Mirit

~BEGIN: Day One~

You are Mirit, perfectly normal young adult who has absolutely no hikikomori tedencies. You were heading out to get the groceries when you saw the door no longer lead outside - and you knew it was time to go.

But you couldn't leave without saying goodbye - so while you began packing, you loaded up Wakfu. The dolls go in first. Then glasses case... Hmm. Baggie with toiletries and makeup. A dildo or two. Some rope. Hmmm... diary, that game book - this looks like something right out of it - and of course a novel.

Mirit: Hey, Kazuma. Got a minute or you killin shit?

Kazuma: Nah, Not busy especially

Mirit: Ah, good. I...

How... exactly, do you explain this?

Mirit: I'm going on a trip, and I don't know if I'll have internet access. Not sure how long I'll be gone, either. Came up sort of last minute.

Congratulations, you win the 'this is completely uncharacteristic of you' and 'largest understatement of the year' awards.

Kazuma: ... Did you get into shit with the yakuza
Kazuma: I told you those idiots were bad news

Mirit: NO Kazuma I did not get into shit with the yakuza.
Mirit: I've just gotta go home for a while, and I have no idea if they've modernized yet or what.

Aww, he cares! Don't get any ideas, damnit. Let's throw in the netbook and phone just in case, some pencils and pens, your pills.  The herbs and oil warmer, the tealights, lighter... That's enough junk, Mirit. Oh, wait. Jewelry. Okay, NOW you're done with the junk.

Next some clothes - gotta get the socks and undies, sneakers and sandals, some pjs and a jacket... shawl? Shawl.

Music player for some theme music... Steady now, time to go.

Mirit: And I didn't tell *you* because I like you or anything. Stupid bloodSac.

Kazuma: And you're offline already. Crap. Also, how tsun of you. fuckin' airCra.

When you stepped through the portal, though, there was only one thought on your mind: Where am I?

You find yourself... Somewhere. Somewhere cold. And drippy. And dark, kind of. The ground's hard, but slick, but cold. Naturally, the moment you go to take a step, your feet fly out from under you. "WAUGH!" You hit the ground hard enough to knock the breath from your lungs. Ow.

It takes a minute for you to sit up and start digging for your tealights and lighter to take a look around.

Welp. This is definitely some sort of natural stone enclosure formed of sedimentary deposits left behind by water leaching down from the surface over the course of a very long time indeed.

It's not long before you meet your first bat. Yeah, you guess every one of this sort of formation needs a bat.

"... A fucking ca-AAAAUGH!" You're glad you're still on your ass when you meet THE BAT. Still, despite your shrieking miminess, you manage to calm down enough to look around and actually see where you are - AFTER taking off your backpack so you won't fall on it again and maybe break something.

Hm. Well, if you're careful with your footing, after a moment to realize that your tealight is burning a little too purple, you think you can see a drier spot up ahead.

Okay. Okay you can do this. You grab a second tealight and carefully make your way to the drier spot, to leave the tealight - so you can bring your stuff over once you've got the spot marked. You're not taking chances.

Wait, purple?

Yeeep, that's some mighty fine purple-flecked flames there. Weird, but not weird enough to stop you. You put one light down, and carefully make your way back to your stuff to haul it over very, very carefully.

... That looks like a small screen, with a bunch of servers attached to it. The screen is flickering, with a red background in front of a black heart. It doesn't seem plugged in to anything. There's also a small drawer, which contains several flash-drive looking devices. "Take one, and only one."

"... Huh. Okay then...?" You set your stuff down and put the lights where you aren't likely to knock them over, then carefully take one and start to examine it!

Yeah that's gonna do jack shit not plugged into something, isn't it? You grab your computer, power it up, and plug that fucker in!

HEART SERVER PLUG AND PLAY DETECTED. USE THUMB IMPRINT TO CONTINUE. Oh, it's a thumbprint reader? This is all in a command prompt window that popped up.

Huh, neat. You scan your thumb?

NOW CHECKING AGAINST TIMELESS SPACE DATABASE.

"What." You wait for it to finish before you remove your thumb - wouldn't want to screw up the reading or whatever it's doing.

... SIGNATURE NOT NOTED BEFORE THIS DELTA POINT. NEW ENTRY CONFIRMED. NOTIFYING LOCAL ADMIN. WELCOME. PLEASE SELECT A HANDLE THAT YOU WILL USE FOR THE REST OF YOUR STAY HERE IN TIMELESS SPACE, SO WE MAY CROSS-CHECK IT WITH THE PARADOX DATABASE. THANK YOU FOR YOUR CO-OPERATION.

"Well if that don't beat all." You mutter, and consider. ... Huh, this is a chance to not be Miranda! With a grin, you type in,

Mirit

Cross-checking . . . . . . . . CONFIRMED, CORRECT HANDLE. WELCOME, MIRIT.

"Weeeeird." You ponder. Is... that all it wanted?

For the moment, yes. It's installing a chat client on your computer, sort of- it's all .dll. And it's also looking like it's got some menus that it can go through. Job boards, contacting the local admin through both Trillian and Skype, Resleeve, Calibrate, Help (Local Orienteering), Help Help (Map Use), Help Help Help (Commands and other items), and NEW KIDS CLICK HERE, SIGNED, TOOT ORIOLE.

... SERIOUSLY?! After a rather epic facepalm, you click the new kids thing. This had better not be obnoxious.

Oh, hey, it's a guide. Mostly step by step. The narrator's some oriole with a trumpet. Of course it is. Still, might as well go through it.

It goes through most of the various commands that a new user will need, but emphasizes that the first thing a new user will want to do is CALIBRATE. This is because physical laws work a little differently out here in timeless space! Otherwise you might end up a right mess, and remember, Dead Mirits Are The Enemy.

Of course the calibration in the tutorial isn't the calibration for real, but it does guide you through it, step by step, noting where most of it's automated and pointing out the common hiccups. It's not even that annoying!

Welp, you'd probably better do what the little bird says and CALIBRATE. Hopefully this isn't a Dragonings Calibration... You follow the directions carefully!

Yeah, you got one of the common hiccups, the one where it detects active metasomal genes in certain places. No one likes cancer, though. In fact it's safe to say that cancer HATES YOU AND EVERYTHING YOU STAND FOR, so.

You refer back to the tutorial. Is this a glitch or something you should take seriously...?

"Usually they'll detect a few metasomal genes, especially if you're from an area with high pollution. This isn't a glitch, but rather a preventative measure."

Hmm. Well, what's the calibrator want to do about it then...? Slash, what does the guide say to do. Yay for simultaneous viewing.

The calibrator wants to correct the gene to a less potentially carcinogenic state. The tutorial agrees. ... Someone found a cancer vaccine out here, huh?

Welp, she'd better let it do it then! Better safe than sorry about that.

... PROCESSES HALTED. Detected above acceptable levels in bloodstream: Hg, CO, CN, S, U, Pu, herbicide tags, herbicide, pesticide tags, pesticide... The list goes on for a bit, then asks if she'd like to accept free treatment for what appears to be a laundry list of a recipe for stunted growth and nerve damage. Criminy!

Mirit starts to pale. Oh, crap. That would be a resounding YES.

PLEASE LAY DOWN ON MAT TO BE PROVIDED BY HEART SERVER <IP address>. The server is... Unfolding. Where the heck did it get a bed from!? ... THIS IS VIDJA GAME LOGIC LAND, isn't it? She lays down like a relatively genre-savvy gal should.

Okay those are some pneumas and some poky things and is that stuff green? not that she can see it but the readout says NOW CHELATING. Eek? Eek. That might be an understatement.

... PLEASE DO NOT MOVE DURING CHELATION PROCESS.

... PATIENT IS NOW TO BE SECURED, STAND BY...

... Eek.

You are Mirit, and you have just fainted. You don't even notice the sedation, and mostly sleep through the dialysis that follows when all that shit is chelated- slowly, so as not to cause blockage- out of your blood.

Yeah that's not very fun to watch...

YOU ARE NOW KAZUMA. You just got off Wakfu because apparently Mirit went crazy and decided the best way to deal with la cosa nostra was to run. Frankly you warned her about that a couple of times but right now your heart's just not in it, especially because apparently she went all 'tsun' on you for no reason. That was especially worrying- it seemed way out of character for her.

The question is, what can you do about it, really?

One option is to head for her. Another is to head downstairs into the surplus shop. ... Well, you couldn't head for her without a stop at the shop anyways, right? True enough- at the very least you'd have to collect your passport, and cash, and who knows what the fuck else arrangements would have to be made. If she's really in trouble, you'd do it, but... You don't know that for sure.

... The door opens onto a swirling portal right out of Dungeons: The Dragoning. In fact you're pretty sure you've described it exactly as it appears to you now.

Scratch that. If this portal is appearing, now, when you thought of that, she's in trouble and probably isn't aware of it yet. You mentally beg your father for forgiveness while you rifle through the back stock, taking utility knives and other survival equipment you think you'll need. Guns, not so much.

Don't forget your clothes and communicators, boy!

Oh come on how much communication are you going to be able to have!? Chances are shit be primitive, yo. Well, you suppose that if Mirit's gone off-line she... Might need something else. But it's secondary to getting your survival equipment all packed away. You'll see if there's room.

Looks like there is, between one thing and another - and also some room for some spare clothes, yo.

... Well, this looked like a good time to pack that in, then. And commerce, too, though you're starting to overpack a bit.

Just a bit, but that's what pockets are for - got some saleables or tradables too?

That was the idea, with the utility knives. ... Silver? Gold? Any- Just some crap you've gotten for birthdays. Worth a shot, maybe.

You shrug and take the silver loonies.

Time to go through, and pray you come through near her.

At least you were sensible enough to keep a light on, and you walk through the portal. ... That's... Odd... You adjust the light. It... stays purple. And that's when you notice you're inside a house, with several windows that also have oddly-tinted light...

... Crap. Does the place look occupied?

Nope, thankfully. It seems to just be a server room.

... A server room? You look at said server, and blink again. Welp. You're boned.

There is a single screen - red background, black beating heart. There's also a box next to it with a bunch of... thumb drives? Someone's scribbled 'take only 1' on the box.

Yep. Boned. You take one of the thumb drives... At least you thought to bring Lappy with you. Up comes a command prompt! HEART SERVER PLUG AND PLAY DETECTED. USE THUMB IMPRINT TO CONTINUE. ... Okay then!

Isn't hard to start that up...

... SIGNATURE NOT NOTED BEFORE THIS DELTA POINT. NEW ENTRY CONFIRMED. NOTIFYING LOCAL ADMIN. WELCOME. PLEASE SELECT A HANDLE THAT YOU WILL USE FOR THE REST OF YOUR STAY HERE IN TIMELESS SPACE, SO WE MAY CROSS-CHECK IT WITH THE PARADOX DATABASE. THANK YOU FOR YOUR CO-OPERATION.

'SakamotoKazuma'

Cross-checking . . . . . . . . HANDLE AND THUMBPRINT MISMATCH. PARADOX DETECTED. PLEASE TRY AGAIN.

... Hm. That's... Interesting and possibly a little disturbing. And it's waiting on you, too. You try something a little more obscure than that. Well, you don't mind drawing a bit on your family legends. 'HatamotoMomotaro'?

Cross-checking . . . . . . . . CONFIRMED, CORRECT HANDLE. WELCOME, HatamotoMomotaro.

It begins installing a chat client on your computer, sort of- it's all .dll. And it's also looking like it's got some menus that it can go through. Job boards, contacting the local admin through both AIM and Skype, Resleeve, Calibrate, Help (Local Orienteering), Help Help (Map Use), Help Help Help (Commands and other items), and NEW KIDS CLICK HERE, SIGNED, TOOT ORIOLE.

... Oh, ha ha, a tutorial. Well, might as well see...

It would seem the little bird with the trumpet wants you to calibrate!

Hm. Well, shouldn't be too difficult, let's see here...

Looks like there's a little hiccup- metasomal genes in a few places. Toot says Dead Momotaros are the Enemy and you should go along with the Calibrator's corrections!

Yeah, that's fine.

It starts and then halts the process. It's a laundry list of minor issues you might like fixed, apparently?

Yes, that's fine too.

... Aaand it starts to unfold into a... bed? Not quite, but close.

You're not nearly so bad aboout needles as Mirit is, and stay awake for most of it until the chelation starts to hurt. At which point it asks if you'd like to be sedated.

Yes please?

You are Momotaro, and you are now unconscious. It's a little trippy.

By the time you wake up, it's daylight out, apparently.

The light is weird though - cool-colored instead of warm like you usually think of sunlight.

... Right. Let's shrug on some clothes and go check it out.

The first thing that hits you is that the sky is green. Not just a faint blue-green, but as green as the sky back home is blue. The second thing that hits you is that there are two suns in the sky, right next to each other from your perspective. One is faintly blue, the other, smaller star is a sort of weak yellow. There are few clouds out, and overall it's a little misty. You're on a plateau, apparently rather high above either the cloud line or a cold body of water - below the cliffside is only roiling clouds. You see treetops in the mid-distance in said clouds, and they leave beautiful swirling shapes in the flowing fluffiness.

The plant life is faintly reddish to orangeish, and the ground has a similar reddish-brownish tint. There's a few paths leading away from the server-house.

... You check your compass and the time and start to head down the path that won't have the sun in your eyes. It would seem that the Ocean of Clouds is to the west, and that the planet is at a hell of an angle to those suns, as they're pretty far north-east... which sends you down the southern path, which rambles through the grassland, and eventually comes to the edge of the plateau, and starts a series of switchbacks you can't see the bottom of due to the omnipresent mist.

... This is actually really fuckin' odd. What is this, some kind of lone mountain? No other moutains around?

Not that you can see, though it does seem to be pretty long and relatively narrow...

... You decide to see if you can measure out the area aroudn the plateau, and especially keep on a lookout for any structures other than the server haus. You know on flat land you get about two miles an hour at a good pace, so at least you can figure out part of where the hell you are.

It looks like the server house is near the southern end of the plateau. As you go, you notice there's a slight downward slope to the north. The scrubby grassland starts to be dotted with little trees and thickets, and soon you find yourself at the edge of a lake. It has the same green tint as the sky.

Well of course it does! Hm. Interesting. And no other buildings for miles and miles, huh. Haven't heard any familiar creatures, either...

Well, you can hear what you're pretty sure are frogs. And then the surface of the lake breaks, a head on a long neck towering over you. "Ah, there you are."

"..." Nessie? Wasn't that a hoax?

Not Nessie, no, the head's the wrong shape. Looks more like a water dragon, especially with that curly little beard. "You're the newcomer, what was it- Hatamoto Momotaro?"

"Heh, yeah." Well, he's not the real Peach-Boy, but why not?

"I see. Welcome to the Nexus, then. I'm your local admin."

Blink. Blink blink. "I get the feeling I should be a little more surprised than I actually am." Still, you're not about to look a gift dragon in the mouth.

"Probably, yes." She sort of shrugs, starting waves in the water, making them lap at your feet. "Did you have any questions, young one?"

"What's the nature of timeless space, exactly?" ... That's probably not the sort of question she was looking for but you're curious and can't help but ask.

"Weeeeell..."

That's gonna take a while. You are now Mirit, and you have just woken up after being sedated and treated for a laundry list of conditions of which you were previously unaware. What's going on around you now?

Well, it's certtainly the same cave it was when you went to sleep, that much is clear.

... Who is this strange blonde girl smiling down at you and why does she have a pointy black hat on?

"Bwuh?" You blink and rub your eyes. Still there? Yep. "H...ello?"

Oh god her voice is stupid cutesy like she's watched too many moe shows. "Hello~s! Is yous the new arrivals, Mirit?" Ugh, stop putting 'da ze' at the end of every sentence! She's a grown woman!

"... Yes, I'm Mirit." You kind of find it kind of endearing. D'awww.

"Oh, good~s! I is Marisas, and I's your local server admins~" She grins, like she's done just what she needed to do!

You sit up carefully. "Ah, hello then Marisa. Um..."

"Yeeeeees? I am here to answer questionses and solve incidentses!" Beat. "And I'm all out of incidentses."

"Uh, where am I exactly? Besides the obvious."

"Ah... Timeless Spaces is... Kinds of the sorts of places where yous gos when there's no places else yous can be. In time or in spaces." Beat. "You is also in a caves, yep yep!"

"No, really? I thought I was in a grand palace!" Beat. "Right then."

"Anyways... Yous pretty close to my Great Forests so Marisas decided to take a little trips!" ... She's blonde, but speaks perfect Japanese. She dresses like a typical witch except she has a bunch of pockets in an apron- which are filled with bottles of... something. You could swear you see an eight-sided mirror in one pocket. In her hand is a wand that is so ridiculous you're surprised it doesn't zap somewhere else in timeless space. Though, to be fair, you're pretty much a strawberry blonde, but you look more like a typical young adult.

She does the fist pound thing. "Oh! That's right, Marisas needs to introduce herselfs! Kirisame Marisas." Nod nod.

You respond in kind automatically. "Kaidata Miranda." Beat. Obvious question time! "You're a witch, aren't you?" In fact that name is niggling at the back of your mind...

"Yeps. Just an ordinary witch~s," she says. "Pleased to meet yous, Miss Kaidata!"

Waitatick- "... The Marisa that stole the precious thing? THAT Kirisame Marisa?"

"Ah... Marisa dunnos about precious thingses... And Marisa only borrowed thingses. Youkai lives hundreds of yearses! Marisas is human, they could gets it backs after Marisas died!" ... Hm. Well, she hasn't heard of Nico Nico, then, which you suppose rules out some crazy otaku girl.

You ponder that. That... Hints at your many-worlds theory then... "Well, it's a pleasure to meet you as well, Miss Kirisame."

"Aaaanyway... This is a caves. Caves are damp and cold and not like the houses of Marisas. We should go theres, shouldn't wes?"

"That sounds like a plan to me." You nod and carefully try to stand. Hopefully you're not still woozy.

She helps you. ... Strong legs, very strong, and a good grip. Once you've got your feet under you, you're pretty well good to go though! You start to carefully gather up your things once she releases you - unless she's already done that. Most of it is, save for the tea lights, which have guttered out. How are you seeing again? ... Oh. There's a mage light up there. You suppose you shouldn't be surprised.

You are anyways. "Woah."

"Heh heh heh~" She's exuberant, near-dragging you out to the cave mouth, which she seems to know well. Is this a common entry point? Or does she just know how to get here by heart?

"Come here often?" ... That came out flirtier than you intended it to.

"Ehhh?" And that was flirtier than you've heard her. "Well, I do have to maintains the servers~"

"That helps explain the game logic..."

"Huh? Game logic?" She pronounces it like she's never heard of something like that. ... Not an otaku...

"Sort of like... Where I came from, a server wouldn't be able to unfold into a bed, but that sort of thing is commonly seen in games."

"... Hu~h. But how would you make the little piece on the boards sturdy?"

"Huh? Ah... not just board games. Computer games, and pen-and-paper too."

"Con...pyuu...taa...?"

You hold up your netbook.

"Ohhh, one of Rinnousuke's servant god dealies! That do tasks!" Yep, she knows what those are. Um. Sort of. Or maybe she's having one on on you, considering she claimed to be the admin.

"... It's mechanical and electric, but close enough." If she is, no sense spoiling her fun.

"Anyways, we's at Marisa's brooms now! Sos if Miss Kaidatas has any questionses they needs to be askeds nows before we takes off~"

Stuffstuffstuff. "Are you liscenced?" Your turn to tease. What? You're still woozy from the anesthesia, you're allowed to be derpy.

"Licenses is for peoples who haves a governing body, not for Marisas!" Okay now she's definitely having you on.

You kind of smirk though. "I think I'm good for now. Still kinda woozy."

"Okays, then Miss Kaidatas should ride in front of Marisas while she pilotses!" And... Yep. That's a broom. And it's hovering. Holy shit. Yeah, you listen to the witchy lady.

And AWAYYYYYY SHE GOES. And those are some big ol' poofy bloomers she has. Not that you can see much of them given you're in front of her. Boy are you glad you wore pants today! Ohgodsflyingeek.

Now that you have a moment... That's some green skies. It looks like you were in some sort of canyon, or valley, and over it to the... South, you guess, is a large forest, that seems to get darker and deeper. Far away, you think you can spot the faint green line on the horizon which you suspect is some sort of ocean, but you're not entirely sure.

You are sure, however, that Marisa might be gripping you a little too tightly.

You're also sure that you've filled out - your pants are uncomfortably tight, and you're pretty sure your waist was smaller than that sort of tightness indicates... And of course you can't say anything over the wind.

In any case it's not long before you land near the biggest tree in the place, which seems to have a house growing out of it. Or maybe the tree is growing out of the house? You're not sure, but it looks kind of neat and you spend a good several minutes just pondering it. "Huuuuuu~uh."

"Miss Kaidatas haven't even looked insides yet~" She helps you in.

... What a mess.

"... And I thought my place was a disaster area." You deadpan. The flight has helped clear your head at least! There are books, and what you can only assume is magical and chemical equipment, and nothing's labeled... And this is all just the entryway! Boooooks. Is there a tour going on, or do you have time to examine DEM BOOKSES?

Not really, she seems to be putting things away. Or not yet, at any rate. "Marisas knows it is a bit untidy but please make yourselfs at home~"

"Thank you, Miss Kirisame." You start to do just that, looking around curiously but not poking into anything that's clearly meant not to be poked at.

So what's dem books about?

Magic. All KIIIIINDS of maagic. It's a magic parade! A magic bonanza! If she laid them on a kitchen table that wasn't covered in dirty dishes it'd be a magic buffet!

... It's official, you died and went to heaven.

There's also a lot of pictures of magic. Well. At least what books you can get at. Ooooh. You examine them with interest. There aren't any mirrors around anywhere, are there? Besides the one Marisa has.

There is! It's... Buried, but it does exist! Oh hey mirror. You idly take a look at yoursel-

"My hair is green. WHY IS MY HAIR GREEN?!" Oh gods what else changed?!

Well, the tightness certainly isn't illusory.

"It wasn't green befores?" She pokes her head in to look at you.

"No! It was blonde!" Well, bleached blonde BUT THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT. You're staring at the long ponytail in shock in one hand, and have your button-down shirt pulled open with the other. What. The. Fuck. You didn't need a bra before, but you sure as hell do now.

"Well, between that and your face you'll never want for attention, at least~" ... Wha- how old even is she-?!

Your entire face is now bright pink as you scramble to re-button your shirt.

Pop.

Your expression is probably priceless.

"... Aw, Marisas didn't means it like that." She helps you out of the mess that is her bathroom and starts taking measurements that are wildly different from what you had before. Seriously you used to be a little stick, and now you're some- some curvy vidja game cheesecake girl- what- Of course to get anything close to accurate, you end up having to strip down to your now rather abused panties. It doesn't help that your vision is now kind of blurry.

"I- What-"

"Ah... Something wrong?"

"... I apparently just went through all the puberty I missed out on, all at once?"

"Better lates than nevers..." ... Okay, maybe compared to Marisa it's not so bad?

"Point taken, but still..." It does help that your hair's finally taken on that silky smooth pin straight texture you'e always envied your siblings for having.

"It means yous has the figures for magic!" She's grinning a big grin.