iudico

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1iQ6VRwlYtY

i want to run
i want to keep running
i want war
i want to be a warrior

im so sorry for her
im sorry for what i did
im afraid of who i am
im being driven by pain

her smile was gone
her eyes in pain
her tears plenty
her voice breaking

she was hurting as bad as me
she just wanted me to see
she was paranoid, afraid
she had her decisions made

for her, all her life
for her, no choice in life
for her, no choice to strive
for her, others or love

environment distant, fading
environment hated, boring
environment see through, glass
environment subdued her class

her intellect, hidden
her beauty, secret
her humanity, dying
her fears fortifying

i wanted to stay
i couldnt say no
i couldnt hurt tho
i cried when i lay

down to rest in peace
down one soul at least
down emotionally
down payment to satan made

apathy grew on me
to protect me from me
hate of others and me
of everything i see

i broke my mind
i fucked it up
i caused pain
i caused suffering

i stood right on that edge
i looked down from that ledge
i was afraid to take the leap
i didnt want her to feel more pain

am i better? i dont know
is she better? i hope so
do we matter? no we dont
but do i even care anymore

do i even care anymore

do i even care anymore