Cookies drunk one-shot

Jul 17th, 2015
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  1. Be anon
  2. >Is a slow day and nothing funny is happening
  3. >The Warden is passing by and saying her good afternoon as usual
  4. >”Hello Anonymous, got a good nap today?”
  5. “Yeah, I’m just kind of thirsty”
  6. >”Oh, would you like something to drink? I can bring you water, lemonade, juice, milk, spiders, cider-“
  7. “Spiders?”
  8. >”Spiders it is, then!”
  9. “No that wasn’t-“
  10. >But it was already late, she was pouring you a a brimming glass of spiders
  12. >You wake up sweating from the sudden dream”
  13. >”Anonymous?”
  14. >You can hear the voice of The Warden from out your cell
  15. “….Wait what.”
  16. >”Having nightmares so early?”
  17. “Nightmares… woah, this dream must mean something”
  18. >You look at The Warden and she looks at you wish concern
  19. >”Is something wrong, Anonymous?
  20. “No, it must be my thirst”
  21. >”Oh, would you like something to drink?”
  22. >You heavy breath
  23. >”We have water, milk, cider, limona-“
  24. “CIDER!”
  25. >”Oh, okay, don’t need to yell, cider it is!”
  26. >She leaves and you calm yourself a little
  27. >’I swear I don’t know what’s going on in my dreams sometimes’ you thought
  28. >You sit in your bed and think for a while
  29. >…You don’t know what to think
  30. >Suddenly you hear someone.. behind you?
  31. >”Hey Anon, ready for the wedding?”
  32. >Is Sleepy
  33. > Where the heck he came from?
  34. “What are you doing here? And what wedding?”
  35. >”I’m your godfather, and it’s your wedding, are you so nervous that you suddenly forgot it?”
  36. >The fuck
  37. “Woah, woah, woah.. who I’m marring?
  38. >”Why you don’t see her, it’s near The Warden, she is the one marrying you both”
  39. >Okay this got weird, this must be a dream
  40. >You walk to the altar, when suddenly you see the bride
  41. “Who..”
  42. >”Oh Anonymous, you are here, now we can start the wedding, she was waiting for you so long”
  43. >The bride doesn’t move, she is looking forward
  44. “Okay, this is getting crazy, who are you?”
  45. >You yell at the bride, she moves and lift her veil and you can clearly see her face
  46. >You freeze
  47. >This is not a dream
  48. >”Anon, honey! I can’t wait for the honeymoon, you got some ice cream to milk~”
  51. >”But we already have childrens, Anon!”
  52. >Suddenly, two twins minotaurs come from the crowd, both of them yelling at you ‘daddy!’
  53. “AAAAHHHHHH!!!”
  54. >Bronze comes out of nowhere and looks at you
  55. >"Ah I always wanted to be uncle, and now I can start calling you my brother, Anon. We can even start fights of Yo momma all day, every day for the rest of your life"
  56. >At this point, you are crying
  57. >"Oh, he's crying, it is because you know about the other wedding?"
  58. >Other wedding?
  59. "Other wedding?"
  60. >Bust comes near you
  61. >"Why of course, my brother is marrying that cute pie of Cookies!"
  62. >Cookies walks at you side, not looking at you and hugs Bronze
  63. >"I can't wait to cuddle with him, look at those arms!"
  65. >drop sound effect.mp3
  66. >Your heart beat is over the limits
  67. >You wake up in your cell, on the floor
  68. >”Anonymous, here is the cider! Sorry for being so late, I was checking others… why are you on the floor?”
  69. “I was…”
  70. >Don’t you ever say that dream as an excuse
  71. “Doing the dinosaur”
  72. >”Umm… okay, well here is the cider, I couldn’t decide if soft cider or hard cider for you, so I brought two mugs with one and one!”
  73. “Oh, thanks Warden, I’m okay with the hard one, wanna join me with the soft one?”
  74. >She looks at the mug
  75. >”Oh no, no, no, I’m sorry, I have job and being drunk while working is the least thing to do, that would be a bad example for all of you!”
  76. “Well okay then, more for me”
  77. >You pick the mug and The Warden left
  78. >”Good bye Anonymous, if you need something, you know where I am!”
  79. >No you don’t
  80. >She leaves and you look at the mugs
  81. >Damn, you should get drunk to forget those dreams
  82. >Too bad this cider can't get you drunk enough to forget those nightmares
  83. >You don’t even know if this is a dream or not anymore
  84. “Maybe if I…”
  85. >You pick up the mug and smell it
  86. “No, this is not a dream. I… hope”
  87. >Well that was a new record of nightmares, good you have something of alcohol to pass it out
  88. >But you are alone with two mugs
  89. “Maybe if…”
  90. >Suddenly, you got an idea, an awful, awful idea
  91. >Well, not so awful, it’s not like you are stealing the fucking Christmas
  92. >’Cookies has been working hard these days, maybe she needs a break’ you thought
  93. >She only has your cuddle sessions to calm down a little, this should be good for her
  94. >It’s not like she’s passing out while drinking soft cider
  95. >This is it, time to invite her
  96. >You leave your two mugs in a table near your bed
  97. >But before you leave, you need to see which mug is the hard one
  98. >Silly Warden didn’t tell you in which one was the hard and the soft
  99. >Well is not like she knew you were going to share the mugs
  100. >You give it a taste to the first mug
  101. “Hmm, not bad”
  102. >You give it a taste to the other mug
  103. “Yup, this one is the hard one”
  104. >A tongue from a drunk never lies
  105. >Picking up some paper, you write a note and put it under one mug
  106. “H…a…r…d...”
  107. >You write the next one
  108. “S…o…f…t”
  109. >And so you put it down the soft one
  110. “Okay, now to search for Cookies, to adventure!”
  111. >You need to stop talking alone
  112. “I need to stop talking alone”
  113. >Going out, you start your quest for Cookies
  114. Be Bust Bronze
  115. >Walking on the prison corridors
  116. >You wanted to see Anon today after his afternoon nap
  117. >He’s cute when he’s half asleep
  118. >You see The Warden coming and she greets you
  119. >”Oh hi Bust, good afternoon”
  120. “Afternoon Warden, is Anon awake?”
  121. >”Oh yes he is, I think he was having nightmares”
  122. >Oh poor Anon, you need to go and see him!
  123. “In that case, I’m going to his cell and talk for a while”
  124. >”Sure, good luck. Oh! I almost forgot, I gave him two ciders, I think he can share the other one with you”
  125. “Why two ciders?”
  126. >”Well, I didn’t know if he wanted Hard or Soft, so I gave him both”
  127. “I see…”
  128. >”Well I got work to do, see you later!”
  129. “Thanks, good bye!”
  130. >This is amazing, you could stay with Anon while drinking
  131. >A drunk Anon, you brush only to think about him drinking
  132. >He’s so tough, drinking hard cider
  133. >You think of a scene where you drink with him, while you pass out and he cuddles with you for being drunk in his bed
  134. >U-unf
  135. >Uh oh, you are drooling
  136. “This is the best moment to know more about him!”
  137. >You run to his cell with all your energy
  138. “Anon, I’m he-“
  139. >To see an empty cell, just with his bed and the two ciders
  140. “Uh, well I could wait for him”
  141. >You look at the two smugs, one has a note that saids “soft” and the other saying “Hard”
  142. “Hmm, why would Anon-“
  143. >You think about this for a moment and the answer hits you”
  144. “Ok, if Anon write those notes… that must be… he wants to share them with another one who isn’t me…”
  145. >Oh, you wonder who it would be
  146. “Cookies… “
  147. >That lucky mare
  148. “So Anon wants to share this with her marefriend, uh? I got an idea”
  149. >Your brother must be proud of what are you doing next
  150. >You change the notes, so Anon thinks the hard is the soft and vice versa
  151. “Oh I can’t wait to see her reaction when she drinks this”
  152. >You go into the next cell, which is empty for some reason and wait for Anon and Cookies
  155. Be Anon
  156. >Found Cookies
  157. >Poor girl was sweating for walking so much outside
  158. >You go to her side and start talking
  159. “Hey Cookies”
  160. >”So.. much.. heat...”
  161. “Umm, Anon to Cookies, anyone there?”
  162. >”Just.. give me.. a second..”
  163. >She really needs the cider
  164. >”This part of my work isn’t worth it sometimes… I’m so… thirsty”
  165. “Oh well it’s your lucky day, I got two mugs of cider waiting us on my cell”
  166. >”That sounds great but- did you say cider?”
  167. “Yup, fresh to drink”
  168. >”But Anon, I’m working”
  169. “Uh, your turn end, it finished like twenty minutes ago, Cookies”
  170. >”WHAT. What time is it!?”
  171. “Enough late for you to stay outside, now let’s move!”
  172. >”I really need a clock with me…”
  173. >Cool transition.mp4
  174. >Damn, it take so much time to get back to your cell
  175. “I hope the cider is still cold, it’s better when cold”
  176. >”I don’t mind it if the cider isn’t cold”
  177. “Never said that Cookies! Alcohol is better cold”
  178. >True drunk words
  179. >Well that’s weird, the door of your cell is open
  180. “I didn’t leave my door open… did I?”
  181. >Don’t remember, don’t care
  182. “Well whatever, come in Cookies”
  183. >She sits beside you and she has already bedroom eyes
  184. “Here, hold this”
  185. >You give her the soft mug
  186. >”I’m kind of nervous, it’s my first time”
  187. >Oh don’t say it like that please
  188. “Drinking”
  189. >”Uh?”
  190. “Your first time drinking cider”
  191. >”Yes, I hope I can handle this one, even if it’s a soft one…”
  192. >You heard someone giggling
  193. >Well that’s weird and/or creepy, must be your imagination
  194. “You aren’t going nuts with one mug, are you?”
  195. >”I hope not”
  196. >Should you regret this? A cute little drunk Cookies is worth it?
  197. >Of course it is
  198. “Well Cookies, kampaii!”
  199. >”Kam… pai?”
  200. “Ups, sorry, just a way to say let’s drink it up in other language”
  201. >”You are silly sometimes, Anon”
  202. >As she says that, she starts drinking, so do you
  203. >And then you suddenly feel something
  204. >Oh something is wrong, so wrong
  205. >This doesn’t taste hard, not at all
  206. >…This is the soft mug!
  207. “Cookies, wait!”
  208. >Your reaction was too late, Cookies already started to drink
  209. >She looks at you while holding the mug
  210. >”…”
  211. “…”
  212. >She then drinks all the rest of the mug
  213. >This can’t end well
  216. Be Bust Bronze
  217. >Watching from a hole in the cell, you see Anon and Cookies talking while they lift their drinks
  218. >It begins
  219. >Oh boy! This is great
  220. >Should you call The Warden after Cookies hits the floor for being drunk?
  221. >Nah just enjoy the show
  222. >You heard Cookies holding the mug between her hoofs
  223. >”Yes, I hope I can handle this one, even if it’s a soft one…”
  224. >You giggle a little
  225. >Anon seems to have heard your giggles
  226. >Ok you need to calm and watch
  227. >Oh, she’s drinking it!
  229. Be Cookies
  230. >You finally are with Anon and sharing your first cider with him!
  231. >You are so lucky to have a coltfriend so appreciative
  232. >He gives you a mug with cider
  233. >You are mentally prepared for this
  234. >“You aren’t going nuts with one mug, are you?”
  235. “I hope not”
  236. >Well what’s the worst it can do? Make you fall asleep in the legs of Anon?
  237. >No don’t brush, not this time, just be cool…
  238. >“Well Cookies, kampaii!”
  239. ”Kam… pai?”
  240. “Ups, sorry, just a way to say let’s drink it up in other language”
  241. >He’s so silly sometimes
  242. ”You are silly sometimes, Anon”
  243. >You close your eyes and lift the mug to your mouth, feeling and testing the cider
  244. >Hmm, it tastes good, there was no big deal
  245. “Cookies, wait!”
  246. >You heard Anon and you stop drinking for a moment
  247. >Hello, hello, this is brain, giving orders to overload everything
  248. >Brain, this is… who I am?
  249. >Wh-who is who?
  250. >What is going on?
  251. >You feel funny
  252. >You look back at the mug and drink all of it
  253. >...
  254. >…
  255. >…
  256. “Th-this cider is so gooooooood Anon~”
  257. >”Oh no…”
  258. “Wh-why I never *hicks* tasted this before!?”
  259. >You left the mug in the table and suddenly feel like dancing with Anon
  260. “Come with me my dear, let’s dance! The night is young!”
  262. Be Anon
  263. >Maybe she is strong against the hard cider, maybe she
  264. >“Th-this cider is so gooooooood Anon~”
  265. >Or not
  266. “Oh no…”
  267. >“Wh-why I never *hicks* tasted this before!?”
  268. >Well shit, she’s drunk with one single mug of hard cider
  269. >So someone was in your cell and changed the notes…
  270. >“Come with me my dear, let’s dance! The night is young!”
  271. “It’s afternoon Cookie… I mean, I think you should”
  272. >Well she seems to ignore what you said, as she starts dancing in two hoofs
  273. >Damn that’s cute, but how is she balancing herself?
  274. >”Waaah!”
  275. >Never mind that
  278. Be Bust
  279. >You are laughing so hard while watching the show
  280. >You whisper so Anon doesn’t listen to you
  281. “Oh haha, this can’t get any better! Unless… hmm, I wonder what would happen if I broken into Anon’s cell with a drunk guard”
  282. >Two great ideas in one day, you were on fire
  283. >That’s it, now just wait for the perfect moment to interrupt them and let’s see what Anon have to say
  284. >Or Cookies, that would be more funny, despite her drunkenness
  287. Be cookies
  288. >Be hurt for falling from the attempt of dancing
  289. >“Are you okay Cookies?”
  290. “Hehehehe… I like it when you are so worried about meee, heheheee”
  291. >You can’t control what you are saying
  292. >Brain, do something
  293. >…
  294. >Brain isn’t here for the moment; leave a message after the beep and I’ll answer when I’m back
  295. >…
  296. >Beep
  297. >You are on your own now
  298. >Are you?
  299. >A mug of soft cider can beat you?
  300. >No, you must fight back!
  302. >You don’t know why you said that
  303. >Anon looks worried
  304. >“C-Cookie, you should”
  305. ”No, I don’t should! *hicks* You should should!”
  306. >”What”
  307. “Why don’t you look me *hicks* at the eyes when we cuddle!?”
  308. >”But we do Cookies”
  310. >Anon doesn’t move, just keeps staring at you
  311. “You don’t love me anymore?”
  312. >You start to tear a bit
  313. >”But I do love you”
  314. >Tears stops as you heard that
  315. “An-Anon *hicks*”
  316. >You feel like tackling him into his bed
  317. “I-I always wanted to be in top.. of toy… scratching your ears”
  318. >Anon doesn’t say a word
  321. Be Anon
  322. >What the hell just happened?
  323. >Ponies can be this bipolar when drinking?
  324. >Cookies is in top of you as she says she wants to scratch your ears
  325. >This shouldn’t be lewd, but it is!
  326. >You sweat a little, while she is doing the best bedroom eyes while brushing a half
  327. >How the fuck is she half brushing?
  328. “H-hey Cookies, the cider hits hard sometimes… aren’t you tired?
  329. >”Oh Anon, I’m not tired right now, I want to cuddle and boop you and hold hooves all night”
  330. >LEWD
  331. >”Oh and *hick* did I said scratch your ears, I mean to do this”
  332. >Those hicks are starting to be cute
  333. >She is approaching you slowly and moves to your ear
  334. >She bits your ear
  335. >…Holy shit she bite your ear
  336. >It was a soft bite
  337. >”Mmmmm~”
  338. >Sweating intensifies
  339. >Think about something Anon, what would Sleepy do?
  342. Be Sleepy
  343. >Sleeping
  344. >You were dreaming of a beautiful nurse mare at your side, sleeping with you
  345. >Both of you cuddling
  346. >How lewd
  349. Be anon
  350. >Well, I think I know what he would do, but let’s not try that
  351. “Cookies, you need to”
  352. >”Kiss *hick* me”
  353. “What?”
  354. >”I love you, you love me, we are for *hick* one each other!”
  355. >She’s broken
  356. >She boops her nose with yours
  357. >She’s not broken; she’s a machine of cuteness!
  358. >Don’t get a heart attack now Anon, not now
  359. >She is so close, you can smell her, and she smells so good
  360. >She is ready to kiss you
  361. >Fuck it, you are having fun, later she can regret it
  362. >As she is ready to plant a kiss in your lips, both of you hear a familiar voice
  363. >”Well, well, well, forgetting to lock the door again Anon?”
  364. >Oh no, not again
  365. “Is this a nightmare? LUNA, I’M SICK OF THIS DREAMS”
  366. >”You wish this was a dream Anon, right? If this was a dream I would join you both right now, mind if I do?
  367. >Cookies looks at Bust Bronze with disgust, like if she is about to attack her
  369. >She doesn’t seem happy, not a single bit
  370. >”Oh the drunken guard is angry because interrupted?
  371. “So you were the one who changed the notes…”
  372. >”Me? Why would I do such a thing?”
  373. >Yeah sure, and I’m Santa Claus
  374. “Just leave already”
  375. >”That’s rude Anon, I just wanted to enjoy what you two little love birds were doing, but I got bored and wanted to join”
  376. >Cookies seems angry, very angry for what Bust said
  377. >Bust is walking to the bed while attempting to do sexy moves
  378. >You hope this to be a nightmare and wake up
  379. >…
  380. >Why you don’t wake up?
  381. >Wake up Anon, wake up wake up wake up!
  382. >…Okay, this is real
  385. Be Bust
  386. >Starting plan seduction to Anon
  387. >Phase 1, start!
  388. “Oh Anon, you lift right? Why don’t you show me those muscles you have?
  389. >Cookies seems not happy with what you said, not happy at all
  390. >Good, this is fun
  391. >You touch Anon’s muscles while lying down at his side of the bed
  392. “Hey Anon, about the milking of the other day” You whisper in his ear
  393. >Anon eeks as an answer
  394. >You giggle
  395. >”THIS IS IT”
  396. “Uh?”
  397. >Suddenly Cookies kicks you off the bed
  399. >She slaps you twice
  400. >You can’t believe this
  403. Be Anon
  404. >You can’t believe what’s going on, Cookies in a rage moment slapped Bust Bronze, Twice
  405. >Is Bust crying?
  406. >Oh no she isn’t, she’s mad
  407. >Like a bull on a bullfight in Spain, Olé for that
  408. “Girls come on, you shouldn’t-”
  410. >Well you don’t know what to do; at least you should close your door this time, in case anyone sees Cookies fighting Bust
  411. >No time for that, stop both of them!
  412. “Girls sto-“
  413. >As you try to stop both of them after they fight, is too late, as Bust goes for the first move
  414. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3Kdku-IqXc
  415. >Or second, she got bitch slapped after all
  416. >Bust rushes forwards to Cookies!
  417. >Cookies evade the attack and jumps in Bust’s head!
  418. >Cookies start hitting with her hooves her head, making Bust burst in anger
  419. >Bust wrath makes her go full bull, hitting the walls trying to get Cookies off her head, and hitting you by mistake, leaving you in the floor for the sudden hit
  420. >Eventually, Cookies hit the floor
  421. >”Oh you will pay for hitting me”
  422. >You are paralyzed in the floor; you can only look at what is going to happen next
  423. “Bust… wait…”
  424. >”I’m sorry Anon, but she started the fight, she must pay for it”
  425. >As she tries to lift Cookies, Cookies reacts and yells back”
  427. >Somewhere, somehow, a frog is yelling
  428. >Cookies pick up Bronze with all her strength, yelling while doing it
  429. >”Wh-what are you doing!?”
  430. >Is she… Is she doing what I think she is doing?
  432. >”Impossible!”
  433. >Bust fear is growing every second, as Cookies totally got her all lift up
  434. >How can she do that?! She’s only 1/4 her size!
  436. >OH, OH!
  438. >”G-ah!”
  439. >Bust face is all in pain now, you cringe and are amazed at the same time
  440. >Cookies throw Bust to the floor
  441. >Bust is writhing at this point
  442. >Cookies finish her off with a kick in the stomach
  443. >K.O
  444. >Bust is now all knocked out
  446. >You recover yourself, get out of the floor and come near Cookies, lifting her hoof
  448. >And the crowd goes crazy, if there was one of course
  450. >She gives you a quick kiss for the adrenalin
  452. >She snorts
  453. >Silly pony must be all tired from the fight, so cute
  454. >Well that was something unexpected, but it went better than expected
  455. >You wonder how the entire prison couldn’t hear this epic fight, but at least nobody will know about this
  456. >Now you have a drunken fighter pony in your hands
  457. >You leave her on your bed as you look at the now sleeping minotaur in your floor
  458. “Well shit, I don’t know how to explain this to The Warden”
  459. >”Anhs myshs miss mass youss”
  460. >Holy fuck that scared you, Cookies is talking while sleep
  461. >Or at least trying to
  462. >You really need to tell her about this entire fight, John Cena would be proud
  463. >You yawn and don’t know what to do
  464. >This was a good afternoon, well now night
  465. >Shit, you forgot to drink your cider, now is warm, all this situations made you forget your cider
  466. >Well no problem, maybe tomorrow you can have one, all you want to do right now is sleep
  467. >You drink the warn soft cider and left the mug in the table, it tasted like piss, this is why you prefer it cold
  468. >Looking at the sleep minotaur in your floor, you think for a way to lift her and leave her outside of your cell
  469. “Hnnn… how Cookies could lift this big ass monster, I need a fucking loader”
  470. >Nope, you can’t lift her, how Cookies could lift Bust, you’ll never know
  471. >You drag her outside of your cell, to the next corridor, at least it’s far away from your cell, someone should take care of her
  472. >You are done, you are so done right now
  473. >You slowly enter your cell, trying not to wake up the little fighter and close your door, this time locking it
  474. “Well, this day was fun, don’t you think Cookies?”
  476. “I take that as a yes”
  477. >You laugh while resting at her side, giving her a kiss in her cheek
  478. “Good night Cookie, you deserve this rest”
  479. >”Wubhh Suhshh Pffuuu”
  480. >Aww, so cute
  481. >You take that as a ‘I love you Anon, good night”
  482. >And with that, you start to fall asleep with her
  485. Be Bust
  486. >Next morning
  487. >What happened last night?
  488. >”Hey sister, you ok?”
  489. “Eh?”
  490. >”The Warden found you in some corridor in the night; I had to take you back to our cell, what were you doing last night?”
  491. “I don’t… know”
  492. >”Ugh, weird”
  493. “But I had the worst nightmare ever”
  494. >”Oh yeah, what did you dream?”
  495. “I was fighting in a ring… I don’t know who, but whoever it was, he or she was strong, so strong I could feel the pain”
  496. >”Interesting. You couldn’t remember at least the face or name of him or her?
  497. >You both heard steps near your cell
  499. “AH!”
  500. >You jump for the sudden yell
  501. >”What the- Warden, what are you doing?”
  502. >”Anon keeps saying this words every time he’s with Cookies! I can’t get the word out now! It’s funny to say!”
  503. ”I don’t find it funny…” you whisper to yourself
  504. >”So how’s Bust?”
  505. >”She lost her memory last night and had a nightmare”
  506. >”Oh you poor, poor thing!”
  507. “I’m okay, don’t worry Warden”
  508. >”Yes, my sister is as strong as his brother, not so strong, but you know”
  509. >Sometimes you think Chains got more muscles than brain
  510. >”If you say so… Well I’ve leaving, good bye you two, take care!”
  511. “See you Warden”
  512. >You feel like to move but you can’t, the pain is real
  513. “Uh… I didn’t know nightmares could hurt you…”
  514. >”Maybe you were sleepwalking?”
  515. “Maybe, I don’t know, there aren’t cameras in this prison so we can’t know for sure”
  516. >His looks seems to be focused in something
  517. “No brother, I don’t think Anon is involved in this”
  518. >”If you say so, well I’m going to the gym, if you need me, call me”
  519. “I’m going to sleep more, I really feel like I got hit by a dragon”
  520. >”Okay, rest well sister”
  521. >Trying to remember anything of last night makes you get a headache, so you prefer to sleep and think about good things, like Anon, while hugging your monkey plushie
  522. “Good night, Anon Jr”
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