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  1. > **SCP-2338-B:** You don't believe me, do you?  That's okay.  Eomi said that you wouldn't right now, but you will.
  2. >
  3. > **Ms. Sato:** Eomi seems to know a lot of things.
  4. >
  5. > **SCP-2338-B:** She does, Ms. Sato.  She really does.  Hey, would you turn the TV on for me when you leave today?
  6. >
  7. > **Ms. Sato:** Of course, Sun-hee. What channel would you like? We still haven't figured out that remote for you, sorry. Obviously it's fairly low priority, with... Sun-hee, are you ok?
  8. >
  9. > **SCP-2338-B:** I feel weird, Ms. Sato. Eomi, she's showing me things, from the future. Those people need to know something.
  10. >
  11. > **Ms. Sato:** Which people?
  12. >
  13. > **SCP-2338-B:** The ones up there, watching. There's.. they're wrong, they need to know...
  14. >
  15. > **Ms. Sato:** Sun-hee? What are... Oh!
  16.  
  17. ***
  18.  
  19. There had been a shift in the room. In reality. Imperceptible to anyone who hadn't lived a hundred stories, who couldn't feel the structure in their bones. There was more to this story, still more. Gordon clamped a hand over his eye, fighting the migraine spike that had just run an icicle through his brain. Something new was pushing through.
  20.  
  21. ***
  22.  
  23. 02:17:07 <%minmin>  I was under the impression that there was a direction to it
  24. 02:17:14 <%minmin>  lampshading that there isn't is not going to help your case
  25.  
  26. 02:17:51 <Rimple>   Where do I lampshade lack of direction?
  27. 02:18:00 — Rimple did not intend to
  28.  
  29. 02:19:37 <%minmin>  the ending?
  30. 02:19:48 <%minmin>  I read ahead
  31.  
  32. 02:19:52 <Rimple>   Oh, ok
  33.  
  34. 02:20:01 <%minmin>  as it stands I was expecting the infection to be something more insidious
  35. 02:20:08 <%minmin>  but no
  36. 02:20:21 <%minmin>  it's the central concern of one branch and that's it
  37.  
  38. 02:20:54 <Rimple>   Yeah - it only affects the iteration of Barker that caught it
  39.  
  40. 02:22:04 <%minmin>  meh
  41. 02:22:43 <%minmin>  it's slightly better than the Let Me Sit You Down and Explain a Thing intro orientation tales
  42. 02:22:48 <%minmin>  as far as intros go
  43. 02:22:58 <%minmin>  but it's not a good intro
  44. 02:23:09 <%minmin>  because it doesn't carry itself beyond being an intro
  45.  
  46. ***
  47.  
  48. "What the fuck??"
  49.  
  50. At first, Gordon thought it was Samantha, but the shout had come from one of the scientists who had been making out in the other corner. They were looking down at the tank, wide-eyed. The tank's glass was gone. The water remained immobile, in shape, but without any surrounding structure. The jellyfish was floating toward them, the girl inside signing frantically. This wasn't right, this wasn't...
  51.  
  52. "It's not real, Gordon." Samantha was gazing upward with an odd expression on her face, curious and calm. "You feel it, right? This isn't part of the story."
  53.  
  54. "I feel it, yeah. It is, though. Just barely under the radar, there but... not there?" The story was supposed to end with them happy, watching the kid. That's what was real, not this, and the dissonance was tearing his brain. There was something pushing its way in, some other story, other presence. Alive and not alive, here and not here...
  55.  
  56. ***
  57.  
  58. 02:31:49 <%minmin>  this is honestly a lot less ambitious than I thought it was
  59.  
  60. 02:32:17 <Rimple>   This tale is, yes. The series as a whole will hopefully live up to some of what you were thinking
  61.  
  62. 02:33:02 <%minmin>  mmmmph
  63. 02:33:45 <%minmin>  one thing that soulless told me before when I was writing one of my tales was that even if it's an intro it has to have a direction beyond "these guys exist"
  64.  
  65. ***
  66.  
  67. The jellyfish was looming over them now, partially phased through the walls of the observation room, its tentacles reaching up around them through the floor. The girl was still signing, alternating rapidly between a splayed right hand and something more complex, her left arm crossed over her chest and her right hand raised, pointing a thumb at herself.
  68.  
  69. "What... what the fuck is she saying?" Gordon was on the floor now, cradling his head. Why wasn't this affecting her like it did him? What was going on?
  70.  
  71. "She's saying, um, five. Five, danger." Samantha turned to Gordon. She was crying, though she probably didn't even notice. "You're not going to remember this, are you Gordon? If it's not even part of the story?"
  72.  
  73. Gordon was reeling, his brain a fuzz. "M- maybe. I don't know. I don't know. I don
  74.  
  75. ***
  76.  
  77. 11:01:22 <Rimple>   minmin: I've been thinking about you said, and I really like the idea of 2559 attaching itself to Barker conceptually?
  78. 11:03:00 <Rimple>   I don't have time to rework the whole thing, but I'm going to see what I can do with the ending, and how it will affect the storyline I'm biulding overall
  79. 11:03:00 <Rimple>   *building
  80.  
  81. 11:16:00 <%minmin>  rimple improving your writing is always good
  82. 11:16:05 <%minmin>  now I feel bad I strongarmed your plot direction
  83.  
  84. 11:17:34 <Rimple>   It's cool - you were right that the ending needed to be sharper, and it's helped refine the ideas I've been floating for them
  85. 11:18:20 <Rimple>   For instance, it gives them a more understandable, emotional motivation to go through with the next stages of Operation Overmeta
  86. 11:21:51 <Rimple>   It also means I can give the author page something of a cliffhanger ending, keep people interested, as opposed to having it as a self-contained series of adventures
  87.  
  88. 11:23:49 <%minmin>  that's what I thought you were attempting
  89. 11:23:54 <%minmin>  a proper series
  90.  
  91. 11:24:06 <Rimple>   I only have a day and a half, but I'm going to see what I can do to alter the 2338 segment toward this goal too - Eomi seeing time backwards makes them a great harbinger
  92.  
  93. ***
  94.  
  95. t know"
  96.  
  97. Samantha was reaching forward, elbow deep now in the jellyfish's bell. She looked blissful, almost, ready for whatever was coming.
  98.  
  99. "She's showing me things, Gordon. A shadow hanging over us, pushing back against everything we do, hammering us down, forcing us along these tracks. We can't escape it."
  100.  
  101. "How do we fucking stop it?" Gordon couldn't see. He couldn't see. He couldn't see. He couldn't fucking-
  102.  
  103. "We can't stop it, Gordon. Nothing we do can change it." Samantha's voice was steely, determined. "But we're going to fucking try."
  104.  
  105. ***
  106.  
  107. 02:29:27 <Rimple>   for the record, min
  108. 02:29:30 <Rimple>   There is sort of a looming insurmountable threat, but it's me
  109. 02:29:35 <Rimple>   Y'know, the author puppeteer or w/e
  110.  
  111. 02:29:39 <%minmin>  I'm not getting that
  112.  
  113. 02:29:45 <Rimple>   I'll find some way to make it clearer, I guess
  114. 02:29:49 <Rimple>   thanks for the feedback
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