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- A Giant Dork: so, after all that serious shit and junior never getting the attention he truly deserved...
- A Giant Dork: its time to look at some goddamn turts
- A Giant Dork: GO TERPS
- A Giant Dork: ...oh great more subs i gotta do to watch a thing for free
- A Giant Dork: guess i'll subscribe to martial arts madness because hey fuck lets feel nostalgic about going to the mall and watching your dad buy like 5 million martial arts movies
- A Giant Dork: >NO CAPTIONS
- A Giant Dork: guess i'll die
- A Giant Dork: the audio is so stilted
- A Giant Dork: i can't handle this
- A Giant Dork: (yes i can)
- A Giant Dork: also what fucking kidna bumblebee spaceship am i looking at
- A Giant Dork: TIME TO COLONIZE THE EARTH
- A Giant Dork: WITH OUR OWN SPECIES
- A Giant Dork: YOUR PUNY THUNDERBOLTS ARE NO MATCH FOR
- A Giant Dork: THE GREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT
- A Giant Dork: GAMERAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
- A Giant Dork: oh okay just... body slam him, awkwardly
- A Giant Dork: DERP DERP I'M A TURT
- A Giant Dork: THIS CREATURE IS
- A Giant Dork: GAMERUUGSLKJGl
- A Giant Dork: THANKS BOY SCOUTS OF JAPAN
- A Giant Dork: WE REALLY DIDN'T DESERVE THIS THEME
- A Giant Dork: i cant
- A Giant Dork: i cant'
- A Giant Dork: oh my god there are so many scouts
- A Giant Dork: scouts LOCATED
- A Giant Dork: also its subbed!
- A Giant Dork: Wao!
- A Giant Dork: look at all those gallants
- A Giant Dork: and now, we turn to the goofuses
- A Giant Dork: campy in the most literal sense
- A Giant Dork: these kids will kill a man on accident D:
- A Giant Dork: >cutting dinner portion in half
- A Giant Dork: w-
- A Giant Dork: WOAH RUDE
- A Giant Dork: "we're gonna ride in the sub"
- A Giant Dork: these goofuses done doofed
- A Giant Dork: okay is it bad that i'm like
- A Giant Dork: "oh wait, the controls are reversed... oh well might take some getting used to, i'll fix it later"
- A Giant Dork: seems simple
- A Giant Dork: ALAS
- A Giant Dork: prank'd
- A Giant Dork: its not a miracle, they done fucked it up :U
- A Giant Dork: HAPPY FUN TIMES IN A SUB
- A Giant Dork: ALMOST TYPED OUT SOMETHING VERY INNAPPROPRIATE
- A Giant Dork: stupid hands
- A Giant Dork: meanwhile, in space...
- A Giant Dork: the bumblebee ufo returns!
- A Giant Dork: these noises are driving me bonkers >:U
- A Giant Dork: "AAAH ITS A KAIJU"
- A Giant Dork: "oh no that's gamera! :3"
- A Giant Dork: gamera not looking his best here but he tries!
- A Giant Dork: not sure how he got over the "sent into fucking space" issue
- A Giant Dork: "WE SHOULD LEAVE" "no gamera is a friend of all children"
- A Giant Dork: i'm sensing a theme here
- A Giant Dork: "HRAAAGH ALLEGORIES FOR NUCLEAR POWER GONE WRONG AND WAR"
- A Giant Dork: "oh wow, i'm sure they'll be great to protect the children!"
- A Giant Dork: Gamera's the crazy uncle, Godzilla's the grouchy gramps
- A Giant Dork: racing a giant space turtle is a terrible idea, just saiyan
- A Giant Dork: ...I, too, want a giant fucking dinosaur to protect me as a child
- A Giant Dork: SUPER
- A Giant Dork: CATCH
- A Giant Dork: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY
- A Giant Dork: "ah shit we're running low on oxygen"
- A Giant Dork: "I KNOW YOU'rE KINDA TRAPPED BUT HELP US OR WE'LL DIIIE"
- A Giant Dork: ...wow that's the weakest catch ray
- A Giant Dork: wow
- A Giant Dork: gamera 2 fat, but bote 2 smol
- A Giant Dork: >just 15 minutes
- A Giant Dork: weak as FUCK
- A Giant Dork: "WE MUST MIND CONTROL THE GAMERA"
- A Giant Dork: "BUT FIRST.... we must look deep into his past"
- A Giant Dork: his tragic backstory is that he dropped ice cream somewhere.
- A Giant Dork: :I
- A Giant Dork: wait is this a flashback from gamera the invincible?!?!?
- A Giant Dork: IT IS
- A Giant Dork: i don't recognize iguana bitch so i'm probably watching out of order
- A Giant Dork: those are the most "DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUR" eyes i've ever seen on a kaiju outfit
- A Giant Dork: this slapfight is more hillarious than it needs to be and i haven't even watched the origin movie
- A Giant Dork: AAAAAAAAAAA
- A Giant Dork: okay hold up
- A Giant Dork: what the FUCK
- A Giant Dork: is that tongue
- A Giant Dork: is it shooting out cold air or some shit?
- A Giant Dork: I DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING
- A Giant Dork: "i'm too cold and i don't have my 12 lb weighted blanket, fuck me"
- A Giant Dork: DONK DONK DONK
- A Giant Dork: "I LIVED BITCH"
- A Giant Dork: *recycled footage: THE MOVIE*
- A Giant Dork: DUNK
- A Giant Dork: is that a kabuto
- A Giant Dork: he kidnapped a children
- A Giant Dork: how fuckin
- A Giant Dork: i'm suffering through low quality lasers
- A Giant Dork: I'M BLEEDING WAAATEEEER
- A Giant Dork: CHILD: PROTECTED
- A Giant Dork: CHICKEN STATUS: FRIED
- A Giant Dork: CAMPINESS LEVELS ARE MAXIMUM
- A Giant Dork: "KINDNESS IS HIS WEAKNESS"
- A Giant Dork: "TIME TO STEAL A CHILDREN"
- A Giant Dork: oh welp, guess your heel heat is maximum, too
- A Giant Dork: wow you guys just spent all 15 minutes trying to research gamera
- A Giant Dork: yikes
- A Giant Dork: ITS THE BUMBLEFUCK-O H NO MY HEADPHONES ARE HURTIN MUH EARS
- A Giant Dork: AAA
- A Giant Dork: JETPACK BUTT TURTLE
- A Giant Dork: "MURDER US AND WE'LL MURDER DA BOIS"
- A Giant Dork: "LET MUH BOIS GO"
- A Giant Dork: "what the fuck kinda ship is this"
- A Giant Dork: another dufe?
- A Giant Dork: many dudes...
- A Giant Dork: WEIRD INTENSE STARE AT CHILD
- A Giant Dork: BEE ONE OF US
- A Giant Dork: GAMERA, BEECOME ONE OF US
- A Giant Dork: BZZZT
- A Giant Dork: those teeny tiny zaps ain't gonna do shit
- A Giant Dork: CONTROL THE BRAINWAAAVESS and... i think this is gonna backfire horribly somehow :U
- A Giant Dork: GO FETCH US SOME FUCKIN COFFEE FROM SOMEWHERE
- A Giant Dork: LOCAL ONLY
- A Giant Dork: BLACK
- A Giant Dork: LIKE OUR SOULS
- A Giant Dork: >free juice after they were talking about it
- A Giant Dork: NO THE JUICE IS POISONED
- A Giant Dork: th
- A Giant Dork: those sandwiches look
- A Giant Dork: okay?
- A Giant Dork: also it has no crust which is A-OK TO ME
- A Giant Dork: telepathy-powered ship
- A Giant Dork: ...thats not right but does that mean if
- A Giant Dork: i-if i thought about something lew-
- A Giant Dork: ...let's not go that route
- A Giant Dork: "SHIP GIVE ME VALIDATION"
- A Giant Dork: NO WEAPONS OR PARACHUTES ALLOWED
- A Giant Dork: those eyes are CREEPY
- A Giant Dork: delicious apples
- A Giant Dork: no knife tho.
- A Giant Dork: "WHAT'S IN YOUR HAND?" *masao makes a mad dash inside the ship* "A KNIFE" "NO-"
- A Giant Dork: dafaqiisthat
- A Giant Dork: mUH HAT
- A Giant Dork: ITS A SQUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID
- A Giant Dork: AAAGH THE EYES
- A Giant Dork: AGAIn
- A Giant Dork: you sure you wanna free him?
- A Giant Dork: it might be
- A Giant Dork: a TrAP
- A Giant Dork: DETACTHABLE LIIIMBS
- A Giant Dork: woah those bars showed up outta nowhere...
- A Giant Dork: gamera just looks so sad!
- A Giant Dork: oh, dam.
- A Giant Dork: "DESTROY TOYKO"
- A Giant Dork: toyko never gets a fuckin break
- A Giant Dork: "PRANK 'EM BRO"
- A Giant Dork: REUSED
- A Giant Dork: STOCK FOOTAGE
- A Giant Dork: "WHAT AM BUDGET"
- A Giant Dork: SURRENDER OR GAMERA WILL FUCK UR SHIT UP
- A Giant Dork: "so we surrender or we SACRIFICE THE CHILDREN"
- A Giant Dork: okay those are some pretty bad options fam
- A Giant Dork: lets choose the ones that don't fucking suck
- A Giant Dork: ...i have no idea how that rope trick worked.
- A Giant Dork: OHJIM
- A Giant Dork: PLZ
- A Giant Dork: WELP GUESS WE'LL DIE?
- A Giant Dork: *shrug*
- A Giant Dork: don't think batteries work that way bUT OKAY! WE GOT A PLAN!
- A Giant Dork: oh great speciesists, nice
- A Giant Dork: hope ya'll perish
- A Giant Dork: "OH SHIT"
- A Giant Dork: SUCH FOUL LANGUAGE!
- A Giant Dork: SUPER RELEASE RAAAAAAAA
- A Giant Dork: REVERSE STOCK FOOTAGE-
- A Giant Dork: "FUCK YOUR PLANS"
- A Giant Dork: Time to get TOASTY
- A Giant Dork: kill gamera
- A Giant Dork: funny joke
- A Giant Dork: funny joke, thinking you-
- A Giant Dork: ...
- A Giant Dork: oh... oh dear.
- A Giant Dork: TEN MINUTE KAIJU SLAPFITE
- A Giant Dork: this squawking is already 1 million % annoying
- A Giant Dork: is gamera a pogeyman now?
- A Giant Dork: "ofuck tentacles I KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING"
- A Giant Dork: RIP gamear
- A Giant Dork: "I always wanted to try kalimari..."
- A Giant Dork: first you tenderize the meat...
- A Giant Dork: truly the tension is astounding here
- A Giant Dork: *CAMPY MUSI-*
- A Giant Dork: *fucker gets stuck in a rock*
- A Giant Dork: *GAMERA FLIES*
- A Giant Dork: my god
- A Giant Dork: i'm dead.
- A Giant Dork: gamera hate this.
- A Giant Dork: ...ow!
- A Giant Dork: just impale my turt like this?
- A Giant Dork: this is just
- A Giant Dork: so silly
- A Giant Dork: SO LONG GAY BOWSER?
- A Giant Dork: so
- A Giant Dork: fackin
- A Giant Dork: GIVE THEM DINNER MOTHERFUCKERS
- A Giant Dork: WELL UM
- A Giant Dork: OKAY
- A Giant Dork: if anyone asked me now what the fuck this was about
- A Giant Dork: i would answer
- A Giant Dork: "i don't know, watch this with me and we'll find out ~together~"
- A Giant Dork: or, more realistically, "I don't fucking know, all i know is that it had mind control, a squid, and Gamera. also kids i guess"
- A Giant Dork: and watching this has inevitibly taken like
- A Giant Dork: 90% of the enjoyment of the movies it took footage from
- A Giant Dork: i'
- A Giant Dork: so i'll proabbly have to watch those way later, when I have forgotten and i am like a milletian
- A Giant Dork: reborn, not knowing what the fuck
- A Giant Dork: READY TO ABSORB MORE KNOWLEDGE LIKE A SPONGE
- A Giant Dork: moral of the story, always trust a boy scout
- A Giant Dork: and turts
- A Giant Dork: 6/10
- A Giant Dork: NEXT TIME: hopefully i'll actually wait until, i dunno, saturday or sunday to do a live commentary with ivel for old-ass-godzilla
- A Giant Dork: and another goofy movie
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