The MLP Chronicles, Short #1: The Fight of April 1st

> You hear it, the ominous laugh
> It’s generic yet terrifying to behold, the villain of everything you’ve come to hate and despise
> Destruction, removal, the erasing of all you are
> This foe now stands before you in the field outside your house.
“Who the fuck are you, and why are you outside my house?”
> “I AM THE MIGHTY MOOTZEUS, AND I HAVE COME TO DESTROY YOUR PRECIOUS CREATION.”
> The wily demon, hundreds of feet tall with oozing flesh and corrupted metal covering his entire body, grins dastardly at your meager size below
> You don’t know who or what the fuck a Mootzeus is, but you can’t let it destroy what it most precious to you.
> Around you, stand dozens
> Hundreds
> Thousands of your loyal and stationary minions, your beloved gnomes murmuring for you to defend them.
> “Master…. Master…”
“Chill, guys, I won’t let you guys go to this random abomination.”
> A loud roar of laughter erupts from the monster, hilarity gained from your pathetic desire to protect your family.
> “YOU FOOL! NOT THOSE UGLY ASS THINGS, THIS WORLD! YOUR WORLD!”
“Well, that’s bad too! I can’t let you do that, Godzeus!”
> “TROLOLOLOL, YOU DARE TO DEFY ME, THE DESTROYER OF ALL THINGS CUTE AND FLUFFY?!?!”
> He stretches his arms out, howling to the sky in the coldest manner you can imagine.
> Your spine is chilled to the nerves, your legs quivering at the sight, as storm clouds come overhead.
> But you know what you must do. You’ve fought ridiculously large things before, and you’re not even close to being truly being afraid of this monster.
> Your ten hearts healthbar appear, and you raise your hand to the sky
> Shut up, you haven’t collected all the heart containers yet.
-----
> Your hand to the heavens above, you call to the Goddesses you’ve served, for in their name shall you become the vanquisher of darkness, the champion of light and creation.
“Nayru, Din, Farore! Beseech me with your blessing, and grant me the power to fight ONCE MORE!”
> A beam of light down from the heavens burst through the swirling cloud of looking chaos, and pierces the ground upon you, your soul revealed as the aura flows through.
> A golden triad appears below you, seen from miles away
> From your raised hand glows a white sphere, gathering in size and intensity, the power emitted from it a beautiful sight to behold as runes circle it.
> “WHAT?! WHAT IS THIS MADNESS?! BUT NO MATTER, WITHIN THE HOUR I SHALL GAIN THE POWER TO DESTROY ALL!”
> The light around your limb disippates, and from what is left emerges Evil’s Bane
> The weapon of the gods
> The Master Sword rises in your possession, eagerly awaiting the death of your enemy before you.
“Your reign of terror ends here, Mootzeus! Prepare to meet your end!”
> The field that once hosted the battle of Gundams has now become your setting once more, still healing from the scars of the clash
> Soon to be fresh with ravaging once more.
> You charge forward, lightning shooting across the sky as you race against a divine being of darkness.
> Gleaming at you with a humored expression, he balls his spiky clawed fist, and swings it down to crush you like the ant you are.
> Swing the Master Sword to meet him, the connection of the two opposing forces shoot out waves of energy on both sides of you.
> “WHAT POWER! HOW IS IT THAT A MERE MORTAL COULD MATCH THE LIKES OF ME?!”
“You fool! To challenge a Hero with the destruction of everything they love is a sure way to get your ass kicked!
-----
> Your strength is limitless, yet so is his, as you sink deeper and deeper into the ground with such intensity.
> Retracting his arm, you take this chance to leap on his bladed gauntlet, raising your sword and spearing it into his deep red flesh.
> “ARRRRRRRGH!?!”
> Ripping you the weapon and leaping off before his other hand could slam you into his palm, you land on the ground gracefully as the gigantic demon yell with such vulgarity at the little prick you are.
> “ YOU GOD DAMNED MOTHER FUCKING CUNT THAT FUCKING HURT LIKE THE SON OF A BITCH YOU ARE”
“Shut it, you asked for trouble, now it’s time to stick to your words!”
> Lifting one of his stone hooves above you, you see the towering limb crashing down on you in seconds.
> Dropping the sword in panic, you take both your hands in front of you, barely catching it in time.
> The earth below you shatters, plunging deeper and deeper below. While your power may be on a equal level as his, the field itself is no match.
> You might as well be playing jump rope on a sheet of glass.
> “BWAHAHAHAHA! BE SQUASHED LIKE THE INSECT BEGGING TO PERISH!”
> You can’t hold out for much longer, for even diamonds can crack with enough pressure.
> Your arms straining themselves, you feel the hoof as it slowly lowers onto your back, as you attempt to support it with your whole body
> And failing fairly soon.
“Is this really how I’m going to go? Was I not the one meant to defeat him, and save this world from everlasting destruction?”
> A voice fills your head, serenity filling your mind as a vision before you begins to take form.
> “Anon, you must believe in yourself, hold out until help gets there in time!”
> Princess Celestia’s head is floating before you, a hallucination before you pass away from this blemish in the universe.
“But… I can’t…!”
> “Sigh… Scootaloo is going to be adopted. By someone else.”
> Your eyes shoot open, rage pounding in your ears
> Your muscles tense up with newfound energy, and energy flows all around you.
“GYYYYYYAAAHHHH!”
-----
> You leap up, lifting the hoof with ease as you send the dark lord crashing on his ass
> “JESUS H. MURPHY, HOW CAN THIS BE?”
“Do not doubt the power of the Hylian!”
> The triad glows beneath you once more, and the Master Sword shoots from the debris, landing into your hand once more
“Heroes! I ask for your aid, please! Lend me your strength!”
> A voice booms from a speaker behind you, far away.
> “Hold on der, partner! We a-coming, get ready!”
> You turn around to stare at the bizarre sight , Mootzeus following suit.
> “LOLWATTHEHELL?”
> Giant robots are surfing the ground, six of them
> All different animal shapes and colors, they rush for your aid
> A Pink Alligator
> A Yellow Rabbit
> A Blue Tortoise
> A Purple Owl
> An Orange Dog
> And A Walking Diamond
----
> Launching themselves in the air to cover you, the dust clears as the Mane Six Doomsquad have been summoned to your aid.
“Guys! You’re… here.. to help?”
> Twilight Sparkle: “Of course! We can’t let one of our friends get hurt while we do nothing!”
> A huge robotic snake, a gold color, burst from the earth smoothly, flowing next to you.
> Pinkie Pie: “C’mon and get in! It’s time to parrrrrtaaay!”
> A door to the machine opening, you hope in without a second thought, as the machines begin to transform and fuse together.
> The Mighty Morphin’ Power Ranger’s theme here
> The alligator and dog transfuse into the owl, turning into feet and legs, as the owl’s wings spread across
> Your snake and the rabbit fuse into the sides, becoming the LIMBS OF JUSTICE!
> The tortoise slams down on top, transforming into a head
> The diamond impales the poor owl, becoming the crest of all that is good
> The Animal Megazord HAS COMPLETED
-----
> Stomping the ground in a fury matching no other, the Animegazord points it rabbit-turned-hand at the villain in question, ready for its demise to be done.
> Everyone: “WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK WE ARE?!”
> “METHINKS THIS WAS A BAD IDEA AFT- RUH ROH”
> The Triforce glows on your hand, your personal wish granted as the master sword next to your lap atomizes, flowing as energy through the machine, reaching its arm.
> A super sized version of the Master Sword materialized in your zord’s hand, once more craving for death of the demonic entity before you.
> Rarity: “You brute, it’s time! ”
> Applejack: “This big ol’ butterknife thing is shining with an awesome power!”
> The sword begins shining brightly, a force of power  generated from the gods themselves
> Pinkie Pie: “These cupcakes are telling me to defeat you!”
> Rainbow Dash: “Take this! All of this awesome, this epic, all of our power, 20% cooler!”
> Fluttershy: “If that’s alright with you…”
> Twilight Sparkle: “SHININGGGGGGGGG-!”
“Uh… BUTTERKNIFEEEEEEEEE!”
-----
> The Animegazord vents open, energy rocketing it forward as it closes the gap to the evil lord Mootzeus
> Your sword retracted, the arm prepares itself to slice the demon in half, as fear gathers in its eyes.
> “NO, IT CAN’T BE! I WAS JUST A SIDESTORY VILLAIN THAT WAS CREATED ONLY TO BE KAPUT OUT OF HUMOR, I CAN’T END LIKE THIS! NOOOOOO!”
> The Zord clears right through it, slicing it cleanly in half as the monster begins to evaporate in the might of your team’s power
> As the clouds clear and the threat of world’s end now gone, the seven of you strike a pose!
> “WE DID IT!”
“Now, how did you guys get these Zords?”
> Hehe, it’s a long story…
> THE END