Here's my latest configuration after bruteforcing for a full day more

  const libp2p = await createLibp2p({
    datastore,
    ...(savedPeerId ? { peerId: savedPeerId } : {}),
    addresses: {
      listen: [
        '/ip4/0.0.0.0/tcp/4001',
        '/ip4/0.0.0.0/tcp/9001/ws',
        ...relayListenAddrs,
      ],
      announce: [
        `/ip4/${myPublicIP}/tcp/4001`,
        `/ip4/${myPublicIP}/tcp/9001/ws`,
        ...relayListenAddrs, // I have no idea what I'm doing
      ],
    },    transports: [tcp(), webSockets()],
    connectionManager: {
      maxConnections: 300,
      minConnections: 50,
    },
    connectionGater: {
      denyDialMultiaddr: async () => false,
    },
    connectionEncryption: [noise()],
    streamMuxers: [yamux(), mplex()],
    peerDiscovery: [
      // mdns({
      //   interval: 2000,
      // }),
      bootstrap({
        list: [
          '/ip4/104.131.131.82/tcp/4001/p2p/QmaCpDMGvV2BGHeYERUEnRQAwe3N8SzbUtfsmvsqQLuvuJ',
          ...bootstrapAddrs,
        ],
      }),
    ],
    services: {
      identify: identify(),
      dcutr: dcutr(),
      //autoNAT: autoNAT(),
      //pubsub: gossipsub(),
      //delegatedRouting: () => delegatedClient,
      aminoDHT: kadDHT({
        protocol: '/ipfs/kad/1.0.0',
        //pingTimeout: 10000,
        //pingConcurrency: 10,
        //kBucketSize: 20,
        peerInfoMapper: removePrivateAddressesMapper,
        //clientMode: true,
        validators: {
          ipns: ipnsValidator,
        },
        selectors: {
          ipns: ipnsSelector,
        },
      }),
    },
  })

  libp2p.addEventListener('peer:connect', (evt) => {
    const peerId = evt.detail
    //console.log(`Connected to ${peerId.toString()}`)
  })

  libp2p.addEventListener('peer:disconnect', (evt) => {
    const peerId = evt.detail
    //console.log(`Disconnected from ${peerId.toString()}`)
  })

  libp2p.addEventListener('peer:discovery', (evt) => {
    const peerInfo = evt.detail
    console.log('Discovered:', peerInfo.id.toString())
  })

  console.log('PeerId:', JSON.stringify(libp2p.peerId, null, 2))

  await writePeerId(libp2p.peerId)

  return await createHelia({
    libp2p,
    datastore,
    blockstore,
  })
}