Tsundere Rainbow Dash

>You are Anonymous, and Rainbow Dash hates your guts.
>For some reason, this afternoon she conscripted your help and dragged you down to the lake.
>"No! You're supposed to hold it the other way!"
>You look up at the hoop in your hands. After discerning that there is no possible other way to hold it, your gaze returns to Rainbow Dash at the edge of the lake.
>You think you feel your right eye twitch.
"What other way is there to hold it?"
>"The other way!"
>You turn to face the lake, vaguely hoping that this appeases her bitchy nature.
>"That's better."
>Normally you would have said no, considering as Dash has done nothing but give you shit since you appeared in Equestria. However, Twilight, being so devoted to her friends and cute to the point where you could never say no to her, insists that you find someway to get along with the brash mare.
>Perhaps when pigs fly.
>Before you can ask her just what the hell you're doing out here she pushes off the ground and flies up into the sky.
>You let out a sigh and shake your head.
>It doesn't take a genius to figure out what the hoop is for now.
>Seconds later, and with no warning, she reappears from the clouds at a remarkable speed.
>You think you hear the sound barrier pop, and suddenly a rainbow is coming out of her ass.
>Just when it looks like she's about to hit the lake at the speed of a fighter jet, she pulls up with impossible precision and timing.
>Dash may be a bitch, but it's not like she wishes to physically harm you, and you've seen her showing off when she's flying.
>That's why, as she's coming right for you, you don't move an inch in the split second it takes for her to fly through the hoop.
>The sheer power of her flight blasts the hoop from your hands and causes you to land right on your rear end.
>As you're nursing your possibly shattered tail bone, you hear Dash land a few feet away from you, "HAHA that was frikkin' AWESOME! Did you see that Anon?!"
>You manage to force yourself to stand.
"Yeah, so awesome you almost broke my damn back."
>"Crap."
>In a surprise upset, Dash trots over to you with a frown on her face, "Do you need to go to the hospital? Did anything crack?"
>You look at her like she just grew an extra head.
>"Uh... I mean... idiot! You were probably holding it too low or something! I'll take you to see the nurse."
>You hold up a hand.
"I'm fine, it's not the first time I've fallen on my ass."
>She smirks, "I bet not."
>You just sigh and shake your head. Dash has been like this since your arrival, calling you monkey and saying a bunch of unsavory things.
>For the past few months, however, she's been behaving pretty strangely. Today, for example, when she invited you out to help her do her little trick.
>Oh well, it doesn't stop her from being a bitch.
>After a quick and obligatory goodbye you see that the sun is going down and decide that it's time to get drunk.
-------
>You lean over the bar and knock on it, getting the attention of the old grey stallion behind it. He frowns at you, "Anon, the usual?"
>You only nod, and he dips under the bar before returning with the neck of a bottle in his teeth.
>After you plant a few bits on the counter, you crack open the bottle of Applejack Daniels and take a long swig.
>You don't notice Applejack herself slide into the stole next to you, "Mighty fine evenin' Anon."
>All you manage is a grunt of acknowledgement.
>You don't have anything against Applejack; you just don't know her that well, and southern drawl isn't your favorite accent.
>Judging by the way she's talking, though, she's a friendly mare, so you might as well give her the time of day.
>"I was talkin' to Rainbow earlier."
>Another swig of the bottle.
"Yeah? And?"
>Applejack laughs and shakes her head, "She was a might worried she'd knocked your rocker."
>Now that's funny. You can't help but laugh under your breath at that one.
"I didn't take you for a jokester Applejack. Dash worried about me? That'll be the day."
>Applejack doesn't say anything for a few seconds. Then, a grin slowly spreads across her face, "You're a bit thick ain't ya?"
>You raise an eyebrow.
"Excuse me?"
>"It's pretty obvious Rainbow has a thing for ya, Anon."
"Right, and I'm a ballet dancer."
>Her grin falls, and she frowns in frustration, "I'm serious. Last time I saw a girl like her act like she does the stallion she was after didn't know what hit him."
"And what parallel universe do you live in? She's treated me like crap since day one. I mean, if that's how you guys court I'd rather stay single the rest of my life."
>"Alright, alright. I'll give ya that one, but that doesn't mean she don't like you."
>Yet another swig. At this rate you'll actually start listening to her wild fantasies.
"I guess I should give you the benefit of the doubt. All of you are pretty close. I'm still taking what you're saying with a grain of salt though. Dash has been nothing but trouble for me, and I doubt that's going to change any time soon."
>"Ha. Alright, tell you what Anon; From the way she's been talkin' I give it a few days at most before she talks to you about it."
"I haven't been here long enough to consider an interspecies romance."
>"Then let's make it interestin'."
>Oh?
"Alright... I'm listening."
 >"If I'm right, then you gotta help us out on the orchard for two months. Apple buckin' season is coming up. We'll pay ya, but you gotta pull your weight."
"Deal, and if I win..."
>What would you be able to get out of Applejack? You don't know much about her, but you could probably press her buttons if you tried hard enough.
>Wait, you know the perfect thing.
"You get to cook me breakfast and dinner every day for the same two months."
>You think you see a glimmer of worry on her face, but it vanishes in an instant, "Alright, deal."
"Starting tomorrow."
>"And no later!"
>She holds her hoof out to you, and you grasp it in your hand, giving a firm shake.
--------
>You've never been a morning person, that much has always been clear to you.
>Trying to get up in the morning, especially early, is probably some form of torture some higher being laughs at you for.
>Stumbling out of bed and grumbling like a monstrosity from a Tolkien novel, you barely see Rainbow Dash in the doorway of your room.
>You also seem to have slept in your underwear last night, and mister woody feels rather confined at the moment.
>Dash's face goes a deep shade of red, and she fixes you with a glare, "Put that thing away!"
"It is away."
>She scoffs, "Whatever. Breakfast is ready."
"... Excuse me?"
>"I said breakfast is ready. Do I have to say it again to get through that thick monkey-brain of yours?"
"Bitch."
>"Idiot."
"Cunt."
>"Blind retard!"
"What are you even doing in my house? How did you get in?"
>"You left the door unlocked, and I came here to cook your lazy butt breakfast."
"Why are you cooking for me again?"
>The blush deepens, "Just because. Are you gonna come downstairs and eat it, or are you gonna let it get cold?"
"Alright already. Fuck, just let me get dressed."
>With a final huff, Dash pulls away from the door and trots back downstairs.
>It isn't until your head is a bit clearer that what Applejack said last night starts to nag at you.
>She said that Dash likes you.
>Now here is Dash... cooking you breakfast.
>Come to think of it, with how she's been acting these past few months...
>No.
>Nope.
>Absolutely not.
>There is no way that is even accurate in the slightest sense...
>You know, she just takes you out to see her new tricks, bugs you all the time despite her apparent hatred, flips back and forth more than a bipolar psychotic girlfriend on anti-depressents, and now she's cooking you breakfast.
>Mother of God.
>"Hurry up Anon!"
>You manage to haphazardly dress yourself before going downstairs.
>Then, as you approach ground floor the scent hits your nose.
>Salty, meaty.
>Then you hear the sizzling.
>You round the corner of your stairwell and peek into the kitchen. There's Dash, setting a second plate onto the table.
>You see it, calling to you in all its glory.
"Is that..."
>You can only describe the look Dash is giving you right now as the most smug grin on the face of the planet, and frankly, you don't really care.
>That's bacon on that plate!
>With all the excitement of a child on Christmas morning, you sit your happy ass down in that chair.
>Dash sits across from you, her own plate consisting of toast and some hay.
>You gaze down at the plate in wonder, admiring the morsel of bacon and eggs.
"How did you even..."
>"Get it? A while back me and an old friend had a falling out. A few days ago she came back to say she was sorry, and I asked a little favor."
>You scarf down that bacon so fast you're surprised it doesn't give you an immediate heart attack. You chase it with the eggs and orange juice kindly provided alongside it.
>You think you hear Dash laughing, but you don't really care.
>It's been so long since you've had real meat.
>So long that it's literally the best bacon you've ever had the privilege of eating.
>"She had to show me how to cook it. It smells kind of weird."
>You don't know how to show any appreciation to her. Maybe you can start with something simple.
"Thanks Dash... really."
>As quick as a light, her face goes red again, "Don't get any funny ideas. I just owed you something for helping me out all the time."
>You know alarm bells should be going off in your head, but at the moment you don't really care.
-----
>It's been a day since then. Dash dragged you to the lake as her same brash self, and displayed a few new tricks for you...
>Ahem... for her, you were just lucky enough to be there and witness it.
>Yesterday went without incident.
>As in literally nothing of note happened.
>In fact, brewing your morning coffee in the kitchen, you can't help but be a little worried.
>You've gotten almost used to being around Dash so often, and now that she's absent it feels kind of weird.
>You don't have work at the bakery with Pinkie today, so it's an ample opportunity to sit at home and appreciate the rare silence.
>Still, Dash's absence nags at you.
>At least you know what it is that's missing, and you're not just flailing around with no clue on what to do.
>The real question is when the hell did you start missing Dash when she's gone.
>When you first arrived in Equestria, any day lacking her presence was a Godsend.
>There is one possibility, but even thinking about it makes you miserable.
>Have things really reached that point?
>Are you so desperate that the girl who treats you like shit is the one you go for?
>What about Twilight? She's cute enough, and she's smart. A bit on the wobbly side as far as sanity goes, but an absolute joy to hang out with.
>Pinkie is interesting. She's not exactly your boss, and you doubt Sugar Cube Corner has strict employee contracts forbidding after-work trysts behind the shop. She's goofy and weird, but that's what makes her so fun.
>Anyone but Dash, really.
>You're so absorbed in thought you don't even hear the knock at your door.
>A few seconds pass, and this time it's a pounding, like the royal guard have come for your illegal salt brick stash.
>You let out a sigh and rise from the dining table, leaving your precious coffee as you go to answer the door.
>Opening it, you're not the least bit surprised to find Rainbow Dash standing there, a scowl on her face.
>"Why are you so slow? Were you asleep or something?"
"I'm not asleep twenty-four seven, and in case you haven't noticed I'm fully dressed."
>"I'm surprised you managed without me," she says with a smirk, walking past you and flicking her tail in what you can only presume is teasing on her part.
>Trying to ignore how hot it's getting, you close the door behind her.
"If you keep barging into my home I might call the cops."
>"Ha, good luck. There are never any guards in Ponyville." She trots around your living room, examining your tall book shelf and the fire place. "You're almost as much of an egghead as Twilight."
"As far as I know you're no better in that department."
>"Tch."
>If that's all she's going to give you in response you might as well call it quits now.
"You're kind of late for cooking me breakfast and waking me up with a kiss."
>Ha, now you're not the only one blushing!
>She turns to you and glares.
>"Wh... what the hay is that supposed to mean?! I only came over because I need to show you something."
"Down at the lake I presume?"
>"Yeah!"
"Why don't we stay here today? It's comfortable, and I need a break from getting water splashed on me."
>"That's..." She looks away, a frown on her face.
"I have the new Daring Do."
>It's like you flipped a switch.
>Her face lights up in utter joy, "You do?!"
"Yeah. I checked it out from the library yesterday."
>Her excitement quickly changes to anger.
>"That was you?! I spent the whole day looking for that book! Twilight was too buried in an experiment to tell me who checked it out!
"Oh, that's why you disappeared yesterday? I was getting kind of worried."
>"W... worried? Why would you be worried?"
"Well, considering that you usually barge into my house and drag me off by the collar I thought something happened. I was about to visit you today to see if something was wrong. Don't ask me why I was going to, not even I'm sure."
>Dash's gaze falls to the floor, and she scuffs the ground with her hoof, "I guess it's... kind of nice that you were worried about me."
>You laugh.
"Do you have some kind of disease that makes it impossible for you to be nice?"
>"What? No! It's just... dammit..."
>It doesn't take a genius to see she's having trouble communicating her thoughts.
"I remember when I was in third grade, and there was this girl I liked."
>Dash looks up, her gaze locking with yours.
"I was just a little kid. I said she had cooties all the time, and I even pushed her around every now and again. I don't know what it was that made me do that."
>She sighs and shakes her head, "Come on. It's not like I like you or anything. That's stupid... right?"
"You tell me."
>She goes silent, a frown on her face as she falls into deep thought.
>"When you first got here I was scared of you."
"What?"
>"Shut up, don't make me repeat any of this. I didn't know how to react to you. Then Twilight started shoving us together, and I figured I'd just play along."
"Hmm."
>You honestly don't know what to say about all this. It's a rather strange situation.
>Dash looks up at you, her face not in some permanent scowl, nor in minor annoyance. You've seen that wide-eyed look a couple of times in your own world, "When did I stop hating you?" she asks softly.
>Before you have time to answer she's on top of you and you're on the floor, your tailbone in slight pain.
>But that's okay, because her lips are on yours, and the pain is a bit more temporary.
>After a few seconds she pulls away, face flush.
>You open your mouth and promptly get a hoof shoved into it, "Shut up. Don't ruin the moment, idiot."
>She leans down to kiss you again, but all you can think about is that you're Applejack's slave for the next couple of months.
>Fucking Applejack.