Ladystuck Transcript

PROLOGUE
1. Back view of Jade from the waist up, angled upwards to see the skyline of NYC circa 1905. Crowds of  people are visible in the middle ground, and the text sits just over the tops of the buildings. Jade is carrying a valise.
> Jade: Arrive in NYC
Your name is JADE HARLEY, and you are ready for ANYTHING! You have just arrived in the Big Apple for the FIRST TIME, and you can hardly believe your eyes--the streets are thick with people, and the buildings crowd so close and high you’re surprised anyone can see the sky AT ALL.

2. Jade accosts Feferi who is accompanied by Eridan in the background.
Jade: Boy! This city sure is confusing. Can you tell me where Baker Street is?
Eridan: Skiddoo, kiddo.

3. Feferi points to the side.
Feferi: Shore, I know where that is! Just down the road a few blocks that way.

4. Jade waves in thanks as Eridan glares after her with crossed arms.
Gee, folks are so helpful in New York! Well, not the schmuck muttering to himself over there, but that lady was a lifesaver for sure: the fella your brother talked to said that Ms. Rose Lalonde would be available to interview potential flatmates at 2pm today, and it’s already almost 2:20!

5. Jade reaches a set of steps.
It occurs to you that you should probably have booked a hotel, just in case, but the monthly allowance you get from your grandpa's estate is already stretched thin from the trip. You won’t be able to access your trust fund for another few years, but there’s just no way you’re putting off having adventures until then!

6. Jade stands at the door to 221b Baker St.
And here you are! No time to get your bearings--you are Jade Harley

7. Close-up of Jade’s determined face.
and you are going to get this flat!

CHAPTER 1

1. A drawing room, featuring Rose.
> Be Ms. Rose Lalonde
Your name is Rose Lalonde and your MISCREANT BROTHER left you the most MYSTERIOUS MESSAGE this morning; he told you that if you were at home at 2pm today, he would solve all your pecuniary problems. You are NOT ENTIRELY SURE what he is talking about, as you have not so much as hinted that your pocketbook is SOMEWHAT LIGHT these days, but naturally you will follow his suggestion in an IMPECCABLE PERFORMANCE of familial duty.

2. Rose takes a self-satisfied sip.
Besides, it is now almost twenty past the hour, and it will be highly amusing to rub this utter failure in his face.

3. Close-up of a clock face reading 2:20 (SFX: TICK)

4. Large panel of Jade bursting through the door, valise swinging from one hand.
Jade: Sorry I'm late!

5. Reaction shot of a wide-eyed Rose with a faint blush on her cheeks.

6. Same shot/angle; Rose looking down and away, blush present but fading.
Rose: I...presume you are here under my brother’s directive.

7. Jade smiles cheerfully.
Jade: I'm Jade Harley.  I guess your brother must be Dave Strider? He said you had a room to let!

8. Camera cuts out to a horizontal shot of both of them; Rose’s body is squared towards the camera, while her head is turned towards Jade.  Text box is in separate frame.
Rose: He would.
Jade: Huh?
Rose: Allow me to clarify: my beloved sibling has somehow gotten the impression that I am short of funds at the moment. While I cannot deny that the extra income from a flatmate would be--desirable, I am hardly an ideal candidate for cohabitation.

That was rather less sarcastic than you had intended. Nonetheless, you wonder if anything short of simple honesty might soar right over this girl’s head.

9. Close-up of Rose in a tight vertical frame.
Rose: You see, I am a consulting detective. To my knowledge, the only one in the world. It is a dangerous life, and I often come home at odd hours bearing gory trophies. Twice people have made attempts on my life here in this flat; I have received assurances that it will happen again.
Also, I play the violin every day.
10. Jade's mouth is quirked.
Jade: Are you any good at it?

11. Rose has a nonplussed expression.
Rose: ...
I am.
12. Jade breaks into a smile.
Jade: Well that’s fine then!
13. Rose crosses her arms.
Rose: And the danger?
To be perfectly honest, an Oriental such as yourself might be considerably better served seeking quarters in the Chinatown.

14. Down-angled shot of Jade
Jade: I’m tougher than I look! Besides...I don’t speak any Chinese.
(SFX: RING RING RING RING)

15. Rose reaches for the candlestick-style phone.
Rose: I hope you don’t mind me taking this.
Jade: Not at all!

16a. Diagonal cut of the lower half of Terezi’s face, holding a phone
Terezi: Lalonde!  This is Chief Inspector Pyrope. We require your services immediately!

16b. Diagonal cut of Rose answering
Rose: I see. I shall be along at my earliest convenience.
Terezi: I hope that ‘your earliest convenience’ means NOW, Lalonde!

17. Rose sets down the phone.
Rose: Do you see the capricious nature of my trade? As my dear brother so thoughtfully reminds me at every opportunity, it is no fit life for a gentlewoman. Being a consulting detective is a solitary profession, and I would not wish for my irregular schedule to imposition you in any way.

18a. Jade stares for a moment.

18b. Same shot; Jade grins.
Jade: Gosh, Miss Lalonde! If you wanted me to come along so bad, you should’ve just said so!

19. Horizontal frame of Rose.
Rose: What?
20. Jade starts off with her bag.
Jade: I’ll just go put my bag in my room, and we can leave!

21. Rose is in an inset panel.
Rose: ...
You are not entirely sure what has just taken place.

20. Jade takes off down the hall in the background; Rose is turned away from the camera in the foreground.

21. Full-body shot of Rose pressing her knuckles against her smile.
What you are sure of, suddenly but with the utmost conviction, is that however this plays out...
it will not be boring.

fin