as well
- just watch my 25 films.
- 1279
- 01:00:07,833 --> 01:00:09,035
- Why are you waiting
- for him to call?
- 1280
- 01:00:09,068 --> 01:00:12,671
- Why don't you call him?
- 1281
- 01:00:12,705 --> 01:00:14,807
- Anyway, so I had one of these
- on when it came time
- 1282
- 01:00:14,840 --> 01:00:16,942
- to practise one day, so...
- 1283
- 01:00:16,976 --> 01:00:17,877
- Well, if it means anything,
- 1284
- 01:00:17,910 --> 01:00:20,146
- I've never heard you play
- this good, girl.
- 1285
- 01:00:20,179 --> 01:00:21,380
- Don't be ridiculous.
- 1286
- 01:00:21,414 --> 01:00:25,618
- A month until the Philharmonic
- auditions remember us when.
- 1287
- 01:00:25,651 --> 01:00:26,652
- Mmmhmm.
- 1288
- 01:00:32,691 --> 01:00:34,627
- Oh my god.
- It's him.
- 1289
- 01:00:34,660 --> 01:00:35,094
- The best man?
- 1290
- 01:00:35,127 --> 01:00:36,162
- <i>Yeah.</i>
- 1291
- 01:00:36,195 --> 01:00:37,129
- Do I-what,
- do I answer?
- 1292
- 01:00:37,163 --> 01:00:37,763
- No!
- 1293
- 01:00:37,797 --> 01:00:39,665
- No.
- 1294
- 01:00:39,698 --> 01:00:41,000
- Yes.
- 1295
- 01:00:41,033 --> 01:00:42,802
- I don't know.
- 1296
- 01:00:42,835 --> 01:00:44,136
- Ok, answer it or I will.
- 1297
- 01:00:44,170 --> 01:00:45,971
- I already suffered through
- high school once.
- 1298
- 01:00:46,005 --> 01:00:47,006
- Ok.
- 1299
- 01:00:47,740 --> 01:00:48,874
- Ok.
- 1300
- 01:00:50,209 --> 01:00:51,243
- Hey.
- 1301
- 01:00:51,277 --> 01:00:52,745
- <i>Hey yourself.
- It's Grant.</i>
- 1302
- 01:00:52,778 --> 01:00:54,280
- <i>Listen, sorry I haven't
- called you...</i>
- 1303
- 01:00:54,313 --> 01:00:56,148
- "Hey"? The man of your dreams
- calls and you say "hey"?
- 1304
- 01:00:56,182 --> 01:00:57,783
- Shh!
- 1305
- 01:00:57,817 --> 01:00:59,652
- Uh, me shush?
- 1306
- 01:00:59,685 --> 01:01:01,053
- No, sorry.
- Not you.
- 1307
- 01:01:01,087 --> 01:01:02,121
- I'm with the quartet.
- 1308
- 01:01:02,154 --> 01:01:03,856
- Rehearsing some porn!
- 1309
- 01:01:04,924 --> 01:01:05,991
- Did she say you're
- watching porn?
- 1310
- 01:01:06,025 --> 01:01:06,692
- <i>No.</i>
- 1311
- 01:01:06,725 --> 01:01:07,326
- <i>No, she did not.</i>
- 1312
- 01:01:07,359 --> 01:01:09,161
- She said "horn".
- 1313
- 01:01:09,195 --> 01:01:11,897
- Yeah, we're adding a French horn
- to the group.
- 1314
- 01:01:11,931 --> 01:01:14,100
- Ah, well, I can't help you
- with that.
- 1315
- 01:01:14,133 --> 01:01:17,336
- So um, you're working
- on a Saturday?
- 1316
- 01:01:17,369 --> 01:01:18,204
- <i>Uh, listen.</i>
- 1317
- 01:01:18,237 --> 01:01:19,338
- <i>Sorry I haven't called
- all week.</i>
- 1318
- 01:01:19,371 --> 01:01:20,940
- <i>I've been bloody busy
- in non-stop meetings and-</i>
- 1319
- 01:01:20,973 --> 01:01:22,041
- He was out
- of town all week.
- 1320
- 01:01:22,074 --> 01:01:23,042
- That's it.
- 1321
- 01:01:23,075 --> 01:01:23,943
- Woohoo!
- 1322
- 01:01:23,976 --> 01:01:25,344
- Oh, thank god.
- 1323
- 01:01:25,377 --> 01:01:26,679
- There it is.
- 1324
- 01:01:27,079 --> 01:01:28,013
- Oh!
- 1325
- 01:01:29,449 --> 01:01:30,216
- Oh, Paul, your ass.
- 1326
- 01:01:30,249 --> 01:01:31,083
- Turn it down!
- 1327
- 01:01:31,117 --> 01:01:33,018
- <i>Turn it down!</i>
- 1328
- 01:01:34,153 --> 01:01:36,088
- Sorry, Nessa just stubbed
- her toe.
- 1329
- 01:01:36,122 --> 01:01:37,022
- Why me?
- 1330
- 01:01:39,158 --> 01:01:40,092
- Anyway, look.
- 1331
- 01:01:40,126 --> 01:01:41,760
- I know it's last minute
- but I was thinking,
- 1332
- 01:01:41,794 --> 01:01:43,095
- if you wanted to go out-
- 1333
- 01:01:43,129 --> 01:01:44,029
- <i>I'd love to.</i>
- 1334
- 01:01:44,063 --> 01:01:46,065
- Yes. Whatever it is.
- 1335
- 01:01:46,098 --> 01:01:46,966
- So sorry!
- 1336
- 01:01:48,200 --> 01:01:50,069
- Not sorry.
- 1337
- 01:02:30,209 --> 01:02:31,210
- Ok. Ok.
- 1338
- 01:02:31,243 --> 01:02:32,278
- Here we go.
- 1339
- 01:02:32,311 --> 01:02:33,846
- Wait. Wait.
- 1340
- 01:02:33,879 --> 01:02:35,080
- What?
- 1341
- 01:02:49,061 --> 01:02:49,496
- Mmm-mmm.
- 1342
- 01:02:49,529 --> 01:02:50,029
- No?
- 1343
- 01:02:50,062 --> 01:02:50,996
- You want me to stop?
- 1344
- 01:02:51,030 --> 01:02:52,432
- What? No. Go.
- 1345
- 01:02:52,465 --> 01:02:52,965
- No?
- 1346
- 01:02:52,998 --> 01:02:55,468
- As in it's a no go?
- 1347
- 01:02:55,502 --> 01:02:56,802
- No. No. Keep going.
- 1348
- 01:03:42,314 --> 01:03:44,451
- The perfect pants
- for you two.
- 1349
- 01:03:57,930 --> 01:03:59,064
- Hi.
- 1350
- 01:03:59,098 --> 01:03:59,865
- Hey.
- 1351
- 01:03:59,898 --> 01:04:01,133
- Sorry, I didn't mean
- to wake you.
- 1352
- 01:04:01,166 --> 01:04:03,135
- Um, I was just gonna...
- 1353
- 01:04:04,169 --> 01:04:06,105
- Oh.
- 1354
- 01:04:06,138 --> 01:04:06,939
- Ok.
- 1355
- 01:04:16,849 --> 01:04:18,017
- I'll call you.
- 1356
- 01:04:18,951 --> 01:04:20,185
- Yeah.
- 1357
- 01:04:34,534 --> 01:04:35,134
- Oh my god.
- 1358
- 01:04:35,167 --> 01:04:36,168
- No! No!
- 1359
- 01:04:36,201 --> 01:04:39,004
- Grant! Wait!
- 1360
- 01:04:39,038 --> 01:04:40,072
- Shit.
- 1361
- 01:04:41,106 --> 01:04:41,907
- No. No.
- 1362
- 01:04:41,940 --> 01:04:43,409
- Grant! Wait!
- 1363
- 01:04:44,176 --> 01:04:47,212
- Grant? Grant!
- 1364
- 01:04:47,246 --> 01:04:50,949
- If it's about the porn
- I can quit any time!
- 1365
- 01:04:53,385 --> 01:04:54,186
- What?
- 1366
- 01:04:54,219 --> 01:04:57,122
- So I watch porn.
- Big fucking deal.
- 1367
- 01:04:57,156 --> 01:04:58,424
- As long as it's consensual.
- 1368
- 01:04:58,458 --> 01:05:00,326
- No judgement.
- 1369
- 01:05:12,237 --> 01:05:14,106
- Stupid.
- 1370
- 01:05:14,139 --> 01:05:16,141
- Useless!
- 1371
- 01:05:17,677 --> 01:05:20,412
- This tastes like crap!
- 1372
- 01:05:22,147 --> 01:05:23,215
- Disgusting!
- 1373
- 01:05:23,248 --> 01:05:24,416
- Ugh!
- 1374
- 01:05:24,451 --> 01:05:25,618
- Don't even work!
- 1375
- 01:05:27,052 --> 01:05:28,455
- Ugh!
- 1376
- 01:05:33,392 --> 01:05:35,294
- God, I can't believe this.
- 1377
- 01:05:36,028 --> 01:05:37,162
- And you.
- 1378
- 01:06:38,056 --> 01:06:39,626
- Stupid.
- 1379
- 01:06:59,512 --> 01:07:02,615
- Ugh, Phil's penthouse
- is just so gorge.
- 1380
- 01:07:02,649 --> 01:07:05,117
- My boyfriend and I walked in
- and he was all
- 1381
- 01:07:05,150 --> 01:07:07,587
- "this place owns the skyline".
- 1382
- 01:07:07,620 --> 01:07:09,321
- Well, it did take us about
- a year to complete
- 1383
- 01:07:09,354 --> 01:07:11,123
- so you can imagine
- what it cost.
- 1384
- 01:07:11,156 --> 01:07:12,991
- I don't do numbers.
- 1385
- 01:07:13,025 --> 01:07:15,027
- Me neither, but like how much?
- 1386
- 01:07:15,060 --> 01:07:17,095
- Anyway, if you thought
- the penthouse is impressive
- 1387
- 01:07:17,129 --> 01:07:20,399
- you really ought to see
- his place in the Hamptons.
- 1388
- 01:07:20,433 --> 01:07:22,134
- I can't wait to own multiple
- homes in
- 1389
- 01:07:22,167 --> 01:07:23,670
- which I don't actually live.
- 1390
- 01:07:23,703 --> 01:07:26,205
- My boyfriend and I
- love the Hams.
- 1391
- 01:07:26,238 --> 01:07:28,173
- The Hams?
- 1392
- 01:07:28,207 --> 01:07:29,374
- Is that what we're calling
- it now?
- 1393
- 01:07:29,408 --> 01:07:31,076
- Only people who live there.
- 1394
- 01:07:31,109 --> 01:07:33,378
- Or people who know people,
- like my boyfriend does.
- 1395
- 01:07:33,412 --> 01:07:35,180
- You guys need to meet him.
- 1396
- 01:07:35,214 --> 01:07:36,148
- He'll be here in a minute.
- 1397
- 01:07:36,181 --> 01:07:37,015
- Mmm.
- 1398
- 01:07:37,049 --> 01:07:38,383
- You know what? I want
- some more wine.
- 1399
- 01:07:38,417 --> 01:07:39,786
- In fact, I'll take
- an I.V. of it.
- 1400
- 01:07:39,819 --> 01:07:40,520
- Noted.
- 1401
- 01:07:40,553 --> 01:07:41,386
- Two I.V.'s.
- 1402
- 01:07:41,420 --> 01:07:43,690
- Nessa, you've gotta slow
- your roll, love.
- 1403
- 01:07:43,723 --> 01:07:46,158
- Um, why are you guys here,
- again?
- 1404
- 01:07:46,191 --> 01:07:48,327
- Paul, he's doing
- the panel thing.
- 1405
- 01:07:48,360 --> 01:07:52,732
- Yeah, because he has actual
- things to say.
- 1406
- 01:07:52,765 --> 01:07:54,333
- Sorry.
- 1407
- 01:07:54,366 --> 01:07:57,135
- Um, there is a designer
- on the panel
- 1408
- 01:07:57,169 --> 01:08:00,072
- and Paul wants
- to ask her out.
- 1409
- 01:08:00,105 --> 01:08:02,107
- He makes us act like
- we're interested in him
- 1410
- 01:08:02,140 --> 01:08:04,409
- so he can, like,
- get girls.
- 1411
- 01:08:04,444 --> 01:08:06,746
- Yeah, it's legitimizing.
- 1412
- 01:08:06,779 --> 01:08:09,047
- Once I make partner I probably
- won't need it.
- 1413
- 01:08:09,081 --> 01:08:10,215
- He's right.
- 1414
- 01:08:10,249 --> 01:08:11,484
- My boyfriend's a partner.
- 1415
- 01:08:11,518 --> 01:08:12,485
- It's attractive.
- 1416
- 01:08:12,519 --> 01:08:14,787
- I mean, my boyfriend's
- already attractive.
- 1417
- 01:08:14,821 --> 01:08:16,054
- My boyfriend.
- 1418
- 01:08:16,088 --> 01:08:17,155
- My boyfriend.
- 1419
- 01:08:17,189 --> 01:08:18,056
- My boyfriend.
- 1420
- 01:08:18,090 --> 01:08:18,825
- My boyfriend.
- 1421
- 01:08:18,858 --> 01:08:20,158
- My boyfriend.
- 1422
- 01:08:20,192 --> 01:08:21,326
- My boyfriend.
- 1423
- 01:08:21,360 --> 01:08:22,462
- My boyfriend.
- 1424
- 01:08:22,495 --> 01:08:23,630
- My boyfriend.
- 1425
- 01:08:23,663 --> 01:08:25,063
- Maybe you should get
- a shirt that says
- 1426
- 01:08:25,097 --> 01:08:26,265
- "I have a boyfriend"
- 1427
- 01:08:26,298 --> 01:08:29,134
- and then you wouldn't have
- to tell us every five seconds.
- 1428
- 01:08:29,167 --> 01:08:29,736
- Ok, refill.
- 1429
- 01:08:29,769 --> 01:08:31,203
- Coming right up.
- 1430
- 01:08:31,236 --> 01:08:32,605
- I didn't mean to make
- you jealous.
- 1431
- 01:08:32,639 --> 01:08:33,405
- Of what?
- 1432
- 01:08:33,439 --> 01:08:34,406
- You know what?
- 1433
- 01:08:34,440 --> 01:08:35,475
- This is a good time to go.
- 1434
- 01:08:35,508 --> 01:08:36,275
- I'm good.
- 1435
- 01:08:36,308 --> 01:08:38,210
- Oh, there he is.
- 1436
- 01:08:46,619 --> 01:08:48,788
- Ugh.
- 1437
- 01:09:37,737 --> 01:09:39,672
- I'm all out of sausage.
- 1438
- 01:09:39,706 --> 01:09:43,108
- I hope you brought your hot,
- throbbing co-
- 1439
- 01:09:45,745 --> 01:09:48,180
- What am I doing?
- 1440
- 01:10:49,241 --> 01:10:50,510
- Thank you.
- 1441
- 01:10:50,543 --> 01:10:52,244
- We'll be in touch.
- 1442
- 01:10:53,846 --> 01:10:55,380
- It's that way.
- 1443
- 01:11:02,955 --> 01:11:04,457
- <i>Hey, Priscilla, it's me.</i>
- 1444
- 01:11:04,490 --> 01:11:06,592
- <i>So the audition went great.</i>
- 1445
- 01:11:06,626 --> 01:11:07,794
- <i>I did it!</i>
- 1446
- 01:11:07,827 --> 01:11:10,328
- <i>I finally crossed something
- big off one of my lists.</i>
- 1447
- 01:11:10,362 --> 01:11:12,498
- <i>Ah, I feel amazing.</i>
- 1448
- 01:11:27,547 --> 01:11:29,314
- Jeff's getting married?
- 1449
- 01:11:29,347 --> 01:11:31,551
- And he's inviting you?
- 1450
- 01:11:31,584 --> 01:11:33,820
- And this is his idea of
- a wedding invitation?
- 1451
- 01:11:33,853 --> 01:11:35,621
- Talk about no taste.
- 1452
- 01:11:35,655 --> 01:11:36,789
- It gets worse.
- 1453
- 01:11:36,823 --> 01:11:37,924
- Don't even.
- 1454
- 01:11:37,957 --> 01:11:39,391
- He wants you to play
- at the wedding.
- 1455
- 01:11:39,424 --> 01:11:40,392
- Us.
- 1456
- 01:11:40,426 --> 01:11:40,960
- Yeah.
- 1457
- 01:11:40,993 --> 01:11:41,894
- He wants the quartet.
- 1458
- 01:11:41,928 --> 01:11:43,261
- Well, we're not doing that.
- 1459
- 01:11:43,295 --> 01:11:44,362
- And I don't even understand,
- 1460
- 01:11:44,396 --> 01:11:45,898
- why would he want you to be
- there at the wedding?
- 1461
- 01:11:45,932 --> 01:11:47,133
- Maybe he feels guilty.
- 1462
- 01:11:47,166 --> 01:11:50,268
- I don't know, maybe he feels
- like he's doing me a big favour.
- 1463
- 01:11:50,302 --> 01:11:51,403
- How is this a favour?
- 1464
- 01:11:51,437 --> 01:11:52,739
- The girl's family is loaded.
- 1465
- 01:11:52,772 --> 01:11:55,742
- Ok, so we're absolutely
- doing it.
- 1466
- 01:11:55,775 --> 01:11:57,643
- But Jeff is a tool.
- 1467
- 01:11:57,677 --> 01:11:59,512
- And not a sharp one.
- 1468
- 01:12:00,680 --> 01:12:01,948
- Do you know, Luce, when uh,
- 1469
- 01:12:01,981 --> 01:12:05,818
- when Sharon left me
- for Jennifer...
- 1470
- 01:12:05,852 --> 01:12:08,488
- it was more the rejection
- that hurt.
- 1471
- 01:12:08,521 --> 01:12:09,889
- Not necessarily her leaving.
- 1472
- 01:12:09,922 --> 01:12:12,725
- Honestly, I don't really care
- about Jeff leaving.
- 1473
- 01:12:12,759 --> 01:12:13,993
- And who wants to have
- super lame sex
- 1474
- 01:12:14,026 --> 01:12:15,762
- the rest of their life, anyway?
- 1475
- 01:12:15,795 --> 01:12:16,863
- Uh, I do.
- 1476
- 01:12:16,896 --> 01:12:21,033
- Lame sex, virtual sex,
- the faint possibility of sex,
- 1477
- 01:12:21,067 --> 01:12:23,069
- any of which would be more
- than I'm currently getting.
- 1478
- 01:12:23,102 --> 01:12:24,904
- I can't even get my hand
- to have sex with me anymore.
- 1479
- 01:12:24,937 --> 01:12:27,372
- Yeah, well, maybe if you dressed
- up your hand like a redhead
- 1480
- 01:12:27,405 --> 01:12:29,909
- who cooks, loves musicals,
- and has a PhD...
- 1481
- 01:12:29,942 --> 01:12:31,978
- I'm sad to report
- that my standards
- 1482
- 01:12:32,011 --> 01:12:34,013
- have dropped somewhat
- significantly.
- 1483
- 01:12:34,046 --> 01:12:34,847
- Oh yeah?
- 1484
- 01:12:34,881 --> 01:12:36,381
- Well, what is your type
- these days?
- 1485
- 01:12:36,414 --> 01:12:37,884
- Willing.
- 1486
- 01:12:39,018 --> 01:12:39,886
- And I've got to go to Vegas
- for a bachelor party.
- 1487
- 01:12:39,919 --> 01:12:42,555
- I swear, all those boobs
- I can't touch
- 1488
- 01:12:42,588 --> 01:12:44,023
- might just be the end of me.
- 1489
- 01:12:44,056 --> 01:12:45,992
- Yeah, I'm pretty sure
- no one over the age of two
- 1490
- 01:12:46,025 --> 01:12:48,961
- has ever died
- from lack of boob.
- 1491
- 01:12:48,995 --> 01:12:49,796
- That's a valid point.
- 1492
- 01:12:49,829 --> 01:12:52,064
- Wait a second,
- when are you leaving?
- 1493
- 01:12:52,098 --> 01:12:52,965
- For Vegas?
- 1494
- 01:12:52,999 --> 01:12:53,966
- Yeah.
- 1495
- 01:12:54,000 --> 01:12:56,035
- Tomorrow, why?
- 1496
- 01:12:56,068 --> 01:12:57,670
- Because I need to finish
- my list
- 1497
- 01:12:57,703 --> 01:12:59,005
- and there's this Vegas thing
- on there.
- 1498
- 01:12:59,038 --> 01:13:00,973
- No, no, no, you need
- to finish it
- 1499
- 01:13:01,007 --> 01:13:02,374
- because Jeff's getting married.
- 1500
- 01:13:02,407 --> 01:13:03,341
- No, I-
- 1501
- 01:13:03,375 --> 01:13:04,577
- Besides, Grant's
- gonna be there.
- 1502
- 01:13:04,610 --> 01:13:05,978
- I don't care if Grant's
- gonna be there.
- 1503
- 01:13:06,012 --> 01:13:08,481
- I just need to finish my list,
- alright?
- 1504
- 01:13:08,514 --> 01:13:10,683
- And you're gonna help me.
- 1505
- 01:13:10,716 --> 01:13:11,717
- So just embarrassing me
- 1506
- 01:13:11,751 --> 01:13:13,853
- at the strip club wasn't enough
- for you, was it?
- 1507
- 01:13:13,886 --> 01:13:15,054
- This'll be so much better.
- 1508
- 01:13:15,087 --> 01:13:15,888
- Will it be, though?
- 1509
- 01:13:15,922 --> 01:13:16,923
- Yeah.
- 1510
- 01:13:17,790 --> 01:13:19,625
- Could I get more needles
- in here, please?
- 1511
- 01:13:19,659 --> 01:13:20,960
- Tensing up!
- 1512
- 01:13:57,063 --> 01:13:58,731
- You need to have sex.
- 1513
- 01:13:58,764 --> 01:14:00,566
- And I have to finish
- my list.
- 1514
- 01:14:00,600 --> 01:14:02,034
- So it's a win-win.
- 1515
- 01:14:02,068 --> 01:14:03,202
- Um, for losers.
- 1516
- 01:14:03,236 --> 01:14:05,938
- So I'm not sure we come out
- on the right side of this.
- 1517
- 01:14:05,972 --> 01:14:07,106
- Ok.
- 1518
- 01:14:07,139 --> 01:14:09,709
- Here is who's working today.
- 1519
- 01:14:11,777 --> 01:14:12,678
- Nope.
- 1520
- 01:14:12,712 --> 01:14:13,713
- Can't do it.
- 1521
- 01:14:13,746 --> 01:14:14,412
- Do you know what?
- 1522
- 01:14:14,447 --> 01:14:15,648
- They're probably all diseased.
- 1523
- 01:14:15,681 --> 01:14:17,717
- No, you're more likely to catch
- something in a sorority house.
- 1524
- 01:14:17,750 --> 01:14:18,951
- See?
- 1525
- 01:14:18,985 --> 01:14:21,554
- Here is a whole information
- sheet about their weekly tests,
- 1526
- 01:14:21,587 --> 01:14:23,522
- how they check each customer
- for symptoms,
- 1527
- 01:14:23,556 --> 01:14:26,993
- and clean everyone's genitals
- with anti-bacterial-
- 1528
- 01:14:27,026 --> 01:14:28,661
- How about we don't use
- the word "genitals"?
- 1529
- 01:14:28,694 --> 01:14:30,196
- Will you please just go
- in there and do the deed
- 1530
- 01:14:30,229 --> 01:14:31,430
- so you can report back?
- 1531
- 01:14:31,464 --> 01:14:33,466
- Why don't you just go inside
- and do the deed and report back?
- 1532
- 01:14:33,499 --> 01:14:35,434
- Because they don't service
- lesbians or straight girls
- 1533
- 01:14:35,468 --> 01:14:36,802
- who like sex with women.
- 1534
- 01:14:36,836 --> 01:14:39,005
- How do you know they
- don't service women?
- 1535
- 01:14:39,038 --> 01:14:41,807
- Oh my god, you called
- and asked for yourself.
- 1536
- 01:14:41,841 --> 01:14:44,443
- Wow, you really have
- turned over a new leaf.
- 1537
- 01:14:44,477 --> 01:14:47,847
- Look, you buy women
- nice dinners all the time
- 1538
- 01:14:47,880 --> 01:14:49,115
- hoping to get sex out of it,
- correct?
- 1539
- 01:14:49,148 --> 01:14:50,883
- What?
- 1540
- 01:14:50,917 --> 01:14:51,984
- Pfff.
- 1541
- 01:14:53,986 --> 01:14:54,654
- I- I do.
- 1542
- 01:14:54,687 --> 01:14:55,855
- Yeah.
- 1543
- 01:14:55,888 --> 01:14:59,025
- So that's just a more honest
- side of the exact same coin,
- 1544
- 01:14:59,058 --> 01:15:01,761
- and it's perfectly natural.
- 1545
- 01:15:02,762 --> 01:15:04,897
- I'm not going in there alone.
- 1546
- 01:15:04,931 --> 01:15:07,566
- Well, great, let's get
- in there.
- 1547
- 01:15:07,600 --> 01:15:09,936
- Wow. Called my bluff.
- 1548
- 01:15:12,271 --> 01:15:14,206
- Oh boy, this is happening.
- 1549
- 01:15:16,642 --> 01:15:18,144
- Hey, sweetheart.
- 1550
- 01:15:18,177 --> 01:15:19,745
- You worry too much.
- 1551
- 01:15:19,779 --> 01:15:22,581
- I told you there'd be other
- normal people here.
- 1552
- 01:15:22,615 --> 01:15:23,716
- Howdy, fellas.
- 1553
- 01:15:23,749 --> 01:15:25,484
- How y'all doin' today?
- 1554
- 01:15:25,518 --> 01:15:28,187
- We're here to get her some,
- if you know what I mean.
- 1555
- 01:15:28,220 --> 01:15:30,690
- Ain't that right,
- honey bunch?
- 1556
- 01:15:30,723 --> 01:15:33,092
- It's a perfectly natural thing.
- 1557
- 01:15:33,125 --> 01:15:35,494
- What dialect is that?
- 1558
- 01:15:35,528 --> 01:15:36,662
- Is it not southern?
- 1559
- 01:15:36,696 --> 01:15:38,030
- Not at all.
- 1560
- 01:15:38,064 --> 01:15:40,232
- And just to be clear,
- this is already not worth it.
- 1561
- 01:15:40,266 --> 01:15:43,035
- Just so we are clear, am I to
- share your girl or get my own?
- 1562
- 01:15:43,069 --> 01:15:45,972
- I mean, we've not really worked
- out any of the details here.
- 1563
- 01:15:47,640 --> 01:15:48,741
- Oh.
- 1564
- 01:15:50,309 --> 01:15:51,677
- Interesting.
- 1565
- 01:15:52,244 --> 01:15:55,247
- Ladies? Please say hello.
- 1566
- 01:15:56,148 --> 01:15:59,018
- Just like that, here they come,
- down the staircase.
- 1567
- 01:15:59,051 --> 01:16:01,120
- Oh, that's a nice dress.
- 1568
- 01:16:02,088 --> 01:16:03,489
- Thank you.
- 1569
- 01:16:03,956 --> 01:16:05,558
- I need to go to the bathroom.
- 1570
- 01:16:05,591 --> 01:16:08,761
- Uh... I can't do this.
- 1571
- 01:16:08,794 --> 01:16:09,929
- I'm so, so sorry.
- 1572
- 01:16:09,962 --> 01:16:10,963
- May I squeeze through?
- 1573
- 01:16:10,997 --> 01:16:13,032
- Good luck.
- 1574
- 01:16:13,733 --> 01:16:15,868
- What happened to your boyfriend?
- 1575
- 01:16:15,901 --> 01:16:18,070
- Oh, no, he's not
- my boyfriend.
- 1576
- 01:16:18,104 --> 01:16:22,041
- He's more of a colleague.
- 1577
- 01:16:22,074 --> 01:16:23,976
- Excuse me, doll?
- 1578
- 01:16:24,010 --> 01:16:26,779
- We don't service
- single women here.
- 1579
- 01:16:26,812 --> 01:16:30,883
- Actually, I want to apply
- for a job.
- 1580
- 01:16:31,917 --> 01:16:33,085
- As...?
- 1581
- 01:16:33,119 --> 01:16:35,087
- As a... you know,
- 1582
- 01:16:35,121 --> 01:16:37,790
- what they are-do.
- 1583
- 01:16:37,823 --> 01:16:38,991
- Hi.
- 1584
- 01:16:39,025 --> 01:16:41,694
- You want to be a working girl.
- 1585
- 01:16:41,727 --> 01:16:43,095
- Yeah.
- 1586
- 01:16:49,869 --> 01:16:51,003
- Wow.
- 1587
- 01:16:51,037 --> 01:16:52,304
- How'd it go?
- 1588
- 01:16:52,338 --> 01:16:55,875
- Well, I applied to be
- one of the girls.
- 1589
- 01:16:55,908 --> 01:16:57,043
- I'm sorry, what?
- 1590
- 01:16:57,076 --> 01:16:59,712
- Well, I didn't get the job,
- obviously.
- 1591
- 01:16:59,745 --> 01:17:00,946
- So quick question.
- 1592
- 01:17:00,980 --> 01:17:02,281
- When I tell the story later,
- 1593
- 01:17:02,314 --> 01:17:03,849
- which do you think is going
- to be better?
- 1594
- 01:17:03,883 --> 01:17:05,618
- The fact that you applied
- to be a prostitute
- 1595
- 01:17:05,651 --> 01:17:06,986
- or that you didn't get
- the job?
- 1596
- 01:17:07,019 --> 01:17:08,654
- Anyway, I'm really sorry
- 1597
- 01:17:08,687 --> 01:17:10,022
- that you're late for
- your bachelor party.
- 1598
- 01:17:10,056 --> 01:17:10,790
- No, that's alright.
- 1599
- 01:17:10,823 --> 01:17:11,724
- I'll just tell them
- the truth,
- 1600
- 01:17:11,757 --> 01:17:13,826
- that you got hung up
- at a job interview.
- 1601
- 01:17:13,859 --> 01:17:15,127
- I'm just teasing.
- 1602
- 01:17:15,161 --> 01:17:16,962
- They'd be lucky
- to have you.
- 1603
- 01:17:16,996 --> 01:17:18,130
- Thank you.
- 1604
- 01:17:33,712 --> 01:17:34,814
- Here we are, huh?
- 1605
- 01:17:34,847 --> 01:17:37,249
- Well, I mean, are you sure you
- don't wanna come along?
- 1606
- 01:17:37,283 --> 01:17:39,118
- You can always be the
- entertainment package.
- 1607
- 01:17:39,151 --> 01:17:41,720
- No, I'm just gonna
- wander around.
- 1608
- 01:17:41,754 --> 01:17:42,556
- Alright.
- 1609
- 01:17:42,588 --> 01:17:44,090
- All I want right now
- is a quiet bar
- 1610
- 01:17:44,123 --> 01:17:46,625
- and an artfully
- crafted cocktail.
- 1611
- 01:17:46,659 --> 01:17:47,226
- Fair enough.
- 1612
- 01:17:47,259 --> 01:17:47,893
- Have fun!
- 1613
- 01:17:47,927 --> 01:17:49,228
- Alright, have a good night!
- 1614
- 01:17:51,097 --> 01:17:53,032
- Woooo!
- 1615
- 01:17:57,069 --> 01:17:58,237
- Yes!
- 1616
- 01:17:59,038 --> 01:18:00,239
- Ooh, that's strong.
- 1617
- 01:18:00,272 --> 01:18:01,874
- Let's take a picture.
- 1618
- 01:18:02,074 --> 01:18:03,375
- My new friends.
- 1619
- 01:18:03,409 --> 01:18:05,911
- One, two, three.
- 1620
- 01:18:08,080 --> 01:18:09,348
- Alright, Vegas.
- 1621
- 01:18:09,381 --> 01:18:12,218
- Welcome to karaoke night
- at the Blue Saloon.
- 1622
- 01:18:12,251 --> 01:18:14,220
- Up next we've got...
- 1623
- 01:18:16,288 --> 01:18:17,990
- Lucy Neal.
- 1624
- 01:18:18,023 --> 01:18:18,991
- Come on up.
- 1625
- 01:18:19,024 --> 01:18:19,992
- What?
- 1626
- 01:18:20,025 --> 01:18:21,026
- Oh, no.
- 1627
- 01:18:21,060 --> 01:18:22,795
- No, I didn't sign up.
- 1628
- 01:18:22,828 --> 01:18:24,997
- Well, someone put your name
- in there.
- 1629
- 01:18:26,031 --> 01:18:29,702
- Well... actually,
- I don't sing.
- 1630
- 01:18:29,735 --> 01:18:30,970
- What do you do, then?
- 1631
- 01:18:31,003 --> 01:18:35,442
- Um... I'm a violinist?
- 1632
- 01:18:35,475 --> 01:18:37,042
- Oh.
- 1633
- 01:18:38,344 --> 01:18:39,712
- Well then why don't
- you come down
- 1634
- 01:18:39,745 --> 01:18:40,679
- and play some violin for us?
- 1635
- 01:18:40,713 --> 01:18:41,113
- Oh, no, no, no.
- 1636
- 01:18:41,147 --> 01:18:41,780
- No, I'm good.
- 1637
- 01:18:41,814 --> 01:18:42,815
- Thank you.
- 1638
- 01:18:42,848 --> 01:18:44,016
- Come on, there's only like
- five people in here.
- 1639
- 01:18:44,049 --> 01:18:45,351
- What've you got to lose?
- 1640
- 01:18:45,384 --> 01:18:46,952
- Get up here, have some fun.
- 1641
- 01:18:47,454 --> 01:18:48,821
- Crap.
- 1642
- 01:18:49,054 --> 01:18:50,289
- Ok.
- 1643
- 01:18:51,824 --> 01:18:53,859
- Not cool, guys.
- 1644
- 01:18:54,727 --> 01:18:55,961
- Give it up for Lucy.
- 1645
- 01:18:59,231 --> 01:19:01,367
- I play classical mostly.
- 1646
- 01:19:01,400 --> 01:19:02,234
- Don't worry about it.
- 1647
- 01:19:02,268 --> 01:19:03,736
- Just play along.
- We're in the key of G.
- 1648
- 01:19:03,769 --> 01:19:04,270
- It's an original.
- 1649
- 01:19:04,303 --> 01:19:05,738
- There's your bow.
- 1650
- 01:19:07,907 --> 01:19:09,175
- Are you guys ready?
- 1651
- 01:19:44,076 --> 01:19:48,814
- ♪ Hello my lovely baby,
- I want you near, ♪
- 1652
- 01:19:48,847 --> 01:19:51,016
- ♪ I see you walking
- through my door, ♪
- 1653
- 01:19:51,050 --> 01:19:52,519
- ♪ And it is clear, ♪
- 1654
- 01:19:52,552 --> 01:19:57,089
- ♪ I need you more and more,
- don't I? ♪
- 1655
- 01:19:57,122 --> 01:20:01,126
- ♪ I want you more and more
- in my life, ♪
- 1656
- 01:20:01,160 --> 01:20:04,464
- ♪ So hey, come on in, ♪
- 1657
- 01:20:21,113 --> 01:20:22,982
- ♪ Wake me up, baby, ♪
- 1658
- 01:20:23,015 --> 01:20:26,018
- ♪ I feel I'm getting cold, ♪
- 1659
- 01:20:29,955 --> 01:20:32,091
- ♪ Wake me up, baby, ♪
- 1660
- 01:20:32,124 --> 01:20:35,227
- ♪ I feel my heart
- in my soul, ♪
- 1661
- 01:20:37,464 --> 01:20:38,797
- ♪ Yeah, yeah, ♪
- 1662
- 01:20:38,831 --> 01:20:40,567
- ♪ Wake me up, baby, ♪
- 1663
- 01:20:40,600 --> 01:20:43,135
- ♪ Wake me up in my soul, ♪
- 1664
- 01:20:47,006 --> 01:20:49,174
- ♪ Wake me up baby, ♪
- 1665
- 01:20:49,208 --> 01:20:52,177
- ♪ I feel my heart's
- getting cold, ♪
- 1666
- 01:20:52,211 --> 01:20:53,245
- ♪ I don't wanna get cold, ♪
- 1667
- 01:20:53,279 --> 01:20:54,213
- ♪ Now, warm me up, ♪
- 1668
- 01:20:54,246 --> 01:20:56,382
- ♪ warm me up,
- warm me up, ♪
- 1669
- 01:20:58,250 --> 01:21:02,354
- ♪ And I am fallin' fallin'
- fallin' for you so I, ♪
- 1670
- 01:21:02,388 --> 01:21:04,423
- ♪ Realize I that
- I am old and, ♪
- 1671
- 01:21:04,457 --> 01:21:08,927
- ♪ Suddenly it seems
- everyone has left me, ♪
- 1672
- 01:21:08,961 --> 01:21:11,964
- ♪ Suddenly as it seems
- as the future's ♪
- 1673
- 01:21:11,997 --> 01:21:15,000
- ♪ right in front of me ♪
- 1674
- 01:21:18,037 --> 01:21:18,538
- Yeah!
- 1675
- 01:21:18,571 --> 01:21:19,838
- Alright, Lucy!
- 1676
- 01:21:21,106 --> 01:21:22,841
- Yeah.
- 1677
- 01:21:22,875 --> 01:21:25,044
- Well done.
- 1678
- 01:21:25,077 --> 01:21:27,146
- <i>Alright, let's see
- who's up next.</i>
- 1679
- 01:21:27,179 --> 01:21:29,848
- <i>Anyone else have any
- hidden talents out there?</i>
- 1680
- 01:21:32,184 --> 01:21:33,486
- What're you doing here?
- 1681
- 01:21:33,520 --> 01:21:37,189
- Shouldn't you be at the bachelor
- party with Paul?
- 1682
- 01:21:37,222 --> 01:21:39,992
- Paul showed me the picture
- you texted him
- 1683
- 01:21:40,025 --> 01:21:43,262
- of you and the posse
- of Harvard boys.
- 1684
- 01:21:43,295 --> 01:21:44,464
- I recognized the bar so-
- 1685
- 01:21:44,497 --> 01:21:45,197
- What, so you-
- 1686
- 01:21:45,230 --> 01:21:47,099
- Thought I'd come looking
- for you.
- 1687
- 01:21:47,132 --> 01:21:49,602
- Please tell me you've got
- better than that.
- 1688
- 01:21:53,372 --> 01:21:55,307
- How about I tell you how sorry
- I am that I fell off
- 1689
- 01:21:55,341 --> 01:21:57,376
- the face of the earth?
- 1690
- 01:21:59,078 --> 01:22:00,346
- I was an idiot.
- 1691
- 01:22:00,379 --> 01:22:03,115
- Why didn't you call?
- 1692
- 01:22:03,148 --> 01:22:05,351
- A bunch of reasons.
- 1693
- 01:22:05,384 --> 01:22:07,152
- None of them good.
- 1694
- 01:22:08,987 --> 01:22:10,055
- Ok, look.
- 1695
- 01:22:10,089 --> 01:22:11,491
- This has been fun and thank you
- for whatever this is
- 1696
- 01:22:11,524 --> 01:22:12,191
- but I am not-
- 1697
- 01:22:12,224 --> 01:22:13,258
- But-but wait.
- 1698
- 01:22:13,292 --> 01:22:16,128
- Can I just have one second?
- 1699
- 01:22:16,161 --> 01:22:20,366
- Meeting you was
- a big surprise.
- 1700
- 01:22:20,399 --> 01:22:25,204
- And then I realized how much
- I really liked you.
- 1701
- 01:22:25,237 --> 01:22:26,238
- But then I-I just-
- 1702
- 01:22:26,271 --> 01:22:29,074
- Decided to show your
- considerable appreciation
- 1703
- 01:22:29,108 --> 01:22:33,045
- by sleeping with me
- and then running out?
- 1704
- 01:22:33,078 --> 01:22:35,515
- It's just-it's a scary
- proposition.
- 1705
- 01:22:35,548 --> 01:22:36,382
- What's scary?
- 1706
- 01:22:36,415 --> 01:22:36,949
- I'm scary?
- 1707
- 01:22:36,982 --> 01:22:39,952
- What is scary about me?
- 1708
- 01:22:43,222 --> 01:22:48,026
- For starters, you're
- obsessed with sex.
- 1709
- 01:22:52,632 --> 01:22:58,337
- Look, you came around
- at a really weird time.
- 1710
- 01:22:58,370 --> 01:23:00,406
- And I know the list is bizarre
- 1711
- 01:23:00,440 --> 01:23:04,076
- but I've got something
- important to prove.
- 1712
- 01:23:04,109 --> 01:23:05,277
- Prove what? To who?
- 1713
- 01:23:05,310 --> 01:23:07,079
- To myself.
- 1714
- 01:23:09,749 --> 01:23:16,321
- I guess... I need to prove
- to myself that I'm enough.
- 1715
- 01:23:25,197 --> 01:23:27,366
- Leaving like that
- was a mistake.
- 1716
- 01:23:27,399 --> 01:23:30,703
- Not calling you
- was a mistake.
- 1717
- 01:23:30,737 --> 01:23:33,673
- Will you please forgive me?
- 1718
- 01:23:51,290 --> 01:23:52,459
- Sorry.
- 1719
- 01:23:57,730 --> 01:23:58,197
- Woah, woah, woah.
- 1720
- 01:23:58,230 --> 01:23:59,198
- Wait. Wait. Stop.
- 1721
- 01:23:59,231 --> 01:23:59,933
- Stop?
- 1722
- 01:23:59,965 --> 01:24:02,201
- I don't wanna hurt
- the baby.
- 1723
- 01:24:02,234 --> 01:24:03,770
- What?
- 1724
- 01:24:03,803 --> 01:24:08,073
- Um... I'm not pregnant.
- 1725
- 01:24:08,106 --> 01:24:09,374
- I beg your pardon?
- 1726
- 01:24:09,408 --> 01:24:10,108
- Wait-
- 1727
- 01:24:10,142 --> 01:24:11,210
- You're not?
- 1728
- 01:24:11,243 --> 01:24:13,746
- I know-I know
- I've been emotional
- 1729
- 01:24:13,780 --> 01:24:16,516
- and like I'm craving some weird
- stuff, but oh my-oh my god,
- 1730
- 01:24:16,549 --> 01:24:17,149
- do I look pregnant?
- 1731
- 01:24:17,182 --> 01:24:18,116
- No, no, no.
- 1732
- 01:24:18,150 --> 01:24:18,918
- You're not emotional.
- 1733
- 01:24:18,952 --> 01:24:20,185
- You look stunning
- and beautiful.
- 1734
- 01:24:20,219 --> 01:24:26,225
- It's uh, at your house you had
- maternity pants on the chair.
- 1735
- 01:24:26,258 --> 01:24:28,728
- Honestly, I saw the pants
- and I freaked out
- 1736
- 01:24:28,761 --> 01:24:31,029
- and that's why I left.
- 1737
- 01:24:31,063 --> 01:24:33,198
- Oh my god.
- 1738
- 01:24:33,232 --> 01:24:35,200
- What?
- 1739
- 01:24:35,234 --> 01:24:36,168
- Oh my god.
- 1740
- 01:24:36,201 --> 01:24:39,706
- You left because you thought
- I was pregnant?
- 1741
- 01:24:39,739 --> 01:24:41,206
- It's a scary proposition.
- 1742
- 01:24:46,278 --> 01:24:47,412
- Wow.
- 1743
- 01:24:50,583 --> 01:24:52,084
- Wait.
- 1744
- 01:24:53,185 --> 01:24:56,556
- You thought that and you
- still wanted to be with me.
- 1745
- 01:25:06,466 --> 01:25:07,834
- We like the same books.
- 1746
- 01:25:07,867 --> 01:25:09,334
- Mmm.
- 1747
- 01:25:09,368 --> 01:25:11,136
- Not in the same order.
- 1748
- 01:25:11,169 --> 01:25:12,237
- You're right.
- 1749
- 01:25:12,271 --> 01:25:14,406
- It's never gonna work.
- 1750
- 01:25:41,133 --> 01:25:42,100
- <i>Luce, it's Paul.</i>
- 1751
- 01:25:42,134 --> 01:25:42,802
- <i>You're never gonna believe this.</i>
- 1752
- 01:25:42,835 --> 01:25:43,903
- <i>I've met the girl of my dreams.</i>
- 1753
- 01:25:43,937 --> 01:25:46,405
- <i>Her name is Destiny and yes,
- she is a stripper.</i>
- 1754
- 01:25:46,439 --> 01:25:48,106
- <i>Let me tell you...</i>
- 1755
- 01:25:51,209 --> 01:25:52,879
- <i>Hi Lucy, Howard Gregson.</i>
- 1756
- 01:25:52,912 --> 01:25:56,114
- <i>Our committee loved
- your audition but ultimately</i>
- 1757
- 01:25:56,148 --> 01:25:58,585
- <i>decided your playing
- is too expansive.</i>
- 1758
- 01:25:58,618 --> 01:26:01,320
- <i>A hair uninhibited
- for our conductor.</i>
- 1759
- 01:26:01,353 --> 01:26:04,156
- <i>But I think your skills
- are just a bit misplaced.</i>
- 1760
- 01:26:04,189 --> 01:26:06,158
- <i>To that end I have an
- opportunity coming up</i>
- 1761
- 01:26:06,191 --> 01:26:07,827
- <i>in a couple of weeks.</i>
- 1762
- 01:26:33,553 --> 01:26:34,854
- - Hey.
- - Hey.
- 1763
- 01:26:34,887 --> 01:26:35,888
- You all ready
- for the wedding?
- 1764
- 01:26:35,922 --> 01:26:39,224
- Yes, but there's something
- we need to do first.
- 1765
- 01:26:46,466 --> 01:26:48,200
- Wow.
- 1766
- 01:26:48,233 --> 01:26:49,902
- Well, you've still got one
- more thing on your list.
- 1767
- 01:26:49,936 --> 01:26:51,403
- Oh.
- 1768
- 01:26:51,437 --> 01:26:52,572
- Yes, I do.
- 1769
- 01:26:52,605 --> 01:26:54,172
- Let's go.
- 1770
- 01:27:01,447 --> 01:27:01,981
- There you go.
- 1771
- 01:27:02,015 --> 01:27:02,949
- Thank you guys so much.
- 1772
- 01:27:02,982 --> 01:27:04,517
- Thank you.
- 1773
- 01:27:04,550 --> 01:27:05,417
- - Hi.
- - Hi.
- 1774
- 01:27:05,451 --> 01:27:06,318
- Hey.
- 1775
- 01:27:06,351 --> 01:27:07,386
- Who can I make it out to?
- 1776
- 01:27:07,419 --> 01:27:08,286
- Uh, Lucy.
- 1777
- 01:27:08,320 --> 01:27:10,222
- Yeah, she's a big fan.
- 1778
- 01:27:10,255 --> 01:27:12,257
- Um, how do I spell that?
- 1779
- 01:27:13,960 --> 01:27:16,863
- Actually, there's a much
- bigger fan
- 1780
- 01:27:16,896 --> 01:27:19,632
- that you should make this
- out to.
- 1781
- 01:27:21,968 --> 01:27:25,337
- I mean, this is just so Jeff.
- 1782
- 01:27:26,839 --> 01:27:27,940
- Care to dance?
- 1783
- 01:27:27,974 --> 01:27:30,175
- Yes, I would love to.
- 1784
- 01:27:49,529 --> 01:27:51,497
- Ok, Stan.
- 1785
- 01:27:51,531 --> 01:27:52,932
- Woo!
- 1786
- 01:27:52,965 --> 01:27:53,533
- Hey, there she is.
- 1787
- 01:27:53,566 --> 01:27:55,400
- Here, come on.
- Switch.
- 1788
- 01:27:55,435 --> 01:27:56,602
- Oh.
- 1789
- 01:27:57,537 --> 01:27:58,771
- Hey, congratulations.
- 1790
- 01:27:58,805 --> 01:27:59,505
- Oh, thanks.
- 1791
- 01:27:59,539 --> 01:28:01,306
- And thanks for playing
- for us.
- 1792
- 01:28:01,339 --> 01:28:03,509
- The force is strong
- with you.
- 1793
- 01:28:07,146 --> 01:28:08,481
- Mind if I...?
- 1794
- 01:28:09,515 --> 01:28:10,883
- That's cool.
- 1795
- 01:28:12,585 --> 01:28:14,554
- Thanks for doing this.
- 1796
- 01:28:14,587 --> 01:28:16,288
- The price was right.
- 1797
- 01:28:16,321 --> 01:28:17,190
- Is that the only reason?
- 1798
- 01:28:17,222 --> 01:28:21,427
- No. Well, maybe.
- Ok, yes. It was. But...
- 1799
- 01:28:21,461 --> 01:28:22,360
- Ok.
- 1800
- 01:28:22,394 --> 01:28:23,930
- I'm glad I did.
- 1801
- 01:28:23,963 --> 01:28:24,897
- I'm glad we're good.
- 1802
- 01:28:24,931 --> 01:28:26,532
- Me too.
- 1803
- 01:28:26,566 --> 01:28:27,533
- Uh, I gotta ask you.
- 1804
- 01:28:27,567 --> 01:28:31,971
- Um, whatever happened
- to that list you had?
- 1805
- 01:28:32,004 --> 01:28:33,973
- The interesting one?
- 1806
- 01:28:34,006 --> 01:28:36,843
- Wait until you see the wedding
- gift I got for you.
- 1807
- 01:28:53,626 --> 01:28:55,928
- I can't find it.
- 1808
- 01:28:55,962 --> 01:28:59,532
- That's because
- it's right here.
- 1809
- 01:29:01,333 --> 01:29:04,537
- And I can't wait to give it
- to you.
- 1810
- 01:29:13,813 --> 01:29:15,047
- I'm... married.
- 1811
- 01:29:15,081 --> 01:29:16,916
- I'm-I got married.
- 1812
- 01:29:16,949 --> 01:29:19,585
- I'm married today.
- 1813
- 01:29:22,088 --> 01:29:24,090
- Thank you so much
- for doing this.
- 1814
- 01:29:24,123 --> 01:29:25,658
- What can I say?
- 1815
- 01:29:25,691 --> 01:29:26,926
- I believe in love.
- 1816
- 01:29:26,959 --> 01:29:29,061
- Hey, Luce, all the bridesmaids
- are twerking
- 1817
- 01:29:29,095 --> 01:29:30,530
- on the dance floor...
- 1818
- 01:29:30,563 --> 01:29:32,598
- Hi.
- 1819
- 01:29:32,632 --> 01:29:33,499
- I'm Paul.
- 1820
- 01:29:33,533 --> 01:29:36,035
- I'm Honey.
- 1821
- 01:29:36,068 --> 01:29:38,971
- Delighted.
- 1822
- 01:29:39,005 --> 01:29:40,473
- Are you gonna ask me
- to dance?
- 1823
- 01:29:40,506 --> 01:29:41,474
- Yes, yes I am.
- 1824
- 01:29:41,507 --> 01:29:43,042
- Right this way, please.
- 1825
- 01:29:52,417 --> 01:29:53,719
- <i>Alright, ladies and gentlemen,</i>
- 1826
- 01:29:53,753 --> 01:29:56,421
- <i>there's only a few songs left
- so get out on the dance floor.</i>
- 1827
- 01:29:56,455 --> 01:29:59,391
- <i>Let's celebrate
- Jeff and Anne tonight.</i>
- 1828
- 01:29:59,424 --> 01:30:01,027
- <i>Let's send them off
- with style.</i>
- 1829
- 01:30:01,060 --> 01:30:04,730
- <i>Don't forget to tip
- your bartender.</i>
- 1830
- 01:30:20,813 --> 01:30:21,547
- What?
- 1831
- 01:32:30,770 --> 01:32:35,770
- Subtitles by explosiveskull
- www.OpenSubtitles.org
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