Greenpop by dumbgreenposter

https://pastebin.com/u/dumbgreenposter

>Fizzlepop Berrytwist, a few weeks after almost destroying the world
>Sitting in the back of an introductory class on human culture that she had to pass before she would be allowed to cross to Earth and find a coltfriend
>Which she had to do by the orders of both Princess Twilight and Cadance
>"Welcome, everypony, to humanities 101. Your one-stop shop for learning the Dos and Don'ts of visiting Earth." Cheerilee walked in, followed by a tall and lanky creature walking on two legs
>Weird creature, was this one of those humans she'd heard about?
>Obviously, it wouldn't be here if it wasn't
>"Now, does anypony have a question?" Cheerilee asked
>All the hooves went up
>"About the class, not for our guest?"
>Most of the hooves went down
>"Okay, you in the front."
>"What's the biggest difference between pony and human culture?"
>"Good question. Among ponies it's sometimes acceptable to form herds because of the low male population density. Humans have been shifting towards that breeding structure for a few years now and it's left them with a surplus of male humans, some of which have no qualms about dating outside of their species."
>Cheerilee's assistant stood up
>"She's totally right, you know. As a male human the dating scene is brutal, especially if you're looking for a committed relationship. It's so bad, in fact, that the concept of dying alone has become a common joke to talk about with friends."
>"Which is why we are happy to invite humans to Equestria." Cheerilee adds
>"But doesn't the emigration of males to Equestria cause a shortage of males issue on Earth? Is it really moral to pass our problems to another species?"
>Cheerilee's smile darkens
>"They've had what we've wanted for all of history and now they're throwing it away. The cause of their problem is our solution."
>Cheerilee's Anon spoke, "In all honesty, I'm in favor of it, because women aren't really all that nice to deal with." his smile darkens, "They dug their own grave this time."
>"Any other questions? You on the right."
>"What's divorce?"
>"That's a rare human custom in which a marriage is nullified by the state and the bride and groom seperate. In most cases, the bride decides she no longer loves the groom or is caught taking up another lover, after a divorce a very unlucky groom can end up losing everything from shelter and money, to friends and family. It's one of the reasons why there is such a large discrepancy between suicide rates by gender."
>"I thought marriage was forever."
>"It certainly should be." the human said
>The rest of the four-hour class was one part informative, one part horrifying
>After it was done, Cheerilee signed off on it and you took the form to Twilight
>Apparently most humans the portal found for you would be incredibly easy to convince
>You waited in line with the group that was in the class earlier
>The DHA frontdesk mare called your number and you stepped forward
>A pony holding a clipboard read off of it
>"Fizzlepop... Berrytwist?" she said
"That's me." you went to the back with her
>"So, the portal can find you somepony you'll be most compatible with, but you'll only have a few minutes before the portal collapses and pulls you back through." she says, pulling a switch
>The doorway sparks to life, a light blue aura emits from the veil
>"You have five minutes."
>Wow, not stressful at all
>N-not that you cared about finding a coltfriend
>You took a breath and stepped into the portal
>You fall for a brief moment before stepping out into Earth
>You look around
>The air was bitter and dry, like there was smoke everywhere
>And the world was devoid of color
>You look at the notecard you were given
>It read 'Anon Y. Mous'
>You looked to be on a sidewalk
>Cheerilee brought this up in the class
>Watch out for cars
>You were wondering why the humans didn't walk in the open space with the yellow lines when a metallic carriage flew down it
>That was probably why
>Fucking cars
>4 minutes
>The area seemed empty
>Was this some kind of mistake?
>You look again at the notecard
>It was worth a shot
"HEY ANON!"
>Nothing
>"What? Holy shit a talking horse!"
>Above, a person was looking out through a window down at you
>The window shuts and for a moment you wonder if you scared him off
>3 minutes
>Behind you the door to the building opens with a chime and the human from before steps out
"Are you Anon Y. Mous?"
>"Yeah..." He looked a little confused, "What's happening here?"
>You shouldn't be smiling l, but you were hopeful
>You'd never seen a penis in your life aside from that one time the Storm King decided to strut around naked
>If he was like any of the other humans you learned about, once you landed him he wouldn't want to seperate
>Time is of the essence!
>2 minutes
>Anon stares at you nervously, waiting for your reply
>Come on! Say something, Fizzlepop!
>Nothing comes to mind
>You just smile silently and awkwardly
>You really wanted to say something but you had no idea what to say and you couldn't really make yourself speak
>1 minute
"You are... I came here to bring you back so you could be my coltf- boyfriend!"
>"Okay."
>WHAT
>HOW IN THE WORLD WAS IT THAT EASY
"A-and we're going to have foals together."
>"I want five. And I want to invite my parents to the wedding."
>You stare in disbelief
>Any stallion would've laughed you out of the room for that
"And I'm also going to sit on your face."
>"That sounds like fun." Anon gave you a dumb smile
>You didn't really mean that last thing
>You just couldn't believe it was this easy
>Or that Anon had no issues with leaving his home dimension with a strange pony
>30 Seconds
>You grab onto Anon's sleeve with your mouth and pull him back to the portal with you
>Surprisingly, he goes with it and walks with you
>As you step out of the portal, Anon almost trips and catches himself
>The ponies waiting in line after you clapped their hooves on the ground
>"Good job, Fizzlepop. Have a nice lif- Oh! Wait, Cheerilee is hosting another class you and your new coltfriend should attend tonight at 7."
>Anon squats down and wraps his arms around you, lifting you up off of the ground
>"Fizzlepop! I love it!"
>tfw somepony who wasn't your dad hugs you
>"Oh man, everything is so colorful, and you're super soft." Anon's hands ran through your fur as he holds you up to his chest and starts walking for the exit
>"We got a carrier!" the mare with the clipboard says, rushing in front of Anon before he gets to the door, "Honey, you gotta put her down! She needs to be showing you around town."
>Anon sets you down gently
>"Sorry." he gives you another hug
>"Okay, Fizzlepop you need to show him around town, your home, some important places. Make sure you go to Cheerilee's class tonight."
>You walk with Anon in tow, following you like a baby duck
>He kept his hand on your back the whole time as you went through the streets back to your apartment
>It was a small place upstairs from a jewelers/metalworking shop/foundry
>Rent was cheap here because Rarity was a nightowl worker, how else was she going to make all of those fabulous things for her art, she couldn't trust those hook-beaked gryphons to make her jewelry
>You unlocked the door to your home and stepped in, turning on a light
>Anon shut the door and looked around
>The place was sparsely furnished, with the minimum required to make it livable
>Anon drops to all fours and lays on the shag rug you kept in the main room
>"I love these rugs." he says, standing back up, "They're great for sleeping."
>He follows you around, touching everything in your home curiously
>Suddenly you're lifted off the ground again, Anon burying his face into the side of your neck
>"Thank you so much. I didn't know anyone else cared." he says quietly, losing that dopey tone in his voice
>He sets you back down
"It's fine, really. I'm happy to have you around."
>Anon goes back to your living room and looks out of the window by your front door
>"I can't believe this is all real."
"You're not going to wake up back on Earth or anything. This is real."
>Anon stares through the window in silence
>It's 6:45
"I'm thinking we should leave before it gets any later. We wanted to go to that class, right?"
>"Of course." Anon makes for the door a little slower than you
>As you walk with Anon, you can feel him drifting further behind
>He's stopped walking and is just staring into the sky
>It was getting dark, winter really cut down on daylight hours but optimized time for indoor snuggling
>You look up as well, several constellations were already visible
"What are you looking at, Anon?"
>He's just looking upward dumbfoundedly
>"All the stars..." he looks back at you and starts walking again
"Right, you can see the stars at night."
>"Not as much back on Earth. I only ever saw an empty sky."
>You crane your neck back to look at Anon
"Empty sky?"
>"The cities were so bright you could never see anything. The sky is always empty."
"Well we have lots of stars visible at night."
>6:02, late
>But it's just around the corner
>Anon grabs the door for you as you two walk in
>The class didn't start at exactly 6 so it wasn't like you missed anything
>There were a few other mares with their bfs as well, all sitting in pairs
>"Well I think everypony's here, let's get started shall we?"
>Cheerilee and her husbando were up front
>They went together perfectly somehow
>"Okay we've got a lot to get covered in an hour and the most important place to start is to help you two understand eachother."
>Cheerilee's husband went through a short slideshow showing the various nuances in pony facial expressions and what they meant, then over human expressions and the ways they use their hands to talk
>Anon scooted a little closer to you
>Cheerilee went over some nutrition information explaining the differences between pony and human diets
>Looks like Anon couldn't eat that hay you had in the fridge
>Up next were more lewd slideshows
>The importance of caution and magic during intercourse
>Anon's arm snakes around your back and pulls you closer
>Cheerilee flicked through some diagrams explaining what was where on mares and humans
>Apparently humans can mate for 5-7 minutes but it can stretch much further depending on many factors
>Up next was something unusual
>"Chances are, your coltfriend is from the US and there's something you should expect when the time does come." Cheerilee noted
>A few of the guys in the room seemed tense
>"It isn't practiced worldwide, mainly in the US for aesthetic purposes." her husbando added
>They went down a darker tirade on circumcision but quickly explained that what's done is done and love is much deeper than looks
>You look at Anon
"Is uh... Did they do that to you?"
>"Hahaha... Yeah." he set his elbow on the table and turned away from you slightly
"It doesn't matter to me, I like you for you."
>Anon turned back and smiled
>At the end of the class, Cheerilee and her husbando urged everyone to be safe and happy
>Anon and you stepped out into the night, he looked up at the sky again
"It's beautiful, isn't it?"
>"Not as much as you."
>Those words warmed you
"Th-thanks."
>Anon walks with you home, though it was dark, it didn't seem so dark
>"Don't you two look adorable together!"
>You and Anon turn around, it was Twilight
>"You know, I only recommended that you go try to find someone. But I'm happy to see you went through with it!"
>Anon picks you up off of the ground again
>You suspect it's a nervous reaction
>Twilight gasped, baring a cheeky grin
>"Aww, he's one of those ones too." she regained her composure, "Anon, is it? Can I have a moment in private with Fizzlepop here? We'll be right back, promise."
>Anon sets you down again, his random displays of affection weren't unwelcomed but you wished he would warn you
>Anon leans against a pole while you walk off with Twilight
>"I'll be right here! Take your time!" he calls out
>"Do you know why me and Cadance have teamed up to bring ponies and humans together?"
"I get the basics of it."
>"It began a few months ago, actually. I accidentally brought a few humans from Earth while looking through other worlds."
"It's very good that you did, I like Anon a great deal already."
>"And Anon likes you. Much more than you could possibly imagine." Twilight walked slowly down the street
>"But those humans I brought to Equestria had some interesting things to say, it was only jokes but it made me realize the state of their society was decaying like ours."
>You raise an eyebrow
"Decaying?"
>"Nopony values themselves anymore. Those first humans would joke about someone named Anne Hero, but I soon realized they were talking about killibg themselves. They get told they can be anything when they're younger, then they get older and others stop caring, friends just turn on you, family sometimes. Same as here."
"What are you getting at, Twilight?"
>"Even Starlight Glimmer would joke about her stupid cutiemark and how she didn't care for magic. She only wants to fly. Turns out she didn't value herself either, so I played matchmaker with Cadance and coerced them into going on a few dates."
>"The key to loving yourself is finding something you can love about yourself, Starlight and her coltfriend cared for eachother and then found value in themselves through their relationship."
>Twilight stopped walking
>"So, I want you to take care of Anon. I know he might not be the brightest, but he cares about you more than he does himself."
>You wheel around, getting in front of Twilight
"I was planning on being kind to him. What makes you think I wasn't?"
>"I was just worried, me and Cadance picked him out especially for you."
>Twilight smiled hopefully
>"Have a good night, Fizzlepop."
"What was the point in telling me any of that?"
>"It'll make sense in time, I probably should've waited but I can't unsay it now. If you ever have doubts about Anon come see me."
>Twilight turns and walks off
>You watch, confused, and then head back to where Anon was waiting
>He was staring at the ground
>Anon lights up the moment he realized you were coming back
>He breaks off from the wall and walks with you
>"Today's been crazy, don't you think?"
>It has
>It got you thinking
>Damnit, Twilight got into your head
"Yes. Say, Anon, what do you think of me?"
>Anon scratches his head
>"What do you mean?"
"You're awfully attached to me. Why is that?"
>You regret asking, you regret listening to Twilight's crap
>Why couldn't you enjoy this?
>"Why do I like you? Well, for one, you changed my life. It's probably not much but I'm thankful to have you."
"Nevermind any of that." you try to shrug it off
>"What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
>"Was it something I said?"
"No, you're fine. I shouldn't have asked you that. I don't know what I was thinking."
>Anon goes wide-eyed and neurotic
>He reaches for you but stops and crosses his arms together
>His steps are getting more rapid as he walks past you
>"I said something wrong, didn't I? I didn't mean to-"
"No Anon, you're okay. Please calm down."
>Anon takes a deep breath and drops his arms
>"You swear there's nothing wrong?"
"Yes, why do you care so much about what I think?"
>Anon doesn't answer
>"Which way is home?"
"Ours, yours, or mine?"
>"I don't know. I don't ever know what's going on and I'm scared." Anon crosses his arms again and hunches over
>Human expressions were hard to read, so little was said with his face
"You don't need to be scared, I'm here with you."
>"I don't know what's happening, or where I am, or if any of this is real. I'm supposed to be sticking by you and you're mad at me." he explains, a tear falls onto his sleeve
"Is this about my question? I said not to worry about it, you don't need to be worried, I'm not mad at you!"
>Anon sits down on the street
>You take a seat next to him in the dirt
>"If you say so, I'll chill out... Why did you come to Earth?"
"It was lonely here... I... I don't know what I was hoping for, but I found what I was looking for." Anon wraps his arm around your side and pulls you in
>"I'm really thankful you came when you did." he says
>You look up at the skies
"I sort of know how you feel, being in a new world with nopony you know."
>"Almost like you're all alone, at least we've got eachother. That's new."
"Yeah."
>"So, I've been wondering. What happened to you?"
"My... face?"
>"If you don't mind telling."
"You think it's ugly, don't you?"
>"Fizzles, you're easily the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."
>You stifle a bashful giggle
"Nah." you wave a hoof at him dismissively
>"Yeah." Anon pulls your hoof down and holds it against his chest
>You nod
"W-well maybe."
>Anon gets up, hoisting you to his chest as he does, "I think we should head home, it's way late."
>Anon walks home, he refuses to put you down so you have to guide him
>It was a good feeling, being held
>Anon seemed starved for affection, as were you
>But maybe he needed this
>You could imagine what he'd gone through, it was like your own life
>A left, a right, another left
>Anon climbed the stairs and unlocked the door
>He walked in and laid you in bed
>Then Anon walked off
>Was he not comfortable with sharing a bed?
>You crawl out of bed and walk back to the main room
>Anon was sitting on the couch with his eyes closed
"Hey Anon?"
>Nothing
"Anon?" you nudge him with a hoof
>With a sharp inhale, he jolts to life
>"God, you scared me." he says
"Sorry about that. Are you coming to bed?"
>"Uhh... I was just gonna sleep out here tonight."
"Oh... Okay. Goodnight."
>"Night."
>You slink back to your bed and lay down
>It was only day 1
>You just lay in bed, unable to sleep
>It was kind of understandable, Anon had barely known you for a day
>3AM
>The bed felt cold tonight
>You roll over a few times, not able to get comfortable
>Your bedroom door opens slowly
>Anon?
>He walks over to your bed and lifts up the covers, hitting you with a blast of cold air
>Something larger than you slides onto the bed and pulls you in
>You could feel Anon's face in your mane, warming your neck
>It was a little warm with Anon
>But it was better than being cold
>He pulled the covers back over the both of you
>You hadn't done something like this before, this was so much better than the pillow
>When you woke up the next morning, Anon was still there
>He was awake but trying to go back to sleep
>And with both arms wrapped around you, he seemed to determined to keep you in bed with him
>Good lord, he had you in an iron vicegrip
>A-at least you didn't have anywhere to be
>As the sun slowly rose, your room brightened
>At some point a little after sunrise, Anon began to move and get out of bed
>"Morning, Fizzy." he said, brushing his hand down your neck
>You roll to face Anon and get out of bed too
>Anon lifts you off of the bed
>He needed to stop it with the holding
>This wasn't oka-
>Anon sits down on the couch and leans back with you on his chest
>Yet again, you were too comfy to voice your protests
>With Anon's face in your chest fluff, you start going back to sleep with him on the couch
>For a moment you almost forgot your crippling lack of confidence with stallions
>Your biggest issue with ever talking to stallions was sitting right on your face
>N-not like that
>Your horn kind of did cause you to be a social outcast
>Not many stallions wanted to even talk to the scary, lanky mare
>You were what they pictured when they heard the word 'rapist'
>But Anon didn't seem to be able to tell
>As the sun finally began to shine, indicating morning was well over, he decided to wake up
>But you weren't done yet
>Just a few more minutes
>You hadn't gotten cuddles since you were a filly
>Anon didn't argue, and wrapped his arms around your back to better apply your chest fluff to his face
>Eventually, you both come to the silent agreement that it was time to get up
>11AM
>Anon rolls, sliding out from under you and standing up while leaving you on the couch
>He stretches, what a weirdly-shaped creature
>"So what's happening today?" Anon yawns
>You didn't have anything planned for today
>You had a lot of cash left over from Storm King's payroll if you transferred stormbucks for exotic furniture and art and then traded that for bits, and you made profit too
>Basically you were living like a NEET for now
"We should get breakfast... Or lunch at this point."
>You crawl off of the couch and stretch
>Anon starts getting dressed
>H-he was in underwear and you didn't even notice
>All that skin-to-fur contact
>You can feel your face heating up
>"Food sounds good- Hey, are you okay?"
"Y-yeah..."
>Anon picks you up again, looking into your eyes
>"You're such a pretty pony." he says as his nose comes into contact with yours
"Th-thanks."
>You didn't have anything to wear and were getting used to going nude everywhere
>Apparently humans always wore clothes for protective reasons
>Anon straightened out his clothes as you walked to the door
>As you opened it, you are greeted by two of the four princesses
>Twilight and Cadance, you opened the door up moments before they were about to knock
>"Hey there Fizzlepop, we just wanted to check in on you and Anon." Twilight says
"If you're wondering, I haven't killed him."
>"Ahahaha, really try not to, Fizzlepop." Cadance laughs nervously, "We found him especially for you."
>Cadance and Twilight invite themselves in
>"Woah, who are these two?" Anon motions to the two ponies
>Cadance starts making short chat with Anon while Twilight talks to you
>"So how goes things with Anon?" she asks
"He... It's clear he doesn't see me the way a typical colt would."
>"That's a neat thing about humans, their females are evil. You and every other mare in Equestria beat 3.5 billion possible mates by virtue of being capable of love."
>3.5 billion?
>You look at Anon
>He really dropped everything on Earth for you
>"There wasn't much on Earth for him, he's a passionate romantic and his love would be lost on a human female."
"Oh."
>"That is so cute!" Cadance squeals, talking with Anon across the room
>Twilight turns back to you
>"You'll be good to him, won't you?"
"Of course. He- He's the first to ever look past my looks."
>"I trust you, Fizzlepop. Anon trusts you too."
>Twilight turns to Cadance
>"Cadance, do you want to head back home?"
>She nods, "It's a love more pure than any, Fizzlepop. He cherishes you beyond words!" she said in a singsong tune as she practically floated by
>As soon as they left, you look at your hooves
>Why couldn't Twilight trust you with this?
>Your dark thoughts were immediately pushed away by Anon
>He had dropped onto all fours and was leaning curiously into your field of view with impressive contortion
>"Hey, don't look so sad." Anon says
>You straighten up and look away from his game
>He cherishes you beyond words
>Anon makes another move to get into your line of sight but you face away
>"Weren't we going to eat?"
"Yeah. Let's go."
>You lead Anon through the busy streets towards a little cafe you ate at sometimes in the midnight hours
>You notice Anon moving a little sluggish
>He sees that you notice
>"Just a little tired." he says
>You and Anon take a seat at the little table in the corner of the cafe
>Less chance of being spotted
>You trade out the lunch menu for a breakfast menu and look at it
>Anon scoots in next to you instead of across, and peers at the menu
>"I uh... I can't read any of that." he says, pointing at the pony manuscript on the menu
>Anon yawns, "I'll have whatever you're getting."
>As the waiter pony walks up, you make your order
"I'll have an omelet with some daisies."
>"Me too."
>You look around the cafe and notice a pony gawking at you
>She giggles and then keeps walking
>You sigh and stare at the table
>Anon had made you forget that you were still an ourcast
>His hand came up under your chin and turned you towards him
>Anon smiled gently
>He made you forget
>His hand ran through your mane
>"Smile, Fizzy. You're beautiful." Anon said, leaving a kiss on your cheek
>For the first time ever, you finally felt comfortable with yourself
>Even if Anon was incredibly strange, even for a human he was really weird
>He looked at you with an even greater softness than your parents did
>He didn't lie when he said you were beautiful
>You couldn't stop a cheeky smile from appearing
>"There she is!" Anon said, wrapping his arm around you, "There's that pretty smile."
>Tears welled up in your eyes
>How in all the world had you been denied this saccharine love for so long?
>So many years wasted, so many cold nights, far too many lonely days
>The tough commander melted away under Anon's unwaivering gaze
>You lean against him
>You're glad he wasn't sitting across from you
>You just wanted to sit here forever with him
>Anon's hand went through your mane again, settling behind your ear and rubbing in a small circle
"S-so you and I are... Together?"
>Anon stops rubbing
>He is silent for a moment
>Your heart skips a beat
>FIZZLEPOP WHAT THE FUCK
>YOU RUINED IT
>WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU
>"Of course, why wouldn't we be?"
"I... Uh. Nevermind."
>"Well, you came and got me from Earth so that makes me yours, and since I'm not planning on leaving you ever, you're mine."
>Anon laughed and hugged you against his chest tightly
>"You're stuck with me forever!"
>Hahaha...
>You hoped he would never let go
>Finally the waiter came back with your orders, interrupting one of the few hugs you've ever recieved
>Anon looks like he regretted getting daisies in an omelet
>Humans probably don't eat those
>He definitely tried, making a muted cringe with every bite
>"Those sure are bitter, huh?"
"I think they're okay." you were getting used to eating real food instead of Storm™ food-flavored pudding substitute
>Anon ate less than a quarter of his food and then noted that he had made a horrible mistake
"You can get something else, it's no issue."
>"I'm good, I needed to make some changes to my diet anyways."
>You and Anon walked out of the cafe after paying for the resonably cheap food
>Anon tried to pay with a strange rectangle, and then with green paper
>He seemed really upset when he found out "they didn't take American Express"
>It cost you like four bits for the both of you
>You also found out the Earth economy is in shambles because Anon freaked out over four gold coins
>Apparently he lived on like 3 bits a week
>Something about the value of gold
>You weren't a pony that studied economics, but humans seemed to have no idea how money worked
>Paper wasn't money
>Gold was money
>You and Anon had a whole... afternoon left to do stuff
>And nothing to do
>He sat down under a tree with you, relaxing in the shade
>"So how long have you lived here?"
"Only a few weeks."
>"Before that?"
"I, uhh... I worked for a really nasty guy. He tried to take over the world."
>"And Twilight was just cool with you, no problems or anything?"
"I don't think she trusts me fully... I'm really trying to change."
>Anon lays over in your lap
>"I don't think you need to change, you're already a good pony. I can tell."
>You laugh nervously
"I-I..."
>"She trusts you enough to leave me with you. That or she doesn't care." Anon shrugs
"Do you trust me?"
>"Because I see good in you, yeah."
>You place a hoof on Anon's head, trying to pet him like he did to you
>It isn't as effective when you did it
>After a few moments of your hoof on his face, Anon sat up and drew a knee close to his chest
>"So, what did you do before you moved here?" he shifted uncomfortably
>You suddenly realized what had happened
"Oh my gosh, are you into hooves?" you ask with a smug grin
>"N-no..."
"Ha! Yes you are!"
>Anon crossed his arms
>"I've just... You put them right in my face, what were you expecting?!"
"Tell me, what else do you like?"
>"I've been alone my entire life, I don't care as long as I get to feel intimacy."
>That struck your heart directly
"Yeah... I see where you're coming from."
>Damnit Anon, quit taking the wind out of your lewd sails
>"What did you do before you moved here?"
"I-I... I did a lot of things I regret now."
>"That's okay, everyone makes mistakes."
"I was misguided, I'd take it all back if I could."
>"But then you'd be completely different."
"I'd be a better pony."
>"You're perfect the way you are."
>You look at Anon
>What drove him to be so... good to you
>You'd done nothing to deserve this
>"What about before that?"
"Before what?"
>"Before your job for what's-his-face, the nasty guy who tried to take over the world?"
"I'd rather not go any further into my past. I want to be happy in the present."
>"That's fine."
"What about you, Anon? What was your life on Earth like?"
>"It was... It was empty. I don't really want to go any further than that."
"What do you want to do with your new life here?"
>"I have some plans, but I can't tell you yet." Anon smiles
>You lay down in the grass under the tree
"Why can't you tell me?"
>"It's a surprise for you."
"Well in that case..." you lean in and whisper "Pleeeaase?"
>"Nope. Lips are sealed."
"Are they?" you rush in and give Anon a quick smooch on the lips
>"H-hey! That- that's not fair!" Anon changed from green to red
>You'd never had a kiss before, it was certainly satisfying
>You'd never have done that to anyone else but Anon
>He just made you comfortable enough to let down your guard and act like a normal pony for once
>Anon was still bright red
>You had accidentally gotten too lewd, even for him

***A Different segment***
>The rest of the day went quietly
>Anon sat with you in the park, watching the day go by
>No amount of persuasion would get Anon to talk
>Curses
>A few ponies were talking and walking together in the distance as the sun set
"You're killing me, Anon."
>"What? How?"
"I have to know, what is it?"
>Anon sighed
>"I was saving this for a better time, but I think it would drive you crazy to wait any longer."
>Anon grabbed one of your forehooves in his hands
>"And besides, it's beautiful outside right now."
>He shook nervously
>"I wasn't sure how ponies did this, so I asked Cadance - don't tell her I got her name right - and she gave me this."
>Anon produced a bit of silky pink ribbon from his pocket and tying it in a bow around your hoof
>"Fizzlepop, would you. Uhh.
>Anon regains his composure, taking a deep breath
>"Will you-"
>You stop him right there, squealing loudly and pacing in place jubilantly
"YES!" you tackle your new lanky green alien husbando and hold onto him
>The noise attracted the attention of some bystanders, who applauded quietly in the distance
>Another happy couple
>Far away, the crystal heart lit up, one of many times it would light up each day
>Cadance emitted the same excited squeal and paced in place
>Shining Armor came down from the bedroom, to where Cadance had been watching the crystal heart for hours
>"Dear, it's 3am, please come to bed and stop screaming. Flurry Heart and I can't sleep." he said tiredly
>"She said yes! Hahaha I knew she would, true love is real!"
>In the distance, Flurry Heart began to cry loudly
>You try to get up off of Anon, crying joyfully
>He held onto you, keeping you in a hug you didn't want to get out of
***End Segment***

>The evening passed into twilight, not the princess one
>You sat in Anon's lap, his arms wrapped around your belly
>No matter what, he always insisted on making contact
>Some humans could be touchy but Anon was excessive with it
>Not that you minded
>As the sun dipped below the mountains in the distance, a pegasus came by lighting the streetlamps
>She paid the two of you no notice as she went by
>You look up at the night sky, staring at the numerous stars and remembering Anon's words about the empty skies on Earth, you gained a deeper appreciation of it
>You laid back in the grass, completely content with sleeping outside if Anon was there
>Again, the human shifted and partially laid on you
>Anon's arm was strewn across your belly and his head rested on your chest
>You think he was asleep
"Anon, we can't sleep out here." you nudge him with a hoof
>He holds onto you a little tighter and grumbles
"No seriously, if we're sleepy we need to go back home."
>Anon went limp for a second before he got up off of you
>"It's not that late."
"You were sleeping on me."
>"I was closing my eyes."
"That's sleeping."
>Anon rubs his eyes
"Come on, I have a bed that isn't grass."
>Anon walks with you as you head back to your home above the foundry
>"Now I'm awake." Anon stretched as he walked
>He always contorted so weirdly when he did that
>Like one of those inflatable arm-flailing tubes but slow
"Well we can be awake at home, I don't like being out at night."
>"What's there to be afraid of?"
"I don't like the dark." you glare at Anon
>"This is probably the safest town I've ever been in. Let me tell you about Detroit..." he rambled off about some place back on Earth that was "loaded with knickers"
>Silly humans
>There was a suspicious white and purple mare working in the foundry while you walked up the steps to the door
>Why even bother locking it?
>Ponyville had literally no crime aside from >rape
>In Ponyville's defense, the human didn't have a waifu and was just walking around at night, in the middle of estrus
>He was kind of asking for it
>He even agreed to that statement in court and didn't file a charge against any of the 23 mares involved
>Speaking of which, you'd have to keep Anon indoors for a few weeks
>Anon grabs the door for you and shuts it behind him
>He lays down on the shag carpet and stretches out
"That's not the bed."
>"I'll sleep here." he says, muffled by the carpet
"No, you gotta come to bed." you tap him with a hoof
>Anon stands up and follows you to bed
>Before Anon can lay down you stand up on the bed and lift your tail up
"Hey Anon, do you wanna maybe..." you trail off, swaying your hips slowly
>Anon stares for a second, computing
>"Tomorrow." he yawns and climbs into bed
"Fine." you grumble, laying down next to him
>Anon was incredibly warm
>And you were pretty tired
>Tomorrow, tomorrow you'd try again when you weren't tired...